Original subtitles

(THEME MUSIC PLAYING)

(SCOFFS)

MR. BEAN: Right.

Let's get to it.

Okay!

Phooey! (COUGHS)

Phooey!

Oh!

Phew! Goodness me.

Here we go.

Right. Let's get you in here.

Oh, goodness.

Oh.

Oh, that's a shame.

(INHALES SHARPLY)

(EXHALES)

(PANTING)

(MUSIC PLAYING)

Oh. (CHUCKLES) That's quite catchy, actually.

Oh, I think I'll leave this until tomorrow.

Hmm.

Excuse me, madam. Thinking of selling your house?

No.

Just a moment!

Are you sure?

MRS. WICKET: That much?

Huh?

Absolutely.

You're on.

What did...

Just sign the agreement here.

(CHUCKLING)

See you tomorrow!

Eh?

There. (CHUCKLES)

MR. BEAN: Oh, no!

Oh?

Wait a minute.

(MUMBLING)

Okay.

(CELL PHONE RINGING)

Oh, hello, can I help you?

(IN DIFFERENT VOICE) Yes, I'd like to book an appointment, please.

12, Arbour Road.

Shall we say tomorrow at 11:00?

Okay.

Thank you.

Right, we haven't got long.

(TV PLAYING)

Off we go.

Now, I'll need that.

Here we go.

(HAMMERING)

One last outing? (SIGHS)

Oh, go on then.

Oh, see you later, ladies.

(SIGHING)

Morning.

Bye.

(CHUCKLES)

(SNICKERS)

-(SIGHS) Hello. -(HONKS HORN)

(CHUCKLES)

Off we go.

ESTATE AGENT: Hmm.

Perfecto.

(SNIFFING)

-Ah. -(KNOCKING AT DOOR)

First viewing of the day.

Oh, hello. Ooh.

Oh, hello.

-Why don't we start... -Ah, gah.

Don't you want to see the...

So this is it, is it?

Hmm, no.

No, I'd like to start outside, please.

Okay.

Ah, the shed.

Can I see inside the shed?

-Oh. -Thank you.

Oh.

Cake. Mmm.

ESTATE AGENT: Hey! Hey!

-(BANGING ON DOOR) -Let me out!

-Hey! -(SNICKERING)

ESTATE AGENT: What's going on?

-(BOTH SIGHING CONTENTLY) -(PIGEONS COOING)

(GROWLS)

BOTH: Ah.

Ha-ha!

There we go. Excellent.

Stage one complete.

(CHUCKLES)

Oh.

Maybe just...

-Perfect. -(KNOCKING AT DOOR)

Ooh. Ah.

Ah, good morning.

Come in, come in, come in, come in.

Ah!

Oh, you found the floorboard.

Well, there are some superficial things, of course,

but, uh, but nothing to worry about.

Um...

Oh. Er...

(CHUCKLES)

(GASPS)

Oh, well, that's easily mended.

Right, well, if you'd like to follow me upstairs.

(CHUCKLES)

Right, well, this is very much the deluxe part of the property.

-ESTATE AGENT: Let me out! Oi! -(BANGING ON DOOR)

Oi!

Yes, well, the neighbors are a little noisy.

(HUFFING)

Huh? Ah.

One of the neighbors seems to have escaped. I'll just be a moment.

Stay there.

No, oh, no.

Oh.

-(BANGING ON DOOR) -ESTATE AGENT: Oi!

Open this door!

Open this door.

Oh!

I think I'll come with you, if you don't mind.

Wait. Wait.

-Give me that. -Get off me!

Get off, get off.

I'm keeping it.

Get off, get off.

Oh!

(KNOCKING AT DOOR)

-Welcome. -Hello.

You, again?

Ow, oh, ow!

-Ooh. -Sorry.

(CHUCKLES) Come on through.

OLD MAN: Oh.

(CHUCKLES)

Carefully now.

ESTATE AGENT: This way.

OLD MAN: Smells of cat.

Carefully.

-Not bad. -(GASPS)

(BANGING)

(SNICKERING)

Ah, ooh, Ah!

Come back! Come back!

(DOORBELL RINGS)

Ooh!

Hmm, oh.

(CHUCKLES)

(DOORBELL RINGS)

Hmm.

Oh.

What?

MR. BEAN: Woo woo!

-Woo! -(SCREAMS)

Oh! (SNICKERS)

(SCREAMING)

(SCREAMING)

Oh!

Right.

It won't be the same without you.

Oh, you'll miss this.

(CAMERA SHUTTER CLICKS)

To us!

To us.

MR. BEAN: Okay.

(CHUCKLES) Perfect.

(CHUCKLES)

Now, now, now, wait, no!

(MUFFLED SPEAKING)

ESTATE AGENT: There.

-Perfecto. -(DOORBELL RINGS)

Only one left.

Mmm, mmm, mmm.

(STRAINING)

(SIGHS)

(SCOFFS)

This way.

(MUFFLED SPEAKING)

(CHUCKLES) Don't mind him.

Let me show you the kitchen.

(MR. BEAN CHUCKLING)

ESTATE AGENT: Ah!

(GROANS)

(YELLING)

MR. BEAN: (LAUGHS) Mmm!

(STRAINING)

(GROANS)

-See you soon. -(YELLING)

The deal's off.

Eh? You what?

Looks like you're staying then.

-(CHUCKLES) -(MRS. WICKET SIGHS)

Ah!

Eh?

What?

Oh! Ooh.

Oh!

(MR. BEAN GRUNTING AND BANGING)

Bean!

(GRUNTS)

Oh, no!

(THEME MUSIC PLAYING)

Oh!

(SIGHS IN EXASPERATION)

-(EXCLAIMS) -(GLASS SHATTERS)