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1
00:00:25,025 --> 00:00:32,025
♪
2
00:00:32,032 --> 00:00:39,042
♪
3
00:00:39,039 --> 00:00:45,849
♪
4
00:00:45,846 --> 00:00:49,046
In a victory for West Hollywood
locals today,
5
00:00:49,049 --> 00:00:51,579
Rhinestone Man
was finally caught after making
6
00:00:51,585 --> 00:00:53,645
numerous threats
at local restaurants.
7
00:00:53,654 --> 00:00:56,364
He was caught at a diner this
morning around 7 AM
8
00:00:56,356 --> 00:00:59,826
after making threats that, I
quote, "Im going to kill you.
9
00:00:59,826 --> 00:01:03,826
I have a gun. Im going to kill
you with a gun."
10
00:01:03,830 --> 00:01:05,970
We have footage of
the apprehension.
11
00:01:05,966 --> 00:01:10,066
[ Sirens chirping
in background ]
12
00:01:10,070 --> 00:01:13,570
Yall [ bleep ] aint never got
what I want!
13
00:01:13,574 --> 00:01:16,214
♪
14
00:01:19,012 --> 00:01:21,152
The mailman here.
15
00:01:21,148 --> 00:01:22,648
Huh?
16
00:01:22,649 --> 00:01:25,949
Nigga, the mailman here.
17
00:01:25,953 --> 00:01:29,393
What?
18
00:01:29,389 --> 00:01:31,259
Nigga, the mailman here.
19
00:01:31,258 --> 00:01:32,828
Aah!
20
00:01:34,895 --> 00:01:37,825
The mailmans here,
mother [bleep]!
21
00:01:37,831 --> 00:01:42,401
"The Mailman Is Here: Part 5"
22
00:01:42,402 --> 00:01:43,702
coming soon.
23
00:01:43,704 --> 00:01:45,514
Say sorry!
Nigga, I got a family.
24
00:01:45,505 --> 00:01:47,235
Say sorry!
25
00:01:47,240 --> 00:01:48,910
Got an envelope?
26
00:01:48,909 --> 00:01:50,739
I aint got no envelope,
but, baby,
27
00:01:50,744 --> 00:01:54,584
that Jasper Dolphin can lick my
ass and put me in a box!
28
00:01:54,581 --> 00:01:57,481
Uhhhh. What?!
I love "Part 5" movies.
29
00:01:57,484 --> 00:01:58,894
Daddy, can we go?
30
00:01:58,885 --> 00:02:00,845
Please, please, please, please,
please, please.
31
00:02:00,854 --> 00:02:04,694
No. Its a pretty bad storm
out there tonight.
32
00:02:04,691 --> 00:02:07,361
I think its safer for us to
just stay home.
33
00:02:07,361 --> 00:02:08,861
Please, please, please.
34
00:02:08,862 --> 00:02:11,232
Whoo! Barry!
I lost the power at my house.
35
00:02:11,231 --> 00:02:13,101
Now, I dont know what the
[bleep] yall was watching,
36
00:02:13,100 --> 00:02:15,340
but I know it aint better than
"Crohns Disease Wrestling."
37
00:02:15,335 --> 00:02:18,035
[ Bell dings ]
38
00:02:18,038 --> 00:02:20,768
[ Both groaning ]
39
00:02:20,774 --> 00:02:23,744
There you go!
Lock him up, nigga!
40
00:02:23,744 --> 00:02:25,854
Lock him up!
Thats what Im talkin bout.
41
00:02:25,846 --> 00:02:28,376
Chrons Wrestling looks like
some bullshit.
42
00:02:28,382 --> 00:02:31,992
Lets watch "Reginalds World."
Its the 13th season premiere.
43
00:02:31,985 --> 00:02:34,315
[ Applause ]
44
00:02:34,321 --> 00:02:37,221
Damn!
45
00:02:37,224 --> 00:02:38,764
Im late.
46
00:02:38,759 --> 00:02:40,529
You always late.
47
00:02:40,527 --> 00:02:42,297
You always [bleep] late.
48
00:02:42,295 --> 00:02:43,695
You always late.
49
00:02:43,697 --> 00:02:45,227
You always [bleep] late.
50
00:02:45,232 --> 00:02:48,472
Grow up. Grow up.
You always [bleep] late.
51
00:02:48,468 --> 00:02:50,198
You always
[bleep] late.
52
00:02:50,203 --> 00:02:52,513
What you got to say about
yourself?
53
00:02:52,506 --> 00:02:53,866
You always [bleep] late.
54
00:02:53,874 --> 00:02:55,514
Im sorry.
Im gonna show you.
55
00:02:55,509 --> 00:02:56,609
Im sorry.
56
00:02:56,610 --> 00:03:01,480
[ Laughter ]
57
00:03:01,481 --> 00:03:04,581
Come on, man.
Come on, man.
58
00:03:04,584 --> 00:03:07,394
Have you lost
your damn mind?
59
00:03:07,387 --> 00:03:09,157
Shhhh!
60
00:03:09,156 --> 00:03:10,416
Come on, man!
61
00:03:10,424 --> 00:03:12,494
Argh! Argh!
62
00:03:12,492 --> 00:03:18,632
[ Continues groaning ]
63
00:03:18,632 --> 00:03:20,332
That attacked me!
64
00:03:20,333 --> 00:03:30,243
♪
65
00:03:30,243 --> 00:03:35,053
♪ Amazing grace ♪
66
00:03:35,048 --> 00:03:39,988
♪ How sweet the sound ♪
67
00:03:39,986 --> 00:03:43,286
One in every four vacuum
comes and attacks a man.
68
00:03:43,290 --> 00:03:46,190
But it takes a real man
to worship a vacuum.
69
00:03:46,193 --> 00:03:48,563
Man: I know you!
70
00:03:48,562 --> 00:03:55,942
♪
71
00:03:55,936 --> 00:03:57,866
Those some nice jeans, man.
72
00:03:57,871 --> 00:04:00,071
Whered you get them?
They not for sale.
73
00:04:00,073 --> 00:04:01,983
I didnt ask you if they was
for sale.
74
00:04:01,975 --> 00:04:03,835
I asked where you got them.
75
00:04:03,844 --> 00:04:07,384
And I asked you,
they not for sale!
76
00:04:07,380 --> 00:04:12,790
♪
77
00:04:12,786 --> 00:04:15,756
[ Groans ]
78
00:04:15,756 --> 00:04:21,426
♪
79
00:04:21,428 --> 00:04:23,798
[ Laughter and applause ]
80
00:04:23,797 --> 00:04:26,427
[ Gasps ]
Those jeans!
81
00:04:26,433 --> 00:04:28,333
Yeah, they cool, right?
82
00:04:28,335 --> 00:04:30,335
Those are Lucius jeans.
83
00:04:30,337 --> 00:04:31,437
Ouch!
84
00:04:31,438 --> 00:04:34,708
You didnt just steal
anyones jeans.
85
00:04:34,708 --> 00:04:38,078
You didnt just kill
anyones turtle.
86
00:04:38,078 --> 00:04:41,408
♪
87
00:04:41,414 --> 00:04:46,394
You did these things to the
deadliest man on the planet...
88
00:04:46,386 --> 00:04:49,486
♪
89
00:04:49,489 --> 00:04:51,319
[ Hawk screams ]
Lucius.
90
00:04:51,324 --> 00:04:59,274
♪
91
00:04:59,266 --> 00:05:07,006
♪
92
00:05:07,007 --> 00:05:09,437
[ Grunts ]
H‐hey, guys.
93
00:05:09,442 --> 00:05:11,512
Sorry to interrupt,
but my shows on.
94
00:05:11,511 --> 00:05:12,881
[Bleep] your show, nigga!
95
00:05:12,879 --> 00:05:14,709
This is my homeboy daddy house.
96
00:05:14,714 --> 00:05:16,524
Thats right.
Its not your house,
97
00:05:16,516 --> 00:05:18,116
its none of yalls house.
98
00:05:18,118 --> 00:05:20,118
Now, get the [bleep]
out of here.
99
00:05:20,120 --> 00:05:22,190
Ha‐ha.
See, I told you.
100
00:05:22,189 --> 00:05:24,319
Thats why we watching my shit
tonight. On my ma‐‐
101
00:05:24,324 --> 00:05:25,464
Aah!
102
00:05:25,458 --> 00:05:27,358
See, yall play too much, man.
103
00:05:27,360 --> 00:05:28,760
I hate yall niggas.
104
00:05:28,762 --> 00:05:31,002
♪
105
00:05:30,997 --> 00:05:34,667
Aight, welcome back to
"The Bacherella."
106
00:05:34,668 --> 00:05:37,198
Last time we was on here,
Bones and D‐Rail
107
00:05:37,204 --> 00:05:40,574
were getting [bleep] kinky, dog,
at Mikes quinceañera.
108
00:05:40,574 --> 00:05:45,014
Lets take a look what happened
in the night.
109
00:05:45,011 --> 00:05:46,651
...and thats what Im sayin,
dude.
110
00:05:46,646 --> 00:05:49,776
Like, you know I aint mean to
shoot the whole spot up,
111
00:05:49,783 --> 00:05:51,783
but like ‐‐
112
00:05:51,785 --> 00:05:53,585
♪
113
00:05:53,587 --> 00:05:54,987
Yo, I aint gonna hold you.
114
00:05:54,988 --> 00:05:56,588
When Snake kissed me,
115
00:05:56,590 --> 00:06:01,030
guy has some of the craziest
tongue action I ever.
116
00:06:01,027 --> 00:06:04,257
Aw, man. I never win anything.
117
00:06:04,264 --> 00:06:08,034
Nigga, you was on the show.
How you just finding out now?
118
00:06:08,034 --> 00:06:11,704
Hey, Barry,
its a really bad storm ‐‐
119
00:06:11,705 --> 00:06:14,305
Bad storm. Yes we know, nigga.
Now, what you want to watch?!
120
00:06:14,307 --> 00:06:17,007
My soaps are on, man.
"Doctor Stain"!
121
00:06:17,010 --> 00:06:20,110
We need a nurse!
We need a nurse!
122
00:06:20,113 --> 00:06:22,353
[ Man groaning ]
We need a nurse!
123
00:06:22,349 --> 00:06:24,419
We need a nurse!
‐Im a doctor.
124
00:06:24,417 --> 00:06:26,447
He has Ebola.
125
00:06:26,453 --> 00:06:27,893
[Bleep]
126
00:06:27,888 --> 00:06:30,458
Not my nigga!
Not my nigga!
127
00:06:30,457 --> 00:06:32,087
How are you feeling?
128
00:06:32,092 --> 00:06:34,732
Lord, not my nigga!
129
00:06:34,728 --> 00:06:36,128
Im gonna need you to calm down.
130
00:06:36,129 --> 00:06:38,059
Well, Im a doctor, nigga.
What you need?
131
00:06:38,064 --> 00:06:39,474
Not my nigga, Lord.
132
00:06:39,466 --> 00:06:41,226
You all right, nigga?
Help my nigga!
133
00:06:41,234 --> 00:06:43,344
Whats goin on?
Help my ‐‐ he ate the taquito!
134
00:06:43,336 --> 00:06:44,796
All right, nigga.
We need a nurse!
135
00:06:44,804 --> 00:06:46,944
We need a nurse!
136
00:06:46,940 --> 00:06:48,840
He ate the taquitos!
137
00:06:48,842 --> 00:06:50,182
All right, nigga, this is what
we gonna do.
138
00:06:50,176 --> 00:06:51,606
Were gonna have to push this
one out.
139
00:06:51,611 --> 00:06:54,281
Its "Doctor Stain"!
140
00:06:54,281 --> 00:06:57,151
[Bleep]
Push it out, nigga.
141
00:06:57,150 --> 00:07:00,520
Not my nigga.
Not my nigga.
142
00:07:00,520 --> 00:07:02,290
Push it out.
Not my nigga.
143
00:07:02,289 --> 00:07:03,589
[ Squelching ]
144
00:07:03,590 --> 00:07:06,360
[ Groaning ]
145
00:07:06,359 --> 00:07:07,829
Not my nigga.
146
00:07:07,827 --> 00:07:09,157
He about to push this
[bleep] ‐‐
147
00:07:09,162 --> 00:07:11,302
[ Infant wailing ]
Dude, keep going.
148
00:07:11,298 --> 00:07:12,998
[Bleep]
Its all right.
149
00:07:12,999 --> 00:07:15,029
Jesus.
Its cool.
150
00:07:15,035 --> 00:07:19,035
Pray for these niggas...
I pray for these niggas, bro.
151
00:07:19,039 --> 00:07:21,239
[ Infant wailing ]
152
00:07:21,241 --> 00:07:25,951
Damn, thats a cute baby, nigga.
153
00:07:25,946 --> 00:07:29,116
Whats the baby name?
Can I kiss the baby?
154
00:07:29,115 --> 00:07:30,815
[ Smooching, audience cooing ]
155
00:07:30,817 --> 00:07:40,627
♪
156
00:07:40,627 --> 00:07:41,857
[ Static hissing ]
157
00:07:41,861 --> 00:07:43,601
Damn, that baby bitch
kind of sexy, nigga.
158
00:07:43,596 --> 00:07:46,166
Okay, hollup, hollup.
Look, I know theres a little
159
00:07:46,166 --> 00:07:49,236
Hurricane Katrina outside,
but this aint no FEMA camp.
160
00:07:49,235 --> 00:07:50,735
Hurricane Katrina?
Who is that?
161
00:07:50,737 --> 00:07:53,367
All I know is theres a real
strong storm outside.
162
00:07:53,373 --> 00:07:55,543
Well, too bad, cause yall got
to get the [bleep] out ‐‐
163
00:07:55,542 --> 00:07:58,912
...of here! Im not playing no
[bleep] games!
164
00:07:58,912 --> 00:08:01,152
If my son wants to watch
"Reginalds World,"
165
00:08:01,147 --> 00:08:04,347
hes gonna watch
"Reginalds World," bitch!
166
00:08:04,351 --> 00:08:07,091
[ All screaming ]
167
00:08:07,087 --> 00:08:09,157
Power outages.
168
00:08:09,155 --> 00:08:12,655
[ All screaming,
window shatters ]
169
00:08:12,659 --> 00:08:15,389
♪
170
00:08:15,395 --> 00:08:19,625
[ Sniffing ]
Ah. Ah. Ah, yeah.
171
00:08:19,632 --> 00:08:22,602
Ah, yeah. I can tell this may be
172
00:08:22,602 --> 00:08:24,702
a white BMW,
173
00:08:24,704 --> 00:08:27,574
maybe 2000, 2002?
174
00:08:27,574 --> 00:08:29,014
Hyunh!
175
00:08:29,009 --> 00:08:31,379
[ Screaming ]
176
00:08:31,378 --> 00:08:33,478
You said you loved me!
I do.
177
00:08:33,480 --> 00:08:35,210
You was my heart.
178
00:08:35,215 --> 00:08:36,945
I didnt mean for hurt you.
179
00:08:36,950 --> 00:08:38,750
You dont sleep with me no more!
180
00:08:38,752 --> 00:08:40,822
Babe, Im sorry.
181
00:08:40,820 --> 00:08:43,020
Sorry? Sorry?
182
00:08:43,023 --> 00:08:44,493
Im sorry!
183
00:08:44,491 --> 00:08:47,231
You said youre sorry.
You said youre sorry.
184
00:08:47,227 --> 00:08:49,857
I love you. I love you.
You said you were sorry, but I‐‐
185
00:08:49,863 --> 00:08:55,033
[ Screaming, blows landing ]
186
00:08:56,036 --> 00:08:58,696
Hey, everybody, stop.
187
00:08:58,705 --> 00:09:04,675
Stop! I have a very important
announcement to make.
188
00:09:04,677 --> 00:09:07,707
They bout to show
Stevie Wonders dick pics
189
00:09:07,714 --> 00:09:09,784
on BETMZ.
190
00:09:09,783 --> 00:09:13,223
[ Scattered cheers ]
191
00:09:13,219 --> 00:09:14,949
Im here for this.
192
00:09:14,954 --> 00:09:18,594
Mmm, my‐my, Imma kinda...
193
00:09:18,591 --> 00:09:20,031
♪ My cherie... ♪
194
00:09:20,026 --> 00:09:22,556
Hey, man, this remote
isnt working.
195
00:09:22,562 --> 00:09:24,702
Man:
Nigga, thats your cellphone.
196
00:09:24,697 --> 00:09:27,527
Ohh. Uh...
197
00:09:27,534 --> 00:09:30,404
Nigga, hold it,
hold the camera still, man!
198
00:09:30,403 --> 00:09:34,543
Hmmm. I guess I can take a
photograph of my...wee wee.
199
00:09:34,541 --> 00:09:37,111
Then get it on already then,
Goddamn it!
200
00:09:37,110 --> 00:09:39,780
Am I...
Am I gonna...?
201
00:09:39,779 --> 00:09:41,779
[ Shutter clicking ]
202
00:09:41,781 --> 00:09:43,621
He gonna get it right.
He gonna get it right.
203
00:09:43,616 --> 00:09:45,786
[ Muttering ]
204
00:09:45,785 --> 00:09:46,985
That aint it, nigga.
205
00:09:46,986 --> 00:09:49,556
Yo, your dick is down here.
206
00:09:49,556 --> 00:09:52,586
Oh, there it is.
Thank you. Thank you very much.
207
00:09:52,592 --> 00:09:54,092
Ah, yeah.
208
00:09:54,094 --> 00:09:56,134
Come on!
Come on. Come on.
209
00:09:56,129 --> 00:09:57,529
Come on, nigga, come ‐‐
210
00:09:57,530 --> 00:10:00,870
[ Thunder crashing ]
Aw, yeah‐‐
211
00:10:00,867 --> 00:10:02,937
Oh, man!
212
00:10:02,936 --> 00:10:04,696
Now well never see
213
00:10:04,704 --> 00:10:07,544
what Stevie Wonders dick
looks like!
214
00:10:07,540 --> 00:10:08,810
Well, neither will he.
215
00:10:08,808 --> 00:10:11,638
[ Laughter ]
216
00:10:11,644 --> 00:10:13,414
Shit, I seen it.
217
00:10:13,413 --> 00:10:16,783
Debbie, you cheated on me
with Stevie?
218
00:10:16,783 --> 00:10:18,683
All right, everyone stay.
219
00:10:18,685 --> 00:10:21,615
But Debbie, you get the [bleep]
out of here!
220
00:10:21,621 --> 00:10:23,791
Oh, my God, Barry.
This was before you.
221
00:10:23,790 --> 00:10:26,890
You about to be jealous of a
blind nigga with a big thickums?
222
00:10:26,893 --> 00:10:33,073
♪
223
00:10:33,066 --> 00:10:39,236
♪
224
00:10:39,239 --> 00:10:43,139
[ Conversing in alien language ]
225
00:10:43,143 --> 00:10:51,923
♪
226
00:10:51,918 --> 00:11:00,688
♪
227
00:11:00,693 --> 00:11:02,703
Eh, hemi, thats my hog dag!
228
00:11:02,695 --> 00:11:04,155
[ Laughs ]
229
00:11:04,164 --> 00:11:09,604
♪
15359
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