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Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:00:00,078 --> 00:00:01,851 Previously, on "Brockmire"... 2 00:00:01,943 --> 00:00:03,943 I know how to get people come to basball game. 3 00:00:04,028 --> 00:00:06,004 Once I prove it, you wanna higher... 4 00:00:06,089 --> 00:00:07,894 something company Jules James promotion. 5 00:00:07,986 --> 00:00:11,109 Food shortage riots have hit Georgia and South Carolina 6 00:00:11,193 --> 00:00:14,109 as hungry moms sweep through the streets looking for food. 7 00:00:14,193 --> 00:00:16,843 The owners will never let me enact any real change. 8 00:00:16,927 --> 00:00:19,476 Since when do you need permission for anything? 9 00:00:19,560 --> 00:00:20,900 Just follow your instincts and make 10 00:00:20,984 --> 00:00:22,226 a lot of noise when you do. 11 00:00:22,318 --> 00:00:25,007 - I'm dating George Breath. - Seriously. 12 00:00:33,172 --> 00:00:37,192 Hey, guys. It's Jules James coming at you live from Philly 13 00:00:37,284 --> 00:00:39,369 on the Fourth of Jul-y, 14 00:00:39,453 --> 00:00:44,132 and we are here at another Jules James promotion sellout, 15 00:00:44,228 --> 00:00:45,886 and I'm working with the Goat. 16 00:00:45,971 --> 00:00:48,790 That's right, world-famous escape artist, 17 00:00:48,875 --> 00:00:51,127 the Great Tomas is here! 18 00:00:51,212 --> 00:00:53,296 Now, people have tried for years 19 00:00:53,433 --> 00:00:54,712 to get him to come out of retirement, 20 00:00:54,796 --> 00:00:56,786 but nobody can say no to Jules, right? 21 00:00:56,870 --> 00:00:58,955 - Right. - Last time we saw you, 22 00:00:59,039 --> 00:01:02,058 you were locked in a safe tied to a railroad track 23 00:01:02,142 --> 00:01:04,360 right before two freight trains collided. 24 00:01:04,444 --> 00:01:06,125 Tell us what you have planned today. 25 00:01:06,346 --> 00:01:09,242 First I'd like to dedicate today to my late wife 26 00:01:09,444 --> 00:01:10,799 and to all the other survivors 27 00:01:10,884 --> 00:01:12,203 still trying to get out of Scottsdale. 28 00:01:12,287 --> 00:01:14,812 Yeah, super sad, which is why today's uplifting stunt 29 00:01:14,897 --> 00:01:17,031 is gonna be just what this country needs. 30 00:01:17,116 --> 00:01:18,444 Take us through it. 31 00:01:18,647 --> 00:01:21,179 Um, well, to start things off, 32 00:01:21,335 --> 00:01:24,846 the gospel choir from the Triumphant Heart Baptist Church 33 00:01:24,931 --> 00:01:26,482 will be singing "America the Beautiful." 34 00:01:26,566 --> 00:01:30,553 USA, USA, right? USA. And then what? 35 00:01:30,637 --> 00:01:33,429 I... I will be trapped in a box surrounded by 36 00:01:33,514 --> 00:01:34,642 fireworks... 37 00:01:34,727 --> 00:01:37,446 Which will explode just as the song crescendos. 38 00:01:37,630 --> 00:01:40,416 All on our nation's birthday. 39 00:01:40,586 --> 00:01:43,640 Well, Tommy, see you on the flip side? 40 00:01:43,854 --> 00:01:45,367 Good-bye, everybody. 41 00:01:48,724 --> 00:01:50,108 How about that, fam? 42 00:01:50,193 --> 00:01:52,773 Now, don't forget to swipe up so you can see 43 00:01:52,858 --> 00:01:54,644 my entire calendar for the rest of the season. 44 00:01:54,728 --> 00:01:57,429 I'm once again doing this for all 30 teams. 45 00:01:57,629 --> 00:01:59,375 Happy Fourth. 46 00:02:13,980 --> 00:02:15,331 There's my superstar. 47 00:02:16,683 --> 00:02:17,937 Happiness? 48 00:02:18,106 --> 00:02:21,292 Amazing, just amazing, Jules. 49 00:02:21,562 --> 00:02:22,812 We're sold out again. 50 00:02:22,945 --> 00:02:23,973 Every other game today 51 00:02:24,057 --> 00:02:26,776 is getting interrupted to carry this. 52 00:02:28,952 --> 00:02:31,571 Philadelphia, please give a warm welcome 53 00:02:31,656 --> 00:02:34,183 to the Triumphant Heart Gospel Choir. 54 00:02:34,320 --> 00:02:36,519 They will be singing "America the Beautiful." 55 00:02:36,603 --> 00:02:40,023 This song is dedicated to all the deceased in Scottsdale 56 00:02:40,107 --> 00:02:42,140 and The Disputed Lands. 57 00:02:42,427 --> 00:02:46,570 ♪ Oh beautiful ♪ 58 00:02:46,807 --> 00:02:50,699 ♪ For spacious skies ♪ 59 00:02:51,007 --> 00:02:55,071 ♪ For amber waves ♪ 60 00:02:55,155 --> 00:02:58,765 ♪ Of grain ♪ 61 00:02:58,925 --> 00:03:00,310 Ladies and gentlemen, 62 00:03:00,394 --> 00:03:03,579 please put your hands together for the Great Tomas. 63 00:03:06,611 --> 00:03:08,363 Have you considered my offer? 64 00:03:08,502 --> 00:03:10,586 I'd love to have you work for me full-time. 65 00:03:10,670 --> 00:03:14,324 Freddie, this is an open relationship. 66 00:03:14,408 --> 00:03:17,994 You're free to see other promoters, but why would you? 67 00:03:21,515 --> 00:03:28,271 ♪ Above the fruited plains ♪ 68 00:03:28,355 --> 00:03:32,421 ♪ America ♪ 69 00:03:32,606 --> 00:03:36,093 ♪ America ♪ 70 00:03:36,192 --> 00:03:39,265 Getting the kids to do the honors was a nice touch. 71 00:03:39,462 --> 00:03:40,502 I'm all about the details. 72 00:03:42,803 --> 00:03:45,914 ♪ And crown thy good ♪ 73 00:03:46,031 --> 00:03:49,592 ♪ With brotherhood ♪ 74 00:03:49,676 --> 00:03:53,463 ♪ From sea to shining sea. 75 00:03:53,547 --> 00:03:55,750 Is that dynamite? 76 00:03:55,930 --> 00:03:57,875 I only get the good shit, Freddie. 77 00:04:00,925 --> 00:04:05,703 All; Five, four, three, two, one! 78 00:04:13,533 --> 00:04:14,935 Ahh! 79 00:04:15,860 --> 00:04:17,278 Ahh! 80 00:04:20,463 --> 00:04:22,615 - I hate this song! - Shit. 81 00:04:22,948 --> 00:04:25,934 I had no inkling of Tomas' mental state. 82 00:04:26,066 --> 00:04:28,730 I suppose I could have seen the signs on Twitter. 83 00:04:28,815 --> 00:04:32,031 His last Facebook post 84 00:04:32,116 --> 00:04:34,132 could be interpreted as a suicide note, 85 00:04:34,220 --> 00:04:35,446 but that's a lot of 86 00:04:35,531 --> 00:04:37,306 Monday-morning quarterbacking going on. 87 00:04:37,390 --> 00:04:39,976 I have just been trying to hug 88 00:04:40,060 --> 00:04:41,944 as many of the traumatized as possible, 89 00:04:42,028 --> 00:04:43,948 and to the families who had to witness this... 90 00:04:45,491 --> 00:04:48,250 It's a sad day for America and for baseball. 91 00:04:48,401 --> 00:04:50,019 - Ms. James... - Is it true that the owners 92 00:04:50,103 --> 00:04:52,021 have canceled all your upcoming promotions? 93 00:04:52,105 --> 00:04:53,322 How could you do this to baseball? 94 00:04:53,406 --> 00:04:55,825 Anyone who knows me knows how much I love baseball. 95 00:04:55,909 --> 00:04:57,293 Ms. James, why do you hate America? 96 00:04:57,377 --> 00:05:00,062 If that's true, then why did Jim Brockmire have no comment? 97 00:05:00,146 --> 00:05:01,581 Julia... 98 00:05:01,665 --> 00:05:02,929 *BROCKMIRE* Season 04 Episode 03 99 00:05:03,021 --> 00:05:04,286 Episode Title: "Low and Away" Aired on: April 01, 2020 100 00:05:04,568 --> 00:05:06,483 Hey there, America. It's me, your friend, 101 00:05:06,568 --> 00:05:08,123 Gatling Gary, and I got a problem. 102 00:05:08,208 --> 00:05:10,841 I got too many guns! How many guns? 103 00:05:11,011 --> 00:05:13,863 Well, I got this gun, this gun, this gun, 104 00:05:13,947 --> 00:05:15,598 and even go this little bitch gun! 105 00:05:15,682 --> 00:05:17,481 Look at it. I got too many guns! 106 00:05:17,566 --> 00:05:18,841 But that's not all we got. 107 00:05:18,936 --> 00:05:20,735 Are you tired of your armor-piercing rounds 108 00:05:20,820 --> 00:05:22,138 not piercing the armor of all those 109 00:05:22,222 --> 00:05:23,560 ATF tanks that are coming on your property? 110 00:05:23,644 --> 00:05:26,330 We got Uncle Uriah's uranium super bullets! 111 00:05:26,415 --> 00:05:28,343 They will a mother up! 112 00:05:29,696 --> 00:05:32,115 We got flak jackets, custom-tailored flak jackets 113 00:05:32,199 --> 00:05:33,678 for formal occasions, weddings, funerals, 114 00:05:33,762 --> 00:05:35,246 outlawed gay wedding, cock fights, 115 00:05:35,331 --> 00:05:37,115 gangbangs, bar mitzvahs, and, of course, 116 00:05:37,200 --> 00:05:39,118 we got all the above in kids' sizes! 117 00:05:39,203 --> 00:05:42,323 And we've got water-siphoning kits, chemical toilets, 118 00:05:42,408 --> 00:05:43,725 lime for body disposal, 119 00:05:43,810 --> 00:05:45,294 erectile dysfunction injections. 120 00:05:45,379 --> 00:05:47,302 We've got it all! But what do I really got? 121 00:05:47,387 --> 00:05:49,264 I got too many guns! 122 00:05:49,349 --> 00:05:50,810 If you don't come down and buy some of these guns, 123 00:05:50,894 --> 00:05:53,446 I'm gonna blow my brains out! I'm not kidding! 124 00:05:53,531 --> 00:05:56,683 I'm gonna do it in front of my kids, so come on down! 125 00:05:56,768 --> 00:05:58,254 Gatling Gary's Guns not responsible for any crime 126 00:05:58,338 --> 00:05:59,317 committed with Gatling Gary's gun. 127 00:05:59,402 --> 00:06:00,787 Gun companies are not responsible for Gatling Gary 128 00:06:00,871 --> 00:06:03,060 actually blowing his brains out in front of his family. 129 00:06:03,161 --> 00:06:06,297 Content fatigue, it's real, and it's a problem. 130 00:06:06,497 --> 00:06:08,348 Millions suffer from the anxiety, 131 00:06:08,478 --> 00:06:11,217 inability to focus, and irritability brought on 132 00:06:11,302 --> 00:06:12,955 by mild to moderate CF. 133 00:06:13,039 --> 00:06:14,552 Sure, we could just watch... 134 00:06:14,644 --> 00:06:16,996 Carol, turn that shit off. 135 00:06:17,081 --> 00:06:19,132 That Charles fella called again. 136 00:06:19,217 --> 00:06:20,868 I got his number for you. 137 00:06:20,953 --> 00:06:24,639 Won't be needing it. Just keep telling him I'm busy. 138 00:06:24,735 --> 00:06:26,687 I thought you were dealing with that rash. 139 00:06:26,772 --> 00:06:29,371 Well, the bus to Canada doesn't come 140 00:06:29,456 --> 00:06:31,240 through here anymore, so I haven't been able 141 00:06:31,324 --> 00:06:35,013 to get my swine shingle pills, but it's fine. 142 00:06:35,098 --> 00:06:37,052 Really? That thing was covering half your body 143 00:06:37,163 --> 00:06:38,536 before you got on your meds. 144 00:06:38,621 --> 00:06:42,216 I fought my fight. The rash won. 145 00:06:42,761 --> 00:06:45,112 Tour's here. I won't be back later. 146 00:06:45,197 --> 00:06:48,016 You'll lock up? Oh, God. 147 00:06:48,341 --> 00:06:50,020 God, Carol! 148 00:06:50,449 --> 00:06:52,434 Second one this week, 149 00:06:52,564 --> 00:06:54,415 and I'm still standing. 150 00:06:54,710 --> 00:06:56,045 It's fine. 151 00:07:08,837 --> 00:07:12,423 It turns out spraying toxic chemicals underground 152 00:07:12,508 --> 00:07:14,460 to dissolve shale into a natural gas 153 00:07:14,545 --> 00:07:16,796 has some unforeseen consequences, 154 00:07:16,881 --> 00:07:20,301 but the most impressive consequence of fracking 155 00:07:20,386 --> 00:07:23,438 is our eternal flame here. 156 00:07:23,643 --> 00:07:26,192 Beneath where we stand, 157 00:07:26,277 --> 00:07:31,749 rages of fire that will outlast all humanity. 158 00:07:32,432 --> 00:07:35,251 'Kay, now time for the burning of regrets. 159 00:07:35,554 --> 00:07:36,856 Let's line up. 160 00:07:37,084 --> 00:07:38,635 The flame is green for a reason. 161 00:07:38,720 --> 00:07:40,871 It offers pure catharsis 162 00:07:40,968 --> 00:07:44,321 incinerating whatever it is you've come to burn, 163 00:07:44,484 --> 00:07:47,809 marriage certificates, love letters, a bad prom photo, 164 00:07:47,934 --> 00:07:49,602 but please no dead pets. 165 00:07:52,806 --> 00:07:56,825 The fire burns quickly, but the smell tends to linger. 166 00:07:57,106 --> 00:08:00,419 We do request a $50 donation to go toward flame upkeep 167 00:08:00,504 --> 00:08:04,223 and the completion of our visitor's center. 168 00:08:04,308 --> 00:08:06,527 The flame is booked up for Halloween parties 169 00:08:06,612 --> 00:08:09,764 years into the future, but the visitor's center 170 00:08:09,849 --> 00:08:13,903 will make this place a year-round destination. 171 00:08:23,410 --> 00:08:26,091 $100? Do you have anything to burn? 172 00:08:26,226 --> 00:08:28,195 A whole day, apparently. 173 00:08:30,627 --> 00:08:32,678 This is why you're too busy to call me back? 174 00:08:34,975 --> 00:08:36,315 Life's been pretty good. 175 00:08:36,400 --> 00:08:37,573 Career is great. 176 00:08:37,658 --> 00:08:39,602 Um, I'm divorcing Denise, though. 177 00:08:39,686 --> 00:08:41,637 Aww, that's a shame. I really liked her. 178 00:08:41,721 --> 00:08:42,772 Oh, not that Denise. 179 00:08:42,856 --> 00:08:46,346 This... that divorce was... five years ago? 180 00:08:46,431 --> 00:08:48,690 I'm also paying alimony to a Patrice. 181 00:08:49,653 --> 00:08:51,337 - I have a type. - Mm. 182 00:08:51,541 --> 00:08:52,571 No, thank you. 183 00:08:52,656 --> 00:08:55,341 I don't really... oh, that was for you. 184 00:08:55,518 --> 00:08:56,685 What happened to white wine? 185 00:08:56,770 --> 00:08:59,213 This yanks the shades down a little faster. 186 00:08:59,439 --> 00:09:03,041 Well, look, I tried to call, but you just never answered. 187 00:09:03,126 --> 00:09:04,200 After the whole Philadelphia thing, 188 00:09:04,284 --> 00:09:05,928 you just kinda disappeared. 189 00:09:06,012 --> 00:09:07,268 How much are you charging Jim? 190 00:09:07,353 --> 00:09:08,604 Excuse you? 191 00:09:08,720 --> 00:09:10,994 Jim is one of my oldest friends, 192 00:09:11,721 --> 00:09:15,140 so I'm charging him my friend rate of $100,000 per day. 193 00:09:15,286 --> 00:09:17,706 - How kind. - Look, I know it can be scary 194 00:09:17,791 --> 00:09:19,542 to return to something you failed at. 195 00:09:19,626 --> 00:09:22,526 I didn't fail at baseball. 196 00:09:23,222 --> 00:09:25,407 I failed at saving Morristown. 197 00:09:26,861 --> 00:09:28,237 Who's that? 198 00:09:29,211 --> 00:09:30,462 You here for a drink or trouble? 199 00:09:30,547 --> 00:09:32,431 'Cause I serve both. 200 00:09:32,516 --> 00:09:35,502 Carol, wh... are you living here? 201 00:09:35,678 --> 00:09:37,182 'Fraid so. 202 00:09:37,267 --> 00:09:39,953 Copperheads hit my place a couple weeks back. 203 00:09:40,565 --> 00:09:43,866 They're a roving biker gang who steal 204 00:09:43,950 --> 00:09:46,202 all the copper piping out of the buildings around here. 205 00:09:46,286 --> 00:09:48,580 Ripped all the floors open. 206 00:09:48,761 --> 00:09:51,480 Then they had some kind of yogurt party. 207 00:09:51,658 --> 00:09:53,409 Please tell me you didn't eat that yogurt. 208 00:09:53,493 --> 00:09:56,445 It's fine. It was all over my walls. 209 00:09:56,643 --> 00:09:57,847 Of course I ate the yogurt. 210 00:09:57,931 --> 00:09:59,659 Carol, it's not fine. 211 00:09:59,744 --> 00:10:01,913 Ay-yi-yi. 212 00:10:03,827 --> 00:10:06,744 I do have one idea to help baseball, 213 00:10:07,010 --> 00:10:11,510 a great one, actually, but it's gonna cost him. 214 00:10:11,665 --> 00:10:14,517 - How much? - $134,000. 215 00:10:14,632 --> 00:10:17,217 That's a bizarrely specific number, 216 00:10:17,302 --> 00:10:19,721 but I'm sure Jim can convince them to do that. 217 00:10:19,890 --> 00:10:21,341 I'll get back to you tomorrow. 218 00:10:21,488 --> 00:10:24,455 - Okay. - Limon, blimp. 219 00:10:28,913 --> 00:10:33,033 Mankind is a virus infecting the Earth. 220 00:10:33,266 --> 00:10:37,196 Mankind is a virus infecting the Earth. 221 00:10:39,739 --> 00:10:41,590 What exactly am I looking at right now? 222 00:10:41,674 --> 00:10:42,725 We do a lot of business with cults. 223 00:10:42,809 --> 00:10:45,795 It really helps when tourist season slows down. 224 00:10:45,879 --> 00:10:47,907 Mm. 225 00:10:48,248 --> 00:10:50,165 You work with cults? 226 00:10:50,759 --> 00:10:53,010 Well, I weed out the suicide-y, 227 00:10:53,141 --> 00:10:54,792 marry young girls-y ones. 228 00:10:54,891 --> 00:10:58,144 These guys are great, no drugs, and a very upbeat message. 229 00:10:58,291 --> 00:11:01,743 Mankind is a virus infecting the Earth. 230 00:11:01,851 --> 00:11:03,571 Let's give them some space. 231 00:11:05,146 --> 00:11:08,131 - Mankind is a virus... - Got my money? 232 00:11:08,301 --> 00:11:09,651 Yeah, the whole amount should have been wired 233 00:11:09,735 --> 00:11:10,552 to your account. 234 00:11:10,637 --> 00:11:15,165 Mankind is a virus infecting the Earth. 235 00:11:15,295 --> 00:11:16,555 So it was. 236 00:11:16,640 --> 00:11:18,851 And Jim can't wait for your big idea to save baseball. 237 00:11:18,936 --> 00:11:21,021 Oh, I can just tell it to you. 238 00:11:21,247 --> 00:11:23,999 All Jim has to do is build a time machine 239 00:11:24,083 --> 00:11:26,335 to take everyone back to when America wasn't 240 00:11:26,419 --> 00:11:29,165 a blighted hellscape and baseball was still popular. 241 00:11:29,391 --> 00:11:33,242 It's gonna have to be really big to fit everybody inside. 242 00:11:33,326 --> 00:11:38,532 So you just scammed Jim out of $134,000? 243 00:11:38,617 --> 00:11:40,595 I just recouped my legal expenses 244 00:11:40,680 --> 00:11:42,605 from when those asshole owners sued me, 245 00:11:42,716 --> 00:11:47,493 and I will use that money to finish my visitor's center. 246 00:11:47,602 --> 00:11:49,019 Anyway, what do you care? 247 00:11:49,275 --> 00:11:52,407 You just bilked him for $300,000. 248 00:11:52,492 --> 00:11:54,384 5 actually. 249 00:11:55,982 --> 00:11:58,701 Are we bad people for fleecing our friend? 250 00:11:58,785 --> 00:12:01,454 If he were really our friend, he would have seen this coming. 251 00:12:05,458 --> 00:12:07,676 Is there a time when the eternal flame 252 00:12:07,760 --> 00:12:09,970 - goes out for a little bit? - No, Charles. 253 00:12:10,055 --> 00:12:13,015 That's why it's called the eternal flame. 254 00:12:13,235 --> 00:12:16,298 Well, it's out right now. 255 00:12:16,995 --> 00:12:19,981 Oh, no. It can't just go out. 256 00:12:20,206 --> 00:12:21,290 It can only relocate. 257 00:12:34,984 --> 00:12:37,311 Do you have too many payday loans? 258 00:12:37,396 --> 00:12:38,945 Are you feeling crushed by debt 259 00:12:39,030 --> 00:12:40,702 that you just can't keep up with, 260 00:12:40,787 --> 00:12:43,492 harassed by predatory collectors? 261 00:12:43,577 --> 00:12:45,913 Well, Permacash has the solution. 262 00:12:45,998 --> 00:12:47,702 Permacash will give you the cash advance 263 00:12:47,787 --> 00:12:49,062 your family needs today. 264 00:12:49,147 --> 00:12:50,578 If you're not using your organs, 265 00:12:50,663 --> 00:12:51,820 why not give them to us, 266 00:12:51,905 --> 00:12:54,093 and we'll give you cold, hard cash? 267 00:12:54,178 --> 00:12:56,210 And for a limited time you could take advantage 268 00:12:56,295 --> 00:12:58,234 of our patented pain-free, no-muss, 269 00:12:58,319 --> 00:13:00,523 no-fuss euthanasia process. 270 00:13:00,608 --> 00:13:03,327 You have a choice of coming to a Permacash location near you, 271 00:13:03,411 --> 00:13:05,629 or we can send you a Permacash home donation 272 00:13:05,713 --> 00:13:07,931 and euthanasia kit, and you can file permanent 273 00:13:08,015 --> 00:13:10,300 bankruptcy in the comfort of your own home. 274 00:13:10,384 --> 00:13:12,569 You get those predatory companies off your back, 275 00:13:12,653 --> 00:13:15,170 and your family gets the quick cash they need. 276 00:13:15,306 --> 00:13:17,584 Why suffer through the effects of water toxicity, 277 00:13:17,669 --> 00:13:19,981 radiation sickness, or super cancer? 278 00:13:20,066 --> 00:13:23,295 Let your body go now, before it's of no use to anybody. 279 00:13:23,380 --> 00:13:25,298 Let it go to a good cause. 280 00:13:25,453 --> 00:13:27,504 So if you're in trouble and you can't see a way out, 281 00:13:27,666 --> 00:13:30,944 call Permacash, the last loan you'll ev... 282 00:13:59,300 --> 00:14:01,202 Oh, my bad, sorry. 283 00:14:01,296 --> 00:14:02,383 It seems the years 284 00:14:02,468 --> 00:14:05,101 have not relieved me of my catlike stealth. 285 00:14:06,641 --> 00:14:09,493 - If you came here to beg me... - Beg you? 286 00:14:09,577 --> 00:14:10,861 I'm not even asking you anything. 287 00:14:10,945 --> 00:14:12,680 I mean, work-related, that is. 288 00:14:12,765 --> 00:14:14,965 Jules, I'm just here as your friend. 289 00:14:15,049 --> 00:14:17,701 - Friend? - Yeah. 290 00:14:17,785 --> 00:14:20,508 Whenever I need you, you're always running 291 00:14:20,593 --> 00:14:22,288 in the opposite direction. 292 00:14:23,784 --> 00:14:27,069 No comment? What the hell was that? 293 00:14:27,468 --> 00:14:29,294 A man had just exploded, okay? 294 00:14:29,379 --> 00:14:32,448 For the first time in my life, I was at a loss for words, 295 00:14:32,533 --> 00:14:35,397 and I tried calling you for months after that. 296 00:14:35,482 --> 00:14:37,701 I don't take calls from spineless traitors. 297 00:14:38,039 --> 00:14:39,774 I didn't think you needed me to back you up, Jules. 298 00:14:39,858 --> 00:14:43,413 I mean, after all, you had George Brett, now, didn't you? 299 00:14:43,498 --> 00:14:45,495 Our marriage was already falling apart. 300 00:14:45,580 --> 00:14:48,098 He was very judgmental about the drinking and the drugs. 301 00:14:48,182 --> 00:14:49,546 Plus, he played a lot of golf... 302 00:14:49,631 --> 00:14:52,069 I mean, a lot of golf, like, a lot. 303 00:14:53,221 --> 00:14:54,757 A lot, Jim. 304 00:14:54,842 --> 00:14:56,105 I don't understand what's happening. 305 00:14:56,189 --> 00:14:58,007 Are you using golf as a euphemism? 306 00:14:58,193 --> 00:14:59,929 - No, he played a lot of golf. - Oh. 307 00:15:00,014 --> 00:15:01,937 He bought bathroom humor books about golf 308 00:15:02,022 --> 00:15:05,046 and crocheted head covers for his driver. 309 00:15:05,131 --> 00:15:06,954 He once stopped in the middle of fucking me to talk 310 00:15:07,038 --> 00:15:08,685 about meeting Brandt Snedeker. 311 00:15:08,770 --> 00:15:10,148 Okay, that sounds like a lot of golf. 312 00:15:10,232 --> 00:15:13,319 My disgracing baseball was the final straw for him. 313 00:15:13,428 --> 00:15:15,344 It's just not fair. You shot yourself 314 00:15:15,429 --> 00:15:18,647 on the national stage way more times than I ever did. 315 00:15:18,846 --> 00:15:20,953 Why'd you get five second chances, 316 00:15:21,038 --> 00:15:22,366 and I didn't even get one? 317 00:15:22,450 --> 00:15:24,078 Probably 'cause you're a woman, Jules. 318 00:15:24,163 --> 00:15:26,718 That and people have a hard time letting go of getting 319 00:15:26,827 --> 00:15:29,106 gallaghered with human flesh, but you know what? 320 00:15:29,190 --> 00:15:31,266 You don't need five chances. You just need the one, 321 00:15:31,351 --> 00:15:33,382 and I am here to give it to you, okay? 322 00:15:33,476 --> 00:15:36,914 I'm here to take you out of Morristown for your health 323 00:15:36,998 --> 00:15:38,078 and for your safety. 324 00:15:38,163 --> 00:15:40,205 Please just come with me right now. 325 00:15:40,290 --> 00:15:42,459 I'll take you anywhere you want to go. 326 00:15:43,808 --> 00:15:45,059 I'm not done here. 327 00:15:45,206 --> 00:15:48,392 Morristown can still rebound. 328 00:15:48,476 --> 00:15:50,194 Are you out of your mind? Rebound? 329 00:15:50,278 --> 00:15:53,397 It's over. My God, it was over years ago. 330 00:15:53,481 --> 00:15:55,632 You have to know when to walk away. 331 00:15:55,716 --> 00:15:58,226 There's life after Morristown. 332 00:16:01,689 --> 00:16:03,687 All right, the two singles for you, 333 00:16:03,772 --> 00:16:05,116 the double for me, huh? 334 00:16:05,201 --> 00:16:06,569 A win is a win. 335 00:16:06,654 --> 00:16:07,945 I don't care how ugly it is. 336 00:16:08,030 --> 00:16:09,327 It still counts, huh? 337 00:16:09,412 --> 00:16:13,812 - Dad, a word? - Mm-hmm. 338 00:16:13,897 --> 00:16:15,115 Take a seat. 339 00:16:15,200 --> 00:16:16,862 Well, I'm behind the bar, sweetheart. 340 00:16:16,947 --> 00:16:18,939 There are no stools here. What's happening, Jules? 341 00:16:19,035 --> 00:16:21,510 This is the hardest part about being a daughter, 342 00:16:21,595 --> 00:16:24,822 but it is time for you to quit baseball. 343 00:16:24,907 --> 00:16:25,958 What? 344 00:16:26,147 --> 00:16:28,001 You just don't have it anymore. 345 00:16:28,086 --> 00:16:30,671 What are you talking about? I doubled today. 346 00:16:30,756 --> 00:16:32,735 Yeah, and you barely caught up 347 00:16:32,820 --> 00:16:34,276 to an 80-mile-an-hour fastball, 348 00:16:34,361 --> 00:16:35,872 which you blooped into the right field, 349 00:16:35,956 --> 00:16:37,572 where their guy lost it in the sun. 350 00:16:37,657 --> 00:16:40,065 But a hit is a hit. Am I right? 351 00:16:40,150 --> 00:16:41,947 Yeah! 352 00:16:42,032 --> 00:16:44,431 A hit that ended your 0 for 39. 353 00:16:46,574 --> 00:16:49,493 But on the bright side, you're batting 1,000 354 00:16:49,578 --> 00:16:50,795 at being a dad right now, 355 00:16:50,880 --> 00:16:52,633 and that's where you should focus your attention, 356 00:16:52,717 --> 00:16:54,801 but as far as baseball goes, 357 00:16:54,975 --> 00:16:57,212 it's over, Dad, and you know it is. 358 00:16:57,298 --> 00:17:01,228 You've got to walk away. There's life after baseball. 359 00:17:01,758 --> 00:17:03,611 Ohh... 360 00:17:07,543 --> 00:17:09,460 Well... 361 00:17:09,659 --> 00:17:13,012 it looks like this is a retirement party! 362 00:17:13,183 --> 00:17:15,034 I'm hanging up the cleats. 363 00:17:15,119 --> 00:17:16,537 Drinks are on me! 364 00:17:22,771 --> 00:17:26,024 Carol, are those my pipes? 365 00:17:26,178 --> 00:17:27,976 I realized you were right. 366 00:17:29,081 --> 00:17:30,960 It's not gonna be fine. 367 00:17:31,512 --> 00:17:34,064 I figure if I give the Copperheads an offering, 368 00:17:34,148 --> 00:17:35,929 they might jump me in. 369 00:17:36,350 --> 00:17:40,507 Oh, and I also found your other gun. 370 00:17:44,358 --> 00:17:48,632 Sloppy bitches get stitches. 371 00:17:56,201 --> 00:17:57,898 I'm ready to go now. 372 00:18:01,942 --> 00:18:04,961 Who is the toothless woman who just held us hostage? 373 00:18:11,359 --> 00:18:13,836 - Fantasy. - Fantasy. 374 00:18:14,188 --> 00:18:16,473 - Desire. - Desire. 375 00:18:16,557 --> 00:18:19,009 - Lust. - Lust. 376 00:18:19,093 --> 00:18:21,311 - You're a man. - You're a woman. 377 00:18:21,395 --> 00:18:24,214 With needs, so slip into a realm 378 00:18:24,298 --> 00:18:29,252 where your fantasies, desires, and lusts all become reality. 379 00:18:29,336 --> 00:18:32,289 Mr. Magorium's Masturbatorium. 380 00:18:32,373 --> 00:18:34,891 Once you step into your pleasure pod, 381 00:18:34,975 --> 00:18:37,461 you're in Mr. Magorium's world. 382 00:18:37,586 --> 00:18:40,664 Take the journey to Mr. Magorium's Masturbatorium. 383 00:18:40,748 --> 00:18:43,743 Once you're in his world, you won't want to leave. 384 00:18:43,828 --> 00:18:48,461 We'll hate to see you go, but we love to watch you come. 30094

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