Original subtitles

A NETFLIX ORIGINAL SERIES

[piano music playing]

[female reporter 1] This super model turned actor is the sizzling hot new stud

on print, small and silver screens.

Advertisers are scrambling for any piece of his matinee idol looks

and boy next door sparkle.

[inaudible]

[male reporter] His social media is blowing up with 1.7 million followers

on Instagram and Facebook.

[female reporter 2] Even Korean girls are falling for this Taiwanese heart-throb.

-[girl in Korean] Draw me a heart. -Sure.

[female reporter 2] Yi-Hang has enchanted the nation

and warmed the heart of even the grumpiest of viewers.

We asked what he prefers more: comedy or drama.

I enjoy acting in all genres,

but I prefer characters that aren't over-simplified.

We're all just struggling to survive our own drama.

[female reporter 2] It's no surprise that Entertainment Magazine

granted their Hottest New Couple Award to the superstars:

heart-throb Yi-Hang Xu and the glamor goddess, Ling Yun.

Talent manager Ms. Ching Kwong said she would also be very supportive

of her clients' romantic relationship.

[dramatic music playing]

MORALITY JUSTICE

Boss Ni, Ms. Kwong is here.

-[Boss Ni] Tell our guest to have a seat. -[man] Yes, sir.

Ms. Kwong, this way, please.

Boss Ni.

[music continues]

[Boss Ni] Hmm...

This is some very serious shit.

Why aren't you going to the police?

Kun Ni...

we both know the police are in bed with the press.

If I go to the police, it will be all over the news.

So, what do you need my help for?

Everyone knows that your wife Han Lu was a beloved actress.

Even after she passed, you continued to support the next generation of actors.

I came hoping to ask a favor of you.

What exactly do you have in mind?

I'll help you depending on what you need from me.

It's simple.

What I need from you is a girl with skills.

Listen, that's impossible.

My gang is full of men, but they are all obnoxious scumbags.

[Kwong] Kun Ni, there is one person in your family who fits the bill:

your daughter.

[suspenseful electronic music playing]

[distant sirens blaring]

[female reporter] Yi-Hang has been in the industry for 14 years,

we asked what he prefers more: comedy or drama.

I enjoy acting in all genres,

but I prefer characters that aren't over-simplified.

We're all just struggling to survive our own drama.

[female reporter] Have you ever considered starting a romantic relationship

with your co-star, Ling Yun?

Well, we're just friends.

[female reporter] What about your future acting career?

[Yi-Hang] I would like to take a stab at more complex roles.

[man on receiver] Ms. Angie, I'm in position.

[Angie] Let me know if anything changes.

-[man on receiver] Roger that. -All teams report.

[excited shouting]

Second team in position.

[men laughing]

Fourth team in position.

Third team in position.

First team in position.

[Angie] Move out.

[engines revving]

[gunshot]

[temple bell ringing]

[man singing hymn]

[men continue singing]

-[woman gasps with excitement] -[both laugh]

Oh, how charming. How sincere. You clever, handsome man.

-Uh, hi. -Hmm?

You are?

Me? Do you see what's written here?

-"Temple guide." -[woman] Indeed, angel boy.

I know you well.

I saw your interview yesterday. You were inspiring.

And only a little pretentious.

-[woman laughs] -Thanks.

[woman] You made the wise choice to come and pray.

Our God has been waiting for your call,

and I'm here to present you with your special fortune here.

There. Now. Here. Oh, take it, read it, and remember!

[sighs] Relax. Now, I won't bite.

-Thanks. -[giggles] You're welcome.

[Yi-Hang] "Don't worry about what the future may hold.

Everything, including your marriage, has been destined."

Excuse me?

[temple bell rings]

[wind whirling]

6 STAR HOTEL

-[man] Radish. -[Radish] Yeah?

[man] Tell me as soon as you spot something.

[Radish] No sign of the target yet.

[chuckles] Lazy fat ass.

Angie's got two types - assholes and douchebags.

The first slept with his ex-wife on Sundays,

The second one had a mistress,

the third one fucked a drunk lady from a nightclub.

The fourth one had an affair with the escort lady.

The fifth one had an affair with his own female boss.

Look at the sixth boyfriend.

Are you done?

It's her own business. Why are you being so nosy?

Focus more on your job and less on being an annoying buffoon.

Mr. Gui, look. The target is in sight.

[Gui] Yeah, that's the bum. That's Shan. We got his ass.

Come in, Missy. The target's in sight. Target's in sight.

[concierge] Welcome home, Mr. Xu.

Unfortunately, the construction work damaged the pipes,

so the water had to be shut off.

If you need to freshen up, here's a hotel nearby,

It's just behind the subway station.

-I'm sorry. -[Yi-Hang] It's alright. Thank you.

[exhales]

[Shan] Hello, Kan? [exhales sharply]

Hey, it's Shan. Just confirming my girl for tonight.

[chuckles] 6 Star Hotel.

Room? Alishan.

[man] OK. Alright, later.

Hey. Time to make money.

-What suite? Which room? -Alishan.

[whoops]

Brothers.The mission we have this time is the same as before.

Perk up. This is a manhunt.

Let me emphasize three things.

First, we are very classy people,

so while we conduct our business, do not disturb the other guests.

Second, keep a low profile.

And third, it's the same. Keep a low profile.

-Understood? -[henchmen] Yes, sir.

[Gui] Keep a low profile. Lower your voices.

Hey!

Hey!

[chuckles] Hey, hey! Hey!

[clears throat] Hello, miss thing. You looking for a party?

[murmurs nervously]

[Gui] Shush...

I know when you get in there, it'll be a party of two.

Don't be afraid of me, just tell us where we can find your party of two.

We're all gentlemen here.

So?

[she murmurs nervously]

-Hehuanshan. -Hehuanshan?

-[stammers] -Good girl! Radish.

Pocket some cash. Take it!

Now, you can go dance with yourself.

Party on!

There goes a bat out of hell.

-Brothers, Hehuanshan. No fuckups. -[Henchmen] Yes, sir.

QILAISHAN DAXUESHAN

YANGMINGSHAN ZHENTOUVSHAN

MAXISHAN HEHUANSHAN

[Gui] Let's start.

[man] Who are you? What are you doing?

-[crashing] -[muffled shouting]

[Gui humming]

-Ms. Angie? Room found, douche found. -[Angie] I'll meet you at the usual spot.

-Roger. Usual spot. -[receiver beeps]

♪ You so smart, yeah, yeah, yeah ♪

♪ You're simply the best ♪

ALISHAN

Hey! What is taking so long? Where is my girl? My body is ready!

[engines revving]

[Gui] Hmm...

What a glorious night.

Bring the douche over.

-[muffled groans] -I love this view!

[Gui] I just go nuts for this fabulous view.

Isn't this the life?

It's always the highlight of our night, but I don't know why.

[man grunting]

-Hey... -Mr. Gui. I'll take care of him.

Hey, hold your butthole! This isn't the usual.

I just want to scare his cheating ass silly.

Oh, as for slaughtering the douche,

leave that to the lady.

[motorcycle engine revving]

[whoops]

Speak of the devil and she appears!

-[henchmen] Ms. Angie! -Hi.

[Radish] It's getting exciting now.

[man groaning]

[Gui] Angie, come to think of it, maybe you should--

-[man groaning] -[Gui] Change shift.

[man continues groaning]

Untie him.

[Angie] Congratulations!

From now on, you're officially my ex-boyfriend.

So... your smiley face...

-you can have it back! -[man groans]

-[Angie yells] -[muffled screams]

[water splashing]

[Gui] And goodbye, ex.

IN MEMORY OF MY BELOVED WIFE, HAN LU

[Boss Ni] Darling wife, our old friend Kwong Ching is here.

She is requesting that our daughter help out with a problem.

She wants to employ her as a bodyguard.

I disagree with that.

But I've always respected you, so I wanted to get your approval.

If this doesn't feel right to you either, please, just give me a sign.

-Uh, maybe we should... -Try again?

Yeah.

[exhales deeply]

[man] Welcome home, Ms. Angie.

I apologize that you came all this way for nothing.

I'm sorry that I can't be of any help.

It's OK, don't worry about it. It's fine. I'll take care of it.

[Boss Ni] Angie, can I introduce you to somebody?

She's an old friend of your mother and mine.

This is...

[Angie gasps]

You're Yi-Hang Xu's manager?

[man] Welcome.

Yes, that would be nice.

-Believe me. I can do it. -My pleasure.

-I'll get going then. -Ignore my dad. I can...

-Xiao Hu! -[man] Boss Ni?

-I can do it! -Get her car.

[Angie sighs]

-[phone beeps] -Dad...

[phone continues beeping]

DING DING SENT A PHOTO

Dad, I can do it! Come on!

Your total is 300 NTD.

[Yi-Hang] Thank you.

Sir, what happened to you?

I don't know.

Are you OK?

Yeah.

Is there a restroom here?

Behind that door over there.

Thanks.

[camera shutter clicking]

[phone beeps]

DING DING SENT A PHOTO

[Angie sighs]

Dad! Why won't you let me do this? Come on!

She's Yi-Hang and Ling Yun's manager. Don't you get it? Come on!

If I become Lin Yun's bodyguard, I'll also get to see Yi-Hang, Dad!

Calm down. Eat a bun.

Oh, Dad! Oh, my God! Come on! I want to go out and work!

Please, calm down.

-Eat a bun. -I don't want to eat a damn bun!

Wedding buns?

Who's getting married?

-You are. -What?

Who's the guy?

Eddie Chin.

-[squeals] -Angie, you're so pretty. [chuckles]

Eddie, you're just so fat.

When I grow up and we're both big people, will you marry me forever?

Will you stay this fat when you grow up?

What's bad about being fat?

Fat is yucky.

You're slim and pretty.

So, if I lose weight, will you be my wife?

[young Angie] Yeah.

-Can I call you my girlfriend now? -Whatever.

[men laughing]

"Ha, ha, ha." Why are you laughing?

Since when did I want to marry that fat ass?

Since you were a girl.

Are you shitting me? That's bullshit!

Mother made me promise to see you married before you turn 25.

I have to fulfill her dying wish.

Whatever happened to dating? Huh? Choosing for love not money?

It's been five years since your mother died.

In all that time, you've had six boyfriends at least.

You've been so thirsty for love, you've been choosing douchebags.

And what about your new boyfriend? Huh? Isn't he swimming in the river now?

How did you know?

You're not married yet,

so long as you're living under my roof...

I know it all - where you are and what you do.

Damn it. Gui, you little bitch!

[sneezes]

Ah, shit. Someone's cursing me.

Angie, darling, Cosmos gang is now the most powerful in Taiwan.

And Golden Dragon is the biggest gang in Hong Kong.

It's time our gangs joined forces to double our power.

United, we'll be all-powerful, huh?

You know what?

I don't give a flying fuck!

-This is how you speak to your father? -Yeah. So what?

This is how I talk when I'm treated like shit.

Restrain her.

-Go after Angie. -[man on receiver] copy.

Hold on.

Get out of my way.

-[henchman 1] Angie, just take it easy. -Move it, now!

[henchman 2] Missy, calm down.

-[henchman 1] Angie... -Fuck off!

-[grunt] -[henchman 2] Angie

[all grunting]

[Angie chuckles]

-[Angie bawls] -[men gasp]

[grunts]

[henchman 3] Oh, shit!

[overlapping shouting voices]

[loud crashing]

[Angie grunts, exhales]

Let me go!

Let me go! Do you have a death wish?

Miss Ni is secured.

Keep her locked in her room for now.

Boss Ni.

-Can you throw these away for me? -Uh-huh.

Thank you.

Hey!

[stutters] Mr. Xu... Sorry.

Please, take this jacket.

Oh, you don't have to.

Please. Please. It's cold out there.

Listen, you could catch a cold like me.

Look, I had a bad fever. It felt like I was crushed by a car.

It's not good. You don't wanna deal with that.

Here. Please. It's OK.

-Thank you. -[chuckles]

I'll wash it and return it to you later.

No, no. I have four jackets just like this one.

Four jackets?

I used to sell clothes in the night market square.

Oh, look...

I wanna tell you, your beer tastes bad,

but it sells well because you're the spokesguy.

Right on! Keep up the good work!

[Yi-Hang] Bye now.

Uh, Mr. Xu!

Um...

would you take a selfie with me?

One, two, three!

-Mr. Luo, you're so funny. -[Mr. Lou over the phone] Tomorrow then?

-Uh-huh. -I'll make the arrangements.

-Wonderful. OK. -[Mr. Lou] Alright. Let's grab coffee.

-That's great. -[Mr. Lou] Sounds good.

Bye-bye.

De Mei moved the Dielle Watch proposal meeting

to the day after tomorrow.

[woman] They did?

Do you ever actually check your email?

This is serious. The planning department needs to finish that proposal.

Get it done today.

Ms. Kwong, the planning department already left for the day.

Just deal with it.

-Is Yun Ling here yet? -[woman] Oh, sorry. She's waiting inside.

[Kwong] Great!

LING YUN, PEERLESS ELEGANCE THAT CANNOT BE COPIED

-[Kwong] Grab your things. Let's go. -[ringing tone]

[Kwong] Why is Yi-Hang not answering?

[automated voice] The number you dialed is not available.

Do I really have to go there?

Yes, you have to go there.

Why the long face?

Come on.

TAEKWONDO COMPETITION FIRST PLACE

Good effort, Ms. Angie.

[screams]

[soft piano music playing]

XU YI-HANG I LOVE YOU

[music continues]

[sighs]

[arcade game music playing from TV]

[Yi-Hang] Please, ask someone to get my car.

-It's at the motel behind the MRT station. -No problem. It's just...

Don't let anyone disturb me before noon tomorrow.

Sure, Mr. Xu, however--

-Not even by the cleaning lady. -Sure, Mr. Xu, but, Mr. Xu...

Hold on.

Finish your sentence.

Well, it's just that, sir,

your agent and Ms. Ling Yun are waiting for you upstairs.

That's great. Thanks!

[sighs]

[Kwong] What else do I have to explain?

This is to help you get more media exposure.

You've already given me your consent.

You asked me this when I was drunk. That isn't fair.

Maybe it is, and maybe it isn't.

Just try it. If you're regretting this, it's too late.

It's already in the newspapers and Entertainment Today.

It's just really weird spending the nights at his place.

We've known each other for so long. We don't like each other like that.

OK, why don't you pretend that you're staying at a friend's place?

Your virginity will remain intact.

Though if it wasn't, that would be a good thing.

You don't need to worry about this, OK?

What you need to do is tell me more about the blackmail letters.

What's there to explain?

Whatever this person is talking about is news to me.

I have no secrets, and I hold no grudges against anyone.

They're just sick and perverted.

I'll ask you once more.

Do you have any idea who sent those letters?

[Ling exhales]

You finally found your way home.

[alarm beeps]

Hey!

Where have you been? You look like a mess.

What's the problem?

We can talk after I shower.

Wait a minute. I've something to say.

Yi-Hang, what's been going on with you lately?

Are not you satisfied with all the work I'm getting you?

Are you just tired? You need some time off?

Whatever it is, I'd appreciate it if you'd tell me.

But, don't give the clients a reason to complain about your work ethic.

What are these people saying? These clients are full of crap.

If there's an issue, you come to me.

-You need to trust me to do my job! -OK.

Sorry.

I'm sorry.

I'll investigate the blackmail situation.

I'll dig through your fan pages, email, and your text messages.

If and when you receive any new threats, I want you to let me know immediately.

-[Ling] OK. -Good.

Hey, mister...

[Kwong sighs]

I've already leaked all of this to the paparazzi.

They'll be hiding out downstairs between 10 and 12 p.m. tomorrow.

Can you make sure to go downstairs at that time?

And you, go downstairs, too.

We need them to take intimate photos and write a good story.

So, what will you show them?

-[Ling] Intimacy. -Intimacy.

Good night.

-[Ling] Night. -Night. Bye-bye.

-[Yi-Hang sighs] -[alarm beeps]

Hey. Has that blackmail thing not ended?

Not yet.

Don't worry. She will handle it. It will be alright.

Mm-hmm. Yeah.

Why didn't you tell me my Yi-Hang was chilling there?

[Ding Ding] Are you serious? I sent you pictures forever ago.

You just got it now? I thought you would rush over here.

You don't get it! If I would have known, I would have...

Ugh!

[whispers] Forget it.

[Ding Ding] Hello? Wait, hello? Your signal sucks!

My signal? Your ass! You have the shitty reception.

[sighs] I have a giant fucking problem right now

and I'm really fucking annoyed!

[Ding Ding] What's going on?

[Angie sighs]

-My dad's arranged for me to be married. -He what?

Seriously?

To who?

Well, it's the, um...

the son of the Golden Dragon Boss that I maybe mentioned once.

-Oh! The really fat guy? -[Angie] That's right.

I really don't want to accept any arrangement my dad made.

-[Ding Ding] So, what are you gonna do? -What can I do?

Dad put me under house arrest in my room, so I can't go anywhere right now.

That's ridiculous.

If I were there, I'd figure out a way to escape.

Ah-ha!

Oh, boy, you are my smartest and cutest little pudding?

I'm gonna win you a boyfriend soon!

That's not something I'm looking for.

Angie?

Hey, Angie?

Hey, Ms. Angie?

Missy.

I don't see her ass anywhere. What the heck?

Hey, a new haircut? You just wanted a weird hairdo?

Be quiet and just stop making any kind of noises.

Good.

I want you to give me all your weapons.

-Hurry the hell up. -OK!

Too girly. I don't want this thing.

Now, give me all of your money.

[Gui groans]

Now, kindly remove all of your clothes.

Wait, that's not right.

I know I don't play hard to get, but I'm still a virgin.

No, you dumbbell. I just need your outfit.

Don't tease me.

Here.

-Thanks. -Mm-hmm.

Your pants.

Come on.

The pants, too?

Oh! You're disguising yourself as me to escape?

What's the matter? Can't I?

Well, wish me luck,

because when your father finds out, he'll bitch-slap me good.

You can either get bitch-slapped by dad, or by me.

-Your choice. -[Gui groans]

Do me a favor, please, knock me the hell out -

it'll be easier to explain.

OK.

Help me take care of those two morons in my way.

Oh, alright. Yeah.

Hey! You two at the door! Get lost!

Midnight party?

You're paying!

[body hitting ground]

Rest in peace.

[footsteps approaching]

SOPHIA KWONG, CEO, PLAN-E

-[henchman 1] You sing really well. -[henchman 2] You think so?

-[henchman 1] Mr. Gui. -[henchman 2] Mr. Gui.

-[henchman 1] Night. -[henchman 2] Night.

[indiscernible chatter]

[henchman 3 snoring]

[henchman 3 continues snoring]

-Is it finished? -Ready, ready, ready for you.

Is the commercial shoot for Ling Yun all taken care of?

It's all set. I've gone through the rundown and sent it earlier.

OK. And has legal checked the contract for Yi-Hang's airline commercial?

Yeah, they have. It'll be ready next week though.

-Why are they waiting until next week? -It's because they will be on vacation.

I'm not putting up with that. Please, show that to the lawyer.

-Alright. -Hm.

Oh, Ms. Kwong? Can I go home now?

-Bye. -[laughs]

[cell phone beeps]

AUNTIE, THIS IS ANGIE

REGARDING THE BODYGUARD YOU NEED, LET'S TALK

SEE YOU AT THE TEMPLE IN AN HOUR

PHEONIX TAOIST TEMPLE

-[thug1] Mr. He. -[thug 2] Mr. He.

-[thug 3] Hey, boys. -[thug 1] Let's have some sausages.

[thug 3] Check out that sexy ho!

-We'll warm her up for you. -Yeah, we'll reel her in.

[thus 3] I'm gonna go get some sausages.

Hey, little mama. Mm!

You alone?

Huh? Our boss thinks you're fine. He's a good time.

Yeah, that's our man!

Ta-da!

You're riding solo?

Yo, our boss has got sick wheels and sicker moves.

-He's wild as that jacket. Wild thing. -[mimics engine revving]

[thug1] Come ride with us. How about joining?

[Radish] Mr. Gui, sir? Can we finally kick some douche ass?

[sighs] What's going on? Let me see.

Just a bunch of pussies. Chill! We can sit this one out.

No worries. She can handle it.

-OK. -Let her give them a good workout.

Damn. My beautiful cheek.

[thug 3] Ah, don't be frigid. We'll show you a ride you won't forget.

Yeah, you don't need to talk. We're buying sausages to spare.

You look like you'd fancy our sausages.

We got sour, salty, bitter, spicy--

-[loud bang] -[thug 3] What's the matter?

[thug 3] What now?

[thug 3] What's wrong?

I'll see you later, boys.

-[thug 2] Where are you going? -[thug 3] Hold on.

Aunt Kwong, it's noisy here.

-Let's talk up there. -Mm-hmm.

[loud bang]

-You big tease. -Chill the fuck down.

-[thug 2] Come the fuck back, girl. -[thug 3] We got sausages.

Here's good.

Well, Aunt Kwong...

Call me Ms. Kwong.

Oh...

-Ms. Kwong... -Did your father change his mind?

Um, well, technically...

he did not.

Then why did you text me?

I just needed to ask you one question.

Did you wanna hire my Dad as a bodyguard or yours truly?

-You. -Then you should only speak to me!

OK, I'm all ears.

So, what do you want to discuss, kid?

I'm not a child anymore.

I'm 25. Refer to me as just "Angie" now.

OK, just Angie.

What I'm trying to say is,

as a modern woman, I should be independent, assertive,

have a career of my own, and not be judged or limited by any man...

just like you.

[chuckles]

That's sweet, Angie.

So, you think being a bodyguard will make you a modern woman?

Well, it's a start. A girl has to start somewhere.

Right?

So, give me a chance to become a modern woman.

I would love to hire you.

-But not without your father's permission. -Ms. Kuang, about that.

We're at a temple. So, I think we should let the gods decide.

If the gods says yes, it's a deal.

If the gods say no, well, I'll go straight home. What do you say?

-How then? -Moon blocks!

[temple bell rings]

-What's with this family and moon blocks? -What?

-Nothing. -[Mr. He] Hey, girl!

You think you're hot shit standing so high?

Think you're such a tough girl?

Come down and teach me how to ride! Come on girl! Let's get it on, bitch!

-[hisses] -Who are they? What do they want?

Ms. Kwong, don't worry about those bozos.

[thug 3] Let's go.

Alright then. Moon blocks.

That's fine but let's follow tradition.

If you can get ten yes's in a row, I will hire you.

-[tires screech] -Ten yes's is way too easy.

-Let's raise the bar. -What are you thinking?

[gun cocks]

-[tires screeching] -[engine revving]

Boom!

So, I'm hired?