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1
00:00:04,046 --> 00:00:05,743
- And I believe
that's all I've got.
2
00:00:05,788 --> 00:00:07,658
Oh, wait,
there's one more thing.
3
00:00:07,703 --> 00:00:10,009
Peralta gave me a note
before the meeting.
4
00:00:11,445 --> 00:00:15,057
Ugh, the penmanship is horrid,
but I think it says,
5
00:00:15,102 --> 00:00:17,146
"Ask if anyone has
an anal mint."
6
00:00:17,190 --> 00:00:19,149
- It's announcements, and we do.
7
00:00:19,193 --> 00:00:20,585
- Wow, what an entrance.
8
00:00:20,629 --> 00:00:23,501
- Amy and I have
some big news to share.
9
00:00:23,545 --> 00:00:25,675
- I'm pregnant.
- We're pregnant!
10
00:00:25,721 --> 00:00:27,504
- Wow, I can't believe it.
- Congratulations.
11
00:00:27,547 --> 00:00:28,765
- What a surprise.
12
00:00:28,811 --> 00:00:30,353
- What the hell?
I thought you guys would be
13
00:00:30,378 --> 00:00:32,484
more excited than that.
Charles, you didn't even faint.
14
00:00:32,509 --> 00:00:34,817
- I'm so sorry, I'll try.
15
00:00:34,859 --> 00:00:36,340
It's not working.
Somebody choke me.
16
00:00:36,384 --> 00:00:37,384
- On it.
- Rosa.
17
00:00:37,426 --> 00:00:39,298
Sorry, we're so happy for you,
18
00:00:39,343 --> 00:00:41,563
but we also maybe,
kind of already knew.
19
00:00:41,606 --> 00:00:43,408
I mean, you didn't do
the best job of hiding it.
20
00:00:43,432 --> 00:00:46,307
Why have you been carrying
that box around so much?
21
00:00:46,350 --> 00:00:47,698
- I just love this box.
22
00:00:47,743 --> 00:00:49,182
- Why are you reading
that newspaper?
23
00:00:49,222 --> 00:00:51,051
It's two days old.
- I just love this issue.
24
00:00:51,094 --> 00:00:52,548
- Hey, why are you wearing
that hazmat suit?
25
00:00:52,573 --> 00:00:53,835
- I just love this look.
26
00:00:53,878 --> 00:00:55,682
- Okay, fine, so you all
knew we were pregnant.
27
00:00:55,707 --> 00:00:57,423
Good for you.
But I bet you didn't figure out
28
00:00:57,448 --> 00:00:59,231
that we're having twins.
29
00:01:01,148 --> 00:01:02,584
- No, not really.
It's one baby.
30
00:01:02,627 --> 00:01:04,325
I just needed
to see Charles faint.
31
00:01:24,388 --> 00:01:25,694
- Aw, Jake.
32
00:01:25,736 --> 00:01:28,390
I am excited that
you're having a kid.
33
00:01:28,436 --> 00:01:30,109
- Thank you, Dad.
Oh, and hey, if you're free
34
00:01:30,132 --> 00:01:31,676
next Friday, we're having
a sex reveal party.
35
00:01:31,700 --> 00:01:33,417
- Well, I went to one
of those in Amsterdam.
36
00:01:33,441 --> 00:01:35,399
I would not invite relatives.
37
00:01:35,442 --> 00:01:37,051
- What?
No, no, no.
38
00:01:37,097 --> 00:01:39,204
It's a party where we find out
the biological sex of the baby
39
00:01:39,228 --> 00:01:40,317
in a surprising way.
40
00:01:40,359 --> 00:01:41,640
- You better hope
you're having a girl.
41
00:01:41,664 --> 00:01:44,234
Peralta fathers do not
get along with sons.
42
00:01:44,277 --> 00:01:45,670
- What?
That's not true.
43
00:01:45,712 --> 00:01:47,430
I mean, look at us.
We're doing better than ever.
44
00:01:47,454 --> 00:01:49,346
This year, you even remembered
my birthday month.
45
00:01:49,370 --> 00:01:51,152
- Things are good now,
but honestly,
46
00:01:51,198 --> 00:01:53,807
it's probably just a blip.
- Well, that's fun to hear.
47
00:01:53,852 --> 00:01:55,331
- Well, that's just
the way it is.
48
00:01:55,376 --> 00:01:56,638
It's the family curse.
49
00:01:56,680 --> 00:01:58,901
I haven't talked to my father
since you were 10.
50
00:01:58,944 --> 00:02:01,337
His dad abandoned him
at the World's Fair.
51
00:02:01,382 --> 00:02:05,908
His dad fled to America after
drowning his dad in a well.
52
00:02:05,950 --> 00:02:07,257
- Oh, my God.
53
00:02:07,301 --> 00:02:09,781
Okay, so yes, fine,
there's a bit of a trend.
54
00:02:09,824 --> 00:02:11,609
But we're not cursed.
You and I are good.
55
00:02:11,651 --> 00:02:13,573
I bet you could even
fix things up with your dad.
56
00:02:13,610 --> 00:02:15,002
- The Admiral?
57
00:02:15,045 --> 00:02:16,895
I always hoped that I could
reconcile things with him
58
00:02:16,919 --> 00:02:18,634
one day, but he's not
going to let that happen.
59
00:02:18,658 --> 00:02:21,617
What can I tell you?
We're not meant to have sons.
60
00:02:21,663 --> 00:02:23,621
There's a demon in our genes.
61
00:02:23,663 --> 00:02:26,318
- Title of your sex tape.
- No, the title of my sex tape
62
00:02:26,361 --> 00:02:28,800
is "Cockpit Larry and
the Mile High Stewardae."
63
00:02:28,842 --> 00:02:29,931
- What?
- "Stewardae."
64
00:02:29,973 --> 00:02:31,932
It's plural for stewardess.
65
00:02:31,977 --> 00:02:32,935
- Okay.
66
00:02:32,978 --> 00:02:34,632
- ADA Kurm, how are you?
67
00:02:34,675 --> 00:02:37,287
- Do you want the real answer,
about how my wife's leaving me,
68
00:02:37,331 --> 00:02:39,637
or do you just want me to say,
"Good, how are you?"
69
00:02:39,680 --> 00:02:41,115
- The latter?
70
00:02:41,161 --> 00:02:42,877
- Good, how are you?
- We're fine; why are you here?
71
00:02:42,901 --> 00:02:44,699
- You know that Carroll Street
Brownstone B&E?
72
00:02:44,728 --> 00:02:46,729
- Yeah, broken windows,
swiped an old TV.
73
00:02:46,775 --> 00:02:48,533
- The house belongs
to a friend of the mayor's.
74
00:02:48,557 --> 00:02:51,954
- Oh, I didn't realize
the case was a priority.
75
00:02:51,997 --> 00:02:53,389
I'll check into it right away.
76
00:02:53,432 --> 00:02:55,194
- Great, call me as soon as
you have anything.
77
00:02:55,218 --> 00:02:57,610
- Yeah.
Will do.
78
00:02:57,655 --> 00:02:59,614
Oh, God, what a nightmare.
79
00:02:59,656 --> 00:03:00,657
- Agreed.
Dude's a mess.
80
00:03:00,700 --> 00:03:01,657
You know he's only 24?
81
00:03:01,703 --> 00:03:03,181
- No, the Carroll Street case.
82
00:03:03,224 --> 00:03:05,313
I didn't realize that the mayor
was interested in it,
83
00:03:05,359 --> 00:03:07,925
and I think I did something bad.
84
00:03:07,968 --> 00:03:10,449
- You gave Hitchcock and Scully
an important case?
85
00:03:10,492 --> 00:03:13,235
Both:
86
00:03:13,280 --> 00:03:14,846
- Okay, here's the cake.
87
00:03:14,889 --> 00:03:16,389
If it's pink on the inside,
it's a girl.
88
00:03:16,413 --> 00:03:17,562
And if it's blue, it's a boy.
89
00:03:17,586 --> 00:03:19,199
- And why do you seem
so bummed by that?
90
00:03:19,240 --> 00:03:21,349
- Because I still think you
should have done the pig roast,
91
00:03:21,375 --> 00:03:22,829
where we start eating it
from the snout,
92
00:03:22,853 --> 00:03:24,830
and discover the baby's sex
when we get to the genitals.
93
00:03:24,854 --> 00:03:26,443
- Yeah, you know,
Amy wanted to do that too,
94
00:03:26,466 --> 00:03:27,574
but I just don't see it.
- Hmm.
95
00:03:27,598 --> 00:03:28,728
I'm getting a text.
96
00:03:28,771 --> 00:03:30,730
Ooh.
"I will see you soon, sir."
97
00:03:30,775 --> 00:03:32,341
Guess who that was.
- Elton John.
98
00:03:32,384 --> 00:03:33,473
- What?
99
00:03:33,515 --> 00:03:34,668
- You said "sir,"
and that's on you.
100
00:03:34,692 --> 00:03:36,277
- No, it was my grandfather,
the Admiral.
101
00:03:36,301 --> 00:03:37,563
- Whoa, you tracked him down?
102
00:03:37,608 --> 00:03:38,846
- Yup, he's on his way
to my apartment right now.
103
00:03:38,870 --> 00:03:40,543
I'm going to fix
his relationship with my dad.
104
00:03:40,567 --> 00:03:41,872
It's going to be very emotional.
105
00:03:41,917 --> 00:03:43,199
- It's going to be so dramatic.
You should be
106
00:03:43,223 --> 00:03:44,548
producing for Ellen.
- Do you really think so?
107
00:03:44,572 --> 00:03:45,984
'Cause I actually have
another idea for a segment
108
00:03:46,008 --> 00:03:47,768
where Ellen turns your home
into a haunted house.
109
00:03:47,792 --> 00:03:50,578
I call it "Extreme Makeover:
Bone Edition."
110
00:03:52,884 --> 00:03:55,015
But you know, I...
I don't have to do it.
111
00:03:55,060 --> 00:03:56,688
I like being a cop.
- And you're so good at it.
112
00:03:56,712 --> 00:03:58,038
- Yeah, okay, I'm going
to go meet my grandpa.
113
00:03:58,062 --> 00:03:59,239
- Yup.
114
00:04:01,502 --> 00:04:03,895
- Ooh, fun!
Terry's playing the flute.
115
00:04:03,937 --> 00:04:06,461
- At work.
Who are you, William Wonka?
116
00:04:06,507 --> 00:04:08,335
- No, this is police business.
117
00:04:08,377 --> 00:04:10,728
The flautist
for the NYPD band retired,
118
00:04:10,771 --> 00:04:12,728
and I'm going to audition
to take her spot.
119
00:04:12,774 --> 00:04:15,384
Captain Holt, you love music.
Can you give me some pointers?
120
00:04:15,429 --> 00:04:18,300
- I'd rather not.
The music they play is dreck.
121
00:04:18,345 --> 00:04:19,824
Last month, they performed Sousa
122
00:04:19,867 --> 00:04:21,391
at a fallen officer's funeral.
123
00:04:21,435 --> 00:04:23,697
And the people were
so appalled, they cried.
124
00:04:23,740 --> 00:04:25,264
- Or they were crying
for the deceased.
125
00:04:25,307 --> 00:04:26,483
- No, she was very unpopular.
126
00:04:26,526 --> 00:04:29,312
The band made them cry.
127
00:04:29,355 --> 00:04:31,072
- Suffice it to say,
I don't respect what they do,
128
00:04:31,096 --> 00:04:32,487
so I wouldn't be
the right teacher.
129
00:04:32,533 --> 00:04:34,274
I'm sorry.
130
00:04:36,057 --> 00:04:37,711
- Hey, Grandpa.
131
00:04:37,754 --> 00:04:39,930
- Attention!
- Oh.
132
00:04:39,975 --> 00:04:41,975
- At ease.
Just pulling your leg.
133
00:04:42,019 --> 00:04:44,413
I'm your grandfather,
not your commanding officer.
134
00:04:44,456 --> 00:04:45,415
Now, come on.
- Aw.
135
00:04:45,459 --> 00:04:46,937
- Give me a handshake.
- Okay.
136
00:04:46,980 --> 00:04:48,156
Right, come on in.
137
00:04:48,199 --> 00:04:52,334
- Wow, it's really been
quite a while, huh?
138
00:04:52,379 --> 00:04:53,617
- Yeah.
- Are you still watching
139
00:04:53,641 --> 00:04:55,555
those cartoons
about the karate lizards?
140
00:04:55,598 --> 00:04:57,730
- The "Teenage Mutant
Ninja Turtles"?
141
00:04:57,774 --> 00:04:59,776
I am.
There was recently a reboot.
142
00:04:59,821 --> 00:05:01,014
They did some interesting things
143
00:05:01,038 --> 00:05:02,605
with Splinter
and Krang's backstories.
144
00:05:02,649 --> 00:05:04,016
Anyways, I'm an adult now.
How are you?
145
00:05:04,040 --> 00:05:06,653
- Oh, me?
Well, I guess I'm...
146
00:05:11,004 --> 00:05:12,615
- Grandpa?
- What?
147
00:05:12,660 --> 00:05:13,939
- Oh, I was just asking
how you were.
148
00:05:13,963 --> 00:05:15,879
- Oh, sharp as ever.
- Yeah.
149
00:05:15,923 --> 00:05:17,447
- I'm so glad you
reached out to me.
150
00:05:17,490 --> 00:05:19,754
- Same, you know, now that
I'm having a baby of my own,
151
00:05:19,797 --> 00:05:21,495
I've started to realize
how important
152
00:05:21,538 --> 00:05:23,800
father/son/grandfather
relationships really are.
153
00:05:23,845 --> 00:05:26,716
Which reminds me,
my dad is also coming.
154
00:05:26,761 --> 00:05:27,805
- He is?
155
00:05:27,848 --> 00:05:29,129
I'm surprised
he wanted to see me.
156
00:05:29,153 --> 00:05:31,548
- Well, he doesn't exactly
know you're here.
157
00:05:31,591 --> 00:05:33,810
I thought it might be cool
to surprise both of you.
158
00:05:33,855 --> 00:05:35,987
- You know who else
thought surprises were cool?
159
00:05:36,031 --> 00:05:39,425
Admiral Yamamoto, and we all
know what happened then, huh?
160
00:05:39,468 --> 00:05:40,817
- We do?
- Pearl Harbor.
161
00:05:40,862 --> 00:05:42,665
- Pearl Harbor, right.
Some surprises can be bad.
162
00:05:42,689 --> 00:05:44,798
But this one's not gonna be.
This one's gonna be good,
163
00:05:44,822 --> 00:05:45,843
just like...
- The Battle of Midway.
164
00:05:45,867 --> 00:05:47,346
- The Bimble of Durbay.
Yup.
165
00:05:47,389 --> 00:05:48,454
We both said the same
thing at the same time.
166
00:05:48,478 --> 00:05:49,740
Oh, that's my Dad.
167
00:05:49,783 --> 00:05:51,786
This is going to be amazing.
168
00:05:51,829 --> 00:05:53,831
- Hey, Jakey.
- Roger Peralta.
169
00:05:53,875 --> 00:05:55,485
Prepare to hug and cry.
170
00:05:55,528 --> 00:05:58,879
This is your father.
171
00:05:58,923 --> 00:06:01,882
- Dad, you son of a bitch.
172
00:06:01,925 --> 00:06:03,884
- Uh-oh.
Ow!
173
00:06:07,235 --> 00:06:08,975
I can't believe you hit me.
174
00:06:09,019 --> 00:06:10,237
- I'm sorry.
175
00:06:10,281 --> 00:06:12,153
- My face is throbbing.
Hey, "Dino Bites."
176
00:06:12,197 --> 00:06:13,564
- What the hell is
my father doing here?
177
00:06:13,588 --> 00:06:15,286
- You said you wanted
to reconcile.
178
00:06:15,331 --> 00:06:16,985
- I meant after he was dead.
179
00:06:17,028 --> 00:06:18,552
I planned on standing
over his grave
180
00:06:18,595 --> 00:06:20,161
and yelling, "I forgive you."
181
00:06:20,204 --> 00:06:22,182
- Well, you may get the chance
sooner than you think.
182
00:06:22,206 --> 00:06:24,079
He keeps trailing off
and staring into space.
183
00:06:24,122 --> 00:06:26,427
That's his old trick.
184
00:06:26,473 --> 00:06:28,362
Whenever he doesn't want
to talk about something,
185
00:06:28,387 --> 00:06:29,997
he does that.
The old bastard.
186
00:06:30,040 --> 00:06:31,564
- Look, I know
you don't like him,
187
00:06:31,608 --> 00:06:35,220
but can you at least
try to be nice for me?
188
00:06:35,264 --> 00:06:37,353
- Okay.
189
00:06:37,396 --> 00:06:38,745
I'll be nice.
190
00:06:38,788 --> 00:06:41,009
I wish you were dead,
you lousy son of a bitch!
191
00:06:41,052 --> 00:06:42,487
- You said
you were gonna be nice.
192
00:06:42,531 --> 00:06:44,576
- I lied so I could say
the "son of a bitch" thing.
193
00:06:44,620 --> 00:06:46,057
- Dad!
- Okay.
194
00:06:46,100 --> 00:06:49,538
Your grandson would like us
to make peace.
195
00:06:49,581 --> 00:06:52,454
So, do you apologize
for being the worst father
196
00:06:52,499 --> 00:06:54,475
in the history in the world?
Even worse than fathers
197
00:06:54,500 --> 00:06:56,153
who chain their children
in basements?
198
00:06:56,197 --> 00:06:58,242
- I do not.
- That's on him. I tried.
199
00:06:58,286 --> 00:07:00,307
- I really don't think you did.
- Jake, you don't get it.
200
00:07:00,331 --> 00:07:01,507
He's a heartless jerk.
201
00:07:01,550 --> 00:07:02,875
When I was in high school,
I almost died.
202
00:07:02,899 --> 00:07:04,511
He didn't even visit me
in the hospital.
203
00:07:04,552 --> 00:07:06,425
- Okay, so maybe
start by asking him
204
00:07:06,468 --> 00:07:07,949
to apologize for that.
205
00:07:07,992 --> 00:07:11,300
- No, he should apologize to me
for being in the hospital.
206
00:07:11,343 --> 00:07:13,060
- I'm starting to see
the heartless thing now.
207
00:07:13,084 --> 00:07:16,043
- Growing up, he had a boat.
Meant everything to him.
208
00:07:16,086 --> 00:07:18,132
He named it "Walter,"
after himself.
209
00:07:18,175 --> 00:07:19,656
- She was the child I never had.
210
00:07:19,699 --> 00:07:21,963
- I was the child you did have.
211
00:07:22,004 --> 00:07:24,399
Anyway, one day I took
Walter Junior out for a spin.
212
00:07:24,444 --> 00:07:27,055
I was trying to impress
one of the lake girls.
213
00:07:27,098 --> 00:07:29,536
Before I met your mom, I was
a bit of a ladies' man.
214
00:07:29,579 --> 00:07:31,538
- Yes, that continued
long after you met my mom.
215
00:07:31,581 --> 00:07:33,540
- He's always been a floozy.
- It was dark.
216
00:07:33,581 --> 00:07:36,237
I crashed into the dock;
I woke up in the hospital.
217
00:07:36,281 --> 00:07:37,543
- How was the girl?
- Flexible.
218
00:07:37,586 --> 00:07:39,240
Man, she could put her leg...
Total...
219
00:07:39,283 --> 00:07:40,634
- No, I was...
After the accident.
220
00:07:40,677 --> 00:07:42,026
- Oh, right!
No.
221
00:07:42,069 --> 00:07:43,264
She was totally unhurt,
thank goodness.
222
00:07:43,288 --> 00:07:44,918
But I was in the hospital
for three weeks,
223
00:07:44,942 --> 00:07:48,119
and Admiral Ass
never visited me once.
224
00:07:48,163 --> 00:07:50,470
- I warned you
not to take the boat out.
225
00:07:50,512 --> 00:07:53,168
You make mistakes, you got
to accept the consequences.
226
00:07:53,211 --> 00:07:55,692
- I'm your son!
- And Walter was my daughter.
227
00:07:55,735 --> 00:07:57,475
Okay, both of you, stop.
228
00:07:57,519 --> 00:07:59,261
You're acting like children.
You know what?
229
00:07:59,302 --> 00:08:01,218
That's it, if you're gonna
act like kids,
230
00:08:01,262 --> 00:08:03,264
then I'm gonna act
like a parent.
231
00:08:03,307 --> 00:08:05,136
- "Cry Hard with a Vengeance"?
- Yeah.
232
00:08:05,180 --> 00:08:07,355
It's Bruce Willis' book
about parenting.
233
00:08:07,399 --> 00:08:09,052
And we're gonna read it.
234
00:08:09,096 --> 00:08:12,274
- I just got another call from
the saddest ADA in the world.
235
00:08:12,317 --> 00:08:14,319
He's still pissed.
Did Hitchcock and Scully
236
00:08:14,362 --> 00:08:15,798
get anywhere?
- Hard to say.
237
00:08:15,843 --> 00:08:19,062
Their file contains a lot
of non-case related documents.
238
00:08:19,105 --> 00:08:20,237
- A bunch of menus?
239
00:08:20,281 --> 00:08:22,110
- A cease and desist letter
from TJ Maxx.
240
00:08:22,153 --> 00:08:23,459
- Multiple patent submissions
241
00:08:23,502 --> 00:08:25,069
for something called
a "pillow shoe."
242
00:08:25,112 --> 00:08:27,201
- An application
for a time share in Figi.
243
00:08:27,245 --> 00:08:29,987
- You mean Fiji.
- No, Figi with a G.
244
00:08:30,031 --> 00:08:32,379
They're getting scammed.
245
00:08:32,423 --> 00:08:34,337
- Wait.
This is good.
246
00:08:34,383 --> 00:08:36,037
There was a witness
who saw everything.
247
00:08:36,080 --> 00:08:38,317
Identified the thief, they even
described the getaway car down
248
00:08:38,341 --> 00:08:40,128
to a dent in the right bumper.
We're golden.
249
00:08:40,171 --> 00:08:42,235
- Yeah, but Hitchcock
and Scully forgot to write down
250
00:08:42,259 --> 00:08:44,086
the witness' name
or contact info.
251
00:08:44,130 --> 00:08:46,524
- What?
No, that's insane.
252
00:08:46,567 --> 00:08:48,397
Even they wouldn't
do something that dumb.
253
00:08:48,440 --> 00:08:50,572
- Dumb?
Excuse me.
254
00:08:50,615 --> 00:08:51,966
I don't need this crap.
255
00:08:52,009 --> 00:08:53,596
I could be on the beach
in Figi right now.
256
00:08:53,620 --> 00:08:55,317
- If we go to court,
we're gonna need
257
00:08:55,360 --> 00:08:56,577
the witness to testify.
258
00:08:56,623 --> 00:08:58,711
But now, we have no way
of contacting him.
259
00:08:58,754 --> 00:09:00,408
So there's no case.
260
00:09:00,451 --> 00:09:03,105
How could you not take down
the witness' contact info?
261
00:09:03,149 --> 00:09:06,067
- Well, unlike you dorks,
we don't do everything
262
00:09:06,110 --> 00:09:07,653
"by the book."
- We play by our own rules.
263
00:09:07,677 --> 00:09:09,634
- And we get results.
- Mm-hmm.
264
00:09:09,677 --> 00:09:11,028
- No!
You don't!
265
00:09:11,072 --> 00:09:12,725
That's why we're here!
266
00:09:12,769 --> 00:09:14,379
- So John McClain's advice
wasn't great,
267
00:09:14,423 --> 00:09:16,510
but I have other books.
This one says
268
00:09:16,556 --> 00:09:18,730
to make sure neither
of you has a full diaper.
269
00:09:18,774 --> 00:09:20,341
Feels like we can skip
that part.
270
00:09:20,384 --> 00:09:23,082
- I wouldn't be so sure.
- Dad, come on, all right?
271
00:09:23,125 --> 00:09:24,738
How about this?
272
00:09:24,779 --> 00:09:27,019
Dad, just name one happy memory
that you have with Grandpa.
273
00:09:27,043 --> 00:09:29,326
And don't say the memory you're
going to have at his funeral.
274
00:09:29,350 --> 00:09:32,615
- All right, when I was eight,
he was on shore leave,
275
00:09:32,658 --> 00:09:36,663
and we played catch
in the yard, and that was fun.
276
00:09:36,706 --> 00:09:38,533
- Hey, there you go.
That was great.
277
00:09:38,576 --> 00:09:41,363
And Grandpa, is there a happy
memory you want to share?
278
00:09:41,404 --> 00:09:43,495
- Well, can I pick
the catch thing too?
279
00:09:43,538 --> 00:09:44,821
- Yeah, sure.
- 'Cause that was really
280
00:09:44,845 --> 00:09:46,759
a nice time.
While we were playing,
281
00:09:46,802 --> 00:09:48,629
the neighbor kid
fell off his bike.
282
00:09:48,673 --> 00:09:51,197
- Yeah, he broke his arm.
- You could see the bone.
283
00:09:51,240 --> 00:09:52,721
Do you remember when we went
284
00:09:52,764 --> 00:09:55,201
skiing, and the guy fell off
the lift and busted his leg?
285
00:09:55,245 --> 00:09:56,788
- And you could see the bone.
- It was just, like,
286
00:09:56,812 --> 00:09:59,816
sticking right out of the skin,
and he's, like, screaming.
287
00:09:59,860 --> 00:10:02,166
We were laughing.
- Oh, oh, it was beautiful.
288
00:10:02,210 --> 00:10:03,644
- God, I hope
somebody found him.
289
00:10:03,690 --> 00:10:05,474
- Okay, well, you guys
are both monsters,
290
00:10:05,517 --> 00:10:06,778
but this is going great.
291
00:10:09,302 --> 00:10:10,346
- Yes, yes.
292
00:10:10,392 --> 00:10:11,697
- I know you're being positive,
293
00:10:11,740 --> 00:10:14,221
but I could use
some honest criticism.
294
00:10:14,264 --> 00:10:15,745
- Terry, I'd love
to help, but...
295
00:10:17,745 --> 00:10:20,402
Follow me.
296
00:10:20,445 --> 00:10:21,706
- Hello.
297
00:10:21,750 --> 00:10:23,623
You caught me stretching.
I've been doing this
298
00:10:23,666 --> 00:10:26,234
and nothing else for the
last half hour continuously.
299
00:10:26,277 --> 00:10:27,668
- I saw you watching Terry.
300
00:10:27,712 --> 00:10:29,235
You were finger conducting.
301
00:10:29,278 --> 00:10:31,326
- Fine.
302
00:10:31,369 --> 00:10:32,719
Yes.
303
00:10:32,760 --> 00:10:35,721
I may have overstated
my contempt for the music
304
00:10:35,764 --> 00:10:38,461
they play so that I wouldn't
have to help Jeffords.
305
00:10:38,505 --> 00:10:40,682
- Oh, no, am I so bad,
I can't be helped?
306
00:10:40,725 --> 00:10:43,163
Aw, man, I wanted to play
in the Thanksgiving Day Parade.
307
00:10:43,206 --> 00:10:44,687
Terry loves being
in and among floats.
308
00:10:44,730 --> 00:10:47,168
- You're not bad.
You're maybe even...
309
00:10:47,211 --> 00:10:49,081
Good.
But to make you great,
310
00:10:49,125 --> 00:10:52,259
I'd have to break you down
to nothing.
311
00:10:52,302 --> 00:10:54,610
It would ruin our friendship.
- I can handle criticism.
312
00:10:54,653 --> 00:10:56,394
My daughters criticize me
all the time.
313
00:10:56,437 --> 00:10:58,614
They're so mean now.
Please help me, sir, please!
314
00:10:58,658 --> 00:11:00,701
- Okay.
315
00:11:00,745 --> 00:11:02,485
Give me your flute.
316
00:11:02,529 --> 00:11:04,315
Wrong!
First rule:
317
00:11:04,359 --> 00:11:08,711
never give anyone your flute.
318
00:11:08,754 --> 00:11:11,235
- Hey, babe, how's it going?
- Amazingly well.
319
00:11:11,278 --> 00:11:13,125
My dad and my grandpa are
actually getting along.
320
00:11:13,149 --> 00:11:14,456
They've been catching up
nonstop.
321
00:11:14,499 --> 00:11:15,586
- Aunt Millie?
- Dead.
322
00:11:15,629 --> 00:11:16,763
- Uncle Thomas?
- Dead.
323
00:11:16,806 --> 00:11:17,764
- Aunt Janet?
- Dead.
324
00:11:17,807 --> 00:11:18,764
- Uncle Dean?
- Gay.
325
00:11:18,807 --> 00:11:20,114
- Ooh, good for him.
326
00:11:20,157 --> 00:11:21,591
What about Aunt Lyn?
- Dead.
327
00:11:21,635 --> 00:11:23,615
- Apparently there was a fire
at the family reunion.
328
00:11:23,639 --> 00:11:25,878
Lucky for my Uncle Dean, he
was not welcome at the event.
329
00:11:25,902 --> 00:11:27,860
- Wow. Dark.
- Yeah.
330
00:11:27,903 --> 00:11:30,124
- Well, I'm glad
everything's working out.
331
00:11:30,167 --> 00:11:31,734
Oh, I got to go.
Love you, bye.
332
00:11:31,778 --> 00:11:33,125
- Actually, I got
to go too, so...
333
00:11:34,649 --> 00:11:37,609
- I didn't even think
it was possible to put a cast
334
00:11:37,653 --> 00:11:39,914
on that part of the body.
335
00:11:39,960 --> 00:11:41,788
- That was Amy.
I hung up first.
336
00:11:41,831 --> 00:11:43,711
Looks like things are
still going great in here.
337
00:11:43,745 --> 00:11:46,269
- Yeah, they sure are.
Hey, Dad, toss me a beer.
338
00:11:46,312 --> 00:11:47,663
Bring the heat.
339
00:11:47,706 --> 00:11:49,273
- Whoa!
- Both:
340
00:11:49,317 --> 00:11:50,379
- No, the sex reveal cake!
- Oh.
341
00:11:50,403 --> 00:11:51,580
- Nobody look at the floor!
342
00:11:51,623 --> 00:11:53,190
No one can see
the color of the cake.
343
00:11:55,802 --> 00:11:57,255
- How long are we doing this?
What's the plan?
344
00:11:57,279 --> 00:11:58,326
- I don't know yet!
345
00:12:01,327 --> 00:12:03,113
- Okay, we all heard
the cake splat
346
00:12:03,157 --> 00:12:04,634
on the other side
of the counter,
347
00:12:04,678 --> 00:12:06,134
which means we can probably
assume you can see the color.
348
00:12:06,158 --> 00:12:07,701
- Why does that matter?
- Because the color of the cake
349
00:12:07,725 --> 00:12:09,182
tells us if we're having
a boy or a girl.
350
00:12:09,206 --> 00:12:10,293
- How can that baker tell?
351
00:12:10,336 --> 00:12:11,817
- Because the baker
does the test.
352
00:12:11,860 --> 00:12:13,010
- No, the doctor does the test.
Then the doctor calls
353
00:12:13,034 --> 00:12:14,864
the baker, and the baker
makes the cake.
354
00:12:14,908 --> 00:12:16,884
- Okay, I hate to say this,
but can you start over?
355
00:12:16,908 --> 00:12:18,408
- No, we don't have time.
Just help me fix this.
356
00:12:18,432 --> 00:12:19,782
- You know, it's Roger's fault.
357
00:12:19,826 --> 00:12:21,303
All he had to do
was catch the beer.
358
00:12:21,349 --> 00:12:23,153
- Well, maybe I'd be better
at catch if I played it
359
00:12:23,177 --> 00:12:25,875
more than once growing up.
- Guys, focus up.
360
00:12:25,918 --> 00:12:27,398
We're all getting along,
remember?
361
00:12:27,442 --> 00:12:29,749
Now, we can't see the cake
before Amy, which means we have
362
00:12:29,792 --> 00:12:31,812
to figure out a way to clean
it up without looking at it.
363
00:12:31,836 --> 00:12:33,796
We have to "Birdbox" it.
364
00:12:33,840 --> 00:12:36,144
- And "Birdbox" is the bakery.
- No, "Birdbox" is a movie
365
00:12:36,190 --> 00:12:37,990
where people aren't allowed
to look at things.
366
00:12:38,018 --> 00:12:40,716
Just put on these blindfolds
and help me clean it up.
367
00:12:40,759 --> 00:12:42,979
- I "Birdbox-ed"
the stewardess in Sweden once.
368
00:12:43,023 --> 00:12:44,023
- Dad!
369
00:12:45,024 --> 00:12:47,677
Okay, that should be all of it.
370
00:12:47,721 --> 00:12:49,985
I think it's safe
to take off our blindfolds...
371
00:12:50,028 --> 00:12:51,029
Oh,!
372
00:12:51,072 --> 00:12:53,947
No, no!
Oh, God!
373
00:12:55,076 --> 00:12:57,341
What happened?
We were so careful.
374
00:12:57,384 --> 00:12:59,038
Here comes the mop.
375
00:12:59,081 --> 00:13:00,214
- Bag.
376
00:13:00,255 --> 00:13:01,389
- This is hard.
- Yeah.
377
00:13:01,432 --> 00:13:04,173
I could use a beer, you know?
378
00:13:04,216 --> 00:13:05,826
- Oh, oh.
- You okay?
379
00:13:05,870 --> 00:13:07,047
- The cake was blue.
380
00:13:07,090 --> 00:13:09,264
You're having a boy.
It's the curse.
381
00:13:09,308 --> 00:13:11,181
- No.
No, no, no, there's no curse.
382
00:13:11,225 --> 00:13:13,793
Look, we can still fix this.
All we have to do is clean
383
00:13:13,836 --> 00:13:16,099
every inch of this room,
and then bake a gourmet cake.
384
00:13:16,143 --> 00:13:18,057
- No one can do all that
in two hours.
385
00:13:18,100 --> 00:13:20,190
- Wrong, Dad.
386
00:13:20,234 --> 00:13:21,451
There is one who can.
387
00:13:24,238 --> 00:13:27,023
- Hello, fellas.
Let's get to work.
388
00:13:29,243 --> 00:13:31,504
- Oh, hey.
I got something.
389
00:13:31,548 --> 00:13:33,985
There was a security camera by
the Carroll Street brownstone.
390
00:13:34,028 --> 00:13:35,181
- And it got footage
of the perps?
391
00:13:35,205 --> 00:13:36,772
- No, but it caught
Scully and Hitchcock
392
00:13:36,816 --> 00:13:38,182
interviewing the witness.
- All right.
393
00:13:38,206 --> 00:13:39,860
Let's start canvassing
the neighborhood,
394
00:13:39,904 --> 00:13:41,187
see if anybody
recognizes that guy.
395
00:13:41,211 --> 00:13:42,211
- Yeah.
396
00:13:42,254 --> 00:13:44,258
- Wait!
397
00:13:44,301 --> 00:13:46,432
- What the hell?
- Sorry, I didn't want to run,
398
00:13:46,475 --> 00:13:48,216
and that was the only way
to stop the doors.
399
00:13:48,260 --> 00:13:50,786
- It wasn't, and it didn't.
- It worked, we're here.
400
00:13:50,830 --> 00:13:52,503
- Please, don't go looking
for that witness.
401
00:13:52,527 --> 00:13:54,113
- We're just trying
to fix your screw-up.
402
00:13:54,135 --> 00:13:56,225
- We didn't screw up.
The witness gave us his name,
403
00:13:56,269 --> 00:13:58,836
but he asked us not to write it
down because he's undocumented.
404
00:13:58,879 --> 00:14:01,884
- So he's scared to show up
to testify at the courthouse
405
00:14:01,927 --> 00:14:03,427
because he didn't want
to be detained by ICE.
406
00:14:03,451 --> 00:14:04,711
- Damn it.
- You know,
407
00:14:04,754 --> 00:14:06,517
that keeps lots of immigrants
from helping cops.
408
00:14:06,541 --> 00:14:08,195
- Yeah, we know that.
We're just surprised
409
00:14:08,238 --> 00:14:09,849
that you know that.
- That's insulting.
410
00:14:09,892 --> 00:14:11,522
I'm very concerned
with immigration issues.
411
00:14:11,546 --> 00:14:13,504
- And I've dated
my fair share of spicy...
412
00:14:13,548 --> 00:14:15,245
- No!
- Scully said the nice thing.
413
00:14:15,288 --> 00:14:17,115
You don't need
to go past it, Hitchcock.
414
00:14:17,158 --> 00:14:19,815
- Okay, I know you need help
and time is tight,
415
00:14:19,859 --> 00:14:21,445
but I see there is blue cake
on the floor,
416
00:14:21,469 --> 00:14:23,774
and I know what that means,
vis-à-vis the sex of the baby.
417
00:14:23,817 --> 00:14:27,038
So before we do anything,
I'm going to need a minute.
418
00:14:28,475 --> 00:14:30,519
Sorry for all the weeping
and the weird snort noise
419
00:14:30,565 --> 00:14:32,086
I made at the end.
It's genetic.
420
00:14:32,130 --> 00:14:34,480
Now, Jake, grab the mop,
you're on cleanup.
421
00:14:34,524 --> 00:14:36,177
Admiral, you're
making the batter.
422
00:14:36,221 --> 00:14:38,442
Captain, you're on
frosting duty.
423
00:14:39,615 --> 00:14:41,402
- Okay, Amy just texted.
424
00:14:41,445 --> 00:14:43,926
She's gonna be here
any second, so hide that thing.
425
00:14:43,970 --> 00:14:45,493
- The...
426
00:14:45,536 --> 00:14:48,931
Oh.
- Dad, that is so noticeable.
427
00:14:48,975 --> 00:14:50,105
- Nuh-uh, it's awesome.
428
00:14:50,149 --> 00:14:51,475
- All right, everybody,
act normal.
429
00:14:51,499 --> 00:14:52,586
Act normal.
430
00:14:52,629 --> 00:14:54,326
- Hey, guys.
431
00:14:54,370 --> 00:14:56,197
- Hey, welcome home.
432
00:14:56,243 --> 00:14:58,898
I'd like you to meet
my grandpa, Walter.
433
00:14:58,941 --> 00:15:00,332
- It's so nice to meet you.
434
00:15:00,375 --> 00:15:02,118
- Hello, things are normal here.
435
00:15:02,162 --> 00:15:03,815
- Yeah, everything's
totally normal...
436
00:15:03,859 --> 00:15:05,163
Back here too, behind the chair.
437
00:15:05,206 --> 00:15:06,947
- Yup, and that was
a normal thing to say.
438
00:15:06,993 --> 00:15:08,298
Are things normal with you, Amy?
439
00:15:08,341 --> 00:15:09,604
- Sure.
- Cool.
440
00:15:09,647 --> 00:15:11,952
- I'm going to go get ready
for the party.
441
00:15:11,998 --> 00:15:13,216
- Oh, fun.
442
00:15:17,003 --> 00:15:19,134
Oh, my God, I can't believe
we pulled it off.
443
00:15:19,177 --> 00:15:20,658
Charles, we owe it all to you.
444
00:15:20,701 --> 00:15:23,269
- Stop, it was an honor to cook
and clean with all of you.
445
00:15:23,312 --> 00:15:26,403
- Boy, Jake is so lucky
to have you as his butler.
446
00:15:26,447 --> 00:15:27,403
- Oh, he's not...
- Thank you.
447
00:15:27,447 --> 00:15:28,490
- Oh.
448
00:15:28,536 --> 00:15:30,407
- I'm so glad you're helping me.
449
00:15:30,451 --> 00:15:31,885
Maybe I won't blow it after all.
450
00:15:31,931 --> 00:15:33,168
- Oh, you'll do
plenty of blowing...
451
00:15:33,192 --> 00:15:34,498
Of that flute.
Now, let's go.
452
00:15:34,542 --> 00:15:36,500
A five, six, seven, eight.
453
00:15:37,543 --> 00:15:39,110
- Stop.
454
00:15:39,153 --> 00:15:41,331
The nod meant start now,
not start one second later.
455
00:15:41,375 --> 00:15:43,072
Again.
Five, six, seven, eight.
456
00:15:44,639 --> 00:15:45,639
- Stop.
457
00:15:47,553 --> 00:15:49,620
Are you playing "The Muffin
Man" or "The Garbage Man"?
458
00:15:49,644 --> 00:15:51,341
- Huh?
- Do you know the Garbage Man?
459
00:15:51,384 --> 00:15:52,427
Because I do.
460
00:15:52,471 --> 00:15:53,908
Because I'm looking
right at him.
461
00:15:53,951 --> 00:15:55,649
Again.
Five, six, seven, eight.
462
00:15:57,956 --> 00:16:00,176
- Bum, bum, bum, badum, bum, bum
463
00:16:02,657 --> 00:16:04,267
Again.
464
00:16:06,312 --> 00:16:07,399
Again.
465
00:16:07,442 --> 00:16:09,053
Bum, bum, bum, badum, bum, bum
466
00:16:11,230 --> 00:16:12,493
Da, da, da, da
467
00:16:12,534 --> 00:16:14,058
Why did you stop playing,
Garbage Man?
468
00:16:14,101 --> 00:16:15,538
- I need some water.
469
00:16:15,581 --> 00:16:17,385
- What you need to do is
keep practicing, Garbage Man.
470
00:16:17,411 --> 00:16:18,649
- I don't have any more saliva.
- And I don't have any more
471
00:16:18,673 --> 00:16:21,283
time for your excuses,
Garbage Man.
472
00:16:21,326 --> 00:16:23,154
Now play again.
Five, six...
473
00:16:23,197 --> 00:16:24,548
- I don't want
your help anymore!
474
00:16:24,591 --> 00:16:28,942
I'm not a garbage man!
I'm a muffin man!
475
00:16:30,206 --> 00:16:31,599
- Attention, everyone.
476
00:16:31,642 --> 00:16:33,209
Thank you all so much
for coming.
477
00:16:33,253 --> 00:16:34,384
Please gather around.
478
00:16:34,427 --> 00:16:36,908
We're going to cut the cake
and find out
479
00:16:36,951 --> 00:16:40,649
what our baby's whole
downstairs situation is.
480
00:16:40,695 --> 00:16:42,523
- Why the accent?
- I don't know.
481
00:16:42,566 --> 00:16:44,066
I did so bad.
I should have let you talk.
482
00:16:44,090 --> 00:16:45,240
- Yeah, you should have.
- Okay.
483
00:16:45,264 --> 00:16:46,307
- I love you.
- Oh.
484
00:16:46,351 --> 00:16:47,397
- Okay, let's do this.
485
00:16:47,441 --> 00:16:49,225
Here we go.
486
00:16:49,269 --> 00:16:52,620
- All right, we are having a...
487
00:16:52,663 --> 00:16:54,576
Green.
488
00:16:54,620 --> 00:16:56,144
Oh, my God.
What's inside of me?
489
00:16:56,187 --> 00:16:58,581
- No, you just cut a bad slice.
Here, I'll get a good one.
490
00:16:58,625 --> 00:17:00,278
- I guess the bakery
must have messed up.
491
00:17:00,322 --> 00:17:01,629
- What are you talking about?
492
00:17:01,672 --> 00:17:03,500
Roger's the one that
added the food coloring.
493
00:17:03,543 --> 00:17:04,934
- Well, you mixed the batter.
494
00:17:04,980 --> 00:17:06,588
- Wait, did you guys
bake that cake?
495
00:17:06,634 --> 00:17:10,201
- Well, we just,
you could say that...
496
00:17:10,246 --> 00:17:11,595
- Jake?
497
00:17:11,637 --> 00:17:13,249
- Okay, fine.
Yes, we baked it.
498
00:17:13,291 --> 00:17:15,121
I'm so sorry.
I'll explain everything later.
499
00:17:15,163 --> 00:17:16,482
Dad, please stop
cutting the cake.
500
00:17:16,511 --> 00:17:17,708
- I'm trying to find
a good slice.
501
00:17:17,730 --> 00:17:20,385
- There is no good slice!
You screwed it up!
502
00:17:20,430 --> 00:17:21,910
You're a screw-up!
- Yeah?
503
00:17:21,951 --> 00:17:23,973
Well, if I'm a screw up,
it's 'cause you screwed me up.
504
00:17:23,999 --> 00:17:25,305
You screw-up.
- Screw you.
505
00:17:25,346 --> 00:17:27,307
I'm leaving.
- Wait, wait, no, don't go!
506
00:17:27,348 --> 00:17:28,351
We reversed the curse!
507
00:17:28,394 --> 00:17:29,587
Don't reverse the curse reverse!
508
00:17:29,613 --> 00:17:31,222
- Actually, Jake, I'm going too.
509
00:17:31,267 --> 00:17:32,573
- What?
No, why would you go?
510
00:17:32,615 --> 00:17:34,182
- I need to go to the hospital.
511
00:17:34,227 --> 00:17:35,356
I cut my thumb off.
512
00:17:35,402 --> 00:17:36,968
- Again?
- The other one.
513
00:17:37,010 --> 00:17:38,098
All:
514
00:17:38,144 --> 00:17:40,405
- Oh, God.
- Oh, God.
515
00:17:40,450 --> 00:17:43,018
Ah...
Get the "Dino Bites."
516
00:17:45,714 --> 00:17:48,197
- Hey, how are you feeling?
How's the thumb?
517
00:17:48,240 --> 00:17:50,547
- Great, looks perfect.
Like nothing ever happened.
518
00:17:50,589 --> 00:17:53,594
- It's the other thumb, Dad.
- Oh, no, yeah, that looks bad.
519
00:17:53,635 --> 00:17:55,615
- The doctor said it might
take a long time to heal,
520
00:17:55,637 --> 00:17:57,554
and that it might
never be as long again.
521
00:17:57,596 --> 00:17:59,817
- My thumb?
I don't care.
522
00:17:59,861 --> 00:18:01,602
Is my dad here?
- No.
523
00:18:01,644 --> 00:18:04,431
I called him and he said...
524
00:18:04,472 --> 00:18:05,910
How do I put this?
525
00:18:05,952 --> 00:18:08,565
- That I'm a useless screw-up
and he's done with me?
526
00:18:08,607 --> 00:18:10,785
- Yeah, something exactly
like that, verbatim, sure.
527
00:18:10,826 --> 00:18:12,787
Look, I'm really sorry
that I forced this
528
00:18:12,828 --> 00:18:15,442
whole reunion on you.
I think our family might be
529
00:18:15,483 --> 00:18:16,895
cursed, and I'm going
to be a bad dad.
530
00:18:16,921 --> 00:18:18,617
- No, I was wrong.
531
00:18:18,662 --> 00:18:22,797
There's no curse.
My dad is just a selfish dick.
532
00:18:22,838 --> 00:18:24,842
And I was too.
533
00:18:24,884 --> 00:18:27,800
All the other Peralta dads,
we probably just learned it
534
00:18:27,845 --> 00:18:30,107
from each other.
- Or it's just in our genes.
535
00:18:30,152 --> 00:18:31,893
- No, you proved that wrong.
536
00:18:31,934 --> 00:18:34,676
You care, and you do the work.
537
00:18:34,721 --> 00:18:38,550
You're reading parenting books
before your kid is even born.
538
00:18:38,595 --> 00:18:41,118
You tried to get me
and Dad back together.
539
00:18:41,163 --> 00:18:43,470
Hell, you even fished
my thumb out of the cake.
540
00:18:43,511 --> 00:18:44,688
- Yeah, that was gross.
541
00:18:44,730 --> 00:18:46,057
- You're so excited
about having a kid,
542
00:18:46,079 --> 00:18:47,646
you're having
a sex reveal party.
543
00:18:47,691 --> 00:18:49,213
I never did anything like that,
544
00:18:49,258 --> 00:18:50,825
except that one time
in Amsterdam.
545
00:18:50,866 --> 00:18:52,653
- I really wish you'd stop
bringing that up.
546
00:18:52,694 --> 00:18:55,001
- Jake, you're going
to be a great dad.
547
00:18:55,046 --> 00:18:57,832
And your son's gonna love you.
548
00:18:57,875 --> 00:18:59,528
- Thanks.
549
00:18:59,573 --> 00:19:02,053
And I think you're going
to make a real good grandpa.
550
00:19:02,096 --> 00:19:03,229
- Hey,
551
00:19:03,270 --> 00:19:05,838
who's got two surgically
reattached thumbs
552
00:19:05,883 --> 00:19:08,232
and is super proud of his son?
553
00:19:08,277 --> 00:19:10,018
- Oh, you don't have to...
554
00:19:10,059 --> 00:19:11,237
- This guy...
555
00:19:15,240 --> 00:19:16,633
- My boss is furious.
556
00:19:16,675 --> 00:19:18,200
You ruined my 25th birthday.
557
00:19:18,242 --> 00:19:19,808
I want those guys punished.
558
00:19:19,854 --> 00:19:21,636
- Understood.
I'll talk to them right now.
559
00:19:21,682 --> 00:19:24,596
Without that witness,
the DA has nothing.
560
00:19:24,641 --> 00:19:26,163
Kurm is pissed.
- It's true.
561
00:19:26,208 --> 00:19:27,923
He kept calling you guys
the human centipede.
562
00:19:27,949 --> 00:19:29,603
- Because we have
our heads up our asses.
563
00:19:29,644 --> 00:19:31,755
Yes, we've heard that before.
- I never thought I'd say this,
564
00:19:31,778 --> 00:19:33,057
but you guys did
the right thing.
565
00:19:33,084 --> 00:19:34,758
- Unfortunately, Kurm
wants you disciplined.
566
00:19:34,780 --> 00:19:36,000
So effective tomorrow,
567
00:19:36,044 --> 00:19:38,000
you're each getting one week
paid suspension.
568
00:19:38,046 --> 00:19:40,614
- Like vacation?
- You deserve this punishment!
569
00:19:40,655 --> 00:19:42,572
- It's punishment
where you don't have to work.
570
00:19:42,615 --> 00:19:43,721
- And we can go
anywhere we like?
571
00:19:43,747 --> 00:19:45,269
- You can go to hell
for all I care!
572
00:19:45,314 --> 00:19:47,055
- Or to a resort
where you're being scammed.
573
00:19:47,096 --> 00:19:48,185
- Figi.
Good idea.
574
00:19:48,230 --> 00:19:49,250
- Now, get out of my face!
575
00:19:49,275 --> 00:19:50,711
Have fun.
576
00:19:53,278 --> 00:19:54,713
- Next.
577
00:19:54,758 --> 00:19:57,673
- Hi, my name is Terry Jeffords.
578
00:19:57,718 --> 00:19:59,633
And I don't know how
this is going to go...
579
00:19:59,674 --> 00:20:00,980
- Wait!
580
00:20:01,025 --> 00:20:02,375
- Sir.
581
00:20:02,416 --> 00:20:04,221
- I'm Captain Raymond Holt
of the 99th precinct,
582
00:20:04,246 --> 00:20:05,942
and I need to tell you
about this man.
583
00:20:05,987 --> 00:20:07,945
Now, the audition piece
he's about to play may not
584
00:20:07,989 --> 00:20:10,772
be technically perfect.
In fact, it may hurt your ears.
585
00:20:10,817 --> 00:20:13,079
You may consider it
an insult to music.
586
00:20:13,124 --> 00:20:14,691
You may whisper to each other,
587
00:20:14,733 --> 00:20:15,951
"'Muffin Man'?
Pssh!
588
00:20:15,997 --> 00:20:17,605
More like Garbage Man."
589
00:20:17,651 --> 00:20:19,259
- Come on.
- But you would be wrong.
590
00:20:19,305 --> 00:20:21,611
This man has
taught me something.
591
00:20:21,653 --> 00:20:24,743
He's taught me that music
is about heart and soul.
592
00:20:24,788 --> 00:20:28,616
It's about perseverance.
Despite everything
593
00:20:28,662 --> 00:20:31,882
I put him through,
he showed up here today.
594
00:20:31,924 --> 00:20:35,364
And you would be a fool
not to put him in your band.
595
00:20:35,406 --> 00:20:37,625
- Thank you, Captain.
Lieutenant?
596
00:20:37,671 --> 00:20:38,887
What instrument do you play?
597
00:20:38,932 --> 00:20:40,193
- The flute.
- You're hired.
598
00:20:40,239 --> 00:20:41,805
- What?
I haven't even played.
599
00:20:41,847 --> 00:20:43,305
- You're the only flute
who auditioned.
600
00:20:43,327 --> 00:20:44,286
Welcome to the band.
601
00:20:44,328 --> 00:20:46,114
- Yes!
I did it!
602
00:20:47,420 --> 00:20:48,810
- Hey.
How's your dad doing?
603
00:20:48,855 --> 00:20:50,310
- Well, the doctor
said he'll be okay,
604
00:20:50,336 --> 00:20:52,118
but his hands are
basically claws now.
605
00:20:52,163 --> 00:20:53,704
I don't know why
they think that's okay.
606
00:20:53,730 --> 00:20:55,776
Hey, listen, I'm sorry
the cake was green.
607
00:20:55,817 --> 00:20:57,038
- It's okay.
608
00:20:57,079 --> 00:20:58,711
I'll love our little Shrek
no matter what.
609
00:20:58,733 --> 00:20:59,823
- Oh, my God.
That's right.
610
00:20:59,865 --> 00:21:01,192
You still don't know
the sex of the baby.
611
00:21:01,214 --> 00:21:02,781
With all the craziness,
I almost forgot.
612
00:21:02,826 --> 00:21:04,698
Emphasis on "almost."
- What?
613
00:21:04,740 --> 00:21:06,961
- Well, I got another cake
just for the two of us.
614
00:21:07,002 --> 00:21:09,048
- Jake, that's so sweet.
615
00:21:09,093 --> 00:21:11,835
- Here we go.
- I'm so excited.
616
00:21:11,877 --> 00:21:13,239
It's empty.
There's no cake inside.
617
00:21:13,270 --> 00:21:14,663
- What?
Where'd it go?
618
00:21:14,708 --> 00:21:16,317
- Hey, guys.
Do you have any milk?
619
00:21:16,362 --> 00:21:18,318
We're having a boy?
620
00:21:18,364 --> 00:21:19,843
We're having a boy!
621
00:21:19,885 --> 00:21:21,976
- Hey, do you have milk or not?
622
00:21:22,019 --> 00:21:23,238
- Jeez.
- God.
623
00:21:23,280 --> 00:21:25,240
- Fremulon.
624
00:21:25,284 --> 00:21:27,286
- Not a doctor.
- Shh!
47245
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