Original subtitles

[theme music]

-Who are you?

What do you want?

I am Zanthus Pia, Head of the Galactic Peace Commission,

and I order you to leave immediately.

Assassinating me will gain you nothing.

Others will replace me, then others.

We will have peace in this galaxy!

-K9, you're going to have to work with us just

a little harder, if we're going to retrieve your memories.

-I'm working with you as hard as I can.

This fragment from just before I transported here

is all the memory I have.

STARKEY: Professor, you can't get blood out of a stone.

-Incorrect.

The rocks of Nebulax Four may be successfully

squeezed for blood, mucus, saliva.

-OK.

I stand corrected.

-Snot, phlegm, vomit.

-We get the picture.

-He can retrieve hard data, but not memories.

-It'll probably just come back to him in his own time.

Maybe I should take him for a walk to get his mind off it.

-Are you suggesting that walkies may

have a stimulating effect on artificial intelligence?

-There's one way to find out.

-Gryffen.

-It's just like being there, except, thank goodness,

I don't have to be.

How much it's all changed.

-Well, I guess that's what happens when you

haven't been outside in 10 years.

-There, there used to be a cafe there.

They served the best baked bean sandwiches in London.

K9: Prognosis, gas.

What is the purpose of that device?

-You hop on, and you go round and round.

-And? -That's it.

It's fun. -Fun?

Can pointless have the same meaning?

Uh oh.

[alarm]

-My kids!

They're stuck on that thing!

It won't stop!

-[screaming]

-Department vehicles converging.

-Three camos.

-Save yourself, K9.

-Order declined.

-Chaps, get out of there.

Thomson's plum pudding.

-Move along.

There's nothing to see here.

-Those are my children.

-We'll be the judge of that, missus.

-This is a dissident attack.

There's a bomb connected to the speed

clutch in the control center.

If we try to stop, or even slow the wheel--

[imitating explosion] -[gasps]

-I have to help them.

-K9 the place is viral with CCPCs.

-It's a compulsion.

I'm programmed to assist humans in distress.

-Well, if you don't control it, I'll have to sit on you.

-Why are humans such apes?

-Yeah, the light's better over here.

-Where'd that come from so fast?

-Remarkable.

Full corporeal transfer of life with no discernible--

-Stay where I can see you?

-How did you control the portal?

-I didn't.

And I'll be asking the questions here.

-Absolutely.

But how did you control it?

Where are my manners.

You had a long journey. Tea?

Darjeeling?

-Be assured, this dissident threat

will be tracked down and eliminated

by your government's appropriate authorities.

Stay within sight of a CCTV surveillance point,

and report any suspicions.

-It's a publicly stunt.

Rogue dissidents plant bomb.

Department saves day.

All hail the department.

-Unlikely. -Why?

I mean, the place was surrounded by cameras

before a bomb had even bee found.

-They were contacted by an informant.

-And the news camera just turning up?

K9: It's news.

Turning up at news is what they do.

-Well, if it's such big news, and such a big threat, how come

the departmentoids haven't done anything yet?

They're waiting for more cameras to get here.

-Conclusion logical.

Unlike departmentoids, this unit is not interested in cameras.

I have to help them.

-No, wait.

I've got a plan.

-That's from India, that.

I'm, uh, sorry to seem so inquisitive.

But, see, I've never been able to control

space time from this end.

Uh, I suspect what I need is a stable portal

from the other end, like you must have.

-I followed someone here.

-Followed? Who?

-The cybernetic device known as K9.

-Really?

Hmm.

[screams]

-The department is always watching over you.

-Here at ground zero.

-Why don't they do anything.

That man there, Inspector Drake, he's in charge.

He could do something.

-Inspector Drake.

Inspector Drake, why don't you help my children?

[indistinct complaints]

[music playing]

[ticking]

-K9, there is a bomb.

-So it seems. -Shh.

Keep it down.

-I could disable ridiculously large amusement device

without detonating explosive.

Commencing link.

-Are you sure?

Because I've kind of developed this habit of,

you know, staying in one piece?

K9: Your habit is safe.

According to my sensors, it's a non-explosive bomb.

-Non-explosive?

-A mixture of flour, oil, salt, and potassium bitartrate.

-Plasticine?

-I guess even the department wouldn't risk

a real bomb in a publicity stunt.

-Assessment logical.

-It's slowing down.

CCPC: What?

[cheering]

-What on earth?

Is that a machine?

ROBOT POLICE: Kid, we want a word with you.

-Have a word with this.

-What?

[applause]

-They're escaping the scene now.

-Then let's arrest them in front of all these cameras

for apparently saving those peoples' lives, shall we?

-Cybernetics, hey?

Fascinating.

You know, I once considered a career in cybernetics.

But-- -Enough.

I shall waste no more time waiting.

Where is the device known as K9?

-No idea.

I mean, where you'd even find parts and services

for a device like that around here, I--

-Can you truly be as non-evolved as you appear?

Apparently so.

-You know, perhaps if you told me

why you're so eager to find this, uh, K9?

-I am Ahab.

I be the most renowned bounty hunter in this galaxy.

-Bounty hunter?

-I am here to bring the K9 device

to stand trial before galactic council.

-To stand trial?

What for? -Murder.

This cyborg known as K9 be wanted in the year 50,000,

for the willful and unlawful disintegration of zampas pyra.

President of Galactic Peace Assembly.

-Uh, sorry to disappoint you.

But, uh, you've got the wrong millennium.

There's no K9 here.

VOICE ANALYZER: Subject is lying.

-My voice analyzer says you're lying, not that I need it.

-OK, then.

Let me put it this way.

I'm not telling you where he is, no matter what you do to me.

VOICE ANALYZER: Subject telling truth.

TV: When these unknown individuals interfere,

these persons-- and their mechanical dog--

actually put lives at risk.

-Mechanical dog.

TV: We will be doing all we can to apprehend

these dangerous individuals.

Nobody can hide from the department.

-How do I find this department?

-Just put your alien mush in front of any CCTV feed camera.

They'll find you.

-Inspector Drake, we need to talk.

-Murder?

-That's ridiculous.

K9 couldn't harm anybody.

His programming forbids it.

-Well, according to this, he disintegrated this Zanthas Pia

with extreme prejudice.

-Is there any other way to disintegrate someone?

K9: I have no memory of such an event.

-So even if he did do it, you can't haul someone

in for something they don't remember.

-Amnesia is not a defense in a court of law.

Statement embarrassingly faulty.

-Hey, I'm looking for a way to dig

you out of this, photon breath.

-Quantum increase in intelligent logic required.

-K9's not even the same dog anymore.

The old one blew himself up, sacrificed himself.

This is a new K9.

-Well, not really. It's a new body.

But the brain is the same.

That kind of makes him the same dog.

-So they're after him for something

he's going to do in the future?

-And this Zanthas character hasn't even been zapped yet?

-Don't you love temporal conundrums?

-I'm sure they're great, professor.

But this bounty hunter sounds more like an arrest now,

conundrum later kind of guy.

-K9 has to hide. -Great.

But I don't think it'll be easy.

I get the impression there weren't too many

bounties this Ahab hadn't hunted down.

-Then I guess we're going to need

someone who knows where to hide.

-Who would that be?

CCPC: Kid, we want a word with you.

-Have a word with this.

-What?

JUNE: Oh, honestly, inspector, I thought

the whole reason for this charade

was to make us look good.

-My plan was perfect.

The only thing I didn't take into account

was the incompetence of your section.

-My section?

-You are responsible for monitoring alien activity.

That cybernetic dog is clearly of alien origin.

Yet you obviously know nothing about it.

-I know it's name is K9.

I know it arrived via a time space portal.

And I know Professor Gryffen is currently examining it.

-You were aware of the presence a dangerous alien,

yet you failed to alert my section?

-I failed to alert your security section,

because K9's not dangerous.

On the contrary.

His technology be of great value to us.

-I agree.

But the sooner my department can apprehend it,

an dismantle it, the sooner we'll learn its secrets.

-Except that your section has no jurisdiction,

since K9 poses no security threat.

-Really?

You believe that?

-Yes, I do.

[beeping]

-Sir?

-I shall consider whose jurisdiction K9 falls under,

but for the meantime, both keep doing what you're doing.

-So, you agree.

K9 is under my control.

-I agree to keep doing what I'm doing.

-A drain?

It takes someone who really knows

how to hide to come up with this.

-It's not a drain.

It's a sewer.

-Ugh.

A sewer? -Yeah.

And it takes someone who really knows

where to hide to come up with this.

-What's this?

-A storage facility.

-I suppose all this fell off the back of a truck.

-Well, not all of it.

-All this stuff fell out of the back of a van.

But no satellite cameras, no cops.

Perfect place to hide anything, don't you think?

--[sigh] If you don't mind starving to death.

-Well, just goes to show, never underestimate what

you'll find in the back of a truck.

-So if Inspector Drake does come for K9,

let me know immediately.

He has no authority.

-Hmm.

Strangely, you're not the only one

looking for K9 at the moment.

I had a visit this morning from a galactic bounty hunter.

-A bounty hunter?

PROFESSOR GRYFFEN: Mm.

-Well, he has no authority, either.

I'll issue a warrant for his arrest and deportation.

Where's K9?

-The kids are hiding him.

This bounty hunter seems a rather desperate character.

JUNE: Then Jorji can come home with me now.

-I think that's a very wise idea.

Unfortunately, I don't know where she and the others are.

-What?

-Well, we agreed that I shouldn't know,

so that I wouldn't be able to reveal

their location even under pressure.

But I'm sure they're fine.

-Really?

So my daughter's out there with a dissident, a petty thief,

and a suspected-- what's K9 wanted for?

-Murder.

-Murder.

He's a suspected murderer?

That's your idea of fine?

-He's only a suspect.

And I'm certain he's innocent.

-That doesn't matter.

This bounty hunter thinks he's chasing a murderer.

What do you think will happen to anyone

who gets caught between him and K9?

-Sugar?

-I need to find her.

You better hope it's before this bounty hunter does.

-[sigh]

-Tea?

-Someone to see you, sir.

-Send him in.

You claim to have the means to subdue the K9 device?

-But it needs to be found first.

That be your job.

-I give the orders on this planet.

-I don't know your city.

You use your network of spies and cameras to find the dog.

I'll show you how to unlock his secrets.

A deal?

-Well, if everyone's finished-- can't have a dirty sewer.

-How's K9? -Defragging.

-Do you think it's possible K9 really

did assassinate that, uh, galactic dude?

-No way.

DARIUS: Yeah?

We don't even know what he did before he came here.

He doesn't even know himself.

-Has he even done one suspicious thing since he's been here?

-All right, yeah.

Oh, he's so gentle.

He wouldn't hurt a fly. You watch.

One day, you'll be patting him.

And he'll go chomp.

Where'd my arm go? [fake crying]

-He's not a killer. I know him.

-Chomp. Oh! [fake crying]

JORJIE: Give it a rest, you two.

I need my sleep.

Uh, let's not.

-Assassinating me will gain you nothing.

Others will replace me, then others.

We will have peace in this galaxy.

-This unit is guilty.

This unit is a murderer.

New priority.

Resolve conflict. Surrender to authorities.

[beeping]

-The sewer? Ingenious.

Who, who would think of looking for them there?

-No one.

Because it's a sewer.

And my daughter spent the night there, Gryffen, my daughter.

-Oh.

-I'm on my way there now.

You hear anything from them you, tell

them to stay where they are.

-Will do.

Careful where you walk.

Why would K9 be so careless as to miss a motion detector?

K9, are you there?

Answer.

K9, what is it you're showing me?

K9: Human life protection programming compromised.

Resolution in progress.

-I don't get it.

Why would K9 just leave?

-Maybe it didn't.

-The bounty hunter.

-Or maybe he just got sick of roughing it.

-K9, stop.

Where are you going?

-This unit must surrender to the authorities.

This unit must stand trial.

-What do you mean?

What happened?

-While I was defragging, I recalled something.

I recalled committing the crime of which I'm charged.

-Well, that's what I told you.

-You were probably dreaming.

-Or you imagined it.

-I do not dream.

And I have no imagination.

I am a criminal. -Absolutely right.

-Ahab.

Run, K9.

-No.

I can run, but I can not hide.

It is time to face justice.

-The sewer tunnel, I was just about to go down there myself.

What are you doing there?

INSPECTOR DRAKE: I was dealing with the alien.

-The bounty hunter's there?

Is my daughter all right?

INSPECTOR DRAKE: She was fine, last I saw.

-Last you saw?

Where is she?

INSPECTOR DRAKE: She and the others

went back to Gryffen's house.

-And the alien?

INSPECTOR DRAKE: He took them there.

-You let it take my daughter?

INSPECTOR DRAKE: I didn't have much choice.

He took us off guard.

-How, exactly?

INSPECTOR DRAKE: We had an arrangement.

-You and an alien?

INSPECTOR DRAKE: Which would have given us access

to the K9 device's technology.

-Oh, I should have known.

INSPECTOR DRAKE: The alien went back on it.

He neutralized my CCPCs, and has taken the K9 device with him.

-Brilliantly handled.

From now on, all matters relating to K9

will be handled by my section.

We can't afford for you to keep doing what you're doing,

can we?

STARKEY: Professor, K9 gave himself up.

He thinks he's guilty. K9: The evidence is undeniable.

I must face justice.

-Come on. JORJIE: What is that thing?

-It's a super-cold post-Einstein property

close to absolute zero.

Don't touch it.

-The cold has turned the K9 into a superconductor.

K9: It's accelerated my processors.

Some of my memory has cleared.

-Assassinating me will gain you nothing.

We will have peace in this galaxy.

[moaning]

-You're the assassin.

-You're taking K9 because he saw you do it.

-A loose end I'll soon be able to cut off.

-Let him go.

-K9, you didn't harm anybody.

You're innocent.

-Unable to resist.

Effect of extreme cold draining my power.

-Is that tea hot? -Boiling.

MALE SPEAKER: We're

-Ah!

-Ha.

Brilliant.

Extreme heat meets extreme cold.

You know, the [inaudible] we saw in K9's memory

must be the same one who followed him through the portal

to here.

-All manner of conflicts now resolved.

-K9 never put the chump on anyone.

-You're a free dog.

-Not quite.

K9 is an alien presence.

And, as such, is under the control of the department--

my section, not security.

Gryffen, I'm giving you responsibility.

This is now officially the K9 unit, answerable directly

to me, In all matters, including my daughter's safety.

-Mom.

-We'll talk about last night when you get home,

and you've had a shower.

-Well, that's all well and good.

But what I want to know is what's stopping that Ahab

character from coming, and putting the chump on us.

-I don't think we need to worry.

He entered the time of his destination, but not the place.

-So?

-He's going to land in this exact spot, 50,000 years

from now. -So he's home safe and sound.

-Not exactly.

See, the planets are continually moving through space.

In 50,000 years, the earth won't be here.

-So where is he?

K9: Lost in space.

-Whoa!

[music playing]