All language subtitles for My.Brother.My.Brother.And.Me.S01E06_English

af Afrikaans
sq Albanian
am Amharic
ar Arabic
hy Armenian
az Azerbaijani
eu Basque
be Belarusian
bn Bengali
bs Bosnian
bg Bulgarian
ca Catalan
ceb Cebuano
ny Chichewa
zh-CN Chinese (Simplified)
zh-TW Chinese (Traditional)
co Corsican
hr Croatian
cs Czech
da Danish
nl Dutch Download
en English
eo Esperanto
et Estonian
tl Filipino
fi Finnish
fr French
fy Frisian
gl Galician
ka Georgian
de German
el Greek
gu Gujarati
ht Haitian Creole
ha Hausa
haw Hawaiian
iw Hebrew
hi Hindi
hmn Hmong
hu Hungarian
is Icelandic
ig Igbo
id Indonesian
ga Irish
it Italian
ja Japanese
jw Javanese
kn Kannada
kk Kazakh
km Khmer
ko Korean
ku Kurdish (Kurmanji)
ky Kyrgyz
lo Lao
la Latin
lv Latvian
lt Lithuanian
lb Luxembourgish
mk Macedonian
mg Malagasy
ms Malay
ml Malayalam
mt Maltese
mi Maori
mr Marathi
mn Mongolian
my Myanmar (Burmese)
ne Nepali
no Norwegian
ps Pashto
fa Persian
pl Polish
pt Portuguese
pa Punjabi
ro Romanian
ru Russian
sm Samoan
gd Scots Gaelic
sr Serbian
st Sesotho
sn Shona
sd Sindhi
si Sinhala
sk Slovak
sl Slovenian
so Somali
es Spanish
su Sundanese
sw Swahili
sv Swedish
tg Tajik
ta Tamil
te Telugu
th Thai
tr Turkish
uk Ukrainian
ur Urdu
uz Uzbek
vi Vietnamese
cy Welsh
xh Xhosa
yi Yiddish
yo Yoruba
zu Zulu
or Odia (Oriya)
rw Kinyarwanda
tk Turkmen
tt Tatar
ug Uyghur
Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:00:07,508 --> 00:00:09,238 -You're the one. 2 00:00:09,277 --> 00:00:10,637 -Hello, everybody, 3 00:00:10,678 --> 00:00:12,178 and welcome to "My Brother, My Brother and Me", 4 00:00:12,213 --> 00:00:13,383 an advice show for the modern era. 5 00:00:13,414 --> 00:00:15,084 I'm your oldest brother, Justin McElroy. 6 00:00:15,116 --> 00:00:16,376 -I'm your middlest brother, Travis McElroy. 7 00:00:16,417 --> 00:00:19,217 -And I'm your sweet baby brother, Griffin McElroy. 8 00:00:19,253 --> 00:00:21,393 -On this, the final episode of season one 9 00:00:21,422 --> 00:00:23,422 of "My Brother, My Brother and Me," 10 00:00:23,457 --> 00:00:26,427 a cliffhanger leaves us all in suspense. 11 00:00:26,460 --> 00:00:29,360 -My God, it's Griffin. He's been... 12 00:00:29,397 --> 00:00:33,097 It's, uh, ugh. 13 00:00:33,134 --> 00:00:36,544 -Oh, no! Aw, dang! 14 00:00:36,570 --> 00:00:37,670 Aw, no! 15 00:00:37,705 --> 00:00:40,505 Am I gonna die? Aw, I touched it. 16 00:00:40,541 --> 00:00:43,141 And it hurts even more to touch it. 17 00:00:43,177 --> 00:00:45,447 Am I gonna die? 18 00:00:45,479 --> 00:00:47,149 -Stay tuned. 19 00:00:47,181 --> 00:00:49,151 -Justin, why don't you read that cue? 20 00:00:49,183 --> 00:00:50,623 -You got it, G Flip. 21 00:00:50,651 --> 00:00:53,651 This one comes to us from Jackie from Brooklyn, who asks, 22 00:00:53,687 --> 00:00:56,087 "I've been trying to quit smoking for the past year 23 00:00:56,124 --> 00:00:59,494 and recently started vaping. [ Laughs ] 24 00:00:59,527 --> 00:01:01,427 I'm a third grade teacher and..." 25 00:01:01,462 --> 00:01:04,632 [ Whooshing, screaming, crying ] 26 00:01:23,651 --> 00:01:25,351 -[ Coughs ] 27 00:01:25,386 --> 00:01:28,386 [ Whooshing, screaming, crying continues ] 28 00:01:36,264 --> 00:01:39,404 -It's Candle Nights. 29 00:01:39,433 --> 00:01:42,143 -It's Candle Nights. 30 00:01:42,170 --> 00:01:44,570 -It's Candle Nights. 31 00:01:44,605 --> 00:01:46,565 -[ Bell jingles ] -[ Beep ] 32 00:01:46,607 --> 00:01:49,377 [ Classical music plays ] 33 00:01:49,410 --> 00:01:52,750 -Oh, no, no, no, no. Don't go in the house. 34 00:01:52,780 --> 00:01:54,580 Oh, hello. 35 00:01:54,615 --> 00:01:56,675 'Twas the night before Candle Nights 36 00:01:56,717 --> 00:01:59,417 when, all through the town, not a creature quite knew 37 00:01:59,453 --> 00:02:01,393 what the heck could go down. 38 00:02:01,422 --> 00:02:03,592 For a great celebration, a tradition of glee, 39 00:02:03,624 --> 00:02:07,204 it was bursting right out of the McElroy three, 40 00:02:07,228 --> 00:02:08,498 a religious melange, 41 00:02:08,529 --> 00:02:10,399 a chopped salad of rites, 42 00:02:10,431 --> 00:02:13,301 a new celebration they call Candle Nights. 43 00:02:13,334 --> 00:02:16,304 So we're beaming this story direct to your screens 44 00:02:16,337 --> 00:02:19,707 a TV nightmare, turned Candle Nights dream. 45 00:02:19,740 --> 00:02:21,380 So sit back, settle in, 46 00:02:21,409 --> 00:02:24,249 for we welcome all comers to our holiday tale. 47 00:02:24,278 --> 00:02:26,608 And we promise no bummers. 48 00:02:26,647 --> 00:02:28,547 [ Bells jingle ] 49 00:02:32,220 --> 00:02:33,620 -[ Bells jingle ] -[ Bells jingle ] Yeah. 50 00:02:33,654 --> 00:02:35,624 -Oh, yeah, I heard the sleigh bells. 51 00:02:35,656 --> 00:02:37,786 -Yeah. We can't curse. It's Candle Nights. 52 00:02:37,825 --> 00:02:39,625 Well, beans, we had such a good vape episode 53 00:02:39,660 --> 00:02:40,630 ready for everybody. -It's so good. 54 00:02:40,661 --> 00:02:42,401 -I'm so disappointed. 55 00:02:42,430 --> 00:02:44,370 -This is even one of my good jokes I was gonna do, 56 00:02:44,398 --> 00:02:45,498 like, one of my new tag lines. 57 00:02:45,533 --> 00:02:47,473 Gotta have my vape. 58 00:02:47,501 --> 00:02:48,671 -[ Chuckles ] It's so good. -Could I get a zoom, 59 00:02:48,702 --> 00:02:50,672 a closer zoom on me when I do that? 60 00:02:50,704 --> 00:02:52,774 Gotta have my vape. 61 00:02:52,806 --> 00:02:55,336 -We're dangerous. -I was gonna dress like 62 00:02:55,376 --> 00:02:57,476 a gorilla that loved vape named Vape Ape. 63 00:02:57,511 --> 00:02:59,511 -That's extremely good. -For kids. 64 00:02:59,547 --> 00:03:01,747 -But we can't anymore. Now, it's about Candle Nights. 65 00:03:01,782 --> 00:03:04,322 -Justin, our podcast listeners know what Candle Nights is. 66 00:03:04,352 --> 00:03:07,492 What about the TV show people who are Johnny-come-latelies 67 00:03:07,521 --> 00:03:09,561 to the MBMBAM train. What's Candle Nights? 68 00:03:09,590 --> 00:03:11,830 -Candy Nights is primarily a legal trademark 69 00:03:11,859 --> 00:03:14,459 of "My Brother, My Brother and Me," Big Giant Head, LLC. 70 00:03:14,495 --> 00:03:15,595 That's our company. 71 00:03:15,629 --> 00:03:17,529 But also, it's a holiday. 72 00:03:17,565 --> 00:03:19,565 It's one that everybody can share in. 73 00:03:19,600 --> 00:03:21,400 And it absorbed all other holidays, 74 00:03:21,435 --> 00:03:23,265 Christmas, Hanukkah, Oktoberfest. 75 00:03:23,304 --> 00:03:24,514 They're all gone. 76 00:03:24,538 --> 00:03:26,538 -Ate 'em up good. -It ate 'em up all good. 77 00:03:26,574 --> 00:03:30,514 And it can come whenever, which is normally good, 78 00:03:30,544 --> 00:03:34,284 except in this case, when it [bell jangles] up our TV show. 79 00:03:34,315 --> 00:03:35,375 -Sleigh bell. 80 00:03:35,416 --> 00:03:36,716 -Sleigh bells, sorry about that. 81 00:03:36,750 --> 00:03:38,820 -Now, Justin, that's what Candle Nights is. 82 00:03:38,852 --> 00:03:42,022 But it's not necessarily what Candle Nights is about. 83 00:03:42,055 --> 00:03:45,325 Let's tell 'em the true story of Candle Nights. 84 00:03:45,359 --> 00:03:46,859 And this is where we'll put the animation at. 85 00:03:46,894 --> 00:03:48,634 -And this is where we'll come up with what the history 86 00:03:48,662 --> 00:03:50,032 of Candle Nights is. -Yeah. 87 00:03:50,063 --> 00:03:51,873 -Okay. -Once upon a time, 88 00:03:51,899 --> 00:03:54,739 there were three brothers named Justice, 89 00:03:54,768 --> 00:03:56,338 the handsomest brother, 90 00:03:56,370 --> 00:03:59,710 and also his sidekicks, Tyler and Gordon. 91 00:03:59,740 --> 00:04:01,340 Now, some folks believes 92 00:04:01,375 --> 00:04:03,635 that Tyler was actually the handsomest. 93 00:04:03,677 --> 00:04:06,477 They said he had the body of both a Greek god 94 00:04:06,514 --> 00:04:07,724 and a Roman god. 95 00:04:07,748 --> 00:04:09,618 -Gordon had angel wings and could fly 96 00:04:09,650 --> 00:04:12,450 and also a 10-inch ding dong. 97 00:04:12,486 --> 00:04:14,786 -Justice liked in a mountainous landscape 98 00:04:14,822 --> 00:04:17,292 near his father, Klump. 99 00:04:17,325 --> 00:04:21,755 One day, after, uh, polishing his 11-inch big dong.. 100 00:04:21,795 --> 00:04:23,625 [ Laughter ] 101 00:04:23,664 --> 00:04:26,734 ...Justice, uh, realized that it had been quite a while 102 00:04:26,767 --> 00:04:30,697 since he had used his three wings to fly very, very fast 103 00:04:30,738 --> 00:04:33,368 to go see his brothers, Tyler and Gordon. 104 00:04:33,407 --> 00:04:35,637 -Gordon was usually busy gettin' up on the hoop. 105 00:04:35,676 --> 00:04:37,806 "Look at him go now. Look at him jump up high 106 00:04:37,845 --> 00:04:39,905 and dunk in two hoops at once with one ball." 107 00:04:39,947 --> 00:04:43,877 -Justice decided that the three brothers should, uh, have a... 108 00:04:43,917 --> 00:04:47,617 What's, like, a fancy way of sayin' podcast? 109 00:04:47,655 --> 00:04:49,715 -Uh, they had a magical conversation. 110 00:04:49,757 --> 00:04:52,427 -A magical communion every week. 111 00:04:52,460 --> 00:04:55,830 And one of those weeks, they found visited upon themselves 112 00:04:55,863 --> 00:04:58,473 by Candle Nights, a legal trademark 113 00:04:58,499 --> 00:04:59,869 of "My Brother, My Brother and Me." 114 00:04:59,900 --> 00:05:02,700 To celebrate the spirit of inclusiveness, 115 00:05:02,736 --> 00:05:04,666 the brothers, every year, 116 00:05:04,705 --> 00:05:08,105 travel back to their mountainous homestead to visit with Klump 117 00:05:08,141 --> 00:05:10,941 but also commune with all their listeners 118 00:05:10,978 --> 00:05:13,408 in an annual Candle Nights celebration. 119 00:05:13,447 --> 00:05:14,677 -Hang on. -Oh, no! 120 00:05:14,715 --> 00:05:15,675 It has just occurred to me, 121 00:05:15,716 --> 00:05:16,876 we also have to put together 122 00:05:16,917 --> 00:05:20,347 a Candle Nights live show in three days. 123 00:05:20,388 --> 00:05:21,888 -How are we gonna do that? -What? 124 00:05:21,922 --> 00:05:23,562 -Why are we looking at our wrists? 125 00:05:23,591 --> 00:05:24,691 -Okay. Okay. 126 00:05:24,725 --> 00:05:26,425 -Enough no-in', time for yes-in'. 127 00:05:26,460 --> 00:05:27,600 We're gonna put this live show on. 128 00:05:27,628 --> 00:05:28,758 -Yes. 129 00:05:28,796 --> 00:05:29,826 -We're gonna blow everybody's minds. 130 00:05:29,863 --> 00:05:31,473 -Yes. -We're gonna throw 131 00:05:31,499 --> 00:05:32,529 the best Candle Nights anybody's ever seen. 132 00:05:32,566 --> 00:05:33,966 But first, 133 00:05:34,001 --> 00:05:35,641 nobody out there probably knows that it's Candle Nights. 134 00:05:35,669 --> 00:05:36,839 I think we start by spreadin' the good news. 135 00:05:36,870 --> 00:05:37,870 -Okay. -Let's get it. Let's go. 136 00:05:37,905 --> 00:05:39,705 -Let's get out there. 137 00:05:39,740 --> 00:05:42,740 ** 138 00:05:46,480 --> 00:05:47,980 -All right. Real quick, real quick, real quick, 139 00:05:48,015 --> 00:05:49,545 real quick, though. 140 00:05:49,583 --> 00:05:50,823 And then, after the first Candle Nights, 141 00:05:50,851 --> 00:05:52,491 an angel visited Gordon 142 00:05:52,520 --> 00:05:55,460 and made his ding dong 13 inches long. 143 00:05:55,489 --> 00:05:58,629 And he cast a curse upon Tyler and Justice 144 00:05:58,659 --> 00:06:00,989 that their ding dongs would never grow again. 145 00:06:01,028 --> 00:06:03,428 In fact, they shriveled up. And then Gordon... 146 00:06:03,464 --> 00:06:04,604 -Griffin, come on! Let's go! 147 00:06:04,632 --> 00:06:07,572 -Thanks. -So they get into gear. 148 00:06:07,601 --> 00:06:08,841 And they must do it fast, 149 00:06:08,869 --> 00:06:12,169 for TV moves quick, compared to podcast. 150 00:06:12,205 --> 00:06:13,605 -You go first. -No, you go first. 151 00:06:13,641 --> 00:06:14,781 -Okay, let me go first. 152 00:06:14,808 --> 00:06:16,908 Uh, we made you this card from our hearts. 153 00:06:16,944 --> 00:06:18,184 We made that with our own hands. 154 00:06:18,211 --> 00:06:19,551 If you would read it out loud... 155 00:06:19,580 --> 00:06:22,450 -"Happy Candle Nights, Mr. Mayor. 156 00:06:22,483 --> 00:06:24,493 We love you very much. 157 00:06:24,518 --> 00:06:27,688 The McElroy boys are not the legal mayors of Hunting-- 158 00:06:27,721 --> 00:06:29,491 Uh, yeah, the fact that 159 00:06:29,523 --> 00:06:32,733 I'm saying this out loud... 160 00:06:32,760 --> 00:06:33,890 makes it legal." 161 00:06:33,927 --> 00:06:35,727 [ Laughter ] -Perfect! Excellent! 162 00:06:35,763 --> 00:06:38,503 -I have a gift, too. I think you'll really like it. 163 00:06:38,532 --> 00:06:41,572 Um, uh, I wrapped it myself. -Yeah. 164 00:06:41,602 --> 00:06:43,902 Do you have enough, uh, Scotch tape? 165 00:06:43,937 --> 00:06:47,607 -That's actually holiday tape. And it's very expensive. 166 00:06:47,641 --> 00:06:49,781 -It's a Brita water filter refill. 167 00:06:49,810 --> 00:06:51,650 -A refill? 168 00:06:51,679 --> 00:06:52,979 -Every time you drink clean water, you can think of us. 169 00:06:53,013 --> 00:06:54,583 -We'll know. -I'll -- I'll -- I'll -- 170 00:06:54,615 --> 00:06:55,945 I'll think of you guys. So all right. 171 00:06:55,983 --> 00:06:58,823 I know I'm bein', uh, loosened up for somethin'. 172 00:06:58,852 --> 00:07:01,722 What I need to know -- What else is it you're wanting? 173 00:07:01,755 --> 00:07:03,885 Because I've come to understand you guys. 174 00:07:03,924 --> 00:07:05,664 Back about Candle Night. -Candle Nights. 175 00:07:05,693 --> 00:07:07,503 -Candle Nights. -Candle Nights. 176 00:07:07,528 --> 00:07:09,628 -One thing we're bumpin' up against is getting the word out. 177 00:07:09,663 --> 00:07:11,573 Just gonna pitch this to you. 178 00:07:11,599 --> 00:07:14,969 Wondering if we can just borrow the emergency alert system 179 00:07:15,002 --> 00:07:17,612 or that was a... Sorry. 180 00:07:17,638 --> 00:07:19,508 I... -That's no. 181 00:07:19,540 --> 00:07:22,010 -If a tornado happens today, you put out the alert, 182 00:07:22,042 --> 00:07:23,642 "Tornadoes -- tornadoes are comin'. 183 00:07:23,677 --> 00:07:25,007 Get down to the bunkers." 184 00:07:25,045 --> 00:07:26,745 But then I come in right at the end, uh, 'cause I'm like, 185 00:07:26,780 --> 00:07:28,520 "Oh, and by the way, it's Candle Nights tonight. 186 00:07:28,549 --> 00:07:29,819 We're gonna put on a great show down at City Hall. 187 00:07:29,850 --> 00:07:32,750 Get down there, 8 p.m. Be there." 188 00:07:32,786 --> 00:07:33,946 -Why don't we just do it this way? 189 00:07:33,987 --> 00:07:35,757 -Mm-hmm. 190 00:07:35,789 --> 00:07:37,929 -Why don't we leave it up to you all to get the word out? 191 00:07:37,958 --> 00:07:39,858 -Mm-hmm. Okay. -Great. 192 00:07:39,893 --> 00:07:41,563 -You don't need government involved in this. 193 00:07:41,595 --> 00:07:43,095 You don't need any of our help. 194 00:07:43,130 --> 00:07:46,030 You're selling yourselves way, way, way too short 195 00:07:46,066 --> 00:07:48,666 of bein' able to go out and do this on yourself. 196 00:07:48,702 --> 00:07:50,542 Thanks for advising me about this. 197 00:07:50,571 --> 00:07:53,911 But I just don't think that, uh, you need my help on this at all. 198 00:07:56,009 --> 00:07:57,039 -Get the word out. I'm driving. 199 00:07:57,077 --> 00:07:59,577 -Candle Nights is here! 200 00:07:59,613 --> 00:08:02,553 -Candle Nights is here! Happy Candle Nights! 201 00:08:02,583 --> 00:08:03,783 -All right. Can you guys be funnier? 202 00:08:03,817 --> 00:08:05,587 You guys aren't doing anything funny. 203 00:08:05,619 --> 00:08:08,089 -Yeah, baby, it's Candle Nights! 204 00:08:08,121 --> 00:08:09,961 -Yeah. -Aus-- Austin Powers. 205 00:08:09,990 --> 00:08:12,290 -Candle Nights is a... No, I didn't get it. 206 00:08:12,325 --> 00:08:13,955 -Get up there and go buck wild. 207 00:08:13,994 --> 00:08:16,034 -Merry Candle Nights, everyone! 208 00:08:16,063 --> 00:08:18,633 -Candle Nights! -Candle Nights is upon you! 209 00:08:18,666 --> 00:08:22,696 -Happy Candle Nights, everyone. -I have no idea where we are. 210 00:08:22,736 --> 00:08:25,006 -Where are we? -Where are we? 211 00:08:25,038 --> 00:08:27,108 -Yeah, I mean, we didn't see a single person 212 00:08:27,140 --> 00:08:28,880 while we were out there, so I don't know 213 00:08:28,909 --> 00:08:30,709 that we necessarily spread the cheer around. 214 00:08:30,744 --> 00:08:32,614 -No, and we did it at, like, 1 p.m. on a Thursday. 215 00:08:32,646 --> 00:08:34,006 -For, like, 4 minutes, yeah. -No one was home. 216 00:08:34,047 --> 00:08:35,877 -Yeah. I've got a plan. -All right. 217 00:08:35,916 --> 00:08:37,816 Great. -Let's give up. 218 00:08:37,851 --> 00:08:39,021 -Oh, Griffin, come on. -Let's give up. 219 00:08:39,052 --> 00:08:41,622 I'll give up and go to the vape shop. 220 00:08:41,655 --> 00:08:43,655 I've yet to find a problem that vaping can't solve. 221 00:08:43,691 --> 00:08:45,031 -Okay. I've... 222 00:08:45,058 --> 00:08:47,028 -Brought to you by The Vaping Council. 223 00:08:47,060 --> 00:08:49,100 -We're dangerous. -Okay. 224 00:08:49,129 --> 00:08:50,859 -Hold on. -[ Laughs ] I've got a plan. 225 00:08:50,898 --> 00:08:52,568 Why don't we divide and conquer? 226 00:08:52,600 --> 00:08:54,700 Each one of us will pick a task 227 00:08:54,735 --> 00:08:56,935 that we can do that will help spread the Candle Nights cheer. 228 00:08:56,970 --> 00:08:59,140 Right? Uh, I could throw a -- 229 00:08:59,172 --> 00:09:01,842 a nativity, the best Candle Nights nativity 230 00:09:01,875 --> 00:09:03,675 that this town has ever seen. 231 00:09:03,711 --> 00:09:05,011 -And now it's funny you should bring that up 232 00:09:05,045 --> 00:09:06,645 because I've been planning 233 00:09:06,680 --> 00:09:08,950 on doing a miracle for Candle Nights. 234 00:09:08,982 --> 00:09:12,792 'Cause what's a holiday without a good, old-fashioned miracle? 235 00:09:12,820 --> 00:09:15,720 -I'm gonna decorate Huntington, two to tip. 236 00:09:15,756 --> 00:09:18,056 People are going to be psyched. 237 00:09:18,091 --> 00:09:21,161 -Well, what are we waitin' for with all this jibber-jabber? 238 00:09:21,194 --> 00:09:23,934 Let's get out there and change this city forever. 239 00:09:23,964 --> 00:09:26,674 -Yeah. -* Curtains going up 240 00:09:26,700 --> 00:09:30,740 * And we are on 241 00:09:30,771 --> 00:09:33,071 -What was that? -It's a transition 242 00:09:33,106 --> 00:09:35,606 into the k-- like, and then... 243 00:09:35,643 --> 00:09:37,683 -Off the three go, each now with a mission, 244 00:09:37,711 --> 00:09:40,151 to touch a hometown that refuses to listen. 245 00:09:40,180 --> 00:09:43,950 One staging, one miracle, one box full of lights, 246 00:09:43,984 --> 00:09:47,894 it's time to force feed Huntington Candle Nights. 247 00:09:47,921 --> 00:09:50,221 ** 248 00:09:50,257 --> 00:09:51,887 -Hey, there, Halloween. 249 00:09:51,925 --> 00:09:53,825 Meet my friend, Candle Nights. 250 00:09:53,861 --> 00:09:55,231 -Takin' miracles at a good price. 251 00:09:55,262 --> 00:09:59,102 I need a miracle, please. 252 00:09:59,132 --> 00:10:01,702 -Oh, no. -Three brothers. 253 00:10:01,735 --> 00:10:03,095 And they all have basketballs. 254 00:10:03,136 --> 00:10:05,906 They all have giant dongs. 255 00:10:05,939 --> 00:10:07,939 -Alley-oop. 256 00:10:07,975 --> 00:10:09,135 [ Grunts ] 257 00:10:16,183 --> 00:10:18,893 -What am I gonna do? The show's tonight. 258 00:10:18,919 --> 00:10:21,119 I mean, this is barely even a real TV show. 259 00:10:21,154 --> 00:10:24,424 We haven't even been able to get any celebrities. 260 00:10:24,457 --> 00:10:27,257 [ Gasps ] I've got it. 261 00:10:27,294 --> 00:10:29,864 -Three brothers, Justice, Tyler, Gordon. 262 00:10:29,897 --> 00:10:32,867 Justice, he's got a huge dong. 263 00:10:32,900 --> 00:10:35,840 -I've got a lead on a Candle Nights miracle. 264 00:10:35,869 --> 00:10:38,009 That things gonna work out great. 265 00:10:38,038 --> 00:10:40,238 Let's go. 266 00:10:40,273 --> 00:10:44,143 -Kobe. 267 00:10:44,177 --> 00:10:46,907 Ow! Don't touch. Hey, yeah, don't touch it. 268 00:10:46,947 --> 00:10:48,847 -Was it, like, a real shock? -Yeah, bud. 269 00:10:48,882 --> 00:10:51,022 -Oh. -Hey, Griffin here. 270 00:10:51,051 --> 00:10:52,891 Just wanna let you know that, during that last bit, 271 00:10:52,920 --> 00:10:54,220 I actually got electrocuted. 272 00:10:54,254 --> 00:10:56,164 That's not a joke, nearly died. 273 00:10:56,189 --> 00:10:58,259 So, Justin and Travis, good luck with the rest of your segments. 274 00:10:58,291 --> 00:11:00,031 But go bone yourself. 275 00:11:00,060 --> 00:11:01,860 I'm gonna actually go home and play Pokemon now. 276 00:11:01,895 --> 00:11:03,025 See you later. 277 00:11:03,063 --> 00:11:05,973 -Get it out. Pass it. 278 00:11:05,999 --> 00:11:09,839 Squeeze it out. 279 00:11:09,870 --> 00:11:11,270 Think! 280 00:11:11,304 --> 00:11:13,914 -If the person is here that I'm told is here, 281 00:11:13,941 --> 00:11:15,711 this is gonna be great. 282 00:11:15,743 --> 00:11:17,043 I've just gotta get in there. And I've gotta find them. 283 00:11:17,077 --> 00:11:18,177 Just stay with me and let's see what we can do. 284 00:11:18,211 --> 00:11:19,281 Okay? 285 00:11:27,520 --> 00:11:30,890 [ Video game music plays ] 286 00:11:30,924 --> 00:11:32,894 -Uh, I wasn't joking. I'm done -- I'm done out there. 287 00:11:32,926 --> 00:11:35,326 So... 288 00:11:35,362 --> 00:11:38,202 -The going is tough, stamina strong. 289 00:11:38,231 --> 00:11:40,201 What once was a pony is... [ Cellphone chimes, vibrates ] 290 00:11:40,233 --> 00:11:43,503 I'm sorry. 291 00:11:43,536 --> 00:11:46,006 You've got Lin. -Lin, it's the J-Man. 292 00:11:46,039 --> 00:11:47,209 Tubes, how are you, man? 293 00:11:47,240 --> 00:11:48,940 -Hey. Uh, Justin, what's goin' on? 294 00:11:48,976 --> 00:11:51,906 -Hey, so I'm workin' on a -- a Candle Nights tableau. 295 00:11:51,945 --> 00:11:55,045 And I can't seem to nail it. 296 00:11:55,082 --> 00:11:57,022 And, uh, I -- 297 00:11:57,050 --> 00:12:00,090 I guess I'm just gonna run you through what I have right now. 298 00:12:00,120 --> 00:12:03,990 What we've got, uh, depicted is sort of three brothers 299 00:12:04,024 --> 00:12:07,764 with about seven basketballs in between them. 300 00:12:07,795 --> 00:12:12,065 Uh, they're all like mid-dunk or about ready to dunk. 301 00:12:12,099 --> 00:12:14,229 And they've -- they've just got huge... 302 00:12:14,267 --> 00:12:15,797 -I'm sorry. Are you asking me 303 00:12:15,836 --> 00:12:17,766 to actually help you 304 00:12:17,805 --> 00:12:19,065 write the story of Candle Nights, 305 00:12:19,106 --> 00:12:20,236 the thing you made up? 306 00:12:20,273 --> 00:12:22,543 -Oh, help me write it, a collaboration, 307 00:12:22,575 --> 00:12:24,105 that's a great idea 308 00:12:24,144 --> 00:12:25,784 'cause I think that would help to generate 309 00:12:25,813 --> 00:12:27,213 a lot of heat, very buzzy. 310 00:12:27,247 --> 00:12:30,047 -I'm loving that. It's just the visual imagery. 311 00:12:30,083 --> 00:12:32,193 I'm worried the dongs are too prominent 312 00:12:32,219 --> 00:12:34,789 'cause they've all got giant dongs. 313 00:12:34,822 --> 00:12:38,232 And I'm wondering how you toned back the dongs in "Hamilton." 314 00:12:38,258 --> 00:12:41,128 -Well, Justin, every first draft has a lot of dongs. 315 00:12:41,161 --> 00:12:42,831 Any screenwriter will tell you that. 316 00:12:42,863 --> 00:12:44,873 -Yeah. -Um, I'm in the middle 317 00:12:44,898 --> 00:12:47,028 of filming your thing for your show. 318 00:12:47,067 --> 00:12:49,067 I -- I really don't have time to help you with this. 319 00:12:49,102 --> 00:12:51,942 I mean, you've got -- you've got two brothers. 320 00:12:51,972 --> 00:12:53,142 Uh, uh, there -- there's gotta be 321 00:12:53,173 --> 00:12:54,883 a dong you can lose among the three. 322 00:12:54,908 --> 00:12:57,278 -Okay, listen. If your dong is super prominent 323 00:12:57,310 --> 00:12:59,010 in the thing you're doing, 324 00:12:59,046 --> 00:13:01,006 please ask them to tone it back because I can't. 325 00:13:01,048 --> 00:13:03,278 This is really dong-heavy material already. 326 00:13:03,316 --> 00:13:04,276 -And, well, you know, they say, 327 00:13:04,317 --> 00:13:05,947 if you set up a dong in act one, 328 00:13:05,986 --> 00:13:07,086 you've got to pay it off in act three. 329 00:13:07,120 --> 00:13:09,090 You know, ch-- chase your bliss. 330 00:13:09,122 --> 00:13:10,162 Good luck with those dongs. 331 00:13:10,190 --> 00:13:12,290 -Bye. -Okay. 332 00:13:12,325 --> 00:13:13,885 Bye. 333 00:13:13,927 --> 00:13:16,127 I'm sorry. Where were we? 334 00:13:16,163 --> 00:13:18,003 -Thanks for the help, Lin. 335 00:13:18,031 --> 00:13:21,071 Sure you're very busy. 336 00:13:21,101 --> 00:13:25,341 [ Video game music plays ] 337 00:13:25,372 --> 00:13:27,312 -Aw, beans, this seems bad. 338 00:13:27,340 --> 00:13:29,440 You would think they'd be done with a few of their missions. 339 00:13:29,476 --> 00:13:31,306 But nope, they've got none. 340 00:13:31,344 --> 00:13:34,184 So the brothers must find all the fight they possess, 341 00:13:34,214 --> 00:13:36,924 or the show might be over or canceled 342 00:13:36,950 --> 00:13:39,190 unless... [ Bells jingle ] 343 00:13:39,219 --> 00:13:42,459 -Tableau, 344 00:13:42,489 --> 00:13:46,959 oh, speak to me, Huntington. 345 00:13:46,994 --> 00:13:48,204 Wait a minute. 346 00:13:48,228 --> 00:13:50,128 Why am I trying to do this all myself? 347 00:13:50,163 --> 00:13:52,273 I need a muse. 348 00:13:52,299 --> 00:13:53,899 Yes. 349 00:13:59,372 --> 00:14:02,242 -Um, Mr. Al? 350 00:14:02,275 --> 00:14:04,175 -Oh, just -- just Al's fine. 351 00:14:04,211 --> 00:14:06,951 -Okay. 352 00:14:06,980 --> 00:14:09,920 -What can I do for you? -I am so glad you asked. 353 00:14:09,950 --> 00:14:13,020 Uh, so the long and the short of it is, 354 00:14:13,053 --> 00:14:14,993 I promised my brothers, 355 00:14:15,022 --> 00:14:17,322 Justin and Griffin, a Candle Nights miracle. 356 00:14:17,357 --> 00:14:20,357 And we've been trying to get our idols to come on the show. 357 00:14:20,393 --> 00:14:22,463 And we have just been huge fans of yours 358 00:14:22,495 --> 00:14:24,225 since we were, like, wee, little kids. 359 00:14:24,264 --> 00:14:27,234 And so, uh, I was wondering 360 00:14:27,267 --> 00:14:30,137 if you would be in our TV show 361 00:14:30,170 --> 00:14:31,970 that we're making, uh, 362 00:14:32,005 --> 00:14:34,165 and be the miracle I've been looking for. 363 00:14:34,207 --> 00:14:37,377 -Oh, well, Travis, I'm, uh, uh, I'm -- 364 00:14:37,410 --> 00:14:39,250 I'm flattered you think I'm a miracle. 365 00:14:39,279 --> 00:14:41,509 But, um, you -- 366 00:14:41,548 --> 00:14:44,518 you realize you don't actually need a celebrity 367 00:14:44,551 --> 00:14:48,061 to come up with your Candle Nights miracle, right? 368 00:14:48,088 --> 00:14:50,388 I mean, I -- I'm sure there's a certain je ne sais quoi 369 00:14:50,423 --> 00:14:52,993 in having a handsome debonair, 370 00:14:53,026 --> 00:14:56,296 beloved internationally renowned figure on your program. 371 00:14:56,329 --> 00:15:01,329 But in the end, it's all just, you know, sparkle and flash. 372 00:15:01,368 --> 00:15:03,398 -Oh, uh, actually sparkle and flash is kinda 373 00:15:03,436 --> 00:15:05,236 what we're looking for. -You know, Travis, 374 00:15:05,272 --> 00:15:07,372 you've been looking all around Huntington for a miracle. 375 00:15:07,407 --> 00:15:10,477 But I think it's been right in front of you this whole time. 376 00:15:10,510 --> 00:15:13,710 Look, you get to go home and make a TV show 377 00:15:13,746 --> 00:15:17,546 with your whole family and all your friends. 378 00:15:17,584 --> 00:15:20,154 That's the miracle. 379 00:15:20,187 --> 00:15:21,447 -That's -- that's... Thank you. 380 00:15:21,488 --> 00:15:23,018 That means a lot. Thank you. 381 00:15:23,056 --> 00:15:24,416 -Sure. -If you could just, like, 382 00:15:24,457 --> 00:15:26,357 say that, basically, like into the camera for me... 383 00:15:26,393 --> 00:15:28,103 -Right here? -Yeah, just, uh, here, 384 00:15:28,128 --> 00:15:29,958 let me turn it around. -You got it? 385 00:15:29,997 --> 00:15:31,127 -Here, if you would just say that right into the camera... 386 00:15:31,164 --> 00:15:32,234 -Vertical video, really? -It's -- 387 00:15:32,265 --> 00:15:33,325 it's the best I've got. 388 00:15:33,366 --> 00:15:35,036 -All right. -Okay. 389 00:15:35,068 --> 00:15:39,008 -Prepare for the nastiest dunk in history. 390 00:15:39,039 --> 00:15:41,339 Do not fake the funk on this nasty dunk. 391 00:15:41,374 --> 00:15:45,554 Three, two, one, dunk. 392 00:15:45,578 --> 00:15:48,178 Good lord, that was very nasty. 393 00:15:48,215 --> 00:15:50,045 What I want you to say is, 394 00:15:50,083 --> 00:15:52,593 "Sure, I'll carry the show again 395 00:15:52,619 --> 00:15:54,989 for you, my dear brothers." 396 00:15:55,022 --> 00:15:58,332 -Sure, I'll carry the show again 397 00:15:58,358 --> 00:16:00,288 for you, my dear brothers. 398 00:16:00,327 --> 00:16:02,157 -Match my tempo. 399 00:16:02,195 --> 00:16:06,165 -I can't believe I can dunk so many basketballs at once. 400 00:16:06,199 --> 00:16:08,199 -Have you prepared a song? 401 00:16:08,235 --> 00:16:10,465 -Sure, brothers, I'll write the show again this week. 402 00:16:10,503 --> 00:16:12,443 -Oops, 403 00:16:12,472 --> 00:16:18,252 I can't believe I farted on all the curtains again. 404 00:16:18,278 --> 00:16:20,078 -Oops. -Oops. 405 00:16:20,113 --> 00:16:21,453 -Oops. -Oops. 406 00:16:21,481 --> 00:16:23,581 -Next. -Oops. [ Chuckles ] 407 00:16:23,616 --> 00:16:26,346 Can't believe I farted on all the curtains again. 408 00:16:26,386 --> 00:16:28,616 -Okay, genius. 409 00:16:28,655 --> 00:16:33,355 Okay, uh, number 11, you're Klump, obviously. 410 00:16:33,393 --> 00:16:36,033 Uh, if you were reading for Klump, clear the stage. 411 00:16:36,063 --> 00:16:38,273 We've got a lot to get through. Okay, great. 412 00:16:38,298 --> 00:16:40,168 Uh, Rick, congratulations. 413 00:16:40,200 --> 00:16:43,470 Jack, you were great. 414 00:16:43,503 --> 00:16:46,213 -The brothers have gathered all nervous to see 415 00:16:46,239 --> 00:16:49,109 if their efforts bring cheer to the WV. 416 00:16:49,142 --> 00:16:51,542 The mics are all hot. And the goofs are all tight. 417 00:16:51,578 --> 00:16:55,318 The audience is horny for this Candle Night. 418 00:16:55,348 --> 00:16:56,418 -Eyes closed. Keep 'em closed. Keep 'em closed. 419 00:16:56,449 --> 00:17:00,189 Okay. And alakazam. 420 00:17:00,220 --> 00:17:02,520 I spent all day and night, really, 421 00:17:02,555 --> 00:17:04,285 if you think about it, working on this. 422 00:17:04,324 --> 00:17:06,364 My heart, soul, guts... 423 00:17:06,393 --> 00:17:07,563 -One... -All went into it. 424 00:17:07,594 --> 00:17:09,834 -One thing... -One thing, just one. 425 00:17:09,862 --> 00:17:11,402 -The first thing -- it's beautiful. 426 00:17:11,431 --> 00:17:12,671 -And that's the only thing. Thank you very much. 427 00:17:12,699 --> 00:17:14,529 Let's go backstage. -There's a second. 428 00:17:14,567 --> 00:17:16,137 Well, there's a second thing. We hired people to do this. 429 00:17:16,169 --> 00:17:17,469 -Yeah. -The art department did this. 430 00:17:17,504 --> 00:17:19,644 -They -- they flaked, took the money and run, 431 00:17:19,672 --> 00:17:22,342 a classic bamboozle. -Griffin, what -- what happened? 432 00:17:22,375 --> 00:17:26,175 -I gave up 'cause I got electrocuted. 433 00:17:26,213 --> 00:17:28,123 -Oh. Okay, wait, 434 00:17:28,148 --> 00:17:30,418 turn around and... 435 00:17:30,450 --> 00:17:33,150 ta-da! 436 00:17:33,186 --> 00:17:35,556 -You've been workin' on this for 12 hours. 437 00:17:35,588 --> 00:17:38,158 -Ta-da. -It's gr-- it's really good. 438 00:17:38,191 --> 00:17:40,131 -I do like the me. 439 00:17:40,160 --> 00:17:42,230 -Yeah, that's a you. -Which one am... 440 00:17:42,262 --> 00:17:43,632 -Me. Oh, that's Griffin, I guess, yeah. 441 00:17:43,663 --> 00:17:45,433 -Okay. Yeah, this is all very accurate. 442 00:17:45,465 --> 00:17:46,625 -And that's Klump? -That's Klump. 443 00:17:46,666 --> 00:17:48,166 -And that's... -Why didn't you use 444 00:17:48,201 --> 00:17:50,171 our real dad as the dad? -He -- he... 445 00:17:50,203 --> 00:17:52,613 Honestly, he didn't do a very good job. 446 00:17:52,639 --> 00:17:55,579 -Okay. -He wasn't very convincing. 447 00:17:55,608 --> 00:17:57,678 -Happy Candle Nights. -Happy Candle Nights. 448 00:17:57,710 --> 00:17:59,350 -Happy Candle Nights. -Happy Candle Nights. 449 00:17:59,379 --> 00:18:00,679 -Happy Candle Nights. -Happy Candle Nights. 450 00:18:00,713 --> 00:18:02,383 -Happy Candle Nights. -Happy Candle Nights. 451 00:18:02,415 --> 00:18:03,575 -Happy Candle Nights. -Happy Candle Nights. 452 00:18:03,616 --> 00:18:06,186 -Happy Candle Nights, Morgan Faye. 453 00:18:06,219 --> 00:18:08,589 -Happy Candle Nights! 454 00:18:08,621 --> 00:18:11,191 -Happy Candle Nights, McElroys. 455 00:18:11,224 --> 00:18:14,334 Don't mess this up. 456 00:18:14,361 --> 00:18:16,231 -Oh, I want to let you guys know, uh, 457 00:18:16,263 --> 00:18:17,663 I have the miracle thing locked down. 458 00:18:17,697 --> 00:18:19,227 I... -Good, I was worried. 459 00:18:19,266 --> 00:18:21,196 -No, I can't wait to show you guys. 460 00:18:21,234 --> 00:18:23,704 ** 461 00:18:26,673 --> 00:18:28,743 -You guys ready? -Yeah. 462 00:18:28,775 --> 00:18:30,735 -We've got about 15 minutes before we start. 463 00:18:30,777 --> 00:18:33,307 I'm gonna pee about four times in that span of time. 464 00:18:33,346 --> 00:18:34,476 -You do pee a lot. -Yeah, it's, like, 465 00:18:34,514 --> 00:18:37,254 a fun thing I do before every show. 466 00:18:37,284 --> 00:18:40,294 ** 467 00:18:48,928 --> 00:18:51,358 -You shouldn't be worried, though. 468 00:18:51,398 --> 00:18:54,228 I mean, Daddy showed up, to help us with this. 469 00:18:54,267 --> 00:18:55,767 -Dad, thank you so much for coming. 470 00:18:55,802 --> 00:18:57,642 -Yeah, thank you. I'm so proud of you boys. 471 00:18:57,670 --> 00:19:00,670 -Thanks, Dad. It's nice to hear you finally say it. 472 00:19:00,707 --> 00:19:04,277 -I know I've never said this, but I love you. 473 00:19:08,515 --> 00:19:10,275 -Extremely nervous, JD. Thank you for asking. 474 00:19:10,317 --> 00:19:11,647 -No, I'm good. I'm feeling great. 475 00:19:11,684 --> 00:19:14,554 ** 476 00:19:19,626 --> 00:19:20,786 Hey, can I tell you guys something? 477 00:19:20,827 --> 00:19:22,557 -Yeah. 478 00:19:22,595 --> 00:19:24,525 -I don't mean to get too real. 479 00:19:24,564 --> 00:19:26,274 But I love you very much. -Okay. 480 00:19:26,299 --> 00:19:27,429 -And I'm glad we did this TV show together. 481 00:19:27,467 --> 00:19:28,667 -Me too. -And I'm glad 482 00:19:28,701 --> 00:19:30,271 we're doin' this actually together. 483 00:19:30,303 --> 00:19:31,573 And I think people are really gonna like it. 484 00:19:31,604 --> 00:19:33,274 -Me too. I feel the -- I feel the same way. 485 00:19:33,306 --> 00:19:37,276 And I just wanna say, just keep it real. 486 00:19:37,310 --> 00:19:40,310 Keep it raw. -Mm-hmm. 487 00:19:40,347 --> 00:19:41,647 -Don't embarrass me out there. 488 00:19:41,681 --> 00:19:43,621 -You got it. [ Cheers and applause ] 489 00:19:47,320 --> 00:19:51,220 We're running behind schedule by, like, 15 minutes, Deb. 490 00:19:51,258 --> 00:19:52,788 -Come on, man. -Really? 491 00:19:52,825 --> 00:19:54,585 That's it? 492 00:19:54,627 --> 00:19:57,557 -Come on. -Curtain. 493 00:19:57,597 --> 00:19:59,527 -[ Laughs ] 494 00:19:59,566 --> 00:20:01,996 -Daddy, dial it in. 495 00:20:02,034 --> 00:20:03,504 -[ Indistinct ] 496 00:20:03,536 --> 00:20:06,836 [ Cheers and applause ] 497 00:20:06,873 --> 00:20:09,413 -Also, this show isn't for kids, 498 00:20:09,442 --> 00:20:11,612 which I mention only so the babies out there 499 00:20:11,644 --> 00:20:13,014 will know how cool they are for listening. 500 00:20:13,045 --> 00:20:14,745 -Get on up. It's podcast time. -Okay. 501 00:20:14,781 --> 00:20:16,321 -That's fine. That's good. That's fine. 502 00:20:16,349 --> 00:20:18,619 -What's up, you cool baby? 503 00:20:18,651 --> 00:20:20,751 ** 504 00:20:20,787 --> 00:20:23,787 [ Cheers and applause ] 505 00:20:29,762 --> 00:20:31,532 -Hello, everybody. 506 00:20:31,564 --> 00:20:32,734 And welcome to "My Brother, My Brother and Me," 507 00:20:32,765 --> 00:20:34,295 an advice show for the modern era. 508 00:20:34,334 --> 00:20:37,044 I'm your oldest brother, Justin McElroy. 509 00:20:37,069 --> 00:20:40,409 -I'm your middlest brother, Travis McElroy. 510 00:20:40,440 --> 00:20:43,580 -And I'm your sweet baby brother, Griffin McElroy. 511 00:20:43,610 --> 00:20:48,680 [ Cheers and applause ] 512 00:20:48,715 --> 00:20:54,315 -Like Chilean miners emerging from the mines, 513 00:20:54,354 --> 00:20:55,724 we've returned to you, Huntington, 514 00:20:55,755 --> 00:20:58,355 for this, the third annual observation 515 00:20:58,391 --> 00:21:00,891 of Candle Nights. 516 00:21:00,927 --> 00:21:02,727 -We take your questions, and we turn them alchemy 517 00:21:02,762 --> 00:21:04,402 like into wisdom. 518 00:21:04,431 --> 00:21:05,831 You look like you have a super good question. 519 00:21:05,865 --> 00:21:09,065 -I hope you guys can help me. I'm a delivery driver. 520 00:21:09,101 --> 00:21:12,071 I'm really bad at greeting people. 521 00:21:12,104 --> 00:21:13,474 -I thought you were gonna say at driving. 522 00:21:13,506 --> 00:21:15,506 -Yeah. [ Laughter ] 523 00:21:15,542 --> 00:21:16,642 -I want a mud... 524 00:21:16,676 --> 00:21:20,646 -Slide! [ Cheers and applause ] 525 00:21:20,680 --> 00:21:22,080 -Once, there was a young, 526 00:21:22,114 --> 00:21:24,724 moist couple named Shen Yu and Studabaker. 527 00:21:24,751 --> 00:21:26,751 Shen Yu decided that they would purchase 528 00:21:26,786 --> 00:21:28,816 Studabaker a pedantic Candle Nights gift, 529 00:21:28,855 --> 00:21:32,785 no matter what. [ Laughter ] 530 00:21:32,825 --> 00:21:35,495 The end. 531 00:21:35,528 --> 00:21:38,598 [ Cheers and applause ] 532 00:21:40,933 --> 00:21:46,513 -So, uh, my girlfriend said that in order for me 533 00:21:46,539 --> 00:21:49,939 to ask her to get married, and for her to say, "Yes," 534 00:21:49,976 --> 00:21:52,646 I'd have to ask you on this show. 535 00:21:52,679 --> 00:21:53,749 -You had to ask us or her? 536 00:21:53,780 --> 00:21:55,950 -Uh, her. -Okay. 537 00:21:55,982 --> 00:21:57,552 -I'm sorry. I'm so nervous. 538 00:21:57,584 --> 00:22:01,624 -Hey, is she here? -Come on down! 539 00:22:01,654 --> 00:22:03,824 I know it's our show, but this is your moment. 540 00:22:03,856 --> 00:22:06,756 -Will you marry me? -She said, "Yes!" 541 00:22:06,793 --> 00:22:09,803 [ Cheers and applause ] 542 00:22:14,967 --> 00:22:18,737 -For Candle Nights, I promised my brothers a miracle. 543 00:22:18,771 --> 00:22:21,711 Ladies and gentlemen, Weird Al. [ Cheers and applause ] 544 00:22:21,741 --> 00:22:24,441 -Hello, Huntington. Happy Candle Nights. 545 00:22:24,477 --> 00:22:28,447 I just wanted to let you know that you are the miracle. 546 00:22:28,481 --> 00:22:32,451 [ Cheers and applause ] -What? 547 00:22:32,485 --> 00:22:34,145 My name is Justin McElroy. 548 00:22:34,186 --> 00:22:35,716 -I'm Travis McElroy. -I'm Griffin McElroy. 549 00:22:35,755 --> 00:22:37,585 -This has been "My Brother, My Brother and Me." 550 00:22:37,624 --> 00:22:40,734 Kiss your dad square on the lips. 551 00:22:40,760 --> 00:22:43,730 [ Cheers and applause ] 552 00:22:43,763 --> 00:22:46,773 ** 553 00:22:50,837 --> 00:22:53,807 -For now, all is done. With the brothers and dad, 554 00:22:53,840 --> 00:22:57,440 which, just like our Mad Libs, is happy and sad. 555 00:22:57,477 --> 00:22:59,847 They filled us with joy, with endless delight, 556 00:22:59,879 --> 00:23:02,479 with goofs and advice on this magical night. 557 00:23:02,515 --> 00:23:05,415 So the spirit's alive for the McElroy three, 558 00:23:05,452 --> 00:23:08,622 the boys of "My Brother, My Brother and Me." 559 00:23:08,655 --> 00:23:11,415 What's now is a horse began as a pony. 560 00:23:11,458 --> 00:23:12,628 This is legally binding. 561 00:23:12,659 --> 00:23:15,599 Give Griffin my Tony. Wait a minute. 562 00:23:15,628 --> 00:23:17,758 What? 563 00:23:17,797 --> 00:23:18,927 Did Griffin add that in? 564 00:23:18,965 --> 00:23:20,795 Can I see the script for a second? 565 00:23:20,833 --> 00:23:23,503 Thank you. 566 00:23:23,536 --> 00:23:24,896 Is this just... 567 00:23:24,937 --> 00:23:26,637 This is just pages of stuff 568 00:23:26,673 --> 00:23:29,583 Griffin wanted to get me on tape saying. 569 00:23:29,609 --> 00:23:31,909 "Griffin is the strongest." 570 00:23:31,944 --> 00:23:34,714 "Griffin is like a sexier Elijah Wood." 571 00:23:36,849 --> 00:23:39,519 "Garfield monstrosity, torsy, torsy..." 572 00:23:39,552 --> 00:23:41,552 Okay. All right. I'll go to this part. 573 00:23:41,588 --> 00:23:44,558 As they sat and reflected, fake snow on the ground, 574 00:23:44,591 --> 00:23:47,731 their audience meandered through their riverside town. 575 00:23:47,760 --> 00:23:50,660 And you could hear them exclaim as they walked out of sight, 576 00:23:50,697 --> 00:23:55,967 "Other holidays are fine, but they're no Candle Nights." 577 00:23:56,002 --> 00:24:00,542 -I can't believe it -- that we actually did it. 578 00:24:00,573 --> 00:24:03,543 -That we did a l-- a live show with a bunch of folks? 579 00:24:03,576 --> 00:24:06,246 Or that we created six episodes of a television show 580 00:24:06,278 --> 00:24:08,778 without making complete jags of ourselves? 581 00:24:08,815 --> 00:24:11,675 -I mean, point two is yet to be confirmed. 582 00:24:11,718 --> 00:24:12,888 -That's true. 583 00:24:12,919 --> 00:24:14,249 -That's true. We haven't wrapped. 584 00:24:14,286 --> 00:24:15,716 -Even if the show doesn't come together 585 00:24:15,755 --> 00:24:17,955 exactly how we want, and I have no idea. 586 00:24:17,990 --> 00:24:19,890 I might have gotten the edit. 587 00:24:19,926 --> 00:24:23,096 I -- I had so much fun makin' it. 588 00:24:23,129 --> 00:24:25,969 I just wish we did -- did stuff like this more often. 589 00:24:25,998 --> 00:24:27,968 Um... -Made television shows? 590 00:24:28,000 --> 00:24:29,940 -Made TV more? -I don't know why it takes 591 00:24:29,969 --> 00:24:31,769 a camera to get all of us in the same place. 592 00:24:31,804 --> 00:24:33,014 -Oh, come on! 593 00:24:33,039 --> 00:24:34,939 -Th -- they had to pay to get us here! 594 00:24:34,974 --> 00:24:38,784 -Yeah, but, like, I'm just glad you guys finally got onboard. 595 00:24:38,811 --> 00:24:40,511 -I've really enjoyed doin' it with you guys. 596 00:24:40,547 --> 00:24:42,817 -Yeah. I've enjoyed it, too, buddy. 597 00:24:42,849 --> 00:24:45,649 Yeah. Jus, anything you wanna add? 598 00:24:45,685 --> 00:24:49,755 -No. I just, um, 599 00:24:49,789 --> 00:24:51,719 uh, the whole time, I worried I wasn't 600 00:24:51,758 --> 00:24:55,858 a-a-appreciating this enough. 601 00:24:55,895 --> 00:24:58,995 And, uh, I feel like, for once, 602 00:24:59,031 --> 00:25:03,671 we really, I don't know, 603 00:25:03,703 --> 00:25:05,743 did the most we could with somethin'. 604 00:25:05,772 --> 00:25:07,912 -Yeah, I love you. -Love you, too. 605 00:25:07,940 --> 00:25:10,010 -I love both of you boys. -I love you, bubby. 606 00:25:10,042 --> 00:25:12,752 ** 607 00:25:12,779 --> 00:25:13,979 -[ Sniffles ] -You givin' us that Emmy juice? 608 00:25:14,013 --> 00:25:15,753 Oh, my God. It's a-flowin'! 609 00:25:15,782 --> 00:25:18,122 The Emmy juice is flowin'! -Let it flow. 610 00:25:18,150 --> 00:25:19,920 -Let that Emmy juice flow freely. 611 00:25:19,952 --> 00:25:21,822 -I need that Emmy to validate everything we've... 612 00:25:21,854 --> 00:25:23,164 -Okay. 613 00:25:23,189 --> 00:25:25,089 We don't need to, like... -Does it taste greatness? 614 00:25:25,124 --> 00:25:26,694 -Yes... -Mm. 615 00:25:26,726 --> 00:25:28,896 -Yes, cry. -I do love you. 616 00:25:28,928 --> 00:25:31,058 I don't enjoy you, either of you. 617 00:25:31,097 --> 00:25:32,667 -[ Laughs ] As -- as people, 618 00:25:32,699 --> 00:25:35,069 I don't like you very much as people. 619 00:25:35,101 --> 00:25:36,741 -That feels like a good place to... 620 00:25:36,769 --> 00:25:37,999 -I feel like the credits have all gone passed. 621 00:25:38,037 --> 00:25:39,867 -I feel like they're going right now. 622 00:25:39,906 --> 00:25:41,066 Oh, I love you guys. 623 00:25:41,107 --> 00:25:42,837 I loved his work! -I think that's a cut. 624 00:25:42,875 --> 00:25:44,075 I think that's a cut. -All right. 625 00:25:44,110 --> 00:25:45,750 -Season wrap on the McElroys. 626 00:25:45,778 --> 00:25:47,878 -That's a...Whew! -That's it! 627 00:25:47,914 --> 00:25:49,784 And cut. -Cut. 628 00:25:49,816 --> 00:25:51,116 -I still see the lights. 629 00:25:51,150 --> 00:25:52,720 Let's go ahead and... -Cut, cut, cut, cut, cut. 630 00:25:52,752 --> 00:25:54,752 -Cut those bad boys. I'm done. 631 00:25:54,787 --> 00:25:56,787 -Cut. -Okay. 632 00:25:56,823 --> 00:25:58,633 I'm gonna go home. 633 00:26:01,027 --> 00:26:04,127 -J-Man, all over town. 634 00:26:04,163 --> 00:26:08,673 And then it's, like, the cre-- above me, with the letters, 635 00:26:08,701 --> 00:26:10,901 "J-Man, all over town." 636 00:26:10,937 --> 00:26:13,367 ** 637 00:26:13,405 --> 00:26:15,605 Mm, that'd be nice. 638 00:26:17,744 --> 00:26:19,784 Maybe some day. 639 00:26:22,214 --> 00:26:25,054 [ Grunts ] 640 00:26:25,084 --> 00:26:27,624 I wish that had been fake. 641 00:26:27,654 --> 00:26:31,764 ** 642 00:26:31,791 --> 00:26:34,131 Thanks, Huntington. 643 00:26:34,160 --> 00:26:36,230 Cut! cut! 644 00:26:36,262 --> 00:26:38,062 Cut! 645 00:26:44,103 --> 00:26:45,713 I thought that went really good. 646 00:26:45,738 --> 00:26:46,968 -Yeah, I can't believe we pulled it off. 647 00:26:47,006 --> 00:26:48,106 -I think it went really well. -Oh, geez! 648 00:26:48,140 --> 00:26:49,740 -Oh, my God! -Oh -- oh, God. 649 00:26:49,776 --> 00:26:52,806 Oh... -Clown box. 650 00:26:52,845 --> 00:26:54,405 -That's actually really nice. -Thank you. 651 00:26:54,446 --> 00:26:55,976 -What's he doin'? 652 00:26:59,051 --> 00:27:01,191 -Oh. Hey, nice -- free puzzle. -Oh. 653 00:27:01,220 --> 00:27:02,820 -No! Oh, God. No! -Justin, Justin. No! 654 00:27:02,855 --> 00:27:04,115 -What? -That's how he does -- 655 00:27:04,156 --> 00:27:05,256 that's how he does you. -That's how he does you. 656 00:27:05,291 --> 00:27:08,661 -Oh. -Oh, clown box. 657 00:27:08,695 --> 00:27:09,825 -Oh, what a scamp. 658 00:27:09,862 --> 00:27:10,932 -You guys... -See ya later! 659 00:27:10,963 --> 00:27:12,903 -See ya later! -Bye, clown box! 660 00:27:12,932 --> 00:27:14,932 [ Cellphone chimes, vibrates ] 49262

Can't find what you're looking for?
Get subtitles in any language from opensubtitles.com, and translate them here.