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1
00:00:14,415 --> 00:00:23,357
**
2
00:00:23,424 --> 00:00:31,699
**
3
00:00:31,765 --> 00:00:34,602
* I eat filet mignons
seven times a day *
4
00:00:34,668 --> 00:00:37,338
* My bathtub's filled
with Perrier *
5
00:00:37,405 --> 00:00:40,708
* What can I say
This is the life *
6
00:00:40,774 --> 00:00:43,944
* I buy a dozen cars
when I'm in the mood *
7
00:00:44,011 --> 00:00:46,180
* I hire somebody
to chew my food *
8
00:00:46,247 --> 00:00:50,017
* I'm an upwardly mobile dude
This is the life *
9
00:00:50,084 --> 00:00:53,121
* They say that
money corrupts you *
10
00:00:53,187 --> 00:00:55,356
* But I can't really tell *
11
00:00:55,423 --> 00:00:57,491
* I got the whole world
at my feet *
12
00:00:57,558 --> 00:00:59,527
* And I think
it's pretty swell *
13
00:00:59,593 --> 00:01:02,230
* I got women lined up
outside my door *
14
00:01:02,296 --> 00:01:04,565
* They've been waitin' there
since a week before *
15
00:01:04,632 --> 00:01:07,701
* Who could ask for more
This is the life *
16
00:01:26,787 --> 00:01:30,023
* Whaa da whaa da *
* You're dead
for a real long time *
17
00:01:30,090 --> 00:01:32,059
* You just can't prevent it *
18
00:01:32,126 --> 00:01:34,362
* So if money
can't buy happiness *
19
00:01:34,428 --> 00:01:36,797
* I guess
I'll have to rent it *
20
00:01:38,299 --> 00:01:41,502
* Yeah, every day
I make the front page news *
21
00:01:41,569 --> 00:01:43,604
* No time to pay my dues *
22
00:01:43,671 --> 00:01:47,341
* I got a million pairs of shoes
This is the life *
23
00:01:47,408 --> 00:01:50,178
* That's right, I'm the king
Number one *
24
00:01:50,244 --> 00:01:52,613
* I buy monogrammed Kleenex
by the ton *
25
00:01:52,680 --> 00:01:54,882
* I pay the bills
I call the shots *
26
00:01:54,948 --> 00:01:57,318
* I grease the palms
I buy the yachts *
27
00:01:57,385 --> 00:01:59,420
* One thing I can guarantee *
28
00:01:59,487 --> 00:02:01,589
* The best things in life
they sure ain't free *
29
00:02:01,655 --> 00:02:03,724
* It's such a thrill
just to be me *
30
00:02:03,791 --> 00:02:06,360
* This is the life *
31
00:02:06,427 --> 00:02:10,130
* Ahh *
* This is the life **
32
00:02:20,140 --> 00:02:22,243
[ Horn Honks ]
33
00:02:33,254 --> 00:02:36,190
Anybody hungry?
[ Arf Arf ]
34
00:02:36,257 --> 00:02:39,760
Didn't think so.
Just kidding.
35
00:02:39,827 --> 00:02:42,463
Okay, fellas, food time.
36
00:02:42,530 --> 00:02:44,932
Bert. Liver, no onions.
37
00:02:44,998 --> 00:02:48,068
Here you go, Bertie.
There you go.
38
00:02:48,135 --> 00:02:52,406
And for dessert,
there you go.
39
00:02:54,542 --> 00:02:58,679
Connie, Mack, you kids wanted
the tuna, hold the Mayo.
40
00:02:58,746 --> 00:03:00,614
Lovely choice.
41
00:03:00,681 --> 00:03:04,585
I'm not crazy about
you two living together.
42
00:03:04,652 --> 00:03:07,187
Marvin, you ordered
the flounder.
43
00:03:07,255 --> 00:03:10,258
I didn't like
the way it looked,
44
00:03:10,324 --> 00:03:12,493
so I prepared
something special.
45
00:03:12,560 --> 00:03:15,596
I think you're
gonna like this.
[ Lips Smacking ]
46
00:03:15,663 --> 00:03:17,598
And maybe not.
[ Telephone Rings ]
47
00:03:17,665 --> 00:03:21,201
Okay, here we go.
[ Ringing ]
48
00:03:21,269 --> 00:03:24,204
- Polly, get that.
- All right.
49
00:03:26,274 --> 00:03:28,476
Kelly's pet shop.
Polly speaking.
50
00:03:28,542 --> 00:03:30,544
It's your mother, Johnny.
51
00:03:30,611 --> 00:03:35,048
- Tell her to hold,
would ya?
- Hang on.
52
00:03:35,115 --> 00:03:37,418
Thanks, pal.
Hiya, Ma.
53
00:03:37,485 --> 00:03:42,456
Uh-huh.
I was just feeding
the animals.
54
00:03:42,523 --> 00:03:45,058
It's probably
just the weather.
55
00:03:45,125 --> 00:03:47,528
I wouldn't
worry about it.
56
00:03:47,595 --> 00:03:50,564
It will probably
get better tomorrow.
57
00:03:50,631 --> 00:03:54,368
If you wouldn't drink
so much, the whole thing
would clear up.
58
00:03:54,435 --> 00:03:56,570
I'll see you later.
59
00:03:56,637 --> 00:04:00,941
[ Bell Rings ]
All right, come here.
Hand it over.
60
00:04:01,008 --> 00:04:03,511
What was that noise?
61
00:04:03,577 --> 00:04:06,614
It was this
little gadget here.
62
00:04:06,680 --> 00:04:09,750
Prevents stealing.
Stops guys like you.
63
00:04:09,817 --> 00:04:13,287
Go ahead. Call the cops.
Let's get this over with.
64
00:04:13,354 --> 00:04:15,255
Ah, pretty tough, huh?
65
00:04:15,323 --> 00:04:16,924
Tough enough.
66
00:04:16,990 --> 00:04:18,892
Yeah?
You like stealing?
67
00:04:18,959 --> 00:04:20,694
Beats paying for it.
68
00:04:20,761 --> 00:04:22,830
You think stealing
makes you a big man?
69
00:04:22,896 --> 00:04:26,367
Bigger than you--
wearing an apron,
feeding monkeys.
70
00:04:26,434 --> 00:04:28,636
Ha ha ha.
Sit down.
71
00:04:28,702 --> 00:04:31,405
I'll tell you where
stealing gets you.
72
00:04:31,472 --> 00:04:33,607
Wake me when
you're through.
73
00:04:33,674 --> 00:04:36,444
I started out just like you.
Must have been 25 years ago.
74
00:04:36,510 --> 00:04:38,612
What's going on?
75
00:04:38,679 --> 00:04:41,281
Don't worry. It'll end
in a couple of minutes.
76
00:04:41,349 --> 00:04:45,786
It always does this
when I talk about the past.
Anyway, it was 1910.
77
00:04:47,020 --> 00:04:48,889
Times were good in America.
78
00:04:48,956 --> 00:04:54,227
There was plenty of everything--
jobs, security, laughs.
79
00:04:54,294 --> 00:04:56,263
America was in great shape,
80
00:04:56,330 --> 00:04:58,366
except for
President William Taft.
81
00:04:58,432 --> 00:05:00,368
Was he a porker.
82
00:05:00,434 --> 00:05:04,538
He weighed as much
as Teddy Roosevelt and
half of William McKinley.
83
00:05:04,605 --> 00:05:07,541
Immigrants came
from all over the world,
84
00:05:07,608 --> 00:05:10,043
looking for a better life.
85
00:05:10,110 --> 00:05:12,279
And over 97% of them...
86
00:05:12,346 --> 00:05:15,816
settled in a two-block area
of New York City.
87
00:05:15,883 --> 00:05:18,719
There used to be a law called
the McCoy Act of 1909.
88
00:05:18,786 --> 00:05:20,921
It said immigrants
wanting citizenship...
89
00:05:20,988 --> 00:05:23,557
had to stay
out of their apartments
at least four hours a day...
90
00:05:23,624 --> 00:05:26,594
and walk the streets
with hats on.
91
00:05:26,660 --> 00:05:30,130
Most immigrants
didn't find the streets
paved with gold.
92
00:05:30,197 --> 00:05:32,566
Instead,
they found hard times.
93
00:05:32,633 --> 00:05:36,069
Nobody had it tougher
than my mom, Mom Kelly.
94
00:05:36,136 --> 00:05:38,539
She was kind and sweet.
95
00:05:38,606 --> 00:05:41,942
She had a colorful way
of putting things.
96
00:05:42,009 --> 00:05:46,414
The Lower East Side--
this really sucks.
97
00:05:48,015 --> 00:05:53,086
- I was just starting out
in business.
- Hey, kid, you got a paper?
98
00:05:53,153 --> 00:05:56,289
Hiya, Mom.
Hiya, Johnny.
99
00:05:56,356 --> 00:05:58,258
Your pancreas
feeling better?
100
00:05:58,325 --> 00:06:00,260
Don't worry about me.
101
00:06:00,327 --> 00:06:02,229
Just keep yourself warm.
102
00:06:02,295 --> 00:06:03,831
Thanks, Mom.
103
00:06:03,897 --> 00:06:05,298
Oh, God!
104
00:06:05,365 --> 00:06:07,835
It's the worst July
in years.
105
00:06:07,901 --> 00:06:09,770
Go on upstairs.
106
00:06:09,837 --> 00:06:12,706
After I sell these,
we'll celebrate your birthday.
107
00:06:12,773 --> 00:06:15,709
Ahh.
You're my darling boy.
108
00:06:15,776 --> 00:06:17,778
Hey, kid, paper here.
Yeah.
109
00:06:24,818 --> 00:06:28,288
All right. Tribune.
Get your Tribune.
110
00:06:28,355 --> 00:06:30,323
Get your Tribune.
111
00:06:30,390 --> 00:06:32,292
[ Horn Honks ]
[ Tires Screech ]
112
00:06:32,359 --> 00:06:36,063
[ Crash ]
Aah!
113
00:06:38,466 --> 00:06:40,333
A lousy penny.
Get your Tribune.
114
00:06:40,400 --> 00:06:42,436
This is my corner.
115
00:06:42,503 --> 00:06:45,272
Danny Vermin don't move
for nobody, Kelly.
116
00:06:45,338 --> 00:06:47,140
Oh, yeah?
Yeah.
117
00:06:47,207 --> 00:06:50,611
It's okay, Officer.
I can handle this myself.
118
00:06:54,615 --> 00:06:56,517
Stop the car.
I want to see this.
119
00:06:56,584 --> 00:06:58,519
Yes, sir, Mr. Dundee.
120
00:07:01,388 --> 00:07:03,190
Ha ha ha ha!
121
00:07:03,256 --> 00:07:04,892
And no hard feelings.
122
00:07:04,958 --> 00:07:07,628
You ain't seen
the last of Danny Vermin.
123
00:07:09,463 --> 00:07:11,832
Hey, kid, come here.
124
00:07:14,735 --> 00:07:17,838
I like the way
you handle yourself.
125
00:07:17,905 --> 00:07:19,473
Thanks, mister.
126
00:07:19,540 --> 00:07:22,743
Do you know
who this man is?
127
00:07:22,810 --> 00:07:24,144
I give up.
128
00:07:24,211 --> 00:07:27,280
How'd you like
to make $50?
129
00:07:27,347 --> 00:07:30,450
Do I have to
break the law?
130
00:07:30,518 --> 00:07:32,720
If I broke the law,
131
00:07:32,786 --> 00:07:35,122
it would be like breaking
my mother's heart.
132
00:07:36,256 --> 00:07:38,258
Okay, kid.
133
00:07:38,325 --> 00:07:40,260
But if you
change your mind,
134
00:07:40,327 --> 00:07:42,930
I'll be
at the Club 25.
135
00:08:00,280 --> 00:08:02,750
[ Baby Crying ]
136
00:08:07,721 --> 00:08:10,758
[ Heavy Breathing ]
137
00:08:18,365 --> 00:08:20,668
Dr. Magnus.
How's my mother?
138
00:08:20,734 --> 00:08:22,736
It's her pancreas again.
139
00:08:22,803 --> 00:08:25,272
She'll need an operation
immediately.
140
00:08:25,338 --> 00:08:27,675
How much
will it cost?
141
00:08:27,741 --> 00:08:29,710
$49.95. This week only.
142
00:08:29,777 --> 00:08:32,713
Where can I get
that much money?
143
00:08:32,780 --> 00:08:35,182
Knock over
a gas station.
144
00:08:42,322 --> 00:08:43,857
Hiya, Tommy.
145
00:08:43,924 --> 00:08:45,258
Hi, Johnny.
146
00:08:45,325 --> 00:08:46,727
Hiya, Mom.
147
00:08:46,794 --> 00:08:49,663
You're a sucker
for a left.
148
00:08:49,730 --> 00:08:51,865
Take a break.
149
00:08:51,932 --> 00:08:53,200
I can't.
150
00:08:53,266 --> 00:08:56,236
I'm a year behind on
Mr. Stevenson's shirts.
151
00:08:56,303 --> 00:08:59,006
There's a new law
against washing
on your birthday.
152
00:08:59,072 --> 00:09:02,275
Gosh, Johnny, I really
don't think that's a law.
153
00:09:02,342 --> 00:09:07,280
You won't find it in
your law books because
I just made it up.
154
00:09:07,347 --> 00:09:10,383
Look. He colored
Oliver Wendell Holmes purple.
155
00:09:10,450 --> 00:09:12,352
Isn't that something?
156
00:09:12,419 --> 00:09:14,722
Only 6 years old.
157
00:09:14,788 --> 00:09:17,625
Your poor father
would have been proud.
158
00:09:17,691 --> 00:09:20,193
He wanted you
to be a lawyer.
159
00:09:20,260 --> 00:09:22,663
He could have used one.
160
00:09:22,730 --> 00:09:25,599
You'll make something
of yourself, Tommy.
161
00:09:25,666 --> 00:09:28,101
I'll see that you do.
162
00:09:28,168 --> 00:09:32,205
No mother
was ever blessed
with two finer sons.
163
00:09:32,272 --> 00:09:34,041
Happy birthday, Mom.
164
00:09:34,107 --> 00:09:36,677
Bless the saints!
An ashtray!
165
00:09:36,744 --> 00:09:40,280
I been thinking of
taking up smoking.
166
00:09:40,347 --> 00:09:43,651
How does it feel
to be 29?
167
00:09:43,717 --> 00:09:46,620
I only hope
I reach 30.
168
00:09:46,687 --> 00:09:49,056
Are you all right, Mom?
169
00:09:49,122 --> 00:09:51,091
I'll be fine.
Go back to work.
170
00:09:51,158 --> 00:09:55,128
Don't worry about me.
I'll be all right.
171
00:09:59,733 --> 00:10:01,802
She needs
an operation.
172
00:10:01,869 --> 00:10:05,272
If I broke the law,
I'd break my mother's heart.
173
00:10:05,338 --> 00:10:07,307
$49.95.
174
00:10:07,374 --> 00:10:08,842
You want to make $50?
175
00:10:08,909 --> 00:10:11,278
I just hope
I reach 30.
176
00:10:11,344 --> 00:10:13,781
I'll be
at the Club 25.
177
00:10:13,847 --> 00:10:17,818
Sorry, Mom.
It's the only way.
178
00:10:46,680 --> 00:10:49,049
No more nodding!
179
00:10:50,751 --> 00:10:52,786
Place your bets, please.
180
00:11:15,642 --> 00:11:17,677
Dundee's gang is here.
181
00:11:18,812 --> 00:11:21,214
What's that
bastige want, huh?
182
00:11:27,387 --> 00:11:29,156
How's tricks, Moronie?
183
00:11:29,222 --> 00:11:32,192
What are you
doing here, icehole?
184
00:11:32,259 --> 00:11:36,163
Can't a fellow enjoy
a night out gambling?
185
00:11:36,229 --> 00:11:39,800
Don't bullshty me.
Search him.
186
00:11:39,867 --> 00:11:43,871
We're clean.
I don't bear no grudges,
187
00:11:43,937 --> 00:11:47,240
even though you've
been muscling in
on my territory.
188
00:11:47,307 --> 00:11:49,109
Why, Moronie?
189
00:11:49,176 --> 00:11:51,711
It's a free country,
icehole.
190
00:11:51,779 --> 00:11:53,446
They're clean, boss.
191
00:11:53,513 --> 00:11:57,484
You and the rest of
your bastiges can gamble,
192
00:11:57,550 --> 00:12:00,387
but don't try
no fargin trick.
193
00:12:00,453 --> 00:12:04,091
Otherwise, you'll wind up
with your bells in a sling.
194
00:12:07,027 --> 00:12:10,063
What a mouth
on that guy!
195
00:12:11,664 --> 00:12:13,666
Place your bets, please.
196
00:12:13,733 --> 00:12:15,803
Place your bets.
197
00:12:23,143 --> 00:12:24,411
Hey, kid.
198
00:12:26,346 --> 00:12:27,815
Paper, mister?
199
00:12:33,353 --> 00:12:35,222
Here you go.
200
00:12:36,756 --> 00:12:38,691
Here you are, sir.
201
00:12:38,758 --> 00:12:40,227
Thanks, kid.
202
00:12:43,864 --> 00:12:47,567
Nobody move,
and nobody will get hurt.
203
00:12:47,634 --> 00:12:49,837
All we want
is Moronie's money.
204
00:12:49,903 --> 00:12:52,005
Go ahead, kid.
205
00:12:52,072 --> 00:12:54,574
You fargin sneaky bastige!
206
00:12:54,641 --> 00:12:57,610
I going to take your dwork!
207
00:12:57,677 --> 00:13:01,414
I going to
nail it to the wall!
208
00:13:01,481 --> 00:13:05,485
I going to crush your boils
in a meat grinder!
209
00:13:05,552 --> 00:13:07,921
I cut off your arms!
210
00:13:07,988 --> 00:13:10,958
I shove them
up your icehole!
211
00:13:11,024 --> 00:13:13,360
Dirty sum un a batch!
My own club!
212
00:13:15,028 --> 00:13:16,964
Mr. Dundee, watch out!
213
00:13:19,967 --> 00:13:22,402
Lock the fargin door!
214
00:13:22,469 --> 00:13:24,204
We got Dundee!
215
00:13:27,607 --> 00:13:30,343
Get that lousy kid!
216
00:13:30,410 --> 00:13:31,811
Oh!
217
00:13:38,018 --> 00:13:39,953
Get that kid!
218
00:13:40,020 --> 00:13:43,156
It's only a fargin kid!
219
00:13:43,223 --> 00:13:45,225
Get him!
220
00:13:45,292 --> 00:13:47,560
Give me a gun!
Give me a gun!
221
00:13:51,865 --> 00:13:53,033
Next shooter.
222
00:13:53,100 --> 00:13:55,735
Kid's like a monkey.
Get him!
223
00:13:55,802 --> 00:13:59,306
It's a fargin kid!
Get him!
224
00:14:03,743 --> 00:14:06,479
Hell of
an anniversary, Lou.
225
00:14:06,546 --> 00:14:10,183
I don't believe you guys!
Get him or you all fired!
226
00:14:12,652 --> 00:14:14,687
No, no, no!
227
00:14:14,754 --> 00:14:16,556
Permesso.
228
00:14:16,623 --> 00:14:19,326
Say your prayers,
icehole.
229
00:14:23,863 --> 00:14:25,498
Oh!
230
00:14:26,866 --> 00:14:28,301
Hold it.
231
00:14:28,368 --> 00:14:31,771
Why, you miserable
corksucker!
232
00:14:31,838 --> 00:14:35,008
I gonna
get you for this.
233
00:14:35,075 --> 00:14:38,878
Roman Moronie never forget
a fargin face, kid.
234
00:14:38,946 --> 00:14:41,014
I'll get you.
235
00:14:50,890 --> 00:14:52,692
You okay, boss?
236
00:14:52,759 --> 00:14:56,329
Yeah. Thanks
to this kid and this.
237
00:14:56,396 --> 00:14:58,165
Thanks a lot, kid.
238
00:14:58,231 --> 00:15:01,234
From now on,
you're my boy.
239
00:15:01,301 --> 00:15:04,237
Yeah, kid, you really
live dangerously.
240
00:15:04,304 --> 00:15:07,040
By the way,
what's your name?
Johnny.
241
00:15:07,107 --> 00:15:10,343
Johnny...
Johnny Dangerously.
242
00:15:10,410 --> 00:15:13,813
I should've
never picked that name.
243
00:15:13,880 --> 00:15:15,848
A name like that
you got to live up to.
244
00:15:15,915 --> 00:15:18,051
Act tough.
Put up a front.
245
00:15:18,118 --> 00:15:20,820
I got into a lot of fights.
246
00:15:20,887 --> 00:15:24,191
What's your last name?
Binderhoff.
247
00:15:24,257 --> 00:15:26,626
Don't ever
change that name.
248
00:15:26,693 --> 00:15:28,595
You'll stay
out of trouble.
249
00:15:28,661 --> 00:15:31,264
Anyway, Mom got better.
250
00:15:31,331 --> 00:15:36,303
I didn't do any more jobs
for the Dundee gang.
251
00:15:36,369 --> 00:15:40,373
I grew up your average,
poverty-stricken teenager,
252
00:15:40,440 --> 00:15:43,376
thinking about girls,
my hair, girls.
253
00:15:43,443 --> 00:15:45,378
[ Music Plays ]
254
00:15:59,592 --> 00:16:03,030
I've never seen
anyone dance like that.
255
00:16:05,798 --> 00:16:08,001
Hi, Dr. Magnus.
How's my mother?
256
00:16:08,068 --> 00:16:10,503
It's her thyroid, Johnny.
What's wrong?
257
00:16:10,570 --> 00:16:13,006
We can't find it.
We're gonna have to do
a thyroid search.
258
00:16:13,073 --> 00:16:18,511
How much is that?
You're in luck.
This week, a special--$999.
259
00:16:18,578 --> 00:16:21,881
$999?
260
00:16:21,948 --> 00:16:23,783
Talk about bad luck.
261
00:16:23,850 --> 00:16:27,087
There was only one place
I could get that much money.
262
00:16:27,154 --> 00:16:30,890
So I joined
the Jocko Dundee mob
full-time.
263
00:16:30,957 --> 00:16:34,761
Jocko was still at war
with Roman Moronie.
264
00:16:34,827 --> 00:16:38,965
The years didn't soften Moronie.
He continued to murder
the English language...
265
00:16:39,032 --> 00:16:42,001
and anyone who got in his way.
266
00:16:42,069 --> 00:16:44,937
Moronie had rules for his gang.
267
00:16:45,004 --> 00:16:48,841
First, never park
in his private space.
268
00:16:48,908 --> 00:16:51,744
The Dundee gang was more fun.
269
00:16:51,811 --> 00:16:53,813
We did illegal things,
270
00:16:53,880 --> 00:16:56,683
but we never
bothered the public.
271
00:16:56,749 --> 00:17:00,787
Every Christmas, Jocko returned
some cash to the community.
272
00:17:00,853 --> 00:17:02,855
Every chance I got,
273
00:17:02,922 --> 00:17:04,724
I returned
to the old neighborhood.
274
00:17:04,791 --> 00:17:07,727
They looked up to me there
like I was a folk hero.
275
00:17:07,794 --> 00:17:11,298
"I love Johnny" T-shirts.
I love Johnny!
276
00:17:11,364 --> 00:17:14,767
Johnny, can I follow
in your footsteps?
277
00:17:14,834 --> 00:17:19,439
Sure, kid. Here.
It's burning a hole
in my pocket.
278
00:17:19,506 --> 00:17:21,474
Look, Rosie,
it's Johnny Dangerously.
279
00:17:23,243 --> 00:17:27,247
Mrs. Zimmer,
everybody, over here.
280
00:17:30,583 --> 00:17:33,353
What did I tell you
neighborhood people?
281
00:17:33,420 --> 00:17:36,089
Around here,
you're Johnny Kelly,
282
00:17:36,156 --> 00:17:38,658
a law-abiding
nightclub owner,
283
00:17:38,725 --> 00:17:41,794
not the notorious gangster,
Johnny Dangerously.
284
00:17:41,861 --> 00:17:45,798
Sure, and I'm the pope.
285
00:17:45,865 --> 00:17:48,335
Hey, Pope.
How'd you know?
286
00:17:48,401 --> 00:17:53,240
Johnny, everybody knows
except your mother
and your brother.
287
00:17:53,306 --> 00:17:55,208
And as far
as we're concerned,
288
00:17:55,275 --> 00:17:57,644
nobody will say nothing.
289
00:17:57,710 --> 00:18:00,280
Thanks, Your Holiness.
290
00:18:00,347 --> 00:18:03,550
Build yourself a new gym
at the Vatican.
291
00:18:03,616 --> 00:18:05,685
Ho ho ho ho!
292
00:18:05,752 --> 00:18:07,787
Oh!
293
00:18:07,854 --> 00:18:11,158
Ah, bless you, Johnny.
294
00:18:18,865 --> 00:18:21,368
[ Knock On Door ]
295
00:18:21,434 --> 00:18:22,702
Johnny!
296
00:18:23,836 --> 00:18:25,305
Hiya, Ma.
297
00:18:26,273 --> 00:18:29,742
How's my best girl?
298
00:18:29,809 --> 00:18:31,711
Watch that left, Ma.
299
00:18:31,778 --> 00:18:36,249
I love him,
but someday I'm going to
knock him on his ass.
300
00:18:38,851 --> 00:18:40,720
What you cooking, Ma?
301
00:18:40,787 --> 00:18:42,155
Beer.
302
00:18:42,222 --> 00:18:43,756
With noodles.
303
00:18:43,823 --> 00:18:45,692
Great idea.
304
00:18:48,261 --> 00:18:50,230
So, Ma, what's new?
305
00:18:50,297 --> 00:18:52,299
Me arthritis,
that's new.
306
00:18:52,365 --> 00:18:56,703
One of the muscles
in me calf is shriveling up.
307
00:18:56,769 --> 00:18:59,672
Also, I'm losing sensation
on the left side of me face,
308
00:18:59,739 --> 00:19:02,842
which I think is the beginning
of a neurological disorder.
309
00:19:02,909 --> 00:19:06,679
The rest of me
is in the pink.
310
00:19:06,746 --> 00:19:09,482
You got to take
better care of yourself.
311
00:19:09,549 --> 00:19:13,620
I don't want you doing
other people's laundry.
312
00:19:13,686 --> 00:19:17,224
What are you sayin',
give up me career?
313
00:19:17,290 --> 00:19:19,826
Maybe you ought to retire.
314
00:19:19,892 --> 00:19:22,195
Enjoy the golden years, Ma.
315
00:19:22,262 --> 00:19:24,331
Not do this.
316
00:19:26,733 --> 00:19:29,302
Son, I couldn't
consider retiring,
317
00:19:29,369 --> 00:19:34,441
not so long as I can
still give good laundry.
318
00:19:36,276 --> 00:19:38,278
Where's Tommy?
319
00:19:38,345 --> 00:19:41,781
Don't be talking to me
about Tommy.
320
00:19:41,848 --> 00:19:43,483
Why not?
321
00:19:43,550 --> 00:19:47,086
Because I'm leaving
law school.
322
00:19:47,153 --> 00:19:49,956
If this is some joke,
I ain't laughing.
323
00:19:50,022 --> 00:19:54,461
I'm dropping out of law school
so Sally and I can be married.
You can't change my mind.
324
00:19:54,527 --> 00:19:56,329
Do you want this, Sally?
325
00:19:56,396 --> 00:19:58,865
I want whatever
Tommy wants.
326
00:19:58,931 --> 00:20:01,200
He makes
the decisions.
327
00:20:01,268 --> 00:20:04,103
Sally's place
is in the home.
328
00:20:04,170 --> 00:20:06,239
I intend to support her.
329
00:20:06,306 --> 00:20:09,976
I'll do anything--
shine boots, drive a hack,
blow glass, anything.
330
00:20:10,042 --> 00:20:12,479
Johnny,
talk sense to him.
331
00:20:12,545 --> 00:20:15,748
Can't you see
you're breaking
your mother's heart?
332
00:20:15,815 --> 00:20:17,617
Why, Tommy?
333
00:20:17,684 --> 00:20:21,654
I can't say it
in front of mom.
334
00:20:21,721 --> 00:20:26,293
Okay. I got some business
to take care of.
335
00:20:26,359 --> 00:20:30,229
You meet me at my place--
oh, 10:00, all right?
336
00:20:30,297 --> 00:20:33,800
All right.
You little muskrat.
337
00:20:35,134 --> 00:20:38,371
I'll see you, Sally.
Good-bye.
338
00:20:38,438 --> 00:20:41,574
Ma, don't worry.
I'll straighten
everything out.
339
00:20:41,641 --> 00:20:45,077
Hey, Ma, what's this
in your ear?
340
00:20:45,144 --> 00:20:46,613
$100?
341
00:20:49,816 --> 00:20:53,853
What can't you say
in front of mom?
342
00:20:53,920 --> 00:20:54,921
Nothing, Mom.
343
00:20:54,987 --> 00:20:57,890
I know what you can't say.
You want to get laid.
344
00:20:57,957 --> 00:21:00,427
Mom!
You want to hump
your brains out.
345
00:21:00,493 --> 00:21:03,430
Ba-boom! Ba-boom!
Ba-boom! Ba-boom!
346
00:21:06,299 --> 00:21:07,834
Morning, Pat.
347
00:21:07,900 --> 00:21:09,268
Morning, Johnny.
348
00:21:09,336 --> 00:21:11,304
How's your dear mother?
349
00:21:11,371 --> 00:21:13,673
Much better.
Thanks for asking.
350
00:21:13,740 --> 00:21:16,208
She's such
a wonderful woman.
351
00:21:16,275 --> 00:21:18,311
Yes, she is.
352
00:21:18,378 --> 00:21:21,748
She's got
the smile of an angel.
353
00:21:23,082 --> 00:21:28,355
* I love all the many charms
about you *
354
00:21:28,421 --> 00:21:33,460
* Above all,
I want my arms about you *
355
00:21:33,526 --> 00:21:36,228
* Don't be a naughty baby *
356
00:21:36,295 --> 00:21:39,599
* Come to mama, do *
357
00:21:39,666 --> 00:21:43,536
* My sweet embraceable *
358
00:21:43,603 --> 00:21:46,739
* You **
359
00:21:46,806 --> 00:21:49,842
Oh, Johnny!
Johnny's here!
360
00:21:49,909 --> 00:21:51,811
Johnny!
361
00:21:51,878 --> 00:21:54,881
Johnny, want to be
my first?
It's my turn.
362
00:21:54,947 --> 00:21:57,316
I'm not wearing a bra.
363
00:21:57,384 --> 00:21:59,318
That makes two of us.
364
00:21:59,386 --> 00:22:01,320
I'm a real blonde.
365
00:22:01,388 --> 00:22:03,390
Check it out Thursday.
366
00:22:03,456 --> 00:22:06,559
How do you do it?
Mutual respect.
367
00:22:06,626 --> 00:22:09,295
Hey, who's
the nightingale?
368
00:22:09,362 --> 00:22:10,763
Some dame.
369
00:22:10,830 --> 00:22:13,299
She flew in
from Pittsburgh.
370
00:22:13,366 --> 00:22:14,601
Say, kid.
371
00:22:14,667 --> 00:22:17,236
What do they call you?
372
00:22:17,303 --> 00:22:19,171
Impressive.
373
00:22:19,238 --> 00:22:21,708
Her name
is Lil Sheridan.
374
00:22:21,774 --> 00:22:23,075
Thanks.
375
00:22:25,011 --> 00:22:27,447
Lil Sheridan, huh?
376
00:22:27,514 --> 00:22:30,750
My name's Dangerously,
Johnny Dangerously.
377
00:22:30,817 --> 00:22:34,421
Do you know your
last name's an adverb?
378
00:22:34,487 --> 00:22:36,823
Hey, I like that.
379
00:22:36,889 --> 00:22:40,326
You got spirit,
spunk, fire, verve.
380
00:22:40,393 --> 00:22:42,361
You got those.
381
00:22:42,429 --> 00:22:45,398
I like those on a woman.
382
00:22:45,465 --> 00:22:48,367
Gee. My heart's
all a-flutter.
383
00:22:48,435 --> 00:22:50,403
I'll tell you what.
384
00:22:50,470 --> 00:22:53,372
Why don't you
take my card?
385
00:22:53,440 --> 00:22:55,074
Enjoying yourself?
386
00:22:55,141 --> 00:22:57,076
You call me tomorrow.
387
00:22:57,143 --> 00:23:01,914
Don't be upset
when you don't hear
the phone ringing.
388
00:23:01,981 --> 00:23:03,382
Suit yourself.
389
00:23:03,450 --> 00:23:06,352
I hope this is
helping your morale.
390
00:23:06,419 --> 00:23:08,387
That's the first time...
391
00:23:08,455 --> 00:23:11,323
I had to
take that card back.
392
00:23:11,390 --> 00:23:13,860
I kind of like it.
393
00:23:23,002 --> 00:23:24,871
I'll be seeing you.
394
00:23:30,242 --> 00:23:34,346
Does the word "smitten"
mean anything to anybody?
395
00:23:34,413 --> 00:23:35,948
Hey, Johnny.
396
00:23:36,015 --> 00:23:37,349
Hiya, Johnny.
397
00:23:37,416 --> 00:23:38,818
Hiya, Vito.
398
00:23:38,885 --> 00:23:41,688
Better cut down
on that pasta, pal.
399
00:23:41,754 --> 00:23:45,257
I'm starting
the Cambridge diet
on Monday.
400
00:23:45,324 --> 00:23:47,660
Why are you so happy?
401
00:23:47,727 --> 00:23:50,963
I just met an angel.
An absolute angel.
402
00:23:51,030 --> 00:23:52,999
You met Lil, huh?
403
00:23:53,065 --> 00:23:54,967
Sure did, Mr. Dundee.
404
00:23:55,034 --> 00:23:56,869
You see this card?
405
00:23:56,936 --> 00:24:00,006
This card
has been to paradise.
406
00:24:00,072 --> 00:24:01,641
Johnny's in love.
407
00:24:01,708 --> 00:24:05,444
You remind me of
me and the wife
20 years ago.
408
00:24:05,512 --> 00:24:08,815
Of course, Mae never
looked like Lil.
409
00:24:08,881 --> 00:24:11,484
Now she
looks like him.
410
00:24:12,685 --> 00:24:15,722
But what am I,
a beauty?
411
00:24:15,788 --> 00:24:19,325
Dames are put on
this Earth to weaken us,
drain our energy,
412
00:24:19,391 --> 00:24:21,961
laugh at us
when they see us naked.
413
00:24:22,028 --> 00:24:25,665
Johnny, meet two new
members of the gang,
414
00:24:25,732 --> 00:24:27,900
Danny Vermin
and Dutch.
415
00:24:27,967 --> 00:24:29,268
Hello, Johnny.
416
00:24:29,335 --> 00:24:31,170
Hiya, Danny.
417
00:24:31,237 --> 00:24:34,140
Danny and I
used to fight.
418
00:24:34,206 --> 00:24:36,308
What happened to you?
419
00:24:36,375 --> 00:24:39,211
I fulfilled
a lot of predictions.
420
00:24:39,278 --> 00:24:41,280
I've become a scumbag.
421
00:24:41,347 --> 00:24:42,849
Good, Danny.
422
00:24:42,915 --> 00:24:46,653
Many people
never realize what
they want to be.
423
00:24:46,719 --> 00:24:48,788
[ Knock On Door ]
424
00:24:53,826 --> 00:24:56,763
Delivery
for Jocko Dundee.
425
00:24:56,829 --> 00:24:58,765
There's
some postage due,
426
00:24:58,831 --> 00:25:01,901
but I'll
take care of it.
427
00:25:01,968 --> 00:25:04,436
No problem.
428
00:25:04,503 --> 00:25:06,973
What's this?
429
00:25:18,384 --> 00:25:20,152
He sent a robot.
430
00:25:20,219 --> 00:25:24,190
"Dear bastiges,
I hope I got some of you.
431
00:25:24,256 --> 00:25:29,328
"If not, I'll get you
when I take over the Club 25.
432
00:25:29,395 --> 00:25:31,197
Love and kisses,
Roman Moronie."
433
00:25:31,263 --> 00:25:32,732
We got to stop him.
434
00:25:32,799 --> 00:25:35,935
I got something
to stop him.
435
00:25:36,002 --> 00:25:39,205
They made it
for him special.
436
00:25:39,271 --> 00:25:41,741
It's an .88 magnum.
437
00:25:41,808 --> 00:25:44,944
It shoots
through schools.
438
00:25:45,011 --> 00:25:49,315
Vermin, you got too much
sugar in your diet.
439
00:25:49,381 --> 00:25:51,350
Put the gun away.
440
00:25:51,417 --> 00:25:54,721
Maybe I will
and maybe I won't.
441
00:25:54,787 --> 00:25:56,756
Stash the rod, Danny.
442
00:25:56,823 --> 00:25:59,358
You shouldn't
grab me, Johnny.
443
00:25:59,425 --> 00:26:01,861
My mother
grabbed me once.
444
00:26:01,928 --> 00:26:03,429
Once.
445
00:26:03,495 --> 00:26:05,297
What will you do, Johnny?
446
00:26:05,364 --> 00:26:07,166
I'll think of something.
447
00:26:07,233 --> 00:26:11,303
Something clever.
Something unexpected.
448
00:26:11,370 --> 00:26:13,773
Something subtle.
449
00:26:22,048 --> 00:26:24,984
This club
is too fargin small.
450
00:26:25,051 --> 00:26:27,920
How big was the crowd
last night?
451
00:26:27,987 --> 00:26:30,056
Packed. We had to
turn them away.
452
00:26:30,122 --> 00:26:34,193
That's what I mean.
We got to expand
this fargin place.
453
00:26:36,295 --> 00:26:39,331
Knock down that wall,
knock down that wall,
454
00:26:39,398 --> 00:26:41,600
and knock down
that fargin wall.
455
00:26:43,770 --> 00:26:45,672
Now I'm really angry!
456
00:26:45,738 --> 00:26:48,607
This is fargin war!
457
00:27:00,753 --> 00:27:02,689
You must be Tommy.
458
00:27:02,755 --> 00:27:05,725
Uh...
Come in.
459
00:27:05,792 --> 00:27:07,827
Johnny's
expecting you.
460
00:27:09,729 --> 00:27:11,230
Follow me.
461
00:27:14,233 --> 00:27:15,702
Hello, Tommy.
462
00:27:18,337 --> 00:27:19,706
Oh!
463
00:27:19,772 --> 00:27:21,207
Tommy, hey.
464
00:27:21,273 --> 00:27:24,844
Have a seat there,
you little muskrat.
465
00:27:26,746 --> 00:27:29,015
So, Tom...
466
00:27:29,081 --> 00:27:31,951
what's this bull fertilizer
about you quitting law school?
467
00:27:32,018 --> 00:27:35,321
I haven't got
the tits for it.
468
00:27:35,387 --> 00:27:37,223
I mean, the heart.
469
00:27:37,289 --> 00:27:41,327
Tommy, I want you
to pay attention.
470
00:27:41,393 --> 00:27:44,663
I don't understand.
You're tops in your class.
471
00:27:44,731 --> 00:27:47,900
You made the Law Review.
Why get married now?
472
00:27:47,967 --> 00:27:51,838
Because if I don't
get laid, I'll die.
473
00:27:51,904 --> 00:27:54,807
Laid! That's what
this thing's about?
474
00:27:54,874 --> 00:27:57,676
I thought
it was something serious.
475
00:27:57,744 --> 00:27:59,712
It is serious.
476
00:27:59,779 --> 00:28:02,782
I've tried
going to bad girls,
477
00:28:02,849 --> 00:28:05,417
but I'm
too clean-cut.
478
00:28:05,484 --> 00:28:09,756
How do you get laid
in 1930?
479
00:28:09,822 --> 00:28:12,825
Do you think
this is fun?
480
00:28:12,892 --> 00:28:16,362
Do you think
this is a picnic?
481
00:28:16,428 --> 00:28:18,798
This is a bad habit.
482
00:28:18,865 --> 00:28:20,800
It's like drinking coffee.
483
00:28:20,867 --> 00:28:23,770
If I could quit,
I would.
484
00:28:23,836 --> 00:28:25,805
Come in here, Tom.
485
00:28:25,872 --> 00:28:28,908
I want to talk to you.
486
00:28:32,178 --> 00:28:35,247
This is the most
important reason...
487
00:28:35,314 --> 00:28:37,083
why you should wait.
488
00:28:37,149 --> 00:28:40,152
I want to show you something,
489
00:28:40,219 --> 00:28:44,190
something I think
just might open your eyes.
490
00:28:48,795 --> 00:28:53,866
** [ Fanfare ]
491
00:28:53,933 --> 00:28:56,335
Your testicles and you.
492
00:28:57,904 --> 00:28:59,872
Take a good look.
493
00:28:59,939 --> 00:29:02,341
These are
the unlucky ones.
494
00:29:02,408 --> 00:29:07,847
These unfortunate souls
are suffering from E.S.S.--
495
00:29:07,914 --> 00:29:10,716
enlarged scrotum syndrome.
496
00:29:10,783 --> 00:29:13,786
For these poor devils,
it's too late.
497
00:29:13,853 --> 00:29:16,322
But there is hope.
498
00:29:16,388 --> 00:29:18,958
Here, at the Atlanta
Genital Institute,
499
00:29:19,025 --> 00:29:22,328
doctors are at work
around the clock...
500
00:29:22,394 --> 00:29:24,596
to cure this
dreaded affliction.
501
00:29:24,663 --> 00:29:27,934
Hi. I'm Dr. Zillman,
502
00:29:28,000 --> 00:29:32,939
and I'd like to talk to you
about your testes.
503
00:29:33,005 --> 00:29:35,942
The human testicle
is not unlike a balloon.
504
00:29:36,008 --> 00:29:39,979
Sometimes it is empty,
and sometimes...
505
00:29:41,247 --> 00:29:43,182
it is full.
506
00:29:43,249 --> 00:29:44,984
And sometimes,
507
00:29:45,051 --> 00:29:47,186
it can explode.
508
00:29:47,253 --> 00:29:49,889
This may help you understand.
509
00:29:49,956 --> 00:29:53,092
Just remember
that your testicles,
510
00:29:53,159 --> 00:29:55,995
when treated
with love and care,
511
00:29:56,062 --> 00:29:59,999
will give you years
of maintenance-free service.
512
00:30:02,835 --> 00:30:06,005
But if abused, well...
513
00:30:07,974 --> 00:30:10,009
the inevitable conclusion.
514
00:30:11,277 --> 00:30:15,014
So next time,
do the smart thing.
515
00:30:15,081 --> 00:30:19,451
Don't let anything come between
your testicles and you.
516
00:30:19,518 --> 00:30:21,053
Thank you.
517
00:30:26,558 --> 00:30:28,494
Where are you going?
518
00:30:28,560 --> 00:30:30,429
Back to law school.
519
00:30:33,165 --> 00:30:36,035
** [ Band Music ]
520
00:30:43,042 --> 00:30:45,945
Let's hear it
for the band.
521
00:30:46,012 --> 00:30:48,180
Johnny, great to see you.
522
00:30:48,247 --> 00:30:51,217
I got an announcement
to make.
523
00:30:51,283 --> 00:30:54,686
When I die,
hopefully in my bed...
524
00:30:54,753 --> 00:30:57,056
[ Laughter ]
525
00:30:57,123 --> 00:31:01,961
I want to go knowing
that the Jocko Dundee mob...
526
00:31:02,028 --> 00:31:04,496
will continue
with the traditions,
527
00:31:04,563 --> 00:31:06,365
with the high standards,
528
00:31:06,432 --> 00:31:10,869
that made us
the New York Yankees of crime.
529
00:31:10,937 --> 00:31:12,871
[ Applause ]
530
00:31:12,939 --> 00:31:14,941
For that reason,
531
00:31:15,007 --> 00:31:18,877
I'm naming
as my successor...
532
00:31:18,945 --> 00:31:20,879
Johnny Dangerously.
533
00:31:20,947 --> 00:31:23,749
[ Applause ]
534
00:31:23,815 --> 00:31:27,386
I want you
to give a warm welcome...
535
00:31:27,453 --> 00:31:30,522
to a shy,
retiring little lady...
536
00:31:30,589 --> 00:31:32,391
who's come to us...
537
00:31:32,458 --> 00:31:35,027
from a convent school
in Pittsburgh,
538
00:31:35,094 --> 00:31:37,229
Lil Sheridan.
539
00:31:50,009 --> 00:31:53,379
* Over my undies
trimmed in lace *
540
00:31:53,445 --> 00:31:57,216
* I slip on
my black silk disgrace *
541
00:31:57,283 --> 00:32:00,987
* Cut so low,
they'll raid the place *
542
00:32:01,053 --> 00:32:03,956
* I wanna dress dangerously *
543
00:32:04,023 --> 00:32:06,325
Yeah!
* I need to be reckless *
544
00:32:06,392 --> 00:32:08,460
* I need to be daring *
545
00:32:08,527 --> 00:32:12,064
* I need to take chances
and tempt my fate *
546
00:32:12,131 --> 00:32:14,100
* I need to be foolish *
547
00:32:14,166 --> 00:32:15,767
* Need to be crazy *
548
00:32:15,834 --> 00:32:19,205
* Before it's too late
and I'm out of date *
549
00:32:25,844 --> 00:32:30,916
* I'll feed you sizzling steak
and bootleg gin *
550
00:32:30,983 --> 00:32:34,420
* And chocolate cake
till it's a sin *
551
00:32:34,486 --> 00:32:37,889
* We'll work it off
and keep you thin *
552
00:32:37,956 --> 00:32:41,493
* I wanna eat dangerously *
553
00:32:41,560 --> 00:32:43,229
Woo!
554
00:32:43,295 --> 00:32:46,165
* Sizzlin', Sss *
555
00:32:47,499 --> 00:32:48,567
* Cheers *
556
00:32:53,672 --> 00:32:55,541
* I wanna *
557
00:32:55,607 --> 00:32:57,143
* Dangerously *
558
00:32:57,209 --> 00:32:59,178
* I need to be reckless *
559
00:32:59,245 --> 00:33:01,147
* I need to be daring *
560
00:33:01,213 --> 00:33:04,950
* I need to take chances
and tempt my fate *
561
00:33:05,017 --> 00:33:06,818
* I need to be foolish *
562
00:33:06,885 --> 00:33:08,620
* Need to be crazy *
563
00:33:08,687 --> 00:33:12,591
* Before it's too late
and I'm out of date *
564
00:33:15,961 --> 00:33:20,066
* I'm just a slave
to my desire *
565
00:33:20,132 --> 00:33:24,270
* And not afraid
to play with fire *
566
00:33:24,336 --> 00:33:28,307
* I'll fan your flame
and get it higher *
567
00:33:28,374 --> 00:33:31,877
* I wanna live dangerously *
568
00:33:31,943 --> 00:33:34,513
* I wanna eat *
569
00:33:34,580 --> 00:33:36,115
* Dangerously *
570
00:33:36,182 --> 00:33:38,684
* I wanna love *
571
00:33:44,223 --> 00:33:49,795
* Dangerously **
572
00:34:02,074 --> 00:34:04,009
There's Johnny.
573
00:34:04,076 --> 00:34:06,512
Oh, he's so cute!
574
00:34:16,722 --> 00:34:18,490
You're holding up traffic.
575
00:34:18,557 --> 00:34:21,660
I figure
that song you sang...
576
00:34:21,727 --> 00:34:24,029
gave me
the green light.
577
00:34:24,096 --> 00:34:26,064
You're off red,
578
00:34:26,132 --> 00:34:28,500
but you're
still on amber.
579
00:34:28,567 --> 00:34:31,670
I hope that light
changes soon...
580
00:34:31,737 --> 00:34:33,505
because my motor's running.
581
00:34:33,572 --> 00:34:36,074
Be careful
you don't overheat.
582
00:34:36,142 --> 00:34:38,610
I'll tell you one thing.
583
00:34:38,677 --> 00:34:40,045
What's that?
584
00:34:40,112 --> 00:34:41,947
You sure can banter.
585
00:34:42,013 --> 00:34:46,985
Then I decided
to leave Pittsburgh
and come here to Chicago.
586
00:34:47,052 --> 00:34:49,655
Uh, Lil?
Yeah?
587
00:34:49,721 --> 00:34:53,959
This ain't Chicago.
We're in New York.
588
00:34:54,025 --> 00:34:56,094
You're kidding.
589
00:34:57,095 --> 00:34:59,064
Well, New York,
Chicago...
590
00:34:59,131 --> 00:35:04,102
to a girl on her own,
it's all the same.
591
00:35:05,937 --> 00:35:08,574
I figured mom and dad...
592
00:35:08,640 --> 00:35:11,042
didn't need me
around anymore,
593
00:35:11,109 --> 00:35:13,011
not with
14 mouths to feed.
594
00:35:13,078 --> 00:35:15,581
Your folks had 14 kids?
595
00:35:15,647 --> 00:35:18,617
They ran a kennel.
596
00:35:18,684 --> 00:35:20,452
What about your folks?
597
00:35:20,519 --> 00:35:22,921
My mother
raised us herself.
598
00:35:22,988 --> 00:35:26,325
I never knew
my father or uncle.
599
00:35:26,392 --> 00:35:29,261
I kind of knew
my grandmother.
600
00:35:29,328 --> 00:35:31,330
Didn't know
my grandfather.
601
00:35:31,397 --> 00:35:34,466
Never knew
any of my cousins.
602
00:35:34,533 --> 00:35:36,001
Any pets?
603
00:35:36,067 --> 00:35:38,069
We had a dog.
604
00:35:38,136 --> 00:35:40,038
He ran away
when I was a kid.
605
00:35:40,105 --> 00:35:42,274
Never knew him.
606
00:35:49,114 --> 00:35:51,817
Where the hell are we?
607
00:35:55,587 --> 00:35:59,057
Johnny, I'm falling
in a big way.
608
00:35:59,124 --> 00:36:01,059
You got company, kid.
609
00:36:01,126 --> 00:36:03,128
Where will we land?
610
00:36:03,195 --> 00:36:06,532
When we do,
will our hearts break?
611
00:36:06,598 --> 00:36:09,635
There are answers
to these questions,
612
00:36:09,701 --> 00:36:11,169
but first...
613
00:36:25,217 --> 00:36:27,586
Sounds like
Johnny's getting laid.
614
00:36:30,689 --> 00:36:33,124
Moronie was still
on the warpath.
615
00:36:33,191 --> 00:36:35,461
Even getting to work
was an adventure.
616
00:36:36,728 --> 00:36:38,630
Be careful.
617
00:36:38,697 --> 00:36:42,501
There's not
a bullet out there
with my name on it.
618
00:36:45,671 --> 00:36:49,675
I couldn't stand it
if something
happened to you.
619
00:36:49,741 --> 00:36:51,610
Neither could I.
620
00:37:10,796 --> 00:37:12,731
One hippopotamus,
621
00:37:12,798 --> 00:37:14,132
two hippopotamus,
622
00:37:14,199 --> 00:37:15,667
three hippopotamus.
623
00:37:15,734 --> 00:37:16,835
Go!
624
00:37:16,902 --> 00:37:18,970
[ Gunfire ]
625
00:37:38,123 --> 00:37:39,558
Wait!
626
00:37:39,625 --> 00:37:41,527
Get him.
627
00:37:49,067 --> 00:37:50,469
Morning, Johnny.
628
00:37:50,536 --> 00:37:52,538
How's your precious mother?
629
00:37:56,342 --> 00:37:58,043
Hee hee!
630
00:38:02,548 --> 00:38:05,417
Whew. You been
out there today?
631
00:38:05,484 --> 00:38:07,085
Pretty rough?
632
00:38:07,152 --> 00:38:09,521
Not as bad
as yesterday.
633
00:38:09,588 --> 00:38:12,123
You'll feel better
if you have a cookie.
634
00:38:12,190 --> 00:38:13,459
Thanks.
635
00:38:13,525 --> 00:38:15,627
All fixed, Mr. Dundee.
636
00:38:15,694 --> 00:38:17,028
Thanks, pal.
637
00:38:17,095 --> 00:38:19,030
Who's that guy?
638
00:38:19,097 --> 00:38:20,499
The plumber.
639
00:38:20,566 --> 00:38:23,001
My bathroom drain
was stuck.
640
00:38:23,068 --> 00:38:27,439
Where's all this
gangland warfare
getting us, anyway?
641
00:38:27,506 --> 00:38:29,575
I want Moronie,
642
00:38:29,641 --> 00:38:34,580
and I'm not
going to rest
until I get him.
643
00:38:35,547 --> 00:38:38,517
Or until he gets you.
644
00:38:38,584 --> 00:38:42,020
Hey, hey,
hey, hey, hey!
645
00:38:42,087 --> 00:38:43,489
Ow.
646
00:38:43,555 --> 00:38:45,657
Relax, Johnny.
Relax.
647
00:38:45,724 --> 00:38:47,058
Come on.
648
00:38:47,125 --> 00:38:48,994
Heh heh heh!
649
00:38:49,060 --> 00:38:52,364
A year from now,
we'll look back
on all this...
650
00:38:52,431 --> 00:38:56,668
and we're gonna have
one big laugh.
651
00:38:56,735 --> 00:38:58,537
Oh, boy.
652
00:38:58,604 --> 00:39:01,507
I really
had to wee-wee.
653
00:39:01,573 --> 00:39:03,008
That's funny.
654
00:39:03,074 --> 00:39:07,012
This bathroom drain
was never stuck before.
655
00:39:10,148 --> 00:39:11,950
Mr. Dundee!
656
00:39:12,017 --> 00:39:13,084
Wait!
657
00:39:18,089 --> 00:39:22,694
Have you got the number
of that other plumber?
658
00:39:22,761 --> 00:39:24,129
Mr. Dundee--
659
00:39:24,195 --> 00:39:26,197
Aah! Oh, my God!
660
00:39:26,264 --> 00:39:29,535
Moronie, what have
you done to me?
661
00:39:29,601 --> 00:39:31,537
Now look, calm down.
662
00:39:31,603 --> 00:39:33,705
Why go on living?
663
00:39:33,772 --> 00:39:35,106
Don't panic.
664
00:39:35,173 --> 00:39:36,575
Calm down?
665
00:39:36,642 --> 00:39:40,178
I have my dork
in my hand!
666
00:39:40,245 --> 00:39:42,714
It's not your dork.
Look.
667
00:39:42,781 --> 00:39:44,182
Thank God.
668
00:39:44,249 --> 00:39:46,685
It's just
the chain handle.
669
00:39:46,752 --> 00:39:47,753
Sure.
670
00:39:47,819 --> 00:39:49,788
Freddy,
you're still here,
671
00:39:49,855 --> 00:39:52,157
you little
baldheaded beauty.
672
00:39:52,223 --> 00:39:54,626
I thought I lost you.
673
00:39:54,693 --> 00:39:58,129
Johnny, this is
a sign from above.
674
00:39:58,196 --> 00:40:00,131
You okay, boss?
675
00:40:00,198 --> 00:40:01,332
Johnny,
676
00:40:01,399 --> 00:40:04,169
I'm retiring before
it's too late.
677
00:40:04,235 --> 00:40:06,237
You remember this?
678
00:40:06,304 --> 00:40:09,007
Take it.
You're the boss now.
679
00:40:09,074 --> 00:40:10,542
Oh, no.
680
00:40:10,609 --> 00:40:13,512
I'm not ready
for the responsibility.
681
00:40:13,579 --> 00:40:16,748
I'm ready.
Forget it, Vermin.
682
00:40:30,996 --> 00:40:32,764
I was on top.
683
00:40:32,831 --> 00:40:34,800
Moronie and I had a truce.
684
00:40:34,866 --> 00:40:37,503
Lil and I
were going strong.
685
00:40:37,569 --> 00:40:41,640
And Ma, between occasional
transplants and bypasses,
686
00:40:41,707 --> 00:40:44,543
her health was improving.
687
00:40:44,610 --> 00:40:48,146
I was on top
of the world.
688
00:40:48,213 --> 00:40:49,948
Great story, pops.
So long.
689
00:40:50,015 --> 00:40:53,585
Wait. I'm getting
to the sad part.
690
00:40:53,652 --> 00:40:57,589
Everything else in my life
was going so well.
691
00:40:57,656 --> 00:41:01,627
I was about to face
my greatest challenge.
692
00:41:10,235 --> 00:41:13,104
Tommy, we're
so proud of you.
693
00:41:13,171 --> 00:41:15,173
We sure are, kid.
694
00:41:15,240 --> 00:41:18,544
I owe it all
to you, Johnny.
695
00:41:18,610 --> 00:41:21,179
This calls
for a picture.
696
00:41:21,246 --> 00:41:23,549
Wait. I'll get
me camera.
697
00:41:23,615 --> 00:41:25,316
Hold this.
698
00:41:25,383 --> 00:41:28,053
Where the hell
is that camera?
699
00:41:34,726 --> 00:41:37,929
Tommy, I want you
to have something.
700
00:41:37,996 --> 00:41:39,898
"Kimball, Pritchert,
and Williston?"
701
00:41:39,965 --> 00:41:42,968
Biggest law firm
in the city.
702
00:41:43,034 --> 00:41:46,437
Call them.
You'll find them
receptive.
703
00:41:46,504 --> 00:41:49,407
Thanks, Johnny,
but I've already decided.
704
00:41:49,474 --> 00:41:51,910
You'll be proud of me.
705
00:41:51,977 --> 00:41:54,846
I'm joining
the District Attorney's office.
706
00:41:54,913 --> 00:41:58,149
Johnny, I'm going to
dedicate my life...
707
00:41:58,216 --> 00:42:00,151
to fighting crime.
708
00:42:00,218 --> 00:42:02,087
Isn't that great?
709
00:42:02,153 --> 00:42:06,157
My brother, who I put
through law school,
710
00:42:06,224 --> 00:42:08,126
is gonna be fighting--
711
00:42:08,193 --> 00:42:10,228
Crime.
crime.
712
00:42:14,232 --> 00:42:16,001
Mom, it's prohibition.
713
00:42:16,067 --> 00:42:19,504
Stop acting like
a fag choir boy.
714
00:42:19,571 --> 00:42:21,206
Here.
715
00:42:21,272 --> 00:42:23,609
To me two
darling sons,
716
00:42:23,675 --> 00:42:26,211
one a famous
nightclub owner,
717
00:42:26,277 --> 00:42:28,013
the other
a crime fighter.
718
00:42:28,079 --> 00:42:31,016
With a father
like Killer Kelly,
719
00:42:31,082 --> 00:42:34,019
it's a miracle
neither of you...
720
00:42:34,085 --> 00:42:36,922
became a piece-of-shit
criminal.
721
00:42:36,988 --> 00:42:39,658
Maybe she was right.
I decided to go legit.
722
00:42:39,725 --> 00:42:43,695
Then I got more bad news
about mom.
723
00:42:43,762 --> 00:42:45,764
About your mom, John.
What is it?
How much?
724
00:42:45,831 --> 00:42:49,567
A blocked salivary
gland--$7,500.
725
00:42:49,635 --> 00:42:51,069
Go ahead.
726
00:42:51,136 --> 00:42:54,439
It'll be good
seeing her spit again.
727
00:42:54,505 --> 00:42:56,407
I returned to crime.
728
00:42:56,474 --> 00:43:00,411
Since I had
the district attorney
on our payroll,
729
00:43:00,478 --> 00:43:02,313
I wasn't worried
about Tommy.
730
00:43:04,282 --> 00:43:06,685
I'm the new Assistant D.A.
731
00:43:06,752 --> 00:43:10,588
I'm ready to join
the war against crime.
732
00:43:10,656 --> 00:43:12,590
The boss in?
733
00:43:12,658 --> 00:43:14,125
In there.
734
00:43:16,862 --> 00:43:19,530
Hi. Tommy Kelly
reporting for work, sir.
735
00:43:19,597 --> 00:43:21,432
Welcome to the team.
736
00:43:21,499 --> 00:43:26,972
I'm proud to be on any team
whose adversary is crime.
737
00:43:27,038 --> 00:43:30,441
That's just what
I wanted to hear.
738
00:43:30,508 --> 00:43:34,980
That's why
we scout law schools
for young idealists.
739
00:43:35,046 --> 00:43:38,549
But why not ease
into the job?
740
00:43:38,616 --> 00:43:40,585
Take a little vacation.
741
00:43:40,652 --> 00:43:43,588
A vacation?
But what about crime?
742
00:43:43,655 --> 00:43:47,158
It'll be here
when you get back.
743
00:43:47,225 --> 00:43:48,960
That's the trouble.
744
00:43:49,027 --> 00:43:51,596
Crime will always be here...
745
00:43:51,663 --> 00:43:54,532
unless something
is done about it.
746
00:43:54,599 --> 00:43:57,635
But Tommy didn't go
on vacation.
747
00:43:57,703 --> 00:43:59,871
He became
a tireless crime fighter.
748
00:43:59,938 --> 00:44:02,908
He fought crime
in the newspapers.
749
00:44:02,974 --> 00:44:06,511
He attacked it
on the radio.
750
00:44:06,577 --> 00:44:08,980
He arrested
every criminal in town.
751
00:44:09,047 --> 00:44:13,551
Then he turned his sights
on my enemy, Moronie.
752
00:44:13,618 --> 00:44:18,724
That Roman Troy Moronie
is responsible for
the Mother's Day massacre,
753
00:44:18,790 --> 00:44:20,692
the Christmas Day slaughter,
754
00:44:20,759 --> 00:44:23,862
the Lincoln's Birthday
mutilation,
755
00:44:23,929 --> 00:44:26,832
and the Groundhog's Day
beheadings.
756
00:44:26,898 --> 00:44:31,102
My client wants to read
a prepared statement.
757
00:44:31,169 --> 00:44:32,470
Go ahead.
758
00:44:32,537 --> 00:44:35,040
I would like to direct this...
759
00:44:35,106 --> 00:44:39,610
to the distinguished
members of the panel.
760
00:44:39,677 --> 00:44:41,679
"You lousy corksuckers.
761
00:44:41,747 --> 00:44:45,183
"You have violated
my fargin rights.
762
00:44:45,250 --> 00:44:48,053
"This sum un om
botching country...
763
00:44:48,119 --> 00:44:52,023
"was founded so
that the liberties...
764
00:44:52,090 --> 00:44:54,960
"of common patriotic
citizens like me...
765
00:44:55,026 --> 00:44:57,595
"could not be taken away...
766
00:44:57,662 --> 00:45:00,131
"by a bunch
of fargin iceholes...
767
00:45:00,198 --> 00:45:01,933
like yourselves."
768
00:45:02,000 --> 00:45:04,169
Thank you very much.
769
00:45:04,235 --> 00:45:06,071
[ Crowd Gasps ]
770
00:45:06,137 --> 00:45:08,439
What do you know about
Benny the Hump,
771
00:45:08,506 --> 00:45:12,210
Roland Carpiti,
and Izzy the Nose
mean to you?
772
00:45:12,277 --> 00:45:13,845
Don't mean a thing.
773
00:45:13,912 --> 00:45:16,281
Recognize this?
774
00:45:16,347 --> 00:45:17,648
No.
775
00:45:17,715 --> 00:45:20,618
Your fingerprints
are on this gun,
776
00:45:20,685 --> 00:45:23,621
which was used
to kill everyone...
777
00:45:23,688 --> 00:45:25,957
in a building
at 110 East 40th Street.
778
00:45:26,024 --> 00:45:28,393
Where do you
get that?
779
00:45:28,459 --> 00:45:31,729
If a train left New York
at 300 miles per hour,
780
00:45:31,797 --> 00:45:34,900
accelerated speed
15 miles per hour,
781
00:45:34,966 --> 00:45:38,937
and traveled
a distance of 683 miles,
782
00:45:39,004 --> 00:45:42,107
what time would that train
reach Chicago?
783
00:45:42,173 --> 00:45:44,776
That's a fargin
silly question!
784
00:45:44,843 --> 00:45:48,113
When, sir?
When would that train
reach Chicago?
785
00:45:51,416 --> 00:45:56,021
This...this weed of crime
that threatens to grow
unchecked...
786
00:45:56,087 --> 00:45:59,024
and choke off
this beautiful flower...
787
00:45:59,090 --> 00:46:02,060
which is our free,
democratic society--
788
00:46:02,127 --> 00:46:06,464
I never thought
this radio stunt
would catch on.
789
00:46:06,531 --> 00:46:11,436
The public sees him
as a knight in shining armor.
790
00:46:11,502 --> 00:46:15,040
This goes through armor,
through the victim,
791
00:46:15,106 --> 00:46:18,609
through the wall,
through a tree outside--
792
00:46:18,676 --> 00:46:21,646
Relax. Kelly has
nothing on us.
793
00:46:21,712 --> 00:46:25,650
Maybe we should wait
till he does, huh?
794
00:46:25,716 --> 00:46:28,686
We kill Kelly
and we'll have trouble.
795
00:46:28,753 --> 00:46:32,891
If Jocko was in charge,
Kelly would have cement loafers.
796
00:46:32,958 --> 00:46:35,393
I'm in charge,
not Jocko.
797
00:46:35,460 --> 00:46:37,628
Got it?
798
00:46:37,695 --> 00:46:40,065
Talk sense to the kid.
799
00:46:40,131 --> 00:46:42,733
Get him to play ball.
800
00:46:42,800 --> 00:46:46,171
We'll appeal to his
more practical side.
801
00:46:46,237 --> 00:46:50,675
While you're at it,
buy yourself a second home.
802
00:46:50,741 --> 00:46:52,243
Thanks, Johnny.
803
00:46:52,310 --> 00:46:53,578
Sure.
804
00:46:55,780 --> 00:46:57,715
This gang's getting soft.
805
00:46:57,782 --> 00:47:00,785
By letting Kelly
take us apart,
806
00:47:00,852 --> 00:47:03,788
we've become laughingstocks
of the underworld.
807
00:47:03,855 --> 00:47:06,491
I'm embarrassed
to tell people what I do.
808
00:47:06,557 --> 00:47:10,161
I say I'm a barber.
I told somebody
I was a male nurse.
809
00:47:10,228 --> 00:47:13,298
I'm ashamed to admit
I'm a criminal.
810
00:47:13,364 --> 00:47:16,267
We got to do something
about this.
811
00:47:16,334 --> 00:47:18,803
You fellas
really disappoint me.
812
00:47:18,870 --> 00:47:21,639
Look around.
What do you see?
813
00:47:21,706 --> 00:47:24,675
I'll tell you what I see.
814
00:47:24,742 --> 00:47:28,046
I see some guys
doing pretty good.
815
00:47:28,113 --> 00:47:30,648
Manny, you got a sauna?
816
00:47:30,715 --> 00:47:33,218
Yeah,
I got a sauna.
817
00:47:33,284 --> 00:47:34,719
All right.
818
00:47:34,785 --> 00:47:37,655
Ollie, don't you
send your mother...
819
00:47:37,722 --> 00:47:39,624
to Norway every summer?
820
00:47:39,690 --> 00:47:41,092
Yeah, Johnny.
821
00:47:41,159 --> 00:47:44,662
Vito, how many hats
do you own?
822
00:47:44,729 --> 00:47:46,697
Upwards around 180.
823
00:47:46,764 --> 00:47:50,201
180 hats.
That's a lot of hats.
824
00:47:50,268 --> 00:47:51,669
Yeah.
825
00:47:51,736 --> 00:47:54,172
You never
told me that.
826
00:47:54,239 --> 00:47:58,709
Tell me another gang
that's got a dental plan.
827
00:47:58,776 --> 00:48:01,646
You know why
we're so successful?
828
00:48:01,712 --> 00:48:03,081
Why, Johnny?
829
00:48:03,148 --> 00:48:05,116
Because we're diversified.
830
00:48:05,183 --> 00:48:08,353
Diversification,
yes, sir.
831
00:48:08,419 --> 00:48:11,522
We're constantly exploring
new areas of crime.
832
00:48:11,589 --> 00:48:14,692
We better because
there's Japanese gangs...
833
00:48:14,759 --> 00:48:18,063
that will do it
faster and cheaper.
834
00:48:18,129 --> 00:48:20,698
There's so much out there.
835
00:48:20,765 --> 00:48:23,734
You can find
something you like.
836
00:48:23,801 --> 00:48:26,671
I like
what I'm doing now.
837
00:48:26,737 --> 00:48:29,074
I enjoy
giving whores work,
838
00:48:29,140 --> 00:48:31,109
loan sharking,
planting bombs.
839
00:48:31,176 --> 00:48:34,912
These are a few
of my favorite things.
840
00:48:34,980 --> 00:48:36,547
Sick. Dumb-ass.
841
00:48:39,217 --> 00:48:41,252
You missed, fuck face.
842
00:48:43,121 --> 00:48:45,190
All right, Vermin.
843
00:48:45,256 --> 00:48:49,094
You're not
getting that back
till you've matured.
844
00:48:49,160 --> 00:48:51,129
Aren't we touchy,
Johnny?
845
00:48:51,196 --> 00:48:55,300
Something going on
between you and Kelly?
846
00:48:58,136 --> 00:49:01,139
Don't hang me on a hook.
847
00:49:01,206 --> 00:49:03,841
My father hung me
on a hook once.
848
00:49:03,908 --> 00:49:06,277
Once.
849
00:49:08,513 --> 00:49:09,714
[ Crash ]
850
00:49:09,780 --> 00:49:11,782
Come on, boys, I'm buying.
851
00:49:11,849 --> 00:49:13,851
Now you're talking.
852
00:49:13,918 --> 00:49:16,587
Hang in there, Vermin.
853
00:49:16,654 --> 00:49:21,126
There's something fishy
with Johnny and that D.A.
854
00:49:21,192 --> 00:49:24,162
I'm gonna find out
what it is.
855
00:49:39,177 --> 00:49:41,279
[ Doorbell Rings ]
856
00:49:43,181 --> 00:49:48,786
I've got enough evidence
to put Johnny Dangerously
where he belongs.
857
00:49:48,853 --> 00:49:52,690
We don't even know
such a man exists.
858
00:49:52,757 --> 00:49:54,192
Until now.
859
00:49:54,259 --> 00:49:57,228
Sir, I have got
conclusive evidence--
860
00:49:57,295 --> 00:50:00,765
notarized depositions,
tire prints, blood samples.
861
00:50:00,831 --> 00:50:02,633
I've got
eyewitness accounts,
862
00:50:02,700 --> 00:50:05,203
murder weapons,
fingerprints, recordings.
863
00:50:05,270 --> 00:50:07,172
Hold it. Hold it.
Hold it, kid.
864
00:50:07,238 --> 00:50:09,640
It's flimsy.
It's not enough.
865
00:50:09,707 --> 00:50:14,745
It'll never hold up,
not in a court of law.
866
00:50:14,812 --> 00:50:16,614
Let's put this aside.
867
00:50:16,681 --> 00:50:20,251
We're here to socialize,
not talk shop.
868
00:50:24,889 --> 00:50:27,758
Had enough
milk-fed veal, Tommy?
869
00:50:27,825 --> 00:50:29,727
Yes, sir. Thank you.
870
00:50:29,794 --> 00:50:34,365
Can we get back
to this damaging evidence
on Johnny Dangerously?
871
00:50:34,432 --> 00:50:35,833
No.
872
00:50:35,900 --> 00:50:38,736
Tonight,
I want to talk about...
873
00:50:38,803 --> 00:50:42,140
Tommy Kelly
and his future.
874
00:50:42,207 --> 00:50:44,142
You're engaged,
aren't you?
875
00:50:44,209 --> 00:50:47,712
Yes, to a fine
and decent girl.
876
00:50:47,778 --> 00:50:50,081
We plan to marry soon.
877
00:50:50,148 --> 00:50:53,084
As soon as
you can afford it.
878
00:50:53,151 --> 00:50:54,719
We'll manage.
879
00:50:54,785 --> 00:50:57,222
Oh, I'm sure
you will.
880
00:50:58,889 --> 00:51:01,692
But a little help
can't hurt.
881
00:51:03,161 --> 00:51:05,763
Let me show you
something.
882
00:51:05,830 --> 00:51:08,032
[ Honk Honk ]
883
00:51:08,099 --> 00:51:10,067
[ Ding ]
884
00:51:10,135 --> 00:51:12,069
[ Ring-A-Ling ]
885
00:51:12,137 --> 00:51:14,572
It's time to play ball!
886
00:51:14,639 --> 00:51:18,643
Let's see what's in store
for Tommy Kelly...
887
00:51:18,709 --> 00:51:20,711
if he plays ball.
888
00:51:20,778 --> 00:51:22,613
In a hurry, Sally?
889
00:51:22,680 --> 00:51:25,783
Use this time-saving
microflame oven.
890
00:51:25,850 --> 00:51:29,019
Cook a turkey
in under a day.
891
00:51:29,086 --> 00:51:31,922
In a rut, Tom?
Get away!
892
00:51:31,989 --> 00:51:37,128
Take a trip around the world
on us, twice, aboard the...
893
00:51:37,195 --> 00:51:40,698
[ Toot Toot ]
S.S. Kelly.
894
00:51:40,765 --> 00:51:42,567
And when you return,
895
00:51:42,633 --> 00:51:46,103
move into your own
little love nest.
896
00:51:46,171 --> 00:51:48,406
Plenty of extra
closet space.
897
00:51:48,473 --> 00:51:50,908
Perfect for entertaining.
898
00:51:50,975 --> 00:51:54,212
And on those chilly
winter nights,
899
00:51:54,279 --> 00:51:58,149
Sally can wrap herself up
in this number.
900
00:51:58,216 --> 00:52:01,186
And on those
hot summer nights,
901
00:52:01,252 --> 00:52:05,156
Sally can wrap
herself up in ice.
902
00:52:05,223 --> 00:52:08,359
It's all yours,
if you play ball.
903
00:52:10,728 --> 00:52:12,630
What do you say?
904
00:52:14,199 --> 00:52:17,602
I say I'll see you
behind bars.
905
00:52:29,180 --> 00:52:31,182
[ Ring ]
906
00:52:31,249 --> 00:52:32,550
What's up?
907
00:52:32,617 --> 00:52:35,686
He didn't go for it.
What now?
908
00:52:35,753 --> 00:52:37,154
I'll ask Johnny.
909
00:52:37,222 --> 00:52:40,024
Johnny, what will you do
about Kelly?
910
00:52:40,090 --> 00:52:42,360
[ Mimicking Johnny ]
"Kill him."
He says kill him.
911
00:52:42,427 --> 00:52:46,797
I thought he'd feel that way,
so I've taken care of it.
912
00:52:51,035 --> 00:52:53,238
** [ Music ]
913
00:52:55,540 --> 00:52:58,409
* I'm a sentimental sap,
that's all *
914
00:52:58,476 --> 00:53:00,511
* What's the use of trying
not to fall *
915
00:53:00,578 --> 00:53:02,847
* I have no will,
you've made your kill *
916
00:53:02,913 --> 00:53:05,216
* 'Cause you took
advantage of me *
917
00:53:05,283 --> 00:53:06,917
* I'm just like an apple
on a bough *
918
00:53:06,984 --> 00:53:08,486
* And you're going to
shake me down somehow *
919
00:53:08,553 --> 00:53:10,120
* So what's the use
She cooked my goose *
920
00:53:10,187 --> 00:53:11,021
* When she took
advantage of me **
921
00:53:11,088 --> 00:53:13,157
[ Music Plays Faster ]
922
00:53:13,224 --> 00:53:16,794
Oh, my God!
923
00:53:16,861 --> 00:53:18,696
Whoa!
924
00:53:18,763 --> 00:53:20,865
Aahhh!
925
00:53:20,931 --> 00:53:22,867
Oh, my God!
926
00:53:22,933 --> 00:53:24,569
Oh, my God!
927
00:53:29,874 --> 00:53:31,776
Which one's Tommy?
928
00:53:31,842 --> 00:53:33,711
Got me.
929
00:53:33,778 --> 00:53:35,780
Dr. Michael Hertzberg
to surgery.
930
00:53:35,846 --> 00:53:37,248
This is him.
931
00:53:37,315 --> 00:53:39,784
He's got
his father's eyes.
932
00:53:39,850 --> 00:53:41,719
Give me a pen.
933
00:53:42,887 --> 00:53:44,989
In case they move him.
934
00:53:48,326 --> 00:53:51,228
Hey, Ma.
Is he going to--
935
00:53:51,296 --> 00:53:53,197
I mean, will he--
936
00:53:53,264 --> 00:53:55,300
Croak? No.
937
00:53:55,366 --> 00:53:59,236
Dr. Kaplan says he's
going to be fine.
938
00:53:59,304 --> 00:54:01,205
We Kellys are tough.
939
00:54:01,272 --> 00:54:03,308
What happened?
940
00:54:03,374 --> 00:54:06,944
His brakes failed
leaving the D.A.'s.
941
00:54:07,011 --> 00:54:09,013
His brakes?
942
00:54:09,079 --> 00:54:11,549
I smell a rat.
943
00:54:13,117 --> 00:54:15,520
Get yourself a cab, Ma.
944
00:54:15,586 --> 00:54:19,557
I got a little business
to attend to.
945
00:54:21,158 --> 00:54:24,295
Dr. Hugo Carey, emergency.
946
00:54:24,362 --> 00:54:27,665
This is very nice,
although unexpected.
947
00:54:27,732 --> 00:54:33,571
Well, Winston,
you been on the take
from us all these years.
948
00:54:33,638 --> 00:54:36,507
Just my way
of saying thanks.
949
00:54:36,574 --> 00:54:38,843
That's real generous.
950
00:54:38,909 --> 00:54:40,578
You know...
951
00:54:40,645 --> 00:54:43,180
you've always
seemed to me...
952
00:54:43,247 --> 00:54:47,184
to be more sensitive
than the rest.
953
00:54:47,251 --> 00:54:50,588
We should spend
some time together,
954
00:54:50,655 --> 00:54:54,024
say two weeks
in Puerto Rico.
955
00:54:55,660 --> 00:54:57,595
It's a thought.
It's a thought.
956
00:54:57,662 --> 00:55:00,765
I picked
something up for you.
957
00:55:04,168 --> 00:55:06,637
John...John.
958
00:55:10,207 --> 00:55:12,643
A smoking jacket.
959
00:55:13,778 --> 00:55:15,245
Red.
960
00:55:15,312 --> 00:55:17,114
My favorite color.
961
00:55:17,181 --> 00:55:18,649
Oh.
962
00:55:24,188 --> 00:55:25,590
Mmm! Tasty.
963
00:55:25,656 --> 00:55:28,158
What is this
we're drinking?
964
00:55:28,225 --> 00:55:30,160
Uh...read the label.
965
00:55:30,227 --> 00:55:32,663
I got to make a call.
966
00:55:35,232 --> 00:55:37,067
Malt liquor. Hmm.
967
00:55:39,236 --> 00:55:40,938
[ Galloping ]
968
00:55:44,008 --> 00:55:46,677
Aah!
969
00:55:56,821 --> 00:55:58,088
Yo!
970
00:56:08,232 --> 00:56:10,234
My God.
971
00:56:10,300 --> 00:56:14,439
My God, I can see.
I can see!
972
00:56:39,296 --> 00:56:41,265
Hi, honey. I'm home.
973
00:56:41,331 --> 00:56:43,267
Johnny, you're early.
974
00:56:43,333 --> 00:56:45,970
That's all right,
isn't it?
975
00:56:46,036 --> 00:56:47,472
[ Crash ]
976
00:56:47,538 --> 00:56:51,008
You never missed before.
Is something wrong?
977
00:56:51,075 --> 00:56:52,910
[ Doorbell Rings ]
978
00:56:54,344 --> 00:56:56,013
Oh, hi, Johnny.
979
00:56:56,080 --> 00:56:57,882
Hi, Mrs. Capone.
980
00:56:57,948 --> 00:57:01,018
Could I borrow
a cup of bullets?
981
00:57:01,085 --> 00:57:03,020
We're a little low.
982
00:57:03,087 --> 00:57:04,922
Al will be pissed.
983
00:57:04,989 --> 00:57:07,958
Maybe Al's gonna
have to stay home tonight.
984
00:57:08,025 --> 00:57:09,527
Gee.
985
00:57:09,594 --> 00:57:12,329
You weren't
very nice to her.
986
00:57:12,396 --> 00:57:14,031
Oh, no?
987
00:57:14,098 --> 00:57:18,569
When's somebody
going to be nice
to Johnny Dangerously?
988
00:57:18,636 --> 00:57:22,006
Look. My own brother's
out to get me.
989
00:57:22,072 --> 00:57:25,009
That psycho Vermin's
out to get him.
The gang's getting antsy,
990
00:57:25,075 --> 00:57:28,946
and the Crime Commission
is breathing down my neck.
991
00:57:29,013 --> 00:57:32,550
I hope that's
for a small grownup.
992
00:57:32,617 --> 00:57:35,119
Nah. Just
wishful thinking.
993
00:57:35,185 --> 00:57:37,087
Ah, maybe someday, kid.
994
00:57:37,154 --> 00:57:39,056
When, Johnny?
995
00:57:39,123 --> 00:57:44,629
When are we going
to stop running
and start living?
996
00:57:44,695 --> 00:57:48,132
With Sally and Tommy
getting hitched
tomorrow,
997
00:57:48,198 --> 00:57:50,568
it got me thinking.
998
00:57:50,635 --> 00:57:53,538
I got an
old-fashioned streak.
999
00:57:53,604 --> 00:57:56,006
I want a normal life.
1000
00:57:56,073 --> 00:57:59,544
Johnny Dangerously
can't live a normal life.
1001
00:57:59,610 --> 00:58:02,012
It ain't in the cards.
1002
00:58:02,079 --> 00:58:05,650
People like me,
we're like shooting stars.
1003
00:58:05,716 --> 00:58:10,020
We cross the sky,
burning hot for one moment,
1004
00:58:10,087 --> 00:58:13,624
and then we plunge
to Earth, disappear.
1005
00:58:13,691 --> 00:58:17,394
Jesus Christ.
I'm starting to upset myself.
1006
00:58:17,461 --> 00:58:21,065
Johnny, it doesn't
have to be that way.
1007
00:58:21,131 --> 00:58:23,100
We can change.
1008
00:58:23,167 --> 00:58:25,069
I don't know, Lil.
1009
00:58:25,135 --> 00:58:27,004
Dare we dream?
1010
00:58:28,138 --> 00:58:29,506
Yeah.
1011
00:58:29,574 --> 00:58:31,508
Hanging curtains,
1012
00:58:31,576 --> 00:58:33,544
ironing shirts.
1013
00:58:33,611 --> 00:58:35,546
Yeah.
Car pools, PTA.
1014
00:58:35,613 --> 00:58:37,514
Sharing
a casserole recipe.
1015
00:58:37,582 --> 00:58:39,550
Putting up shelf paper.
1016
00:58:39,617 --> 00:58:41,986
Johnny,
I love shelf paper.
1017
00:58:42,052 --> 00:58:45,155
A little house,
white picket fence.
1018
00:58:45,222 --> 00:58:47,992
Kids and dogs
in the yard.
1019
00:58:48,058 --> 00:58:51,629
Saying hi to
a neighbor named Fred.
1020
00:58:51,696 --> 00:58:55,733
Maybe there is a rainbow
for us out there.
1021
00:58:55,800 --> 00:58:58,736
Sure, me and Lil had dreams.
1022
00:58:58,803 --> 00:59:01,739
But when you're in crime, kid,
dreams don't always come true.
1023
00:59:08,646 --> 00:59:10,114
Follow him.
1024
00:59:18,322 --> 00:59:21,225
Park it
in this slot here.
1025
00:59:21,291 --> 00:59:23,060
It's for
the handicapped.
1026
00:59:23,127 --> 00:59:26,130
I am handicapped.
I'm psychotic.
1027
00:59:29,634 --> 00:59:32,837
I now pronounce you
man and wife.
1028
00:59:32,903 --> 00:59:35,305
You may kiss the bride.
1029
00:59:41,545 --> 00:59:44,481
You're like
a daughter to me.
1030
00:59:44,548 --> 00:59:47,384
I want to share
something with you.
1031
00:59:47,451 --> 00:59:49,019
What's that?
1032
00:59:49,086 --> 00:59:50,988
I go both ways.
1033
00:59:51,055 --> 00:59:52,923
Oh.
1034
01:00:00,898 --> 01:00:03,000
I'm glad we waited.
1035
01:00:03,067 --> 01:00:03,834
Yes.
1036
01:00:03,901 --> 01:00:06,003
I can't wait anymore.
1037
01:00:06,070 --> 01:00:07,437
Okay, where?
1038
01:00:07,504 --> 01:00:09,339
Some place real close.
1039
01:00:30,227 --> 01:00:34,231
Tommy's excited,
but does he know
about foreplay?
1040
01:00:34,298 --> 01:00:36,200
He'll figure it out.
1041
01:00:36,266 --> 01:00:40,237
When will you follow
your brother's example,
Johnny Kelly?
1042
01:00:40,304 --> 01:00:42,740
Brothers.
Ha ha ha!
1043
01:00:43,741 --> 01:00:46,143
I knew
there was something.
1044
01:00:48,045 --> 01:00:51,015
Oh, leave your face
right there.
1045
01:00:51,849 --> 01:00:53,617
How do you like that?
1046
01:00:53,684 --> 01:00:56,353
Johnny Dangerously
is Tommy Kelly's brother.
1047
01:00:56,420 --> 01:00:58,055
What?
1048
01:00:58,122 --> 01:01:01,025
Dangerously
is the D.A.'s brother.
1049
01:01:01,091 --> 01:01:03,393
Ha ha ha!
1050
01:01:08,565 --> 01:01:11,368
That's it?
You little shit!
1051
01:01:11,435 --> 01:01:14,972
* Say hello to Jesus *
1052
01:01:15,039 --> 01:01:19,543
* Take Mr. Jesus
by the hand **
1053
01:01:19,609 --> 01:01:22,880
Hallelujah!
[ Crash ]
1054
01:01:24,614 --> 01:01:27,718
We were waiting
in the car.
1055
01:01:27,785 --> 01:01:30,855
I wondered what happened
to my brother.
1056
01:01:30,921 --> 01:01:34,258
I'm Johnny Kelly's brother,
not Johnny Dangerously's.
1057
01:01:34,324 --> 01:01:38,963
Just a matter of time,
wasn't it, kid?
1058
01:01:39,029 --> 01:01:41,398
Listen.
Just don't tell Ma.
1059
01:01:41,465 --> 01:01:44,068
When I put you
behind bars,
1060
01:01:44,134 --> 01:01:48,839
your picture will be
in every newspaper
in this country!
1061
01:01:48,906 --> 01:01:51,075
Why, Johnny? Why?
1062
01:01:51,141 --> 01:01:56,580
Maybe it's because
that dealer in the sky
shuffles the cards...
1063
01:01:56,646 --> 01:01:59,984
and we just play
what we're dealt.
1064
01:02:00,050 --> 01:02:02,552
It's against the law
to gamble!
1065
01:02:02,619 --> 01:02:04,121
Christ.
1066
01:02:04,188 --> 01:02:06,556
I took an oath
to fight crime.
1067
01:02:06,623 --> 01:02:08,993
I can't go against
my brother.
1068
01:02:09,059 --> 01:02:11,395
We'll settle this
with our fists.
1069
01:02:11,461 --> 01:02:13,230
Whoa! Wait a minute!
1070
01:02:13,297 --> 01:02:16,633
You can't fight me.
I'm too good.
1071
01:02:16,700 --> 01:02:18,568
I'll take my chances.
1072
01:02:18,635 --> 01:02:20,204
Okay.
1073
01:02:20,270 --> 01:02:22,606
I win, you quit.
1074
01:02:22,672 --> 01:02:25,209
You win, I quit.
1075
01:02:25,275 --> 01:02:26,743
All right.
1076
01:02:34,985 --> 01:02:37,087
Johnny, take a dive.
1077
01:02:39,589 --> 01:02:41,025
Oh!
1078
01:02:45,062 --> 01:02:48,933
I didn't know
you packed such a wallop.
1079
01:02:48,999 --> 01:02:50,901
All right, Tom, you win.
1080
01:02:50,968 --> 01:02:53,003
I'm going legit.
1081
01:02:53,070 --> 01:02:55,906
Gee, thanks, Johnny.
1082
01:02:57,141 --> 01:02:58,408
Hey!
1083
01:02:58,475 --> 01:03:00,444
All right!
1084
01:03:04,448 --> 01:03:06,016
[ Coughing ]
1085
01:03:06,083 --> 01:03:09,186
This time,
I really was going legit.
1086
01:03:09,253 --> 01:03:12,489
All I had to do
was make the gang understand.
1087
01:03:15,459 --> 01:03:17,394
[ Bang ]
1088
01:03:17,461 --> 01:03:19,496
Who did that?
1089
01:03:19,563 --> 01:03:22,566
Aw, sorry.
Did I get you?
1090
01:03:22,632 --> 01:03:24,534
You ruined the jacket.
1091
01:03:24,601 --> 01:03:26,971
Aw!
See?
1092
01:03:27,037 --> 01:03:29,106
When will we tell
the boys about Johnny?
1093
01:03:29,173 --> 01:03:34,244
As soon as he gets here.
I wanna see the look
on his face.
1094
01:03:34,311 --> 01:03:37,581
[ Coughing ]
1095
01:03:40,217 --> 01:03:43,220
You're not doing
yourself any good.
1096
01:03:43,287 --> 01:03:48,258
And for you kids out there
who are thinking about smoking,
1097
01:03:48,325 --> 01:03:49,726
don't start.
1098
01:03:49,793 --> 01:03:52,162
And if you started, stop.
1099
01:03:52,229 --> 01:03:55,132
Smoking don't
make you look tough.
1100
01:03:55,199 --> 01:03:57,767
It makes you look stupid.
1101
01:03:57,834 --> 01:04:01,105
Put chewing gum
in your mouth instead.
1102
01:04:01,171 --> 01:04:03,207
That's what Johnny does.
1103
01:04:03,273 --> 01:04:09,213
Smoking is the worst thing
you can do to your body.
1104
01:04:09,279 --> 01:04:11,248
Huh uh ya!
1105
01:04:11,315 --> 01:04:12,782
See?
1106
01:04:12,849 --> 01:04:15,185
Hey, Johnny,
let's have it.
1107
01:04:15,252 --> 01:04:18,388
I'll be late
for target practice.
1108
01:04:18,455 --> 01:04:20,824
There's an opera
letting out.
1109
01:04:20,891 --> 01:04:22,292
All right.
1110
01:04:22,359 --> 01:04:24,962
- Johnny Dangerously's
going legit.
- Le what?
1111
01:04:25,029 --> 01:04:27,331
Legit.
Le why?
1112
01:04:27,397 --> 01:04:30,767
Because Johnny Dangerously
is Johnny Kelly,
1113
01:04:30,834 --> 01:04:32,970
D.A. Tommy Kelly's brother.
1114
01:04:37,975 --> 01:04:40,177
Johnny,
is this true?
1115
01:04:40,244 --> 01:04:43,047
I don't know
how to react.
1116
01:04:43,113 --> 01:04:46,716
Yeah, kid, it is true.
1117
01:04:46,783 --> 01:04:49,053
Tommy Kelly
is my brother.
1118
01:04:49,119 --> 01:04:51,121
I'm proud of him.
1119
01:04:51,188 --> 01:04:53,723
Sure. You worked
with him,
1120
01:04:53,790 --> 01:04:56,093
helping him
in his career.
1121
01:04:56,160 --> 01:04:58,695
Now that he's on top,
1122
01:04:58,762 --> 01:05:01,731
you're running out
on us.
1123
01:05:01,798 --> 01:05:04,668
You don't care
about crime.
1124
01:05:04,734 --> 01:05:06,103
That's right.
1125
01:05:06,170 --> 01:05:08,572
I don't care about crime?
1126
01:05:08,638 --> 01:05:13,177
I've been devoted
to crime since I was 12.
1127
01:05:13,243 --> 01:05:17,681
I think we ought to
enjoy what we got.
1128
01:05:17,747 --> 01:05:19,749
We got plenty.
1129
01:05:19,816 --> 01:05:22,586
I'm closing
this store for good.
1130
01:05:22,652 --> 01:05:26,123
Well, I'm reopening it
under new management.
1131
01:05:26,190 --> 01:05:28,158
Oh, no, you're not.
1132
01:05:28,225 --> 01:05:32,196
You don't have the keys,
and I do.
1133
01:05:32,262 --> 01:05:35,732
I'm giving them
to the crime commissioner.
1134
01:05:35,799 --> 01:05:38,168
And us with them, huh?
1135
01:05:38,235 --> 01:05:41,305
I knew it.
He's turning squealer.
1136
01:05:41,371 --> 01:05:43,207
You know,
1137
01:05:43,273 --> 01:05:46,310
I'm bored
with slapping you around.
1138
01:05:46,376 --> 01:05:48,645
Bores me.
1139
01:05:50,814 --> 01:05:52,749
Don't worry, fellas.
1140
01:05:52,816 --> 01:05:55,752
You guys are in the clear.
1141
01:05:55,819 --> 01:05:57,721
It's me they're after.
1142
01:05:57,787 --> 01:05:59,556
[ Coughing ]
1143
01:06:02,326 --> 01:06:05,662
Dirty Jew,
shanty nigger,
white trash bastard!
1144
01:06:05,729 --> 01:06:09,666
Go ahead!
Walk all over
the little beggar!
1145
01:06:23,913 --> 01:06:25,815
Commissioner,
1146
01:06:25,882 --> 01:06:29,019
there's the evidence
against me, just like
I promised.
1147
01:06:29,086 --> 01:06:32,922
Use it.
I'm ready to pay my debt.
1148
01:06:32,989 --> 01:06:34,724
Hey,
1149
01:06:34,791 --> 01:06:36,826
how about a thank you?
1150
01:06:36,893 --> 01:06:40,497
Hey, how about me
getting out of here?
1151
01:06:40,564 --> 01:06:43,533
Hey, how about me
getting knocked out?
1152
01:06:56,080 --> 01:06:59,749
Hey, Johnny,
I'd love to stick around,
see how this turns out,
1153
01:06:59,816 --> 01:07:02,752
but I got
a store to open.
1154
01:07:12,096 --> 01:07:15,165
Ha ha ha!
1155
01:07:18,602 --> 01:07:21,671
You lousy Wop,
Slovak, Chink, Jap,
1156
01:07:21,738 --> 01:07:23,107
Polack, Kraut, fags!
1157
01:07:23,173 --> 01:07:25,509
Hiya, doll.
What's your name?
1158
01:07:25,575 --> 01:07:29,012
Mary Margaret
Katherine Danine.
1159
01:07:29,079 --> 01:07:30,914
How'd you like to
make some money?
1160
01:07:30,980 --> 01:07:33,250
One at a time
or together?
1161
01:07:33,317 --> 01:07:37,387
How much to clean 708
and forget you saw us?
1162
01:07:37,454 --> 01:07:39,789
$17,000.
1163
01:07:39,856 --> 01:07:42,559
All right,
17 grand it is.
1164
01:07:42,626 --> 01:07:46,062
Forget we ever
gave you this money.
1165
01:07:46,130 --> 01:07:48,064
What money?
1166
01:07:48,132 --> 01:07:50,200
That-a girl.
1167
01:07:53,170 --> 01:07:55,004
Johnny!
Johnny!
1168
01:07:55,071 --> 01:07:57,674
One at a time, boys.
1169
01:07:57,741 --> 01:07:59,576
Did you do it?
1170
01:07:59,643 --> 01:08:02,679
You know better
than to ask that.
1171
01:08:02,746 --> 01:08:04,581
Explain the gun.
1172
01:08:04,648 --> 01:08:08,185
I been framed
like the Mona Lisa.
1173
01:08:08,252 --> 01:08:11,121
Why were you seeing
the commissioner?
1174
01:08:11,188 --> 01:08:13,056
I was going legit.
1175
01:08:13,123 --> 01:08:14,158
Le what?
1176
01:08:14,224 --> 01:08:15,859
Legit.
As in legitimate.
1177
01:08:15,925 --> 01:08:17,127
Oh.
Oh.
1178
01:08:17,194 --> 01:08:19,263
How about a picture?
1179
01:08:19,329 --> 01:08:23,133
Sure.
It's the first picture
of Johnny Dangerously,
1180
01:08:23,200 --> 01:08:26,069
so make it a good one.
1181
01:08:26,136 --> 01:08:27,437
Great.
1182
01:08:27,504 --> 01:08:28,738
Thanks.
1183
01:08:28,805 --> 01:08:30,640
All right.
Thank you.
1184
01:08:35,245 --> 01:08:37,247
Empty your pockets,
Johnny.
1185
01:08:43,753 --> 01:08:44,888
Wait a minute.
1186
01:08:44,954 --> 01:08:47,791
I can't find
my cigarette case.
1187
01:08:47,857 --> 01:08:49,726
Maybe it's
in another suit.
1188
01:08:49,793 --> 01:08:51,761
I don't think...
1189
01:08:51,828 --> 01:08:54,164
Your car.
No.
1190
01:08:54,231 --> 01:08:56,800
Maybe it's on the sink.
1191
01:08:56,866 --> 01:08:59,603
No. It's my
good luck piece.
1192
01:08:59,669 --> 01:09:03,139
Whoever has it
bumped off the commissioner.
1193
01:09:04,107 --> 01:09:05,642
Excuse me.
1194
01:09:05,709 --> 01:09:09,246
Johnny, I brought
your bail money.
1195
01:09:09,313 --> 01:09:12,516
- [ Whistles ]
- I hate to disappoint you.
1196
01:09:12,582 --> 01:09:14,884
Johnny's being held
without bail.
1197
01:09:14,951 --> 01:09:16,853
By whose orders?
1198
01:09:16,920 --> 01:09:18,922
The man who's prosecuting--
1199
01:09:18,988 --> 01:09:20,890
the D.A. himself.
1200
01:09:22,659 --> 01:09:26,162
This is what you
call going legit?
1201
01:09:26,230 --> 01:09:29,266
I swear,
I been set up.
1202
01:09:29,333 --> 01:09:33,203
Find the cigarette case,
you'll find the murderer.
1203
01:09:33,270 --> 01:09:35,472
There are a million
cigarette cases.
1204
01:09:35,539 --> 01:09:38,542
Only one has a bullet dent
and smells like gum.
1205
01:09:38,608 --> 01:09:40,577
Don't say anything
until you get a lawyer.
1206
01:09:40,644 --> 01:09:43,713
I can handle
my own brother.
1207
01:09:43,780 --> 01:09:45,749
You and he--
1208
01:09:45,815 --> 01:09:47,784
Me and him's brothers.
1209
01:09:47,851 --> 01:09:49,886
We were brothers.
1210
01:09:49,953 --> 01:09:51,154
Brothers!
1211
01:09:51,221 --> 01:09:53,156
Hey, wait, I'll go!
1212
01:09:53,223 --> 01:09:55,559
Get out of my way!
1213
01:09:56,926 --> 01:09:58,662
Yo!
1214
01:10:05,269 --> 01:10:07,136
Is that
the city edition?
1215
01:10:07,203 --> 01:10:08,638
What?
1216
01:10:08,705 --> 01:10:12,141
I said, is that
the city edition?
1217
01:10:12,208 --> 01:10:13,777
Oh, no.
1218
01:10:13,843 --> 01:10:15,779
Son of a bitch.
1219
01:10:15,845 --> 01:10:17,681
Now I'm deaf!
1220
01:10:26,222 --> 01:10:27,757
He's guilty.
1221
01:10:27,824 --> 01:10:29,158
He's guilty.
1222
01:10:29,225 --> 01:10:30,760
Guilty.
1223
01:10:30,827 --> 01:10:32,296
Aah!
1224
01:10:35,365 --> 01:10:36,966
Mrs. Kelly.
1225
01:10:37,033 --> 01:10:39,803
Get me
from me best side.
1226
01:10:39,869 --> 01:10:41,805
Got anything to say?
1227
01:10:41,871 --> 01:10:43,673
I got mixed feelings--
1228
01:10:43,740 --> 01:10:46,776
thrilled for Tommy,
sad for Johnny.
1229
01:10:46,843 --> 01:10:48,177
Mr. Kelly.
1230
01:10:48,244 --> 01:10:49,713
No comment.
1231
01:10:49,779 --> 01:10:53,717
This is
the toughest thing
I've ever done.
1232
01:10:56,286 --> 01:10:58,254
Nice work, Mr. D.A.
1233
01:10:58,322 --> 01:11:00,690
My name is Danny Vermin.
1234
01:11:00,757 --> 01:11:03,727
I was associated
with your brother.
1235
01:11:03,793 --> 01:11:08,332
Thank you for sending him
to the hot seat.
1236
01:11:09,265 --> 01:11:10,667
Ha ha ha!
1237
01:11:10,734 --> 01:11:13,337
Watch.
Johnny taught me this.
1238
01:11:14,604 --> 01:11:15,705
Aah!
1239
01:11:15,772 --> 01:11:19,309
You shouldn't kick me
in the balls.
1240
01:11:19,376 --> 01:11:23,212
My sister kicked me
in the balls once.
1241
01:11:23,279 --> 01:11:25,615
Look, Mom.
1242
01:11:25,682 --> 01:11:27,451
It's Johnny's
cigarette case.
1243
01:11:27,517 --> 01:11:30,119
The one he was
talking about.
1244
01:11:30,186 --> 01:11:31,621
Give me that.
1245
01:11:31,688 --> 01:11:34,157
It's my brother's
cigarette case.
1246
01:11:34,223 --> 01:11:36,159
Johnny didn't do it.
1247
01:11:36,225 --> 01:11:38,194
I'll get you, Vermin,
1248
01:11:38,261 --> 01:11:40,897
if it's
the last thing I do.
1249
01:11:40,964 --> 01:11:44,668
It just might be, Mr. D.A.
1250
01:11:47,236 --> 01:11:49,238
Johnny ain't guilty,
1251
01:11:49,305 --> 01:11:53,076
and you sent him
to the big house.
1252
01:12:01,885 --> 01:12:04,488
Johnny, it's an honor
to have you on death row.
1253
01:12:04,554 --> 01:12:07,223
Don't be silly.
The pleasure's all mine.
1254
01:12:07,290 --> 01:12:11,194
Hi, Pop.
Still here, huh?
You bet.
1255
01:12:11,260 --> 01:12:13,597
Tough break.
John.
1256
01:12:13,663 --> 01:12:16,232
How the hell are you?
1257
01:12:16,299 --> 01:12:18,267
You're beautiful,
Johnny.
1258
01:12:18,334 --> 01:12:21,971
Why don't you
get the boys some quiche?
1259
01:12:22,038 --> 01:12:24,040
There you go.
1260
01:12:24,107 --> 01:12:27,076
Es spiritus sanctum.
1261
01:12:27,143 --> 01:12:31,648
Johnny,
this is one of our
best guards, Tony.
1262
01:12:31,715 --> 01:12:33,783
Hiya, Tony.
How are you?
1263
01:12:33,850 --> 01:12:37,387
You took a shot
at me once.
1264
01:12:37,454 --> 01:12:39,656
I never forget a gun.
1265
01:12:39,723 --> 01:12:43,026
Are we going to
do this or what?
1266
01:12:55,505 --> 01:12:57,507
There's nothing left. Look.
1267
01:12:57,574 --> 01:12:59,676
Finest metal.
1268
01:12:59,743 --> 01:13:04,548
I keep telling you, Howard,
the boy needs a role model.
1269
01:13:04,614 --> 01:13:06,650
Rocky, I'm so horny.
1270
01:13:06,716 --> 01:13:11,020
Oh, Johnny, Vermin's turning
the place into a dive.
1271
01:13:11,087 --> 01:13:12,622
And Johnny--
1272
01:13:12,689 --> 01:13:17,126
Don't tell me.
He put in a salad bar.
1273
01:13:17,193 --> 01:13:19,596
He's making
a play for me.
1274
01:13:19,663 --> 01:13:24,200
Wait a minute.
That's just what we want.
1275
01:13:24,267 --> 01:13:26,402
I got to prove
he framed me.
1276
01:13:26,470 --> 01:13:29,038
Lil, play up to him.
1277
01:13:29,105 --> 01:13:32,809
But, Johnny--
No "buts."
Keep your eyes and ears open.
1278
01:13:32,876 --> 01:13:36,012
The first thing you hear,
get it to me
on the grapevine.
1279
01:13:36,079 --> 01:13:38,815
Got it.
That-a girl.
1280
01:13:38,882 --> 01:13:40,817
Come here.
1281
01:13:46,490 --> 01:13:49,392
Next time,
I'll bring a can opener.
1282
01:13:49,459 --> 01:13:51,895
Good idea.
Come here.
1283
01:13:55,431 --> 01:13:57,601
Yo!
1284
01:14:06,510 --> 01:14:08,845
I can hear again
and I can see.
1285
01:14:08,912 --> 01:14:12,982
I can hear again
and I can see!
1286
01:14:13,049 --> 01:14:15,184
But who am I?
1287
01:14:22,325 --> 01:14:24,761
Tommy,
please eat something.
1288
01:14:24,828 --> 01:14:27,130
I not gonna eat until
I've saved my brother.
1289
01:14:27,196 --> 01:14:31,167
Keep up
the good work,
Governor Kelly.
1290
01:14:34,037 --> 01:14:36,172
So it's governor?
1291
01:14:36,239 --> 01:14:38,341
Just cheap talk, Mom.
1292
01:14:38,407 --> 01:14:42,111
Anybody that would
send his brother to
the hot seat gets my vote.
1293
01:14:42,178 --> 01:14:46,816
Mom! I'm trying to prove
Johnny's innocence.
1294
01:14:46,883 --> 01:14:49,819
If I leave
things to you,
1295
01:14:49,886 --> 01:14:52,722
Johnny will fry
like his father.
1296
01:14:52,789 --> 01:14:57,894
Your old mom just
might have something
for you tonight.
1297
01:15:08,672 --> 01:15:10,239
Who is it?
1298
01:15:10,306 --> 01:15:12,842
Open up.
It's Ma Kelly.
1299
01:15:12,909 --> 01:15:16,580
What do you want?
I gotta talk to you.
1300
01:15:16,646 --> 01:15:18,982
We have nothing to
say to each other.
1301
01:15:19,048 --> 01:15:22,786
We got a lot to say.
We got a lot in common.
1302
01:15:22,852 --> 01:15:24,721
We both scrub floors,
1303
01:15:24,788 --> 01:15:26,723
we're both swell lookers,
1304
01:15:26,790 --> 01:15:28,658
and we're not Chinese.
1305
01:15:28,725 --> 01:15:31,294
You been doing
your homework.
1306
01:15:31,360 --> 01:15:33,262
What do you want?
1307
01:15:33,329 --> 01:15:38,167
- How much do you want
to tell the truth?
- $19,500.
1308
01:15:41,437 --> 01:15:44,273
Boy, am I having
a good year!
1309
01:15:49,913 --> 01:15:51,748
What's the matter,
you got no manners?
1310
01:15:51,815 --> 01:15:55,752
Send me a bill for the door.
You don't even wait
for the body to get cold.
1311
01:15:55,819 --> 01:15:57,887
I go where
the action is.
1312
01:15:57,954 --> 01:16:00,523
Where's your mom?
You send her
up the river too?
1313
01:16:00,590 --> 01:16:02,759
What do you want,
Mr. D.A.?
1314
01:16:02,826 --> 01:16:05,795
And make it quick, huh?
1315
01:16:05,862 --> 01:16:08,431
I have a subpoena
for you.
1316
01:16:08,497 --> 01:16:12,335
What for? You ain't
got a thing on me.
1317
01:16:12,401 --> 01:16:17,340
Does the name
Mary Margaret Katherine Danine
strike a familiar chord?
1318
01:16:17,406 --> 01:16:19,442
I'm tone deaf.
1319
01:16:19,508 --> 01:16:21,811
Too bad.
She's singing
like a canary.
1320
01:16:21,878 --> 01:16:25,248
We got her
in her own cage.
1321
01:16:25,314 --> 01:16:28,284
I'm going to enjoy
sending you to the chair.
1322
01:16:28,351 --> 01:16:33,857
Come on, boys.
I don't like
the smell here.
1323
01:16:33,923 --> 01:16:37,393
That cleaning dame
will spill her guts.
1324
01:16:37,460 --> 01:16:39,829
We can't get to her.
1325
01:16:39,896 --> 01:16:42,966
But we can get to him.
1326
01:16:43,032 --> 01:16:44,433
How, boss?
1327
01:16:44,500 --> 01:16:46,870
Don't you listen
to the radio?
1328
01:16:46,936 --> 01:16:49,238
The governor
and D.A. Tommy Kelly...
1329
01:16:49,305 --> 01:16:53,242
will attend the premiere
of the new James Cagney movie
tomorrow night.
1330
01:16:53,309 --> 01:16:56,379
Should be clear skies
as the governor
and D.A. Tommy Kelly...
1331
01:16:56,445 --> 01:16:58,381
attend the new
James Cagney movie.
1332
01:16:58,447 --> 01:17:01,450
Which theater?
1333
01:17:01,517 --> 01:17:03,286
[ Radio ]
The Savoy, on 37th.
1334
01:17:03,352 --> 01:17:06,656
It will be like
shooting ducks in a pond.
1335
01:17:06,723 --> 01:17:08,992
Once we knock the D.A. off,
1336
01:17:09,058 --> 01:17:12,662
that cleaning dame
will clam up just fine.
1337
01:17:15,699 --> 01:17:17,834
Get this to Johnny
on the grapevine.
1338
01:17:17,901 --> 01:17:20,436
Vermin's going to kill
Johnny's brother...
1339
01:17:20,503 --> 01:17:22,505
at the Savoy Theater
tomorrow night.
1340
01:17:22,571 --> 01:17:24,808
Got it?
Got it.
1341
01:17:31,214 --> 01:17:34,450
Vermin's going to kill
Johnny's brother
at the Savoy Theater.
1342
01:17:34,517 --> 01:17:36,585
Pass it on.
1343
01:17:36,652 --> 01:17:39,588
Vermin's going to kill
Johnny's brother.
1344
01:17:39,655 --> 01:17:42,591
Vermin's going to kill
Johnny's mother.
1345
01:17:42,658 --> 01:17:46,095
Vermin's mother
is going to kill Johnny.
1346
01:17:46,162 --> 01:17:48,998
[ Mumbling ]
1347
01:17:49,065 --> 01:17:51,534
Urgent message
through the grapevine.
1348
01:17:51,600 --> 01:17:54,704
Yeah? What is it?
1349
01:17:54,771 --> 01:17:59,375
Johnny and the mothers
are playin' "Stompin"
at the Savoy in Vermont.
1350
01:17:59,442 --> 01:18:02,278
Vermin's going to kill
my brother at the Savoy?
1351
01:18:02,345 --> 01:18:04,280
I didn't say that.
1352
01:18:04,347 --> 01:18:06,315
I know this grapevine.
1353
01:18:06,382 --> 01:18:09,685
I got to get out of here.
1354
01:18:11,320 --> 01:18:12,655
Guard!
1355
01:18:12,722 --> 01:18:14,791
Come here.
1356
01:18:15,725 --> 01:18:17,160
Yeah?
1357
01:18:17,226 --> 01:18:20,429
Smell that food.
I think it's rotten.
1358
01:18:42,819 --> 01:18:45,321
What's all this
about, Johnny?
1359
01:18:45,388 --> 01:18:47,757
I can't take it, Warden!
1360
01:18:47,824 --> 01:18:50,794
Send me to
the chair tonight!
1361
01:18:50,860 --> 01:18:52,728
The waiting's
driving me crazy!
1362
01:18:52,796 --> 01:18:54,898
You still got two weeks.
1363
01:18:54,964 --> 01:18:57,733
I don't want them!
Fry me tonight!
1364
01:18:57,801 --> 01:19:00,336
Anything for you.
1365
01:19:00,403 --> 01:19:02,806
We'll bump Steinberg.
1366
01:19:02,872 --> 01:19:06,075
Dangerously will go
to the chair tonight.
1367
01:19:13,716 --> 01:19:16,585
Everyone who is anyone
is here tonight,
1368
01:19:16,652 --> 01:19:20,156
including Mr. Crimefighter,
District Attorney Tommy Kelly.
1369
01:19:20,223 --> 01:19:24,260
They're talking about you
as our next governor.
1370
01:19:24,327 --> 01:19:26,095
That's very nice,
1371
01:19:26,162 --> 01:19:28,731
but all I'm concerned about...
1372
01:19:28,798 --> 01:19:31,134
is proving
my brother's innocence.
1373
01:19:31,200 --> 01:19:35,371
Johnny, if you're
listening, I love you.
1374
01:19:45,348 --> 01:19:47,150
Your turn, Johnny.
1375
01:19:47,216 --> 01:19:50,286
The priest you requested
has arrived.
1376
01:19:50,353 --> 01:19:52,721
Are you ready, my son?
1377
01:19:52,788 --> 01:19:56,792
I'm ready
if you are, Father.
1378
01:20:02,165 --> 01:20:04,567
Dominus obiscum, Nabisco.
1379
01:20:04,633 --> 01:20:06,735
Espiritus sanctum.
1380
01:20:06,802 --> 01:20:09,772
They gustovus...
So long, Johnny.
1381
01:20:09,839 --> 01:20:11,340
me gustovus,
you gustovus.
1382
01:20:11,407 --> 01:20:14,878
We miss the bus,
they miss the bus.
1383
01:20:14,944 --> 01:20:17,346
Be brave, Johnny.
1384
01:20:17,413 --> 01:20:19,215
When's the next bus?
1385
01:20:19,282 --> 01:20:21,851
Sum cum laude,
magnum cum laude,
1386
01:20:21,918 --> 01:20:24,387
the radio's still laude.
1387
01:20:24,453 --> 01:20:26,222
Good luck, Johnny.
1388
01:20:26,289 --> 01:20:28,657
Semper fidelus,
high fidelus.
1389
01:20:28,724 --> 01:20:31,627
Why didn't I take shop?
1390
01:20:31,694 --> 01:20:36,632
Post meridian,
antimeridian, Uncle Meridian,
all the little meridians.
1391
01:20:36,699 --> 01:20:39,168
Good-bye, Johnny.
Good-bye, Rock.
1392
01:20:39,235 --> 01:20:41,737
The Magna Carta,
Master Charga...
1393
01:20:41,804 --> 01:20:44,207
Spit in his eye,
Johnny.
1394
01:20:44,273 --> 01:20:47,610
dumpro kelus,
lots of Vitalis.
You bet, Rabbi.
1395
01:20:50,179 --> 01:20:52,916
Do you have
any last words, Johnny?
1396
01:20:54,650 --> 01:20:57,353
Well said.
1397
01:21:03,659 --> 01:21:08,164
Okay, Warden.
This is where
we say good-bye.
1398
01:21:08,231 --> 01:21:12,668
You weren't really
going to kill me, were you?
1399
01:21:12,735 --> 01:21:14,603
What, with this?
1400
01:21:22,678 --> 01:21:27,250
[ Siren Blaring ]
1401
01:21:27,316 --> 01:21:28,918
[ Radio ]
Calling all cars.
1402
01:21:28,985 --> 01:21:32,555
Johnny Dangerously
has just escaped
from state prison.
1403
01:21:32,621 --> 01:21:36,993
Could I have a popcorn,
a Milk Duds,
and a white fish?
1404
01:21:55,444 --> 01:21:57,981
When we going to
give it to him?
1405
01:21:58,047 --> 01:22:00,483
Just when Cagney
gets his in the movie,
1406
01:22:00,549 --> 01:22:03,719
a few minutes from now.
1407
01:22:03,786 --> 01:22:05,955
Calling all cars.
Calling all cars.
1408
01:22:06,022 --> 01:22:08,157
Be on the lookout
for Johnny Dangerously...
1409
01:22:08,224 --> 01:22:10,126
and two accomplices
in a black sedan.
1410
01:22:10,193 --> 01:22:11,961
I repeat,
in a black sedan.
1411
01:22:12,028 --> 01:22:14,763
Black sedan, huh?
1412
01:22:14,830 --> 01:22:16,732
We'll see about that.
1413
01:22:16,799 --> 01:22:18,767
I hope this works.
1414
01:22:18,834 --> 01:22:21,170
It always does
at home.
1415
01:22:21,237 --> 01:22:23,339
Come on, shelf paper.
1416
01:22:28,044 --> 01:22:30,479
Step back
or they'll plug me.
1417
01:22:30,546 --> 01:22:32,715
Get out of
the way, boss.
No!
1418
01:22:57,173 --> 01:22:59,108
Calling all cars.
Calling all cars.
1419
01:22:59,175 --> 01:23:01,044
Johnny Dangerously
now driving a white sedan,
1420
01:23:01,110 --> 01:23:03,979
disguised
as a trout Fisherman.
1421
01:23:04,047 --> 01:23:06,315
Johnny,
we've been spotted.
1422
01:23:09,152 --> 01:23:11,620
Peel the next layer.
1423
01:23:14,323 --> 01:23:17,426
Someday that will be
in Johnny Junior's room.
1424
01:23:17,493 --> 01:23:19,628
Sure, sure.
1425
01:23:19,695 --> 01:23:22,965
There he goes.
Get him!
Don't let him get away.
1426
01:23:23,032 --> 01:23:25,634
He knows too much.
1427
01:23:27,336 --> 01:23:31,607
Calling all cars.
Be on the lookout for--
1428
01:23:31,674 --> 01:23:33,509
Now, listen to this.
1429
01:23:33,576 --> 01:23:35,611
Dangerously and accomplices,
dressed as nuns,
1430
01:23:35,678 --> 01:23:40,483
driving a sedan covered with--
oh, you'll love this--
duckies and bunnies.
1431
01:23:40,549 --> 01:23:43,552
Calling all cars,
calling all cars.
1432
01:23:43,619 --> 01:23:46,355
Come to Dooley's bar.
I'm buying.
1433
01:23:53,462 --> 01:23:56,165
There's something
you don't see every day.
1434
01:23:58,401 --> 01:24:00,903
Everybody stay
where you are.
1435
01:24:00,969 --> 01:24:03,038
Alan, keep down.
1436
01:24:12,448 --> 01:24:14,817
You might as well
come down, Pembroke.
1437
01:24:14,883 --> 01:24:17,786
There's no one left
but you.
1438
01:24:28,664 --> 01:24:30,366
Ah, shit.
1439
01:24:30,433 --> 01:24:31,800
Aah!
1440
01:24:36,972 --> 01:24:38,841
Johnny, are you okay?
1441
01:24:38,907 --> 01:24:40,943
Sure, kid.
1442
01:24:41,009 --> 01:24:43,279
You didn't get hit,
did you?
1443
01:24:43,346 --> 01:24:45,414
I don't think so.
1444
01:24:47,416 --> 01:24:50,119
Boy, does that
come in handy!
1445
01:24:50,186 --> 01:24:53,622
You would have taken
the bullet for me.
1446
01:24:53,689 --> 01:24:57,226
I was counting on
a lot of missing.
1447
01:24:57,293 --> 01:24:59,628
Johnny!
Oh!
1448
01:24:59,695 --> 01:25:04,500
We'll have to take you
back to the big house.
1449
01:25:04,567 --> 01:25:09,838
I have a witness
that will clear Johnny.
That's your man!
1450
01:25:09,905 --> 01:25:11,874
Officer,
release this man.
1451
01:25:11,940 --> 01:25:14,577
I'm granting him
a full pardon.
1452
01:25:14,643 --> 01:25:16,078
Oh, Johnny.
1453
01:25:16,145 --> 01:25:18,147
Hey, thanks, Gov.
1454
01:25:18,214 --> 01:25:21,116
You shouldn't
shoot me, Johnny.
1455
01:25:21,184 --> 01:25:23,586
My grandmother
shot me once.
1456
01:25:25,621 --> 01:25:28,991
Johnny, darling,
you must be exhausted.
1457
01:25:29,057 --> 01:25:31,026
Breaking out of prison,
1458
01:25:31,093 --> 01:25:34,230
racing here
to save your brother.
1459
01:25:34,297 --> 01:25:37,032
You've had a full day.
1460
01:25:37,099 --> 01:25:38,701
Funny, Ma,
I'm not even tired.
1461
01:25:38,767 --> 01:25:42,305
Must have been that nap
after lunch.
1462
01:25:42,371 --> 01:25:44,873
Oh, I'll have
some stories...
1463
01:25:44,940 --> 01:25:47,243
to tell my
grandchildren--
1464
01:25:47,310 --> 01:25:49,345
if I have any.
1465
01:25:49,412 --> 01:25:54,149
Lil, let's start
a little gang of our own.
1466
01:25:54,217 --> 01:25:55,684
That okay?
1467
01:25:55,751 --> 01:25:57,553
Oh, Johnny, I like it.
1468
01:25:57,620 --> 01:26:00,756
Kid, I'll make you
love it.
1469
01:26:06,862 --> 01:26:08,964
So that's my story.
1470
01:26:09,031 --> 01:26:11,099
I hope
you learned something.
1471
01:26:11,166 --> 01:26:12,935
I sure did.
1472
01:26:13,001 --> 01:26:14,937
Wow! The electric chair.
1473
01:26:15,003 --> 01:26:16,539
I'm going straight.
1474
01:26:16,605 --> 01:26:19,308
You better see that you do,
1475
01:26:19,375 --> 01:26:21,910
or I'm coming after you.
1476
01:26:21,977 --> 01:26:23,779
Get out of here.
1477
01:26:23,846 --> 01:26:28,016
Wait. Aren't you
forgetting something?
1478
01:26:28,083 --> 01:26:29,418
[ Meow ]
1479
01:26:32,355 --> 01:26:34,323
There you go.
1480
01:26:34,390 --> 01:26:36,425
Thanks, Mr. Kelly.
1481
01:26:38,561 --> 01:26:40,296
Hey, kid.
1482
01:26:40,363 --> 01:26:41,930
Don't forget.
1483
01:26:41,997 --> 01:26:43,799
Crime doesn't pay.
1484
01:26:43,866 --> 01:26:44,867
Right.
1485
01:26:46,969 --> 01:26:49,505
[ Horn Honks ]
1486
01:26:49,572 --> 01:26:51,407
Johnny.
1487
01:26:58,381 --> 01:27:00,816
Well, it paid a little.
1488
01:27:08,324 --> 01:27:09,625
* We're all alone *
1489
01:27:09,692 --> 01:27:13,028
* No chaperone
can get our number *
1490
01:27:13,095 --> 01:27:15,264
* The world's in slumber *
1491
01:27:15,331 --> 01:27:17,666
* Let's misbehave *
1492
01:27:17,733 --> 01:27:20,303
* There's something wild
about you, child *
1493
01:27:20,369 --> 01:27:22,505
* That's so contagious *
1494
01:27:22,571 --> 01:27:24,273
* Let's be outrageous *
1495
01:27:24,340 --> 01:27:26,675
* Let's misbehave *
1496
01:27:26,742 --> 01:27:28,544
* When Adam won eve's hand *
1497
01:27:28,611 --> 01:27:31,580
* He wouldn't stand
for teasin' *
1498
01:27:31,647 --> 01:27:33,181
* He didn't care about *
1499
01:27:33,248 --> 01:27:36,352
* Those apples out of season *
1500
01:27:36,419 --> 01:27:38,387
* They say the spring
means just one thing *
1501
01:27:38,454 --> 01:27:40,255
* To little lovebirds *
1502
01:27:40,323 --> 01:27:43,091
* We're not above birds *
1503
01:27:43,158 --> 01:27:45,461
* Let's misbehave *
1504
01:27:45,528 --> 01:27:47,530
* It's getting late,
and while I wait *
1505
01:27:47,596 --> 01:27:50,032
* My poor heart aches on *
1506
01:27:50,098 --> 01:27:52,301
* Why keep the brakes on *
1507
01:27:52,368 --> 01:27:54,670
* Let's misbehave *
1508
01:27:54,737 --> 01:27:57,105
* I feel quite sure
a good amour *
1509
01:27:57,172 --> 01:27:59,542
* Would be attractive *
1510
01:27:59,608 --> 01:28:02,044
* While we're still active *
1511
01:28:02,110 --> 01:28:04,447
* Let's misbehave *
1512
01:28:04,513 --> 01:28:06,281
* You know my heart is true *
1513
01:28:06,349 --> 01:28:09,084
* When you say
you for me care *
1514
01:28:09,151 --> 01:28:10,686
* Somebody's sure to tell *
1515
01:28:10,753 --> 01:28:13,722
* But what the heck
do we care *
1516
01:28:13,789 --> 01:28:16,024
* They say that bears
have love affairs *
1517
01:28:16,091 --> 01:28:18,361
* And even camels *
1518
01:28:18,427 --> 01:28:20,629
* We're merely mammals *
1519
01:28:20,696 --> 01:28:23,098
* Let's misbehave *
1520
01:28:23,165 --> 01:28:24,800
* If you'd be oh, so sweet *
1521
01:28:24,867 --> 01:28:27,803
* And only heed
your fate, dear *
1522
01:28:27,870 --> 01:28:32,475
* Would be the great event
of 1928, dear *
1523
01:28:32,541 --> 01:28:34,677
* They say the spring
means just one thing *
1524
01:28:34,743 --> 01:28:37,212
* To little lovebirds *
1525
01:28:37,279 --> 01:28:39,415
* We're not above birds *
1526
01:28:39,482 --> 01:28:43,652
* Let's misbehave **
99006
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