All language subtitles for Englishbbbb

af Afrikaans
sq Albanian
am Amharic
ar Arabic
hy Armenian
az Azerbaijani
eu Basque
be Belarusian
bn Bengali
bs Bosnian
bg Bulgarian
ca Catalan
ceb Cebuano
ny Chichewa
zh-CN Chinese (Simplified)
zh-TW Chinese (Traditional)
co Corsican
hr Croatian
cs Czech
da Danish
nl Dutch
en English Download
eo Esperanto
et Estonian
tl Filipino
fi Finnish
fr French
fy Frisian
gl Galician
ka Georgian
de German
el Greek
gu Gujarati
ht Haitian Creole
ha Hausa
haw Hawaiian
iw Hebrew
hi Hindi
hmn Hmong
hu Hungarian
is Icelandic
ig Igbo
id Indonesian
ga Irish
it Italian
ja Japanese
jw Javanese
kn Kannada
kk Kazakh
km Khmer
ko Korean
ku Kurdish (Kurmanji)
ky Kyrgyz
lo Lao
la Latin
lv Latvian
lt Lithuanian
lb Luxembourgish
mk Macedonian
mg Malagasy
ms Malay
ml Malayalam
mt Maltese
mi Maori
mr Marathi
mn Mongolian
my Myanmar (Burmese)
ne Nepali
no Norwegian
ps Pashto
fa Persian
pl Polish
pt Portuguese Download
pa Punjabi
ro Romanian
ru Russian
sm Samoan
gd Scots Gaelic
sr Serbian
st Sesotho
sn Shona
sd Sindhi
si Sinhala
sk Slovak
sl Slovenian
so Somali
es Spanish
su Sundanese
sw Swahili
sv Swedish
tg Tajik
ta Tamil
te Telugu
th Thai
tr Turkish
uk Ukrainian
ur Urdu
uz Uzbek
vi Vietnamese
cy Welsh
xh Xhosa
yi Yiddish
yo Yoruba
zu Zulu
or Odia (Oriya)
rw Kinyarwanda
tk Turkmen
tt Tatar
ug Uyghur
Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:00:14,415 --> 00:00:23,357 ** 2 00:00:23,424 --> 00:00:31,699 ** 3 00:00:31,765 --> 00:00:34,602 * I eat filet mignons seven times a day * 4 00:00:34,668 --> 00:00:37,338 * My bathtub's filled with Perrier * 5 00:00:37,405 --> 00:00:40,708 * What can I say This is the life * 6 00:00:40,774 --> 00:00:43,944 * I buy a dozen cars when I'm in the mood * 7 00:00:44,011 --> 00:00:46,180 * I hire somebody to chew my food * 8 00:00:46,247 --> 00:00:50,017 * I'm an upwardly mobile dude This is the life * 9 00:00:50,084 --> 00:00:53,121 * They say that money corrupts you * 10 00:00:53,187 --> 00:00:55,356 * But I can't really tell * 11 00:00:55,423 --> 00:00:57,491 * I got the whole world at my feet * 12 00:00:57,558 --> 00:00:59,527 * And I think it's pretty swell * 13 00:00:59,593 --> 00:01:02,230 * I got women lined up outside my door * 14 00:01:02,296 --> 00:01:04,565 * They've been waitin' there since a week before * 15 00:01:04,632 --> 00:01:07,701 * Who could ask for more This is the life * 16 00:01:26,787 --> 00:01:30,023 * Whaa da whaa da * * You're dead for a real long time * 17 00:01:30,090 --> 00:01:32,059 * You just can't prevent it * 18 00:01:32,126 --> 00:01:34,362 * So if money can't buy happiness * 19 00:01:34,428 --> 00:01:36,797 * I guess I'll have to rent it * 20 00:01:38,299 --> 00:01:41,502 * Yeah, every day I make the front page news * 21 00:01:41,569 --> 00:01:43,604 * No time to pay my dues * 22 00:01:43,671 --> 00:01:47,341 * I got a million pairs of shoes This is the life * 23 00:01:47,408 --> 00:01:50,178 * That's right, I'm the king Number one * 24 00:01:50,244 --> 00:01:52,613 * I buy monogrammed Kleenex by the ton * 25 00:01:52,680 --> 00:01:54,882 * I pay the bills I call the shots * 26 00:01:54,948 --> 00:01:57,318 * I grease the palms I buy the yachts * 27 00:01:57,385 --> 00:01:59,420 * One thing I can guarantee * 28 00:01:59,487 --> 00:02:01,589 * The best things in life they sure ain't free * 29 00:02:01,655 --> 00:02:03,724 * It's such a thrill just to be me * 30 00:02:03,791 --> 00:02:06,360 * This is the life * 31 00:02:06,427 --> 00:02:10,130 * Ahh * * This is the life ** 32 00:02:20,140 --> 00:02:22,243 [ Horn Honks ] 33 00:02:33,254 --> 00:02:36,190 Anybody hungry? [ Arf Arf ] 34 00:02:36,257 --> 00:02:39,760 Didn't think so. Just kidding. 35 00:02:39,827 --> 00:02:42,463 Okay, fellas, food time. 36 00:02:42,530 --> 00:02:44,932 Bert. Liver, no onions. 37 00:02:44,998 --> 00:02:48,068 Here you go, Bertie. There you go. 38 00:02:48,135 --> 00:02:52,406 And for dessert, there you go. 39 00:02:54,542 --> 00:02:58,679 Connie, Mack, you kids wanted the tuna, hold the Mayo. 40 00:02:58,746 --> 00:03:00,614 Lovely choice. 41 00:03:00,681 --> 00:03:04,585 I'm not crazy about you two living together. 42 00:03:04,652 --> 00:03:07,187 Marvin, you ordered the flounder. 43 00:03:07,255 --> 00:03:10,258 I didn't like the way it looked, 44 00:03:10,324 --> 00:03:12,493 so I prepared something special. 45 00:03:12,560 --> 00:03:15,596 I think you're gonna like this. [ Lips Smacking ] 46 00:03:15,663 --> 00:03:17,598 And maybe not. [ Telephone Rings ] 47 00:03:17,665 --> 00:03:21,201 Okay, here we go. [ Ringing ] 48 00:03:21,269 --> 00:03:24,204 - Polly, get that. - All right. 49 00:03:26,274 --> 00:03:28,476 Kelly's pet shop. Polly speaking. 50 00:03:28,542 --> 00:03:30,544 It's your mother, Johnny. 51 00:03:30,611 --> 00:03:35,048 - Tell her to hold, would ya? - Hang on. 52 00:03:35,115 --> 00:03:37,418 Thanks, pal. Hiya, Ma. 53 00:03:37,485 --> 00:03:42,456 Uh-huh. I was just feeding the animals. 54 00:03:42,523 --> 00:03:45,058 It's probably just the weather. 55 00:03:45,125 --> 00:03:47,528 I wouldn't worry about it. 56 00:03:47,595 --> 00:03:50,564 It will probably get better tomorrow. 57 00:03:50,631 --> 00:03:54,368 If you wouldn't drink so much, the whole thing would clear up. 58 00:03:54,435 --> 00:03:56,570 I'll see you later. 59 00:03:56,637 --> 00:04:00,941 [ Bell Rings ] All right, come here. Hand it over. 60 00:04:01,008 --> 00:04:03,511 What was that noise? 61 00:04:03,577 --> 00:04:06,614 It was this little gadget here. 62 00:04:06,680 --> 00:04:09,750 Prevents stealing. Stops guys like you. 63 00:04:09,817 --> 00:04:13,287 Go ahead. Call the cops. Let's get this over with. 64 00:04:13,354 --> 00:04:15,255 Ah, pretty tough, huh? 65 00:04:15,323 --> 00:04:16,924 Tough enough. 66 00:04:16,990 --> 00:04:18,892 Yeah? You like stealing? 67 00:04:18,959 --> 00:04:20,694 Beats paying for it. 68 00:04:20,761 --> 00:04:22,830 You think stealing makes you a big man? 69 00:04:22,896 --> 00:04:26,367 Bigger than you-- wearing an apron, feeding monkeys. 70 00:04:26,434 --> 00:04:28,636 Ha ha ha. Sit down. 71 00:04:28,702 --> 00:04:31,405 I'll tell you where stealing gets you. 72 00:04:31,472 --> 00:04:33,607 Wake me when you're through. 73 00:04:33,674 --> 00:04:36,444 I started out just like you. Must have been 25 years ago. 74 00:04:36,510 --> 00:04:38,612 What's going on? 75 00:04:38,679 --> 00:04:41,281 Don't worry. It'll end in a couple of minutes. 76 00:04:41,349 --> 00:04:45,786 It always does this when I talk about the past. Anyway, it was 1910. 77 00:04:47,020 --> 00:04:48,889 Times were good in America. 78 00:04:48,956 --> 00:04:54,227 There was plenty of everything-- jobs, security, laughs. 79 00:04:54,294 --> 00:04:56,263 America was in great shape, 80 00:04:56,330 --> 00:04:58,366 except for President William Taft. 81 00:04:58,432 --> 00:05:00,368 Was he a porker. 82 00:05:00,434 --> 00:05:04,538 He weighed as much as Teddy Roosevelt and half of William McKinley. 83 00:05:04,605 --> 00:05:07,541 Immigrants came from all over the world, 84 00:05:07,608 --> 00:05:10,043 looking for a better life. 85 00:05:10,110 --> 00:05:12,279 And over 97% of them... 86 00:05:12,346 --> 00:05:15,816 settled in a two-block area of New York City. 87 00:05:15,883 --> 00:05:18,719 There used to be a law called the McCoy Act of 1909. 88 00:05:18,786 --> 00:05:20,921 It said immigrants wanting citizenship... 89 00:05:20,988 --> 00:05:23,557 had to stay out of their apartments at least four hours a day... 90 00:05:23,624 --> 00:05:26,594 and walk the streets with hats on. 91 00:05:26,660 --> 00:05:30,130 Most immigrants didn't find the streets paved with gold. 92 00:05:30,197 --> 00:05:32,566 Instead, they found hard times. 93 00:05:32,633 --> 00:05:36,069 Nobody had it tougher than my mom, Mom Kelly. 94 00:05:36,136 --> 00:05:38,539 She was kind and sweet. 95 00:05:38,606 --> 00:05:41,942 She had a colorful way of putting things. 96 00:05:42,009 --> 00:05:46,414 The Lower East Side-- this really sucks. 97 00:05:48,015 --> 00:05:53,086 - I was just starting out in business. - Hey, kid, you got a paper? 98 00:05:53,153 --> 00:05:56,289 Hiya, Mom. Hiya, Johnny. 99 00:05:56,356 --> 00:05:58,258 Your pancreas feeling better? 100 00:05:58,325 --> 00:06:00,260 Don't worry about me. 101 00:06:00,327 --> 00:06:02,229 Just keep yourself warm. 102 00:06:02,295 --> 00:06:03,831 Thanks, Mom. 103 00:06:03,897 --> 00:06:05,298 Oh, God! 104 00:06:05,365 --> 00:06:07,835 It's the worst July in years. 105 00:06:07,901 --> 00:06:09,770 Go on upstairs. 106 00:06:09,837 --> 00:06:12,706 After I sell these, we'll celebrate your birthday. 107 00:06:12,773 --> 00:06:15,709 Ahh. You're my darling boy. 108 00:06:15,776 --> 00:06:17,778 Hey, kid, paper here. Yeah. 109 00:06:24,818 --> 00:06:28,288 All right. Tribune. Get your Tribune. 110 00:06:28,355 --> 00:06:30,323 Get your Tribune. 111 00:06:30,390 --> 00:06:32,292 [ Horn Honks ] [ Tires Screech ] 112 00:06:32,359 --> 00:06:36,063 [ Crash ] Aah! 113 00:06:38,466 --> 00:06:40,333 A lousy penny. Get your Tribune. 114 00:06:40,400 --> 00:06:42,436 This is my corner. 115 00:06:42,503 --> 00:06:45,272 Danny Vermin don't move for nobody, Kelly. 116 00:06:45,338 --> 00:06:47,140 Oh, yeah? Yeah. 117 00:06:47,207 --> 00:06:50,611 It's okay, Officer. I can handle this myself. 118 00:06:54,615 --> 00:06:56,517 Stop the car. I want to see this. 119 00:06:56,584 --> 00:06:58,519 Yes, sir, Mr. Dundee. 120 00:07:01,388 --> 00:07:03,190 Ha ha ha ha! 121 00:07:03,256 --> 00:07:04,892 And no hard feelings. 122 00:07:04,958 --> 00:07:07,628 You ain't seen the last of Danny Vermin. 123 00:07:09,463 --> 00:07:11,832 Hey, kid, come here. 124 00:07:14,735 --> 00:07:17,838 I like the way you handle yourself. 125 00:07:17,905 --> 00:07:19,473 Thanks, mister. 126 00:07:19,540 --> 00:07:22,743 Do you know who this man is? 127 00:07:22,810 --> 00:07:24,144 I give up. 128 00:07:24,211 --> 00:07:27,280 How'd you like to make $50? 129 00:07:27,347 --> 00:07:30,450 Do I have to break the law? 130 00:07:30,518 --> 00:07:32,720 If I broke the law, 131 00:07:32,786 --> 00:07:35,122 it would be like breaking my mother's heart. 132 00:07:36,256 --> 00:07:38,258 Okay, kid. 133 00:07:38,325 --> 00:07:40,260 But if you change your mind, 134 00:07:40,327 --> 00:07:42,930 I'll be at the Club 25. 135 00:08:00,280 --> 00:08:02,750 [ Baby Crying ] 136 00:08:07,721 --> 00:08:10,758 [ Heavy Breathing ] 137 00:08:18,365 --> 00:08:20,668 Dr. Magnus. How's my mother? 138 00:08:20,734 --> 00:08:22,736 It's her pancreas again. 139 00:08:22,803 --> 00:08:25,272 She'll need an operation immediately. 140 00:08:25,338 --> 00:08:27,675 How much will it cost? 141 00:08:27,741 --> 00:08:29,710 $49.95. This week only. 142 00:08:29,777 --> 00:08:32,713 Where can I get that much money? 143 00:08:32,780 --> 00:08:35,182 Knock over a gas station. 144 00:08:42,322 --> 00:08:43,857 Hiya, Tommy. 145 00:08:43,924 --> 00:08:45,258 Hi, Johnny. 146 00:08:45,325 --> 00:08:46,727 Hiya, Mom. 147 00:08:46,794 --> 00:08:49,663 You're a sucker for a left. 148 00:08:49,730 --> 00:08:51,865 Take a break. 149 00:08:51,932 --> 00:08:53,200 I can't. 150 00:08:53,266 --> 00:08:56,236 I'm a year behind on Mr. Stevenson's shirts. 151 00:08:56,303 --> 00:08:59,006 There's a new law against washing on your birthday. 152 00:08:59,072 --> 00:09:02,275 Gosh, Johnny, I really don't think that's a law. 153 00:09:02,342 --> 00:09:07,280 You won't find it in your law books because I just made it up. 154 00:09:07,347 --> 00:09:10,383 Look. He colored Oliver Wendell Holmes purple. 155 00:09:10,450 --> 00:09:12,352 Isn't that something? 156 00:09:12,419 --> 00:09:14,722 Only 6 years old. 157 00:09:14,788 --> 00:09:17,625 Your poor father would have been proud. 158 00:09:17,691 --> 00:09:20,193 He wanted you to be a lawyer. 159 00:09:20,260 --> 00:09:22,663 He could have used one. 160 00:09:22,730 --> 00:09:25,599 You'll make something of yourself, Tommy. 161 00:09:25,666 --> 00:09:28,101 I'll see that you do. 162 00:09:28,168 --> 00:09:32,205 No mother was ever blessed with two finer sons. 163 00:09:32,272 --> 00:09:34,041 Happy birthday, Mom. 164 00:09:34,107 --> 00:09:36,677 Bless the saints! An ashtray! 165 00:09:36,744 --> 00:09:40,280 I been thinking of taking up smoking. 166 00:09:40,347 --> 00:09:43,651 How does it feel to be 29? 167 00:09:43,717 --> 00:09:46,620 I only hope I reach 30. 168 00:09:46,687 --> 00:09:49,056 Are you all right, Mom? 169 00:09:49,122 --> 00:09:51,091 I'll be fine. Go back to work. 170 00:09:51,158 --> 00:09:55,128 Don't worry about me. I'll be all right. 171 00:09:59,733 --> 00:10:01,802 She needs an operation. 172 00:10:01,869 --> 00:10:05,272 If I broke the law, I'd break my mother's heart. 173 00:10:05,338 --> 00:10:07,307 $49.95. 174 00:10:07,374 --> 00:10:08,842 You want to make $50? 175 00:10:08,909 --> 00:10:11,278 I just hope I reach 30. 176 00:10:11,344 --> 00:10:13,781 I'll be at the Club 25. 177 00:10:13,847 --> 00:10:17,818 Sorry, Mom. It's the only way. 178 00:10:46,680 --> 00:10:49,049 No more nodding! 179 00:10:50,751 --> 00:10:52,786 Place your bets, please. 180 00:11:15,642 --> 00:11:17,677 Dundee's gang is here. 181 00:11:18,812 --> 00:11:21,214 What's that bastige want, huh? 182 00:11:27,387 --> 00:11:29,156 How's tricks, Moronie? 183 00:11:29,222 --> 00:11:32,192 What are you doing here, icehole? 184 00:11:32,259 --> 00:11:36,163 Can't a fellow enjoy a night out gambling? 185 00:11:36,229 --> 00:11:39,800 Don't bullshty me. Search him. 186 00:11:39,867 --> 00:11:43,871 We're clean. I don't bear no grudges, 187 00:11:43,937 --> 00:11:47,240 even though you've been muscling in on my territory. 188 00:11:47,307 --> 00:11:49,109 Why, Moronie? 189 00:11:49,176 --> 00:11:51,711 It's a free country, icehole. 190 00:11:51,779 --> 00:11:53,446 They're clean, boss. 191 00:11:53,513 --> 00:11:57,484 You and the rest of your bastiges can gamble, 192 00:11:57,550 --> 00:12:00,387 but don't try no fargin trick. 193 00:12:00,453 --> 00:12:04,091 Otherwise, you'll wind up with your bells in a sling. 194 00:12:07,027 --> 00:12:10,063 What a mouth on that guy! 195 00:12:11,664 --> 00:12:13,666 Place your bets, please. 196 00:12:13,733 --> 00:12:15,803 Place your bets. 197 00:12:23,143 --> 00:12:24,411 Hey, kid. 198 00:12:26,346 --> 00:12:27,815 Paper, mister? 199 00:12:33,353 --> 00:12:35,222 Here you go. 200 00:12:36,756 --> 00:12:38,691 Here you are, sir. 201 00:12:38,758 --> 00:12:40,227 Thanks, kid. 202 00:12:43,864 --> 00:12:47,567 Nobody move, and nobody will get hurt. 203 00:12:47,634 --> 00:12:49,837 All we want is Moronie's money. 204 00:12:49,903 --> 00:12:52,005 Go ahead, kid. 205 00:12:52,072 --> 00:12:54,574 You fargin sneaky bastige! 206 00:12:54,641 --> 00:12:57,610 I going to take your dwork! 207 00:12:57,677 --> 00:13:01,414 I going to nail it to the wall! 208 00:13:01,481 --> 00:13:05,485 I going to crush your boils in a meat grinder! 209 00:13:05,552 --> 00:13:07,921 I cut off your arms! 210 00:13:07,988 --> 00:13:10,958 I shove them up your icehole! 211 00:13:11,024 --> 00:13:13,360 Dirty sum un a batch! My own club! 212 00:13:15,028 --> 00:13:16,964 Mr. Dundee, watch out! 213 00:13:19,967 --> 00:13:22,402 Lock the fargin door! 214 00:13:22,469 --> 00:13:24,204 We got Dundee! 215 00:13:27,607 --> 00:13:30,343 Get that lousy kid! 216 00:13:30,410 --> 00:13:31,811 Oh! 217 00:13:38,018 --> 00:13:39,953 Get that kid! 218 00:13:40,020 --> 00:13:43,156 It's only a fargin kid! 219 00:13:43,223 --> 00:13:45,225 Get him! 220 00:13:45,292 --> 00:13:47,560 Give me a gun! Give me a gun! 221 00:13:51,865 --> 00:13:53,033 Next shooter. 222 00:13:53,100 --> 00:13:55,735 Kid's like a monkey. Get him! 223 00:13:55,802 --> 00:13:59,306 It's a fargin kid! Get him! 224 00:14:03,743 --> 00:14:06,479 Hell of an anniversary, Lou. 225 00:14:06,546 --> 00:14:10,183 I don't believe you guys! Get him or you all fired! 226 00:14:12,652 --> 00:14:14,687 No, no, no! 227 00:14:14,754 --> 00:14:16,556 Permesso. 228 00:14:16,623 --> 00:14:19,326 Say your prayers, icehole. 229 00:14:23,863 --> 00:14:25,498 Oh! 230 00:14:26,866 --> 00:14:28,301 Hold it. 231 00:14:28,368 --> 00:14:31,771 Why, you miserable corksucker! 232 00:14:31,838 --> 00:14:35,008 I gonna get you for this. 233 00:14:35,075 --> 00:14:38,878 Roman Moronie never forget a fargin face, kid. 234 00:14:38,946 --> 00:14:41,014 I'll get you. 235 00:14:50,890 --> 00:14:52,692 You okay, boss? 236 00:14:52,759 --> 00:14:56,329 Yeah. Thanks to this kid and this. 237 00:14:56,396 --> 00:14:58,165 Thanks a lot, kid. 238 00:14:58,231 --> 00:15:01,234 From now on, you're my boy. 239 00:15:01,301 --> 00:15:04,237 Yeah, kid, you really live dangerously. 240 00:15:04,304 --> 00:15:07,040 By the way, what's your name? Johnny. 241 00:15:07,107 --> 00:15:10,343 Johnny... Johnny Dangerously. 242 00:15:10,410 --> 00:15:13,813 I should've never picked that name. 243 00:15:13,880 --> 00:15:15,848 A name like that you got to live up to. 244 00:15:15,915 --> 00:15:18,051 Act tough. Put up a front. 245 00:15:18,118 --> 00:15:20,820 I got into a lot of fights. 246 00:15:20,887 --> 00:15:24,191 What's your last name? Binderhoff. 247 00:15:24,257 --> 00:15:26,626 Don't ever change that name. 248 00:15:26,693 --> 00:15:28,595 You'll stay out of trouble. 249 00:15:28,661 --> 00:15:31,264 Anyway, Mom got better. 250 00:15:31,331 --> 00:15:36,303 I didn't do any more jobs for the Dundee gang. 251 00:15:36,369 --> 00:15:40,373 I grew up your average, poverty-stricken teenager, 252 00:15:40,440 --> 00:15:43,376 thinking about girls, my hair, girls. 253 00:15:43,443 --> 00:15:45,378 [ Music Plays ] 254 00:15:59,592 --> 00:16:03,030 I've never seen anyone dance like that. 255 00:16:05,798 --> 00:16:08,001 Hi, Dr. Magnus. How's my mother? 256 00:16:08,068 --> 00:16:10,503 It's her thyroid, Johnny. What's wrong? 257 00:16:10,570 --> 00:16:13,006 We can't find it. We're gonna have to do a thyroid search. 258 00:16:13,073 --> 00:16:18,511 How much is that? You're in luck. This week, a special--$999. 259 00:16:18,578 --> 00:16:21,881 $999? 260 00:16:21,948 --> 00:16:23,783 Talk about bad luck. 261 00:16:23,850 --> 00:16:27,087 There was only one place I could get that much money. 262 00:16:27,154 --> 00:16:30,890 So I joined the Jocko Dundee mob full-time. 263 00:16:30,957 --> 00:16:34,761 Jocko was still at war with Roman Moronie. 264 00:16:34,827 --> 00:16:38,965 The years didn't soften Moronie. He continued to murder the English language... 265 00:16:39,032 --> 00:16:42,001 and anyone who got in his way. 266 00:16:42,069 --> 00:16:44,937 Moronie had rules for his gang. 267 00:16:45,004 --> 00:16:48,841 First, never park in his private space. 268 00:16:48,908 --> 00:16:51,744 The Dundee gang was more fun. 269 00:16:51,811 --> 00:16:53,813 We did illegal things, 270 00:16:53,880 --> 00:16:56,683 but we never bothered the public. 271 00:16:56,749 --> 00:17:00,787 Every Christmas, Jocko returned some cash to the community. 272 00:17:00,853 --> 00:17:02,855 Every chance I got, 273 00:17:02,922 --> 00:17:04,724 I returned to the old neighborhood. 274 00:17:04,791 --> 00:17:07,727 They looked up to me there like I was a folk hero. 275 00:17:07,794 --> 00:17:11,298 "I love Johnny" T-shirts. I love Johnny! 276 00:17:11,364 --> 00:17:14,767 Johnny, can I follow in your footsteps? 277 00:17:14,834 --> 00:17:19,439 Sure, kid. Here. It's burning a hole in my pocket. 278 00:17:19,506 --> 00:17:21,474 Look, Rosie, it's Johnny Dangerously. 279 00:17:23,243 --> 00:17:27,247 Mrs. Zimmer, everybody, over here. 280 00:17:30,583 --> 00:17:33,353 What did I tell you neighborhood people? 281 00:17:33,420 --> 00:17:36,089 Around here, you're Johnny Kelly, 282 00:17:36,156 --> 00:17:38,658 a law-abiding nightclub owner, 283 00:17:38,725 --> 00:17:41,794 not the notorious gangster, Johnny Dangerously. 284 00:17:41,861 --> 00:17:45,798 Sure, and I'm the pope. 285 00:17:45,865 --> 00:17:48,335 Hey, Pope. How'd you know? 286 00:17:48,401 --> 00:17:53,240 Johnny, everybody knows except your mother and your brother. 287 00:17:53,306 --> 00:17:55,208 And as far as we're concerned, 288 00:17:55,275 --> 00:17:57,644 nobody will say nothing. 289 00:17:57,710 --> 00:18:00,280 Thanks, Your Holiness. 290 00:18:00,347 --> 00:18:03,550 Build yourself a new gym at the Vatican. 291 00:18:03,616 --> 00:18:05,685 Ho ho ho ho! 292 00:18:05,752 --> 00:18:07,787 Oh! 293 00:18:07,854 --> 00:18:11,158 Ah, bless you, Johnny. 294 00:18:18,865 --> 00:18:21,368 [ Knock On Door ] 295 00:18:21,434 --> 00:18:22,702 Johnny! 296 00:18:23,836 --> 00:18:25,305 Hiya, Ma. 297 00:18:26,273 --> 00:18:29,742 How's my best girl? 298 00:18:29,809 --> 00:18:31,711 Watch that left, Ma. 299 00:18:31,778 --> 00:18:36,249 I love him, but someday I'm going to knock him on his ass. 300 00:18:38,851 --> 00:18:40,720 What you cooking, Ma? 301 00:18:40,787 --> 00:18:42,155 Beer. 302 00:18:42,222 --> 00:18:43,756 With noodles. 303 00:18:43,823 --> 00:18:45,692 Great idea. 304 00:18:48,261 --> 00:18:50,230 So, Ma, what's new? 305 00:18:50,297 --> 00:18:52,299 Me arthritis, that's new. 306 00:18:52,365 --> 00:18:56,703 One of the muscles in me calf is shriveling up. 307 00:18:56,769 --> 00:18:59,672 Also, I'm losing sensation on the left side of me face, 308 00:18:59,739 --> 00:19:02,842 which I think is the beginning of a neurological disorder. 309 00:19:02,909 --> 00:19:06,679 The rest of me is in the pink. 310 00:19:06,746 --> 00:19:09,482 You got to take better care of yourself. 311 00:19:09,549 --> 00:19:13,620 I don't want you doing other people's laundry. 312 00:19:13,686 --> 00:19:17,224 What are you sayin', give up me career? 313 00:19:17,290 --> 00:19:19,826 Maybe you ought to retire. 314 00:19:19,892 --> 00:19:22,195 Enjoy the golden years, Ma. 315 00:19:22,262 --> 00:19:24,331 Not do this. 316 00:19:26,733 --> 00:19:29,302 Son, I couldn't consider retiring, 317 00:19:29,369 --> 00:19:34,441 not so long as I can still give good laundry. 318 00:19:36,276 --> 00:19:38,278 Where's Tommy? 319 00:19:38,345 --> 00:19:41,781 Don't be talking to me about Tommy. 320 00:19:41,848 --> 00:19:43,483 Why not? 321 00:19:43,550 --> 00:19:47,086 Because I'm leaving law school. 322 00:19:47,153 --> 00:19:49,956 If this is some joke, I ain't laughing. 323 00:19:50,022 --> 00:19:54,461 I'm dropping out of law school so Sally and I can be married. You can't change my mind. 324 00:19:54,527 --> 00:19:56,329 Do you want this, Sally? 325 00:19:56,396 --> 00:19:58,865 I want whatever Tommy wants. 326 00:19:58,931 --> 00:20:01,200 He makes the decisions. 327 00:20:01,268 --> 00:20:04,103 Sally's place is in the home. 328 00:20:04,170 --> 00:20:06,239 I intend to support her. 329 00:20:06,306 --> 00:20:09,976 I'll do anything-- shine boots, drive a hack, blow glass, anything. 330 00:20:10,042 --> 00:20:12,479 Johnny, talk sense to him. 331 00:20:12,545 --> 00:20:15,748 Can't you see you're breaking your mother's heart? 332 00:20:15,815 --> 00:20:17,617 Why, Tommy? 333 00:20:17,684 --> 00:20:21,654 I can't say it in front of mom. 334 00:20:21,721 --> 00:20:26,293 Okay. I got some business to take care of. 335 00:20:26,359 --> 00:20:30,229 You meet me at my place-- oh, 10:00, all right? 336 00:20:30,297 --> 00:20:33,800 All right. You little muskrat. 337 00:20:35,134 --> 00:20:38,371 I'll see you, Sally. Good-bye. 338 00:20:38,438 --> 00:20:41,574 Ma, don't worry. I'll straighten everything out. 339 00:20:41,641 --> 00:20:45,077 Hey, Ma, what's this in your ear? 340 00:20:45,144 --> 00:20:46,613 $100? 341 00:20:49,816 --> 00:20:53,853 What can't you say in front of mom? 342 00:20:53,920 --> 00:20:54,921 Nothing, Mom. 343 00:20:54,987 --> 00:20:57,890 I know what you can't say. You want to get laid. 344 00:20:57,957 --> 00:21:00,427 Mom! You want to hump your brains out. 345 00:21:00,493 --> 00:21:03,430 Ba-boom! Ba-boom! Ba-boom! Ba-boom! 346 00:21:06,299 --> 00:21:07,834 Morning, Pat. 347 00:21:07,900 --> 00:21:09,268 Morning, Johnny. 348 00:21:09,336 --> 00:21:11,304 How's your dear mother? 349 00:21:11,371 --> 00:21:13,673 Much better. Thanks for asking. 350 00:21:13,740 --> 00:21:16,208 She's such a wonderful woman. 351 00:21:16,275 --> 00:21:18,311 Yes, she is. 352 00:21:18,378 --> 00:21:21,748 She's got the smile of an angel. 353 00:21:23,082 --> 00:21:28,355 * I love all the many charms about you * 354 00:21:28,421 --> 00:21:33,460 * Above all, I want my arms about you * 355 00:21:33,526 --> 00:21:36,228 * Don't be a naughty baby * 356 00:21:36,295 --> 00:21:39,599 * Come to mama, do * 357 00:21:39,666 --> 00:21:43,536 * My sweet embraceable * 358 00:21:43,603 --> 00:21:46,739 * You ** 359 00:21:46,806 --> 00:21:49,842 Oh, Johnny! Johnny's here! 360 00:21:49,909 --> 00:21:51,811 Johnny! 361 00:21:51,878 --> 00:21:54,881 Johnny, want to be my first? It's my turn. 362 00:21:54,947 --> 00:21:57,316 I'm not wearing a bra. 363 00:21:57,384 --> 00:21:59,318 That makes two of us. 364 00:21:59,386 --> 00:22:01,320 I'm a real blonde. 365 00:22:01,388 --> 00:22:03,390 Check it out Thursday. 366 00:22:03,456 --> 00:22:06,559 How do you do it? Mutual respect. 367 00:22:06,626 --> 00:22:09,295 Hey, who's the nightingale? 368 00:22:09,362 --> 00:22:10,763 Some dame. 369 00:22:10,830 --> 00:22:13,299 She flew in from Pittsburgh. 370 00:22:13,366 --> 00:22:14,601 Say, kid. 371 00:22:14,667 --> 00:22:17,236 What do they call you? 372 00:22:17,303 --> 00:22:19,171 Impressive. 373 00:22:19,238 --> 00:22:21,708 Her name is Lil Sheridan. 374 00:22:21,774 --> 00:22:23,075 Thanks. 375 00:22:25,011 --> 00:22:27,447 Lil Sheridan, huh? 376 00:22:27,514 --> 00:22:30,750 My name's Dangerously, Johnny Dangerously. 377 00:22:30,817 --> 00:22:34,421 Do you know your last name's an adverb? 378 00:22:34,487 --> 00:22:36,823 Hey, I like that. 379 00:22:36,889 --> 00:22:40,326 You got spirit, spunk, fire, verve. 380 00:22:40,393 --> 00:22:42,361 You got those. 381 00:22:42,429 --> 00:22:45,398 I like those on a woman. 382 00:22:45,465 --> 00:22:48,367 Gee. My heart's all a-flutter. 383 00:22:48,435 --> 00:22:50,403 I'll tell you what. 384 00:22:50,470 --> 00:22:53,372 Why don't you take my card? 385 00:22:53,440 --> 00:22:55,074 Enjoying yourself? 386 00:22:55,141 --> 00:22:57,076 You call me tomorrow. 387 00:22:57,143 --> 00:23:01,914 Don't be upset when you don't hear the phone ringing. 388 00:23:01,981 --> 00:23:03,382 Suit yourself. 389 00:23:03,450 --> 00:23:06,352 I hope this is helping your morale. 390 00:23:06,419 --> 00:23:08,387 That's the first time... 391 00:23:08,455 --> 00:23:11,323 I had to take that card back. 392 00:23:11,390 --> 00:23:13,860 I kind of like it. 393 00:23:23,002 --> 00:23:24,871 I'll be seeing you. 394 00:23:30,242 --> 00:23:34,346 Does the word "smitten" mean anything to anybody? 395 00:23:34,413 --> 00:23:35,948 Hey, Johnny. 396 00:23:36,015 --> 00:23:37,349 Hiya, Johnny. 397 00:23:37,416 --> 00:23:38,818 Hiya, Vito. 398 00:23:38,885 --> 00:23:41,688 Better cut down on that pasta, pal. 399 00:23:41,754 --> 00:23:45,257 I'm starting the Cambridge diet on Monday. 400 00:23:45,324 --> 00:23:47,660 Why are you so happy? 401 00:23:47,727 --> 00:23:50,963 I just met an angel. An absolute angel. 402 00:23:51,030 --> 00:23:52,999 You met Lil, huh? 403 00:23:53,065 --> 00:23:54,967 Sure did, Mr. Dundee. 404 00:23:55,034 --> 00:23:56,869 You see this card? 405 00:23:56,936 --> 00:24:00,006 This card has been to paradise. 406 00:24:00,072 --> 00:24:01,641 Johnny's in love. 407 00:24:01,708 --> 00:24:05,444 You remind me of me and the wife 20 years ago. 408 00:24:05,512 --> 00:24:08,815 Of course, Mae never looked like Lil. 409 00:24:08,881 --> 00:24:11,484 Now she looks like him. 410 00:24:12,685 --> 00:24:15,722 But what am I, a beauty? 411 00:24:15,788 --> 00:24:19,325 Dames are put on this Earth to weaken us, drain our energy, 412 00:24:19,391 --> 00:24:21,961 laugh at us when they see us naked. 413 00:24:22,028 --> 00:24:25,665 Johnny, meet two new members of the gang, 414 00:24:25,732 --> 00:24:27,900 Danny Vermin and Dutch. 415 00:24:27,967 --> 00:24:29,268 Hello, Johnny. 416 00:24:29,335 --> 00:24:31,170 Hiya, Danny. 417 00:24:31,237 --> 00:24:34,140 Danny and I used to fight. 418 00:24:34,206 --> 00:24:36,308 What happened to you? 419 00:24:36,375 --> 00:24:39,211 I fulfilled a lot of predictions. 420 00:24:39,278 --> 00:24:41,280 I've become a scumbag. 421 00:24:41,347 --> 00:24:42,849 Good, Danny. 422 00:24:42,915 --> 00:24:46,653 Many people never realize what they want to be. 423 00:24:46,719 --> 00:24:48,788 [ Knock On Door ] 424 00:24:53,826 --> 00:24:56,763 Delivery for Jocko Dundee. 425 00:24:56,829 --> 00:24:58,765 There's some postage due, 426 00:24:58,831 --> 00:25:01,901 but I'll take care of it. 427 00:25:01,968 --> 00:25:04,436 No problem. 428 00:25:04,503 --> 00:25:06,973 What's this? 429 00:25:18,384 --> 00:25:20,152 He sent a robot. 430 00:25:20,219 --> 00:25:24,190 "Dear bastiges, I hope I got some of you. 431 00:25:24,256 --> 00:25:29,328 "If not, I'll get you when I take over the Club 25. 432 00:25:29,395 --> 00:25:31,197 Love and kisses, Roman Moronie." 433 00:25:31,263 --> 00:25:32,732 We got to stop him. 434 00:25:32,799 --> 00:25:35,935 I got something to stop him. 435 00:25:36,002 --> 00:25:39,205 They made it for him special. 436 00:25:39,271 --> 00:25:41,741 It's an .88 magnum. 437 00:25:41,808 --> 00:25:44,944 It shoots through schools. 438 00:25:45,011 --> 00:25:49,315 Vermin, you got too much sugar in your diet. 439 00:25:49,381 --> 00:25:51,350 Put the gun away. 440 00:25:51,417 --> 00:25:54,721 Maybe I will and maybe I won't. 441 00:25:54,787 --> 00:25:56,756 Stash the rod, Danny. 442 00:25:56,823 --> 00:25:59,358 You shouldn't grab me, Johnny. 443 00:25:59,425 --> 00:26:01,861 My mother grabbed me once. 444 00:26:01,928 --> 00:26:03,429 Once. 445 00:26:03,495 --> 00:26:05,297 What will you do, Johnny? 446 00:26:05,364 --> 00:26:07,166 I'll think of something. 447 00:26:07,233 --> 00:26:11,303 Something clever. Something unexpected. 448 00:26:11,370 --> 00:26:13,773 Something subtle. 449 00:26:22,048 --> 00:26:24,984 This club is too fargin small. 450 00:26:25,051 --> 00:26:27,920 How big was the crowd last night? 451 00:26:27,987 --> 00:26:30,056 Packed. We had to turn them away. 452 00:26:30,122 --> 00:26:34,193 That's what I mean. We got to expand this fargin place. 453 00:26:36,295 --> 00:26:39,331 Knock down that wall, knock down that wall, 454 00:26:39,398 --> 00:26:41,600 and knock down that fargin wall. 455 00:26:43,770 --> 00:26:45,672 Now I'm really angry! 456 00:26:45,738 --> 00:26:48,607 This is fargin war! 457 00:27:00,753 --> 00:27:02,689 You must be Tommy. 458 00:27:02,755 --> 00:27:05,725 Uh... Come in. 459 00:27:05,792 --> 00:27:07,827 Johnny's expecting you. 460 00:27:09,729 --> 00:27:11,230 Follow me. 461 00:27:14,233 --> 00:27:15,702 Hello, Tommy. 462 00:27:18,337 --> 00:27:19,706 Oh! 463 00:27:19,772 --> 00:27:21,207 Tommy, hey. 464 00:27:21,273 --> 00:27:24,844 Have a seat there, you little muskrat. 465 00:27:26,746 --> 00:27:29,015 So, Tom... 466 00:27:29,081 --> 00:27:31,951 what's this bull fertilizer about you quitting law school? 467 00:27:32,018 --> 00:27:35,321 I haven't got the tits for it. 468 00:27:35,387 --> 00:27:37,223 I mean, the heart. 469 00:27:37,289 --> 00:27:41,327 Tommy, I want you to pay attention. 470 00:27:41,393 --> 00:27:44,663 I don't understand. You're tops in your class. 471 00:27:44,731 --> 00:27:47,900 You made the Law Review. Why get married now? 472 00:27:47,967 --> 00:27:51,838 Because if I don't get laid, I'll die. 473 00:27:51,904 --> 00:27:54,807 Laid! That's what this thing's about? 474 00:27:54,874 --> 00:27:57,676 I thought it was something serious. 475 00:27:57,744 --> 00:27:59,712 It is serious. 476 00:27:59,779 --> 00:28:02,782 I've tried going to bad girls, 477 00:28:02,849 --> 00:28:05,417 but I'm too clean-cut. 478 00:28:05,484 --> 00:28:09,756 How do you get laid in 1930? 479 00:28:09,822 --> 00:28:12,825 Do you think this is fun? 480 00:28:12,892 --> 00:28:16,362 Do you think this is a picnic? 481 00:28:16,428 --> 00:28:18,798 This is a bad habit. 482 00:28:18,865 --> 00:28:20,800 It's like drinking coffee. 483 00:28:20,867 --> 00:28:23,770 If I could quit, I would. 484 00:28:23,836 --> 00:28:25,805 Come in here, Tom. 485 00:28:25,872 --> 00:28:28,908 I want to talk to you. 486 00:28:32,178 --> 00:28:35,247 This is the most important reason... 487 00:28:35,314 --> 00:28:37,083 why you should wait. 488 00:28:37,149 --> 00:28:40,152 I want to show you something, 489 00:28:40,219 --> 00:28:44,190 something I think just might open your eyes. 490 00:28:48,795 --> 00:28:53,866 ** [ Fanfare ] 491 00:28:53,933 --> 00:28:56,335 Your testicles and you. 492 00:28:57,904 --> 00:28:59,872 Take a good look. 493 00:28:59,939 --> 00:29:02,341 These are the unlucky ones. 494 00:29:02,408 --> 00:29:07,847 These unfortunate souls are suffering from E.S.S.-- 495 00:29:07,914 --> 00:29:10,716 enlarged scrotum syndrome. 496 00:29:10,783 --> 00:29:13,786 For these poor devils, it's too late. 497 00:29:13,853 --> 00:29:16,322 But there is hope. 498 00:29:16,388 --> 00:29:18,958 Here, at the Atlanta Genital Institute, 499 00:29:19,025 --> 00:29:22,328 doctors are at work around the clock... 500 00:29:22,394 --> 00:29:24,596 to cure this dreaded affliction. 501 00:29:24,663 --> 00:29:27,934 Hi. I'm Dr. Zillman, 502 00:29:28,000 --> 00:29:32,939 and I'd like to talk to you about your testes. 503 00:29:33,005 --> 00:29:35,942 The human testicle is not unlike a balloon. 504 00:29:36,008 --> 00:29:39,979 Sometimes it is empty, and sometimes... 505 00:29:41,247 --> 00:29:43,182 it is full. 506 00:29:43,249 --> 00:29:44,984 And sometimes, 507 00:29:45,051 --> 00:29:47,186 it can explode. 508 00:29:47,253 --> 00:29:49,889 This may help you understand. 509 00:29:49,956 --> 00:29:53,092 Just remember that your testicles, 510 00:29:53,159 --> 00:29:55,995 when treated with love and care, 511 00:29:56,062 --> 00:29:59,999 will give you years of maintenance-free service. 512 00:30:02,835 --> 00:30:06,005 But if abused, well... 513 00:30:07,974 --> 00:30:10,009 the inevitable conclusion. 514 00:30:11,277 --> 00:30:15,014 So next time, do the smart thing. 515 00:30:15,081 --> 00:30:19,451 Don't let anything come between your testicles and you. 516 00:30:19,518 --> 00:30:21,053 Thank you. 517 00:30:26,558 --> 00:30:28,494 Where are you going? 518 00:30:28,560 --> 00:30:30,429 Back to law school. 519 00:30:33,165 --> 00:30:36,035 ** [ Band Music ] 520 00:30:43,042 --> 00:30:45,945 Let's hear it for the band. 521 00:30:46,012 --> 00:30:48,180 Johnny, great to see you. 522 00:30:48,247 --> 00:30:51,217 I got an announcement to make. 523 00:30:51,283 --> 00:30:54,686 When I die, hopefully in my bed... 524 00:30:54,753 --> 00:30:57,056 [ Laughter ] 525 00:30:57,123 --> 00:31:01,961 I want to go knowing that the Jocko Dundee mob... 526 00:31:02,028 --> 00:31:04,496 will continue with the traditions, 527 00:31:04,563 --> 00:31:06,365 with the high standards, 528 00:31:06,432 --> 00:31:10,869 that made us the New York Yankees of crime. 529 00:31:10,937 --> 00:31:12,871 [ Applause ] 530 00:31:12,939 --> 00:31:14,941 For that reason, 531 00:31:15,007 --> 00:31:18,877 I'm naming as my successor... 532 00:31:18,945 --> 00:31:20,879 Johnny Dangerously. 533 00:31:20,947 --> 00:31:23,749 [ Applause ] 534 00:31:23,815 --> 00:31:27,386 I want you to give a warm welcome... 535 00:31:27,453 --> 00:31:30,522 to a shy, retiring little lady... 536 00:31:30,589 --> 00:31:32,391 who's come to us... 537 00:31:32,458 --> 00:31:35,027 from a convent school in Pittsburgh, 538 00:31:35,094 --> 00:31:37,229 Lil Sheridan. 539 00:31:50,009 --> 00:31:53,379 * Over my undies trimmed in lace * 540 00:31:53,445 --> 00:31:57,216 * I slip on my black silk disgrace * 541 00:31:57,283 --> 00:32:00,987 * Cut so low, they'll raid the place * 542 00:32:01,053 --> 00:32:03,956 * I wanna dress dangerously * 543 00:32:04,023 --> 00:32:06,325 Yeah! * I need to be reckless * 544 00:32:06,392 --> 00:32:08,460 * I need to be daring * 545 00:32:08,527 --> 00:32:12,064 * I need to take chances and tempt my fate * 546 00:32:12,131 --> 00:32:14,100 * I need to be foolish * 547 00:32:14,166 --> 00:32:15,767 * Need to be crazy * 548 00:32:15,834 --> 00:32:19,205 * Before it's too late and I'm out of date * 549 00:32:25,844 --> 00:32:30,916 * I'll feed you sizzling steak and bootleg gin * 550 00:32:30,983 --> 00:32:34,420 * And chocolate cake till it's a sin * 551 00:32:34,486 --> 00:32:37,889 * We'll work it off and keep you thin * 552 00:32:37,956 --> 00:32:41,493 * I wanna eat dangerously * 553 00:32:41,560 --> 00:32:43,229 Woo! 554 00:32:43,295 --> 00:32:46,165 * Sizzlin', Sss * 555 00:32:47,499 --> 00:32:48,567 * Cheers * 556 00:32:53,672 --> 00:32:55,541 * I wanna * 557 00:32:55,607 --> 00:32:57,143 * Dangerously * 558 00:32:57,209 --> 00:32:59,178 * I need to be reckless * 559 00:32:59,245 --> 00:33:01,147 * I need to be daring * 560 00:33:01,213 --> 00:33:04,950 * I need to take chances and tempt my fate * 561 00:33:05,017 --> 00:33:06,818 * I need to be foolish * 562 00:33:06,885 --> 00:33:08,620 * Need to be crazy * 563 00:33:08,687 --> 00:33:12,591 * Before it's too late and I'm out of date * 564 00:33:15,961 --> 00:33:20,066 * I'm just a slave to my desire * 565 00:33:20,132 --> 00:33:24,270 * And not afraid to play with fire * 566 00:33:24,336 --> 00:33:28,307 * I'll fan your flame and get it higher * 567 00:33:28,374 --> 00:33:31,877 * I wanna live dangerously * 568 00:33:31,943 --> 00:33:34,513 * I wanna eat * 569 00:33:34,580 --> 00:33:36,115 * Dangerously * 570 00:33:36,182 --> 00:33:38,684 * I wanna love * 571 00:33:44,223 --> 00:33:49,795 * Dangerously ** 572 00:34:02,074 --> 00:34:04,009 There's Johnny. 573 00:34:04,076 --> 00:34:06,512 Oh, he's so cute! 574 00:34:16,722 --> 00:34:18,490 You're holding up traffic. 575 00:34:18,557 --> 00:34:21,660 I figure that song you sang... 576 00:34:21,727 --> 00:34:24,029 gave me the green light. 577 00:34:24,096 --> 00:34:26,064 You're off red, 578 00:34:26,132 --> 00:34:28,500 but you're still on amber. 579 00:34:28,567 --> 00:34:31,670 I hope that light changes soon... 580 00:34:31,737 --> 00:34:33,505 because my motor's running. 581 00:34:33,572 --> 00:34:36,074 Be careful you don't overheat. 582 00:34:36,142 --> 00:34:38,610 I'll tell you one thing. 583 00:34:38,677 --> 00:34:40,045 What's that? 584 00:34:40,112 --> 00:34:41,947 You sure can banter. 585 00:34:42,013 --> 00:34:46,985 Then I decided to leave Pittsburgh and come here to Chicago. 586 00:34:47,052 --> 00:34:49,655 Uh, Lil? Yeah? 587 00:34:49,721 --> 00:34:53,959 This ain't Chicago. We're in New York. 588 00:34:54,025 --> 00:34:56,094 You're kidding. 589 00:34:57,095 --> 00:34:59,064 Well, New York, Chicago... 590 00:34:59,131 --> 00:35:04,102 to a girl on her own, it's all the same. 591 00:35:05,937 --> 00:35:08,574 I figured mom and dad... 592 00:35:08,640 --> 00:35:11,042 didn't need me around anymore, 593 00:35:11,109 --> 00:35:13,011 not with 14 mouths to feed. 594 00:35:13,078 --> 00:35:15,581 Your folks had 14 kids? 595 00:35:15,647 --> 00:35:18,617 They ran a kennel. 596 00:35:18,684 --> 00:35:20,452 What about your folks? 597 00:35:20,519 --> 00:35:22,921 My mother raised us herself. 598 00:35:22,988 --> 00:35:26,325 I never knew my father or uncle. 599 00:35:26,392 --> 00:35:29,261 I kind of knew my grandmother. 600 00:35:29,328 --> 00:35:31,330 Didn't know my grandfather. 601 00:35:31,397 --> 00:35:34,466 Never knew any of my cousins. 602 00:35:34,533 --> 00:35:36,001 Any pets? 603 00:35:36,067 --> 00:35:38,069 We had a dog. 604 00:35:38,136 --> 00:35:40,038 He ran away when I was a kid. 605 00:35:40,105 --> 00:35:42,274 Never knew him. 606 00:35:49,114 --> 00:35:51,817 Where the hell are we? 607 00:35:55,587 --> 00:35:59,057 Johnny, I'm falling in a big way. 608 00:35:59,124 --> 00:36:01,059 You got company, kid. 609 00:36:01,126 --> 00:36:03,128 Where will we land? 610 00:36:03,195 --> 00:36:06,532 When we do, will our hearts break? 611 00:36:06,598 --> 00:36:09,635 There are answers to these questions, 612 00:36:09,701 --> 00:36:11,169 but first... 613 00:36:25,217 --> 00:36:27,586 Sounds like Johnny's getting laid. 614 00:36:30,689 --> 00:36:33,124 Moronie was still on the warpath. 615 00:36:33,191 --> 00:36:35,461 Even getting to work was an adventure. 616 00:36:36,728 --> 00:36:38,630 Be careful. 617 00:36:38,697 --> 00:36:42,501 There's not a bullet out there with my name on it. 618 00:36:45,671 --> 00:36:49,675 I couldn't stand it if something happened to you. 619 00:36:49,741 --> 00:36:51,610 Neither could I. 620 00:37:10,796 --> 00:37:12,731 One hippopotamus, 621 00:37:12,798 --> 00:37:14,132 two hippopotamus, 622 00:37:14,199 --> 00:37:15,667 three hippopotamus. 623 00:37:15,734 --> 00:37:16,835 Go! 624 00:37:16,902 --> 00:37:18,970 [ Gunfire ] 625 00:37:38,123 --> 00:37:39,558 Wait! 626 00:37:39,625 --> 00:37:41,527 Get him. 627 00:37:49,067 --> 00:37:50,469 Morning, Johnny. 628 00:37:50,536 --> 00:37:52,538 How's your precious mother? 629 00:37:56,342 --> 00:37:58,043 Hee hee! 630 00:38:02,548 --> 00:38:05,417 Whew. You been out there today? 631 00:38:05,484 --> 00:38:07,085 Pretty rough? 632 00:38:07,152 --> 00:38:09,521 Not as bad as yesterday. 633 00:38:09,588 --> 00:38:12,123 You'll feel better if you have a cookie. 634 00:38:12,190 --> 00:38:13,459 Thanks. 635 00:38:13,525 --> 00:38:15,627 All fixed, Mr. Dundee. 636 00:38:15,694 --> 00:38:17,028 Thanks, pal. 637 00:38:17,095 --> 00:38:19,030 Who's that guy? 638 00:38:19,097 --> 00:38:20,499 The plumber. 639 00:38:20,566 --> 00:38:23,001 My bathroom drain was stuck. 640 00:38:23,068 --> 00:38:27,439 Where's all this gangland warfare getting us, anyway? 641 00:38:27,506 --> 00:38:29,575 I want Moronie, 642 00:38:29,641 --> 00:38:34,580 and I'm not going to rest until I get him. 643 00:38:35,547 --> 00:38:38,517 Or until he gets you. 644 00:38:38,584 --> 00:38:42,020 Hey, hey, hey, hey, hey! 645 00:38:42,087 --> 00:38:43,489 Ow. 646 00:38:43,555 --> 00:38:45,657 Relax, Johnny. Relax. 647 00:38:45,724 --> 00:38:47,058 Come on. 648 00:38:47,125 --> 00:38:48,994 Heh heh heh! 649 00:38:49,060 --> 00:38:52,364 A year from now, we'll look back on all this... 650 00:38:52,431 --> 00:38:56,668 and we're gonna have one big laugh. 651 00:38:56,735 --> 00:38:58,537 Oh, boy. 652 00:38:58,604 --> 00:39:01,507 I really had to wee-wee. 653 00:39:01,573 --> 00:39:03,008 That's funny. 654 00:39:03,074 --> 00:39:07,012 This bathroom drain was never stuck before. 655 00:39:10,148 --> 00:39:11,950 Mr. Dundee! 656 00:39:12,017 --> 00:39:13,084 Wait! 657 00:39:18,089 --> 00:39:22,694 Have you got the number of that other plumber? 658 00:39:22,761 --> 00:39:24,129 Mr. Dundee-- 659 00:39:24,195 --> 00:39:26,197 Aah! Oh, my God! 660 00:39:26,264 --> 00:39:29,535 Moronie, what have you done to me? 661 00:39:29,601 --> 00:39:31,537 Now look, calm down. 662 00:39:31,603 --> 00:39:33,705 Why go on living? 663 00:39:33,772 --> 00:39:35,106 Don't panic. 664 00:39:35,173 --> 00:39:36,575 Calm down? 665 00:39:36,642 --> 00:39:40,178 I have my dork in my hand! 666 00:39:40,245 --> 00:39:42,714 It's not your dork. Look. 667 00:39:42,781 --> 00:39:44,182 Thank God. 668 00:39:44,249 --> 00:39:46,685 It's just the chain handle. 669 00:39:46,752 --> 00:39:47,753 Sure. 670 00:39:47,819 --> 00:39:49,788 Freddy, you're still here, 671 00:39:49,855 --> 00:39:52,157 you little baldheaded beauty. 672 00:39:52,223 --> 00:39:54,626 I thought I lost you. 673 00:39:54,693 --> 00:39:58,129 Johnny, this is a sign from above. 674 00:39:58,196 --> 00:40:00,131 You okay, boss? 675 00:40:00,198 --> 00:40:01,332 Johnny, 676 00:40:01,399 --> 00:40:04,169 I'm retiring before it's too late. 677 00:40:04,235 --> 00:40:06,237 You remember this? 678 00:40:06,304 --> 00:40:09,007 Take it. You're the boss now. 679 00:40:09,074 --> 00:40:10,542 Oh, no. 680 00:40:10,609 --> 00:40:13,512 I'm not ready for the responsibility. 681 00:40:13,579 --> 00:40:16,748 I'm ready. Forget it, Vermin. 682 00:40:30,996 --> 00:40:32,764 I was on top. 683 00:40:32,831 --> 00:40:34,800 Moronie and I had a truce. 684 00:40:34,866 --> 00:40:37,503 Lil and I were going strong. 685 00:40:37,569 --> 00:40:41,640 And Ma, between occasional transplants and bypasses, 686 00:40:41,707 --> 00:40:44,543 her health was improving. 687 00:40:44,610 --> 00:40:48,146 I was on top of the world. 688 00:40:48,213 --> 00:40:49,948 Great story, pops. So long. 689 00:40:50,015 --> 00:40:53,585 Wait. I'm getting to the sad part. 690 00:40:53,652 --> 00:40:57,589 Everything else in my life was going so well. 691 00:40:57,656 --> 00:41:01,627 I was about to face my greatest challenge. 692 00:41:10,235 --> 00:41:13,104 Tommy, we're so proud of you. 693 00:41:13,171 --> 00:41:15,173 We sure are, kid. 694 00:41:15,240 --> 00:41:18,544 I owe it all to you, Johnny. 695 00:41:18,610 --> 00:41:21,179 This calls for a picture. 696 00:41:21,246 --> 00:41:23,549 Wait. I'll get me camera. 697 00:41:23,615 --> 00:41:25,316 Hold this. 698 00:41:25,383 --> 00:41:28,053 Where the hell is that camera? 699 00:41:34,726 --> 00:41:37,929 Tommy, I want you to have something. 700 00:41:37,996 --> 00:41:39,898 "Kimball, Pritchert, and Williston?" 701 00:41:39,965 --> 00:41:42,968 Biggest law firm in the city. 702 00:41:43,034 --> 00:41:46,437 Call them. You'll find them receptive. 703 00:41:46,504 --> 00:41:49,407 Thanks, Johnny, but I've already decided. 704 00:41:49,474 --> 00:41:51,910 You'll be proud of me. 705 00:41:51,977 --> 00:41:54,846 I'm joining the District Attorney's office. 706 00:41:54,913 --> 00:41:58,149 Johnny, I'm going to dedicate my life... 707 00:41:58,216 --> 00:42:00,151 to fighting crime. 708 00:42:00,218 --> 00:42:02,087 Isn't that great? 709 00:42:02,153 --> 00:42:06,157 My brother, who I put through law school, 710 00:42:06,224 --> 00:42:08,126 is gonna be fighting-- 711 00:42:08,193 --> 00:42:10,228 Crime. crime. 712 00:42:14,232 --> 00:42:16,001 Mom, it's prohibition. 713 00:42:16,067 --> 00:42:19,504 Stop acting like a fag choir boy. 714 00:42:19,571 --> 00:42:21,206 Here. 715 00:42:21,272 --> 00:42:23,609 To me two darling sons, 716 00:42:23,675 --> 00:42:26,211 one a famous nightclub owner, 717 00:42:26,277 --> 00:42:28,013 the other a crime fighter. 718 00:42:28,079 --> 00:42:31,016 With a father like Killer Kelly, 719 00:42:31,082 --> 00:42:34,019 it's a miracle neither of you... 720 00:42:34,085 --> 00:42:36,922 became a piece-of-shit criminal. 721 00:42:36,988 --> 00:42:39,658 Maybe she was right. I decided to go legit. 722 00:42:39,725 --> 00:42:43,695 Then I got more bad news about mom. 723 00:42:43,762 --> 00:42:45,764 About your mom, John. What is it? How much? 724 00:42:45,831 --> 00:42:49,567 A blocked salivary gland--$7,500. 725 00:42:49,635 --> 00:42:51,069 Go ahead. 726 00:42:51,136 --> 00:42:54,439 It'll be good seeing her spit again. 727 00:42:54,505 --> 00:42:56,407 I returned to crime. 728 00:42:56,474 --> 00:43:00,411 Since I had the district attorney on our payroll, 729 00:43:00,478 --> 00:43:02,313 I wasn't worried about Tommy. 730 00:43:04,282 --> 00:43:06,685 I'm the new Assistant D.A. 731 00:43:06,752 --> 00:43:10,588 I'm ready to join the war against crime. 732 00:43:10,656 --> 00:43:12,590 The boss in? 733 00:43:12,658 --> 00:43:14,125 In there. 734 00:43:16,862 --> 00:43:19,530 Hi. Tommy Kelly reporting for work, sir. 735 00:43:19,597 --> 00:43:21,432 Welcome to the team. 736 00:43:21,499 --> 00:43:26,972 I'm proud to be on any team whose adversary is crime. 737 00:43:27,038 --> 00:43:30,441 That's just what I wanted to hear. 738 00:43:30,508 --> 00:43:34,980 That's why we scout law schools for young idealists. 739 00:43:35,046 --> 00:43:38,549 But why not ease into the job? 740 00:43:38,616 --> 00:43:40,585 Take a little vacation. 741 00:43:40,652 --> 00:43:43,588 A vacation? But what about crime? 742 00:43:43,655 --> 00:43:47,158 It'll be here when you get back. 743 00:43:47,225 --> 00:43:48,960 That's the trouble. 744 00:43:49,027 --> 00:43:51,596 Crime will always be here... 745 00:43:51,663 --> 00:43:54,532 unless something is done about it. 746 00:43:54,599 --> 00:43:57,635 But Tommy didn't go on vacation. 747 00:43:57,703 --> 00:43:59,871 He became a tireless crime fighter. 748 00:43:59,938 --> 00:44:02,908 He fought crime in the newspapers. 749 00:44:02,974 --> 00:44:06,511 He attacked it on the radio. 750 00:44:06,577 --> 00:44:08,980 He arrested every criminal in town. 751 00:44:09,047 --> 00:44:13,551 Then he turned his sights on my enemy, Moronie. 752 00:44:13,618 --> 00:44:18,724 That Roman Troy Moronie is responsible for the Mother's Day massacre, 753 00:44:18,790 --> 00:44:20,692 the Christmas Day slaughter, 754 00:44:20,759 --> 00:44:23,862 the Lincoln's Birthday mutilation, 755 00:44:23,929 --> 00:44:26,832 and the Groundhog's Day beheadings. 756 00:44:26,898 --> 00:44:31,102 My client wants to read a prepared statement. 757 00:44:31,169 --> 00:44:32,470 Go ahead. 758 00:44:32,537 --> 00:44:35,040 I would like to direct this... 759 00:44:35,106 --> 00:44:39,610 to the distinguished members of the panel. 760 00:44:39,677 --> 00:44:41,679 "You lousy corksuckers. 761 00:44:41,747 --> 00:44:45,183 "You have violated my fargin rights. 762 00:44:45,250 --> 00:44:48,053 "This sum un om botching country... 763 00:44:48,119 --> 00:44:52,023 "was founded so that the liberties... 764 00:44:52,090 --> 00:44:54,960 "of common patriotic citizens like me... 765 00:44:55,026 --> 00:44:57,595 "could not be taken away... 766 00:44:57,662 --> 00:45:00,131 "by a bunch of fargin iceholes... 767 00:45:00,198 --> 00:45:01,933 like yourselves." 768 00:45:02,000 --> 00:45:04,169 Thank you very much. 769 00:45:04,235 --> 00:45:06,071 [ Crowd Gasps ] 770 00:45:06,137 --> 00:45:08,439 What do you know about Benny the Hump, 771 00:45:08,506 --> 00:45:12,210 Roland Carpiti, and Izzy the Nose mean to you? 772 00:45:12,277 --> 00:45:13,845 Don't mean a thing. 773 00:45:13,912 --> 00:45:16,281 Recognize this? 774 00:45:16,347 --> 00:45:17,648 No. 775 00:45:17,715 --> 00:45:20,618 Your fingerprints are on this gun, 776 00:45:20,685 --> 00:45:23,621 which was used to kill everyone... 777 00:45:23,688 --> 00:45:25,957 in a building at 110 East 40th Street. 778 00:45:26,024 --> 00:45:28,393 Where do you get that? 779 00:45:28,459 --> 00:45:31,729 If a train left New York at 300 miles per hour, 780 00:45:31,797 --> 00:45:34,900 accelerated speed 15 miles per hour, 781 00:45:34,966 --> 00:45:38,937 and traveled a distance of 683 miles, 782 00:45:39,004 --> 00:45:42,107 what time would that train reach Chicago? 783 00:45:42,173 --> 00:45:44,776 That's a fargin silly question! 784 00:45:44,843 --> 00:45:48,113 When, sir? When would that train reach Chicago? 785 00:45:51,416 --> 00:45:56,021 This...this weed of crime that threatens to grow unchecked... 786 00:45:56,087 --> 00:45:59,024 and choke off this beautiful flower... 787 00:45:59,090 --> 00:46:02,060 which is our free, democratic society-- 788 00:46:02,127 --> 00:46:06,464 I never thought this radio stunt would catch on. 789 00:46:06,531 --> 00:46:11,436 The public sees him as a knight in shining armor. 790 00:46:11,502 --> 00:46:15,040 This goes through armor, through the victim, 791 00:46:15,106 --> 00:46:18,609 through the wall, through a tree outside-- 792 00:46:18,676 --> 00:46:21,646 Relax. Kelly has nothing on us. 793 00:46:21,712 --> 00:46:25,650 Maybe we should wait till he does, huh? 794 00:46:25,716 --> 00:46:28,686 We kill Kelly and we'll have trouble. 795 00:46:28,753 --> 00:46:32,891 If Jocko was in charge, Kelly would have cement loafers. 796 00:46:32,958 --> 00:46:35,393 I'm in charge, not Jocko. 797 00:46:35,460 --> 00:46:37,628 Got it? 798 00:46:37,695 --> 00:46:40,065 Talk sense to the kid. 799 00:46:40,131 --> 00:46:42,733 Get him to play ball. 800 00:46:42,800 --> 00:46:46,171 We'll appeal to his more practical side. 801 00:46:46,237 --> 00:46:50,675 While you're at it, buy yourself a second home. 802 00:46:50,741 --> 00:46:52,243 Thanks, Johnny. 803 00:46:52,310 --> 00:46:53,578 Sure. 804 00:46:55,780 --> 00:46:57,715 This gang's getting soft. 805 00:46:57,782 --> 00:47:00,785 By letting Kelly take us apart, 806 00:47:00,852 --> 00:47:03,788 we've become laughingstocks of the underworld. 807 00:47:03,855 --> 00:47:06,491 I'm embarrassed to tell people what I do. 808 00:47:06,557 --> 00:47:10,161 I say I'm a barber. I told somebody I was a male nurse. 809 00:47:10,228 --> 00:47:13,298 I'm ashamed to admit I'm a criminal. 810 00:47:13,364 --> 00:47:16,267 We got to do something about this. 811 00:47:16,334 --> 00:47:18,803 You fellas really disappoint me. 812 00:47:18,870 --> 00:47:21,639 Look around. What do you see? 813 00:47:21,706 --> 00:47:24,675 I'll tell you what I see. 814 00:47:24,742 --> 00:47:28,046 I see some guys doing pretty good. 815 00:47:28,113 --> 00:47:30,648 Manny, you got a sauna? 816 00:47:30,715 --> 00:47:33,218 Yeah, I got a sauna. 817 00:47:33,284 --> 00:47:34,719 All right. 818 00:47:34,785 --> 00:47:37,655 Ollie, don't you send your mother... 819 00:47:37,722 --> 00:47:39,624 to Norway every summer? 820 00:47:39,690 --> 00:47:41,092 Yeah, Johnny. 821 00:47:41,159 --> 00:47:44,662 Vito, how many hats do you own? 822 00:47:44,729 --> 00:47:46,697 Upwards around 180. 823 00:47:46,764 --> 00:47:50,201 180 hats. That's a lot of hats. 824 00:47:50,268 --> 00:47:51,669 Yeah. 825 00:47:51,736 --> 00:47:54,172 You never told me that. 826 00:47:54,239 --> 00:47:58,709 Tell me another gang that's got a dental plan. 827 00:47:58,776 --> 00:48:01,646 You know why we're so successful? 828 00:48:01,712 --> 00:48:03,081 Why, Johnny? 829 00:48:03,148 --> 00:48:05,116 Because we're diversified. 830 00:48:05,183 --> 00:48:08,353 Diversification, yes, sir. 831 00:48:08,419 --> 00:48:11,522 We're constantly exploring new areas of crime. 832 00:48:11,589 --> 00:48:14,692 We better because there's Japanese gangs... 833 00:48:14,759 --> 00:48:18,063 that will do it faster and cheaper. 834 00:48:18,129 --> 00:48:20,698 There's so much out there. 835 00:48:20,765 --> 00:48:23,734 You can find something you like. 836 00:48:23,801 --> 00:48:26,671 I like what I'm doing now. 837 00:48:26,737 --> 00:48:29,074 I enjoy giving whores work, 838 00:48:29,140 --> 00:48:31,109 loan sharking, planting bombs. 839 00:48:31,176 --> 00:48:34,912 These are a few of my favorite things. 840 00:48:34,980 --> 00:48:36,547 Sick. Dumb-ass. 841 00:48:39,217 --> 00:48:41,252 You missed, fuck face. 842 00:48:43,121 --> 00:48:45,190 All right, Vermin. 843 00:48:45,256 --> 00:48:49,094 You're not getting that back till you've matured. 844 00:48:49,160 --> 00:48:51,129 Aren't we touchy, Johnny? 845 00:48:51,196 --> 00:48:55,300 Something going on between you and Kelly? 846 00:48:58,136 --> 00:49:01,139 Don't hang me on a hook. 847 00:49:01,206 --> 00:49:03,841 My father hung me on a hook once. 848 00:49:03,908 --> 00:49:06,277 Once. 849 00:49:08,513 --> 00:49:09,714 [ Crash ] 850 00:49:09,780 --> 00:49:11,782 Come on, boys, I'm buying. 851 00:49:11,849 --> 00:49:13,851 Now you're talking. 852 00:49:13,918 --> 00:49:16,587 Hang in there, Vermin. 853 00:49:16,654 --> 00:49:21,126 There's something fishy with Johnny and that D.A. 854 00:49:21,192 --> 00:49:24,162 I'm gonna find out what it is. 855 00:49:39,177 --> 00:49:41,279 [ Doorbell Rings ] 856 00:49:43,181 --> 00:49:48,786 I've got enough evidence to put Johnny Dangerously where he belongs. 857 00:49:48,853 --> 00:49:52,690 We don't even know such a man exists. 858 00:49:52,757 --> 00:49:54,192 Until now. 859 00:49:54,259 --> 00:49:57,228 Sir, I have got conclusive evidence-- 860 00:49:57,295 --> 00:50:00,765 notarized depositions, tire prints, blood samples. 861 00:50:00,831 --> 00:50:02,633 I've got eyewitness accounts, 862 00:50:02,700 --> 00:50:05,203 murder weapons, fingerprints, recordings. 863 00:50:05,270 --> 00:50:07,172 Hold it. Hold it. Hold it, kid. 864 00:50:07,238 --> 00:50:09,640 It's flimsy. It's not enough. 865 00:50:09,707 --> 00:50:14,745 It'll never hold up, not in a court of law. 866 00:50:14,812 --> 00:50:16,614 Let's put this aside. 867 00:50:16,681 --> 00:50:20,251 We're here to socialize, not talk shop. 868 00:50:24,889 --> 00:50:27,758 Had enough milk-fed veal, Tommy? 869 00:50:27,825 --> 00:50:29,727 Yes, sir. Thank you. 870 00:50:29,794 --> 00:50:34,365 Can we get back to this damaging evidence on Johnny Dangerously? 871 00:50:34,432 --> 00:50:35,833 No. 872 00:50:35,900 --> 00:50:38,736 Tonight, I want to talk about... 873 00:50:38,803 --> 00:50:42,140 Tommy Kelly and his future. 874 00:50:42,207 --> 00:50:44,142 You're engaged, aren't you? 875 00:50:44,209 --> 00:50:47,712 Yes, to a fine and decent girl. 876 00:50:47,778 --> 00:50:50,081 We plan to marry soon. 877 00:50:50,148 --> 00:50:53,084 As soon as you can afford it. 878 00:50:53,151 --> 00:50:54,719 We'll manage. 879 00:50:54,785 --> 00:50:57,222 Oh, I'm sure you will. 880 00:50:58,889 --> 00:51:01,692 But a little help can't hurt. 881 00:51:03,161 --> 00:51:05,763 Let me show you something. 882 00:51:05,830 --> 00:51:08,032 [ Honk Honk ] 883 00:51:08,099 --> 00:51:10,067 [ Ding ] 884 00:51:10,135 --> 00:51:12,069 [ Ring-A-Ling ] 885 00:51:12,137 --> 00:51:14,572 It's time to play ball! 886 00:51:14,639 --> 00:51:18,643 Let's see what's in store for Tommy Kelly... 887 00:51:18,709 --> 00:51:20,711 if he plays ball. 888 00:51:20,778 --> 00:51:22,613 In a hurry, Sally? 889 00:51:22,680 --> 00:51:25,783 Use this time-saving microflame oven. 890 00:51:25,850 --> 00:51:29,019 Cook a turkey in under a day. 891 00:51:29,086 --> 00:51:31,922 In a rut, Tom? Get away! 892 00:51:31,989 --> 00:51:37,128 Take a trip around the world on us, twice, aboard the... 893 00:51:37,195 --> 00:51:40,698 [ Toot Toot ] S.S. Kelly. 894 00:51:40,765 --> 00:51:42,567 And when you return, 895 00:51:42,633 --> 00:51:46,103 move into your own little love nest. 896 00:51:46,171 --> 00:51:48,406 Plenty of extra closet space. 897 00:51:48,473 --> 00:51:50,908 Perfect for entertaining. 898 00:51:50,975 --> 00:51:54,212 And on those chilly winter nights, 899 00:51:54,279 --> 00:51:58,149 Sally can wrap herself up in this number. 900 00:51:58,216 --> 00:52:01,186 And on those hot summer nights, 901 00:52:01,252 --> 00:52:05,156 Sally can wrap herself up in ice. 902 00:52:05,223 --> 00:52:08,359 It's all yours, if you play ball. 903 00:52:10,728 --> 00:52:12,630 What do you say? 904 00:52:14,199 --> 00:52:17,602 I say I'll see you behind bars. 905 00:52:29,180 --> 00:52:31,182 [ Ring ] 906 00:52:31,249 --> 00:52:32,550 What's up? 907 00:52:32,617 --> 00:52:35,686 He didn't go for it. What now? 908 00:52:35,753 --> 00:52:37,154 I'll ask Johnny. 909 00:52:37,222 --> 00:52:40,024 Johnny, what will you do about Kelly? 910 00:52:40,090 --> 00:52:42,360 [ Mimicking Johnny ] "Kill him." He says kill him. 911 00:52:42,427 --> 00:52:46,797 I thought he'd feel that way, so I've taken care of it. 912 00:52:51,035 --> 00:52:53,238 ** [ Music ] 913 00:52:55,540 --> 00:52:58,409 * I'm a sentimental sap, that's all * 914 00:52:58,476 --> 00:53:00,511 * What's the use of trying not to fall * 915 00:53:00,578 --> 00:53:02,847 * I have no will, you've made your kill * 916 00:53:02,913 --> 00:53:05,216 * 'Cause you took advantage of me * 917 00:53:05,283 --> 00:53:06,917 * I'm just like an apple on a bough * 918 00:53:06,984 --> 00:53:08,486 * And you're going to shake me down somehow * 919 00:53:08,553 --> 00:53:10,120 * So what's the use She cooked my goose * 920 00:53:10,187 --> 00:53:11,021 * When she took advantage of me ** 921 00:53:11,088 --> 00:53:13,157 [ Music Plays Faster ] 922 00:53:13,224 --> 00:53:16,794 Oh, my God! 923 00:53:16,861 --> 00:53:18,696 Whoa! 924 00:53:18,763 --> 00:53:20,865 Aahhh! 925 00:53:20,931 --> 00:53:22,867 Oh, my God! 926 00:53:22,933 --> 00:53:24,569 Oh, my God! 927 00:53:29,874 --> 00:53:31,776 Which one's Tommy? 928 00:53:31,842 --> 00:53:33,711 Got me. 929 00:53:33,778 --> 00:53:35,780 Dr. Michael Hertzberg to surgery. 930 00:53:35,846 --> 00:53:37,248 This is him. 931 00:53:37,315 --> 00:53:39,784 He's got his father's eyes. 932 00:53:39,850 --> 00:53:41,719 Give me a pen. 933 00:53:42,887 --> 00:53:44,989 In case they move him. 934 00:53:48,326 --> 00:53:51,228 Hey, Ma. Is he going to-- 935 00:53:51,296 --> 00:53:53,197 I mean, will he-- 936 00:53:53,264 --> 00:53:55,300 Croak? No. 937 00:53:55,366 --> 00:53:59,236 Dr. Kaplan says he's going to be fine. 938 00:53:59,304 --> 00:54:01,205 We Kellys are tough. 939 00:54:01,272 --> 00:54:03,308 What happened? 940 00:54:03,374 --> 00:54:06,944 His brakes failed leaving the D.A.'s. 941 00:54:07,011 --> 00:54:09,013 His brakes? 942 00:54:09,079 --> 00:54:11,549 I smell a rat. 943 00:54:13,117 --> 00:54:15,520 Get yourself a cab, Ma. 944 00:54:15,586 --> 00:54:19,557 I got a little business to attend to. 945 00:54:21,158 --> 00:54:24,295 Dr. Hugo Carey, emergency. 946 00:54:24,362 --> 00:54:27,665 This is very nice, although unexpected. 947 00:54:27,732 --> 00:54:33,571 Well, Winston, you been on the take from us all these years. 948 00:54:33,638 --> 00:54:36,507 Just my way of saying thanks. 949 00:54:36,574 --> 00:54:38,843 That's real generous. 950 00:54:38,909 --> 00:54:40,578 You know... 951 00:54:40,645 --> 00:54:43,180 you've always seemed to me... 952 00:54:43,247 --> 00:54:47,184 to be more sensitive than the rest. 953 00:54:47,251 --> 00:54:50,588 We should spend some time together, 954 00:54:50,655 --> 00:54:54,024 say two weeks in Puerto Rico. 955 00:54:55,660 --> 00:54:57,595 It's a thought. It's a thought. 956 00:54:57,662 --> 00:55:00,765 I picked something up for you. 957 00:55:04,168 --> 00:55:06,637 John...John. 958 00:55:10,207 --> 00:55:12,643 A smoking jacket. 959 00:55:13,778 --> 00:55:15,245 Red. 960 00:55:15,312 --> 00:55:17,114 My favorite color. 961 00:55:17,181 --> 00:55:18,649 Oh. 962 00:55:24,188 --> 00:55:25,590 Mmm! Tasty. 963 00:55:25,656 --> 00:55:28,158 What is this we're drinking? 964 00:55:28,225 --> 00:55:30,160 Uh...read the label. 965 00:55:30,227 --> 00:55:32,663 I got to make a call. 966 00:55:35,232 --> 00:55:37,067 Malt liquor. Hmm. 967 00:55:39,236 --> 00:55:40,938 [ Galloping ] 968 00:55:44,008 --> 00:55:46,677 Aah! 969 00:55:56,821 --> 00:55:58,088 Yo! 970 00:56:08,232 --> 00:56:10,234 My God. 971 00:56:10,300 --> 00:56:14,439 My God, I can see. I can see! 972 00:56:39,296 --> 00:56:41,265 Hi, honey. I'm home. 973 00:56:41,331 --> 00:56:43,267 Johnny, you're early. 974 00:56:43,333 --> 00:56:45,970 That's all right, isn't it? 975 00:56:46,036 --> 00:56:47,472 [ Crash ] 976 00:56:47,538 --> 00:56:51,008 You never missed before. Is something wrong? 977 00:56:51,075 --> 00:56:52,910 [ Doorbell Rings ] 978 00:56:54,344 --> 00:56:56,013 Oh, hi, Johnny. 979 00:56:56,080 --> 00:56:57,882 Hi, Mrs. Capone. 980 00:56:57,948 --> 00:57:01,018 Could I borrow a cup of bullets? 981 00:57:01,085 --> 00:57:03,020 We're a little low. 982 00:57:03,087 --> 00:57:04,922 Al will be pissed. 983 00:57:04,989 --> 00:57:07,958 Maybe Al's gonna have to stay home tonight. 984 00:57:08,025 --> 00:57:09,527 Gee. 985 00:57:09,594 --> 00:57:12,329 You weren't very nice to her. 986 00:57:12,396 --> 00:57:14,031 Oh, no? 987 00:57:14,098 --> 00:57:18,569 When's somebody going to be nice to Johnny Dangerously? 988 00:57:18,636 --> 00:57:22,006 Look. My own brother's out to get me. 989 00:57:22,072 --> 00:57:25,009 That psycho Vermin's out to get him. The gang's getting antsy, 990 00:57:25,075 --> 00:57:28,946 and the Crime Commission is breathing down my neck. 991 00:57:29,013 --> 00:57:32,550 I hope that's for a small grownup. 992 00:57:32,617 --> 00:57:35,119 Nah. Just wishful thinking. 993 00:57:35,185 --> 00:57:37,087 Ah, maybe someday, kid. 994 00:57:37,154 --> 00:57:39,056 When, Johnny? 995 00:57:39,123 --> 00:57:44,629 When are we going to stop running and start living? 996 00:57:44,695 --> 00:57:48,132 With Sally and Tommy getting hitched tomorrow, 997 00:57:48,198 --> 00:57:50,568 it got me thinking. 998 00:57:50,635 --> 00:57:53,538 I got an old-fashioned streak. 999 00:57:53,604 --> 00:57:56,006 I want a normal life. 1000 00:57:56,073 --> 00:57:59,544 Johnny Dangerously can't live a normal life. 1001 00:57:59,610 --> 00:58:02,012 It ain't in the cards. 1002 00:58:02,079 --> 00:58:05,650 People like me, we're like shooting stars. 1003 00:58:05,716 --> 00:58:10,020 We cross the sky, burning hot for one moment, 1004 00:58:10,087 --> 00:58:13,624 and then we plunge to Earth, disappear. 1005 00:58:13,691 --> 00:58:17,394 Jesus Christ. I'm starting to upset myself. 1006 00:58:17,461 --> 00:58:21,065 Johnny, it doesn't have to be that way. 1007 00:58:21,131 --> 00:58:23,100 We can change. 1008 00:58:23,167 --> 00:58:25,069 I don't know, Lil. 1009 00:58:25,135 --> 00:58:27,004 Dare we dream? 1010 00:58:28,138 --> 00:58:29,506 Yeah. 1011 00:58:29,574 --> 00:58:31,508 Hanging curtains, 1012 00:58:31,576 --> 00:58:33,544 ironing shirts. 1013 00:58:33,611 --> 00:58:35,546 Yeah. Car pools, PTA. 1014 00:58:35,613 --> 00:58:37,514 Sharing a casserole recipe. 1015 00:58:37,582 --> 00:58:39,550 Putting up shelf paper. 1016 00:58:39,617 --> 00:58:41,986 Johnny, I love shelf paper. 1017 00:58:42,052 --> 00:58:45,155 A little house, white picket fence. 1018 00:58:45,222 --> 00:58:47,992 Kids and dogs in the yard. 1019 00:58:48,058 --> 00:58:51,629 Saying hi to a neighbor named Fred. 1020 00:58:51,696 --> 00:58:55,733 Maybe there is a rainbow for us out there. 1021 00:58:55,800 --> 00:58:58,736 Sure, me and Lil had dreams. 1022 00:58:58,803 --> 00:59:01,739 But when you're in crime, kid, dreams don't always come true. 1023 00:59:08,646 --> 00:59:10,114 Follow him. 1024 00:59:18,322 --> 00:59:21,225 Park it in this slot here. 1025 00:59:21,291 --> 00:59:23,060 It's for the handicapped. 1026 00:59:23,127 --> 00:59:26,130 I am handicapped. I'm psychotic. 1027 00:59:29,634 --> 00:59:32,837 I now pronounce you man and wife. 1028 00:59:32,903 --> 00:59:35,305 You may kiss the bride. 1029 00:59:41,545 --> 00:59:44,481 You're like a daughter to me. 1030 00:59:44,548 --> 00:59:47,384 I want to share something with you. 1031 00:59:47,451 --> 00:59:49,019 What's that? 1032 00:59:49,086 --> 00:59:50,988 I go both ways. 1033 00:59:51,055 --> 00:59:52,923 Oh. 1034 01:00:00,898 --> 01:00:03,000 I'm glad we waited. 1035 01:00:03,067 --> 01:00:03,834 Yes. 1036 01:00:03,901 --> 01:00:06,003 I can't wait anymore. 1037 01:00:06,070 --> 01:00:07,437 Okay, where? 1038 01:00:07,504 --> 01:00:09,339 Some place real close. 1039 01:00:30,227 --> 01:00:34,231 Tommy's excited, but does he know about foreplay? 1040 01:00:34,298 --> 01:00:36,200 He'll figure it out. 1041 01:00:36,266 --> 01:00:40,237 When will you follow your brother's example, Johnny Kelly? 1042 01:00:40,304 --> 01:00:42,740 Brothers. Ha ha ha! 1043 01:00:43,741 --> 01:00:46,143 I knew there was something. 1044 01:00:48,045 --> 01:00:51,015 Oh, leave your face right there. 1045 01:00:51,849 --> 01:00:53,617 How do you like that? 1046 01:00:53,684 --> 01:00:56,353 Johnny Dangerously is Tommy Kelly's brother. 1047 01:00:56,420 --> 01:00:58,055 What? 1048 01:00:58,122 --> 01:01:01,025 Dangerously is the D.A.'s brother. 1049 01:01:01,091 --> 01:01:03,393 Ha ha ha! 1050 01:01:08,565 --> 01:01:11,368 That's it? You little shit! 1051 01:01:11,435 --> 01:01:14,972 * Say hello to Jesus * 1052 01:01:15,039 --> 01:01:19,543 * Take Mr. Jesus by the hand ** 1053 01:01:19,609 --> 01:01:22,880 Hallelujah! [ Crash ] 1054 01:01:24,614 --> 01:01:27,718 We were waiting in the car. 1055 01:01:27,785 --> 01:01:30,855 I wondered what happened to my brother. 1056 01:01:30,921 --> 01:01:34,258 I'm Johnny Kelly's brother, not Johnny Dangerously's. 1057 01:01:34,324 --> 01:01:38,963 Just a matter of time, wasn't it, kid? 1058 01:01:39,029 --> 01:01:41,398 Listen. Just don't tell Ma. 1059 01:01:41,465 --> 01:01:44,068 When I put you behind bars, 1060 01:01:44,134 --> 01:01:48,839 your picture will be in every newspaper in this country! 1061 01:01:48,906 --> 01:01:51,075 Why, Johnny? Why? 1062 01:01:51,141 --> 01:01:56,580 Maybe it's because that dealer in the sky shuffles the cards... 1063 01:01:56,646 --> 01:01:59,984 and we just play what we're dealt. 1064 01:02:00,050 --> 01:02:02,552 It's against the law to gamble! 1065 01:02:02,619 --> 01:02:04,121 Christ. 1066 01:02:04,188 --> 01:02:06,556 I took an oath to fight crime. 1067 01:02:06,623 --> 01:02:08,993 I can't go against my brother. 1068 01:02:09,059 --> 01:02:11,395 We'll settle this with our fists. 1069 01:02:11,461 --> 01:02:13,230 Whoa! Wait a minute! 1070 01:02:13,297 --> 01:02:16,633 You can't fight me. I'm too good. 1071 01:02:16,700 --> 01:02:18,568 I'll take my chances. 1072 01:02:18,635 --> 01:02:20,204 Okay. 1073 01:02:20,270 --> 01:02:22,606 I win, you quit. 1074 01:02:22,672 --> 01:02:25,209 You win, I quit. 1075 01:02:25,275 --> 01:02:26,743 All right. 1076 01:02:34,985 --> 01:02:37,087 Johnny, take a dive. 1077 01:02:39,589 --> 01:02:41,025 Oh! 1078 01:02:45,062 --> 01:02:48,933 I didn't know you packed such a wallop. 1079 01:02:48,999 --> 01:02:50,901 All right, Tom, you win. 1080 01:02:50,968 --> 01:02:53,003 I'm going legit. 1081 01:02:53,070 --> 01:02:55,906 Gee, thanks, Johnny. 1082 01:02:57,141 --> 01:02:58,408 Hey! 1083 01:02:58,475 --> 01:03:00,444 All right! 1084 01:03:04,448 --> 01:03:06,016 [ Coughing ] 1085 01:03:06,083 --> 01:03:09,186 This time, I really was going legit. 1086 01:03:09,253 --> 01:03:12,489 All I had to do was make the gang understand. 1087 01:03:15,459 --> 01:03:17,394 [ Bang ] 1088 01:03:17,461 --> 01:03:19,496 Who did that? 1089 01:03:19,563 --> 01:03:22,566 Aw, sorry. Did I get you? 1090 01:03:22,632 --> 01:03:24,534 You ruined the jacket. 1091 01:03:24,601 --> 01:03:26,971 Aw! See? 1092 01:03:27,037 --> 01:03:29,106 When will we tell the boys about Johnny? 1093 01:03:29,173 --> 01:03:34,244 As soon as he gets here. I wanna see the look on his face. 1094 01:03:34,311 --> 01:03:37,581 [ Coughing ] 1095 01:03:40,217 --> 01:03:43,220 You're not doing yourself any good. 1096 01:03:43,287 --> 01:03:48,258 And for you kids out there who are thinking about smoking, 1097 01:03:48,325 --> 01:03:49,726 don't start. 1098 01:03:49,793 --> 01:03:52,162 And if you started, stop. 1099 01:03:52,229 --> 01:03:55,132 Smoking don't make you look tough. 1100 01:03:55,199 --> 01:03:57,767 It makes you look stupid. 1101 01:03:57,834 --> 01:04:01,105 Put chewing gum in your mouth instead. 1102 01:04:01,171 --> 01:04:03,207 That's what Johnny does. 1103 01:04:03,273 --> 01:04:09,213 Smoking is the worst thing you can do to your body. 1104 01:04:09,279 --> 01:04:11,248 Huh uh ya! 1105 01:04:11,315 --> 01:04:12,782 See? 1106 01:04:12,849 --> 01:04:15,185 Hey, Johnny, let's have it. 1107 01:04:15,252 --> 01:04:18,388 I'll be late for target practice. 1108 01:04:18,455 --> 01:04:20,824 There's an opera letting out. 1109 01:04:20,891 --> 01:04:22,292 All right. 1110 01:04:22,359 --> 01:04:24,962 - Johnny Dangerously's going legit. - Le what? 1111 01:04:25,029 --> 01:04:27,331 Legit. Le why? 1112 01:04:27,397 --> 01:04:30,767 Because Johnny Dangerously is Johnny Kelly, 1113 01:04:30,834 --> 01:04:32,970 D.A. Tommy Kelly's brother. 1114 01:04:37,975 --> 01:04:40,177 Johnny, is this true? 1115 01:04:40,244 --> 01:04:43,047 I don't know how to react. 1116 01:04:43,113 --> 01:04:46,716 Yeah, kid, it is true. 1117 01:04:46,783 --> 01:04:49,053 Tommy Kelly is my brother. 1118 01:04:49,119 --> 01:04:51,121 I'm proud of him. 1119 01:04:51,188 --> 01:04:53,723 Sure. You worked with him, 1120 01:04:53,790 --> 01:04:56,093 helping him in his career. 1121 01:04:56,160 --> 01:04:58,695 Now that he's on top, 1122 01:04:58,762 --> 01:05:01,731 you're running out on us. 1123 01:05:01,798 --> 01:05:04,668 You don't care about crime. 1124 01:05:04,734 --> 01:05:06,103 That's right. 1125 01:05:06,170 --> 01:05:08,572 I don't care about crime? 1126 01:05:08,638 --> 01:05:13,177 I've been devoted to crime since I was 12. 1127 01:05:13,243 --> 01:05:17,681 I think we ought to enjoy what we got. 1128 01:05:17,747 --> 01:05:19,749 We got plenty. 1129 01:05:19,816 --> 01:05:22,586 I'm closing this store for good. 1130 01:05:22,652 --> 01:05:26,123 Well, I'm reopening it under new management. 1131 01:05:26,190 --> 01:05:28,158 Oh, no, you're not. 1132 01:05:28,225 --> 01:05:32,196 You don't have the keys, and I do. 1133 01:05:32,262 --> 01:05:35,732 I'm giving them to the crime commissioner. 1134 01:05:35,799 --> 01:05:38,168 And us with them, huh? 1135 01:05:38,235 --> 01:05:41,305 I knew it. He's turning squealer. 1136 01:05:41,371 --> 01:05:43,207 You know, 1137 01:05:43,273 --> 01:05:46,310 I'm bored with slapping you around. 1138 01:05:46,376 --> 01:05:48,645 Bores me. 1139 01:05:50,814 --> 01:05:52,749 Don't worry, fellas. 1140 01:05:52,816 --> 01:05:55,752 You guys are in the clear. 1141 01:05:55,819 --> 01:05:57,721 It's me they're after. 1142 01:05:57,787 --> 01:05:59,556 [ Coughing ] 1143 01:06:02,326 --> 01:06:05,662 Dirty Jew, shanty nigger, white trash bastard! 1144 01:06:05,729 --> 01:06:09,666 Go ahead! Walk all over the little beggar! 1145 01:06:23,913 --> 01:06:25,815 Commissioner, 1146 01:06:25,882 --> 01:06:29,019 there's the evidence against me, just like I promised. 1147 01:06:29,086 --> 01:06:32,922 Use it. I'm ready to pay my debt. 1148 01:06:32,989 --> 01:06:34,724 Hey, 1149 01:06:34,791 --> 01:06:36,826 how about a thank you? 1150 01:06:36,893 --> 01:06:40,497 Hey, how about me getting out of here? 1151 01:06:40,564 --> 01:06:43,533 Hey, how about me getting knocked out? 1152 01:06:56,080 --> 01:06:59,749 Hey, Johnny, I'd love to stick around, see how this turns out, 1153 01:06:59,816 --> 01:07:02,752 but I got a store to open. 1154 01:07:12,096 --> 01:07:15,165 Ha ha ha! 1155 01:07:18,602 --> 01:07:21,671 You lousy Wop, Slovak, Chink, Jap, 1156 01:07:21,738 --> 01:07:23,107 Polack, Kraut, fags! 1157 01:07:23,173 --> 01:07:25,509 Hiya, doll. What's your name? 1158 01:07:25,575 --> 01:07:29,012 Mary Margaret Katherine Danine. 1159 01:07:29,079 --> 01:07:30,914 How'd you like to make some money? 1160 01:07:30,980 --> 01:07:33,250 One at a time or together? 1161 01:07:33,317 --> 01:07:37,387 How much to clean 708 and forget you saw us? 1162 01:07:37,454 --> 01:07:39,789 $17,000. 1163 01:07:39,856 --> 01:07:42,559 All right, 17 grand it is. 1164 01:07:42,626 --> 01:07:46,062 Forget we ever gave you this money. 1165 01:07:46,130 --> 01:07:48,064 What money? 1166 01:07:48,132 --> 01:07:50,200 That-a girl. 1167 01:07:53,170 --> 01:07:55,004 Johnny! Johnny! 1168 01:07:55,071 --> 01:07:57,674 One at a time, boys. 1169 01:07:57,741 --> 01:07:59,576 Did you do it? 1170 01:07:59,643 --> 01:08:02,679 You know better than to ask that. 1171 01:08:02,746 --> 01:08:04,581 Explain the gun. 1172 01:08:04,648 --> 01:08:08,185 I been framed like the Mona Lisa. 1173 01:08:08,252 --> 01:08:11,121 Why were you seeing the commissioner? 1174 01:08:11,188 --> 01:08:13,056 I was going legit. 1175 01:08:13,123 --> 01:08:14,158 Le what? 1176 01:08:14,224 --> 01:08:15,859 Legit. As in legitimate. 1177 01:08:15,925 --> 01:08:17,127 Oh. Oh. 1178 01:08:17,194 --> 01:08:19,263 How about a picture? 1179 01:08:19,329 --> 01:08:23,133 Sure. It's the first picture of Johnny Dangerously, 1180 01:08:23,200 --> 01:08:26,069 so make it a good one. 1181 01:08:26,136 --> 01:08:27,437 Great. 1182 01:08:27,504 --> 01:08:28,738 Thanks. 1183 01:08:28,805 --> 01:08:30,640 All right. Thank you. 1184 01:08:35,245 --> 01:08:37,247 Empty your pockets, Johnny. 1185 01:08:43,753 --> 01:08:44,888 Wait a minute. 1186 01:08:44,954 --> 01:08:47,791 I can't find my cigarette case. 1187 01:08:47,857 --> 01:08:49,726 Maybe it's in another suit. 1188 01:08:49,793 --> 01:08:51,761 I don't think... 1189 01:08:51,828 --> 01:08:54,164 Your car. No. 1190 01:08:54,231 --> 01:08:56,800 Maybe it's on the sink. 1191 01:08:56,866 --> 01:08:59,603 No. It's my good luck piece. 1192 01:08:59,669 --> 01:09:03,139 Whoever has it bumped off the commissioner. 1193 01:09:04,107 --> 01:09:05,642 Excuse me. 1194 01:09:05,709 --> 01:09:09,246 Johnny, I brought your bail money. 1195 01:09:09,313 --> 01:09:12,516 - [ Whistles ] - I hate to disappoint you. 1196 01:09:12,582 --> 01:09:14,884 Johnny's being held without bail. 1197 01:09:14,951 --> 01:09:16,853 By whose orders? 1198 01:09:16,920 --> 01:09:18,922 The man who's prosecuting-- 1199 01:09:18,988 --> 01:09:20,890 the D.A. himself. 1200 01:09:22,659 --> 01:09:26,162 This is what you call going legit? 1201 01:09:26,230 --> 01:09:29,266 I swear, I been set up. 1202 01:09:29,333 --> 01:09:33,203 Find the cigarette case, you'll find the murderer. 1203 01:09:33,270 --> 01:09:35,472 There are a million cigarette cases. 1204 01:09:35,539 --> 01:09:38,542 Only one has a bullet dent and smells like gum. 1205 01:09:38,608 --> 01:09:40,577 Don't say anything until you get a lawyer. 1206 01:09:40,644 --> 01:09:43,713 I can handle my own brother. 1207 01:09:43,780 --> 01:09:45,749 You and he-- 1208 01:09:45,815 --> 01:09:47,784 Me and him's brothers. 1209 01:09:47,851 --> 01:09:49,886 We were brothers. 1210 01:09:49,953 --> 01:09:51,154 Brothers! 1211 01:09:51,221 --> 01:09:53,156 Hey, wait, I'll go! 1212 01:09:53,223 --> 01:09:55,559 Get out of my way! 1213 01:09:56,926 --> 01:09:58,662 Yo! 1214 01:10:05,269 --> 01:10:07,136 Is that the city edition? 1215 01:10:07,203 --> 01:10:08,638 What? 1216 01:10:08,705 --> 01:10:12,141 I said, is that the city edition? 1217 01:10:12,208 --> 01:10:13,777 Oh, no. 1218 01:10:13,843 --> 01:10:15,779 Son of a bitch. 1219 01:10:15,845 --> 01:10:17,681 Now I'm deaf! 1220 01:10:26,222 --> 01:10:27,757 He's guilty. 1221 01:10:27,824 --> 01:10:29,158 He's guilty. 1222 01:10:29,225 --> 01:10:30,760 Guilty. 1223 01:10:30,827 --> 01:10:32,296 Aah! 1224 01:10:35,365 --> 01:10:36,966 Mrs. Kelly. 1225 01:10:37,033 --> 01:10:39,803 Get me from me best side. 1226 01:10:39,869 --> 01:10:41,805 Got anything to say? 1227 01:10:41,871 --> 01:10:43,673 I got mixed feelings-- 1228 01:10:43,740 --> 01:10:46,776 thrilled for Tommy, sad for Johnny. 1229 01:10:46,843 --> 01:10:48,177 Mr. Kelly. 1230 01:10:48,244 --> 01:10:49,713 No comment. 1231 01:10:49,779 --> 01:10:53,717 This is the toughest thing I've ever done. 1232 01:10:56,286 --> 01:10:58,254 Nice work, Mr. D.A. 1233 01:10:58,322 --> 01:11:00,690 My name is Danny Vermin. 1234 01:11:00,757 --> 01:11:03,727 I was associated with your brother. 1235 01:11:03,793 --> 01:11:08,332 Thank you for sending him to the hot seat. 1236 01:11:09,265 --> 01:11:10,667 Ha ha ha! 1237 01:11:10,734 --> 01:11:13,337 Watch. Johnny taught me this. 1238 01:11:14,604 --> 01:11:15,705 Aah! 1239 01:11:15,772 --> 01:11:19,309 You shouldn't kick me in the balls. 1240 01:11:19,376 --> 01:11:23,212 My sister kicked me in the balls once. 1241 01:11:23,279 --> 01:11:25,615 Look, Mom. 1242 01:11:25,682 --> 01:11:27,451 It's Johnny's cigarette case. 1243 01:11:27,517 --> 01:11:30,119 The one he was talking about. 1244 01:11:30,186 --> 01:11:31,621 Give me that. 1245 01:11:31,688 --> 01:11:34,157 It's my brother's cigarette case. 1246 01:11:34,223 --> 01:11:36,159 Johnny didn't do it. 1247 01:11:36,225 --> 01:11:38,194 I'll get you, Vermin, 1248 01:11:38,261 --> 01:11:40,897 if it's the last thing I do. 1249 01:11:40,964 --> 01:11:44,668 It just might be, Mr. D.A. 1250 01:11:47,236 --> 01:11:49,238 Johnny ain't guilty, 1251 01:11:49,305 --> 01:11:53,076 and you sent him to the big house. 1252 01:12:01,885 --> 01:12:04,488 Johnny, it's an honor to have you on death row. 1253 01:12:04,554 --> 01:12:07,223 Don't be silly. The pleasure's all mine. 1254 01:12:07,290 --> 01:12:11,194 Hi, Pop. Still here, huh? You bet. 1255 01:12:11,260 --> 01:12:13,597 Tough break. John. 1256 01:12:13,663 --> 01:12:16,232 How the hell are you? 1257 01:12:16,299 --> 01:12:18,267 You're beautiful, Johnny. 1258 01:12:18,334 --> 01:12:21,971 Why don't you get the boys some quiche? 1259 01:12:22,038 --> 01:12:24,040 There you go. 1260 01:12:24,107 --> 01:12:27,076 Es spiritus sanctum. 1261 01:12:27,143 --> 01:12:31,648 Johnny, this is one of our best guards, Tony. 1262 01:12:31,715 --> 01:12:33,783 Hiya, Tony. How are you? 1263 01:12:33,850 --> 01:12:37,387 You took a shot at me once. 1264 01:12:37,454 --> 01:12:39,656 I never forget a gun. 1265 01:12:39,723 --> 01:12:43,026 Are we going to do this or what? 1266 01:12:55,505 --> 01:12:57,507 There's nothing left. Look. 1267 01:12:57,574 --> 01:12:59,676 Finest metal. 1268 01:12:59,743 --> 01:13:04,548 I keep telling you, Howard, the boy needs a role model. 1269 01:13:04,614 --> 01:13:06,650 Rocky, I'm so horny. 1270 01:13:06,716 --> 01:13:11,020 Oh, Johnny, Vermin's turning the place into a dive. 1271 01:13:11,087 --> 01:13:12,622 And Johnny-- 1272 01:13:12,689 --> 01:13:17,126 Don't tell me. He put in a salad bar. 1273 01:13:17,193 --> 01:13:19,596 He's making a play for me. 1274 01:13:19,663 --> 01:13:24,200 Wait a minute. That's just what we want. 1275 01:13:24,267 --> 01:13:26,402 I got to prove he framed me. 1276 01:13:26,470 --> 01:13:29,038 Lil, play up to him. 1277 01:13:29,105 --> 01:13:32,809 But, Johnny-- No "buts." Keep your eyes and ears open. 1278 01:13:32,876 --> 01:13:36,012 The first thing you hear, get it to me on the grapevine. 1279 01:13:36,079 --> 01:13:38,815 Got it. That-a girl. 1280 01:13:38,882 --> 01:13:40,817 Come here. 1281 01:13:46,490 --> 01:13:49,392 Next time, I'll bring a can opener. 1282 01:13:49,459 --> 01:13:51,895 Good idea. Come here. 1283 01:13:55,431 --> 01:13:57,601 Yo! 1284 01:14:06,510 --> 01:14:08,845 I can hear again and I can see. 1285 01:14:08,912 --> 01:14:12,982 I can hear again and I can see! 1286 01:14:13,049 --> 01:14:15,184 But who am I? 1287 01:14:22,325 --> 01:14:24,761 Tommy, please eat something. 1288 01:14:24,828 --> 01:14:27,130 I not gonna eat until I've saved my brother. 1289 01:14:27,196 --> 01:14:31,167 Keep up the good work, Governor Kelly. 1290 01:14:34,037 --> 01:14:36,172 So it's governor? 1291 01:14:36,239 --> 01:14:38,341 Just cheap talk, Mom. 1292 01:14:38,407 --> 01:14:42,111 Anybody that would send his brother to the hot seat gets my vote. 1293 01:14:42,178 --> 01:14:46,816 Mom! I'm trying to prove Johnny's innocence. 1294 01:14:46,883 --> 01:14:49,819 If I leave things to you, 1295 01:14:49,886 --> 01:14:52,722 Johnny will fry like his father. 1296 01:14:52,789 --> 01:14:57,894 Your old mom just might have something for you tonight. 1297 01:15:08,672 --> 01:15:10,239 Who is it? 1298 01:15:10,306 --> 01:15:12,842 Open up. It's Ma Kelly. 1299 01:15:12,909 --> 01:15:16,580 What do you want? I gotta talk to you. 1300 01:15:16,646 --> 01:15:18,982 We have nothing to say to each other. 1301 01:15:19,048 --> 01:15:22,786 We got a lot to say. We got a lot in common. 1302 01:15:22,852 --> 01:15:24,721 We both scrub floors, 1303 01:15:24,788 --> 01:15:26,723 we're both swell lookers, 1304 01:15:26,790 --> 01:15:28,658 and we're not Chinese. 1305 01:15:28,725 --> 01:15:31,294 You been doing your homework. 1306 01:15:31,360 --> 01:15:33,262 What do you want? 1307 01:15:33,329 --> 01:15:38,167 - How much do you want to tell the truth? - $19,500. 1308 01:15:41,437 --> 01:15:44,273 Boy, am I having a good year! 1309 01:15:49,913 --> 01:15:51,748 What's the matter, you got no manners? 1310 01:15:51,815 --> 01:15:55,752 Send me a bill for the door. You don't even wait for the body to get cold. 1311 01:15:55,819 --> 01:15:57,887 I go where the action is. 1312 01:15:57,954 --> 01:16:00,523 Where's your mom? You send her up the river too? 1313 01:16:00,590 --> 01:16:02,759 What do you want, Mr. D.A.? 1314 01:16:02,826 --> 01:16:05,795 And make it quick, huh? 1315 01:16:05,862 --> 01:16:08,431 I have a subpoena for you. 1316 01:16:08,497 --> 01:16:12,335 What for? You ain't got a thing on me. 1317 01:16:12,401 --> 01:16:17,340 Does the name Mary Margaret Katherine Danine strike a familiar chord? 1318 01:16:17,406 --> 01:16:19,442 I'm tone deaf. 1319 01:16:19,508 --> 01:16:21,811 Too bad. She's singing like a canary. 1320 01:16:21,878 --> 01:16:25,248 We got her in her own cage. 1321 01:16:25,314 --> 01:16:28,284 I'm going to enjoy sending you to the chair. 1322 01:16:28,351 --> 01:16:33,857 Come on, boys. I don't like the smell here. 1323 01:16:33,923 --> 01:16:37,393 That cleaning dame will spill her guts. 1324 01:16:37,460 --> 01:16:39,829 We can't get to her. 1325 01:16:39,896 --> 01:16:42,966 But we can get to him. 1326 01:16:43,032 --> 01:16:44,433 How, boss? 1327 01:16:44,500 --> 01:16:46,870 Don't you listen to the radio? 1328 01:16:46,936 --> 01:16:49,238 The governor and D.A. Tommy Kelly... 1329 01:16:49,305 --> 01:16:53,242 will attend the premiere of the new James Cagney movie tomorrow night. 1330 01:16:53,309 --> 01:16:56,379 Should be clear skies as the governor and D.A. Tommy Kelly... 1331 01:16:56,445 --> 01:16:58,381 attend the new James Cagney movie. 1332 01:16:58,447 --> 01:17:01,450 Which theater? 1333 01:17:01,517 --> 01:17:03,286 [ Radio ] The Savoy, on 37th. 1334 01:17:03,352 --> 01:17:06,656 It will be like shooting ducks in a pond. 1335 01:17:06,723 --> 01:17:08,992 Once we knock the D.A. off, 1336 01:17:09,058 --> 01:17:12,662 that cleaning dame will clam up just fine. 1337 01:17:15,699 --> 01:17:17,834 Get this to Johnny on the grapevine. 1338 01:17:17,901 --> 01:17:20,436 Vermin's going to kill Johnny's brother... 1339 01:17:20,503 --> 01:17:22,505 at the Savoy Theater tomorrow night. 1340 01:17:22,571 --> 01:17:24,808 Got it? Got it. 1341 01:17:31,214 --> 01:17:34,450 Vermin's going to kill Johnny's brother at the Savoy Theater. 1342 01:17:34,517 --> 01:17:36,585 Pass it on. 1343 01:17:36,652 --> 01:17:39,588 Vermin's going to kill Johnny's brother. 1344 01:17:39,655 --> 01:17:42,591 Vermin's going to kill Johnny's mother. 1345 01:17:42,658 --> 01:17:46,095 Vermin's mother is going to kill Johnny. 1346 01:17:46,162 --> 01:17:48,998 [ Mumbling ] 1347 01:17:49,065 --> 01:17:51,534 Urgent message through the grapevine. 1348 01:17:51,600 --> 01:17:54,704 Yeah? What is it? 1349 01:17:54,771 --> 01:17:59,375 Johnny and the mothers are playin' "Stompin" at the Savoy in Vermont. 1350 01:17:59,442 --> 01:18:02,278 Vermin's going to kill my brother at the Savoy? 1351 01:18:02,345 --> 01:18:04,280 I didn't say that. 1352 01:18:04,347 --> 01:18:06,315 I know this grapevine. 1353 01:18:06,382 --> 01:18:09,685 I got to get out of here. 1354 01:18:11,320 --> 01:18:12,655 Guard! 1355 01:18:12,722 --> 01:18:14,791 Come here. 1356 01:18:15,725 --> 01:18:17,160 Yeah? 1357 01:18:17,226 --> 01:18:20,429 Smell that food. I think it's rotten. 1358 01:18:42,819 --> 01:18:45,321 What's all this about, Johnny? 1359 01:18:45,388 --> 01:18:47,757 I can't take it, Warden! 1360 01:18:47,824 --> 01:18:50,794 Send me to the chair tonight! 1361 01:18:50,860 --> 01:18:52,728 The waiting's driving me crazy! 1362 01:18:52,796 --> 01:18:54,898 You still got two weeks. 1363 01:18:54,964 --> 01:18:57,733 I don't want them! Fry me tonight! 1364 01:18:57,801 --> 01:19:00,336 Anything for you. 1365 01:19:00,403 --> 01:19:02,806 We'll bump Steinberg. 1366 01:19:02,872 --> 01:19:06,075 Dangerously will go to the chair tonight. 1367 01:19:13,716 --> 01:19:16,585 Everyone who is anyone is here tonight, 1368 01:19:16,652 --> 01:19:20,156 including Mr. Crimefighter, District Attorney Tommy Kelly. 1369 01:19:20,223 --> 01:19:24,260 They're talking about you as our next governor. 1370 01:19:24,327 --> 01:19:26,095 That's very nice, 1371 01:19:26,162 --> 01:19:28,731 but all I'm concerned about... 1372 01:19:28,798 --> 01:19:31,134 is proving my brother's innocence. 1373 01:19:31,200 --> 01:19:35,371 Johnny, if you're listening, I love you. 1374 01:19:45,348 --> 01:19:47,150 Your turn, Johnny. 1375 01:19:47,216 --> 01:19:50,286 The priest you requested has arrived. 1376 01:19:50,353 --> 01:19:52,721 Are you ready, my son? 1377 01:19:52,788 --> 01:19:56,792 I'm ready if you are, Father. 1378 01:20:02,165 --> 01:20:04,567 Dominus obiscum, Nabisco. 1379 01:20:04,633 --> 01:20:06,735 Espiritus sanctum. 1380 01:20:06,802 --> 01:20:09,772 They gustovus... So long, Johnny. 1381 01:20:09,839 --> 01:20:11,340 me gustovus, you gustovus. 1382 01:20:11,407 --> 01:20:14,878 We miss the bus, they miss the bus. 1383 01:20:14,944 --> 01:20:17,346 Be brave, Johnny. 1384 01:20:17,413 --> 01:20:19,215 When's the next bus? 1385 01:20:19,282 --> 01:20:21,851 Sum cum laude, magnum cum laude, 1386 01:20:21,918 --> 01:20:24,387 the radio's still laude. 1387 01:20:24,453 --> 01:20:26,222 Good luck, Johnny. 1388 01:20:26,289 --> 01:20:28,657 Semper fidelus, high fidelus. 1389 01:20:28,724 --> 01:20:31,627 Why didn't I take shop? 1390 01:20:31,694 --> 01:20:36,632 Post meridian, antimeridian, Uncle Meridian, all the little meridians. 1391 01:20:36,699 --> 01:20:39,168 Good-bye, Johnny. Good-bye, Rock. 1392 01:20:39,235 --> 01:20:41,737 The Magna Carta, Master Charga... 1393 01:20:41,804 --> 01:20:44,207 Spit in his eye, Johnny. 1394 01:20:44,273 --> 01:20:47,610 dumpro kelus, lots of Vitalis. You bet, Rabbi. 1395 01:20:50,179 --> 01:20:52,916 Do you have any last words, Johnny? 1396 01:20:54,650 --> 01:20:57,353 Well said. 1397 01:21:03,659 --> 01:21:08,164 Okay, Warden. This is where we say good-bye. 1398 01:21:08,231 --> 01:21:12,668 You weren't really going to kill me, were you? 1399 01:21:12,735 --> 01:21:14,603 What, with this? 1400 01:21:22,678 --> 01:21:27,250 [ Siren Blaring ] 1401 01:21:27,316 --> 01:21:28,918 [ Radio ] Calling all cars. 1402 01:21:28,985 --> 01:21:32,555 Johnny Dangerously has just escaped from state prison. 1403 01:21:32,621 --> 01:21:36,993 Could I have a popcorn, a Milk Duds, and a white fish? 1404 01:21:55,444 --> 01:21:57,981 When we going to give it to him? 1405 01:21:58,047 --> 01:22:00,483 Just when Cagney gets his in the movie, 1406 01:22:00,549 --> 01:22:03,719 a few minutes from now. 1407 01:22:03,786 --> 01:22:05,955 Calling all cars. Calling all cars. 1408 01:22:06,022 --> 01:22:08,157 Be on the lookout for Johnny Dangerously... 1409 01:22:08,224 --> 01:22:10,126 and two accomplices in a black sedan. 1410 01:22:10,193 --> 01:22:11,961 I repeat, in a black sedan. 1411 01:22:12,028 --> 01:22:14,763 Black sedan, huh? 1412 01:22:14,830 --> 01:22:16,732 We'll see about that. 1413 01:22:16,799 --> 01:22:18,767 I hope this works. 1414 01:22:18,834 --> 01:22:21,170 It always does at home. 1415 01:22:21,237 --> 01:22:23,339 Come on, shelf paper. 1416 01:22:28,044 --> 01:22:30,479 Step back or they'll plug me. 1417 01:22:30,546 --> 01:22:32,715 Get out of the way, boss. No! 1418 01:22:57,173 --> 01:22:59,108 Calling all cars. Calling all cars. 1419 01:22:59,175 --> 01:23:01,044 Johnny Dangerously now driving a white sedan, 1420 01:23:01,110 --> 01:23:03,979 disguised as a trout Fisherman. 1421 01:23:04,047 --> 01:23:06,315 Johnny, we've been spotted. 1422 01:23:09,152 --> 01:23:11,620 Peel the next layer. 1423 01:23:14,323 --> 01:23:17,426 Someday that will be in Johnny Junior's room. 1424 01:23:17,493 --> 01:23:19,628 Sure, sure. 1425 01:23:19,695 --> 01:23:22,965 There he goes. Get him! Don't let him get away. 1426 01:23:23,032 --> 01:23:25,634 He knows too much. 1427 01:23:27,336 --> 01:23:31,607 Calling all cars. Be on the lookout for-- 1428 01:23:31,674 --> 01:23:33,509 Now, listen to this. 1429 01:23:33,576 --> 01:23:35,611 Dangerously and accomplices, dressed as nuns, 1430 01:23:35,678 --> 01:23:40,483 driving a sedan covered with-- oh, you'll love this-- duckies and bunnies. 1431 01:23:40,549 --> 01:23:43,552 Calling all cars, calling all cars. 1432 01:23:43,619 --> 01:23:46,355 Come to Dooley's bar. I'm buying. 1433 01:23:53,462 --> 01:23:56,165 There's something you don't see every day. 1434 01:23:58,401 --> 01:24:00,903 Everybody stay where you are. 1435 01:24:00,969 --> 01:24:03,038 Alan, keep down. 1436 01:24:12,448 --> 01:24:14,817 You might as well come down, Pembroke. 1437 01:24:14,883 --> 01:24:17,786 There's no one left but you. 1438 01:24:28,664 --> 01:24:30,366 Ah, shit. 1439 01:24:30,433 --> 01:24:31,800 Aah! 1440 01:24:36,972 --> 01:24:38,841 Johnny, are you okay? 1441 01:24:38,907 --> 01:24:40,943 Sure, kid. 1442 01:24:41,009 --> 01:24:43,279 You didn't get hit, did you? 1443 01:24:43,346 --> 01:24:45,414 I don't think so. 1444 01:24:47,416 --> 01:24:50,119 Boy, does that come in handy! 1445 01:24:50,186 --> 01:24:53,622 You would have taken the bullet for me. 1446 01:24:53,689 --> 01:24:57,226 I was counting on a lot of missing. 1447 01:24:57,293 --> 01:24:59,628 Johnny! Oh! 1448 01:24:59,695 --> 01:25:04,500 We'll have to take you back to the big house. 1449 01:25:04,567 --> 01:25:09,838 I have a witness that will clear Johnny. That's your man! 1450 01:25:09,905 --> 01:25:11,874 Officer, release this man. 1451 01:25:11,940 --> 01:25:14,577 I'm granting him a full pardon. 1452 01:25:14,643 --> 01:25:16,078 Oh, Johnny. 1453 01:25:16,145 --> 01:25:18,147 Hey, thanks, Gov. 1454 01:25:18,214 --> 01:25:21,116 You shouldn't shoot me, Johnny. 1455 01:25:21,184 --> 01:25:23,586 My grandmother shot me once. 1456 01:25:25,621 --> 01:25:28,991 Johnny, darling, you must be exhausted. 1457 01:25:29,057 --> 01:25:31,026 Breaking out of prison, 1458 01:25:31,093 --> 01:25:34,230 racing here to save your brother. 1459 01:25:34,297 --> 01:25:37,032 You've had a full day. 1460 01:25:37,099 --> 01:25:38,701 Funny, Ma, I'm not even tired. 1461 01:25:38,767 --> 01:25:42,305 Must have been that nap after lunch. 1462 01:25:42,371 --> 01:25:44,873 Oh, I'll have some stories... 1463 01:25:44,940 --> 01:25:47,243 to tell my grandchildren-- 1464 01:25:47,310 --> 01:25:49,345 if I have any. 1465 01:25:49,412 --> 01:25:54,149 Lil, let's start a little gang of our own. 1466 01:25:54,217 --> 01:25:55,684 That okay? 1467 01:25:55,751 --> 01:25:57,553 Oh, Johnny, I like it. 1468 01:25:57,620 --> 01:26:00,756 Kid, I'll make you love it. 1469 01:26:06,862 --> 01:26:08,964 So that's my story. 1470 01:26:09,031 --> 01:26:11,099 I hope you learned something. 1471 01:26:11,166 --> 01:26:12,935 I sure did. 1472 01:26:13,001 --> 01:26:14,937 Wow! The electric chair. 1473 01:26:15,003 --> 01:26:16,539 I'm going straight. 1474 01:26:16,605 --> 01:26:19,308 You better see that you do, 1475 01:26:19,375 --> 01:26:21,910 or I'm coming after you. 1476 01:26:21,977 --> 01:26:23,779 Get out of here. 1477 01:26:23,846 --> 01:26:28,016 Wait. Aren't you forgetting something? 1478 01:26:28,083 --> 01:26:29,418 [ Meow ] 1479 01:26:32,355 --> 01:26:34,323 There you go. 1480 01:26:34,390 --> 01:26:36,425 Thanks, Mr. Kelly. 1481 01:26:38,561 --> 01:26:40,296 Hey, kid. 1482 01:26:40,363 --> 01:26:41,930 Don't forget. 1483 01:26:41,997 --> 01:26:43,799 Crime doesn't pay. 1484 01:26:43,866 --> 01:26:44,867 Right. 1485 01:26:46,969 --> 01:26:49,505 [ Horn Honks ] 1486 01:26:49,572 --> 01:26:51,407 Johnny. 1487 01:26:58,381 --> 01:27:00,816 Well, it paid a little. 1488 01:27:08,324 --> 01:27:09,625 * We're all alone * 1489 01:27:09,692 --> 01:27:13,028 * No chaperone can get our number * 1490 01:27:13,095 --> 01:27:15,264 * The world's in slumber * 1491 01:27:15,331 --> 01:27:17,666 * Let's misbehave * 1492 01:27:17,733 --> 01:27:20,303 * There's something wild about you, child * 1493 01:27:20,369 --> 01:27:22,505 * That's so contagious * 1494 01:27:22,571 --> 01:27:24,273 * Let's be outrageous * 1495 01:27:24,340 --> 01:27:26,675 * Let's misbehave * 1496 01:27:26,742 --> 01:27:28,544 * When Adam won eve's hand * 1497 01:27:28,611 --> 01:27:31,580 * He wouldn't stand for teasin' * 1498 01:27:31,647 --> 01:27:33,181 * He didn't care about * 1499 01:27:33,248 --> 01:27:36,352 * Those apples out of season * 1500 01:27:36,419 --> 01:27:38,387 * They say the spring means just one thing * 1501 01:27:38,454 --> 01:27:40,255 * To little lovebirds * 1502 01:27:40,323 --> 01:27:43,091 * We're not above birds * 1503 01:27:43,158 --> 01:27:45,461 * Let's misbehave * 1504 01:27:45,528 --> 01:27:47,530 * It's getting late, and while I wait * 1505 01:27:47,596 --> 01:27:50,032 * My poor heart aches on * 1506 01:27:50,098 --> 01:27:52,301 * Why keep the brakes on * 1507 01:27:52,368 --> 01:27:54,670 * Let's misbehave * 1508 01:27:54,737 --> 01:27:57,105 * I feel quite sure a good amour * 1509 01:27:57,172 --> 01:27:59,542 * Would be attractive * 1510 01:27:59,608 --> 01:28:02,044 * While we're still active * 1511 01:28:02,110 --> 01:28:04,447 * Let's misbehave * 1512 01:28:04,513 --> 01:28:06,281 * You know my heart is true * 1513 01:28:06,349 --> 01:28:09,084 * When you say you for me care * 1514 01:28:09,151 --> 01:28:10,686 * Somebody's sure to tell * 1515 01:28:10,753 --> 01:28:13,722 * But what the heck do we care * 1516 01:28:13,789 --> 01:28:16,024 * They say that bears have love affairs * 1517 01:28:16,091 --> 01:28:18,361 * And even camels * 1518 01:28:18,427 --> 01:28:20,629 * We're merely mammals * 1519 01:28:20,696 --> 01:28:23,098 * Let's misbehave * 1520 01:28:23,165 --> 01:28:24,800 * If you'd be oh, so sweet * 1521 01:28:24,867 --> 01:28:27,803 * And only heed your fate, dear * 1522 01:28:27,870 --> 01:28:32,475 * Would be the great event of 1928, dear * 1523 01:28:32,541 --> 01:28:34,677 * They say the spring means just one thing * 1524 01:28:34,743 --> 01:28:37,212 * To little lovebirds * 1525 01:28:37,279 --> 01:28:39,415 * We're not above birds * 1526 01:28:39,482 --> 01:28:43,652 * Let's misbehave ** 99006

Can't find what you're looking for?
Get subtitles in any language from opensubtitles.com, and translate them here.