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1
00:00:04,765 --> 00:00:06,746
What are you doing
up here in Eve's room?
2
00:00:06,748 --> 00:00:09,259
What? I'm just taking some
of this old stuff down.
3
00:00:09,261 --> 00:00:12,089
What? Not the Peyton Manning poster.
4
00:00:12,091 --> 00:00:14,981
I come up here all the
time and look at that.
5
00:00:14,983 --> 00:00:17,306
It just reminds me of a time
when the Broncos didn't suck.
6
00:00:17,308 --> 00:00:19,284
Okay.
7
00:00:19,286 --> 00:00:21,569
Look, Eve doesn't
need this room anymore.
8
00:00:21,571 --> 00:00:24,030
She qualified for the
pilot training program.
9
00:00:24,032 --> 00:00:25,790
It's a ten-year commitment.
10
00:00:25,792 --> 00:00:28,951
And even Air Force pilots don't
need stuffed bears anymore.
11
00:00:28,953 --> 00:00:31,528
Well, we don't have
to change everything.
12
00:00:31,530 --> 00:00:35,283
Oh, honey, you have had a
month to think about this.
13
00:00:35,285 --> 00:00:36,701
That's enough time to grieve.
14
00:00:36,703 --> 00:00:39,128
You know, a lot of people
think you're the emotional one,
15
00:00:39,130 --> 00:00:40,789
but I think you're cold as ice.
16
00:00:42,542 --> 00:00:45,292
We're not using this
room for anything else.
17
00:00:45,294 --> 00:00:49,346
True. True, but, look, I
need it to be different.
18
00:00:49,346 --> 00:00:53,260
Uh, every time I walk by
this room, I burst into tears.
19
00:00:53,262 --> 00:00:56,659
It's-it's like my little
tomboy is-is all grown up,
20
00:00:56,661 --> 00:00:58,389
and now she's a...
21
00:00:58,391 --> 00:01:01,041
- Killing machine.
- What?
22
00:01:01,043 --> 00:01:03,930
A woman. A woman. Look, it...
23
00:01:03,932 --> 00:01:08,182
It just reminds me that this
phase in our lives is over.
24
00:01:09,440 --> 00:01:12,484
Give me Mrs. Huggy Pants.
25
00:01:16,348 --> 00:01:18,548
- Synced and corrected by Firefly -
- www.addic7ed.com -
26
00:01:20,989 --> 00:01:22,664
Mm.
27
00:01:26,430 --> 00:01:28,636
- Oh, hey. Wow, look at that.
- Hi.
28
00:01:28,638 --> 00:01:29,877
You guys are back early.
29
00:01:29,879 --> 00:01:31,686
Well, having Jen help me write the vlogs
30
00:01:31,688 --> 00:01:32,926
- has been very helpful to me.
- Yeah.
31
00:01:32,928 --> 00:01:35,321
- What's in the box?
- Huh? What box?
32
00:01:37,360 --> 00:01:39,226
It's pretty heavy, 'cause
your eyes are twitching.
33
00:01:39,228 --> 00:01:40,678
- Nope.
- So, it must be...
34
00:01:42,423 --> 00:01:44,740
- Mike.
- You're still moving stuff out of Eve's room?
35
00:01:44,742 --> 00:01:46,140
- Come on.
- Can you believe this, Jen?
36
00:01:46,142 --> 00:01:47,814
That you're upset about something?
37
00:01:47,816 --> 00:01:50,641
Yeah, I've seen it before.
38
00:01:50,643 --> 00:01:52,933
Look, Eve is fine with it.
39
00:01:52,935 --> 00:01:55,702
And maybe... maybe we can
use that as a guest room.
40
00:01:55,704 --> 00:01:57,071
Hell no. A guest room?
41
00:01:57,073 --> 00:01:59,139
That means we have to have guests.
42
00:01:59,141 --> 00:02:01,435
We're leaving the room the way it is.
43
00:02:01,437 --> 00:02:03,052
You know, if you don't
like what's in there,
44
00:02:03,054 --> 00:02:04,669
just shut the door, you
won't have to see it.
45
00:02:04,671 --> 00:02:08,010
No. No. Look, I-I just
want to make it comfortable
46
00:02:08,012 --> 00:02:10,400
for Jen's dad for-for graduation week.
47
00:02:10,402 --> 00:02:12,325
You don't need a guest room.
48
00:02:12,327 --> 00:02:13,945
My dad's not coming to graduation.
49
00:02:13,947 --> 00:02:16,948
He's not coming? Since when?
50
00:02:16,950 --> 00:02:19,643
He's so busy, I'd feel
terrible asking him.
51
00:02:19,645 --> 00:02:21,420
- Uh...
- You didn't even ask him?
52
00:02:21,422 --> 00:02:23,600
No. My dad would do anything for me,
53
00:02:23,602 --> 00:02:25,065
and I didn't want to pressure him.
54
00:02:25,067 --> 00:02:27,042
Well, if I were your dad,
I'd want to be here.
55
00:02:27,044 --> 00:02:28,985
Yes. I know that.
56
00:02:28,987 --> 00:02:31,054
It's what makes you awesome.
57
00:02:31,056 --> 00:02:33,498
You're the family who helped
me through high school.
58
00:02:33,500 --> 00:02:36,886
If you're there, that's
all I really need.
59
00:02:38,689 --> 00:02:41,031
We're all she really needs?
60
00:02:41,033 --> 00:02:44,651
So, she's no longer the exchange
student that lives with us.
61
00:02:44,653 --> 00:02:46,854
Now she's a child that we've stolen.
62
00:02:52,377 --> 00:02:54,369
Whoa, hey, hey, Kyle, Kyle.
63
00:02:54,371 --> 00:02:56,655
Kyle, check out this cool
thing my friend sent me.
64
00:02:56,657 --> 00:02:58,707
Oh, uh, we're on the clock, buddy.
65
00:02:58,709 --> 00:03:00,800
If, uh... if it's not work-related,
66
00:03:00,802 --> 00:03:02,886
it's gonna have to wait.
67
00:03:02,888 --> 00:03:05,080
Unless it's something really cool.
68
00:03:06,541 --> 00:03:08,751
You know what? I'll just come over.
69
00:03:09,720 --> 00:03:11,538
It's this audio clip
70
00:03:11,540 --> 00:03:14,030
that's been on the Internet
for the last couple of years.
71
00:03:14,032 --> 00:03:15,891
It's this guy saying this
one word over and over.
72
00:03:15,893 --> 00:03:17,519
Some people think he's saying "Laurel",
73
00:03:17,521 --> 00:03:19,553
and other people think
he's saying "Yanny".
74
00:03:19,555 --> 00:03:21,429
- What?
- No, no, no, no.
75
00:03:21,431 --> 00:03:23,456
I'll play it for you. Here it is.
76
00:03:23,458 --> 00:03:27,353
Laurel. Laurel. Laurel.
77
00:03:27,355 --> 00:03:29,468
Okay. Yeah, he's saying "Laurel".
78
00:03:29,470 --> 00:03:33,067
Well, yeah. No. I hear
"Yanny" clear as a bell.
79
00:03:34,337 --> 00:03:36,278
Is this a prank?
80
00:03:37,982 --> 00:03:40,449
Hey, hey, hey, guys. Yeah,
come-come-come over here.
81
00:03:40,451 --> 00:03:42,718
Tell me what word you hear.
82
00:03:42,720 --> 00:03:46,113
Laurel. Laurel. Laurel.
83
00:03:46,115 --> 00:03:47,580
Ah, this thing?
84
00:03:47,582 --> 00:03:49,783
It's "Laurel", end of story.
85
00:03:49,785 --> 00:03:51,210
Thank you, Kristin.
86
00:03:51,212 --> 00:03:52,347
What? "Laurel"?
87
00:03:52,349 --> 00:03:54,833
Are you nuts? It's saying "Yanny".
88
00:03:56,466 --> 00:03:57,958
Well, hey, let's see what Ed thinks.
89
00:03:57,960 --> 00:03:59,851
- Ed, Ed, what do you hear?
- Yeah.
90
00:03:59,853 --> 00:04:03,647
Laurel. Laurel. Laurel.
91
00:04:03,649 --> 00:04:07,059
Oh. I hear "Get back to work".
92
00:04:11,798 --> 00:04:15,276
I love these Dirty Harry movies.
93
00:04:15,278 --> 00:04:19,938
- Mm.
- "Go ahead. Make my day".
94
00:04:19,940 --> 00:04:22,682
Yeah, a lot of people think
Eastwood came up with that.
95
00:04:22,684 --> 00:04:24,051
Actually, it was me.
96
00:04:24,053 --> 00:04:27,259
Really? You coined the
Dirty Harry catchphrase?
97
00:04:27,261 --> 00:04:28,663
Not just that one.
98
00:04:28,665 --> 00:04:30,651
A lot of times I leave
work, and look at Ed,
99
00:04:30,653 --> 00:04:34,043
and I say, "I'll be back".
100
00:04:34,045 --> 00:04:36,226
And my favorite one of
all time is "More power".
101
00:04:36,228 --> 00:04:38,882
Oh, oh, oh, oh.
102
00:04:38,884 --> 00:04:42,590
Uh, Mike, the, uh...
the eagle has landed.
103
00:04:42,592 --> 00:04:44,696
That's another one, "The
Eagle has landed". One of mine.
104
00:04:44,698 --> 00:04:48,492
No, no, no. No, no, no. The,
uh, the eagle has landed.
105
00:04:48,494 --> 00:04:50,981
- Our eagle? Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.
- Yes.
106
00:04:50,983 --> 00:04:52,105
Can-can I tell her?
107
00:04:52,107 --> 00:04:53,912
- Yeah.
- Tell me what? Wait.
108
00:04:53,914 --> 00:04:57,280
Eagle? Jeep Eagle? You guys got me a car
109
00:04:57,282 --> 00:04:58,331
- for graduation...
- No, no. No, no.
110
00:04:58,333 --> 00:05:01,586
- ... and it's sitting in the driveway?!
- No. No, no, no. No, no. No.
111
00:05:01,588 --> 00:05:03,168
When have we ever done anything
112
00:05:03,170 --> 00:05:05,242
that makes you think
we're that generous?
113
00:05:05,244 --> 00:05:07,619
This surprise is better.
114
00:05:07,621 --> 00:05:10,197
It turns out your father isn't too busy,
115
00:05:10,199 --> 00:05:14,100
so we invited him to the
graduation, and now...
116
00:05:14,102 --> 00:05:15,760
He's here!
117
00:05:15,762 --> 00:05:17,187
What?
118
00:05:17,189 --> 00:05:19,637
Well, not "here" here.
He's-he's at the airport,
119
00:05:19,639 --> 00:05:21,631
probably near one of
those soft pretzel stands.
120
00:05:21,633 --> 00:05:22,821
- Oh, yeah.
- I should call him,
121
00:05:22,823 --> 00:05:25,195
and have him bring some for everybody.
122
00:05:25,197 --> 00:05:26,496
You knew we were awesome,
123
00:05:26,498 --> 00:05:28,523
but did you know we were this awesome?
124
00:05:28,525 --> 00:05:31,017
This is not awesome.
125
00:05:31,019 --> 00:05:33,295
Hey, what's-what's going on?
126
00:05:33,297 --> 00:05:35,547
Is everything okay with your dad?
127
00:05:35,549 --> 00:05:38,625
Oh, yeah. I love my
dad. I want to see him.
128
00:05:38,627 --> 00:05:40,735
Well, good, 'cause he
flew here from Hong Kong.
129
00:05:40,737 --> 00:05:42,971
I don't want to see his girlfriend.
130
00:05:42,973 --> 00:05:44,948
You don't know that he
brought his girlfriend.
131
00:05:44,950 --> 00:05:48,159
- He did, Mike.
- Okay.
132
00:05:48,161 --> 00:05:51,135
Great. Now you guys
get to meet the woman
133
00:05:51,137 --> 00:05:53,015
who wants to replace my mom.
134
00:05:53,017 --> 00:05:56,081
Well...
135
00:05:56,083 --> 00:05:57,514
Well, it's not gonna be easy,
136
00:05:57,516 --> 00:05:59,922
but we're gonna have
to get her a Jeep Eagle.
137
00:06:06,622 --> 00:06:08,180
Hey, Jen.
138
00:06:08,182 --> 00:06:11,491
Tell us about this girlfriend
that you don't like.
139
00:06:11,493 --> 00:06:12,868
I don't want to talk about it.
140
00:06:12,870 --> 00:06:14,519
I hope you can respect that.
141
00:06:14,521 --> 00:06:15,820
Yeah, of course we can.
142
00:06:15,822 --> 00:06:18,077
Yeah, you-you come and
tell us whenever you want.
143
00:06:18,079 --> 00:06:20,738
Like when the big hand is on now.
144
00:06:22,053 --> 00:06:24,278
Honey, we just want to know
what we're dealing with.
145
00:06:24,280 --> 00:06:26,531
You-you never mentioned that
your dad had a girlfriend.
146
00:06:26,533 --> 00:06:29,276
Well, he does.
147
00:06:29,278 --> 00:06:31,394
Fiona.
148
00:06:31,396 --> 00:06:35,115
All right, well, Fiona.
Come on, it's a lovely name.
149
00:06:35,117 --> 00:06:37,618
Not the way she says it.
150
00:06:37,620 --> 00:06:41,446
For years, she and
my dad were "friends",
151
00:06:41,448 --> 00:06:43,445
but when I was home last summer,
152
00:06:43,447 --> 00:06:46,755
my dad told me their
relationship had "progressed".
153
00:06:47,854 --> 00:06:51,126
- Okay...
- I often tell people that, uh,
154
00:06:51,128 --> 00:06:53,151
progress isn't always the best thing,
155
00:06:53,153 --> 00:06:56,979
but people don't listen, because
they're usually on their phones.
156
00:06:56,981 --> 00:06:59,452
They do everything together now.
157
00:06:59,454 --> 00:07:01,693
They got matching
pajamas this Christmas.
158
00:07:01,695 --> 00:07:03,187
Ugh!
159
00:07:04,496 --> 00:07:06,280
Kind of sorry I saw that.
160
00:07:07,741 --> 00:07:10,862
I have to look that guy in
the eye in two hours, it's...
161
00:07:10,864 --> 00:07:13,420
I don't know what he sees in her.
162
00:07:13,422 --> 00:07:15,520
She's nothing like my mother.
163
00:07:15,522 --> 00:07:19,554
My mom was sweet and
kind and thoughtful.
164
00:07:19,556 --> 00:07:21,237
We know, Jen. But, look, it's-it's just
165
00:07:21,239 --> 00:07:23,268
for a couple days. I'm
sure you can handle that.
166
00:07:23,270 --> 00:07:25,591
- I mean, look, she can't be any worse than Mike.
- Ha.
167
00:07:26,677 --> 00:07:28,731
It's not a contest, honey,
168
00:07:28,733 --> 00:07:30,725
but it's good to know I'm the bar.
169
00:07:34,084 --> 00:07:37,252
Hey, babe. Here is your left shoe.
170
00:07:37,254 --> 00:07:38,454
Oh, thank you.
171
00:07:40,361 --> 00:07:42,851
This morning, I put on a
brown one and a black one.
172
00:07:42,853 --> 00:07:45,581
I... I can't see my feet.
173
00:07:47,356 --> 00:07:50,473
So, I heard about this
whole Laurel and Yanny thing.
174
00:07:50,475 --> 00:07:52,847
You know, the reason why
you hear two different things
175
00:07:52,849 --> 00:07:56,354
is because they're recorded
in two different frequencies.
176
00:07:56,356 --> 00:08:00,021
So... which one did you hear?
177
00:08:00,023 --> 00:08:02,630
Kyle? We agreed not to talk about it.
178
00:08:02,632 --> 00:08:04,663
You're right.
179
00:08:04,665 --> 00:08:06,540
All right. Sorry.
180
00:08:06,542 --> 00:08:11,019
Yeah, but maybe he could break the tie.
181
00:08:11,021 --> 00:08:14,806
Yeah. Go ahead, honey. What do you hear?
182
00:08:19,072 --> 00:08:20,520
Yanny.
183
00:08:20,522 --> 00:08:21,580
- You fool!
- Whoo!
184
00:08:21,582 --> 00:08:23,874
Chuck, we finally win!
185
00:08:23,876 --> 00:08:26,943
Isn't this a pretty picture.
186
00:08:26,945 --> 00:08:31,314
My wife and my best friend
both hearing "Yanny".
187
00:08:31,316 --> 00:08:34,732
Come on, Kyle. Let's get
away from these Yannies.
188
00:08:34,734 --> 00:08:37,470
That is so childish.
189
00:08:37,472 --> 00:08:40,791
Oh, yeah? Well, Laurels
rule and Yannies drool!
190
00:08:44,244 --> 00:08:45,766
Yeah, actually, I heard Laurel;
191
00:08:45,768 --> 00:08:47,343
I just wanted to mess with my wife.
192
00:08:52,621 --> 00:08:54,693
Oh, this thing with Jen
just breaks my heart.
193
00:08:54,695 --> 00:08:57,170
You know, I know I didn't
like the idea of my mom
194
00:08:57,172 --> 00:08:58,488
in a new relationship, either.
195
00:08:58,490 --> 00:09:00,783
Is this about Ed?
He's a good stepfather.
196
00:09:00,785 --> 00:09:02,271
Remember the time he held your hand
197
00:09:02,273 --> 00:09:05,582
- and took you to the park?
- No, stop. Stop. No.
198
00:09:05,584 --> 00:09:07,271
No. Look, after my dad died,
199
00:09:07,273 --> 00:09:09,479
there was a new guy
buzzing around my mom...
200
00:09:09,481 --> 00:09:11,213
mowing the lawn, raking the leaves.
201
00:09:11,215 --> 00:09:13,231
He's called a gardener.
202
00:09:13,233 --> 00:09:15,152
You know, look.
203
00:09:15,154 --> 00:09:16,982
Look, i-if you ever wonder why
204
00:09:16,984 --> 00:09:20,555
I sometimes don't share things
with you, remember this moment.
205
00:09:20,557 --> 00:09:25,358
I got a welcome gift for Fiona,
but only because you made me.
206
00:09:25,360 --> 00:09:27,503
- Ooh, rose quartz.
- Yeah. Yeah.
207
00:09:27,505 --> 00:09:29,008
- Wow, it's beautiful.
- Good idea.
208
00:09:29,010 --> 00:09:31,237
I think it'll be good
to have in the room.
209
00:09:31,239 --> 00:09:35,220
It's said to calm feelings
of anger or resentment.
210
00:09:36,406 --> 00:09:38,373
Kind of like beer.
211
00:09:40,134 --> 00:09:41,657
The first two, not the last six.
212
00:09:41,659 --> 00:09:44,065
That's, that's just a black
eye and a police report.
213
00:09:44,067 --> 00:09:46,207
Oh, all right.
214
00:09:46,209 --> 00:09:47,990
- Okay.
- Okay. All right, good.
215
00:09:50,372 --> 00:09:53,088
- Pa!
- Ah-mui! Ah.
216
00:09:53,090 --> 00:09:55,682
- Hey, Henry. Welcome.
- Ah. Hi, Henry.
217
00:09:55,684 --> 00:09:57,217
- Oh, thanks for having us.
- Yes.
218
00:09:57,219 --> 00:09:59,571
I wouldn't miss Jen's
graduation for the world.
219
00:09:59,573 --> 00:10:01,882
Uh... oh, you must be Fiona.
220
00:10:01,884 --> 00:10:03,818
Yes, we-we are so glad you could come.
221
00:10:03,820 --> 00:10:06,716
- Oh, nice to meet you all.
- Yeah, Mike Baxter. Welcome.
222
00:10:06,718 --> 00:10:08,731
Told you you were overdressed.
223
00:10:08,733 --> 00:10:10,758
Everywhere we go,
you're like Elton John.
224
00:10:10,760 --> 00:10:12,619
Yeah, look at me.
225
00:10:12,621 --> 00:10:13,750
"Rocket Man".
226
00:10:13,752 --> 00:10:16,297
At least it's not matching pajamas.
227
00:10:16,299 --> 00:10:18,083
Yeah.
228
00:10:21,452 --> 00:10:24,186
I think you look nice, Dad.
229
00:10:29,042 --> 00:10:30,541
Uh, so, well,
230
00:10:30,543 --> 00:10:32,386
- let's not stand by the door all night.
- Yeah.
231
00:10:32,388 --> 00:10:34,670
- Come on into the living room.
- Come on. Come on in, sit down. Sit.
232
00:10:34,672 --> 00:10:38,163
- Okay.
- Oh. What a beautiful home.
233
00:10:38,165 --> 00:10:39,403
- Oh, thank you.
- Thank you.
234
00:10:39,405 --> 00:10:42,368
This one's sense of decor
is mid-century bowling alley.
235
00:10:44,169 --> 00:10:45,708
I like our apartment.
236
00:10:45,710 --> 00:10:47,161
So does she.
237
00:10:47,163 --> 00:10:49,155
Not as much as she likes bad jokes.
238
00:10:49,157 --> 00:10:51,180
Oh, it's not a joke.
239
00:10:51,182 --> 00:10:53,313
When you visit, he rents you shoes.
240
00:10:54,759 --> 00:10:56,912
That's funny. That is...
241
00:10:56,914 --> 00:10:59,280
Uh, you know who else is funny?
242
00:10:59,282 --> 00:11:00,847
Say something. Say something.
243
00:11:00,849 --> 00:11:03,434
Okay, okay, all right.
One of my favorite jokes.
244
00:11:03,436 --> 00:11:06,171
- The potato joke.
- No.
245
00:11:06,173 --> 00:11:09,989
Um, so, uh, w-we're so
glad you could be here.
246
00:11:09,991 --> 00:11:11,561
- Uh, h-how was your flight?
- Yeah.
247
00:11:11,563 --> 00:11:13,638
Well, I got a lot of exercise.
248
00:11:13,640 --> 00:11:15,215
- Yeah.
- Up, down, up, down.
249
00:11:15,217 --> 00:11:17,812
I mean, if you're gonna go
to the bathroom every hour,
250
00:11:17,814 --> 00:11:19,052
sit on the aisle.
251
00:11:21,647 --> 00:11:24,638
That's funny. You stick
him in the middle seat,
252
00:11:24,640 --> 00:11:26,923
then complain because
you have to get up.
253
00:11:26,925 --> 00:11:28,893
You could've just switched seats.
254
00:11:28,895 --> 00:11:31,519
Ha, ha, ha. See? I'm being funny, too.
255
00:11:32,856 --> 00:11:34,563
Uh...
256
00:11:34,565 --> 00:11:36,949
Jen, uh, dear, why don't you
come in the kitchen with me,
257
00:11:36,951 --> 00:11:38,159
help me fix some drinks?
258
00:11:38,161 --> 00:11:39,875
I think it's a good
time for the potato joke.
259
00:11:39,877 --> 00:11:42,544
- Two guys are...
- No. No, hey! No, no.
260
00:11:42,546 --> 00:11:44,488
Come, come with us.
261
00:11:44,490 --> 00:11:46,877
I'll stay here and make sure
Henry doesn't steal anything.
262
00:11:48,003 --> 00:11:51,103
Hey, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa.
263
00:11:51,105 --> 00:11:53,263
Well, the quartz thing didn't work.
264
00:11:53,265 --> 00:11:54,866
Looks like rocks aren't magic.
265
00:11:54,868 --> 00:11:56,701
I told you.
266
00:11:56,703 --> 00:11:58,575
- She's the worst person in the world.
- All right, look,
267
00:11:58,577 --> 00:12:00,237
I-I don't know if she's that bad.
268
00:12:00,239 --> 00:12:02,430
- All she does is put my father down.
- Hey.
269
00:12:02,432 --> 00:12:04,734
That's what couples do. I make
fun of Vanessa all the time.
270
00:12:04,736 --> 00:12:06,314
Yeah, and look, it doesn't bother me.
271
00:12:06,316 --> 00:12:07,666
And you know how you can tell?
272
00:12:07,668 --> 00:12:11,240
I make him dinner, and
yet he's still with us.
273
00:12:11,242 --> 00:12:14,126
I can't believe you both like her.
274
00:12:14,128 --> 00:12:15,881
Look, no, I just met the woman.
275
00:12:15,883 --> 00:12:18,422
Do I want to take a six-hour
car ride with her? No.
276
00:12:18,424 --> 00:12:19,648
Unless it's in a hearse.
277
00:12:19,650 --> 00:12:21,367
You're not helping.
278
00:12:21,369 --> 00:12:23,994
- I didn't say she was in the back.
- Oh, my God.
279
00:12:23,996 --> 00:12:26,737
Sunday is my graduation,
280
00:12:26,739 --> 00:12:28,297
and I don't want her here.
281
00:12:28,299 --> 00:12:30,452
Okay, look, Jen, Jen.
282
00:12:30,454 --> 00:12:33,620
You don't want the memory
of your graduation to be
283
00:12:33,622 --> 00:12:36,474
all about the blowup you had
with your father's girlfriend.
284
00:12:38,052 --> 00:12:39,768
- Okay.
- Good.
285
00:12:39,770 --> 00:12:42,396
Then can I get drunk?
286
00:12:42,398 --> 00:12:44,181
No.
287
00:12:44,183 --> 00:12:45,525
Right?
288
00:12:51,800 --> 00:12:53,830
Okay, hold on, but give me a minute.
289
00:12:53,832 --> 00:12:57,691
Um, then there's Zion,
uh, National Park,
290
00:12:57,693 --> 00:13:01,055
which is gorgeous, beautiful,
certainly worth seeing.
291
00:13:01,057 --> 00:13:03,414
And there you have
all the national parks
292
00:13:03,416 --> 00:13:05,044
in alphabetical order.
293
00:13:09,093 --> 00:13:12,818
Uh, uh, well, you know, I-I love cities.
294
00:13:12,820 --> 00:13:16,181
- Yes. Right.
- So, uh, I like to start with Akron, Ohio.
295
00:13:16,183 --> 00:13:18,794
I-I'd love to hear about it,
296
00:13:18,796 --> 00:13:21,194
but, uh, Fiona and I
are a little jet-lagged.
297
00:13:21,196 --> 00:13:22,595
- Oh, of course.
- Oh. Okay, all right.
298
00:13:22,597 --> 00:13:24,888
Uh, ah-mui, we'll talk tomorrow.
299
00:13:24,890 --> 00:13:27,197
Tomorrow? We didn't
even talk to her tonight.
300
00:13:27,199 --> 00:13:29,336
She's so quiet, this one.
301
00:13:29,338 --> 00:13:32,247
Oh, I can talk. I have a lot to say.
302
00:13:32,249 --> 00:13:35,130
All right, yeah, but they
already said their goodbyes,
303
00:13:35,132 --> 00:13:36,447
so we're just, we're gonna let them go.
304
00:13:36,449 --> 00:13:37,779
And maybe there's a better time for us
305
00:13:37,781 --> 00:13:39,029
to have this conversation, Jen.
306
00:13:39,031 --> 00:13:41,055
It won't take long.
307
00:13:41,057 --> 00:13:47,044
All I have to say is: why?
308
00:13:47,046 --> 00:13:49,305
I-I'll be right back.
309
00:13:49,307 --> 00:13:51,574
Yeah, u-uh...
310
00:13:51,576 --> 00:13:53,260
Uh, did... ?
311
00:13:59,646 --> 00:14:01,259
Uh, Mike, just...
312
00:14:01,261 --> 00:14:03,295
They're not swearing, so
I don't really understand
313
00:14:03,297 --> 00:14:05,139
what they're saying.
314
00:14:06,265 --> 00:14:07,937
I know what they're saying.
315
00:14:07,939 --> 00:14:09,938
Honey, go.
316
00:14:09,940 --> 00:14:11,548
- Tell her the potato joke.
- No, just...
317
00:14:18,654 --> 00:14:20,421
Excuse me, excuse me.
318
00:14:20,423 --> 00:14:22,890
I-I'll first say that
it's-it's a lovely language
319
00:14:22,892 --> 00:14:24,708
when you're arguing like that. It's...
320
00:14:24,710 --> 00:14:26,712
- We weren't arguing.
- Yes, we were.
321
00:14:26,714 --> 00:14:28,437
Well, now you are.
322
00:14:28,439 --> 00:14:32,258
Uh, J-Jen, would you
give us a minute, please?
323
00:14:32,260 --> 00:14:34,777
I want to talk to your
dad for a moment. Please?
324
00:14:34,779 --> 00:14:38,272
Fine. I'm going for a walk.
325
00:14:38,274 --> 00:14:39,423
Don't go far.
326
00:14:40,865 --> 00:14:43,388
- Listen, I...
- Sorry.
327
00:14:43,390 --> 00:14:45,655
She's complaining about Fiona.
328
00:14:45,657 --> 00:14:47,893
She doesn't understand
what I like about her.
329
00:14:47,895 --> 00:14:49,427
Well, I got to be honest,
I kind of wondered
330
00:14:49,429 --> 00:14:51,668
the same thing myself. I just...
331
00:14:51,670 --> 00:14:55,222
Yes, I know, Fiona
has a big personality.
332
00:14:55,224 --> 00:14:56,757
It's just what I needed.
333
00:14:56,759 --> 00:15:00,352
Just, I-I've never really
needed to get my balls busted.
334
00:15:02,607 --> 00:15:04,415
But I-I got to be honest,
335
00:15:04,417 --> 00:15:07,093
I-I don't think this
is just about Fiona.
336
00:15:07,095 --> 00:15:08,727
Eh, I don't, either.
337
00:15:08,729 --> 00:15:13,298
Jen wants things to stay
the way they used to be.
338
00:15:13,300 --> 00:15:14,917
- But they don't.
- No, no.
339
00:15:14,919 --> 00:15:18,138
It's okay for her to go
forward with her life,
340
00:15:18,140 --> 00:15:19,963
but she doesn't want me to move on.
341
00:15:19,965 --> 00:15:21,957
Y-You understand. You have daughters.
342
00:15:21,959 --> 00:15:25,611
Yeah, I've got, uh, two
married daughters and, uh...
343
00:15:25,613 --> 00:15:28,781
and my, uh, y-youngest is, um, Eve.
344
00:15:28,783 --> 00:15:31,702
- Mm.
- She's in, uh, Air Force Academy.
345
00:15:31,704 --> 00:15:34,236
Well, while Eve is away,
I'm sure she doesn't want
346
00:15:34,238 --> 00:15:36,772
things here at home to change, either.
347
00:15:36,774 --> 00:15:38,456
Yes.
348
00:15:38,458 --> 00:15:41,444
There has been some resistance
around here about that.
349
00:15:42,396 --> 00:15:44,488
So you understand.
350
00:15:46,058 --> 00:15:49,994
Yeah. Yeah, yeah, I-I understand.
351
00:16:02,282 --> 00:16:05,993
Really? You're not even
gonna say good morning?
352
00:16:05,995 --> 00:16:09,429
Why should I? I don't
know what you people hear.
353
00:16:10,758 --> 00:16:12,383
Just drop it, Kyle.
354
00:16:12,385 --> 00:16:13,726
No, it's no big deal.
355
00:16:13,728 --> 00:16:18,247
All I'm saying is I don't know you!
356
00:16:18,249 --> 00:16:20,616
- Hey, Kristin.
- Hey, Kyle.
357
00:16:20,618 --> 00:16:22,693
Oh, I see you two are
on a first-name basis.
358
00:16:23,956 --> 00:16:27,089
Oh, so you can you hear that,
but you don't hear Laurel?
359
00:16:27,091 --> 00:16:28,881
- No, I hear Yanny.
- Laurel.
360
00:16:28,883 --> 00:16:30,766
- Yanny. Yanny.
- Laurel. Laurel. Laurel.
361
00:16:30,768 --> 00:16:32,394
Hold on, hold on, hold on, hold on.
362
00:16:32,396 --> 00:16:34,396
I want to say something here.
363
00:16:34,398 --> 00:16:36,790
Yanny, Yanny, Yanny, Yanny, Yanny!
364
00:16:38,920 --> 00:16:41,820
Time-out, time-out.
365
00:16:41,822 --> 00:16:45,849
I got a recording of my own
I want you all to listen to.
366
00:16:45,851 --> 00:16:48,525
Just let me know what you hear. Tell me.
367
00:16:53,000 --> 00:16:55,225
I can't really make anything out.
368
00:16:55,227 --> 00:16:56,927
It sounds like a bunch
of people at a party.
369
00:16:56,929 --> 00:16:58,503
Yeah, w-what is this thing, Ed?
370
00:16:58,505 --> 00:17:01,023
It's you knuckleheads
hanging out last week.
371
00:17:03,093 --> 00:17:07,045
- Sounds like we were having a really good time.
- You were.
372
00:17:07,047 --> 00:17:10,881
And then we let all this
Laurel-Yanny stuff split us up.
373
00:17:10,883 --> 00:17:14,815
You did. See, "out there"
everybody's always fighting.
374
00:17:14,817 --> 00:17:18,648
They're, I mean, they're looking
for things to fight about.
375
00:17:18,650 --> 00:17:20,751
I don't want that in here, folks.
376
00:17:22,130 --> 00:17:24,121
I-I don't, either.
377
00:17:24,123 --> 00:17:26,857
From now on,
378
00:17:26,859 --> 00:17:29,935
let's not talk about
things that separate us.
379
00:17:29,937 --> 00:17:33,123
Agreed. Let's just stick
to politics and religion.
380
00:17:39,369 --> 00:17:41,175
Did you finally cave
381
00:17:41,177 --> 00:17:43,682
and agree to let Vanessa
change Eve's room?
382
00:17:43,684 --> 00:17:47,194
No, actually, we've
invited Fiona to move in.
383
00:17:49,440 --> 00:17:51,565
Ha, ha.
384
00:17:51,567 --> 00:17:53,701
I miss Eve.
385
00:17:56,655 --> 00:18:01,124
But I don't think she's moving back.
386
00:18:01,126 --> 00:18:05,975
I just have to accept the
fact that things change.
387
00:18:05,977 --> 00:18:08,242
Wow. The way you were acting,
388
00:18:08,244 --> 00:18:10,217
I didn't think you
would ever accept that.
389
00:18:10,219 --> 00:18:11,993
Well...
390
00:18:11,995 --> 00:18:14,108
I'm having a little
difficulty moving on.
391
00:18:14,110 --> 00:18:16,732
Uh, it's probably my age.
392
00:18:16,734 --> 00:18:21,595
More likely, 'cause I loved
the way things used to be.
393
00:18:21,597 --> 00:18:24,690
I've got to learn to make
the best of it, you know?
394
00:18:26,544 --> 00:18:29,028
It's not like I have a choice.
395
00:18:31,082 --> 00:18:33,449
I get it. You're talking about me, too.
396
00:18:33,451 --> 00:18:35,426
But maybe I don't want to move on.
397
00:18:35,428 --> 00:18:38,411
I'm not talking about you.
I was talking about your dad.
398
00:18:38,413 --> 00:18:39,763
You know, he wants to move on.
399
00:18:39,765 --> 00:18:42,124
He's having a hard time,
and I understand that.
400
00:18:44,170 --> 00:18:46,879
And do you want to
make it harder for him?
401
00:18:52,712 --> 00:18:55,404
You want some help?
402
00:18:55,406 --> 00:18:56,630
Sure, that'd be great.
403
00:18:56,632 --> 00:18:58,598
Um, just pack her sweaters up.
404
00:18:58,600 --> 00:19:01,327
There's two boxes over there.
405
00:19:01,329 --> 00:19:04,930
Mike Baxter here for Outdoor
Man talking about change.
406
00:19:04,932 --> 00:19:08,642
Now, nature is full of change.
Sometimes that change is good.
407
00:19:08,644 --> 00:19:10,776
A caterpillar goes into a slimy cocoon
408
00:19:10,778 --> 00:19:12,596
and emerges a gorgeous butterfly.
409
00:19:12,598 --> 00:19:15,649
On the other hand, some
change is, well, hard.
410
00:19:15,651 --> 00:19:18,778
When a bear cub says
goodbye to the cave,
411
00:19:18,780 --> 00:19:21,136
he leaves behind two
very sad bear parents
412
00:19:21,138 --> 00:19:23,013
who feel like they have
nothing left in life,
413
00:19:23,015 --> 00:19:25,267
except selling toilet paper...
414
00:19:25,269 --> 00:19:27,086
and mauling campers.
415
00:19:28,764 --> 00:19:31,277
But there's two ways
of looking at change.
416
00:19:31,279 --> 00:19:33,902
You can either focus
on what you're losing,
417
00:19:33,904 --> 00:19:36,430
or celebrate what you're gaining.
418
00:19:38,065 --> 00:19:41,008
To quote the novelist Hermann Hesse,
419
00:19:41,010 --> 00:19:43,668
"Some of us think holding
on makes us strong,
420
00:19:43,670 --> 00:19:46,497
but sometimes it is letting go".
421
00:19:46,499 --> 00:19:51,485
Great advice for life, bad
advice if you're rock climbing.
422
00:19:55,216 --> 00:19:58,801
My advice for dealing with
change? Take baby steps.
423
00:19:58,803 --> 00:20:01,321
Like, maybe you used to go
camping with your family
424
00:20:01,323 --> 00:20:02,938
in a 200-square-foot tent.
425
00:20:02,940 --> 00:20:05,557
Then the kids moved out,
and now when you go camping,
426
00:20:05,559 --> 00:20:07,584
you and your old lady feel like
427
00:20:07,586 --> 00:20:09,653
the last two people at a circus.
428
00:20:09,655 --> 00:20:11,788
That's why this month at Outdoor Man,
429
00:20:11,790 --> 00:20:16,389
we're inviting you empty nesters
to trade in your old family tent
430
00:20:16,391 --> 00:20:19,498
for a discount on our
new, cozy, two-person tent.
431
00:20:19,500 --> 00:20:22,040
Insulated, easy setup, water-resistant.
432
00:20:22,042 --> 00:20:24,973
Now, the only thing it can't do
is protect you from those bears.
433
00:20:24,975 --> 00:20:27,271
But don't worry, they probably
just want to show you photos
434
00:20:27,273 --> 00:20:28,880
of their cubs and grand-cubs.
435
00:20:28,882 --> 00:20:31,356
And then they're gonna maul you.
436
00:20:31,358 --> 00:20:32,416
Baxter out.
437
00:20:37,411 --> 00:20:39,600
Okay, these two guys
are at the beach, right?
438
00:20:39,602 --> 00:20:42,362
Santa Monica Pier, they're
sitting there, and one guy tells
439
00:20:42,364 --> 00:20:44,331
the other guy, "You know,
women never pay attention to me.
440
00:20:44,333 --> 00:20:45,856
You always get attention from women.
441
00:20:45,858 --> 00:20:47,231
Is there any trick I can do?"
442
00:20:47,233 --> 00:20:49,844
The guy says, "It's a trick I
don't usually tell many people.
443
00:20:49,846 --> 00:20:51,302
Here's what I want you to do.
444
00:20:51,304 --> 00:20:53,763
Get a potato, put it
in your bathing suit".
445
00:20:53,765 --> 00:20:55,906
The guy says, "What?"
"Don't ask questions,
446
00:20:55,908 --> 00:20:57,334
just do as I say".
447
00:20:57,336 --> 00:20:59,150
And then the guy, you
know, he finds a potato,
448
00:20:59,152 --> 00:21:01,587
puts it in his bathing suit,
goes out on the beach.
449
00:21:01,589 --> 00:21:03,581
He comes back probably 15 minutes later.
450
00:21:03,583 --> 00:21:05,258
And he's-he's livid.
451
00:21:05,260 --> 00:21:07,823
He goes, "You told me to put
a potato in my bathing suit
452
00:21:07,825 --> 00:21:09,169
and the lifeguard kicked me out.
453
00:21:09,171 --> 00:21:11,397
Women were screaming,
children were running from me".
454
00:21:12,909 --> 00:21:14,925
And the guy that told him that says,
455
00:21:14,927 --> 00:21:17,511
"You put the potato in the front".
456
00:21:25,104 --> 00:21:27,955
So what should have made
the man appear well-endowed,
457
00:21:27,957 --> 00:21:31,100
in fact made it look
like he soiled himself.
458
00:21:33,429 --> 00:21:36,356
- Uh, yeah, that's-that's the joke.
- Yeah.
459
00:21:40,195 --> 00:21:42,403
- Synced and corrected by Firefly -
- www.addic7ed.com -
35082
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