Original subtitles

Subtitles by yestononsense

Mengfei Comes Across

Sister Meng..

This is a fresh newly made pouch!

I worked on it the whole night. I'm giving it to you!

A bribe.

Plain bribery.

Once you start kissing ass, I already know what's going on.

Speak. What did you do wrong?

I know that my wrongdoings this time are a bit ridiculous..

You've clearly told me over and over again but I don't know what thing had me possessed..

I somehow still opened the book that you lent me.. while I was eating..

You know how scary the diplomatic society is..

When I read a scary plot.. If I don't put some stuff in my mouth..

I'll jump from the fright!

Last time I lent you a book,

Oil and salt stains, all that you can stain, you stained.

It's like there's half a scallion cake inside!

I seriously believed you and still lent to you!

Hold on, you keep asking me to borrow books..

So you must know quite a bit of words.

The books I've asked you to borrow are all illustrated.

Just looking at the illustrations I'm able to understand. I have a strong understanding ability.

Sister Meng, don't be mad okay?

Wrongly reincarnated as a pig..

The pouch looks quite good.

Of course. Practice makes perfect.

Doing things that I don't need to use my brain for, I can do easily!

Sister Meng, this pouch you must keep it well.

It represents the things I owe you.. and my love.

Thank you.

I am really an envoy from the Qingquan state.

I want to see your emperor.

Let me in there.

Beggars like you dare to force your way inside.

Do you know where this is?

You don't want your head?

I have an explanation to why I've gotten to this state.

You dare to not respect me.

You're not scared that I'll go back to report to my king

so that he'll send troops to attack?

Hurry and go. Make it quick.

You dare to doubt me?

You're not scared that what I'm saying is true?

Scram!

If you people really don't want to live

and want to come experience our General Bu's sword

then come on over!

Quickly scram.

I lost my money bag.

If I go back now, I don't have any money for travels.. Why don't you guys lend me some?

Your Highness.

Mistress, our stroll.. didn't we stroll a bit too far?

This you don't understand.

In this palace, the places you could see entertaining shows, one is the Imperial Garden.

The other is the palace entrance.

The Imperial Garden I can understand. The concubines are always there causing ruckus.

Why the palace entrance though?

The people inside rarely go outside.

People outside want to come in.

Therefore it nourishes a lot of contradictions, conflicts and collisions.

For the people who love to watch drama playout, this is simply paradise.

Scram!

Beat him!

They're beating me!

Stop!

Do you see this?

Paradise.

Hitting me!

Greetings to Your Highness.

What are you doing?

He's asking us for money.

Is he crazy?

I don't know..

Looking at him I could already guess.

You guys are also struggling in the lines of poverty.

Too inconsiderate. No wonder he's in this state.

Mistress.. the main point isn't that.

Your Highness, you can't give him this money.

I agree, Your Highness. There are too many beggars now. It's hard to prevent.

Exactly!

It's not a problem.

It's not much anyways. Take it as an act of kindness.

Let him go.

Yes!

Mistress, you do kind things without asking for repayment. I really admire that.

Clear your nonsense.

When did I say I don't want repayment?

The more people you help, it's the same as laying out an investment in them.

What if one day they become famous?

They will for sure remember my kindness and repay it by ten fold.

The person that was just there, his five sense organs were all put together.

He isn't an ordinary person.

I should've increased my investment efforts.

The Special Envoy's Visit – Episode 6

WanWan..

In order to win His Majesty's heart..

you're really putting in everything.

I've only recent heard of a story.

There was a concubine that created a frightening dance.

The male lead immediately fell in love with her after she finished dancing!

It was a complete mess.

After that, the chances of getting your name plate flipped went up by 80%.

I was heavily inspired so I created this frightening song. I'm for sure going to become popular.

I'm sorry baby, I must interrupt your glorious imagination.

What she did was called graceful, not frightening.

Graceful?

Is it graceful?

Graceful refers to revealing a woman in one word, beauty. Frightening is in two words, help me.

It's you who wants to see me?

Yes..

This humble servant, Cui Xi, is an envoy from Qingquan state to service diplomatic matters.

You say you're the envoy of Qingquan state.. where's your evidence?

My identification evidence was stolen while I was staying in a hotel.

B-but you can set your worries at ease. I've already sent an express letter to our king.

He is having it sent over quickly.

It's just that in this period of the Spring Festival.. the express shipping might be a bit busy..

I have heard that Your Majesty is a generous person. Presumably you will not.. blame this servant.

You don't have identification evidence but you still dare to see me. You are quite brave.

I..

This all cost me nine cattles and two tigers to get here in my chaotic state.

I've experienced 9981 difficulties before I could finally see you.

I..

I admire the people that are courageous and have a lot of experience.

I will not act on these small matters.

Thank you, Your Majesty.

This small servant still has one request..

Just say it, no worries.

Could Your Majesty send people to go rescue the other envoys that travelled with me?

There were misunderstandings somewhere and now they are locked up in the prison.

I will use my personality.. no, my head to ensure you

My acquaintances are for sure not people who would violate the law and commit crimes!

Okay.

I will have people keep an eye on them for now. After we clarify this matter then I will release them.

Thank you, Your Majesty!

Why don't you tell me what kind of customs you guys have in Qingquan state? Peculiar things?

I.. there's not really.. Oh! I fall under the category of peculiar.

I'm a peculiar feature!

What peculiar features?

I..

I'm the dancing king there!

Dancing king!

Why don't.. I show you?

It's a must! Go on!

Wan Yan, I heard.. that His Majesty summoned the envoy from Qingquan state?

Do you know about this?

There isn't a single thing that I don't know.

Qingquan state? What and what?

There's a drought all year long in Qingquan state.

The name of the state is based on the good hope of the people.

In their state, the women are the decision makers.

The embroiderers in the household are all men.

The women are the leaders of the household. Impressive people.

Then why are they here?

Of course to build a friendship!

Do you guys think that when they came.. they brought a lot of their delicacies?

Would it be yummy?

Delicacies there are none.

But he did offer to His Majesty an auspicious stone.

There are patterns on the stone that are similar to dragons.

That's rare!

Envoy Cui.

You can enter and exit the palace at your own will if you have that.

After your identification evidence is delivered, we'll move you to four-way embassy quarters for you to live in.

When the time comes, His Majesty will treat you to a big feast.

Okay okay. Thank you, Eunuch.

No problem.

This place is pretty neat too.

Oh right.. the money for the room, did you guys cover it?

Don't worry, just rest at ease.

Envoy Cui,

About when will your identification evidence arrive?

Your passport.

The weather hasn't been good these past couples day so it may take awhile.

It will be here soon!

Our king is paying special attention to this case.

I heard that once I left, our king left too.

He insisted on coming personally to build a friendship with your emperor, face to face.

Your king is going to come to?

Speak.

Then.. then there's nothing wrong.

Oh wait! Right right, there's something!

There's something that I haven't told you yet.

No worries. I'm a really laid back person, anything will do for me.

I don't have any preferences but our king.. he may have some difficulties adjusting.

If our king is coming, I ask of you to please take good care of him.

Teacher, that envoy doesn't seem right.

He's dressed pretty nicely but

he still doesn't seem like a good person.

How'd you see that?

He has too many requests, like a stepmother.

I don't believe that the king of Qingquan state is that noble and precious.

Could it be that he wears gold on his face?

My airplane!

Eunuch Wu!

Greetings to Your Highnesses!

This game is really fun..

I'm sorry, Eunuch Wu!

It's okay, it's okay!

Your Highnesses are playing well, greetings to Your Highnesses.

What's going on Fuxi?

You have an expression like you just ate poop.

It's even more disgusting.

That Envoy Cui is not likeable.

This servant doesn't think he's here to build a friendship.

Seems like he's here to seek death.

And the king of Qingquan state is almost here!

He's saying for us to watch our posture. He could write even eight different books for it.

So hard to serve.

Fuxi, are you seeking death?

This is in the deep palace. Don't talk about death!

Hit your mouth, hit your mouth. Right Eunuch Wu?

Right, right.

Oh Eunuch Wu, I'm so sorry. It's okay, it's okay. This..This is my fortune.

Fortune.

Then we will excuse ourselves.

Your Highnesses play happily, play happily.

Go on.

Let's go!

Why didn't I look at my horoscope today?

If it were up to me to say.. His Majesty is too kind-hearted.

No defense preparations at all.

This is called kind-hearted?

He has many schemes to mess with people.

Look at my hands!

I washed chess pieces for the entire night. The skin is ready to fall off!

It's the misfortune that was invited by your emptiness and loneliness.

Greetings to Your Majesty.

Rise, my beloved consorts.

Consort Meng, do you know who's stuff you're kicking right now?

It's just a rock..

How would I know who's it is?

Who's it is you don't know. Even if it was yours, you wouldn't know either.

Pick it up and see.

There's a drawing of an earthworm.

Earthworm?

Could it be the dragon..?

Could this be the auspicious rock that Envoy Cui delivered?

Isn't this just some poor stepping stone?!

Beloved Consorts, speak cautiously.

This is the precious treasure that Envoy Cui gave to me.

You kicked it until it lost it's auspicious power.

What should we do then?

Bu Meng! Look at what you did!

You cause trouble the second you step out of Spring Courtyard! How could you ever be sorry enough for the kindness and cooperation His Majesty has for you?

Do you know you're wrong?

Me?

Why aren't you apologizing!

My foot is cheap. It's my fault, my fault that I'm useless.

It's nothing. You being useless isn't something new.

I'm used to it.

I see you have fate with this stone. I will grant it to you.

To put beneath your bed.

Why put it beneath my bed?

To drive away evil?

It's not that it can't drive off evil..

But I think that this stone is a bit strange.

I don't know if it's been soaked in pickles..

Put it beneath your bed to smell it for me and see if I'm right.

This was personally granted by His Majesty. You should put it somewhere!

Last lifetime I don't know if I dug up graves or kicked a widow!

Why is he doing this to me!

It's loneliness that brought upon this!

Where are you going?

You guys are back?

Quickly look for me! How is this outfit?

This big of a peony, is it charming enough? Is it graceful enough?

Really enough..

I've decided not to sing!

In this environment it isn't good. When you cause trouble, everyone's looking at you.

The danger rate is too high.

I decided to take a piece of her graceful dance.

She has her gracefulness, I have mine.

How about it?

You're so proud of copying.

I'll cast you aside.

What's in your hand?

A precious treasure granted by His Majesty.

Possibly because it was soaked in pickles, the smell is a bit unique.

Do you want it?

Yes yes yes!

My god..

Not only was this personally granted by His Majesty but it also emits the faint scent of food.

This really is a priceless treasure!

You scared me to death.

You're finally here.

I got your message. It wrote much money, stupid people, quickly come so I came!

The real envoys, you made them scram right?

They were let go of.

Once the prison doors opened, those who still have their head ran, ran home.

Right now, the chance is perfect for us.

The things I told you bring, did you bring them?

I brought them! Come come, I'll show you.

I got them from the Panjia Market. I brought a lot!

Right here.

I'm starved. You look, I'll eat first.

Fortunately

I found a stone to give him.

This is great.

Tomorrow I'll give these items to his concubines.

Your Majesty.

What did you find?

The identification evidence is real. The envoys.. are fake.

It's really as I thought! To give poor gifts like that, they're obviously not important envoys.

They really think I'm some idiot.

I also discovered Consort Meng and that fake envoy talked in front of the palace.

Consort Meng gave him a lot of money.

This really happened?

There is a good reason for it. At first the fake envoy begged for money at the palace gates to return home.

Consort Meng pitied him and helped him.

That fake envoy never returned home and in turn, entered the palace.

She is really too soft-hearted.

Loves being nosy.

Perfect, I'll use this chance to teach her.

To help her.

Your Majesty.. as for the two counterfeit goods..?

Nothing. You to Qingquan state, invite the real king over as a guest.

But the journey is quite a distance. By the time they get here..

I'm afraid those two counterfeit goods would've already escaped.

I have my ways.

Yes.

Your Majesty,

These are small gifts, it is not much.

Please kindly accept.

This is a little gesture from my king.

Wu Wei Yong.

Here.

Split them between the concubines. Do as you see fit.

Yes.

The identification evidence, I've already looked over.

It is indeed the great seal of Qingquan state.

Qingquan King, the distance was long. It must've been hard for you.

Not difficult at all. In order to be in service of Your Majesty,

Even if-

Then you guys will stay in the four-way embassy quarters.

I will prepare a grand feast.

I must host you well.

Thank you, Your Majesty.

This way my king.

Wu Wei Yong.

Here. Bring Consort Meng to Longevity Palace.

Understood.

Esteemed emperor, the noble concubines and consorts

as well as our international friends,

Good evening everyone!

Good!

I am the manly host tonight, Eunuch Wu.

I am.. the more manly host tonight, Cai Tai Xian.

Look.

The bright and beautiful moonlight.

That is a magnificent characteristic of the palace.

Listen.

The beating of the heart is the moving melody of the night.

In order to welcome Qingquan state's king and his envoy,

As instructed by the top,

Tonight we will be hosting a special the breaking of a new path song and dance show.

Song and dance. As the name suggests, it can be singing or dancing.

It can also be both singing and dancing.

Let's invite our first performer onto the stage.

The performance is from the Spring Courtyard.

The Spring Courtyard, the elegant Spring Courtyard. Please everyone, enjoy.

Look, look. Her earrings are swaying.

Good!

Why are you so happy that you're smiling from ear to ear? It's like there's an umbrella in your mouth.

Pay more attention. Next, we'll probably witness a miracle.

My investment is about to pay off soon.

Look in front.

Good! Good good! Good!

Especially good!

Especially good!

King, is there an issue?

She.. She danced too well!

Your Majesty,

I want to ask, is the girl who danced named Qu Wanwan?

Yes.

God really does pay off the ones with a good heart. I've finally found her. Your Majesty, you don't even know..

Your Majesty,

Look closely.

Your Majesty, sewn on the pouch there is her portrait and her name.

If it wasn't for this girl

that gave Small Cui some money when he desperately needed it..

Small Cui would've starved to death on the corner of a street and died in a foreign land.

How would there even be a feast tonight?

It would be completely empty talk.

Not only does he have a story but he also has evidence with the truth..

You can tell they came prepared.

Even if you want to dig at a wall.. this isn't the way to dig at it..

Girls like this are most difficult to come by.

Her heart is so kind and loving. WanWan.

So noble..

I say did you forget to take your medicine?

Why did you sew your own name onto the pouch?

I was giving it to you!

It was in order for you to be able to distinguish it and preserve it.

How did I know that it would appear in some random man's hands?

Her delicate and lovely mouth makes her the sweetheart in my dreams..

Your Majesty, I really like her. Would you please grant me my wish?

I-

Sit sit sit!

What the hell is going on?

A tragedy that has been brought to light from many causes.

Okay.. it was me who was stupid..

It's good that you know you're stupid.

But a happy kind of stupid.

Did you read the books all wrong?

You're already the emperor's woman.

Those who come to fight for you is hitting His Majesty's face.

Under these circumstances,

His Majesty's proud self control will collapse in seconds.

Oh crap.

Seriously?

His Majesty won't be angry at me right?

Your Majesty.. what do you think of my king's suggestion?

Using an imperial concubine for a marriage to keep peace is one of our customs..

That way it strengthens our two parties connections.

Your customs are quite unique..

Your Majesty, you see.. your harem is full of beauties..

You couldn't possibly care for all these beauties.

Beauties are the creation of god.

It cannot go to waste! If it does, it wouldn't be right. Am I right, Your Majesty?

Consort Meng.

Come over here.

Your Majesty..

I cannot give you Imperial Concubine Qu.

Because she can eat too much.

Qingquan state wasn't prosperous to begin with. If she eats until it collapses then wouldn't you blame me?

But Consort Meng.

If you don't care too much, you can take her.

Y-Your Majesty..

Now's not the time to joke around..

The banquet is concluded.

I'm tired.

Talk another day.

Thank you, Your Majesty! Thank you!

Slow down! Slow down! Halt! Where are you guys going?

But.. didn't he grant her to us? Everyone dismissed!

Your Majesty!

I'm begging you, please take back your decree! I know I'm wrong!

Where were you wrong?

I shouldn't have given him money and the pouch without knowing anything.

Bringing this mess..

Inviting a wolf into the palace..

Made you lose face..

You gift someone something and cause all this trouble. You are quite extravagant.

Why haven't you given me a pouch?

What? You think I wouldn't accept something you give me?

Will gift! Will gift! Your Majesty, don't get angry.

However much you want, I'll give you however much!

The thing about the pouch.. I've already explained..

Then the thing about my marriage alliance.. can it not happen anymore?

You guess.

Your Majesty! You can't! Keep me here, I'm useful!

I won't say no even if you tell me to be a cow or a horse. Even if you tell me to go up a mountain or into the sea.

Okay.

Since you have so much sincerity, I will make some job arrangements for you.

If you do it well, the marriage alliance goes away.

But if you don't do well.. then..

Will not happen! What does Your Majesty need? Go on and say it.

The envoys will leave in 3 days.

You must think of ways to delay their travels

at all costs.

At all costs?

Exactly.

You scared me to death!

Why is everyone from Qingquan state so scary? Is the water shortage affecting your brains?

You are..?

You don't remember me?

That day in front of the palace, it was me who lent you money.

By coincidence that pouch was given to me by Imperial Concubine Qu.

I never thought that inside the pouch would have her name and image.

So that's why there was a misunderstanding.

Oh.. It's you?

I'm sorry I have prosopagnosia so I can't tell people's faces apart.

No wonder..

This time I didn't come here for repayment.

It's like this.

Since it's something silly, why don't you get rid of the marriage alliance?

According to our customs, stealing someone's wife is very disrespectful.

No no! In our country, it's not disrespectful at all.

It's something normal.

You must respect our customs.

Don't run!

You run quite fast.

It's dead!

Run now! Run!

Oh my god!

This is the beloved pet of our emperor!

Brother Zhuang!

Wake up Brother Zhuang! You can't die!

You're too cruel!

You dare to kill our beloved Brother Zhuang so cruelly!

Such brutal tyranny.. I can't believe I let you die right before my eyes..

I am heartbroken..

Painful to the core..

Brother Zhuang couldn't be the legendary.. Xiao Qiang right?

Sister, you need not to be in so much pain.

Perhaps he wasn't meant to be born..

Even if he gets to the other side, he'll still be happy!

How do you know he'll be happy over there! Why don't I get someone to bring you over there!

No no no! I.. you..

He is a mixed insect. Even if I went, I wouldn't be able to get in..

We won't cross eachother.. This..

Since the accident already happened.. what could we do.

Unless..

How is it? Quickly tell us!

They killed His Majesty's beloved Brother Zhuang. They can't leave 3 days later.

I've already convinced them to stay for Brother Zhuang's mourning.

If 7 days aren't enough, I'll have them mourn for 49 days straight to help Brother Zhuang reincarnate.

If it's still not enough then I'll have to convince them to help mourn for a hundred days.

Who is Brother Zhuang?

His Majesty has another pet? Why didn't I know?

A cockroach that's willing to give up life to assist me in my act, it must've been hard for him.

His Majesty likes to raise these strange animals anyway.

The pet is like the master.

Why do I hear someone talking crap behind my back?

Your Majesty!

Greetings to Your Majesty.

Beloved concubines, rise.

Your Majesty, the task you've given me I already completed.

They can't leave for now.

I'm here to check on progress but who knew you'd be so quick.

You live up to being Consort Meng.

A stomach full of lousy ideas.

All decent ideas, no lousy.

Oh right.

I think that you should learn that dance from Imperial Concubine Qu called..

Fearful Dance!

Right! Fearful Dance. An amazing dance.

Very energetic! When you have time, teach her.

Your Majesty, you just want to see me embarrass myself and entertain you right?

You usually don't embarrass yourself and you still manage to entertain me.

Great, Your Majesty! I could teach all the concubines! It'll be so lively all of us dancing together!

But for everyone to dance together.. I don't think there's a space big enough..

How could there not be a space big enough?

I'll have Wu Wei Yong prepare a place.

One, it could show the positive outlook of the concubines in the harem.

Two, it could help strengthen the health of a body.

It would help lessen the trouble of the Imperial Physicians.

It's really the best of both worlds.

Consort Meng, right?

Your Majesty is wise!

Don't leave! Let's play together!

So many people came! Come on! Let's all play together!

This is not fun to play. Put your knives down.

How dare you criminals! Impersonating a king! Where is your heart?

But.. We..

Don't speak.

You guys have the right to remain silent. I'm going to pretend I didn't hear anything.

Too exciting! Did you prepare this?

No.

We've been exposed! I told you to work with me and now we've been exposed.

According to law, you'd be sent back to your country.

However today your Qingquan state queen arrived

and apologized sincerely to our emperor.

As for what punishment you'll receive.. it'll all rest with your Queen.

No nonsense! Take them away!

But..

Quickly!

Never make a secret agreement!

I told you not to speak!

I only followed after your steps!

No! Go go!

You sucked at acting and you blame me! Don't speak!

Is saying all that useful? We've already been captured!

What do you think? Don't I make a great example?

Full of flaws.. Full of flaws!

Why didn't I think of it? A powerful woman nation, how could it be ruled by a man?

Don't reveal it after it's already been revealed!

The one who made the biggest sacrifice was me!

I already thought that it was difficult for women to fight in wars.

The women there could actually hold the highest position.

Too amazing.

But..

No one pities me?

You can move now.

Your Majesty!

You're too much! You knew they were fakes, why didn't you tell me?

In order to not get sent off for a marriage alliance, do you know how much I worried?! My hair is falling off! My hairline has even moved back!

I didn't say?

No, you didn't!

In order to delay them I've even sewn all the mourning clothes for Brother Zhuang.

I even have blisters on my hands, look!

I must've forgotten.

Due to the fact that Qingquan state is quite far

and I needed to invite their Queen which would take some time.

I was worried they'd find out.

That's why I sent you to delay them

But I didn't think that you wouldn't think of the fact that they're fakes.

Who would be able to?!

You did this on purpose!

After this, you've surely learned your lesson?

Got it.

You can't believe anything a man says. Especially not Your Majesty's.

Oh right.

Since I delayed them so well until their Queen got here.. Shouldn't I at least get a little reward?

Giving you a pouch.. Can we forget about that?

No.

Make it well, I'll wait. Get going.