Original subtitles

- [sighs]

[air horn blares]

- I'M UP! I'M UP!

PLEASE, STOP THE NOISE!

STOP, PLEASE STOP! STOP!

- IT'S ALREADY 7:45.

- RIGHT, COOL.

ALL RIGHT, WHAT TIME IS YOUR FLIGHT?

- YOU'RE TAKING ME TO SCHOOL!

- RIGHT, COOL. LET ME PACK YOUR LUNCH.

- 3, 2, 1...

- THESE AREN'T MY KEYS.

- EVERY DAY, UNCLE VINNIE!

EVERY DAY, THE SAME THING.

YOU IGNORE YOUR ALARM,

I'M BARELY MAKING IT TO SCHOOL ON TIME,

AND I'M SICK OF IT.

ARE YOU ASLEEP?

- I'M UP! I'M UP.

WHAT TIME IS YOUR FLIGHT?

- FORGET IT. LET'S JUST GO.

- LOOK, WENDELL, I WAS UP LATE

HELPING MY AGE OF DESTRUCTION GUILD BECOME THE FIRST

TO TAKE DOWN A NEW BOSS, AND I LOST TRACK OF TIME,

BUT I'M HERE NOW, ALL RIGHT?

KEYS.

I'M GETTING THERE.

[quirky brass music]

*

- * I NEVER FELT SO GOOD

- * NEVER FELT SO GOOD

- * I NEVER FELT SO GOOD

- * NEVER FELT SO GOOD

- * SO WAIT A MINUTE

* HEY

* I NEVER FELT SO GOOD

- HEY, WATCH THIS.

I'M JUST GOING BY. JUST GOING BY--

NO, I'M NOT! I'M GOING IN!

[horn beeping]

- YOU CAN'T JUST CUT IN TO THE DROP-OFF LANE!

- AHA!

YEAH, GOOD MORNING TO YOU, TOO, SIR!

REALLY SHOULD WAVE WITH THE WHOLE HAND.

- ALL THESE PEOPLE MANAGED TO MAKE IT ON TIME

WITHOUT DRIVING LIKE MANIACS.

- YEAH, WELL STUDIES SHOW

AGGRESSIVE DRIVING IS ACTUALLY SAFER.

- NO STUDIES SHOW THAT.

- I KNOW WHAT'LL TURN YOUR FROWN UPSIDE DOWN.

[jaunty pop music]

- OH, NO, NO, NO.

NOT THIS SONG, NOT TODAY. I JUST CAN'T TAKE IT.

- WHOA, WHOA!

WHOA, I GOT TWO QUESTIONS FOR YOU, PAL.

ONE: WHY ARE YOU TOUCHING MY STEREO?

AND TWO:

* WHY DO YOU BUILD ME UP

* BUTTERCUP

* BABY, JUST TO LET ME DOWN?

I'M ALONE? ALL RIGHT, TWICE AS LOUD THEN.

* AND THEN WORST OF ALL

* YOU NEVER CALL, BABY

* WHEN YOU SAY YOU WILL

- THAT'S IT. I CAN WALK FROM HERE.

- NO!

* I NEED YOU

* MORE THAN ANYONE, DARLING

OH, MAN!

- UNCLE VINNIE, THIS DRIVE IS THE WORST PART OF MY DAY!

- IT'S NO PICNIC FOR ME EITHER.

YOU THINK I LIKE SITTING NEXT TO SOMEBODY

EATING HARD-BOILED EGGS WITH THE WINDOWS ROLLED UP?

- MAYBE WE SHOULD TAKE STEPS TO CHANGE THE SITUATION

IN A SERIOUS, LONG TERM WAY.

- WELL IT MAKES ME SAD TO HEAR YOU THAT,

BUT IF THAT'S WHAT YOU REALLY WANT, THEN...

* I'LL BE HOME *

* I'LL BE BESIDE THE PHONE *

* WAITING FOR YOU!

* HOO-OOH!

* HOO-OOH!

YEAH, I CAN GET YOU THE BLOODY T-SHIRT FROM DIE HARD,

BUT IT SOUNDS LIKE IT'S GONNA BE MORE

THAN YOU'RE WILLING TO SPEND.

WELL, YIPPIE-KI-YAY TO YOU, TOO, SIR.

- UNCLE VINNIE,

I HAVE GOT THE ANSWER TO OUR MORNING PROBLEM.

WE JOIN A CARPOOL!

I'VE GOT THE RULES AND APPLICATION RIGHT HERE.

YOU'D ONLY HAVE TO WAKE UP ONCE A WEEK,

AND BETTER YET,

I ONLY HAVE TO TRY TO WAKE YOU UP ONCE A WEEK!

THINK OF ALL THE MONEY WE'RE GONNA SAVE ON AIR HORNS!

- I HAVEN'T SEEN HIM THIS EXCITED SINCE WE GOT HIM

THAT NEIL DEGRASSE TYSON ACTION FIGURE.

- IT'S A WIN-WIN! THIS IS FANTASTIC!

I DON'T HAVE TO LISTEN TO YOUR NAGGING EVERY MORNING.

- AND I DON'T HAVE TO GET A TARDY

BECAUSE YOUR STUPID GUILD CAN'T TAKE DOWN A DRAGON.

- WELL, IF YOU HAVE A STRATEGY TO KILL A LEVEL-80 DRAGON

LIVING IN A POOL OF POISON, I'D LIKE TO HEAR IT.

- YOU COULD SACRIFICE A VIRGIN.

SURE YOUR GUILD HAS PLENTY OF THOSE.

- WE START TOMORROW.

BUT, YOU KNOW, THIS IS NOT AUTOMATIC.

IT'S A TRIAL RUN.

WE HAVE TO PROVE THAT WE CAN GET EVERYONE

THERE SAFELY AND ON TIME,

OR WE CAN KISS OUR BEAUTIFUL CARPOOL DREAM GOODBYE.

- I'LL DO ANYTHING NOT TO LISTEN

TO YOUR NYEH-NYEH-NYEH EVERY MORNING.

- YEAH, AND I'LL DO ANYTHING

NOT TO PUT UP WITH YOUR DOY-DOY-DOY-DOY...

- NYEH-NYEH-NYEH...

- DOY-DOY-DOY-DOY...

- NYEH-NYEH-NYEH!

- VINNIE THOUGHT IT WAS IMPORTANT

TO TEACH HIM A SECOND LANGUAGE.

- GUESS WHAT I FOUND IN MY TIZZLE.

- MY SODA.

IT'S A DIRTY BANDAGE.

- UGH!

THAT'S A TERRIBLE PRIZE.

- EVERYONE AT THE MARKET WAS LIKE, "BLORCH!"

IT'S DISGUSTING.

- WHOA, FOREIGN OBJECT IN YOUR FOOD

IN FRONT OF MULTIPLE WITNESSES?

OH, PLEASE LET ME REPRESENT YOU.

I MEAN, THIS IS A SLAM-DUNK LAWSUIT.

GOSH, WITH ANY LUCK, IT'S FULL OF HEPA--

OH, I DON'T WANT TO JINX IT!.

- LAWSUIT?

WHOA, SLOW DOWN.

I'M NOT LOOKING FOR ANY MONEY.

ALL I'M LOOKING FOR IS FOR SOMEONE

AT TIZZLE TO APOLOGIZE TO ME.

- FOR THE BANDAGE,

OR FOR MAKING A FLAVOR CALLED "JAMAICAN MOUTH FLUSH?"

- SHH. MACHINE.

COMPLAINT.

BANDAGE IN CAN.

- THIS IS NOT JUST ABOUT THE MONEY.

THIS IS ABOUT PROTECTING THE CONSUMER.

I MEAN, IF YOU CAVE,

WHAT'S TO PREVENT THEM FROM FILLING THEIR SODA WITH BEES?

- HELLO? OH!

HEY, LIVE PERSON.

I'M TARYN, AND I HATE TO BOTHER YOU,

BUT I HAVE A BIT COMPLAINT.

WHO AM I SPEAKING WITH? LUANNE?

- OH, MY GOD. SHE'S MAKING FRIENDS.

- LUANNE, TURNS OUT I FOUND A BANDAGE

IN MY CAN OF DIET TIZZLE.

[scoffs]

LIAR?

WHAT--

OH, NOW THAT IS JUST RUDE!

YOU KNOW WHAT?

I WASN'T PLANNING ON SUING, BUT NOW I AM,

AND IN CASE YOU'RE WONDERING HOW MAD I AM,

THIS IS ME HANGING UP WITHOUT SAYING GOODBYE.

GOODBYE!

UGH! I SAID GOODBYE.

[air horn blares]

- WHAT? YOU'RE UP?

BUT IT'S ONLY 7:00!

- YOU KNOW IT.

I EVEN GOT YOUR LUNCH PACKED AND EVERYTHING.

GRILLED VEGGIE PANINI, BANANA,

HARD BOILED EGG WITH A LITTLE MINI SALT SHAKER.

YOLO, SON.

YOU ONLY LUNCH ONCE.

AS MUCH AS YOU WANT THIS CARPOOL, I WANT IT MORE.

- OF COURSE.

YOU CAN SLEEP TILL NOON,

HAVE BREAKFAST, AND BE READY FOR YOUR 1:00 NAP.

- AND YOU CAN FIND THE CURE FOR CANCER

OR WHATEVER IT IS YOU DO SO EARLY IN THE MORNING.

KEYS.

- WILMA, WOULD YOU STOP BADGERING ME?

I THOUGHT YOU WERE MY LAWYER!

- WE NEED TO GET READY.

OH, WAIT. YOU'RE UP?

GUESS YOU WERE WRONG, WENDELL.

I DIDN'T NEED MY TASER.

- YOU WERE GOING TO LET HER TASE ME, BRO?

- PERFECT ATTENDANCE DOES NOT JUST HAPPEN.

- ALL RIGHT, TARYN, WE NEED TO PRACTICE.

- I DON'T NEED TO PRACTICE THE TRUTH.

- DO YOU KNOW HOW STUPID THAT SOUNDS?

ALL RIGHT, SIT.

[zapping]

SIT.

LET ME HEAR IT.

- OKAY, WELL, I WAS AT THE STORE,

AND I BOUGHT A CAN OF DIET TIZZLE,

AND WHEN I OPENED IT, THERE WAS A USED BANDAGE INSIDE.

- NO!

WE ARE SUING FOR STRESS AND PAIN INFLICTED.

I NEED TO SEE THAT.

WE ARE NOT LEAVING THERE WITHOUT JUSTICE...

IN THE FORM OF A CHECK.

- OKAY. I WAS AT THE STORE--

- WHAT, IF ANYTHING, WERE YOU MINDING?

- MINDING MY OWN BUSINESS,

AND I BOUGHT A CAN OF DIET TIZZLE.

- EXPECTING...

- EXPECTING NO BANDAGES TO BE IN IT.

- NO.

- EXPECTING LOTS OF BANDAGES?

- NO!

- EXPECTING REFRESHMENT!

- INTERESTING. GO ON.

- AND WHEN I OPENED THE CAN AND TOOK A SIP,

INSTEAD OF THE EXPECTED REFRESHMENT--

- TO YOUR HORROR--

- MY "HOR?"

- "HOR-ROR"

- TO MY-- TO MY HORROR!

MY HORROR! - YEAH.

- THERE WAS A DISGUSTING BANDAGE.

- A WHAT?

- A GASH GUARD!

- A WHAT?

- BACTERIA SPONGE!

- WHAT?

- WOUND SHROUD! WHAT DO YOU WANT FROM ME?

- I WANT YOU TO BREAK MY HEART!

- OKAY!

I OPENED A CAN OF DIET TIZZLE EXPECTING REFRESHMENT,

AND INSTEAD I GOT A DISGUSTING WOUND SHROUD!

AND I FELL TO MY KNEES,

AND I LOOKED UP AT THE UNCARING HEAVENS

AND I SCREAMED, "WHY?

WHY HAVE YOU DONE THIS TO ME?"

[sobbing]

- EH, CLOSE.

[doorbell rings]

- OH, MAKE A GOOD IMPRESSION.

FIX YOUR HAIR. - WHAT'S WRONG WITH MY HAIR?

- YOU LOOK LIKE A RENAISSANCE PEASANT.

COME DOWN HERE.

- WENDELL! WENDELL! CUT IT OUT!

I LIKE IT THIS WAY. IT'S COOL!

- WAIT, YOU'RE THE NEW CARPOOL GUYS?

- GOOD MORNING, CAMMIE.

AND, YES, WE'RE HERE TO TAKE YOUR CHILD...

- TO SCHOOL!

- YES. IMPORTANT DETAIL.

- I SPENT 20 HOURS IN LABOR WITH THIS GIRL.

WHY WOULD I HAND HER OVER TO TWO CONFIRMED IMBECILES?

- MOM, I KNOW I'M ADOPTED.

- DON'T LISTEN TO YOUR FATHER. HE KNOWS NOTHING.

- CAMMIE, I KNOW WE'VE HAD OUR DIFFERENCES IN THE PAST:

THE PARKING LOT, THE BOOK FAIR, INTERNATIONAL FOOD DAY.

- THAT FAJITA MEAT WAS LABELED "UNTAINTED" WHEN I BOUGHT IT.

- BUT WE ARE GOING TO DO EVERYTHING IN OUR POWER

TO PROVE OUR WORTHINESS DURING THIS PROBATIONARY PERIOD.

- AS YOU CAN SEE, I DON'T DRIVE THE BIGGEST CAR ON THE ROAD,

BUT SHE'S NIMBLE, AND SHE'S GOT A BOSS STEREO.

- OKAY, LISTEN TO ME, AND LISTEN GOOD.

- I BELIEVE IT'S "LISTEN WELL." - WENDELL.

- IF YOU ARE SO MUCH AS ONE SECOND LATE

WITH MY ONLY FLESH AND BLOOD--

- MOM! I'VE MET JOANNE.

- THAT WOMAN IS JUST A BLACK FRIEND

WHO STOPS BY ON YOUR BIRTHDAYS.

GET YOUR STUFF.

- NOT TO WORRY, MA'AM.

WE ARE READY FOR ANYTHING.

OUR MOTTO IS "EXPECT THE UNEXPECTED."

- BET YOU WEREN'T EXPECTING THAT, HUH?

MUSIC RUNS IN OUR FAMILY.

- I GIVE UP.

- IT'S NOT GOING TO WORK!

- SURE IT WILL.

PUT MY SURFBOARD ON HERE ALL THE TIME.

- A SURFBOARD HAS MORE SURFACE AREA IN RELATION TO ITS WEIGHT.

THAT INCREASES FRICTION AND AFFORDS MORE POINTS OF ADHESION.

- DON'T LOOK AT ME. I JUST DRAG A BOW ACROSS IT.

- IT'S PHYSICS.

SIR ISAAC NEWTON. - YEAH?

WELL, SIR ISAAC NEWTON HAS NOTHING

ON DR. THADDEUS G. TWINE.

LET'S GO!

[clattering]

- I'LL BE HONEST.

I MADE UP THADDEUS G. TWINE.

- MR. BASSETT, I REALLY GOTTA PEE.

- PLEASE BE CAREFUL, MR. BASSETT.

- SHE JUST HAD TO PICK THE UPRIGHT BASS.

WHAT ARE YOU, TOO GOOD FOR A HARMONICA?

GOES RIGHT IN YOUR POCKET.

- WAIT.

OKAY.

- MOVE, MOVE, MOVE...

[grunts]

[together] YES!

- WHOO! - OKAY, EVERYBODY, ALL ABOARD.

LET'S GO!

- WILMA, THANK YOU FOR SWITCHING CARS WITH ME.

SORRY ABOUT THE AIR FRESHENER

THAT SMELLS LIKE KNOCK-OFF DRAKKAR NOIR,

BUT THE SMELL IT'S COVERING UP IS MUCH WORSE.

- BRING IT BACK FULL.

DON'T TOUCH ANY BUTTONS,

AND DON'T CHANGE THE G.P.S. TO YODA'S VOICE.

ANNOYED ME, THAT DID.

- HEY, WE'RE LOSING PRECIOUS SECONDS.

LET'S GO!

- TARYN, GOOD LUCK. I BELIEVE IN YOU.

- AW, THANKS VINNIE!

- AW, MAN!

I HAD HER ALL MEAN AND CRANKY,

AND NOW SHE'S THE HAPPY HILLBILLY AGAIN.

- HEY! THAT IS VERY OFFENSIVE!

- YEAH!

YEAH, KEEP THAT SNARL, DAISY MAE.

- WHY ARE YOU STILL TALKING?!

YOU WANNA TALK NOW,

OR YOU WANNA SLEEP IN FOUR TIMES A WEEK?

- GUYS?

I SAID I HAD TO GO!

- YOU WANT SOME WATER OR SOMETHING?

- I'D LOVE A WATER. - YOU'RE NOT GONNA GET IT.

- WILL YOU STOP BEING SO MEAN TO ME?

I'M PLENTY MAD.

- HELLO. I'M MS. CLEMENTE.

- HELLO, I'M WILMA BASSETT, COUNSEL FOR MS...

WHAT'S YOUR LAST NAME?

- I KNOW WHO YOU ARE, MS. BASSETT,

AND I KNOW WHO MS. KLEINBERG IS.

- KLEINBERG? REALLY?

- MS. KLEINBERG, YOU HAVE HAD NO JOB,

NO MEANS OF SUPPORT OTHER THAN INFREQUENT ALIMONY PAYMENTS,

ISN'T THAT TRUE?

- WELL, I'VE JUST BEEN GETTING SETTLED IN A NEW CITY.

- THAT'S RIGHT.

SHE'S GOT TO DO THINGS

LIKE GET HER UTILITIES TURNED ON,

FIND A SYNAGOGUE,

'CAUSE THAT'S...

- LET'S CUT TO IT, SHALL WE, MS. KLEINBERG?

YOU SAW THE BILLS PILING UP, RENT COMING DUE,

MAYBE A CUTE LITTLE COCKTAIL DRESS IN A STORE WINDOW,

SO YOU WADDED UP AN ADHESIVE BANDAGE,

DROPPED IT IN YOUR TIZZLE, AND YOU GOT LAWYERED UP.

I THINK WE ALL KNOW THIS IS A SCAM,

AND WE'RE NOT GOING TO PAY.

- WELL, I THINK YOU ARE VERY RUDE,

AND I DON'T APPRECIATE BEING CALLED A LIAR.

- I THINK HER PEOPLE HAVE BEEN THROUGH ENOUGH.

RIGHT? 'CAUSE, I MEAN...

- MS. BASSETT, IS YOUR CLIENT AWARE

THAT PERJURY IS PUNISHABLE IN CALIFORNIA BY JAIL TIME?

- JAIL?

YOU'RE THR--

YOU'RE THREATENING ME WITH JAIL?

WILL YOU PLEASE DO SOMETHING?!

- DO WHAT?

SHE'S JUST THE SCARY GUARD DOG LAWYER

THAT'S BROUGHT IN TO TRY TO MAKE YOU RUN AWAY.

BUT SHE'S GOT NO TEETH,

SO YOU JUST WAIT UNTIL SHE'S DONE BARKING

AND SENDS IN THE LAWYER WHO CAN ACTUALLY MAKE THE DEAL.

WHEN DO YOU THINK THAT WILL BE, MS. CLEMENTE?

- [sighs]

SOMEONE WILL BE WITH YOU SHORTLY.

- OH, MS. CLEMENTE, ONE MORE THING.

BOOM.

WHAT-WHAT?

- UH, WHERE ARE YOU GOING? WE SHOULD BE GOING UP HIGHLAND.

- EVERYBODY TAKES HIGHLAND.

CAHUENGA'S BETTER.

- MY MOM TAKES HIGHLAND.

- YEAH, WELL SHE'S NOT HERE, IS SHE?!

LET'S TAKE A VOTE.

WHO THINKS WE SHOULD LET ME DO THE DRIVING?

- BOOM! THREE TO ONE.

I'M THE HERO.

- WAIT, THREE TO ONE?

THERE SHOULD BE FIVE OF US.

[tires screeching]

- THERE GOES MY HERO STATUS.

ALL RIGHT, BIG FIDDLE, HERE.

WEEZER, HERE. BRANIAC, HERE.

WHERE'S MUMBLES? WHERE'S MUMBLES?

- TOMMY! WE LOST TOMMY!

- ALL RIGHT, NOBODY PANIC!

- NOBODY PANIC!

- STOP SCREAMING!

- MY INHALER--[gasps] IS IN THE TINY CAR!

- THERE'S NO TIME, MIKEY!

WE'VE GOT TO FIND TOMMY'S BODY FIRST.

- FIND TOMMY!

HE'S FINE! I'M SURE HE'S FINE!

LOOK, EVERYBODY STAY CALM.

- NEVER GET OUT OF THE CAR!

NEVER GET OUT OF THE CAR!

- I HAVE TO SAY,

THAT WAS REALLY IMPRESSIVE THE WAY YOU HANDLED THAT.

- YEAH, YEAH, I'M GOOD.

SO, KLEINBERG?

IS THAT GERMAN?

- GOOD MORNING TO YOU, LADIES.

I'M REAL SORRY FOR HOLDING YOU UP,

BUT MY GRAND DAUGHTER JUST GOT A PUPPY,

AND BE DARNED IF SHE HASN'T ALREADY TAUGHT HIM A TRICK.

SHE TELLS HIM TO SIT,

AND HE JUMPS UP AND LICKS HER IN THE FACE.

- I LOVE HIM!

- NO, NO, NO, NO.

THIS IS THE GOOD COP.

THE OLDEST TRICK IN LAWYERING.

- I'M NORTON NEFFE,

AND I STARTED TIZZLE SODA 45 YEARS AGO,

SO IF WE'VE DONE SOMETHING WRONG,

IT'S IMPORTANT TO ME TO SET THINGS RIGHT.

- YEAH, SURE, AFTER YOU SIC YOUR LACKIES ON US

TO TRY TO SCARE US AWAY.

- WILMA!

- OH, SHE'S JUST DOING HER JOB, TARYN.

CAN I CALL YOU TARYN?

- NO, YOU MAY CALL HER MS. KLEINBERG,

DESPITE ALL EVIDENCE TO THE CONTRARY.

I MEAN, I JUST DON'T UNDERSTAND IT.

- BEFORE WE GO ANY FURTHER,

IN BEHALF OF THE TIZZLE SODA FAMILY,

WHAT HAPPENED TO YOU WAS WRONG,

AND I'M TRULY SORRY.

- OH, THANK YOU, NORTON.

THAT'S ALL I WANTED.

- NO, NO! STOP TALKING RIGHT NOW.

NO, WE ARE LOOKING FOR A SUBSTANTIAL SETTLEMENT

FOR PAIN AND SUFFERING.

- YOU KNOW WHAT?

A NICE FAT PAYOUT MIGHT BE JUST THE THING

TO WAKE THESE PEOPLE UP AROUND HERE.

- WELL, NOW I LOVE HIM. - NO, NO, NO.

ALL I WANTED FROM THE GET-GO WAS AN APOLOGY,

AND NOW I'VE GOTTEN ONE, SO I'M DONE.

IT WAS SO NICE MEETING YOU, NORTON.

- NO, NO. STOP!

HE SAID HE WAS GONNA GIVE US MONEY!

- I KNEW YOU WERE GOOD PEOPLE,

AND I CAN'T LET YOU LEAVE EMPTY-HANDED.

HERE'S SOME SANDWICHES I MADE.

CHICKEN SALAD ON TOAST.

- AND DON'T WORRY.

I CHECKED IT FOR BANDAGES.

- OH, THANK YOU, NORTON.

YOU'RE SUCH A NICE MAN.

- DAMN, YOU'RE GOOD.

HM. ARE THOSE LITTLE BITS OF PICKLE?

- STRAIGHT FROM MY GARDEN.

- OH, GIVE IT A REST, NEFFE.

- UH, TURN LEFT, OR WE'RE GONNA HIT TRAFFIC.

- I CAN'T TURN LEFT. IT'S WEDNESDAY.

THEY BLOCK OFF THAT STREET FOR A FARMER'S MARKET.

AH!

WHY CAN'T THEY BUY THEIR GROCERIES

AT THE GAS STATION LIKE NORMAL FOLKS?

- THAT'S IT. WE'RE DONE.

WE'RE GONNA BE LATE,

WE'LL GET KICKED OUT OF THE CARPOOL,

AND THEN WE'RE BACK TO AIR HORNS AND TASERS.

- NO.

[tires screech]

WE'VE COME TOO FAR.

COME ON. LET'S MAKE A RUN FOR IT!

- WHAT? NO, WE'LL NEVER MAKE IT!

- WENDELL, THIS IS NOT ABOUT YOU ANYMORE.

THIS IS ABOUT SOMETHING BIGGER.

THIS IS ABOUT ME.

GO, GO, GO, GO!

[grunts]

- DON'T DO IT.

- GET UP!

- EARN THIS!

- OH, COME ON.

- YAY! - WHOO-HOO!

- WE DID IT!

- WE'RE AT SCHOOL!

- BUMMER - YEAH.

- WELL, YOU DID IT, UNCLE VINNIE.

YOU GOT US HERE ON TIME, AND 90 SECONDS TO SPARE.

- YOU MEAN WE DID IT.

GOOD JOB.

- GOOD JOB TO YOU.

YOU NEVER GAVE UP.

- AND NEITHER DID YOU.

SO...

SAME TIME NEXT TUESDAY?

- YUP.

WE ONLY HAVE TO SPEND ONE MORNING A WEEK TOGETHER.

- ONE MORNING.

EVERYTHING WE WANTED.

- YEAH, IT'S PRETTY GREAT...

RIGHT?

[together] * WHY DO YOU BUILD ME UP?

- * BUILD ME UP

[together] * BUTTERCUP, BABY

* JUST TO LET ME DOWN?

- * LET ME DOWN

[together] * AND MESS ME AROUND

* AND THEN WORST OF ALL

- * WORST OF ALL

[together] * YOU NEVER CALL, BABY

* WHEN YOU SAY YOU WILL

- * SAY YOU WILL

[together] * BUT I LOVE YOU STILL

* I NEED YOU

- * I NEED YOU

[together] * MORE THAN ANYONE DARLING

* YOU KNOW THAT I HAVE FROM THE START *

- OKAY.

- * SO BUILD ME UP

- * BUILD ME UP

[together] * BUTTERCUP

* DON'T BREAK MY HEART *

- I JUST FEEL LIKE IF PEOPLE SAW ME

FOR WHO I REALLY WAS, THEY WOULDN'T LIKE ME.

- AW, COME ON NOW, WILMA.

YOU'RE PRETTY, YOU'RE SMART, AND WHAT'S MORE,

YOU'RE BEAUTIFUL ON THE INSIDE TOO.

- THAT'S REALLY SWEET OF YOU TO SAY THAT.

AND I CAN'T BELIEVE YOU HAVE ICE CREAM!

- I ALWAYS KEEP IT AROUND FOR MY GRANDDAUGHTER.

- AW...

CAN I BE YOUR GRANDDAUGHTER TOO?

- WHAT?

- WE COULD GO TO THE ZOO.

WE COULD GO TO THE PARK.

I'M FREE ALL DAY SATURDAY.

CAN WE? CAN WE?

- THAT GOT WEIRD REAL FAST.

- OH, DON'T GO GRANDPA NORTON!

CAN I CALL YOU THAT, GRANDPA NORTON?

- I'LL TELL YOU WHAT.

I'LL GIVE YOU A CHECK FOR $2,500

AND NEVER SEE YOU AGAIN.

- [huffs]

DONE.

NEVER LEAVE WITHOUT A CHECK.

BOOM.

WHAT-WHAT?