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These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:00:03,795 --> 00:00:05,004 Coffee. 2 00:00:05,171 --> 00:00:07,423 - Thank you. - Cappuccino. 3 00:00:07,590 --> 00:00:08,757 [SPEAKING IN ITALIAN] 4 00:00:08,925 --> 00:00:11,677 And a nice hot cider for Monica. 5 00:00:11,845 --> 00:00:13,679 Aw, thank you. 6 00:00:14,014 --> 00:00:15,180 - Rach? - Yeah? 7 00:00:15,348 --> 00:00:17,975 Why does my cinnamon stick have an eraser? 8 00:00:19,269 --> 00:00:20,436 Oh. 9 00:00:20,603 --> 00:00:21,937 Oh, heh. 10 00:00:22,105 --> 00:00:23,814 That's why. 11 00:00:24,566 --> 00:00:25,983 Sorry. 12 00:01:24,834 --> 00:01:26,752 TEDLOCK: Chandler? 13 00:01:27,253 --> 00:01:29,630 Miss Tedlock, you're looking lovely today. 14 00:01:29,798 --> 00:01:33,383 May I say that is a very flattering sleeve length on you? 15 00:01:34,177 --> 00:01:35,219 Yes. 16 00:01:35,386 --> 00:01:39,556 Well, Mr. Costilick would like you to stop by his office at the end of the day. 17 00:01:40,266 --> 00:01:43,727 Oh, listen, if this is about those prank memos, I had nothing to do with them. 18 00:01:43,895 --> 00:01:46,230 Really, nothing at all. Really. 19 00:01:46,564 --> 00:01:47,606 Nothing. 20 00:01:51,444 --> 00:01:52,945 Hey, you guys. You guys. 21 00:01:53,113 --> 00:01:55,948 Chandler's coming, and he says he has this incredible news. 22 00:01:56,116 --> 00:01:58,534 So when he gets here, let's all act like, you know... 23 00:01:58,701 --> 00:02:00,244 - Hey. GROUP: Hey. 24 00:02:00,411 --> 00:02:03,038 Never mind. But it was gonna be really good. 25 00:02:04,040 --> 00:02:05,791 ROSS: What's going on? RACHEL: What's up? 26 00:02:05,959 --> 00:02:08,460 It's a typical day at work. I'm inputting my numbers... 27 00:02:08,628 --> 00:02:10,462 ...and Big Al calls me into his office... 28 00:02:10,630 --> 00:02:13,632 ...and tells me he wants to make me processing supervisor. 29 00:02:13,800 --> 00:02:15,968 - That is great! - Congratulations. 30 00:02:16,136 --> 00:02:18,387 So I quit. 31 00:02:18,847 --> 00:02:20,222 BOTH: Why? 32 00:02:20,390 --> 00:02:22,641 Why? This was supposed to be a temp job. 33 00:02:22,809 --> 00:02:25,727 Yeah, Chandler, you've been there for five years. 34 00:02:25,895 --> 00:02:27,312 I know, but if I took it this... 35 00:02:27,480 --> 00:02:30,149 ...it'd be like admitting that this is what I actually do. 36 00:02:30,316 --> 00:02:31,608 So was it a lot more money? 37 00:02:31,776 --> 00:02:34,403 Doesn't matter. I just don't want to be one of those guys... 38 00:02:34,571 --> 00:02:38,157 ...that's in his office until 12:00 at night worrying about the WENUS. 39 00:02:41,327 --> 00:02:42,619 "The WENUS"? 40 00:02:42,954 --> 00:02:46,665 Weekly estimated net usage system. It's a processing term. 41 00:02:47,375 --> 00:02:49,668 Oh, that WENUS. 42 00:02:50,837 --> 00:02:52,045 So, what are you gonna do? 43 00:02:52,213 --> 00:02:54,423 I don't know. That's the thing. I don't know. 44 00:02:54,591 --> 00:02:56,675 I'm not gonna figure it out working there. 45 00:02:56,843 --> 00:02:59,094 Oh! I have something you can do. 46 00:02:59,262 --> 00:03:01,513 I have this new massage client. Steve. 47 00:03:03,224 --> 00:03:06,018 Anyway, um, he's opening up a restaurant... 48 00:03:06,186 --> 00:03:09,021 ...and he's looking for a head chef. 49 00:03:10,523 --> 00:03:12,983 Um, hi there. 50 00:03:13,193 --> 00:03:14,318 Hi. 51 00:03:14,485 --> 00:03:17,654 Oh, yeah, I know. You're a chef, I know, and I thought of you first. 52 00:03:17,822 --> 00:03:21,200 But, um, Chandler's the one who needs a job right now, so... 53 00:03:23,286 --> 00:03:26,163 Yeah, I just don't have a lot of chefing experience. 54 00:03:26,497 --> 00:03:28,373 Unless it's an all-toast restaurant. 55 00:03:29,459 --> 00:03:32,461 - Yeah. Yeah. - Well, what kind of food is he looking for? 56 00:03:32,629 --> 00:03:35,631 He wants to do something eclectic, so he's looking for someone... 57 00:03:35,798 --> 00:03:37,799 ...who can, you know, create the entire menu. 58 00:03:37,967 --> 00:03:39,885 - Oh, my God. - Yeah, I know. 59 00:03:40,053 --> 00:03:41,678 So, what do you think? 60 00:03:43,306 --> 00:03:46,558 Thanks, Pheeb. I just don't really see myself in a big white hat. 61 00:03:46,726 --> 00:03:47,851 Okay. 62 00:03:49,771 --> 00:03:51,313 Oh, Monica. Guess what? 63 00:04:01,741 --> 00:04:03,909 Can you see my nipples through this shirt? 64 00:04:06,663 --> 00:04:09,748 No, but don't worry. I'm sure they're still there. 65 00:04:11,209 --> 00:04:12,709 Where you going, Mr. Suit-ey Man? 66 00:04:12,877 --> 00:04:15,879 Well, I have an appointment to see Dr. Robert Pilman... 67 00:04:16,047 --> 00:04:17,673 ...career counselor-a-go-go. 68 00:04:19,550 --> 00:04:21,218 I added the "a-go-go." 69 00:04:21,386 --> 00:04:22,761 Career counselor? 70 00:04:22,929 --> 00:04:25,931 Hey, you guys all know what you want to do. 71 00:04:26,099 --> 00:04:27,808 I don't. 72 00:04:27,976 --> 00:04:31,728 Hey, you guys in the living room all know what you want to do. 73 00:04:31,896 --> 00:04:34,147 You know, you have goals. You have dreams. 74 00:04:34,524 --> 00:04:35,649 I don't have a dream. 75 00:04:35,817 --> 00:04:39,236 Ah, the lesser known "I Don't Have a Dream" speech. 76 00:04:40,989 --> 00:04:43,699 Oh, I love my life. I love my life. 77 00:04:43,866 --> 00:04:45,701 Brian's Song. 78 00:04:48,246 --> 00:04:49,830 The meeting with that guy went great? 79 00:04:49,998 --> 00:04:52,874 So great. He showed me where the restaurant's gonna be. 80 00:04:53,042 --> 00:04:55,127 It's this cute little place on 10th Street. 81 00:04:55,295 --> 00:04:58,130 It's not too big, not too small. It's just right. 82 00:04:58,298 --> 00:05:01,383 Was it formerly owned by a blond woman and some bears? 83 00:05:02,427 --> 00:05:06,013 So anyway, I'm cooking dinner for him Monday night. Kind of like an audition. 84 00:05:06,180 --> 00:05:09,266 And Phoebe, he really wants you to be here, which will be great for me. 85 00:05:09,434 --> 00:05:10,809 Because you can make yummy noises. 86 00:05:11,019 --> 00:05:13,270 - What are you gonna make? - Yummy noises. 87 00:05:15,440 --> 00:05:17,607 And, Monica, what are you gonna make? 88 00:05:17,775 --> 00:05:20,319 I don't know. I don't know. It's just gotta be so great. 89 00:05:20,486 --> 00:05:22,779 Oh! I know what you can make. I know. 90 00:05:22,947 --> 00:05:25,824 Oh, you should make that thing, you know, with the stuff. 91 00:05:27,535 --> 00:05:31,455 You know that thing with the stuff? 92 00:05:32,540 --> 00:05:34,166 Okay, I don't know. 93 00:05:35,710 --> 00:05:38,170 Hey, guys, anyone know a good date place in the neighborhood? 94 00:05:38,338 --> 00:05:43,342 Uh, how about Tony's? If you can finish a 32-ounce steak, it's free. 95 00:05:45,636 --> 00:05:46,928 Okay. Ahem. 96 00:05:47,096 --> 00:05:50,223 Hey, does anyone know a good place if you're not dating a puma? 97 00:05:51,851 --> 00:05:54,811 - Who are you going out with? - Oh, is this the bug lady? 98 00:05:54,979 --> 00:05:57,606 [AS BUG LADY] I love you, Ross. 99 00:05:59,609 --> 00:06:01,526 Her name is Celia. She's not a bug lady. 100 00:06:01,694 --> 00:06:04,112 She's curator of insects at the museum. 101 00:06:05,656 --> 00:06:07,282 So, what are you guys gonna do? 102 00:06:07,450 --> 00:06:10,619 Well, I just thought we'd go to dinner, then bring her back to my place... 103 00:06:10,787 --> 00:06:13,330 ...and I'd introduce her to my monkey. 104 00:06:15,875 --> 00:06:17,834 And he's not speaking metaphorically. 105 00:06:20,880 --> 00:06:23,340 - So back to your place? - Uh-huh. 106 00:06:23,508 --> 00:06:25,509 You thinking maybe, heh-heh? 107 00:06:26,761 --> 00:06:30,180 Ahem, well, I don't know, heh-heh. 108 00:06:30,848 --> 00:06:32,766 I'm hoping heh-heh. 109 00:06:33,893 --> 00:06:36,144 I'm telling you, that monkey's a chick magnet. 110 00:06:36,312 --> 00:06:40,857 She's gonna one look at his furry, cute little face and it'll seal the deal. 111 00:06:43,027 --> 00:06:44,236 - Aah! ROSS: Celia, don't worry. 112 00:06:44,404 --> 00:06:47,864 Celia, he's not gonna hurt you. Soothing tones, Celia, soothing tones. 113 00:06:48,032 --> 00:06:49,825 - Okay, I'm sorry, I'm sorry. - Aah! 114 00:06:50,034 --> 00:06:53,870 - Here, here. Marcel? Marcel? - I can't stand this. 115 00:06:54,038 --> 00:06:57,374 - He's got his claws on my... - Yeah, all right. 116 00:07:05,049 --> 00:07:07,884 Okay, try this salmon mousse. 117 00:07:08,845 --> 00:07:10,762 - Mm. Good. MONICA: Yeah? 118 00:07:10,930 --> 00:07:13,390 Is it better than the other salmon mousse? 119 00:07:14,142 --> 00:07:15,684 It's creamier. 120 00:07:15,852 --> 00:07:18,019 Yeah? Well, is that better? 121 00:07:18,187 --> 00:07:21,606 I don't know. We're talking about whipped fish, Monica. 122 00:07:22,483 --> 00:07:24,818 I'm just happy I'm keeping it down, you know? 123 00:07:30,950 --> 00:07:32,617 God, what happened to you? 124 00:07:32,785 --> 00:07:35,704 Eight and a half hours of aptitude tests... 125 00:07:35,872 --> 00:07:40,333 ...intelligence tests, personality tests, and what do I learn? 126 00:07:40,918 --> 00:07:43,170 "You're ideally suited for a career in data processing... 127 00:07:43,337 --> 00:07:45,714 ...for a large multi-national corporation." 128 00:07:46,966 --> 00:07:50,385 That's so great, because you already know how to do that. 129 00:07:50,970 --> 00:07:52,804 Can you believe it? 130 00:07:52,972 --> 00:07:56,475 Don't I seem like somebody who should be doing something really cool? 131 00:07:56,642 --> 00:08:00,479 You know, I just always pictured myself doing something... 132 00:08:00,855 --> 00:08:02,147 Something. 133 00:08:02,315 --> 00:08:05,400 Oh, Chandler, I know, I know. 134 00:08:05,943 --> 00:08:09,154 Oh, hey, you can see your nipples through this shirt. 135 00:08:10,781 --> 00:08:11,948 [INAUDIBLE DIALOGUE] 136 00:08:13,367 --> 00:08:15,577 Here you go. Maybe this will cheer you up. 137 00:08:16,496 --> 00:08:19,247 Ooh, you know, um, I had a grape about five hours ago... 138 00:08:19,415 --> 00:08:20,832 ...so I better split this with you. 139 00:08:22,168 --> 00:08:24,920 It's supposed to be that small. It's a pre-appetizer. 140 00:08:25,087 --> 00:08:28,173 The French call it an amuse-bouche. 141 00:08:31,427 --> 00:08:33,762 Well, it is amusing. 142 00:08:35,473 --> 00:08:37,057 [PHONE RINGS] 143 00:08:40,353 --> 00:08:43,188 Hello? Oh, hi, Wendy. 144 00:08:43,356 --> 00:08:45,190 Yeah, 8:00. 145 00:08:45,691 --> 00:08:47,192 What did we say? Ten dollars an hour? 146 00:08:48,611 --> 00:08:49,861 Okay, great. 147 00:08:50,029 --> 00:08:52,155 All right, I'll see you then. Bye. 148 00:08:52,323 --> 00:08:53,907 Ten dollars an hour for what? 149 00:08:54,075 --> 00:08:56,618 I asked a waitress at work to help me out. 150 00:08:57,161 --> 00:08:58,662 Waitressing? 151 00:08:58,871 --> 00:09:00,288 Uh-oh. 152 00:09:01,249 --> 00:09:04,751 Ha, ha. Of course I thought of you. 153 00:09:04,919 --> 00:09:06,336 But... 154 00:09:06,504 --> 00:09:08,505 - But... - But, but? 155 00:09:10,299 --> 00:09:14,970 But, you see, it's just this night has to go just perfect, you know... 156 00:09:15,137 --> 00:09:19,349 ...and, well, Wendy's more of a professional waitress. 157 00:09:19,892 --> 00:09:21,351 Oh. 158 00:09:21,769 --> 00:09:24,396 I see. Yes. And I've sort of been maintaining my amateur status... 159 00:09:24,564 --> 00:09:26,565 ...so that I can waitress in the Olympics. 160 00:09:30,403 --> 00:09:34,823 You know, I don't mean to brag, but I waited tables at Innsbruck in '76. 161 00:09:39,036 --> 00:09:40,870 Amuse-bouche? 162 00:09:58,055 --> 00:09:59,556 Talk to me. 163 00:10:01,767 --> 00:10:05,687 Okay, uh, ahem, a weird thing happened to me on the train this morning... 164 00:10:05,855 --> 00:10:09,608 No, no, no. Talk dirty. 165 00:10:13,029 --> 00:10:16,239 - Wow. Here? - Come on. 166 00:10:16,407 --> 00:10:17,866 Come on. 167 00:10:18,034 --> 00:10:19,701 Say something... 168 00:10:19,869 --> 00:10:21,286 ...hot. 169 00:10:22,830 --> 00:10:24,581 - What? - Uh... 170 00:10:24,749 --> 00:10:27,083 - What? - Ooh. 171 00:10:27,251 --> 00:10:29,669 - What? - Um... 172 00:10:29,837 --> 00:10:31,129 What? 173 00:10:31,297 --> 00:10:33,131 - What? - Vulva. 174 00:10:40,181 --> 00:10:41,389 "Vulva"? 175 00:10:43,517 --> 00:10:45,810 All right, I panicked, all right? 176 00:10:45,978 --> 00:10:47,729 She took me by surprise. 177 00:10:47,897 --> 00:10:51,858 You know, but it wasn't a total loss. I mean, uh, we ended up cuddling. 178 00:10:52,026 --> 00:10:54,903 Whoa, you cuddled? How many times? 179 00:10:56,364 --> 00:10:58,531 Shut up. It was nice. I just... 180 00:10:58,699 --> 00:11:01,785 I just don't think I'm the dirty-talking kind of guy, you know? 181 00:11:01,952 --> 00:11:04,537 What's the big deal? Just say what you want to do to her. 182 00:11:04,705 --> 00:11:06,748 Or what you want her to do to you. 183 00:11:06,916 --> 00:11:09,959 Or what you think other people might be doing to each other. 184 00:11:10,503 --> 00:11:13,755 Look, I tell you what. Try something on me. 185 00:11:16,258 --> 00:11:17,884 Please be kidding. 186 00:11:20,429 --> 00:11:21,763 Why not? Come on. 187 00:11:21,931 --> 00:11:25,642 Just close your eyes and tell me what you'd like to be doing right now. 188 00:11:30,898 --> 00:11:32,774 Okay, I'm, uh... 189 00:11:33,150 --> 00:11:35,443 I'm in my apartment... 190 00:11:35,945 --> 00:11:36,945 Yeah, what else? 191 00:11:37,113 --> 00:11:39,906 That's it. You're not there. We're not having this conversation. 192 00:11:40,408 --> 00:11:42,492 - All right. Look, I'll start, okay? - Joey, please. 193 00:11:42,660 --> 00:11:45,078 Come on, come on. All right, ready? Look. 194 00:11:45,454 --> 00:11:47,205 Oh, Ross. 195 00:11:49,083 --> 00:11:53,253 You get me so hot, I want your lips on me now. 196 00:11:54,004 --> 00:11:55,422 See? 197 00:11:58,467 --> 00:12:01,720 - All right, now you say something. - I, uh... I really don't think so. 198 00:12:01,887 --> 00:12:03,263 Come on. 199 00:12:03,431 --> 00:12:04,889 - You like this woman, right? - Yeah. 200 00:12:05,057 --> 00:12:06,599 - You wanna see her again, right? - Sure. 201 00:12:06,767 --> 00:12:09,894 Well, if you can't talk dirty to me, how are you gonna talk dirty to her? 202 00:12:10,062 --> 00:12:12,439 Now tell me you want to caress my butt. 203 00:12:17,570 --> 00:12:19,571 Okay, turn around. 204 00:12:20,489 --> 00:12:22,907 I just don't want you staring at me when I'm doing this. 205 00:12:23,075 --> 00:12:25,869 All right, all right. I'm not looking. Go ahead. 206 00:12:26,036 --> 00:12:27,370 Okay. 207 00:12:29,457 --> 00:12:31,624 Ahem, I want, um... 208 00:12:31,792 --> 00:12:33,918 Okay, I want... 209 00:12:34,086 --> 00:12:35,336 ...to feel... 210 00:12:35,504 --> 00:12:38,548 ...your hot, soft skin with my lips. 211 00:12:38,716 --> 00:12:40,717 There you go. 212 00:12:41,343 --> 00:12:43,344 Keep going, keep going. 213 00:12:43,846 --> 00:12:45,346 I, uh... 214 00:12:48,017 --> 00:12:50,727 I want to take my tongue and... 215 00:12:58,444 --> 00:12:59,903 And... 216 00:13:00,070 --> 00:13:01,696 Say it. 217 00:13:04,658 --> 00:13:06,284 Say it! 218 00:13:07,077 --> 00:13:09,496 Run it all over your body... 219 00:13:12,166 --> 00:13:14,250 ...until you're trembling with... 220 00:13:33,687 --> 00:13:35,396 With? 221 00:13:37,441 --> 00:13:39,567 - Funny story. - You're not gonna believe this. 222 00:13:39,735 --> 00:13:41,152 It's okay. It's okay. 223 00:13:41,320 --> 00:13:44,697 I was always rooting for you two kids to get together. 224 00:13:46,575 --> 00:13:49,577 Hey, while you were sleeping, that guy from your old job called again. 225 00:13:49,745 --> 00:13:50,787 Oh. Again? 226 00:13:50,955 --> 00:13:53,540 - And again and again and again. - And again. 227 00:13:53,707 --> 00:13:55,375 [PHONE RINGS] 228 00:13:57,962 --> 00:14:00,046 Hello? Heh. And again. 229 00:14:00,214 --> 00:14:01,297 Ah. 230 00:14:01,465 --> 00:14:05,218 Hey, Mr. Costilick. How's life on the 15th floor? 231 00:14:06,345 --> 00:14:08,096 Yeah, I miss you too. 232 00:14:08,264 --> 00:14:12,392 Yeah, it's a lot less satisfying to steal pens from your own home, you know? 233 00:14:14,311 --> 00:14:15,562 Well, that's very generous. 234 00:14:16,021 --> 00:14:18,189 Uh, but look, this isn't about the money. 235 00:14:18,357 --> 00:14:20,400 You know? I need something that's more than a job. 236 00:14:20,568 --> 00:14:23,111 I need something I really care about... 237 00:14:23,279 --> 00:14:26,489 And that's on top of the year-end bonus structure you mentioned earlier? 238 00:14:26,657 --> 00:14:27,991 BOTH: Your dream. 239 00:14:28,158 --> 00:14:31,452 Look, Al. Al, I'm not playing hardball here, okay? 240 00:14:31,620 --> 00:14:34,831 This is not a negotiation. This is a rejection. 241 00:14:34,999 --> 00:14:36,833 No... No, no. No, no. 242 00:14:37,001 --> 00:14:38,585 No, stop saying numbers! 243 00:14:38,752 --> 00:14:42,297 I'm telling you, you've got the wrong guy! You got the wrong guy! 244 00:14:42,464 --> 00:14:43,965 I'll see you Monday! 245 00:14:47,553 --> 00:14:48,970 Ah. 246 00:14:56,061 --> 00:14:57,604 Huh? 247 00:14:57,771 --> 00:15:00,106 Wow. It's huge. 248 00:15:00,274 --> 00:15:02,650 It's so much bigger than the cubicle. 249 00:15:02,818 --> 00:15:05,945 Oh, this is a cube. 250 00:15:06,113 --> 00:15:07,780 Look at this. 251 00:15:09,491 --> 00:15:10,909 [GASPS] 252 00:15:11,285 --> 00:15:13,661 You have a window! 253 00:15:14,496 --> 00:15:15,830 Yes, indeedy. 254 00:15:15,998 --> 00:15:20,335 - With a beautiful view of... - Oh, look. That guy's peeing. 255 00:15:21,712 --> 00:15:24,923 Okay. That's enough of the view. All right, check this out. 256 00:15:25,090 --> 00:15:27,675 - Ahem. Okay, sit down here. Sit down. - Okay. 257 00:15:27,843 --> 00:15:29,969 Okay, this is great. This is great. 258 00:15:30,137 --> 00:15:32,430 - Ahem. You ready? - Yeah. 259 00:15:33,140 --> 00:15:35,350 Helen, could you come in here for a moment? 260 00:15:40,898 --> 00:15:42,315 Thank you, Helen, that'll be all. 261 00:15:44,860 --> 00:15:46,819 Last time I do that. I promise. 262 00:15:52,368 --> 00:15:54,202 Wendy, we had a deal. 263 00:15:54,370 --> 00:15:56,496 Yeah, you promised. 264 00:15:56,664 --> 00:15:59,290 Wendy. Wendy. Wendy! 265 00:15:59,458 --> 00:16:00,750 [GROANS] 266 00:16:03,587 --> 00:16:05,213 Hmm, who was that? 267 00:16:07,049 --> 00:16:10,218 Wendy bailed. I have no waitress. 268 00:16:11,971 --> 00:16:13,638 That's too bad. 269 00:16:14,390 --> 00:16:15,974 Bye-bye. 270 00:16:16,976 --> 00:16:18,559 - Ten dollars an hour. - Nope. 271 00:16:18,936 --> 00:16:20,061 Twelve dollars an hour. 272 00:16:20,521 --> 00:16:23,856 Mon, I wish I could, but I've made plans to walk around. 273 00:16:25,192 --> 00:16:28,319 You know, Rachel, when you ran out on your wedding, I was there for you. 274 00:16:28,487 --> 00:16:32,407 I put a roof over your head, and if that means nothing to you... 275 00:16:33,200 --> 00:16:35,034 Twenty dollars an hour. 276 00:16:36,370 --> 00:16:37,662 Done. 277 00:16:44,294 --> 00:16:46,170 - Well, hello. Welcome to Monica's. - Hello. 278 00:16:46,338 --> 00:16:47,964 May I take your coat? 279 00:16:51,468 --> 00:16:53,469 - Hi, Steve. - Hello, Monica. 280 00:16:53,637 --> 00:16:56,014 Hello, greeter girl. 281 00:16:56,473 --> 00:16:59,100 - This is Rachel. - Yeah, okay. 282 00:16:59,810 --> 00:17:03,271 Mm, everything smells so delicious. 283 00:17:03,439 --> 00:17:07,775 You know, I can't remember a time I smelled such a delicious combination of... 284 00:17:07,943 --> 00:17:09,485 Okay, smells. 285 00:17:10,738 --> 00:17:12,280 Well, it's a lovely apartment. 286 00:17:12,448 --> 00:17:15,074 Oh, thank you. Would you like a tour? 287 00:17:15,242 --> 00:17:18,077 I was just being polite, but all right. 288 00:17:20,205 --> 00:17:22,331 What? What's up? 289 00:17:22,499 --> 00:17:26,711 In the cab on the way over, Steve blazed up a doobie. 290 00:17:28,088 --> 00:17:29,464 What? 291 00:17:29,631 --> 00:17:32,216 Smoked a joint, you know? Lit a bone. Weed, hemp, ganja. 292 00:17:32,384 --> 00:17:33,718 Okay, okay, okay. 293 00:17:35,345 --> 00:17:38,097 Okay, I'm with you, Cheech. Okay. 294 00:17:39,224 --> 00:17:41,517 Is it dry in here? 295 00:17:44,563 --> 00:17:46,814 Let me get you some wine. 296 00:17:46,982 --> 00:17:49,650 Yeah, I think we're ready for our first course too. 297 00:17:50,194 --> 00:17:51,652 Okay... 298 00:17:52,654 --> 00:17:55,031 These are rock shrimp ravioli... 299 00:17:55,199 --> 00:17:57,366 ...in a cilantro ponzu sauce... - Oh. 300 00:17:57,534 --> 00:17:59,911 ...with just a touch of minced... 301 00:18:05,209 --> 00:18:06,417 ...ginger. 302 00:18:07,252 --> 00:18:09,670 Well, smack my ass and call me Judy. 303 00:18:13,509 --> 00:18:15,009 These are fantastic. 304 00:18:15,177 --> 00:18:17,804 Oh, gosh. I'm so glad you liked them. 305 00:18:17,971 --> 00:18:20,264 Like them? I could eat a hundred of them. 306 00:18:21,350 --> 00:18:23,392 Oh. Well, um... 307 00:18:23,560 --> 00:18:25,686 That's all there is of these... 308 00:18:25,854 --> 00:18:29,273 ...but in about eight and a half minutes, we'll be serving some delicious tartlets. 309 00:18:29,817 --> 00:18:31,442 "Tartlets"? Heh. 310 00:18:31,610 --> 00:18:35,905 "Tartlets." 311 00:18:37,741 --> 00:18:39,784 Word has lost all meaning. 312 00:18:46,083 --> 00:18:49,085 Excuse me. Can I help you with anything? 313 00:18:49,253 --> 00:18:51,671 You know, I don't know what I'm looking for. 314 00:19:08,063 --> 00:19:09,730 Oh, cool. Taco shells. 315 00:19:12,442 --> 00:19:15,862 You know, these are... They are like a little corn envelope, you know? 316 00:19:16,029 --> 00:19:18,656 You know what? You don't want to spoil your appetite. 317 00:19:18,824 --> 00:19:21,159 Hey. Sugar-O's. 318 00:19:21,326 --> 00:19:24,120 You know, if you just wait another six and a half minutes... 319 00:19:24,288 --> 00:19:26,998 Oh. Macaroni and cheese. We gotta make this. 320 00:19:32,379 --> 00:19:33,963 No, we don't. 321 00:19:34,673 --> 00:19:36,257 Oh, okay. 322 00:19:36,508 --> 00:19:38,593 Oh, sorry. 323 00:19:42,764 --> 00:19:45,057 Yeah, why don't you just have a seat here? 324 00:19:47,769 --> 00:19:49,228 Okay. 325 00:19:50,063 --> 00:19:52,106 Okay. Give me the Gummy Bears. 326 00:19:52,274 --> 00:19:54,567 Yeah, I... No. 327 00:19:56,737 --> 00:19:58,863 - Give them to me. - All right, we'll share. 328 00:19:59,031 --> 00:20:01,532 - No. Give me the bears. - Well, then you can't have any. 329 00:20:01,700 --> 00:20:03,409 - Give them to me. - This is not worth it. 330 00:20:03,577 --> 00:20:07,997 Oh, oh! Bears overboard. They're drowning. 331 00:20:08,749 --> 00:20:12,585 Hey, fellas. Grab onto a Sugar-O. Save yourselves. 332 00:20:12,753 --> 00:20:17,798 Help! Help! I'm drowning. Help! Help! 333 00:20:17,966 --> 00:20:19,592 That's it, okay? Dinner is over. 334 00:20:19,760 --> 00:20:20,927 - What? - "What"? 335 00:20:21,094 --> 00:20:22,511 - Why? MONICA: "Why"? 336 00:20:22,679 --> 00:20:25,097 I've waited seven years for an opportunity like this... 337 00:20:25,265 --> 00:20:28,559 ...and you can't even wait four and a half minutes for a stupid onion tartlet? 338 00:20:28,727 --> 00:20:29,936 [OVEN TIMER DINGS] 339 00:20:30,103 --> 00:20:31,520 Hey... 340 00:20:39,321 --> 00:20:40,947 What a tool. 341 00:20:41,949 --> 00:20:44,325 You don't want to work for a guy like that. 342 00:20:44,493 --> 00:20:48,621 I know. It's just... I don't know, I just thought that this was, you know, "it." 343 00:20:48,789 --> 00:20:50,748 Look, you'll get there. You're an amazing chef. 344 00:20:50,916 --> 00:20:53,709 Yeah, you know all those yummy noises? I wasn't faking. 345 00:20:57,297 --> 00:20:58,547 [CLEARS THROAT] 346 00:21:02,052 --> 00:21:04,387 So, uh, how did it go with Celia? 347 00:21:04,554 --> 00:21:07,848 Oh, uh, I was unbelievable. 348 00:21:08,016 --> 00:21:09,976 All right, Ross. 349 00:21:10,143 --> 00:21:13,187 I was the James Michener of dirty talk. 350 00:21:13,355 --> 00:21:15,856 It was the most elaborate filth you have ever heard. 351 00:21:16,024 --> 00:21:19,527 I mean, there were characters, plot lines... 352 00:21:19,695 --> 00:21:21,320 ...themes, a motif. 353 00:21:21,488 --> 00:21:24,240 At one point, there were villagers. 354 00:21:25,993 --> 00:21:27,660 Oh, and, uh... 355 00:21:28,829 --> 00:21:32,123 Well, um, you know, by the time we finished with all the dirty talk... 356 00:21:32,291 --> 00:21:34,875 ...it was kind of late and we were both exhausted, so... 357 00:21:35,043 --> 00:21:37,670 - You cuddled. - Yeah, which was nice. 358 00:21:38,130 --> 00:21:40,840 Do you guys want to try to catch a late movie or something? 359 00:21:41,174 --> 00:21:43,134 Maybe, but shouldn't we wait for Chandler? 360 00:21:43,844 --> 00:21:45,678 Whoa. Where the hell is he? 361 00:21:46,138 --> 00:21:48,180 Yes, Fran, I know what time it is... 362 00:21:48,348 --> 00:21:51,475 ...but I'm looking at the WENUS and I'm not happy. 363 00:21:52,728 --> 00:21:54,854 Oh, really? Well, let me tell you something. 364 00:21:55,022 --> 00:21:59,608 You will care about it because I care about it. Got it? Good! 365 00:22:02,612 --> 00:22:04,113 Whoa. 366 00:22:15,250 --> 00:22:17,084 - How's this? - Eek! 367 00:22:17,252 --> 00:22:19,462 - Sorry. How about over here? - Oh! 368 00:22:19,629 --> 00:22:21,589 See, now, that just means it's working. 369 00:22:21,757 --> 00:22:23,924 - Does this hurt? - No. 370 00:22:24,092 --> 00:22:26,594 - How about this? - Aah! 371 00:22:26,762 --> 00:22:27,970 There you go. 372 00:22:28,138 --> 00:22:29,597 [CONTINUES YELLING] 373 00:22:35,354 --> 00:22:36,354 Oh, I'm gonna throw up. 374 00:22:36,521 --> 00:22:38,272 [CONTINUES YELLING]27838

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