Original subtitles

Seriously?

Are you dead?

- Only if you let me live, cowboy. - I'm a cowgirl!

Bang, bang!

- Marleen, come inside. - Uncle Arthur's here!

That'll do. Help Mom with breakfast.

Go on.

What are you doing out here?

Hey, Ronny.

Something terrible happened. You have to promise not to tell anyone.

Fight with the old lady?

- No... Yes... - What did she want now?

For you to chop off your other hand too?

Or worse?

Sex?

- I nearly killed her. - Huh?

I looked her in the eyes and imagined how it would be if she were no more.

A dream, right?

And then she chucked you out and you slept in the wind and rain.

Ring the doorbell next time. No matter how late it is. Okay?

Subtitles by explosiveskull

Arthur's Law

I hope Arthur cleaned up the house. I don't want the memories resurfacing.

What?

Do you think clearing away shards and bullet holes

can wipe away last night?

A man died, Martha!

We can't press a button and undo it all.

Did you get up on the wrong side of the bed?

That's not what I meant.

It's just...

Yesterday, my life was more or less in order, and now...

You're not the only one who got dragged into this.

- You wanted to get rid of the body. - Don't put the blame on me!

Arthur just couldn't get enough.

He had to go amusing himself with a hooker,

although I prepared such a lovely birthday for him.

We committed a crime!

I'm a police officer!

And you are the best one I've ever seen.

If there's anyone who can iron out all of this,

then it's you.

We'll manage this together. You'll see. Come here.

There's the boss.

Hi, boss.

Time to get to work, men.

What the heck?

- It's obvious who did this. - Yeah?

The foreigners we brought in.

Aladdin, Ali Baba and all them. Bunch of criminals!

Justin, just shut up and get rid of it.

Everyone else get to work.

Holy shit!

What's going on now? Boss? Boss?

We're so glad you were born this day.

Without you we wouldn't feel this way.

We're so glad we're together at last. Happy birthday to you, you're the best!

Great!

- Candles! - Blow them out.

Bravo! Now let's eat.

- Sit down. - Hat off.

Where did you get such a great cake so quickly?

I always have one ready. Ronny loves it so much, as you can see.

Want one?

Arthur, if you want you can sleep in the guest room.

- Thank you. - Till the weekend, then Mom moves in.

- Grandma's coming to live with us! - Yes!

Sure makes the grandkids happy.

Stairlift's in, we'll get a walk-in shower, toilet armrests.

Welcome to the "Ronny Menze" Retirement Home.

It's good we're converting the house. For later, when we get old.

We don't need a stairlift.

I'll carry you up the stairs, until I keel over.

Do you need a hand?

You got that, honey?

Arthur?

Arthur?

Arthur!

Yeah.

So what are you up to today?

Taking my happiness into my own hands.

- Does that mean he is preserved? - I don't know.

- Yeah. - Okay.

Muriel. Muriel.

The dead man is Mario Wystraszewski.

- The pimp? - Someone wanted to get rid of him.

- Oh, it looks like an accident to me. - An accident?

Here's my theory.

Local alcoholic loses his balance

plummets down, lands on a pallet of expanding foam.

- Dead. - An alcoholic?

How else do you explain all the bottles up there?

I mean, the fact that he had problems was an open secret.

- He was always in "Kronleuchter." - It was his brothel.

- Yes, that too. - Yeah, that too.

Besides, why would he be on the roof of a warehouse at night?

- The view from up there is great. - Yeah?

Teenagers always hang out up there.

Drinking, smoking weed and all that.

I think I'm going to go over to the bar.

- There's a witness. - What?

- What? - Yes. He claims it was murder.

Good, it's good that there's a witness.

- I'd like to talk to him. - He's outside.

How about you go to "Kronleuchter"?

I'm no good at delivering terrible news. It always upsets me so much.

- Don't you want me with you? - I'll manage.

- Well, you are the boss. Right? - Yeah.

- Honey, you have to help me. - With what?

My little blowfish having trouble with her shoesies?

- First the pants. - Okay.

Good news. I talked to the doctor yesterday.

And it seems that having sex during pregnancy isn't a bad thing.

Okay. Cool.

- You sure? - Uh-huh.

- Let's talk later, okay? Time's tight. - Five minutes!

And what if I... You know, if I hit the amniotic sac?

Not technically possible, says the doc.

- Okay. And if he saw this guy? - Still not possible.

Okay.

Listen, the problem is just... I just did.

- You know. - What? In the shower?

- I can drive you to work. - I'll ride my bike.

I need a saddle today.

Hey, you! Everything all right with you?

What?

Shit! Mario?

- That guy there? - Yep.

Thanks. I can take over from here.

- Shouldn't I...? - Let's not give him too much attention.

That could cloud his memory.

If you say so.

You, it was you!

You, and you again.

And that funny little man.

Whatever it was that you allegedly saw last night

this will help you forget everything.

Stop! Stop there!

Oh well.

Wait, I'm almost done here.

One Mississippi, two Mississippi, three Mississippi...

49-62 to Fox.

Fox, copy.

- Witness missing from crime scene. - Description?

Man, about 50 years old, roughly five foot eight.

Unkempt appearance.

- He fled towards the city center. - All right, a unit is on its way.

Hello, this is Arthur Ahnepol's voicemail.

If you have something to say, please leave a message after the beep.

If you have nothing to say, please leave a beep.

Arthur, where the hell are you?

The house won't clean itself. Come home now!

And change your stupid message!

It wasn't funny the first time or the 100th!

I wish you love without pain.

- And a hand that you can hold. - Jesse!

- I wish you love without pain. - Jesse?

- And that hope never deserts you. - I'm coming in.

That your dreams stay with you.

And when you need some tenderness.

I wish you love without pain.

And happiness for eternity!

Yes?

Yes!

Coming!

- You here as a customer or a cop? - It might be better if you sat down.

What's up?

- Okay. - Well, then.

Yeah...

Well, what's up?

It all went way too fast. As soon as I started sawing it was...

What happened, happened. Okay?

Dude, I sawed his leg off!

You have to keep a clear head.

Go wash your face, then we'll talk it over.

Mario Wystraszewski died last night.

My father?

Yes.

No, that can't be. You must be mistaken.

No, we've identified him. Beyond a doubt. I'm sorry.

What happened?

We're still trying to find out.

We salvaged his body from a warehouse this morning.

Why salvaged?

He was covered in expanding foam. We had to cut him out of it.

I...

Unfortunately, I have to ask you this.

Is it possible that someone had it out for your father?

- Did he have enemies? - Why are you asking?

- Do you think it was murder? - No! Well...

At this point we can't rule anything out.

And? That better?

Much better.

What the...? What was that?

Please stand up.

Steven?

Okay.

Holy moly!

Mario, please answer, because... Tell me it's not true.

Tell me that the cops are mistaken.

You can't leave me here alone.

Yes, I need an ambulance to the "Kronleuchter".

I have an unconscious man and a man with a chandelier in his head.

No, that one's not conscious.

Don't know, a chandelier is no small thing.

Hello, have a nice day.

Please, no photos. Please put the camera down. Thank you.

There will be further information in tomorrow's papers.

There's another dead guy in "Kronleuchter." Move!

Not you too.

What the heck?

Damn!

Our second dead man in one day.

Yeah, and it's not even noon.

Tanja, have those people escorted out.

Hey, put the tape up outside of the accident scene.

Jesus.

Steven? Get up please.

- I'm allowed in here. - Quiet.

Steven!

I must be nuts.

Arthur.

Arthur.

Arthur!

Arthur!

Come here.

Get in. Come on!

You've had a truly shitty day.

It's best you go home, rest up and talk to no one.

Especially not the cops.

The worst thing for us would be you blabbing in your current state.

I don't know, maybe we should lay low and sit tight.

- No. Put our business on ice? No way. - Yeah...

I haven't paid off my ride yet. And I just gave my girl a cat.

A Savannah cat.

We lost two of our best men today. I bet it was the Albanians.

We're being taken seriously.

They want to take us down because we're big time now.

We can't cave in now.

We have to show that we're tough and resolute.

We owe it to Steven and Mario.

Let's find these assholes!

And show them that it's best not to mess with us.

Men, it's time for us to practice martial arts and get guns.

Yeah, man!

I don't want to nip this in the bud, but guns are out of our league.

It didn't help Mario. Please! Let's talk to the boss.

Nope.

Oh yes, and Justin...

Would you get a condolence thing for Claudia?

Something nice, a few flowers. Thanks.

What are you going to do with this?

Make it disappear, what else? This car is a ticking bomb.

Good thing I found the keys while cleaning.

Where were you the whole day anyway?

Do you think flowers will make up for what you did to me?

I'll be glad if I can ever close my eyes again

and not see the muzzle of that gun that was pointed at my head.

Once we get rid of the car you have to spackle the bullet holes.

The bullet hole in the kitchen window is causing a major draft!

And the roof in the bedroom is still leaky.

This isn't how I imagined my future. Not even in my worst nightmares!

Was there ever a day in your life,

one single day, when you enjoyed being with me?

What kind of a question is that?

Of course there was! Several.

But since the hand thing you're drowning in self-pity.

My hand? I sawed off my hand because of you!

I'd have done the same for you.

Because I want nothing more than for us to be happy.

You know I haven't had it easy.

But I never quit, so pull yourself together!

No, Martha. It is over once and for all.

- I'm leaving you. - Don't be silly.

I'm serious. I'm going!

- Where to? - Jesse.

The hooker?

You can't even afford that.

What on earth has become of you?

A hooker!

Arthur?

You're a murderer now. Have you forgotten?

It was self-defense and you know it.

Why did you get rid of a body?

If you go Arthur, then it's to prison.

Getting rid...

Getting rid of the body was your idea. You're in this too!

No, that's not true. We had a fight yesterday.

You threatened me, I stayed at my sister's, she can confirm that.

Oh! You won't get away with that. Martha, you won't!

And who will they believe?

An unemployed cripple who tried to defraud his insurance?

Or a policewoman?

Get back in, Arthur.

I'd rather go to prison than back to you, Martha.

Don't chance it.

If you're not back home by evening I'm calling the police!

Come back!

POLICE

That's 5-2-6...

Could you please?

Hello, everybody.

This morning and last night two fatal accidents occurred.

Steven Lehmann, the owner of the bar "Zum Kronleuchter",

was killed by a chandelier that came loose.

Shortly before, a presumably drunk Mario Wystraszewski

fell off the roof of the warehouse in Fontane Strasse.

Involuntary manslaughter and an occupational safety violation.

- On to the next item. - Muriel?

On the weekend people shot rocks at piglets on the pig farm.

Tanja, find those animal tormenters.

For Sparrow's Nest Nursery's lantern procession on Friday

the main street has to be blocked off, Harald, Micha.

- You two will escort them. - Muriel, I...

And, yet again, in the hill housing development,

a man was seen exposing himself.

Rainer, now no one wants to see that.

- Right? - Wystraszewski and Lehmann are dead.

And a man says he saw a murder.

- We should inform the Criminal Police. - Can we trust him?

A drunk homeless man who fled?

I mean, murder?

This isn't the Wild West.

This is still Klein Biddenbach.

Nothing is easier than this.

Shit.

Jesse.

So you already heard?

This is an odd sympathy bouquet.

He was the only one who looked after me.

If I was ill-treated or didn't get paid he could get really angry.

Like a real father, you know?

It is terrible what happened.

Could you imagine a life with me?

- I don't do flat-rate service. - No, no. I mean...

Can I stay with you without paying?

You deserve better.

The two of us...

A new beginning. Far away from here.

Somewhere where we can be happy and you can live your dream as a singer.

And where we're free.

And...

maybe together.

I'd leave with you right now, Arthur.

- Yeah? - Really, I like you.

But how do you imagine it?

What would we live off?

You can't even pay me for yesterday.

Then we'll look for a job. We'll be sure to find something.

Is that so?

Just look at us.

I turn tricks and you're on welfare.

Okay, bye, everyone. Rainer, banana.

Hey!

I'm trying to solve this case too.

Remember the promise we made to each other?

That we could trust each other no matter who became boss?

Impulsiveness won't help.

Maybe you're right about Lehmann.

A chandelier... It probably was just an accident.

- But Wystraszewski falling like that? - Why make killing him so complicated?

To erase evidence!

There are simpler ways to do that than burying him under loads of foam.

- I just don't want... - Hey.

I don't want to make a mockery of us before the Criminal Police.

Bring me one concrete piece of evidence to prove your murder theory, one.

Then we'll start a murder investigation.

- I'll do that. - Okay.

I'll do that.

Okay.

It would be a joke if Martha Dorothea Salomea Ahnepol

were unable to manage to sink this god-forsaken car in the lake.

Okay.

Hey! Open!

Open up!

Help! Shit!

Give it a try.

It lightens everything up a bit.

What are you doing?

Unpaid bills.

I can't afford to take a day off.

At least my father kept the guys who wanted to cheat me off my back.

If I get the bastard who did that to him I swear I'll...

We'll find a better job for you.

I can talk to Mrs. Lehmann from the job center across the street.

I did that a long time ago.

She told me I should be happy I have work at all.

"Main thing is you're off the street, you know?"

Besides...

The guys I work for they wouldn't just let me go.

ONE HOUR, THEN I CALL THE POLICE.

It's all just not that simple.

I know exactly what you mean.

Jesse!

I know how to get the money so we can leave here.

What's your plan?

Just trust me.

Okay.

Just as long as you don't go sawing this hand off too.

Because I still need it.

Wait a moment, inspector.

- I'm back. - It's okay, it's taken care of.

Uh-huh. Yes.

Just in time.

Guess it didn't go so well.

- How about you? - Splendidly.

Child's play.

The car poses no danger anymore.

Good. Thanks.

Until things are right between us again

perhaps I should sleep on the couch?

Good idea.

Diablo?

Diablo!

Diablo?

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Subtitles by explosiveskull