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1
00:00:24,791 --> 00:00:34,531
♪
2
00:00:34,568 --> 00:00:44,078
♪
3
00:00:44,111 --> 00:00:45,581
We here, niggas!
4
00:00:45,612 --> 00:00:47,452
�Aah!
�Aah!
5
00:00:47,481 --> 00:00:48,651
Wait, thats it?
6
00:00:48,682 --> 00:00:50,482
We aint gonna crash
into a wall or nothing?
7
00:00:52,152 --> 00:00:54,322
I told you, Cornell,
my family dont accept
8
00:00:54,354 --> 00:00:56,424
Drinking Debbie, and I dont
wanna hear they mouth.
9
00:00:56,456 --> 00:00:58,116
So, this weekend,
Im Debra,
10
00:00:58,158 --> 00:01:01,658
model of restraint,
civility, and sobriety.
11
00:01:01,695 --> 00:01:03,005
Unh�unh.
12
00:01:03,030 --> 00:01:04,360
What you say, bitch�nigga?
13
00:01:04,398 --> 00:01:06,568
I know you were looking
at me sideways.
14
00:01:06,600 --> 00:01:08,230
Ow! Aah!
15
00:01:10,337 --> 00:01:11,437
I cant believe Grandpa
rented this
16
00:01:11,471 --> 00:01:12,671
entire boat
for the weekend.
17
00:01:12,706 --> 00:01:14,006
You know how my father
likes doing
18
00:01:14,041 --> 00:01:15,681
all this extravagant�ass
[bleep]
19
00:01:15,709 --> 00:01:17,639
Now, remember �� your mother
hasnt had a drink
20
00:01:17,678 --> 00:01:20,748
in two whole days in order
to prepare for this occasion.
21
00:01:20,781 --> 00:01:22,221
Longer than that.
22
00:01:22,249 --> 00:01:24,049
Its been 2 days, 42 minutes,
and 47 seconds.
23
00:01:24,084 --> 00:01:25,554
But I mean, whos counting?
24
00:01:25,586 --> 00:01:28,616
Ooh, I heard they have
a Tupac hologram this year.
25
00:01:28,655 --> 00:01:30,155
I. D. s, please.
26
00:01:30,190 --> 00:01:31,560
Oh, no!
27
00:01:31,592 --> 00:01:33,262
I lose my I. D. underneath
the passenger seat,
28
00:01:33,293 --> 00:01:35,263
right next to the McDonalds cup
with a little Coke in it.
29
00:01:35,295 --> 00:01:37,955
KY, come with me
so you can hold my stuff.
30
00:01:37,998 --> 00:01:39,068
Barry Jelly.
31
00:01:39,099 --> 00:01:40,269
Debra Cakes.
32
00:01:40,300 --> 00:01:41,800
What a lovely name.
�Oh, wow.
33
00:01:41,835 --> 00:01:44,265
I usually dont normally get
compliments on my name.
34
00:01:44,304 --> 00:01:45,614
It does not matter,
35
00:01:45,639 --> 00:01:48,839
as long as you have
a healthy liver, right?
36
00:01:48,875 --> 00:01:50,605
[ Laughing ]
37
00:01:54,881 --> 00:01:57,781
Da [bleep]?
38
00:01:57,818 --> 00:02:00,688
Theres so many
I. D. s in this car.
39
00:02:00,721 --> 00:02:02,791
Hurry up.
The boats pulling away.
40
00:02:02,823 --> 00:02:04,493
[ Air horn blows ]
41
00:02:04,524 --> 00:02:05,694
Oh, no!
42
00:02:05,726 --> 00:02:07,486
How will we get to
the family reunion now?
43
00:02:07,527 --> 00:02:09,427
[ Crying ]
44
00:02:09,463 --> 00:02:12,103
[ Lightning striking ]
Huh?
45
00:02:15,769 --> 00:02:17,439
Oh, shit!
46
00:02:17,471 --> 00:02:20,271
Its Grammy�Award�winning
philanthropist DJ Khaled.
47
00:02:20,307 --> 00:02:22,807
Some people cant
handle success.
48
00:02:22,843 --> 00:02:25,613
I can.
I �� I can!
49
00:02:25,646 --> 00:02:27,076
What?!
I cant hear you!
50
00:02:27,114 --> 00:02:29,184
Yo, I cant hear you!
51
00:02:29,216 --> 00:02:30,446
I think hes saying
52
00:02:30,484 --> 00:02:32,594
hell take us there
on his jet ski.
53
00:02:32,619 --> 00:02:34,749
Thanks, DJ Khaled.
�Ha�ha!
54
00:02:34,788 --> 00:02:37,158
[ Air horn blows ]
55
00:02:37,190 --> 00:02:40,160
[ Indistinct conversations ]
56
00:02:43,363 --> 00:02:45,433
Hey, Junebug, there go
your baby Doo�Doo.
57
00:02:45,465 --> 00:02:48,125
Aw [bleep]
She with that lame�ass Barry.
58
00:02:48,168 --> 00:02:49,598
Hold on, yall.
59
00:02:49,636 --> 00:02:52,166
Is that my Debbie Cakes?
[ Smooch ]
60
00:02:52,205 --> 00:02:54,835
Boy, you done got big!
�Big as hell.
61
00:02:54,875 --> 00:02:57,585
�How old is you now?
�Old as hell.
62
00:02:57,611 --> 00:03:00,081
I remember when you was
in diapers drinking whiskey,
63
00:03:00,113 --> 00:03:01,783
shittin all over
the damn place.
64
00:03:01,815 --> 00:03:03,685
Yeah, there was shit
everywhere.
65
00:03:03,717 --> 00:03:05,387
�[ Clears throat ] Barry.
�Im like a ��
66
00:03:05,419 --> 00:03:07,149
Yeah, well,
it was good seeing you, Debbie,
67
00:03:07,187 --> 00:03:09,517
and I aint seen you
in so, so long.
68
00:03:09,556 --> 00:03:12,426
Oh, hey, everybody, lets get
a �� lets get a selfie.
69
00:03:12,459 --> 00:03:14,089
�Yeah.
�Not you, Barry.
70
00:03:14,127 --> 00:03:15,957
You take the picture.
71
00:03:15,996 --> 00:03:17,556
Ugh.
72
00:03:17,597 --> 00:03:21,197
Alright, Debbie,
holla at ya later.
73
00:03:21,234 --> 00:03:22,374
[ Clears throat ]
Barry.
74
00:03:22,402 --> 00:03:24,302
This might not be so bad
after all.
75
00:03:24,337 --> 00:03:26,107
Tisha: Well, well, well.
76
00:03:26,139 --> 00:03:28,139
If it isnt
Doo�Doo Debbie
77
00:03:28,175 --> 00:03:30,145
and her
telemarketer husband.
78
00:03:30,177 --> 00:03:34,777
Well, if it aint Ho�Ass
with a �� I mean, hello, Tisha.
79
00:03:34,815 --> 00:03:37,255
You remember Gary,
Richard, and Claudette.
80
00:03:37,284 --> 00:03:39,524
Richard is studying
to become a ballerina,
81
00:03:39,553 --> 00:03:44,263
and Claudette has a winning
personality that everyone likes.
82
00:03:44,291 --> 00:03:45,991
But you wouldnt know
nothing about that
83
00:03:46,026 --> 00:03:47,726
cause yous
a weak bitch.
84
00:03:47,761 --> 00:03:49,561
See, I know
what you tryin to do.
85
00:03:49,596 --> 00:03:51,326
You tryin to make me
feel a way.
86
00:03:51,364 --> 00:03:52,674
But we know the real.
87
00:03:52,699 --> 00:03:55,029
You just jelly because
you know Im the top bitch
88
00:03:55,068 --> 00:03:56,268
when it comes
to gettin low.
89
00:03:56,303 --> 00:03:57,873
Whatever you say,
Doo�Doo.
90
00:03:57,904 --> 00:03:58,914
The day you beat me
91
00:03:58,939 --> 00:04:00,439
is the day pirates
hijack this boat
92
00:04:00,474 --> 00:04:01,674
and put
a ferret in my ass.
93
00:04:01,708 --> 00:04:03,938
Put a ferret all up
in that ass!
94
00:04:03,977 --> 00:04:05,607
But you cant do this.
95
00:04:05,645 --> 00:04:07,075
Im concrete.
96
00:04:07,114 --> 00:04:09,254
�Oh!
�Oh!
97
00:04:09,282 --> 00:04:13,322
I have two words for you ��
watch and learn.
98
00:04:13,353 --> 00:04:14,423
�Look at that.
�Look at her go.
99
00:04:14,454 --> 00:04:16,624
�Oh!
�Oh!
100
00:04:16,656 --> 00:04:19,056
Yeah.
101
00:04:19,092 --> 00:04:20,392
She cheated!
102
00:04:20,427 --> 00:04:22,357
Ooh, she cheated!
Did anybody else see that?
103
00:04:22,395 --> 00:04:24,825
Oh, so what?
What are you gonna do?
104
00:04:24,865 --> 00:04:26,605
You gonna run to Daddy
and tell on me?
105
00:04:26,633 --> 00:04:28,103
Aint nobody gonna
tell on nobody.
106
00:04:28,135 --> 00:04:30,505
You just mad cause they always
liked me more than you.
107
00:04:30,537 --> 00:04:31,697
I never liked you.
108
00:04:31,738 --> 00:04:34,008
Mommy shouldve
swallowed you.
109
00:04:34,040 --> 00:04:35,170
[ Laughter ]
110
00:04:35,208 --> 00:04:36,678
Whats the matter,
Doo�Doo?
111
00:04:36,710 --> 00:04:40,450
[ Echoing ]
Does someone need a drink?
112
00:04:40,480 --> 00:04:42,520
Shes chokin!
113
00:04:42,549 --> 00:04:44,419
Somebody give her
mouth�to�mouth!
114
00:04:46,353 --> 00:04:47,393
Ugly�ass [bleep]
115
00:04:47,420 --> 00:04:48,860
She just wants me drinkin again
116
00:04:48,889 --> 00:04:51,059
so I make a fool of myself
in front of the fam.
117
00:04:51,091 --> 00:04:53,261
I dont care
what she thinks.
118
00:04:53,293 --> 00:04:55,833
�Hello?
�I know you hearin me.
119
00:04:57,798 --> 00:04:59,698
I know
you want me, Debbie.
120
00:04:59,733 --> 00:05:01,573
Stop pretendin
for these peckerwoods.
121
00:05:01,601 --> 00:05:04,141
I aint pretendin for nobody.
Im a bad bitch.
122
00:05:04,171 --> 00:05:05,611
You cant control me!
123
00:05:05,639 --> 00:05:07,139
Come taste of this.
124
00:05:07,174 --> 00:05:09,244
[ Thud! ]
[ Sighs ] Great.
125
00:05:09,276 --> 00:05:10,876
I bet thats Tishas ass
cheating her way
126
00:05:10,911 --> 00:05:12,581
through another
potato�sack race.
127
00:05:12,612 --> 00:05:14,352
[ Gunshots ]
Oh!
128
00:05:14,381 --> 00:05:16,321
Take me with you.
129
00:05:20,587 --> 00:05:22,287
�Ah!
�Aah!
130
00:05:22,322 --> 00:05:23,692
[ Crying ]
131
00:05:24,825 --> 00:05:25,865
Uh!
132
00:05:25,892 --> 00:05:29,402
Gary! Gary!
Help! The kids! Help!
133
00:05:29,429 --> 00:05:30,599
Bitch, please.
134
00:05:30,630 --> 00:05:32,870
Youre on your own.
135
00:05:32,899 --> 00:05:33,999
Yeah. Mm.
136
00:05:34,034 --> 00:05:36,374
Gary, welcome home.
137
00:05:36,403 --> 00:05:38,243
All: Aah!
Pirates!
138
00:05:38,271 --> 00:05:39,511
Do not call us "pirate".
139
00:05:39,539 --> 00:05:41,009
We find that offensive.
140
00:05:41,041 --> 00:05:44,311
You think cause were
terrorizing people on boats
141
00:05:44,344 --> 00:05:45,984
that makes us pirates?
No.
142
00:05:46,012 --> 00:05:48,352
Were just here
to harvest your organ.
143
00:05:48,381 --> 00:05:50,851
All: Aah!
Doctor pirates!
144
00:05:50,884 --> 00:05:51,884
Thats better.
145
00:05:51,918 --> 00:05:53,388
Word on street
is jellyfish organs
146
00:05:53,420 --> 00:05:54,920
are great on yellow market.
147
00:05:54,955 --> 00:05:57,495
Dont you mean
"black market"?
148
00:05:57,524 --> 00:05:59,534
�What I say?
�Uh, you said "yellow".
149
00:05:59,559 --> 00:06:01,059
Well, I meant "black".
150
00:06:01,094 --> 00:06:04,164
Now do what I say and give us
those goddamn organs.
151
00:06:04,197 --> 00:06:06,497
Aint nobody giving up
no organs.
152
00:06:06,533 --> 00:06:09,343
Ugh!
�You got a big mouth, bitch.
153
00:06:09,369 --> 00:06:12,309
Thats right.
Im the captain now.
154
00:06:12,339 --> 00:06:14,439
Aaah!
155
00:06:14,474 --> 00:06:16,484
Now tie
yourself up, bitch.
156
00:06:16,509 --> 00:06:18,509
Yes, sir.
157
00:06:19,512 --> 00:06:20,712
[ Air horn blows ]
158
00:06:20,747 --> 00:06:23,347
[ Whining ]
Wheres my parents?
159
00:06:27,387 --> 00:06:28,757
[ Scanner beeping ]
160
00:06:28,788 --> 00:06:31,588
You to the left,
you to the right.
161
00:06:33,727 --> 00:06:37,997
You, get over there with all
the other useless trash.
162
00:06:38,031 --> 00:06:40,301
Tisha? But you have
perfect organs.
163
00:06:40,333 --> 00:06:41,773
You have
perfect everything.
164
00:06:41,801 --> 00:06:42,841
I wish.
165
00:06:42,869 --> 00:06:44,999
Girl, my daughter ��
she got the personality
166
00:06:45,038 --> 00:06:47,408
of a [bleep] brick,
and my son ��
167
00:06:47,440 --> 00:06:49,810
he gonna be a virgin
till he 103,
168
00:06:49,843 --> 00:06:52,853
and my husband ��
he gay!
169
00:06:52,879 --> 00:06:54,579
Girl, he tried
to suck my [bleep]
170
00:06:54,614 --> 00:06:56,284
Damn, girl.
171
00:06:56,316 --> 00:06:57,846
You startin
to sound like me.
172
00:06:57,884 --> 00:06:59,294
Nah, bitch.
173
00:06:59,319 --> 00:07:02,589
You startin
to sound like me.
174
00:07:05,225 --> 00:07:07,865
Hold the goddamn phone away
from me to answer it.
175
00:07:07,894 --> 00:07:10,004
You drink?
�Please, like I could ever get
176
00:07:10,030 --> 00:07:12,200
through an episode
of "Scandal" without it.
177
00:07:12,232 --> 00:07:13,602
You watch "Scandal"?
178
00:07:13,633 --> 00:07:15,543
Bitch, what else
dont I know about you?
179
00:07:15,568 --> 00:07:18,668
Bitch, I watch "Scandal",
I drink [bleep]
180
00:07:18,705 --> 00:07:20,615
I got a RushCard.
181
00:07:20,640 --> 00:07:23,940
We got more in common
than you think, Debra.
182
00:07:23,977 --> 00:07:26,147
Um, this is my hair.
183
00:07:26,179 --> 00:07:29,019
Well, I guess you been
the perfect one all along.
184
00:07:29,049 --> 00:07:31,449
Im a closeted alcoholic
who gave up her dreams
185
00:07:31,484 --> 00:07:32,894
of becomin
a singer long ago.
186
00:07:32,919 --> 00:07:34,789
You got
a not�gay husband.
187
00:07:34,821 --> 00:07:36,961
You get to do whatever
the hell you want.
188
00:07:36,990 --> 00:07:39,630
You know, drinking might
have ruined our lives,
189
00:07:39,659 --> 00:07:41,759
but it also
saved our lives.
190
00:07:43,463 --> 00:07:45,603
[ Gasps ]
I got an idea.
191
00:07:45,632 --> 00:07:46,772
But Im gonna
need your help.
192
00:07:46,800 --> 00:07:49,100
You aint sayin
nothing, nigga.
193
00:07:49,135 --> 00:07:50,865
Put me in your mouth.
194
00:07:56,076 --> 00:07:57,406
Anyone seen Cornell?
195
00:07:57,444 --> 00:08:01,254
He about this tall, nice, uh,
pretty calves, no lips ��
196
00:08:01,281 --> 00:08:03,821
I aint talking about
the ones on his face.
197
00:08:03,850 --> 00:08:05,720
Well, since we all
gonna die,
198
00:08:05,752 --> 00:08:07,752
I got one last thing
to confess.
199
00:08:07,787 --> 00:08:09,217
I know.
You hate me.
200
00:08:09,255 --> 00:08:10,415
Oh, no, Barry.
201
00:08:10,457 --> 00:08:11,987
I dont hate you.
202
00:08:12,025 --> 00:08:13,535
I despise you!
203
00:08:13,560 --> 00:08:15,160
I wanna kill you!
204
00:08:15,195 --> 00:08:17,435
I cannot stand your ass!
205
00:08:17,464 --> 00:08:19,404
Let the organ
harvesting begin!
206
00:08:19,432 --> 00:08:21,572
Aaah!
207
00:08:21,601 --> 00:08:24,941
[ Feedback screeches ]
208
00:08:24,971 --> 00:08:27,371
What up, Dre?
Whats up, Snoop?
209
00:08:27,407 --> 00:08:29,277
Oh [bleep]!
Its Pac!
210
00:08:29,309 --> 00:08:30,739
This isnt happening!
211
00:08:30,777 --> 00:08:34,007
This isnt real!
This isnt real!
212
00:08:34,047 --> 00:08:35,777
Nigga, you dont
even like Tupac.
213
00:08:35,815 --> 00:08:37,615
I do like Tupac!
See?
214
00:08:37,650 --> 00:08:40,590
I have "Thug Life"
tatted on my ass.
215
00:08:40,620 --> 00:08:41,890
[ Microphone booms ]
216
00:08:41,921 --> 00:08:45,161
What the [bleep] is up,
Coachella?!
217
00:08:45,191 --> 00:08:46,431
[ Cheers and applause ]
218
00:08:46,459 --> 00:08:48,559
[ Liquid gurgling ]
219
00:08:52,766 --> 00:08:54,966
Hey, you remember that time...
220
00:08:55,001 --> 00:08:57,001
Hey, hey, hey, hey, hey!
[Bleep] the pirates!
221
00:08:57,037 --> 00:08:59,607
Oh!
[Bleep] pirates, you say?
222
00:08:59,639 --> 00:09:02,309
[ Warbling ]
223
00:09:02,342 --> 00:09:04,512
Aah!
Daddy!
224
00:09:04,544 --> 00:09:14,394
♪
225
00:09:14,421 --> 00:09:15,861
Barry, you next!
226
00:09:15,889 --> 00:09:18,119
�Wait, what?
�Hi�yah!
227
00:09:18,158 --> 00:09:21,558
I been holdin that one
for 17 years.
228
00:09:21,594 --> 00:09:22,804
Cornell: I think I see em,
229
00:09:22,829 --> 00:09:24,299
and it looks
like they in trouble.
230
00:09:25,698 --> 00:09:28,198
[ Dolphins squeaking ]
231
00:09:33,306 --> 00:09:34,636
Yo.
232
00:09:34,674 --> 00:09:36,684
[ Imitating dolphin sounds ]
233
00:09:36,709 --> 00:09:38,779
You aint got to speak dolphin
with me, homey.
234
00:09:38,812 --> 00:09:41,212
I speak English.
Get on my back.
235
00:09:44,084 --> 00:09:47,424
[ Screaming ]
236
00:09:47,454 --> 00:09:49,424
Aah!
237
00:09:49,456 --> 00:09:50,486
Let her go!
238
00:09:50,523 --> 00:09:52,963
Take me.
I gots nothing.
239
00:09:52,992 --> 00:09:54,632
I havent had
a dick in years,
240
00:09:54,661 --> 00:09:57,461
and I would love for a man
to hold me like that.
241
00:09:57,497 --> 00:10:01,497
If yall want this jellyfish
to live, we want...
242
00:10:01,534 --> 00:10:03,044
What do we want?
243
00:10:03,069 --> 00:10:05,669
We didnt make a hostage list?
244
00:10:05,705 --> 00:10:09,275
Alright, we want $15 million!
245
00:10:09,309 --> 00:10:11,779
[ Gunshots ]
246
00:10:11,811 --> 00:10:13,481
We the best!
247
00:10:13,513 --> 00:10:16,383
[ Cheering ]
248
00:10:16,416 --> 00:10:17,846
Tell my family
I love them.
249
00:10:17,884 --> 00:10:19,524
I wont let you down.
250
00:10:19,552 --> 00:10:21,722
�Cornell.
�Unky!
251
00:10:21,754 --> 00:10:24,164
Oh, come sit
on Unky lap.
252
00:10:24,190 --> 00:10:26,130
Ha ha!
Ooh.
253
00:10:26,159 --> 00:10:27,389
Dad?
Are you okay?
254
00:10:27,427 --> 00:10:29,697
Oh. Oh.
Oh, my God.
255
00:10:29,729 --> 00:10:32,899
Hey, um, you were really
great back there.
256
00:10:32,932 --> 00:10:34,272
All those years
of fighting,
257
00:10:34,300 --> 00:10:35,940
we could have been getting
drunk together.
258
00:10:35,969 --> 00:10:37,939
Girl, I hear theres an episode
of "Scandal" on tonight.
259
00:10:37,971 --> 00:10:39,811
You know, I really like you
260
00:10:39,839 --> 00:10:42,539
when you dont have something
stuck up your ass.
261
00:10:42,575 --> 00:10:45,135
Eh, oh, yeah.
I almost forgot.
262
00:10:45,178 --> 00:10:46,348
Aah!
263
00:10:46,379 --> 00:10:53,349
♪
264
00:10:53,386 --> 00:11:00,156
♪
265
00:11:00,193 --> 00:11:02,703
Hey, homey!
Thats my hot dog!
18087
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