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1
00:00:10,300 --> 00:00:13,180
Step one:
reconnaissance.
2
00:00:13,180 --> 00:00:15,060
First you need to identify
your target.
3
00:00:19,060 --> 00:00:20,220
How about her?
4
00:00:22,020 --> 00:00:23,580
No, she's not planning on
taking anything
5
00:00:23,580 --> 00:00:25,500
home with her tonight.
6
00:00:28,260 --> 00:00:29,820
What about that
hottie down there?
7
00:00:31,740 --> 00:00:32,700
Nope.
8
00:00:32,700 --> 00:00:34,620
Not buying.
9
00:00:36,060 --> 00:00:37,020
There.
10
00:00:37,100 --> 00:00:38,620
How about this guy?
11
00:00:38,740 --> 00:00:39,700
Maybe.
12
00:00:39,780 --> 00:00:42,900
But he looks like the type of
guy that would lowball me.
13
00:00:43,100 --> 00:00:44,820
Service manager,
line three.
14
00:00:45,020 --> 00:00:46,940
Service manager,
line three.
15
00:00:47,420 --> 00:00:48,380
There.
16
00:00:48,740 --> 00:00:50,300
She's the one.
17
00:00:50,580 --> 00:00:52,220
I bet I'll have her sold
in less than five minutes.
18
00:00:52,220 --> 00:00:53,900
Come on.
19
00:00:53,900 --> 00:00:55,740
Not only that,
20
00:00:55,740 --> 00:00:57,180
I'm gonna sell
her the flame car.
21
00:00:57,660 --> 00:00:58,820
No way.
22
00:00:59,780 --> 00:01:01,020
Watch this.
23
00:01:02,060 --> 00:01:04,340
Yes, Mrs. Kennedy,
I realize it's the only one
24
00:01:04,340 --> 00:01:07,220
in the city, and that is why
I'm holding it for you.
25
00:01:07,220 --> 00:01:09,140
You are going to
single-handedly
26
00:01:09,140 --> 00:01:11,060
make it stylish
for women to drive cars
27
00:01:11,060 --> 00:01:12,780
with flames on them.
28
00:01:13,380 --> 00:01:16,420
Exactly, more chic
than women smoking cigars.
29
00:01:16,820 --> 00:01:19,220
I promise you I will not
sell it to anyone else.
30
00:01:19,500 --> 00:01:20,260
You're very welcome.
31
00:01:20,260 --> 00:01:21,420
I'll see you in
half an hour.
32
00:01:21,620 --> 00:01:23,060
All right.
33
00:01:29,180 --> 00:01:31,460
Excuse me.
34
00:01:31,660 --> 00:01:33,860
Can you tell me
about this car here?
35
00:01:38,780 --> 00:01:40,220
Wow.
36
00:01:40,220 --> 00:01:41,540
You got her digits, too,
didn't you?
37
00:01:41,660 --> 00:01:42,620
Mm-hmm.
38
00:01:42,620 --> 00:01:44,340
I don't know
how you do it.
39
00:01:44,540 --> 00:01:46,340
Hate to admit it, man,
but it's my dad.
40
00:01:46,460 --> 00:01:47,900
That's why
he owns the place.
41
00:01:47,900 --> 00:01:49,340
Hey, your dad's got
about a dozen more
42
00:01:49,340 --> 00:01:50,700
flame cars in the back.
43
00:01:50,700 --> 00:01:52,500
You care which color I bring
out next to the showroom?
44
00:01:52,500 --> 00:01:53,940
Your call.
45
00:02:07,660 --> 00:02:09,100
Good to see you,
Mrs. Cranston.
46
00:02:09,100 --> 00:02:10,540
David, I missed you.
47
00:02:10,540 --> 00:02:12,300
I missed you, too.
48
00:02:17,580 --> 00:02:19,980
David.
49
00:02:19,980 --> 00:02:21,900
I'm surprised you remember
how to find the place.
50
00:02:21,900 --> 00:02:23,100
Where is he?
51
00:02:23,100 --> 00:02:24,620
He's in
the game room.
52
00:02:24,980 --> 00:02:26,700
He's expecting you.
53
00:02:27,380 --> 00:02:29,300
You two haven't
spoken in how long?
54
00:02:29,300 --> 00:02:31,500
And you think I'm just
gonna let you show up
55
00:02:31,540 --> 00:02:32,460
and surprise him?
56
00:02:34,780 --> 00:02:37,180
I hear you're gonna drag my
husband out again tonight.
57
00:02:37,260 --> 00:02:38,980
Yup, just gonna
play a little poker
58
00:02:38,980 --> 00:02:40,260
at the dealership
with the boys.
59
00:02:40,340 --> 00:02:42,700
That's on his list of approved
activities, isn't it?
60
00:02:43,060 --> 00:02:44,860
Don't even try
and play me
61
00:02:44,900 --> 00:02:47,100
like you play your little
bimbos, okay?
62
00:02:47,100 --> 00:02:48,540
Rob already caved.
63
00:02:48,900 --> 00:02:51,020
I know all about
your plans.
64
00:02:51,020 --> 00:02:52,140
I don't know what
you're talking about.
65
00:02:52,540 --> 00:02:53,300
Huh.
66
00:02:53,300 --> 00:02:55,780
I'm sure you're gonna find
quality ladies at...
67
00:02:55,780 --> 00:02:57,300
What's the name of
that club Rob told me?
68
00:02:57,300 --> 00:02:59,340
I think it was Imagine.
69
00:03:03,860 --> 00:03:05,260
Image.
70
00:03:05,260 --> 00:03:06,620
And we're going to
a nicer club this time.
71
00:03:06,700 --> 00:03:07,580
Why?
72
00:03:07,580 --> 00:03:10,140
To find nicer bimbos?
73
00:03:10,140 --> 00:03:11,500
Okay.
74
00:03:11,860 --> 00:03:13,420
He's married, David.
75
00:03:13,420 --> 00:03:15,100
Stop dragging him
to these things.
76
00:03:24,460 --> 00:03:26,300
Hey, hey, I've been trying to
get a hold of you, David.
77
00:03:26,300 --> 00:03:29,220
I think he had a mild
stroke about an hour ago.
78
00:03:29,220 --> 00:03:31,060
What, what?
79
00:03:33,020 --> 00:03:33,740
Oh, my... oh, my God.
80
00:03:33,740 --> 00:03:35,140
Oh, Grandpa!
81
00:03:36,460 --> 00:03:37,900
Oh, Grandpa.
82
00:03:38,380 --> 00:03:39,260
Grandpa.
83
00:03:39,260 --> 00:03:41,900
Hey, Grandpa, can your hear me,
are you all right?
84
00:03:41,900 --> 00:03:42,940
Oh, my God,
I can't believe this.
85
00:03:42,940 --> 00:03:45,340
I'm so sorry, Grandpa.
86
00:03:45,820 --> 00:03:47,700
You were like
a father to me.
87
00:03:47,700 --> 00:03:50,140
I love you so much.
88
00:03:50,140 --> 00:03:53,140
Da... vid...
89
00:03:53,140 --> 00:03:54,300
Da... David, yeah.
90
00:03:54,380 --> 00:03:56,100
Grandpa, it's me,
it's David.
91
00:03:56,100 --> 00:03:57,540
I...
92
00:03:58,020 --> 00:03:59,940
I...
93
00:03:59,940 --> 00:04:01,380
got...
94
00:04:01,380 --> 00:04:02,820
you.
95
00:04:02,820 --> 00:04:04,260
I got you, yes.
96
00:04:04,260 --> 00:04:05,220
Of course you've got me,
Grandpa.
97
00:04:05,220 --> 00:04:07,140
I'm right here.
98
00:04:07,140 --> 00:04:08,540
I got you!
99
00:04:11,220 --> 00:04:12,740
You sick son of a bitch.
100
00:04:12,740 --> 00:04:14,300
I can't believe
you did that.
101
00:04:14,300 --> 00:04:16,300
I can't believe
you fell for that.
102
00:04:16,300 --> 00:04:18,220
You think they'd just leave
me sitting out here
103
00:04:18,220 --> 00:04:19,700
after I just
had a stroke?
104
00:04:19,700 --> 00:04:20,740
All right,
this was a bad idea.
105
00:04:21,100 --> 00:04:23,740
No, no, no, don't go.
106
00:04:23,740 --> 00:04:26,620
I'm sorry,
it was a bad joke.
107
00:04:26,900 --> 00:04:29,180
I'm sorry.
108
00:04:29,980 --> 00:04:31,220
But I gotta say,
109
00:04:31,420 --> 00:04:33,340
it was nice having the old
David back for a moment
110
00:04:33,420 --> 00:04:35,220
and hearing
such nice things.
111
00:04:35,220 --> 00:04:37,220
There's no old David.
112
00:04:38,660 --> 00:04:41,580
Okay, it's just me.
113
00:04:41,580 --> 00:04:43,500
Well, how have you been?
114
00:04:43,500 --> 00:04:45,420
Fine... you?
115
00:04:45,420 --> 00:04:47,820
Oh, my dentures
don't fit
116
00:04:47,820 --> 00:04:50,220
and I'm growing a bunion.
117
00:04:50,700 --> 00:04:52,140
But I ain't got
hemorrhoids.
118
00:04:52,140 --> 00:04:54,540
So I guess
I can't complain.
119
00:04:54,540 --> 00:04:56,940
It's these others
who are sick.
120
00:04:56,940 --> 00:04:58,860
It's depressing.
121
00:04:58,860 --> 00:05:01,260
I hope I don't look like
that when I'm their age.
122
00:05:01,260 --> 00:05:03,660
You're 84,
you are their age.
123
00:05:03,660 --> 00:05:05,580
They're in their 90s.
124
00:05:06,060 --> 00:05:08,420
Hell, that guy over there
I think's 150.
125
00:05:08,420 --> 00:05:10,900
He knows too much
about the Civil War.
126
00:05:13,260 --> 00:05:16,100
You still in that
crappy job of yours,
127
00:05:16,100 --> 00:05:18,020
selling cars with
your dad?
128
00:05:21,860 --> 00:05:23,780
Play some chess
like the old days?
129
00:05:25,540 --> 00:05:27,140
Do you know
what today is?
130
00:05:31,060 --> 00:05:32,980
She was my wife,
David.
131
00:05:32,980 --> 00:05:34,300
Of course I know.
132
00:05:34,860 --> 00:05:37,740
It's been two years,
Grandpa.
133
00:05:37,740 --> 00:05:41,100
Carrie tells me that
you don't talk to anyone.
134
00:05:41,100 --> 00:05:42,540
You sit around
sad all day.
135
00:05:42,540 --> 00:05:44,780
You can't
go on like this.
136
00:05:44,780 --> 00:05:46,780
I'm lost without her.
137
00:05:46,780 --> 00:05:49,260
Sometimes it's hard to
get through the day.
138
00:05:51,660 --> 00:05:53,580
I can't take it anymore.
139
00:05:55,500 --> 00:05:58,780
You know, last week,
I almost tried to end it.
140
00:05:58,780 --> 00:06:00,300
- Off myself.
- That's not funny.
141
00:06:00,300 --> 00:06:02,220
Don't you wanna
know how?
142
00:06:02,220 --> 00:06:03,660
Straight razor.
143
00:06:03,660 --> 00:06:04,620
I figured, well,
if I'm gonna go,
144
00:06:05,100 --> 00:06:06,540
it's got to be
dramatic.
145
00:06:06,540 --> 00:06:07,500
A big, bloody mess.
146
00:06:07,500 --> 00:06:10,380
All right, enough,
Grandpa, okay.
147
00:06:10,380 --> 00:06:13,980
This has
gone on far too long.
148
00:06:13,980 --> 00:06:16,220
It's time that
you started
149
00:06:16,220 --> 00:06:20,220
socializing with women.
150
00:06:20,220 --> 00:06:24,380
Oh, no,
I'm too old.
151
00:06:24,380 --> 00:06:26,180
Grandma told me you
promised her.
152
00:06:28,620 --> 00:06:30,060
Yeah.
153
00:06:30,060 --> 00:06:31,980
Yeah, I did.
154
00:06:31,980 --> 00:06:35,820
And I never broke a promise
to that sweet woman.
155
00:06:35,820 --> 00:06:38,580
And I tried,
but I just couldn't.
156
00:06:40,260 --> 00:06:42,660
Well, I promised her
something, too.
157
00:06:43,140 --> 00:06:44,580
That I would
help you keep your promise
158
00:06:44,580 --> 00:06:46,860
to her if you
couldn't.
159
00:06:47,340 --> 00:06:48,940
Well, I'm gonna help you.
160
00:06:48,940 --> 00:06:51,340
You're gonna help me?
161
00:06:51,340 --> 00:06:53,260
Who's gonna help you?
162
00:06:53,260 --> 00:06:55,180
No offense, David,
but you never were
163
00:06:55,180 --> 00:06:57,940
a real Rudolph Valentino
with the women.
164
00:06:58,420 --> 00:07:00,820
Actually, Grandpa, you might
find this hard to believe,
165
00:07:00,820 --> 00:07:02,260
but over the past few years,
166
00:07:02,260 --> 00:07:04,700
I've become quite
the chick magnet.
167
00:07:04,700 --> 00:07:07,980
Yeah, that is hard for me
to believe.
168
00:07:07,980 --> 00:07:09,900
What are you
doing tonight?
169
00:07:09,900 --> 00:07:12,260
Oh, I got big plans tonight.
170
00:07:12,260 --> 00:07:15,580
"60 Minutes" is doing an
Andy Rooney retrospective.
171
00:07:15,580 --> 00:07:17,740
Well, you can record it.
172
00:07:17,740 --> 00:07:20,220
Because, like it or not,
we're going out.
173
00:07:20,700 --> 00:07:21,860
- We are?
- Yup.
174
00:07:23,780 --> 00:07:27,140
If you wanna win
the game with women,
175
00:07:27,140 --> 00:07:28,580
you first have
to learn
176
00:07:29,060 --> 00:07:30,500
how to play the game.
177
00:07:30,500 --> 00:07:32,900
I'm gonna teach you
every trick I've got.
178
00:07:34,780 --> 00:07:36,220
Swell.
179
00:07:36,220 --> 00:07:37,660
Where are we going?
180
00:07:38,140 --> 00:07:41,420
Well, if you wanna
meet women...
181
00:07:41,420 --> 00:07:43,460
you go where
the women meet.
182
00:07:50,260 --> 00:07:51,700
Yo, Sergio.
183
00:07:51,700 --> 00:07:55,060
I need two drafts and a glass
of hot water with lemon.
184
00:08:01,780 --> 00:08:05,140
So... I saw your wife
at the home today.
185
00:08:05,140 --> 00:08:06,100
Lovely as usual.
186
00:08:06,580 --> 00:08:07,540
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
187
00:08:07,540 --> 00:08:09,460
You went with
the poker story, right?
188
00:08:09,460 --> 00:08:10,900
Yeah, and she told me
you caved already.
189
00:08:10,900 --> 00:08:12,820
What?
190
00:08:12,820 --> 00:08:14,260
Please say
you didn't tell her.
191
00:08:14,260 --> 00:08:15,700
You know how she hates
when I go rolling
192
00:08:15,700 --> 00:08:16,660
for honeys with you!
193
00:08:17,020 --> 00:08:17,780
She told me you
caved already!
194
00:08:17,780 --> 00:08:19,220
Oh, what?
195
00:08:19,220 --> 00:08:21,140
You idiot, I didn't cave.
196
00:08:21,140 --> 00:08:22,580
You caved!
197
00:08:22,580 --> 00:08:25,460
Oh, she... she totally
played you.
198
00:08:25,460 --> 00:08:26,700
Damn it.
199
00:08:26,900 --> 00:08:28,820
Damn it.
200
00:08:43,620 --> 00:08:46,020
There you go.
201
00:08:46,020 --> 00:08:46,980
All right.
202
00:08:46,980 --> 00:08:48,420
What are you expecting,
a flood?
203
00:08:48,420 --> 00:08:49,860
Come on.
204
00:08:49,860 --> 00:08:52,260
There you go.
205
00:08:52,260 --> 00:08:53,700
Okay.
206
00:08:55,900 --> 00:08:56,860
You okay there?
207
00:08:57,060 --> 00:08:58,300
Hemorrhoids.
208
00:08:58,500 --> 00:09:00,420
No, I don't have
hemorrhoids.
209
00:09:00,420 --> 00:09:01,860
I'm avoiding them.
210
00:09:01,860 --> 00:09:03,260
Ahh!
211
00:09:03,260 --> 00:09:05,620
Did you know the average
person experiences
212
00:09:05,660 --> 00:09:07,060
over three "G"s of pressure
213
00:09:07,100 --> 00:09:09,140
in their butt
as they sit down?
214
00:09:09,180 --> 00:09:11,060
Uh, no,
no, I didn't know that.
215
00:09:11,100 --> 00:09:13,940
Yeah, the slower you sit,
the less "G"s.
216
00:09:13,940 --> 00:09:16,580
The way I do it, it's like
I'm sitting on the moon.
217
00:09:16,580 --> 00:09:17,780
That's fascinating,
Mr. Ward.
218
00:09:17,820 --> 00:09:21,140
You're full of
interesting factoids.
219
00:09:21,180 --> 00:09:23,540
The Discovery Channel
never lets me down.
220
00:09:23,580 --> 00:09:26,420
And not only that...
221
00:09:26,420 --> 00:09:27,460
Whoa!
222
00:09:27,500 --> 00:09:30,740
I was an apprentice to
Harry Houdini back in the day.
223
00:09:30,740 --> 00:09:31,700
It's...
224
00:09:31,740 --> 00:09:33,220
It's true, David.
225
00:09:33,260 --> 00:09:34,180
I was in
the tank with him
226
00:09:34,220 --> 00:09:35,620
at the Shelton for
his last show.
227
00:09:35,660 --> 00:09:37,540
He taught me
everything he knew.
228
00:09:37,580 --> 00:09:39,220
The secret to the
milk-can escape...
229
00:09:39,260 --> 00:09:41,220
Are you ready to
get to work, Grandpa?
230
00:09:41,260 --> 00:09:42,660
Oh, yes, sir.
231
00:09:42,700 --> 00:09:44,100
- Ready and waiting.
- Okay, good.
232
00:09:44,620 --> 00:09:46,500
Step one...
233
00:09:50,060 --> 00:09:51,940
Step one:
reconnaissance.
234
00:09:51,980 --> 00:09:54,660
First you need to
identify your target.
235
00:09:54,660 --> 00:09:57,060
I go for a nice-looking,
intelligent girl
236
00:09:57,060 --> 00:09:59,940
who I think can keep up
with me intellectually.
237
00:09:59,940 --> 00:10:01,780
What about her?
238
00:10:02,780 --> 00:10:04,180
Nice, but she's
drinking red wine,
239
00:10:04,220 --> 00:10:06,500
and I like this shirt
way too much.
240
00:10:06,540 --> 00:10:08,020
Ultimately,
I give up on the nice girl
241
00:10:08,060 --> 00:10:08,980
and go for the hot chick.
242
00:10:09,100 --> 00:10:10,580
What? Metamucil?
243
00:10:10,620 --> 00:10:11,540
Oh, forgive me.
244
00:10:11,580 --> 00:10:12,580
Where are my manners?
245
00:10:12,580 --> 00:10:14,100
Oh, that's...
246
00:10:14,100 --> 00:10:16,020
Oh, no, no, no...
Okay. Cool.
247
00:10:21,300 --> 00:10:22,740
Oh. There.
248
00:10:27,460 --> 00:10:30,260
All right, now,
step two:
249
00:10:30,300 --> 00:10:31,700
the approach.
250
00:10:31,740 --> 00:10:34,020
You have to meet her,
or, more accurately,
251
00:10:34,060 --> 00:10:35,460
you have her meet you.
252
00:10:35,500 --> 00:10:36,900
Planned spontaneity,
Grandpa.
253
00:10:36,940 --> 00:10:38,340
That's the name of the game.
254
00:10:41,660 --> 00:10:44,980
You gotta have her thinking
that she discovered you.
255
00:10:45,020 --> 00:10:47,860
If she knows you're
pursuing her, it's all over.
256
00:10:48,860 --> 00:10:50,260
- Excuse me.
- Oh!
257
00:10:50,300 --> 00:10:52,180
Oh, my God,
I am so sorry.
258
00:10:52,220 --> 00:10:53,140
That jerk-face.
259
00:10:53,660 --> 00:10:54,580
Sure it's childish.
260
00:10:54,620 --> 00:10:56,500
But if you find a woman
drinking club soda,
261
00:10:56,540 --> 00:10:58,900
the shirt
practically cleans itself.
262
00:10:58,940 --> 00:11:01,300
Here, let me buy you
a drink.
263
00:11:01,340 --> 00:11:02,740
- All right.
- Come on.
264
00:11:02,780 --> 00:11:04,660
Step three:
the buildup.
265
00:11:04,700 --> 00:11:06,580
You gotta get her
interested in you.
266
00:11:06,620 --> 00:11:08,020
And that's easy.
267
00:11:08,060 --> 00:11:09,940
You just show her
how smart you are.
268
00:11:09,980 --> 00:11:11,860
You know, I never understood
why this salt thing
269
00:11:11,900 --> 00:11:14,260
takes out stains.
270
00:11:14,300 --> 00:11:18,100
Well, salt is actually
sodium chloride
271
00:11:18,140 --> 00:11:19,540
and the water from the stain
272
00:11:19,580 --> 00:11:22,420
sublimates
the molecule's ionic bonds,
273
00:11:22,460 --> 00:11:26,260
which releases energy
and cleans the stain.
274
00:11:26,300 --> 00:11:28,100
Sometimes you gotta
make stuff up.
275
00:11:28,620 --> 00:11:30,020
But if you
say it with confidence,
276
00:11:30,060 --> 00:11:31,460
it's safe to assume they're not
gonna look it up
277
00:11:31,500 --> 00:11:33,380
to see if you're right.
278
00:11:33,380 --> 00:11:34,820
Sergio, Sergio.
279
00:11:34,820 --> 00:11:37,220
Step four:
the follow-through.
280
00:11:37,220 --> 00:11:39,140
Just in case things don't
go well that night,
281
00:11:39,460 --> 00:11:41,460
always have some
reason to see her again.
282
00:11:41,460 --> 00:11:42,900
David, I almost forgot.
283
00:11:43,380 --> 00:11:45,780
You won a sweet item from
the charity raffle last month.
284
00:11:45,780 --> 00:11:46,740
Congrats.
285
00:11:46,980 --> 00:11:48,260
Thank you, that's great.
286
00:11:50,660 --> 00:11:52,100
It's dinner for two
at Charlie Trotter's.
287
00:11:52,100 --> 00:11:53,540
This is my mom's favorite
restaurant.
288
00:11:53,580 --> 00:11:54,980
She'll be so excited.
289
00:11:55,020 --> 00:11:56,900
Oh, that's so sweet.
290
00:11:56,940 --> 00:11:58,820
Oh, no, it expires
on Sunday
291
00:11:58,860 --> 00:12:01,700
and she's
out of town this weekend.
292
00:12:01,740 --> 00:12:03,620
This sucks.
293
00:12:07,500 --> 00:12:09,860
Hey, you know what...
294
00:12:09,860 --> 00:12:12,740
she can't use 'em, there's no
use letting 'em go to waste.
295
00:12:12,740 --> 00:12:16,100
Would you like to go?
296
00:12:16,100 --> 00:12:18,020
Sure, I'd love to.
297
00:12:18,020 --> 00:12:19,460
Great.
298
00:12:19,940 --> 00:12:22,820
Just take somebody who
appreciates good food.
299
00:12:24,900 --> 00:12:28,180
This move is like
the Jedi mind trick.
300
00:12:28,180 --> 00:12:29,940
"Why don't you
go with me?
301
00:12:29,940 --> 00:12:31,540
They're your certificates."
302
00:12:33,540 --> 00:12:35,940
Well, hey, they're
your certificates.
303
00:12:35,940 --> 00:12:37,380
Why don't you go with me?
304
00:12:40,260 --> 00:12:42,100
And the most important step?
305
00:12:42,100 --> 00:12:45,060
Step five:
the Groucho effect.
306
00:12:45,060 --> 00:12:46,020
Groucho Marx once said,
307
00:12:46,500 --> 00:12:47,460
"I wouldn't
belong to any club
308
00:12:47,460 --> 00:12:49,380
that would have me
as a member."
309
00:12:49,860 --> 00:12:51,300
Well, it was very nice
meeting you, Susan,
310
00:12:51,300 --> 00:12:52,820
and I look
forward to dinner.
311
00:12:52,820 --> 00:12:54,260
Leaving so soon?
312
00:12:54,260 --> 00:12:56,020
If you show interest
in a girl too soon,
313
00:12:56,580 --> 00:12:58,500
if she gets into
the club too easily,
314
00:12:58,500 --> 00:12:59,940
she thinks she can
do better.
315
00:12:59,940 --> 00:13:01,380
You know what?
316
00:13:01,380 --> 00:13:03,540
I promised my girlfriend I
would try and stop by tonight.
317
00:13:03,540 --> 00:13:05,460
Your girlfriend?
318
00:13:05,460 --> 00:13:08,260
But if you make her work
to get into the club,
319
00:13:08,260 --> 00:13:10,660
she thinks she's
lucky to get you.
320
00:13:10,660 --> 00:13:12,900
Why don't you stay for just
one more glass of wine?
321
00:13:12,900 --> 00:13:13,940
You know what?
322
00:13:14,420 --> 00:13:16,260
I'd love to,
but I really shouldn't.
323
00:13:16,420 --> 00:13:18,900
It's extremely difficult
and a bit of a gamble.
324
00:13:19,380 --> 00:13:21,300
But if you have patience
and play the game right,
325
00:13:21,300 --> 00:13:22,740
it pays off.
326
00:13:22,740 --> 00:13:24,180
Come on.
327
00:13:24,180 --> 00:13:26,340
One more glass isn't
gonna kill you, is it?
328
00:13:26,340 --> 00:13:27,780
And when she fills your
wine glass
329
00:13:28,260 --> 00:13:30,180
slightly more than hers,
330
00:13:30,180 --> 00:13:32,740
it means she wants to take
advantage of you.
331
00:13:32,740 --> 00:13:33,700
That's when
you know you've won.
332
00:13:33,700 --> 00:13:34,660
Cheers.
333
00:13:35,140 --> 00:13:36,580
Game over.
334
00:13:40,940 --> 00:13:42,980
Watching you
in action last night,
335
00:13:42,980 --> 00:13:44,980
David, was amazing.
336
00:13:44,980 --> 00:13:46,900
Just amazing.
337
00:13:46,900 --> 00:13:48,820
Rob get you home okay?
338
00:13:48,820 --> 00:13:49,780
Forget about me.
339
00:13:49,780 --> 00:13:52,660
I wanna hear
what happened with you.
340
00:13:52,660 --> 00:13:54,580
Well, let me
put it this way.
341
00:13:54,580 --> 00:13:55,620
Look what I'm wearing.
342
00:13:57,940 --> 00:14:00,820
It's the same clothes
I wore last night.
343
00:14:00,820 --> 00:14:03,220
Well, I'll be glad to pay
for some new clothes
344
00:14:03,220 --> 00:14:04,500
if things are
a little tight.
345
00:14:04,500 --> 00:14:06,900
No, I didn't
change clothes
346
00:14:06,900 --> 00:14:08,740
from last night.
347
00:14:08,740 --> 00:14:10,580
Talk about lazy.
348
00:14:10,580 --> 00:14:12,020
Think, Grandpa.
349
00:14:12,020 --> 00:14:12,980
Think.
350
00:14:13,460 --> 00:14:15,140
Why didn't
I change clothes?
351
00:14:20,420 --> 00:14:21,860
Ohh!
352
00:14:21,860 --> 00:14:23,780
Oh, you devil, you!
353
00:14:24,740 --> 00:14:25,700
All right, all right.
354
00:14:25,780 --> 00:14:27,220
Listen.
355
00:14:27,380 --> 00:14:29,780
Step one:
reconnaissance.
356
00:14:29,780 --> 00:14:32,100
Do you know what kind of
woman you wanna meet?
357
00:14:32,100 --> 00:14:34,660
Yeah, your grandmother.
358
00:14:35,220 --> 00:14:37,620
Let me explain
something to you, David.
359
00:14:37,620 --> 00:14:39,540
I'm not gonna
waste my time
360
00:14:39,540 --> 00:14:41,460
on just anybody.
361
00:14:41,460 --> 00:14:43,380
I have needs,
you see.
362
00:14:43,380 --> 00:14:45,700
Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa.
363
00:14:45,700 --> 00:14:47,620
Hold on.
364
00:14:48,100 --> 00:14:49,060
Needs?
365
00:14:49,060 --> 00:14:50,500
Are you...
366
00:14:50,500 --> 00:14:52,900
are you saying that
you can still...
367
00:14:53,380 --> 00:14:54,260
do the wild thing?
368
00:14:54,260 --> 00:14:55,300
The what thing?
369
00:14:55,300 --> 00:14:59,380
That you're still
able to... perform.
370
00:14:59,380 --> 00:15:00,900
On stage?
371
00:15:01,380 --> 00:15:02,820
In bed.
372
00:15:03,300 --> 00:15:05,620
Oh...
373
00:15:06,100 --> 00:15:07,060
No way.
374
00:15:07,060 --> 00:15:08,500
Are you kidding?
375
00:15:08,500 --> 00:15:11,380
That thing died years
before your grandmother did.
376
00:15:11,380 --> 00:15:14,100
Should have had it amputated
for all the good it does.
377
00:15:14,660 --> 00:15:17,140
So then what
are these needs?
378
00:15:17,140 --> 00:15:19,620
A man needs the real McCoy.
379
00:15:20,100 --> 00:15:22,180
The only thing
that matters.
380
00:15:22,660 --> 00:15:23,620
Beauty?
381
00:15:23,940 --> 00:15:25,780
What, brains?
382
00:15:26,260 --> 00:15:27,620
Companionship.
383
00:15:29,060 --> 00:15:31,620
Have you ever had a companion
in your life, David?
384
00:15:31,620 --> 00:15:33,300
Sure, I've dated
lots of girls.
385
00:15:33,300 --> 00:15:34,820
Oh, horse feathers.
386
00:15:34,820 --> 00:15:38,580
I mean a real
companion.
387
00:15:38,580 --> 00:15:41,060
Mmm, how would I know?
388
00:15:41,060 --> 00:15:44,900
There's only two ways to know
she's your real companion.
389
00:15:44,900 --> 00:15:47,300
You either know it
when you meet her,
390
00:15:47,780 --> 00:15:50,100
or know it
when you lose her.
391
00:15:50,100 --> 00:15:53,420
Your companion is a woman
you care about.
392
00:15:53,460 --> 00:15:56,300
A woman you could
call your best friend.
393
00:15:56,340 --> 00:15:58,740
A woman you could tell
anything to.
394
00:16:00,660 --> 00:16:04,580
A woman whose hand
you really want to hold.
395
00:16:04,580 --> 00:16:09,060
That's the first time we held
hands as man and wife.
396
00:16:09,060 --> 00:16:12,900
We didn't let go for
four hours and 23 minutes.
397
00:16:12,900 --> 00:16:14,820
I timed it.
398
00:16:14,820 --> 00:16:16,260
But eventually
nature called,
399
00:16:16,260 --> 00:16:18,660
and I had to let go.
400
00:16:18,660 --> 00:16:21,380
Your great-grandmother served
fried chicken at the reception
401
00:16:21,380 --> 00:16:24,700
that went through me
like a racecar.
402
00:16:24,740 --> 00:16:26,180
But the point is,
403
00:16:26,740 --> 00:16:29,620
that's what
your grandmother was to me.
404
00:16:29,620 --> 00:16:31,700
The old bearcat.
405
00:16:32,020 --> 00:16:34,100
Companion, huh?
406
00:16:34,100 --> 00:16:36,340
That's what
it's all about.
407
00:16:36,820 --> 00:16:38,660
And that's what I need.
408
00:16:42,340 --> 00:16:43,740
Oh, shoot.
409
00:16:43,780 --> 00:16:45,180
Where are you going?
410
00:16:45,220 --> 00:16:47,020
I'm so... I gotta
get to work, Grandpa.
411
00:16:47,060 --> 00:16:49,020
Dad's gonna kill me.
412
00:16:49,060 --> 00:16:52,660
Well, are you
coming back to help me?
413
00:16:52,660 --> 00:16:54,100
I already taught you
everything you need to know
414
00:16:54,100 --> 00:16:55,060
about meeting women.
415
00:16:55,060 --> 00:16:56,300
You just gotta
do it now.
416
00:16:56,820 --> 00:16:58,740
Will I see you again,
David?
417
00:16:58,740 --> 00:17:00,180
Sure.
418
00:17:00,180 --> 00:17:03,380
When?
419
00:17:03,380 --> 00:17:05,300
I don't know.
420
00:17:05,300 --> 00:17:06,740
Soon, okay?
421
00:17:06,740 --> 00:17:08,180
I'll see you soon.
422
00:17:12,500 --> 00:17:13,900
I don't care
if it's on hold.
423
00:17:13,940 --> 00:17:15,340
Take it off hold...
I got cash.
424
00:17:15,380 --> 00:17:17,260
I want this
flame car today.
425
00:17:17,780 --> 00:17:18,700
Pick up line two.
426
00:17:19,220 --> 00:17:20,620
Abby in the loan department.
427
00:17:21,460 --> 00:17:24,540
Sold another flame car.
428
00:17:24,580 --> 00:17:25,980
Sign it.
429
00:17:27,940 --> 00:17:29,820
How's the profit
on this one?
430
00:17:29,860 --> 00:17:32,420
18%.
431
00:17:32,420 --> 00:17:36,140
David...
you have the gift.
432
00:17:36,180 --> 00:17:38,940
Like that thing you do with
the customer where you say,
433
00:17:39,460 --> 00:17:42,780
"Oh, I'm sorry,
you can't have this car".
434
00:17:42,820 --> 00:17:44,580
I mean, that's beautiful.
435
00:17:44,580 --> 00:17:48,260
It's like you have
a sixth sense
436
00:17:48,260 --> 00:17:50,660
for reading and closing.
437
00:17:54,500 --> 00:17:56,540
How's your grandfather?
438
00:17:57,860 --> 00:18:00,540
Oh, you think
I'm an idiot.
439
00:18:00,580 --> 00:18:03,580
You buy him a place in
a retirement community,
440
00:18:03,620 --> 00:18:06,380
then he ignores you
all this time,
441
00:18:06,420 --> 00:18:09,780
and you come back
with an olive branch?
442
00:18:10,180 --> 00:18:12,020
Even your mother,
God rest her soul,
443
00:18:12,020 --> 00:18:14,420
she wouldn't want you to have
anything to do with him.
444
00:18:14,420 --> 00:18:16,860
All right, thanks
for the advice, Dick.
445
00:18:16,900 --> 00:18:19,100
Like I've told you, David.
446
00:18:19,140 --> 00:18:21,780
When it's just the two
of us here at work,
447
00:18:21,780 --> 00:18:24,020
you can call me Dad.
448
00:18:25,060 --> 00:18:26,460
Okay... Dick.
449
00:18:28,180 --> 00:18:30,180
Okay, bye.
450
00:18:31,300 --> 00:18:32,180
So not only did you blow
451
00:18:32,740 --> 00:18:33,700
"the poker night
with the guys" story,
452
00:18:34,180 --> 00:18:35,140
but your grandfather
told Carrie
453
00:18:35,140 --> 00:18:36,820
all the details
about last night.
454
00:18:36,820 --> 00:18:38,260
Hey, listen.
455
00:18:38,660 --> 00:18:40,460
I have only two joys
in this life.
456
00:18:40,500 --> 00:18:44,300
One is watching you be
the bachelor that I never was,
457
00:18:44,300 --> 00:18:45,740
and the other is being
458
00:18:45,780 --> 00:18:47,620
the pro football quarterback
that I never was.
459
00:18:47,620 --> 00:18:48,940
You realize
how sad that is?
460
00:18:48,980 --> 00:18:50,940
Carrie is freaking out.
461
00:18:51,460 --> 00:18:53,820
And now both
my joys are at risk.
462
00:18:53,860 --> 00:18:55,740
She's not gonna play
football tomorrow.
463
00:18:55,780 --> 00:18:57,180
I'm sorry, man.
464
00:18:57,220 --> 00:18:58,700
No, no,
no need to apologize.
465
00:18:58,700 --> 00:19:00,620
Because, as punishment for
screwing up,
466
00:19:00,660 --> 00:19:02,060
you're gonna sub for
her in tomorrow's game.
467
00:19:02,100 --> 00:19:03,100
Oh, come on.
468
00:19:03,140 --> 00:19:04,420
Yes, you are.
469
00:19:07,700 --> 00:19:10,500
Teams three and ten,
game on!
470
00:19:11,060 --> 00:19:12,020
Okay, guys, let's do this.
471
00:19:12,020 --> 00:19:14,420
James, you got
a scouting report?
472
00:19:14,420 --> 00:19:16,340
The ref called
the wrong team.
473
00:19:16,340 --> 00:19:17,780
We're not even supposed to
play these guys.
474
00:19:17,780 --> 00:19:19,700
So I don't
have any info.
475
00:19:19,700 --> 00:19:20,660
Whatever.
476
00:19:20,660 --> 00:19:22,580
Okay, let's see what
these guys are made of.
477
00:19:22,580 --> 00:19:24,500
Joanie, down and out.
478
00:19:24,500 --> 00:19:25,940
David, fake
and go long.
479
00:19:26,420 --> 00:19:28,340
Break.
480
00:19:28,340 --> 00:19:30,500
All right, let's go,
let's go.
481
00:19:35,620 --> 00:19:37,180
You're covering me?
482
00:19:38,220 --> 00:19:39,780
No, I didn't mean
anything sexist.
483
00:19:40,260 --> 00:19:41,940
I just wanna confirm,
you're covering me?
484
00:19:41,940 --> 00:19:44,140
You know, I bet I'm better at
this game than you are.
485
00:19:45,660 --> 00:19:47,100
I don't think so.
486
00:19:47,100 --> 00:19:48,860
Hike.
487
00:19:59,380 --> 00:20:00,900
Oh!
488
00:20:00,900 --> 00:20:02,820
What is that?
489
00:20:09,780 --> 00:20:11,700
I think so.
490
00:20:17,860 --> 00:20:20,260
Oh, your elbow's bleeding.
491
00:20:20,260 --> 00:20:22,660
Oh, it's a little
"abrusion".
492
00:20:23,140 --> 00:20:24,580
"Abrusion"?
493
00:20:24,580 --> 00:20:26,500
Yeah, you know, it's like
a bruise and an abrasion.
494
00:20:26,500 --> 00:20:28,900
It's a new word just released
by Webster's last week.
495
00:20:28,900 --> 00:20:30,340
Didn't get the memo.
496
00:20:30,340 --> 00:20:31,780
You will,
I'm on the committee.
497
00:20:31,780 --> 00:20:32,740
You sound very bright.
498
00:20:32,740 --> 00:20:33,700
Oh, yeah, I'm Mensa.
499
00:20:34,180 --> 00:20:35,140
Graduated eighth
in my class.
500
00:20:35,140 --> 00:20:36,100
Really?
501
00:20:36,100 --> 00:20:38,020
Huh, I was seventh.
502
00:20:41,260 --> 00:20:44,380
If you wanna
meet women,
503
00:20:44,780 --> 00:20:46,660
go where the women meet.
504
00:21:04,900 --> 00:21:07,780
Um... top...
505
00:21:07,780 --> 00:21:10,180
top of the morning
to you, ma'am.
506
00:21:10,660 --> 00:21:12,100
How are you today?
507
00:21:12,100 --> 00:21:13,540
I'm good.
508
00:21:13,540 --> 00:21:15,940
Can I help you?
509
00:21:15,940 --> 00:21:18,340
My name's Joe.
510
00:21:18,340 --> 00:21:21,220
And I was wondering,
uh...
511
00:21:21,220 --> 00:21:23,140
I was wondering
if you'd like to
512
00:21:23,140 --> 00:21:25,380
have lunch, talk a bit and...
513
00:21:25,380 --> 00:21:27,860
Oh, how sweet.
514
00:21:27,860 --> 00:21:30,980
How old are you, Joe?
515
00:21:30,980 --> 00:21:33,420
Uh, I'm 79.
516
00:21:33,420 --> 00:21:36,860
Well, I'm very
flattered, Joe.
517
00:21:36,860 --> 00:21:38,780
But I'm sorry.
518
00:21:38,780 --> 00:21:40,740
I don't
date older men.
519
00:21:40,740 --> 00:21:41,700
Older men?
520
00:21:41,700 --> 00:21:43,620
We might have
some fun for a while.
521
00:21:43,980 --> 00:21:45,500
But sooner or later,
you would get sick,
522
00:21:45,500 --> 00:21:48,100
and I'll be the one
that has to take care of you
523
00:21:48,100 --> 00:21:50,580
and eventually decide
whether or not
524
00:21:50,580 --> 00:21:52,500
to take you
off of life support.
525
00:21:52,740 --> 00:21:54,500
Been there, done that.
526
00:21:54,500 --> 00:21:56,420
I've earned my
inheritance already.
527
00:21:56,420 --> 00:22:00,060
But now that's too much
pressure for me.
528
00:22:00,060 --> 00:22:03,060
Now if you will excuse me,
529
00:22:03,060 --> 00:22:06,420
I'm late for
a game of mah-jongg.
530
00:22:06,420 --> 00:22:07,860
Bye-bye.
531
00:22:23,220 --> 00:22:24,660
You're covering me?
532
00:22:24,660 --> 00:22:26,100
Seventh in your class, huh?
533
00:22:26,100 --> 00:22:28,020
Quick, what's
the capital of Zambia?
534
00:22:28,500 --> 00:22:29,460
Lusaka.
535
00:22:29,460 --> 00:22:30,900
Right.
536
00:22:30,900 --> 00:22:33,300
Who's Bobby Brady's
first kiss with?
537
00:22:33,300 --> 00:22:34,260
Millicent.
538
00:22:34,260 --> 00:22:36,180
But very good question.
539
00:22:36,180 --> 00:22:38,100
King of England, 1630.
540
00:22:38,100 --> 00:22:40,500
- George V.
- Very impressive.
541
00:22:40,500 --> 00:22:43,380
You don't even know the answers
to these questions.
542
00:22:43,380 --> 00:22:44,820
I certainly do.
543
00:22:44,820 --> 00:22:48,180
James II was king
in 1630.
544
00:22:48,180 --> 00:22:49,500
Hike!
545
00:22:51,380 --> 00:22:53,860
I'm open!
546
00:22:54,340 --> 00:22:57,220
Go, Julie, go, go, go,
go, go, go!
547
00:23:01,300 --> 00:23:02,260
Game over!
548
00:23:02,260 --> 00:23:03,220
Blue team wins it.
549
00:23:03,220 --> 00:23:04,140
Let's move.
550
00:23:04,700 --> 00:23:06,620
All right, Blue!
551
00:23:06,620 --> 00:23:09,500
Yeah, nice pass.
552
00:23:09,500 --> 00:23:10,460
Nice.
553
00:23:10,460 --> 00:23:13,820
Way to show
her who's boss.
554
00:23:13,820 --> 00:23:15,260
She's a fast one,
isn't she?
555
00:23:15,260 --> 00:23:17,660
Nice rack, too.
556
00:23:17,660 --> 00:23:20,540
Intriguing.
557
00:23:20,540 --> 00:23:22,460
- Overthrow me?
- With pleasure.
558
00:23:25,820 --> 00:23:27,100
Oop.
559
00:23:27,660 --> 00:23:28,620
My bad.
560
00:23:30,540 --> 00:23:31,980
Here you go.
561
00:23:34,380 --> 00:23:36,300
Thanks.
562
00:23:36,780 --> 00:23:37,740
Thank you, come again.
563
00:23:38,220 --> 00:23:39,180
Next time, huh?
564
00:23:39,180 --> 00:23:40,620
I gotta go.
565
00:23:53,140 --> 00:23:55,220
Thank you.
566
00:23:55,220 --> 00:23:57,020
Oh, Rose.
567
00:23:57,020 --> 00:23:58,260
Over here, honey.
568
00:24:01,300 --> 00:24:02,740
That's my boyfriend.
569
00:24:03,220 --> 00:24:04,660
I've gotta go.
570
00:24:07,260 --> 00:24:09,660
A rose for Rose.
571
00:24:09,660 --> 00:24:11,100
Oh!
572
00:24:11,100 --> 00:24:12,540
Rose!
573
00:24:12,540 --> 00:24:13,980
Let's go.
574
00:24:26,180 --> 00:24:27,700
Hey, can we play
team three today?
575
00:24:27,700 --> 00:24:29,620
Sorry, bro,
schedule's set.
576
00:24:32,980 --> 00:24:35,300
This job gets better
and better every week.
577
00:24:37,780 --> 00:24:39,220
Ingenious plan.
578
00:24:39,220 --> 00:24:42,100
I guess it didn't include her
not showing up, did it?
579
00:24:44,500 --> 00:24:46,420
She ain't here.
580
00:24:47,860 --> 00:24:49,300
We're gonna kill them.
581
00:24:49,300 --> 00:24:50,260
Hey.
582
00:24:50,260 --> 00:24:52,660
Hey, I guess we're
playing you guys again.
583
00:24:52,660 --> 00:24:54,100
I wonder how that
happened, man.
584
00:24:54,100 --> 00:24:55,060
I don't know.
585
00:24:55,060 --> 00:24:56,500
Too bad you guys are
missing that superstar girl
586
00:24:56,500 --> 00:24:57,940
you had last week, huh?
587
00:24:57,940 --> 00:24:59,380
- What was her name?
- Julie Larabee.
588
00:24:59,380 --> 00:25:00,820
Julie Larabee,
that's right.
589
00:25:00,820 --> 00:25:01,780
Hey, listen,
we need a sub next week.
590
00:25:02,260 --> 00:25:03,700
Do any of you guys
have her number
591
00:25:03,700 --> 00:25:05,140
or an address or something?
592
00:25:05,140 --> 00:25:07,540
Sure, just get a hold of me
after the game, all right?
593
00:25:07,540 --> 00:25:09,340
Good luck, buddy.
594
00:25:11,420 --> 00:25:12,740
6:00 in the morning?
595
00:25:12,740 --> 00:25:15,860
Every morning
like clockwork.
596
00:25:15,860 --> 00:25:17,300
Thanks.
597
00:25:19,180 --> 00:25:20,620
Excuse me, ma'am.
598
00:25:20,620 --> 00:25:21,580
The tables are filling,
599
00:25:21,580 --> 00:25:24,700
so do you mind if
this gentleman joins you?
600
00:25:24,700 --> 00:25:26,500
How nice.
601
00:25:34,740 --> 00:25:36,740
And how are you
this fine evening?
602
00:25:36,740 --> 00:25:38,260
I'm nice.
603
00:25:38,260 --> 00:25:38,980
And you?
604
00:25:38,980 --> 00:25:40,500
Well, fantastic
605
00:25:40,500 --> 00:25:42,420
now that I've
had the opportunity
606
00:25:42,420 --> 00:25:45,780
to meet a lady as lovely
as yourself.
607
00:25:46,260 --> 00:25:49,140
You are too nice.
608
00:25:49,140 --> 00:25:50,580
I'm Maxine.
609
00:25:50,580 --> 00:25:51,700
What's your name?
610
00:25:51,700 --> 00:25:53,220
I'm Joe.
611
00:25:53,220 --> 00:25:55,700
And I'm from Hyde Park,
originally.
612
00:25:55,700 --> 00:25:58,180
Oh, that's nice.
613
00:25:58,180 --> 00:26:00,780
My cousin Myrna
lives in Rogers Park.
614
00:26:00,780 --> 00:26:01,980
Really?
615
00:26:02,220 --> 00:26:03,740
It's very nice.
616
00:26:06,140 --> 00:26:08,060
You know...
617
00:26:08,540 --> 00:26:11,340
you are very
nice-looking.
618
00:26:11,820 --> 00:26:13,140
Thank you.
619
00:26:15,380 --> 00:26:16,820
I'm Maxine.
620
00:26:16,940 --> 00:26:19,500
What's your name?
621
00:26:20,020 --> 00:26:20,980
I told you.
622
00:26:20,980 --> 00:26:22,220
It's Joe.
623
00:26:22,220 --> 00:26:24,500
Where are you from, Joe?
624
00:26:24,900 --> 00:26:25,940
Hyde Park.
625
00:26:26,340 --> 00:26:27,620
Oh, that's nice.
626
00:26:27,620 --> 00:26:30,300
My cousin Myrna
lives in Rogers Park.
627
00:26:38,820 --> 00:26:40,220
Good morning, ma'am.
628
00:27:14,980 --> 00:27:16,900
I'm sorry, dear.
629
00:27:16,900 --> 00:27:18,380
I just can't
do it.
630
00:27:18,780 --> 00:27:22,420
I'm... I'm just too old.
631
00:27:22,420 --> 00:27:27,100
I know I promised you,
and I'm sorry.
632
00:27:27,100 --> 00:27:28,540
I'm so sorry.
633
00:27:29,220 --> 00:27:30,340
Grandpa?
634
00:27:30,900 --> 00:27:32,620
Grandpa?
635
00:27:32,820 --> 00:27:34,740
Hey.
636
00:27:34,740 --> 00:27:37,620
This is my home, you can't
just break in here, David.
637
00:27:37,620 --> 00:27:39,060
Actually, I own the place,
638
00:27:39,060 --> 00:27:41,140
so, technically,
it's my home.
639
00:27:41,140 --> 00:27:42,580
And what did
you expect me to do
640
00:27:42,580 --> 00:27:46,660
when you leave a message on
my machine saying good-bye?
641
00:27:46,660 --> 00:27:48,580
I can't do it, David.
642
00:27:48,580 --> 00:27:50,100
I can't take it
anymore.
643
00:27:50,100 --> 00:27:51,140
I'm done.
644
00:27:51,620 --> 00:27:53,980
You're not done, okay?
645
00:27:53,980 --> 00:27:55,740
You're just afraid of
getting hurt.
646
00:27:55,740 --> 00:27:58,180
You're damn right
I'm afraid of getting hurt.
647
00:27:58,180 --> 00:28:00,580
Getting hurt hurts.
648
00:28:00,580 --> 00:28:03,460
I'd rather feel lonely
than to feel this way.
649
00:28:03,460 --> 00:28:04,580
It's just not worth it.
650
00:28:04,580 --> 00:28:05,940
No, it is worth it.
651
00:28:05,940 --> 00:28:07,580
No, it's not,
not for me.
652
00:28:08,140 --> 00:28:10,540
You just need to get more
in your element, okay?
653
00:28:10,540 --> 00:28:12,940
Ditch that old brown suit
654
00:28:12,940 --> 00:28:14,860
that I know
you're wearing,
655
00:28:14,860 --> 00:28:16,780
go and shop for some
new clothes.
656
00:28:16,780 --> 00:28:18,700
You know, get
a little more casual.
657
00:28:18,700 --> 00:28:21,700
And then, find the right place
to look for the ladies.
658
00:28:25,620 --> 00:28:27,900
Will you help me then,
David?
659
00:28:27,900 --> 00:28:29,500
Please?
660
00:28:36,100 --> 00:28:37,460
Look at you.
661
00:28:37,460 --> 00:28:39,380
Grandpa, you the man.
662
00:28:39,380 --> 00:28:40,340
You a player now.
663
00:28:40,820 --> 00:28:43,220
You lookin' sick,
you lookin' dope.
664
00:28:43,220 --> 00:28:46,340
Why the hell would you
dress me like a dope?
665
00:28:46,340 --> 00:28:50,660
All right, so you see
anybody interesting?
666
00:28:53,700 --> 00:28:55,380
What about her?
667
00:28:56,580 --> 00:28:59,700
Isn't she a bit...
large for you?
668
00:29:00,180 --> 00:29:02,860
Not the brunette,
the blond.
669
00:29:04,300 --> 00:29:05,700
Oh, uh, I think
the blond might be
670
00:29:05,700 --> 00:29:08,100
a little advanced
for you, Hef.
671
00:29:08,100 --> 00:29:09,060
Why don't we try
and find someone
672
00:29:09,540 --> 00:29:11,460
a bit more your
own age?
673
00:29:13,740 --> 00:29:14,980
How about her?
674
00:29:25,260 --> 00:29:27,180
Uh...
675
00:29:27,180 --> 00:29:30,060
Another rose for Rose.
676
00:29:31,980 --> 00:29:33,900
Hey!
677
00:29:33,900 --> 00:29:35,820
You stole that rose.
678
00:29:35,820 --> 00:29:37,740
You could go to
jail for that.
679
00:29:37,740 --> 00:29:41,100
Well, that's a risk
I'm willing to take.
680
00:29:41,100 --> 00:29:42,540
That mean you won't
accept it?
681
00:29:42,540 --> 00:29:44,460
Well, I just worry about
what will happen to us
682
00:29:44,940 --> 00:29:46,860
when the police come.
683
00:29:46,860 --> 00:29:48,780
Well, we'll
fight 'em off
684
00:29:48,780 --> 00:29:50,700
like Bonnie and Clyde.
685
00:29:53,100 --> 00:29:55,500
Bonnie and Clyde?
686
00:29:55,500 --> 00:29:56,940
That's a deal.
687
00:29:58,860 --> 00:30:01,260
Oh, listen, I never got your
name when we first met.
688
00:30:01,260 --> 00:30:03,180
It's Joe,
689
00:30:03,660 --> 00:30:06,540
and I'm delighted to
meet you again.
690
00:30:06,540 --> 00:30:09,420
Nice to meet you, too.
691
00:30:09,420 --> 00:30:11,340
Well...
692
00:30:11,820 --> 00:30:13,260
Please excuse me.
693
00:30:13,740 --> 00:30:15,660
Have a beautiful day.
694
00:30:20,180 --> 00:30:21,620
She's got a boyfriend.
695
00:30:22,100 --> 00:30:23,100
I noticed.
696
00:30:23,100 --> 00:30:24,420
Thought I was gonna have to
step in and break up
697
00:30:24,420 --> 00:30:25,660
a fight for
a second there.
698
00:30:25,660 --> 00:30:27,020
Whew!
699
00:30:27,020 --> 00:30:29,500
All right, come on,
shake it off.
700
00:30:29,980 --> 00:30:31,420
How about her?
701
00:30:31,420 --> 00:30:33,220
Down and up.
702
00:30:33,420 --> 00:30:34,780
And up.
703
00:30:34,780 --> 00:30:36,300
Good, good, good.
704
00:30:36,300 --> 00:30:38,220
Okay, um...
705
00:30:38,220 --> 00:30:39,500
All right, listen.
706
00:30:39,500 --> 00:30:40,780
The delt machine's
next on her circuit,
707
00:30:41,020 --> 00:30:42,660
so get over there and do
just like we planned.
708
00:30:42,660 --> 00:30:44,940
The wh... wh...
what machine?
709
00:30:44,940 --> 00:30:46,500
Next to the rhomboid
machine.
710
00:30:46,500 --> 00:30:47,300
What?
711
00:30:47,300 --> 00:30:49,740
Just go, go over there.
712
00:30:59,620 --> 00:31:01,060
All right, Edna,
that was awesome.
713
00:31:01,060 --> 00:31:02,980
Oh, thanks.
You rock.
714
00:31:02,980 --> 00:31:04,060
There's somebody
on the delt machine,
715
00:31:04,060 --> 00:31:05,020
so I'm just gonna
grab another cup
716
00:31:05,500 --> 00:31:07,860
and I'll meet you
at the bike, okay?
717
00:31:13,580 --> 00:31:15,420
- Hey!
- So sorry.
718
00:31:18,180 --> 00:31:19,740
I'm so sorry.
719
00:31:19,740 --> 00:31:21,260
You're...
720
00:31:21,740 --> 00:31:24,620
It's all right, I'll live.
721
00:31:24,620 --> 00:31:26,820
I'm Joe.
722
00:31:26,820 --> 00:31:28,500
Hey, Joe, I'm Edna.
723
00:31:32,900 --> 00:31:34,140
How late?
724
00:31:34,140 --> 00:31:37,020
Really late.
725
00:31:37,020 --> 00:31:39,420
All right, what night
does she go?
726
00:31:39,420 --> 00:31:40,860
Don't know.
727
00:31:40,860 --> 00:31:44,220
Depends on when she runs
out of clothes, I suppose.
728
00:32:03,620 --> 00:32:06,020
Very dirty clothes.
729
00:32:06,500 --> 00:32:07,940
Bloodstains.
730
00:32:12,380 --> 00:32:13,340
Call me.
731
00:32:13,340 --> 00:32:14,660
Ugh.
732
00:32:20,260 --> 00:32:21,620
You're embarrassing me,
David.
733
00:32:22,180 --> 00:32:23,140
What the...
734
00:32:23,140 --> 00:32:25,540
I want you to get out there
and sell me some cars.
735
00:32:28,900 --> 00:32:30,100
Hey there.
736
00:32:34,020 --> 00:32:35,460
What's this?
737
00:32:35,460 --> 00:32:37,860
Uh, our laundry.
738
00:32:37,860 --> 00:32:39,300
Carrie figured you might
as well be productive
739
00:32:39,300 --> 00:32:41,700
while you're stalking
your woman at the Laundromat.
740
00:32:41,700 --> 00:32:44,100
Oh, and, uh, make sure you
wash Carrie's stuff
741
00:32:44,100 --> 00:32:45,980
on the delicate cycle.
742
00:33:00,180 --> 00:33:01,980
Excuse me?
743
00:33:02,580 --> 00:33:04,020
Excuse me?
744
00:33:05,940 --> 00:33:07,180
Uh, hi there.
745
00:33:07,180 --> 00:33:09,180
Um, I think your
wash is done.
746
00:33:12,020 --> 00:33:13,340
Thanks, Julie.
747
00:33:32,060 --> 00:33:33,940
Nice bra.
748
00:33:33,940 --> 00:33:34,900
Excuse me?
749
00:33:34,900 --> 00:33:36,420
Your bra, I like it.
750
00:33:36,420 --> 00:33:37,340
It's very sexy.
751
00:33:37,340 --> 00:33:39,340
Oh, no, no,
this... I... I...
752
00:33:39,340 --> 00:33:40,940
There's no explanation
necessary.
753
00:33:40,940 --> 00:33:43,940
I'll just let my
imagination run wild.
754
00:33:43,940 --> 00:33:45,820
It's my girlfriend's.
755
00:33:46,300 --> 00:33:47,820
I'm sure it is.
756
00:33:51,580 --> 00:33:53,980
I was beginning to think I was
the only late-night washer.
757
00:33:54,460 --> 00:33:55,500
No.
758
00:33:55,500 --> 00:33:57,420
You know,
there's fewer people.
759
00:33:57,420 --> 00:33:58,820
No waiting for machines.
760
00:33:58,820 --> 00:34:00,260
No one finds out you're
a cross-dresser.
761
00:34:00,740 --> 00:34:02,060
That too.
762
00:34:04,340 --> 00:34:06,060
I'm David.
763
00:34:06,060 --> 00:34:07,020
Hi, David.
764
00:34:07,020 --> 00:34:09,300
It's nice to meet you.
765
00:34:13,060 --> 00:34:15,940
Uh, custom dictates this is
where you jump in
766
00:34:15,940 --> 00:34:18,220
and you tell me your name.
767
00:34:18,220 --> 00:34:21,060
But somehow you
already know my name.
768
00:34:21,540 --> 00:34:24,300
When I woke you up, you said,
"Thanks, Julie".
769
00:34:24,300 --> 00:34:25,740
Julie.
770
00:34:25,740 --> 00:34:27,180
Yeah, of course.
771
00:34:27,180 --> 00:34:29,580
No, I... yeah,
when I, um...
772
00:34:29,580 --> 00:34:32,620
Yeah, no, actually now,
we have met before.
773
00:34:33,180 --> 00:34:34,140
Really?
774
00:34:34,140 --> 00:34:35,740
Where?
775
00:34:35,740 --> 00:34:38,860
I'm a little hurt
you don't remember.
776
00:34:38,860 --> 00:34:40,300
That's right.
777
00:34:40,300 --> 00:34:41,740
Oh, my God, silly.
778
00:34:41,740 --> 00:34:44,140
We met at Victoria's Secret
when you were buying
779
00:34:44,140 --> 00:34:45,540
that beautiful bra.
780
00:34:45,540 --> 00:34:47,540
Actually I buy
my lingerie mail-order.
781
00:34:47,540 --> 00:34:48,780
It's more discreet
that way.
782
00:34:48,780 --> 00:34:51,260
Smart.
783
00:34:51,260 --> 00:34:55,220
So... where have we met?
784
00:34:55,220 --> 00:34:58,180
Football
a couple weeks ago?
785
00:34:58,180 --> 00:34:59,620
That's right.
786
00:34:59,620 --> 00:35:04,420
You were Mr. Trivial Pursuit,
trying to stump me.
787
00:35:04,420 --> 00:35:07,980
Well, um, it's nice
to meet you, David.
788
00:35:07,980 --> 00:35:09,900
Nice to meet you,
Julie.
789
00:35:13,660 --> 00:35:15,100
Boxers or briefs?
790
00:35:15,100 --> 00:35:16,060
Um...
791
00:35:16,060 --> 00:35:17,020
Oh, I forgot.
792
00:35:17,020 --> 00:35:18,460
It's panties.
793
00:35:20,380 --> 00:35:21,700
Boxer-briefs.
794
00:35:21,700 --> 00:35:22,500
You?
795
00:35:22,500 --> 00:35:24,660
Actually, um, right now,
I'm commando.
796
00:35:24,660 --> 00:35:27,020
Wow, impressive.
797
00:35:27,020 --> 00:35:28,420
I know.
798
00:35:28,420 --> 00:35:30,940
All right, um,
Ernie or Bert?
799
00:35:30,940 --> 00:35:32,460
Ernie.
800
00:35:32,460 --> 00:35:35,420
I never really had a thing
for long, yellow, oval heads.
801
00:35:35,420 --> 00:35:37,420
I see, you're partial
to the squashed,
802
00:35:37,420 --> 00:35:38,860
orange flat heads.
803
00:35:39,420 --> 00:35:40,380
Uh-huh, yeah.
804
00:35:40,380 --> 00:35:41,820
Oh, me too.
805
00:35:41,820 --> 00:35:42,780
Snickers or Milky way?
806
00:35:43,260 --> 00:35:45,180
Oh, neither.
807
00:35:45,180 --> 00:35:47,140
The Curly Wurly.
808
00:35:47,620 --> 00:35:49,060
It's the most
amazing candy.
809
00:35:49,060 --> 00:35:50,500
I have to
import it from...
810
00:35:50,500 --> 00:35:52,540
- England.
- England.
811
00:35:57,180 --> 00:35:59,020
Wow.
812
00:35:59,020 --> 00:36:01,500
What are the chances?
813
00:36:01,500 --> 00:36:03,420
Interesting.
814
00:36:05,260 --> 00:36:06,740
Okay.
815
00:36:06,740 --> 00:36:08,660
Guess it's time to
bring out the big guns.
816
00:36:08,660 --> 00:36:10,580
Shoot.
817
00:36:10,580 --> 00:36:11,540
Top or bottom?
818
00:36:11,540 --> 00:36:13,940
Well, you weren't
kidding.
819
00:36:13,940 --> 00:36:16,340
Um, top.
820
00:36:16,340 --> 00:36:17,780
You?
821
00:36:17,780 --> 00:36:18,940
Bottom.
822
00:36:18,940 --> 00:36:21,060
Hmm...
823
00:36:21,060 --> 00:36:22,500
Yeah, I always,
always start
824
00:36:22,500 --> 00:36:25,420
brushing
my teeth on the bottom.
825
00:36:25,420 --> 00:36:26,860
Your teeth?
826
00:36:26,860 --> 00:36:28,660
What did you think
I was talking about?
827
00:36:28,660 --> 00:36:31,620
Oh, my gosh,
that is terrible.
828
00:36:31,620 --> 00:36:33,060
What kind of girl do
you think I am?
829
00:36:33,060 --> 00:36:35,460
Oh, come on,
that's not fair.
830
00:36:35,460 --> 00:36:37,740
Who said anything about
playing fair?
831
00:36:37,740 --> 00:36:39,580
I'm gonna
go to the bathroom.
832
00:36:39,580 --> 00:36:41,020
Touche.
833
00:37:11,420 --> 00:37:12,860
Aah!
834
00:37:36,740 --> 00:37:39,140
Oh, good,
the dryers are done.
835
00:37:39,140 --> 00:37:40,980
Oh, perfect.
836
00:37:44,900 --> 00:37:45,860
That's weird.
837
00:37:45,860 --> 00:37:47,300
My clothes are still wet.
838
00:37:47,780 --> 00:37:49,700
Weird, mine, too.
839
00:37:49,700 --> 00:37:53,060
Ah, I hate these machines.
840
00:37:53,540 --> 00:37:55,940
I guess we'll
have to run 'em again.
841
00:37:56,420 --> 00:37:57,860
Oh, well.
842
00:38:01,100 --> 00:38:02,620
I think being
a graphic designer
843
00:38:02,620 --> 00:38:04,540
helps me to be
more creative.
844
00:38:04,540 --> 00:38:06,460
It sounds like a really
cool, rewarding job.
845
00:38:06,940 --> 00:38:07,900
I'm jealous.
846
00:38:08,380 --> 00:38:10,780
Well, I'm sure being a car
salesman's pretty rewarding.
847
00:38:10,780 --> 00:38:11,740
I mean, I'm sure you've
helped a lot of people
848
00:38:12,220 --> 00:38:13,660
buy their first car
849
00:38:13,660 --> 00:38:15,580
and given them a huge
sense of independence.
850
00:38:15,580 --> 00:38:16,900
Oh, it's not like that.
851
00:38:17,100 --> 00:38:18,620
Why not?
852
00:38:18,620 --> 00:38:20,060
It's a big game.
853
00:38:20,540 --> 00:38:21,980
I read people's
insecurities,
854
00:38:21,980 --> 00:38:23,420
I make them think
they're getting something
855
00:38:23,420 --> 00:38:24,380
they don't deserve,
856
00:38:24,860 --> 00:38:27,540
and then I convince them to
spend more than they should.
857
00:38:27,540 --> 00:38:30,420
Can't you just sell them
a car they can afford?
858
00:38:30,420 --> 00:38:31,860
I could, and then my dad
would fire me.
859
00:38:31,860 --> 00:38:33,460
Ahh.
860
00:38:33,460 --> 00:38:35,140
Yeah.
861
00:38:35,140 --> 00:38:38,380
Well, isn't there any other
job you'd find rewarding?
862
00:38:38,380 --> 00:38:39,820
Probably.
863
00:38:39,820 --> 00:38:41,740
I was actually
studying to get my masters
864
00:38:41,740 --> 00:38:43,660
in health-care administration,
865
00:38:43,660 --> 00:38:44,620
and then right before
I finished,
866
00:38:44,620 --> 00:38:46,060
my grandmother died,
867
00:38:46,060 --> 00:38:47,980
and my grandpa
sort of fell apart,
868
00:38:47,980 --> 00:38:50,780
so I had to buy him a condo
in a retirement community.
869
00:38:50,780 --> 00:38:52,220
Oh, yeah,
I know how that is.
870
00:38:52,700 --> 00:38:54,140
We had to put my grandma in
a retirement community
871
00:38:54,140 --> 00:38:56,060
for the same reason.
872
00:38:56,060 --> 00:38:57,940
She just couldn't
take the isolation.
873
00:38:57,940 --> 00:38:59,380
Yeah.
874
00:38:59,380 --> 00:39:00,340
Anyway, to afford
the mortgage,
875
00:39:00,340 --> 00:39:02,100
I had to go back to
selling cars with my dad.
876
00:39:02,660 --> 00:39:05,540
Well, why didn't your dad
just pay for it?
877
00:39:05,540 --> 00:39:08,420
Well, my dad left my mom
and me when I was eight,
878
00:39:08,420 --> 00:39:09,380
right before she died,
879
00:39:09,380 --> 00:39:12,260
so my grandpa and him don't
get along all that well.
880
00:39:12,260 --> 00:39:14,180
Or at all.
881
00:39:14,180 --> 00:39:15,620
But when I needed the money,
882
00:39:15,620 --> 00:39:17,540
my dad really came through
for me with the job.
883
00:39:18,100 --> 00:39:19,540
How'd your grandfather
like that?
884
00:39:20,020 --> 00:39:21,460
Well, he got all upset
because he thinks my dad's
885
00:39:21,460 --> 00:39:22,900
a bad influence on me.
886
00:39:22,900 --> 00:39:24,340
He's probably right.
887
00:39:24,820 --> 00:39:28,180
And we stopped
talking for a while.
888
00:39:28,180 --> 00:39:32,500
I have been looking
for these for weeks.
889
00:39:32,980 --> 00:39:34,420
They're, uh, gift certificates
890
00:39:34,420 --> 00:39:37,020
to my girlfriend's
favorite restaurant.
891
00:39:37,020 --> 00:39:39,500
Unbelievable.
892
00:39:39,980 --> 00:39:41,420
They expire on Sunday
893
00:39:41,420 --> 00:39:42,860
and she's out of town
until Monday.
894
00:39:42,860 --> 00:39:45,980
That sucks.
895
00:39:45,980 --> 00:39:48,900
Hey, you know what?
896
00:39:48,900 --> 00:39:50,340
She's not gonna
use them.
897
00:39:50,340 --> 00:39:52,740
There's no use
letting them go to waste.
898
00:39:52,740 --> 00:39:55,660
Would you like to go?
899
00:39:55,660 --> 00:39:58,300
That's so nice of you
to offer.
900
00:39:58,300 --> 00:39:59,740
Just make sure
you take somebody
901
00:39:59,740 --> 00:40:01,660
who really appreciates
good food.
902
00:40:05,540 --> 00:40:08,420
You know...
903
00:40:08,420 --> 00:40:11,300
Thanks, David.
904
00:40:11,300 --> 00:40:14,020
It's really
nice of you.
905
00:40:14,020 --> 00:40:16,420
Well, that's it for me.
906
00:40:29,460 --> 00:40:32,820
Well, David,
it was nice to meet you.
907
00:40:32,820 --> 00:40:34,420
Again.
908
00:40:34,420 --> 00:40:36,300
It was nice to meet you.
909
00:40:40,620 --> 00:40:42,100
Hey, uh, Julie.
910
00:40:48,340 --> 00:40:50,180
Yeah?
911
00:40:52,180 --> 00:40:54,660
Have a good night.
912
00:40:54,660 --> 00:40:56,100
Good night.
913
00:41:05,340 --> 00:41:08,660
So did you come up with
a reason to see her again?
914
00:41:08,660 --> 00:41:12,500
I found out her favorite
movie star is Rita Hayworth.
915
00:41:12,500 --> 00:41:14,900
I already talked to the girl
that plans movie night.
916
00:41:14,900 --> 00:41:16,820
You're a genius.
917
00:41:16,820 --> 00:41:19,500
As soon as the movie arrives,
I'm gonna call Edna...
918
00:41:19,580 --> 00:41:20,260
No!
919
00:41:20,260 --> 00:41:21,780
No, Grandpa.
920
00:41:22,060 --> 00:41:25,140
You have to wait
until she calls you.
921
00:41:25,140 --> 00:41:26,540
Take it from the genius.
922
00:41:26,540 --> 00:41:27,980
Well, it sounds
like the genius
923
00:41:27,980 --> 00:41:30,860
just stuck his big, fat
head up his ass.
924
00:41:30,860 --> 00:41:33,260
In my day,
no respectable woman
925
00:41:33,260 --> 00:41:35,220
would ever call
a man, ever.
926
00:41:35,300 --> 00:41:37,700
Well, it isn't
your day anymore.
927
00:41:37,700 --> 00:41:40,580
The rules of the game
have changed.
928
00:41:40,580 --> 00:41:42,020
Oh, applesauce.
929
00:41:42,020 --> 00:41:42,980
You're all wet.
930
00:41:42,980 --> 00:41:44,900
Trust me, Grandpa,
931
00:41:44,900 --> 00:41:46,340
I know
what I'm doing.
932
00:41:46,340 --> 00:41:49,740
I finally met that girl
that I've been after.
933
00:41:49,740 --> 00:41:51,660
Did you find out her
favorite movie star?
934
00:41:51,660 --> 00:41:54,100
That one works
like a charm.
935
00:41:54,100 --> 00:41:56,980
No, I stole her panties.
936
00:41:59,860 --> 00:42:01,780
You what?
937
00:42:01,780 --> 00:42:04,180
What kind of
sicko move is that?
938
00:42:04,180 --> 00:42:06,100
Is that how I raised you?
939
00:42:06,100 --> 00:42:08,500
It was a fair trade.
940
00:42:08,500 --> 00:42:11,860
I planted a pair of jeans
in her laundry.
941
00:42:11,860 --> 00:42:13,780
Oh...
942
00:42:14,260 --> 00:42:16,660
so now you're
wearing the panties
943
00:42:16,660 --> 00:42:19,540
and she's wearing
the pants.
944
00:42:19,540 --> 00:42:21,460
Oh, great.
945
00:42:32,940 --> 00:42:34,860
Stupid, dumb,
idiot plan.
946
00:42:42,620 --> 00:42:44,540
- How were your steaks?
- Oh, delicious, thanks.
947
00:42:44,540 --> 00:42:45,500
Could we pay
with these?
948
00:42:45,500 --> 00:42:47,460
Of course.
949
00:43:14,060 --> 00:43:15,500
Enough already.
950
00:43:15,500 --> 00:43:18,380
I haven't left my damn room
in three days.
951
00:43:28,940 --> 00:43:29,900
Hello.
952
00:43:30,380 --> 00:43:32,260
Uh, hi, Edna.
953
00:43:32,260 --> 00:43:33,220
It's Joe.
954
00:43:33,220 --> 00:43:34,180
Hello, Joe.
955
00:43:34,180 --> 00:43:35,620
I'm glad you caught me.
956
00:43:35,620 --> 00:43:38,020
Um, I was just
running out the door
957
00:43:38,020 --> 00:43:40,020
to the store for
some milk.
958
00:43:40,020 --> 00:43:41,460
Well, uh...
959
00:43:41,460 --> 00:43:43,860
I... I... I see that...
that "Gilda"
960
00:43:44,340 --> 00:43:46,020
is playing on Monday,
961
00:43:46,020 --> 00:43:48,180
and I know that Rita Hayworth
is your favorite,
962
00:43:48,660 --> 00:43:49,940
and I wondered if, uh,
963
00:43:49,940 --> 00:43:52,900
well, it might
be good
964
00:43:52,900 --> 00:43:55,300
if, uh, if you
wanted to, to see...
965
00:43:55,300 --> 00:43:58,180
see that talkie with me,
if you wanted to.
966
00:43:58,180 --> 00:44:00,940
It's at 2:00 on Monday.
967
00:44:00,940 --> 00:44:03,420
Well, let me
check my calendar.
968
00:44:15,940 --> 00:44:18,500
Well, Joe, um...
969
00:44:18,500 --> 00:44:20,980
I think I'm free.
970
00:44:20,980 --> 00:44:23,380
Oh!
971
00:44:23,380 --> 00:44:24,820
I'll see you then.
972
00:44:24,820 --> 00:44:26,260
Okey-dokey.
973
00:44:48,820 --> 00:44:50,740
Your package is here.
974
00:44:58,980 --> 00:45:00,500
Well, hello, Mr. Trivia.
975
00:45:01,060 --> 00:45:04,700
I have something that
I think belongs to you.
976
00:45:04,700 --> 00:45:06,140
Wow.
977
00:45:06,140 --> 00:45:07,100
You cross-dressing men
978
00:45:07,100 --> 00:45:08,820
just can't help yourselves,
can you?
979
00:45:08,820 --> 00:45:10,820
Yeah, they were cute,
but they didn't fit.
980
00:45:10,820 --> 00:45:13,700
So... hey, did you find
981
00:45:13,700 --> 00:45:17,140
a pair of my girlfriend's
jeans in your laundry?
982
00:45:17,620 --> 00:45:19,060
Mm-mm, no.
983
00:45:21,300 --> 00:45:22,740
- You didn't?
- Mm-mm.
984
00:45:23,220 --> 00:45:24,460
Are you sure?
985
00:45:24,460 --> 00:45:26,580
They were, uh, blue
with red flowers on them?
986
00:45:27,060 --> 00:45:28,500
No, but if they turn up,
I'll let you know.
987
00:45:28,500 --> 00:45:30,140
Sorry, I just got a call.
988
00:45:30,140 --> 00:45:32,140
I've got to go into work
today, Dollface.
989
00:45:32,140 --> 00:45:33,300
I'm off like
a bride's nightie.
990
00:45:33,300 --> 00:45:34,820
Oh.
991
00:45:34,820 --> 00:45:37,140
David, this is my
boyfriend, Paul.
992
00:45:37,140 --> 00:45:37,940
Paul, this is David.
993
00:45:37,940 --> 00:45:39,460
David is the only other
person in the city
994
00:45:39,460 --> 00:45:41,380
who does his
laundry at night.
995
00:45:41,380 --> 00:45:43,300
Oh, David!
996
00:45:43,620 --> 00:45:46,500
Yes, it's an absolute pleasure
to make your acquaintance.
997
00:45:46,500 --> 00:45:48,500
Oh, and thanks dearly
998
00:45:48,500 --> 00:45:51,020
for the lovely prezzies
of gift certificates.
999
00:45:51,580 --> 00:45:52,940
Charlie Trotter's
1000
00:45:52,940 --> 00:45:56,500
has an absolutely scrummy
fish and chips indeed.
1001
00:45:56,500 --> 00:45:58,540
Glad you enjoyed them.
1002
00:45:58,540 --> 00:46:00,980
Well, I've got to run,
you little minx.
1003
00:46:00,980 --> 00:46:02,060
I'll see you later tonight
1004
00:46:02,060 --> 00:46:04,540
for a little more
crazy Muskrat love?
1005
00:46:04,540 --> 00:46:06,300
Okay, yeah.
1006
00:46:06,300 --> 00:46:07,860
Mmm!
1007
00:46:11,300 --> 00:46:12,820
Uh, well,
I guess that means
1008
00:46:13,300 --> 00:46:15,220
you'll have to entertain
me today.
1009
00:46:15,220 --> 00:46:16,500
Are you free?
1010
00:46:16,500 --> 00:46:18,900
Um, yeah.
1011
00:46:18,900 --> 00:46:19,860
All right, cool.
1012
00:46:19,860 --> 00:46:21,780
I'm... I'm just gonna change,
and I'll be right out.
1013
00:46:22,260 --> 00:46:24,180
Okay.
1014
00:46:35,060 --> 00:46:38,420
Thank you for inviting me
to the movie, Joe.
1015
00:46:38,420 --> 00:46:40,820
I had a lovely time.
1016
00:46:40,820 --> 00:46:43,700
It's my pleasure.
1017
00:46:43,700 --> 00:46:45,620
I love a good
talkie.
1018
00:46:45,620 --> 00:46:46,580
Oh, me too.
1019
00:46:47,060 --> 00:46:48,500
Rita Hayworth was
wonderful in this.
1020
00:46:48,980 --> 00:46:49,940
Yes.
1021
00:46:49,940 --> 00:46:51,380
Yes, she was.
1022
00:46:55,700 --> 00:46:58,100
You know...
1023
00:46:58,100 --> 00:47:01,940
uh, Edna... I, uh...
1024
00:47:02,420 --> 00:47:05,300
I... I... I like...
1025
00:47:05,300 --> 00:47:06,740
spending time with you.
1026
00:47:10,100 --> 00:47:12,980
I mean, I like...
1027
00:47:12,980 --> 00:47:16,820
well... you.
1028
00:47:16,820 --> 00:47:19,220
Oh, Joe,
1029
00:47:19,220 --> 00:47:22,100
I like you too,
very much.
1030
00:47:22,100 --> 00:47:24,020
- Oh.
- Uh-huh.
1031
00:47:44,660 --> 00:47:45,820
No, wait a minute,
wait a minute,
1032
00:47:46,300 --> 00:47:47,260
there's more, there's more.
1033
00:47:47,260 --> 00:47:49,180
Not... not only does
she have a boyfriend,
1034
00:47:49,180 --> 00:47:51,100
but he's, like, 50 years old,
1035
00:47:51,580 --> 00:47:53,980
with gray hair,
lousy teeth,
1036
00:47:53,980 --> 00:47:55,900
nasty BO, and a bald spot.
1037
00:47:55,900 --> 00:47:57,340
- Are you serious?
- I'm serious.
1038
00:47:57,340 --> 00:47:59,180
Ha-ha-ha-ha,
very funny.
1039
00:47:59,180 --> 00:48:00,620
All right, enough.
1040
00:48:02,060 --> 00:48:02,940
So what's my strategy?
1041
00:48:03,500 --> 00:48:04,940
Ah, buddy-buddy
all the way.
1042
00:48:04,940 --> 00:48:05,740
Yeah.
1043
00:48:06,300 --> 00:48:08,420
What the hell is
buddy-buddy?
1044
00:48:08,420 --> 00:48:10,820
If Julie knows
that David wants her,
1045
00:48:10,820 --> 00:48:13,220
she's gonna avoid him because
she doesn't wanna feel like
1046
00:48:13,220 --> 00:48:14,180
she's cheating
on her boyfriend.
1047
00:48:14,180 --> 00:48:16,460
But as her buddy,
I'm not a threat,
1048
00:48:16,500 --> 00:48:17,980
so we get to spend
quality time together.
1049
00:48:18,020 --> 00:48:20,140
Before she knows it, she's
more attracted to me
1050
00:48:20,660 --> 00:48:21,580
than her boyfriend.
1051
00:48:21,620 --> 00:48:24,940
And that is
the end of the story.
1052
00:48:24,980 --> 00:48:26,060
Uhh!
1053
00:48:26,060 --> 00:48:27,780
No, it's not!
1054
00:48:31,260 --> 00:48:32,980
David, you need to grow up.
1055
00:48:33,460 --> 00:48:36,460
Don't you realize that girls
know when you're playing them?
1056
00:48:36,460 --> 00:48:38,020
Don't ask me how,
but they do.
1057
00:48:38,500 --> 00:48:39,460
They know.
1058
00:48:39,460 --> 00:48:41,740
And you!
1059
00:48:41,740 --> 00:48:44,100
I am so fed up
with your crap.
1060
00:48:44,100 --> 00:48:45,180
You're gonna have to decide
1061
00:48:45,220 --> 00:48:47,660
if you wanna be a divorced
bachelor with him
1062
00:48:47,700 --> 00:48:49,580
or a husband to me.
1063
00:48:49,620 --> 00:48:51,180
All right?
1064
00:48:54,540 --> 00:48:56,940
What about making that
Wednesday night laundry gig
1065
00:48:56,940 --> 00:48:58,380
a regular thing?
1066
00:48:58,380 --> 00:49:00,300
What, so after a big
Tuesday night
1067
00:49:00,300 --> 00:49:02,220
of wild muskrat love
1068
00:49:02,220 --> 00:49:03,660
with her antique
British boyfriend,
1069
00:49:03,660 --> 00:49:06,540
I can help wash the evidence
out of the sheets?
1070
00:49:06,540 --> 00:49:08,460
No, thank you.
1071
00:49:20,020 --> 00:49:21,340
- Hemorrhoids.
- Ahh.
1072
00:49:21,380 --> 00:49:22,860
Preventing hemorrhoids.
1073
00:49:22,900 --> 00:49:26,220
It lowers the "G" forces
on your tushie.
1074
00:49:26,740 --> 00:49:28,380
Joe taught me that.
1075
00:49:28,380 --> 00:49:32,540
So, um, what home
do you guys live in?
1076
00:49:32,540 --> 00:49:35,260
Oh, we're in the Lakewood
Retirement Community.
1077
00:49:35,300 --> 00:49:36,780
Are you serious?
1078
00:49:36,820 --> 00:49:38,220
My grandma lives there.
1079
00:49:38,260 --> 00:49:39,180
Oh.
1080
00:49:39,220 --> 00:49:41,100
Yeah, I'm... I'm always
going to visit her.
1081
00:49:41,140 --> 00:49:42,060
Really?
1082
00:49:42,260 --> 00:49:43,140
I didn't know that.
1083
00:49:43,340 --> 00:49:45,980
Yeah, her name's Rose.
1084
00:49:46,020 --> 00:49:47,900
I know her.
1085
00:49:47,940 --> 00:49:50,300
Now I see where you get
your good looks.
1086
00:49:50,340 --> 00:49:52,380
We'll all have to
get together some time.
1087
00:49:52,380 --> 00:49:54,780
That would be wonderful.
1088
00:49:54,820 --> 00:49:58,620
Um, David,
did you know
1089
00:49:58,660 --> 00:50:01,020
that Joe is a wonderful
kisser?
1090
00:50:04,220 --> 00:50:06,140
Um, no, Edna.
1091
00:50:06,620 --> 00:50:07,580
I did not know that.
1092
00:50:07,580 --> 00:50:09,500
Oh, yes.
1093
00:50:09,780 --> 00:50:11,740
Your grandmother
taught him well.
1094
00:50:12,260 --> 00:50:15,020
I can't wait to find out
what else she taught him.
1095
00:50:19,460 --> 00:50:21,340
So...
1096
00:50:21,380 --> 00:50:22,940
how long have
you two been dating?
1097
00:50:25,860 --> 00:50:27,260
Oh, no,
we're not dating.
1098
00:50:27,300 --> 00:50:28,700
No.
1099
00:50:28,740 --> 00:50:31,580
David, he's... he's like
a brother to me.
1100
00:50:36,580 --> 00:50:38,540
A brother?
1101
00:50:38,580 --> 00:50:40,460
You mean, like a brother
from Kentucky, right?
1102
00:50:40,980 --> 00:50:42,380
That way, you guys
could fool around, right?
1103
00:50:42,420 --> 00:50:44,300
Ahh!
1104
00:50:44,340 --> 00:50:45,740
Why are you getting yourself
all worked up
1105
00:50:45,780 --> 00:50:47,180
- over this one girl?
- Why?
1106
00:50:47,700 --> 00:50:48,620
I don't know,
I don't know.
1107
00:50:49,140 --> 00:50:52,460
Because she's...
she's cute and...
1108
00:50:52,500 --> 00:50:55,820
and I kind of like her,
and I'm blowing it!
1109
00:50:55,860 --> 00:50:58,220
Would you just please
tell her how you feel?
1110
00:50:58,260 --> 00:51:00,620
- Trust me on this one.
- No!
1111
00:51:00,660 --> 00:51:04,460
No, what I gotta do is
turn things up a notch.
1112
00:51:04,980 --> 00:51:07,340
Rob, are you interested in
1113
00:51:07,380 --> 00:51:10,140
playing a little
poker tonight?
1114
00:51:10,180 --> 00:51:11,100
No.
1115
00:51:11,140 --> 00:51:13,020
No, I can't.
1116
00:51:13,060 --> 00:51:14,940
Carrie and I
are spending some
1117
00:51:14,980 --> 00:51:17,820
husband-and-wife time
together.
1118
00:51:17,820 --> 00:51:20,220
Playing Scrabble.
1119
00:51:20,700 --> 00:51:22,540
Please tell me "Scrabble"
is code for having sex.
1120
00:51:25,340 --> 00:51:27,260
Actually,
it's just Scrabble.
1121
00:51:29,580 --> 00:51:31,100
I got the girl to
show another
1122
00:51:31,100 --> 00:51:32,540
Rita Hayworth
talkie tonight.
1123
00:51:32,540 --> 00:51:33,980
You interested?
1124
00:51:34,020 --> 00:51:35,420
Oh, let's just have
dinner instead, Joe.
1125
00:51:35,940 --> 00:51:37,820
Is that okay?
1126
00:51:37,860 --> 00:51:38,780
Joe?
1127
00:51:38,820 --> 00:51:40,220
Rose.
1128
00:51:40,260 --> 00:51:42,300
Joe... Joe!
1129
00:51:42,300 --> 00:51:44,300
So nice to
see you again.
1130
00:51:44,300 --> 00:51:46,220
Well, hello again.
1131
00:51:46,700 --> 00:51:48,620
I met your
granddaughter the other day.
1132
00:51:48,620 --> 00:51:51,020
She and my grandson
are close friends.
1133
00:51:51,020 --> 00:51:53,420
Like brother and sister,
she said.
1134
00:51:53,420 --> 00:51:54,940
Well, if they're
brother and sister,
1135
00:51:54,940 --> 00:51:57,900
then that should make us
their grandparents.
1136
00:51:57,900 --> 00:52:00,300
I suppose it would!
1137
00:52:00,300 --> 00:52:03,260
Imagine, all this time we've
had the same grandkids,
1138
00:52:03,260 --> 00:52:04,700
and we didn't
know about it.
1139
00:52:04,700 --> 00:52:06,140
Imagine that.
1140
00:52:06,140 --> 00:52:07,660
Joe, we're going to
be late.
1141
00:52:07,660 --> 00:52:08,620
Yes, we're late, too,
Rose.
1142
00:52:09,100 --> 00:52:11,020
- Late for what?
- Late for what?
1143
00:52:12,940 --> 00:52:15,820
I... I... I'll see you
at the family reunion.
1144
00:52:15,820 --> 00:52:17,260
I'll bring
the potato salad.
1145
00:52:17,260 --> 00:52:18,940
Okay.
1146
00:52:18,940 --> 00:52:20,940
You've been dating
three weeks?
1147
00:52:20,940 --> 00:52:22,380
How come you
never told me?
1148
00:52:22,380 --> 00:52:24,300
Ah, we just started
getting serious
1149
00:52:24,300 --> 00:52:26,220
and I'm really into her.
1150
00:52:26,220 --> 00:52:28,140
Well, I'm sure
she's into you, too.
1151
00:52:28,140 --> 00:52:29,100
I don't know.
1152
00:52:29,580 --> 00:52:31,020
You know, it's tough
to tell.
1153
00:52:31,020 --> 00:52:32,940
Wait, you've never
talked about it?
1154
00:52:34,860 --> 00:52:37,260
Oh.
1155
00:52:37,260 --> 00:52:38,700
Hey!
1156
00:52:38,700 --> 00:52:40,140
Amanda, come here.
1157
00:52:40,140 --> 00:52:41,580
David, she's beautiful,
she could be a model.
1158
00:52:42,060 --> 00:52:43,020
I know, she is a model.
1159
00:52:43,020 --> 00:52:45,420
- Hey.
- Hi.
1160
00:52:45,900 --> 00:52:48,780
Amanda, this is,
uh, Julie.
1161
00:52:48,780 --> 00:52:50,220
Oh.
1162
00:52:52,140 --> 00:52:53,100
It's so nice
to meet you, Julie.
1163
00:52:53,100 --> 00:52:55,980
I've heard such nice things
about you.
1164
00:52:56,460 --> 00:52:57,420
How are you?
1165
00:52:57,420 --> 00:52:59,020
- Hmm, good, I'm good.
- Good.
1166
00:53:00,540 --> 00:53:02,860
I hope you're hungry.
1167
00:53:02,860 --> 00:53:05,740
Edna's tired of
kissing me.
1168
00:53:05,740 --> 00:53:08,620
Aw, I'm sorry, Grandpa.
1169
00:53:08,620 --> 00:53:10,060
I told you you
shouldn't have laid it all
1170
00:53:10,060 --> 00:53:11,580
on the table like that.
1171
00:53:11,580 --> 00:53:15,020
You can't let them know
your true feelings so soon.
1172
00:53:15,020 --> 00:53:17,420
Why does she say she doesn't
wanna see you anymore?
1173
00:53:17,420 --> 00:53:20,220
She wants to
see more of me.
1174
00:53:20,620 --> 00:53:21,340
Oh.
1175
00:53:21,340 --> 00:53:22,700
Well, what's
the problem then?
1176
00:53:23,020 --> 00:53:25,980
She wants to
see all of me!
1177
00:53:25,980 --> 00:53:29,900
She wants me to perform
with her.
1178
00:53:29,900 --> 00:53:32,060
On stage, I hope.
1179
00:53:32,620 --> 00:53:33,820
In bed.
1180
00:53:33,820 --> 00:53:35,820
Well, does she
know that
1181
00:53:35,820 --> 00:53:37,260
you can't... you know?
1182
00:53:37,260 --> 00:53:37,980
Are you kidding?
1183
00:53:38,540 --> 00:53:39,980
No way.
1184
00:53:39,980 --> 00:53:44,060
She assumes
I'm a virile young man.
1185
00:53:44,060 --> 00:53:46,460
Are you sure
she assumes that?
1186
00:53:46,460 --> 00:53:47,900
If she finds out the truth,
1187
00:53:47,900 --> 00:53:49,900
it'll get around
the home in hours.
1188
00:53:49,900 --> 00:53:53,260
I'll be the laughingstock
and I'll never find anybody.
1189
00:53:53,260 --> 00:53:56,620
I just wanted some
companionship.
1190
00:53:56,620 --> 00:53:59,020
I can't believe
this is happening.
1191
00:54:01,420 --> 00:54:02,380
I can't believe
my grandpa's
1192
00:54:02,860 --> 00:54:04,300
getting more
action than I am.
1193
00:54:08,380 --> 00:54:09,820
Mmm!
1194
00:54:09,820 --> 00:54:12,140
I broke up with Paul.
1195
00:54:12,620 --> 00:54:14,060
Oh, Jul,
I'm so sorry.
1196
00:54:14,060 --> 00:54:15,500
How are you doing?
1197
00:54:15,500 --> 00:54:16,860
What happened?
1198
00:54:16,860 --> 00:54:19,260
Seeing you with Amanda
really affected me.
1199
00:54:19,260 --> 00:54:20,700
It did?
1200
00:54:20,700 --> 00:54:23,100
Yeah, I just... you guys
seemed so happy together
1201
00:54:23,100 --> 00:54:25,020
and there was so much
passion.
1202
00:54:25,500 --> 00:54:26,940
I got a little jealous.
1203
00:54:26,940 --> 00:54:27,900
You did?
1204
00:54:28,380 --> 00:54:31,260
I realized there's no passion
with me and Paul,
1205
00:54:31,260 --> 00:54:32,460
and I realized why.
1206
00:54:33,020 --> 00:54:35,020
Because he's 60?
1207
00:54:35,020 --> 00:54:37,020
No.
1208
00:54:37,020 --> 00:54:41,020
Because I think I'm interested
in someone else.
1209
00:54:41,020 --> 00:54:41,980
Really?
1210
00:54:41,980 --> 00:54:43,420
Yeah.
1211
00:54:43,420 --> 00:54:46,540
He's funny
and smart and cute.
1212
00:54:47,100 --> 00:54:48,540
But he just started seeing
someone else,
1213
00:54:48,540 --> 00:54:51,820
so I don't
know what to do.
1214
00:54:51,820 --> 00:54:53,980
Just tell him.
1215
00:54:54,460 --> 00:54:56,380
Really?
1216
00:54:56,380 --> 00:54:57,820
I don't know,
it's complicated.
1217
00:54:58,300 --> 00:55:00,220
- There's...
- What are you afraid of?
1218
00:55:00,700 --> 00:55:03,100
Just be honest
with your feelings.
1219
00:55:03,100 --> 00:55:04,940
I'm sure he likes you.
1220
00:55:08,300 --> 00:55:11,180
David... you are the most
1221
00:55:11,660 --> 00:55:15,180
amazing friend
a woman could ever ask for.
1222
00:55:15,180 --> 00:55:17,500
Yeah.
1223
00:55:17,500 --> 00:55:18,940
You're so right.
1224
00:55:18,940 --> 00:55:21,820
I'm gonna tell him.
1225
00:55:21,820 --> 00:55:23,980
As soon as I walk
into work tomorrow,
1226
00:55:23,980 --> 00:55:25,740
- I'm just gonna tell him.
- Whoa, work?
1227
00:55:26,220 --> 00:55:29,100
Yeah, he works in
the media department.
1228
00:55:29,100 --> 00:55:30,060
Wait, wait, wait, wait.
1229
00:55:30,060 --> 00:55:33,260
So... oh, so he
works with you?
1230
00:55:33,260 --> 00:55:34,780
Well, I told you it
was complicated.
1231
00:55:34,780 --> 00:55:36,380
Do you think
I shouldn't do it?
1232
00:55:36,860 --> 00:55:37,820
I don't know.
1233
00:55:37,820 --> 00:55:39,580
- Why are you asking me?
- Why?
1234
00:55:39,580 --> 00:55:41,420
I saw you at the bar
with Amanda
1235
00:55:41,420 --> 00:55:44,300
and those other women,
you ladies' man, you.
1236
00:55:44,300 --> 00:55:47,100
Those girls said you
were quite the player.
1237
00:55:47,100 --> 00:55:48,780
I'm a player?
1238
00:55:48,780 --> 00:55:51,020
No, I don't mean it
in a bad way.
1239
00:55:51,020 --> 00:55:53,420
That's why it's
perfect we're friends.
1240
00:55:53,420 --> 00:55:54,940
'Cause now you can help me
with this stuff.
1241
00:55:55,500 --> 00:55:56,940
Yeah.
1242
00:56:00,700 --> 00:56:02,140
She called me a player.
1243
00:56:02,140 --> 00:56:03,580
Ooh, some nerve.
1244
00:56:03,580 --> 00:56:05,020
I actually thought
she was gonna break up
1245
00:56:05,020 --> 00:56:06,460
with that old fart
to go out with me.
1246
00:56:06,460 --> 00:56:07,420
She's got issues, man.
1247
00:56:07,420 --> 00:56:08,860
This calls for action.
1248
00:56:08,860 --> 00:56:09,900
About time.
1249
00:56:09,900 --> 00:56:11,340
If she wants a player,
she's gonna get one.
1250
00:56:11,820 --> 00:56:13,180
I'm gonna play her
like a two-bit fiddle.
1251
00:56:13,180 --> 00:56:14,700
A what?
1252
00:56:14,700 --> 00:56:16,140
By next week,
she'll be mine.
1253
00:56:16,140 --> 00:56:17,020
She won't even know
what hit her.
1254
00:56:17,580 --> 00:56:19,260
Spoken like
a true player.
1255
00:56:24,100 --> 00:56:24,780
A player.
1256
00:56:24,780 --> 00:56:26,300
Ha!
1257
00:56:26,300 --> 00:56:27,660
I'll show her a player.
1258
00:56:35,740 --> 00:56:38,620
Oh, Joe, you came!
1259
00:56:39,100 --> 00:56:40,540
Oh!
1260
00:56:40,540 --> 00:56:42,460
For a beautiful lady.
1261
00:56:44,860 --> 00:56:46,780
Oh, thank you.
1262
00:56:46,780 --> 00:56:48,700
Aww.
1263
00:56:48,700 --> 00:56:50,140
Just wonderful.
1264
00:56:52,700 --> 00:56:54,100
Who knew that there
was a winery
1265
00:56:54,620 --> 00:56:55,980
an hour outside of the city?
1266
00:56:56,460 --> 00:56:57,900
I thought you had to go
to Napa to get good wine.
1267
00:56:58,380 --> 00:57:00,780
You do, but if you want
extraordinarily average wine,
1268
00:57:00,780 --> 00:57:02,020
you come here.
1269
00:57:11,180 --> 00:57:12,580
Thanks for inviting me.
1270
00:57:12,620 --> 00:57:14,500
I'm sorry Amanda
couldn't come.
1271
00:57:14,540 --> 00:57:15,940
I certainly brought back
1272
00:57:15,980 --> 00:57:17,380
enough wine for her,
didn't I?
1273
00:57:17,420 --> 00:57:18,340
Oh, and don't think
I didn't see all those
1274
00:57:18,380 --> 00:57:19,780
candles in the trunk.
1275
00:57:20,300 --> 00:57:22,660
Planning a big night,
are we?
1276
00:57:22,700 --> 00:57:23,620
Actually,
we're having some issues.
1277
00:57:28,460 --> 00:57:29,380
What's wrong?
1278
00:57:29,420 --> 00:57:31,300
Oh, damn it!
1279
00:57:31,340 --> 00:57:32,980
- What?
- We're out of gas.
1280
00:57:33,580 --> 00:57:34,980
Oh, no.
1281
00:57:35,020 --> 00:57:38,260
And... that's that.
1282
00:57:38,300 --> 00:57:40,100
Oh, God, now what
are we gonna do?
1283
00:57:42,060 --> 00:57:44,900
Um, Edna?
1284
00:57:45,420 --> 00:57:48,260
I have something
I have to tell you.
1285
00:57:48,300 --> 00:57:50,180
Let me freshen
your glass first.
1286
00:57:52,620 --> 00:57:55,060
Edna, I don't know
how to say this,
1287
00:57:55,100 --> 00:57:57,540
but...
1288
00:57:57,580 --> 00:58:00,780
I'm not as young
as I used to be.
1289
00:58:00,780 --> 00:58:02,220
Really, Joe?
1290
00:58:02,220 --> 00:58:04,860
You look pretty
spry to me.
1291
00:58:04,860 --> 00:58:07,660
No... no.
1292
00:58:08,140 --> 00:58:11,180
I mean,
I'm an older man now
1293
00:58:11,180 --> 00:58:12,620
than I used to be,
1294
00:58:12,620 --> 00:58:15,500
and sometimes
things don't work
1295
00:58:15,500 --> 00:58:17,420
like they used to.
1296
00:58:17,820 --> 00:58:19,500
Well, Joe, I don't...
1297
00:58:19,500 --> 00:58:21,420
I don't understand
what you're trying to say.
1298
00:58:21,900 --> 00:58:25,460
Edna, I have to
know something.
1299
00:58:25,500 --> 00:58:28,340
Are you trying to
seduce me?
1300
00:58:28,380 --> 00:58:31,700
Why, yes, Joe.
1301
00:58:31,740 --> 00:58:33,140
I am.
1302
00:58:34,620 --> 00:58:36,500
Well, that's just grand.
1303
00:58:36,540 --> 00:58:38,900
But I have to
tell you,
1304
00:58:38,940 --> 00:58:41,780
it might be hard
for me to satisfy you
1305
00:58:41,820 --> 00:58:45,140
if you've raised your
expectations.
1306
00:58:45,180 --> 00:58:47,540
Well, Joe...
1307
00:58:47,580 --> 00:58:49,460
why don't you let me
worry about
1308
00:58:49,500 --> 00:58:51,380
what's going to be hard
1309
00:58:51,420 --> 00:58:53,780
and what's going to be
raised, hmm?
1310
00:59:03,900 --> 00:59:05,660
I guess if we're gonna get
stranded for three hours
1311
00:59:05,660 --> 00:59:07,980
waiting for
roadside assistance,
1312
00:59:07,980 --> 00:59:09,580
this is the place to do it.
1313
00:59:18,220 --> 00:59:19,620
Thank you.
1314
00:59:20,140 --> 00:59:22,020
One down, four to go.
1315
00:59:48,380 --> 00:59:49,780
Whoops... ahh!
1316
00:59:49,820 --> 00:59:51,700
I'm sorry.
1317
00:59:51,740 --> 00:59:53,300
Are you okay?
1318
00:59:53,500 --> 00:59:55,460
Are you okay?
1319
00:59:55,500 --> 00:59:57,740
I'll be out in just
a moment, Joe.
1320
01:00:00,860 --> 01:00:02,420
Oh, Joe?
1321
01:00:11,940 --> 01:00:13,580
What do you think?
1322
01:00:14,060 --> 01:00:15,340
Wow.
1323
01:00:15,820 --> 01:00:17,140
How do you feel?
1324
01:00:17,700 --> 01:00:19,140
Me?
1325
01:00:19,140 --> 01:00:21,060
Oh, I feel fine.
1326
01:00:21,060 --> 01:00:23,660
I admit, I'm a little
nervous, but I...
1327
01:00:23,660 --> 01:00:25,460
Um, Joe?
1328
01:00:25,460 --> 01:00:28,220
Yeah?
1329
01:00:28,220 --> 01:00:29,660
Did I drop something?
1330
01:00:39,220 --> 01:00:40,660
It's alive!
1331
01:00:41,140 --> 01:00:42,980
It's alive!
1332
01:00:42,980 --> 01:00:44,300
Oh, it's a miracle!
1333
01:00:44,300 --> 01:00:45,340
Hallelujah!
1334
01:00:45,340 --> 01:00:47,740
Praise the Lord!
1335
01:00:47,740 --> 01:00:49,660
Quick.
1336
01:00:49,660 --> 01:00:50,620
Quick, before it's gone!
1337
01:00:51,940 --> 01:00:53,380
How's your toe?
1338
01:00:53,380 --> 01:00:55,300
Oh, I think I'll live.
1339
01:00:55,300 --> 01:00:57,700
This frigid temperature is
keeping the swelling down.
1340
01:00:57,700 --> 01:00:59,140
Hey, maybe if the dashboard
catches on fire,
1341
01:00:59,140 --> 01:01:00,580
it'll heat
things up in here.
1342
01:01:01,060 --> 01:01:02,020
Are you cold?
1343
01:01:02,020 --> 01:01:03,460
I can barely
feel my fingers.
1344
01:01:03,460 --> 01:01:04,900
Come here.
1345
01:01:06,340 --> 01:01:07,780
Ooh, that feels good.
1346
01:01:29,180 --> 01:01:30,580
You call for a jump?
1347
01:01:31,100 --> 01:01:33,020
Oh, sorry, bro.
1348
01:01:33,020 --> 01:01:35,420
It looks like somebody
already got jumped,huh?
1349
01:01:35,420 --> 01:01:38,780
Yeah, uh... no.
1350
01:01:38,780 --> 01:01:41,660
We... we ran
out of gas.
1351
01:01:41,660 --> 01:01:42,580
Are you sure?
1352
01:01:43,060 --> 01:01:44,980
It says right here
that you need a jump.
1353
01:01:46,900 --> 01:01:48,820
Nope, gas.
1354
01:01:48,820 --> 01:01:51,620
I didn't bring my gas can,
so I'll have to tow you.
1355
01:01:51,620 --> 01:01:53,540
Gonna take about a second
to hook you up, all right?
1356
01:02:00,260 --> 01:02:01,220
What?
1357
01:02:10,740 --> 01:02:12,180
Oh, my.
1358
01:02:12,660 --> 01:02:14,580
I don't have
any protection.
1359
01:02:14,580 --> 01:02:16,020
Protection?
1360
01:02:16,500 --> 01:02:17,940
Protection from what?
1361
01:02:17,940 --> 01:02:19,860
You know, birth control.
1362
01:02:21,780 --> 01:02:23,700
I don't think
that'll be an issue.
1363
01:02:24,180 --> 01:02:26,100
Oh, you're on
the pill?
1364
01:02:26,100 --> 01:02:27,420
Good thinking.
1365
01:02:47,140 --> 01:02:49,540
It's like that little battery
bunny, it's still going.
1366
01:02:53,300 --> 01:02:54,740
Oh, David, stop!
1367
01:02:55,220 --> 01:02:56,900
That tickles.
1368
01:02:58,420 --> 01:02:59,860
Stop, that tickles.
1369
01:03:01,780 --> 01:03:03,220
Oh, oh, oh.
1370
01:03:03,220 --> 01:03:07,060
Ooh, oh, oh,
ooh, ooh.
1371
01:03:07,060 --> 01:03:09,460
Edna, Edna, where...
1372
01:03:09,460 --> 01:03:10,900
where... where...
1373
01:03:10,900 --> 01:03:12,820
Edna, where are you...
1374
01:03:13,300 --> 01:03:14,260
Where...
1375
01:03:14,260 --> 01:03:15,700
Edna, look out,
look out.
1376
01:03:16,180 --> 01:03:18,540
You're getting close!
1377
01:03:18,540 --> 01:03:20,420
Oh, God.
1378
01:03:22,220 --> 01:03:24,100
Oh, God.
1379
01:03:26,500 --> 01:03:28,900
Oh, God!
1380
01:03:29,060 --> 01:03:30,420
Oh, God!
1381
01:03:30,580 --> 01:03:32,340
- Oh, God!
- Oh, God!
1382
01:03:32,500 --> 01:03:34,420
- Oh, God!
- Oh, God!
1383
01:03:41,620 --> 01:03:42,580
Wow.
1384
01:03:55,100 --> 01:03:57,580
Bring her right this way,
hold the elevator.
1385
01:03:57,580 --> 01:03:59,020
Oh, Edna, I'm sorry.
1386
01:03:59,500 --> 01:04:00,460
So sorry.
1387
01:04:00,460 --> 01:04:01,900
I'm an awful man.
1388
01:04:01,900 --> 01:04:04,300
Oh, no,
you're a wonderful man.
1389
01:04:04,300 --> 01:04:07,180
Otherwise, I wouldn't be
lying here like this.
1390
01:04:07,180 --> 01:04:09,100
Joe, what happened
to Edna?
1391
01:04:10,540 --> 01:04:11,580
Uh...
1392
01:05:10,460 --> 01:05:11,900
Grandpa, I got your message,
are you all right?
1393
01:05:11,900 --> 01:05:13,340
What's going on?
1394
01:05:13,340 --> 01:05:15,740
It's not me, it's Edna.
1395
01:05:15,740 --> 01:05:18,460
She's fine, just a little
shortness of breath.
1396
01:05:18,460 --> 01:05:20,620
Nothing serious.
1397
01:05:20,620 --> 01:05:22,300
What happened?
1398
01:05:22,780 --> 01:05:24,220
What happened?
1399
01:05:24,220 --> 01:05:26,620
I'll tell you
what happened.
1400
01:05:26,620 --> 01:05:29,980
That angel of a woman
slipped me a Mickey.
1401
01:05:30,460 --> 01:05:31,900
Have you ever heard
1402
01:05:31,900 --> 01:05:35,020
of a black-market drug
called Viagra?
1403
01:05:35,500 --> 01:05:36,460
Oh, please, tell me you...
1404
01:05:36,460 --> 01:05:38,380
- They're these magic pills,
see? - No, please, just stop.
1405
01:05:38,380 --> 01:05:40,380
I couldn't have
stopped if I tried.
1406
01:05:40,380 --> 01:05:42,300
I kept going
and going
1407
01:05:42,300 --> 01:05:44,700
and going and going.
1408
01:05:45,180 --> 01:05:48,220
Actually, I think
I might still be going.
1409
01:05:48,220 --> 01:05:51,100
Whoo-ee, those pills
are sick!
1410
01:05:51,580 --> 01:05:52,460
They're what?
1411
01:05:52,740 --> 01:05:54,180
David,
you may not know it,
1412
01:05:54,180 --> 01:05:57,540
but your grandfather
is a sex machine.
1413
01:05:57,540 --> 01:05:59,460
A real "chick maggot".
1414
01:05:59,460 --> 01:06:01,380
Mag... magnet.
1415
01:06:01,380 --> 01:06:03,940
Grandpa, chick magnet.
1416
01:06:04,420 --> 01:06:07,780
Oh, I guess that would make
more sense, wouldn't it?
1417
01:06:07,780 --> 01:06:10,660
David, have you ever heard
1418
01:06:10,660 --> 01:06:13,060
of a woman giving a man
something called a...
1419
01:06:15,980 --> 01:06:17,900
- She put her mouth on... - Oh,
yeah, no, no, I know what it is.
1420
01:06:17,900 --> 01:06:20,820
Your grandmother sure as hell
never did that to me.
1421
01:06:20,820 --> 01:06:23,700
My goodness, I felt
like a damn Popsicle.
1422
01:06:24,180 --> 01:06:27,060
She even took her
dentures out.
1423
01:06:27,060 --> 01:06:29,940
And after that,
we did the wild thing.
1424
01:06:29,940 --> 01:06:30,900
The what?
1425
01:06:30,900 --> 01:06:32,820
It was just like
riding a bike.
1426
01:06:32,820 --> 01:06:35,700
Well, not just
like riding a bike.
1427
01:06:37,140 --> 01:06:41,460
David, I don't know if
I ever told you this,
1428
01:06:41,460 --> 01:06:43,860
but your grandmother
is the only woman
1429
01:06:43,860 --> 01:06:46,740
I ever had
sexual relations with.
1430
01:06:46,740 --> 01:06:49,620
And after last night,
I realized,
1431
01:06:50,100 --> 01:06:52,020
bless her soul,
1432
01:06:52,020 --> 01:06:54,900
she didn't have
a clue in the bedroom.
1433
01:06:55,380 --> 01:06:57,780
But that Edna, she's a real
professional.
1434
01:06:57,780 --> 01:06:59,660
Whoo-ee!
1435
01:06:59,660 --> 01:07:01,180
All right, Grandpa,
enough, all right?
1436
01:07:01,180 --> 01:07:03,100
What's with Edna?
1437
01:07:03,100 --> 01:07:04,060
Oh, she's fine.
1438
01:07:04,540 --> 01:07:06,940
Her... her daughter's with
her in her room there,
1439
01:07:06,940 --> 01:07:10,340
talking with
the retirement-home director.
1440
01:07:14,340 --> 01:07:16,260
That's her daughter?
1441
01:07:16,740 --> 01:07:18,460
Is he gonna explain to her
what caused all this?
1442
01:07:19,020 --> 01:07:20,460
Oh, I don't
think he'd do that.
1443
01:07:20,460 --> 01:07:22,380
He what?!
1444
01:07:22,380 --> 01:07:25,260
What kind of dirty old men do
you let into that place?
1445
01:07:25,740 --> 01:07:27,180
Or maybe he would.
1446
01:07:27,180 --> 01:07:28,580
I assure you
that we only have
1447
01:07:28,580 --> 01:07:29,620
the highest of standards...
1448
01:07:29,620 --> 01:07:31,060
As soon as she's ready,
1449
01:07:31,060 --> 01:07:33,940
I want my mother out of that
brothel you're running
1450
01:07:34,420 --> 01:07:35,860
and on a plane to my home
1451
01:07:35,860 --> 01:07:37,300
where I can take care
of her myself.
1452
01:07:37,300 --> 01:07:38,740
- Sweetie...
- Do you understand?
1453
01:07:38,740 --> 01:07:40,180
Let's not overreact here.
1454
01:07:40,180 --> 01:07:42,580
Mother, enough!
Discussion over!
1455
01:07:43,060 --> 01:07:45,460
And in the meantime,
you make sure
1456
01:07:45,460 --> 01:07:47,660
that lecherous,
disgusting old man
1457
01:07:47,660 --> 01:07:49,580
stays the hell away
from my mother!
1458
01:07:50,060 --> 01:07:50,940
Just let me explain.
1459
01:07:51,420 --> 01:07:53,500
This kind of thing doesn't
happen at our facility.
1460
01:08:06,540 --> 01:08:08,940
Don't go, please.
1461
01:08:08,940 --> 01:08:09,940
I'm sorry, Joe.
1462
01:08:09,940 --> 01:08:10,900
She's my daughter.
1463
01:08:11,380 --> 01:08:13,620
If she wants me to move,
I have to go.
1464
01:08:14,100 --> 01:08:15,940
But I love you, Edna.
1465
01:08:15,940 --> 01:08:17,860
Whoa there, Joe.
1466
01:08:17,860 --> 01:08:19,660
Let's not move
too quickly here.
1467
01:08:19,660 --> 01:08:22,060
But last night...
1468
01:08:22,540 --> 01:08:24,980
I'll always, always
remember last night
1469
01:08:25,460 --> 01:08:27,860
and I will cherish it
forever.
1470
01:08:27,860 --> 01:08:29,780
But, y'know, people our age,
1471
01:08:29,780 --> 01:08:34,180
we... we have to live every
second to the fullest.
1472
01:08:34,180 --> 01:08:36,940
It doesn't make any
sense for either one of us
1473
01:08:36,940 --> 01:08:40,300
to be tied down to
just one person.
1474
01:08:40,300 --> 01:08:42,620
Trust me.
1475
01:08:42,620 --> 01:08:44,980
You don't know it yet,
1476
01:08:44,980 --> 01:08:49,300
but you're like
a wild stallion
1477
01:08:49,300 --> 01:08:51,700
and you must run free.
1478
01:08:56,460 --> 01:08:59,340
Oh, I'm so sorry,
Grandpa.
1479
01:08:59,340 --> 01:09:03,660
I feel like I just met her
and it's over already.
1480
01:09:03,660 --> 01:09:05,580
She was such
a sweet woman.
1481
01:09:05,580 --> 01:09:08,940
Just being with her,
I wasn't so lonely.
1482
01:09:08,940 --> 01:09:10,860
And even when
I wasn't with her,
1483
01:09:10,860 --> 01:09:13,260
knowing I was gonna see
her again soon,
1484
01:09:13,260 --> 01:09:15,180
knowing somebody
was thinking about me,
1485
01:09:15,180 --> 01:09:17,100
somebody cared for me,
1486
01:09:17,580 --> 01:09:19,500
made it easier
to get through the day.
1487
01:09:20,900 --> 01:09:23,300
I can't do this again,
David.
1488
01:09:23,300 --> 01:09:25,220
I can't take the pain.
1489
01:09:25,220 --> 01:09:27,860
It hurts too much, and it
doesn't get any easier.
1490
01:09:27,860 --> 01:09:29,620
I know it's hard
right now.
1491
01:09:29,620 --> 01:09:31,900
But don't worry, Grandpa.
1492
01:09:31,900 --> 01:09:33,820
There's another companion
out there for you.
1493
01:09:33,820 --> 01:09:35,940
No.
1494
01:09:35,940 --> 01:09:38,420
Your grandmother
was my first love,
1495
01:09:38,420 --> 01:09:42,260
Edna was my last.
1496
01:09:42,260 --> 01:09:45,620
Not a bad run
for 84 years.
1497
01:09:45,620 --> 01:09:48,500
But now...
I'm done with love.
1498
01:09:48,500 --> 01:09:50,900
I'm done, it's over,
I'm ending it.
1499
01:09:51,380 --> 01:09:52,820
All right, will you stop
talking like that?
1500
01:09:52,820 --> 01:09:54,260
I'm not gonna
let you kill yourself.
1501
01:09:54,260 --> 01:09:56,180
Who's killing themselves?
1502
01:09:56,180 --> 01:09:58,100
You think I wanna
spend my remaining days
1503
01:09:58,100 --> 01:09:59,540
sitting on some park bench,
1504
01:09:59,540 --> 01:10:01,940
talking about my arthritis
with some old biddy?
1505
01:10:02,420 --> 01:10:03,380
What do you mean?
1506
01:10:03,380 --> 01:10:04,820
What about looking for
companionship?
1507
01:10:04,820 --> 01:10:06,740
I just got
a new start on life
1508
01:10:06,740 --> 01:10:08,660
with those pills.
1509
01:10:08,660 --> 01:10:11,540
They're like
bottled erections.
1510
01:10:11,540 --> 01:10:13,460
Once this word gets
around the home,
1511
01:10:13,460 --> 01:10:16,340
the babes are
gonna be begging for me.
1512
01:10:16,340 --> 01:10:20,180
David...
I'm the man now.
1513
01:10:20,180 --> 01:10:22,100
I'm a player.
1514
01:10:22,100 --> 01:10:23,060
I'm dope!
1515
01:10:23,060 --> 01:10:25,940
No, you are a dope.
1516
01:10:25,940 --> 01:10:27,380
You're the one
who convinced me
1517
01:10:27,380 --> 01:10:28,820
that I was missing out
on something,
1518
01:10:28,820 --> 01:10:30,260
and now that
I finally find a girl
1519
01:10:30,260 --> 01:10:32,180
that I kind of really like,
1520
01:10:32,660 --> 01:10:34,580
and you flip over
to the other side?
1521
01:10:34,580 --> 01:10:36,500
Circle of life.
1522
01:10:36,500 --> 01:10:39,380
I started out as
a baby sucking on a breast,
1523
01:10:39,380 --> 01:10:42,260
and by golly, that's the way
I wanna end up.
1524
01:10:42,260 --> 01:10:43,100
I just don't understand.
1525
01:10:43,100 --> 01:10:44,620
David...
1526
01:10:44,620 --> 01:10:46,060
Grandpa's horny,
1527
01:10:46,540 --> 01:10:48,420
and he wants to have
some fun.
1528
01:10:48,420 --> 01:10:50,420
That's... that's...
1529
01:10:50,420 --> 01:10:51,460
that's horse feathers!
1530
01:10:51,460 --> 01:10:52,980
No, that's tight.
1531
01:10:52,980 --> 01:10:54,900
That's damn tight.
1532
01:10:56,260 --> 01:10:58,180
So tell me...
1533
01:10:58,180 --> 01:11:00,580
how did things
go with your young lady?
1534
01:11:03,460 --> 01:11:04,420
Perfect.
1535
01:11:04,420 --> 01:11:05,380
I hit on all sixes.
1536
01:11:05,380 --> 01:11:06,820
That's my boy.
1537
01:11:06,820 --> 01:11:09,220
Just like your grandfather.
1538
01:11:09,220 --> 01:11:12,180
And I know exactly how
we're gonna celebrate.
1539
01:11:13,660 --> 01:11:16,100
Barkeep, a barrel
of Viagra for me
1540
01:11:16,100 --> 01:11:18,500
and a case of condoms
for my friend here.
1541
01:11:27,420 --> 01:11:28,860
Hi.
1542
01:11:31,980 --> 01:11:33,900
Thanks.
1543
01:11:33,900 --> 01:11:34,860
Um, come on in.
1544
01:11:34,860 --> 01:11:36,660
I'm running late for work.
1545
01:11:38,820 --> 01:11:41,020
So I didn't get a chance
1546
01:11:41,020 --> 01:11:44,220
to say good-bye
to you the other night.
1547
01:11:44,220 --> 01:11:47,100
Yeah, I walked home.
1548
01:11:47,100 --> 01:11:48,660
I didn't think you'd be
offering me a ride.
1549
01:11:48,660 --> 01:11:50,140
What?
1550
01:11:50,140 --> 01:11:52,700
Of course I would have,
why would you say that?
1551
01:11:52,700 --> 01:11:56,100
Because your car
ran out of gas.
1552
01:11:56,540 --> 01:11:57,460
Yes, it did.
1553
01:11:57,460 --> 01:11:59,860
Good point.
1554
01:11:59,860 --> 01:12:02,940
I really enjoyed myself
the other night.
1555
01:12:05,420 --> 01:12:06,980
Yeah, me too.
1556
01:12:06,980 --> 01:12:09,860
You wanna do it
again sometime?
1557
01:12:09,860 --> 01:12:11,300
Sure.
1558
01:12:11,300 --> 01:12:14,340
What are you
doing tonight?
1559
01:12:14,340 --> 01:12:15,700
Oh, uh, David,
1560
01:12:16,180 --> 01:12:18,260
I didn't think that
you meant right away.
1561
01:12:18,260 --> 01:12:20,900
I just meant, you know,
someday.
1562
01:12:20,900 --> 01:12:22,260
I just don't think that
1563
01:12:22,260 --> 01:12:23,220
it would be good for
our friendship
1564
01:12:23,220 --> 01:12:25,740
if we made that
a regular thing.
1565
01:12:25,740 --> 01:12:27,620
Do you?
1566
01:12:27,620 --> 01:12:29,060
No, no, no,
no, of course.
1567
01:12:29,540 --> 01:12:30,980
No, I didn't wanna make
it a regular thing.
1568
01:12:30,980 --> 01:12:33,380
I just thought
you might wanna
1569
01:12:33,860 --> 01:12:36,220
go out to dinner tonight.
1570
01:12:36,220 --> 01:12:37,140
Really?
1571
01:12:37,140 --> 01:12:38,580
Yeah, no, of course, no.
1572
01:12:38,580 --> 01:12:40,100
The friendship
comes first.
1573
01:12:40,100 --> 01:12:43,540
Oh, I'm so glad
to hear you say that.
1574
01:12:44,020 --> 01:12:44,980
I would go out tonight,
1575
01:12:45,460 --> 01:12:48,380
but guess who
left me a message?
1576
01:12:48,380 --> 01:12:49,740
Who?
1577
01:12:49,740 --> 01:12:51,580
The sexy guy from work.
1578
01:12:51,580 --> 01:12:53,380
Yeah, he wants to
go out tonight.
1579
01:12:53,380 --> 01:12:55,380
But I should wait
to call him back, right?
1580
01:12:55,860 --> 01:12:57,900
Just play it cool?
1581
01:12:57,900 --> 01:12:59,820
Yeah, oh,
totally, yeah.
1582
01:12:59,820 --> 01:13:01,260
Yeah, of course.
1583
01:13:01,260 --> 01:13:04,860
Whoa, look at that,
I should go.
1584
01:13:04,860 --> 01:13:08,020
Well, do you wanna
have lunch instead?
1585
01:13:08,500 --> 01:13:09,940
Yeah, great.
1586
01:13:10,420 --> 01:13:12,140
I'll see you later.
1587
01:13:12,140 --> 01:13:13,660
So I'll just
come by your work?
1588
01:13:13,660 --> 01:13:15,300
Mm-hmm.
1589
01:13:26,620 --> 01:13:28,460
She's the one.
1590
01:13:30,500 --> 01:13:32,020
I'm sorry, David.
1591
01:13:32,020 --> 01:13:33,420
That sucks.
1592
01:13:33,980 --> 01:13:36,820
But like I said, you either
know when you meet her
1593
01:13:36,820 --> 01:13:38,740
or you know
when you lose her.
1594
01:13:44,020 --> 01:13:46,420
So, obviously word
of your prowess
1595
01:13:46,420 --> 01:13:47,860
is out on the street.
1596
01:13:47,860 --> 01:13:50,260
Oh, yeah, my phone
won't stop ringing.
1597
01:13:50,260 --> 01:13:52,540
I've met three chicks
already.
1598
01:13:52,540 --> 01:13:54,460
Well, Grandpa,
that's the bee's knees.
1599
01:13:54,460 --> 01:13:56,940
Yeah, but none of them really
lit my fire, you know?
1600
01:14:03,340 --> 01:14:06,300
Grandpa, you're
a retirement-home gigolo.
1601
01:14:06,780 --> 01:14:08,700
I'm no longer
a one-woman guy.
1602
01:14:09,180 --> 01:14:11,380
I'm a wild stallion,
and run free I must.
1603
01:14:11,380 --> 01:14:13,380
You said companionship
is the only thing that...
1604
01:14:13,740 --> 01:14:17,060
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
1605
01:14:17,060 --> 01:14:19,620
Well, so what are you gonna
do about your situation?
1606
01:14:23,420 --> 01:14:25,620
I have no idea.
1607
01:14:25,620 --> 01:14:26,580
No idea.
1608
01:14:26,580 --> 01:14:28,100
I'm lost.
1609
01:14:28,260 --> 01:14:31,700
David, maybe this isn't
the right girl for you.
1610
01:14:31,700 --> 01:14:32,660
I mean, maybe...
maybe she's not...
1611
01:14:32,660 --> 01:14:34,660
She is, Grandpa.
1612
01:14:34,660 --> 01:14:36,500
She is.
1613
01:14:36,500 --> 01:14:39,300
She's my companion.
1614
01:14:39,300 --> 01:14:41,260
She's special.
1615
01:14:41,260 --> 01:14:43,580
She's different.
1616
01:14:43,580 --> 01:14:45,500
Maybe that's the problem.
1617
01:14:45,500 --> 01:14:47,900
If she's so different,
maybe you should use
1618
01:14:47,900 --> 01:14:51,700
a different strategy
than you've used before.
1619
01:14:51,700 --> 01:14:55,620
David, if you wanna win
the game of love,
1620
01:14:56,100 --> 01:14:59,260
maybe you should stop
playing games with women.
1621
01:15:01,460 --> 01:15:02,700
Hmm.
1622
01:15:06,060 --> 01:15:07,100
I have to go to work.
1623
01:15:07,100 --> 01:15:08,620
Do you have to
leave already?
1624
01:15:08,620 --> 01:15:11,380
You... you never get to spend
time here anymore.
1625
01:15:11,380 --> 01:15:12,780
Stay, please.
1626
01:15:12,780 --> 01:15:15,180
I'm sorry, Grandpa,
I really can't.
1627
01:15:15,180 --> 01:15:16,220
Thanks.
1628
01:15:16,780 --> 01:15:18,220
I'll see you soon.
1629
01:15:25,660 --> 01:15:28,380
Is that a smoking jacket
you're wearing?
1630
01:15:28,940 --> 01:15:30,380
Oh, yes, indeedy.
1631
01:15:30,860 --> 01:15:32,780
A few of the girls pitched in
and bought it for me.
1632
01:15:33,260 --> 01:15:34,300
You like?
1633
01:15:54,660 --> 01:15:55,780
I don't know.
1634
01:15:56,260 --> 01:15:58,380
You know, as much
as I hate to admit it,
1635
01:15:58,380 --> 01:16:00,300
ever since Carrie...
1636
01:16:00,300 --> 01:16:02,580
how should
I put it?...
1637
01:16:02,580 --> 01:16:05,460
put my balls in a sling,
1638
01:16:05,460 --> 01:16:09,220
life has been nice,
you know?
1639
01:16:09,220 --> 01:16:10,180
I mean,
don't get me wrong.
1640
01:16:10,180 --> 01:16:11,620
I... I... of course,
I miss living
1641
01:16:11,620 --> 01:16:14,500
the wild bachelor life
vicariously through you,
1642
01:16:14,980 --> 01:16:17,380
but, uh... and of course,
you know, I miss...
1643
01:16:17,380 --> 01:16:19,700
I miss my balls, you know?
1644
01:16:19,700 --> 01:16:22,700
But it's been, you know,
it's been kind of fun.
1645
01:16:22,700 --> 01:16:24,140
In fact, you'll like this.
1646
01:16:24,140 --> 01:16:27,980
The other night, Carrie took
me out to the club dancing.
1647
01:16:27,980 --> 01:16:31,300
Um, after we played...
after we played Scrabble.
1648
01:16:31,300 --> 01:16:34,660
I'll take it, but without
the navigation system.
1649
01:16:38,660 --> 01:16:40,780
I said,
I'll buy the car.
1650
01:16:41,740 --> 01:16:43,180
Okay.
1651
01:16:43,180 --> 01:16:45,580
Just step into my office.
1652
01:16:45,580 --> 01:16:46,860
I'll be one...
1653
01:16:49,340 --> 01:16:50,300
Hey.
1654
01:16:50,300 --> 01:16:52,180
Hey, you ready for lunch?
1655
01:16:52,180 --> 01:16:54,660
Yeah, um, I just have
a customer in the office,
1656
01:16:54,660 --> 01:16:55,740
and then I'm all set.
1657
01:16:55,740 --> 01:16:56,780
All right, cool.
1658
01:16:57,260 --> 01:16:58,700
Well, I will just
browse around
1659
01:16:59,180 --> 01:17:00,620
and pretend like
I can actually afford
1660
01:17:00,620 --> 01:17:02,020
some of these cars.
1661
01:17:02,500 --> 01:17:03,740
All right, uh...
1662
01:17:03,740 --> 01:17:06,140
Um, you know what?
1663
01:17:06,140 --> 01:17:07,580
Before we go,
I... I need to...
1664
01:17:07,580 --> 01:17:09,500
I gotta talk to you.
1665
01:17:09,500 --> 01:17:11,020
If it's about
the other night...
1666
01:17:11,020 --> 01:17:13,500
No, no, no, no, no,
it's, um...
1667
01:17:13,500 --> 01:17:17,340
it's... it's
more than that.
1668
01:17:17,340 --> 01:17:20,100
I haven't been completely
1669
01:17:20,100 --> 01:17:24,140
honest with you
about my feelings.
1670
01:17:24,140 --> 01:17:26,260
David, excuse me.
Yeah.
1671
01:17:26,740 --> 01:17:29,620
There is a customer waiting
for you in your office.
1672
01:17:29,620 --> 01:17:31,060
I'll be there in a moment.
1673
01:17:31,060 --> 01:17:32,980
They are ready
to sign contracts.
1674
01:17:33,460 --> 01:17:35,860
I said, in a moment!
1675
01:17:35,860 --> 01:17:37,780
Just...
1676
01:17:41,620 --> 01:17:42,580
Sorry.
1677
01:17:42,580 --> 01:17:44,020
Um...
1678
01:17:47,860 --> 01:17:51,220
I'm interested
in you...
1679
01:17:51,220 --> 01:17:53,140
more than a friend.
1680
01:17:53,140 --> 01:17:55,340
Romantically.
1681
01:17:55,340 --> 01:17:57,020
I've been interested in you
since I met you
1682
01:17:57,020 --> 01:17:59,020
at the football game,
1683
01:17:59,020 --> 01:18:00,940
and since we've
become friends,
1684
01:18:00,940 --> 01:18:02,380
what I initially thought
was gonna be
1685
01:18:02,380 --> 01:18:05,180
a passing thing has
turned into much more,
1686
01:18:05,180 --> 01:18:08,860
and I wanna be with you.
1687
01:18:09,340 --> 01:18:12,220
Because...
1688
01:18:12,220 --> 01:18:14,500
I think I love you.
1689
01:18:17,660 --> 01:18:19,140
I love you, too.
1690
01:18:21,060 --> 01:18:22,860
But...
1691
01:18:25,780 --> 01:18:27,620
...not in the same way.
1692
01:18:31,980 --> 01:18:32,940
Why?
1693
01:18:32,940 --> 01:18:34,500
We're good together.
1694
01:18:35,060 --> 01:18:37,940
Look, I...
1695
01:18:37,940 --> 01:18:40,140
wouldn't be honest
if I said that I haven't
1696
01:18:40,140 --> 01:18:44,460
thought about you romantically,
because I have.
1697
01:18:44,940 --> 01:18:47,580
But I just don't
think it would work.
1698
01:18:47,580 --> 01:18:49,420
Why not?
1699
01:18:49,420 --> 01:18:50,860
David, I insist that you...
1700
01:18:50,860 --> 01:18:52,220
Let's talk outside.
1701
01:18:52,220 --> 01:18:53,500
Hey!
1702
01:18:53,500 --> 01:18:56,220
You leave that customer
waiting one more second,
1703
01:18:56,220 --> 01:18:58,140
you're through.
1704
01:18:58,140 --> 01:18:59,580
Get your hand off me!
1705
01:19:06,300 --> 01:19:08,620
Why won't it work out?
1706
01:19:08,620 --> 01:19:10,380
I just don't think
you're my type, David.
1707
01:19:10,380 --> 01:19:11,420
What?
1708
01:19:11,420 --> 01:19:12,380
Why not?
1709
01:19:12,860 --> 01:19:15,060
I'm looking for
someone who's sincere
1710
01:19:15,060 --> 01:19:16,500
and up-front
1711
01:19:16,500 --> 01:19:18,620
and open with their
feelings, and that's not you.
1712
01:19:18,620 --> 01:19:19,660
I'm being pretty damn
open with my feelings
1713
01:19:20,140 --> 01:19:21,660
right now, aren't I?
1714
01:19:22,140 --> 01:19:23,580
It's bigger than that.
1715
01:19:23,580 --> 01:19:25,500
I mean, how long
have you felt this way?
1716
01:19:25,500 --> 01:19:26,940
You've never even
said a word,
1717
01:19:26,940 --> 01:19:27,780
never even hinted at it.
1718
01:19:27,780 --> 01:19:29,700
For the first time
in my life,
1719
01:19:29,700 --> 01:19:32,100
I have spilled my guts out.
1720
01:19:32,100 --> 01:19:35,460
I have never
done that for anyone.
1721
01:19:35,460 --> 01:19:37,420
Doesn't that mean
anything to you?
1722
01:19:37,900 --> 01:19:41,260
Frankly, David,
what I think it means
1723
01:19:41,260 --> 01:19:44,140
is you've tried
everything.
1724
01:19:44,140 --> 01:19:45,580
Now you're desperate.
1725
01:19:48,420 --> 01:19:50,900
Look, can't we just
get past this?
1726
01:19:50,900 --> 01:19:51,940
Our friendship is...
1727
01:19:51,940 --> 01:19:54,940
I'm not interested
in a friendship!
1728
01:19:54,940 --> 01:19:56,500
Okay?
1729
01:19:56,500 --> 01:19:57,940
I never was!
1730
01:20:01,460 --> 01:20:04,340
That's good to know.
1731
01:20:04,820 --> 01:20:06,260
Nice.
1732
01:20:07,660 --> 01:20:08,820
So that's it, then?
1733
01:20:11,620 --> 01:20:13,620
Great.
1734
01:20:13,620 --> 01:20:15,540
That's just great.
1735
01:20:15,540 --> 01:20:17,460
It was nice
knowing you, David.
1736
01:20:23,540 --> 01:20:24,980
Ugh!
1737
01:20:29,540 --> 01:20:31,940
I want you to
gather your stuff
1738
01:20:31,940 --> 01:20:33,300
and get out
1739
01:20:33,300 --> 01:20:35,220
and not come back.
1740
01:20:38,580 --> 01:20:40,500
Keep it... Dad.
1741
01:20:43,020 --> 01:20:44,940
Checkmate.
1742
01:20:44,940 --> 01:20:46,420
Game over.
1743
01:20:48,220 --> 01:20:49,460
Can you stay
for dinner tonight?
1744
01:20:49,460 --> 01:20:52,260
They're serving
Chicken Kiev.
1745
01:20:52,260 --> 01:20:54,940
I don't know.
1746
01:20:54,940 --> 01:20:57,340
I got an erection
the other night.
1747
01:20:57,340 --> 01:21:01,020
All natural, no Viagra.
1748
01:21:01,020 --> 01:21:04,460
I keep seeing your friend's
grandmother everywhere.
1749
01:21:04,460 --> 01:21:06,860
That Rose is tight.
1750
01:21:07,340 --> 01:21:09,740
But she won't
pay any attention to me.
1751
01:21:09,740 --> 01:21:11,180
I'm seeing two other ladies,
1752
01:21:11,660 --> 01:21:15,500
but I can't seem to get
Rose out of my mind.
1753
01:21:15,500 --> 01:21:18,140
Any ideas, Casanova?
1754
01:21:18,140 --> 01:21:20,780
Did you try that buddy-buddy
thing I told you about?
1755
01:21:20,780 --> 01:21:23,180
Eh, like most
of your plans,
1756
01:21:23,180 --> 01:21:26,020
I figure it's
a piece of crap.
1757
01:21:26,020 --> 01:21:27,940
Well, try it.
1758
01:21:29,780 --> 01:21:32,180
Well, what's eating you,
David?
1759
01:21:32,180 --> 01:21:35,540
Is it your lady friend?
1760
01:21:35,540 --> 01:21:38,660
Are you doing
as well as I am?
1761
01:21:38,660 --> 01:21:40,940
No.
1762
01:21:40,940 --> 01:21:42,380
I'm doing worse.
1763
01:22:08,660 --> 01:22:09,620
Hello?
1764
01:22:09,620 --> 01:22:10,580
It's your dad.
1765
01:22:11,060 --> 01:22:12,020
You've missed three
damn weeks already,
1766
01:22:12,020 --> 01:22:13,460
and now you're late again.
1767
01:22:13,460 --> 01:22:14,900
What are you
talking about?
1768
01:22:15,380 --> 01:22:17,140
You're late for your job.
1769
01:22:17,140 --> 01:22:18,940
Are you coming in
today or not?
1770
01:22:18,940 --> 01:22:21,700
Because if you're not,
I'll fire you again.
1771
01:22:24,420 --> 01:22:26,340
Yeah, I'll be there
in an hour.
1772
01:22:26,340 --> 01:22:27,780
Make it 45 minutes!
1773
01:22:30,260 --> 01:22:34,580
I told you, as much
as I'd love to, I... I can't.
1774
01:22:34,580 --> 01:22:36,500
I'm already dating a man.
1775
01:22:36,500 --> 01:22:38,900
I'm dating around, too.
1776
01:22:38,900 --> 01:22:41,300
I just wanna
be friends.
1777
01:22:41,300 --> 01:22:44,540
Friends have dinner together,
too, don't they?
1778
01:22:44,540 --> 01:22:45,980
I suppose they do.
1779
01:22:45,980 --> 01:22:48,180
Maybe you already
have too many friends,
1780
01:22:48,180 --> 01:22:50,580
but even so, in a place
like this,
1781
01:22:50,580 --> 01:22:52,300
who knows who's
gonna croak next?
1782
01:22:54,140 --> 01:22:55,100
Bad run of luck,
1783
01:22:55,100 --> 01:22:56,500
and you could be
friendless is a week.
1784
01:22:59,100 --> 01:23:00,540
Joe.
1785
01:23:02,100 --> 01:23:04,980
Roadside assistance
is kind of expensive.
1786
01:23:04,980 --> 01:23:07,060
You... you think we
really need it?
1787
01:23:07,060 --> 01:23:08,500
Not at all.
1788
01:23:08,500 --> 01:23:10,140
I'll take it off.
1789
01:23:11,660 --> 01:23:14,060
Of course, that's always when
something happens, isn't it?
1790
01:23:14,540 --> 01:23:16,020
And probably when your
wife is driving.
1791
01:23:18,500 --> 01:23:19,940
Uh, keep it.
1792
01:23:19,940 --> 01:23:22,860
I guess
it's worth it.
1793
01:23:22,860 --> 01:23:24,300
Okay.
1794
01:23:24,300 --> 01:23:26,580
I'll just go
get this approved.
1795
01:23:33,460 --> 01:23:34,900
Still got it.
1796
01:24:02,260 --> 01:24:04,380
A good profit margin
on this one?
1797
01:24:04,380 --> 01:24:05,740
I'd say so.
1798
01:24:05,740 --> 01:24:07,500
Take note, Rob.
1799
01:24:07,500 --> 01:24:09,260
Two hours
back on the lot,
1800
01:24:09,740 --> 01:24:11,660
the man's already
sold a car.
1801
01:24:11,660 --> 01:24:12,620
I told you, David.
1802
01:24:12,620 --> 01:24:14,460
You were
born for this.
1803
01:24:14,460 --> 01:24:16,260
Couldn't agree
with you more, Dick.
1804
01:24:20,340 --> 01:24:21,780
Unfortunately, we had to
make a few changes
1805
01:24:21,780 --> 01:24:23,220
to get the contract approved,
1806
01:24:23,220 --> 01:24:25,140
but I got you a new one with
what I think you'll find
1807
01:24:25,140 --> 01:24:27,220
are much more
favorable terms.
1808
01:24:28,740 --> 01:24:29,860
But you can't do this.
1809
01:24:29,860 --> 01:24:30,900
It's already done.
1810
01:24:30,900 --> 01:24:31,860
Signed by the manager
right there.
1811
01:24:32,340 --> 01:24:34,260
Now when you sign it,
it becomes legally binding.
1812
01:24:34,740 --> 01:24:37,180
You can't back out and,
of course, neither can we.
1813
01:24:37,180 --> 01:24:39,060
But you're selling us
a car for a dollar?
1814
01:24:39,060 --> 01:24:40,100
Uh, that's true,
1815
01:24:40,580 --> 01:24:42,020
but I'm also throwing in
the roadside assistance
1816
01:24:42,020 --> 01:24:44,900
and the warranty
and the CD player.
1817
01:24:44,900 --> 01:24:47,300
And our crappy navigation
system.
1818
01:24:47,300 --> 01:24:49,420
Now, I couldn't
get you financing,
1819
01:24:49,420 --> 01:24:50,860
so you'll have to pay
cash up-front.
1820
01:24:50,860 --> 01:24:52,620
Is that acceptable?
1821
01:24:52,620 --> 01:24:54,620
- Yeah...
- Great.
1822
01:24:54,620 --> 01:24:55,700
Sign right there.
1823
01:25:00,140 --> 01:25:01,100
Wonderful.
1824
01:25:01,580 --> 01:25:02,540
Congratulations
on the new car.
1825
01:25:02,540 --> 01:25:03,500
Congratulations.
1826
01:25:03,980 --> 01:25:05,860
Now, if you'll excuse me,
I have to run.
1827
01:25:05,860 --> 01:25:06,900
Wait, I don't understand.
1828
01:25:07,380 --> 01:25:09,780
How can you sell me a car
for a dollar?
1829
01:25:09,860 --> 01:25:11,900
Volume.
1830
01:25:12,180 --> 01:25:14,100
Volume.
1831
01:25:14,580 --> 01:25:15,980
Makes sense.
1832
01:25:16,460 --> 01:25:17,900
Bring this back
when it's right.
1833
01:25:17,900 --> 01:25:19,340
Sure.
1834
01:25:26,060 --> 01:25:27,500
What?
1835
01:25:29,380 --> 01:25:30,820
David!
1836
01:25:32,020 --> 01:25:33,780
David!
1837
01:26:28,820 --> 01:26:31,220
David, uh...
1838
01:26:31,220 --> 01:26:35,060
would you mind if I skipped
our dinner tomorrow night?
1839
01:26:35,060 --> 01:26:36,500
We've had dinner together
every night
1840
01:26:36,500 --> 01:26:37,460
for the past two weeks.
1841
01:26:37,460 --> 01:26:39,860
I think I can fend
for myself one night.
1842
01:26:40,340 --> 01:26:41,580
Got big plans?
1843
01:26:41,580 --> 01:26:44,060
That buddy-buddy
thing worked.
1844
01:26:44,060 --> 01:26:46,940
Rose agreed to
have dinner with me.
1845
01:26:46,940 --> 01:26:50,340
I can't believe
how lucky I am.
1846
01:26:50,340 --> 01:26:52,260
I'm happy for you.
1847
01:26:54,620 --> 01:26:57,220
Still thinking
about Julie?
1848
01:26:57,220 --> 01:27:00,100
She thought
I was a player.
1849
01:27:00,100 --> 01:27:02,980
You were.
1850
01:27:02,980 --> 01:27:03,940
Great.
1851
01:27:04,020 --> 01:27:04,980
Well, thanks
for the help.
1852
01:27:05,100 --> 01:27:08,300
That's very helpful...
help.
1853
01:27:08,780 --> 01:27:10,220
David...
1854
01:27:10,700 --> 01:27:12,620
you gotta
ask yourself,
1855
01:27:12,620 --> 01:27:14,540
are you a player
1856
01:27:15,020 --> 01:27:18,420
or were you
just playing?
1857
01:27:18,900 --> 01:27:20,340
'Cause if she wasn't
interested
1858
01:27:20,820 --> 01:27:23,700
in the man you were,
1859
01:27:24,180 --> 01:27:27,060
she might be interested
in the man you are.
1860
01:28:04,740 --> 01:28:06,660
Excuse me.
1861
01:28:10,020 --> 01:28:11,460
Excuse me.
1862
01:28:14,500 --> 01:28:17,420
I think your
wash is done.
1863
01:28:17,420 --> 01:28:18,860
Thanks, David.
1864
01:28:22,020 --> 01:28:23,380
David.
1865
01:28:25,580 --> 01:28:27,460
How are you?
1866
01:28:27,500 --> 01:28:29,900
I'm good.
1867
01:28:29,900 --> 01:28:33,700
Uh, I'm... I'm...
I'm not good.
1868
01:28:33,700 --> 01:28:37,220
I miss you... a lot.
1869
01:28:37,260 --> 01:28:39,380
I miss you, too.
1870
01:28:45,300 --> 01:28:47,140
Listen...
1871
01:28:47,140 --> 01:28:49,060
I've been doing
a lot of thinking,
1872
01:28:49,060 --> 01:28:51,940
and I've made a lot
of changes.
1873
01:28:51,940 --> 01:28:52,980
I know.
1874
01:28:52,980 --> 01:28:55,460
I've seen you at the home.
1875
01:28:55,460 --> 01:28:59,780
And I think what you're doing
is wonderful and sincere,
1876
01:28:59,780 --> 01:29:02,180
and I really admire you.
1877
01:29:02,180 --> 01:29:04,020
You do?
1878
01:29:06,060 --> 01:29:07,460
Yeah.
1879
01:29:07,500 --> 01:29:11,300
Well, all that stuff that you
said about me before...
1880
01:29:11,340 --> 01:29:12,740
you were right.
1881
01:29:12,780 --> 01:29:15,180
But that was when I was
looking for something else.
1882
01:29:15,180 --> 01:29:17,100
I was... I was looking
for something
1883
01:29:17,100 --> 01:29:19,460
that wasn't important.
1884
01:29:19,500 --> 01:29:22,860
And now I'm
looking for...
1885
01:29:23,340 --> 01:29:24,900
a companion,
1886
01:29:25,420 --> 01:29:27,700
and I know that
the way to go about that
1887
01:29:27,700 --> 01:29:29,700
is to stop playing games
1888
01:29:29,700 --> 01:29:34,500
and to stop being
scared of...
1889
01:29:34,980 --> 01:29:38,740
whatever and to be
up-front with my feelings.
1890
01:29:41,740 --> 01:29:45,540
And my feelings are
1891
01:29:45,580 --> 01:29:48,900
that I care
about you...
1892
01:29:48,940 --> 01:29:50,820
deeply.
1893
01:29:50,860 --> 01:29:54,180
And I need you in my life.
1894
01:29:56,780 --> 01:29:57,860
And I wanna
be the type of person
1895
01:29:57,900 --> 01:29:59,780
that you would be proud
to be with,
1896
01:29:59,820 --> 01:30:02,180
not the type of
person that I was,
1897
01:30:02,220 --> 01:30:04,500
but the type of person that
I truly know I am.
1898
01:30:08,220 --> 01:30:12,020
When I met you, I was lost
1899
01:30:12,060 --> 01:30:15,860
and when
I found you...
1900
01:30:15,900 --> 01:30:17,780
I found me,
1901
01:30:18,300 --> 01:30:21,220
and I want you to
get to know that person.
1902
01:30:25,020 --> 01:30:27,380
I would really like to get
to know that person, too.
1903
01:30:34,260 --> 01:30:36,180
How about we start with
1904
01:30:36,180 --> 01:30:38,580
a get-to-know-you
dinner?
1905
01:30:40,980 --> 01:30:42,420
Okay.
1906
01:30:44,340 --> 01:30:46,740
Oh, you know, I have these
gift certificates
1907
01:30:46,740 --> 01:30:48,180
for this restaurant,
1908
01:30:48,180 --> 01:30:51,060
but they
expire on Sunday.
1909
01:30:51,060 --> 01:30:52,980
Oh.
1910
01:31:57,700 --> 01:32:00,420
We leave you two alone
for one minute.
1911
01:32:00,420 --> 01:32:02,340
All right, come on, Grandpa,
let's go fishing.
1912
01:32:02,340 --> 01:32:04,740
I think you need to
cool down a little bit.
1913
01:32:12,900 --> 01:32:16,260
It lessens the "G" forces
on your derriere.
1914
01:32:16,740 --> 01:32:18,180
So I've heard.
1915
01:32:22,020 --> 01:32:25,380
David's a very nice
young man.
1916
01:32:25,380 --> 01:32:27,300
Yeah.
1917
01:32:27,300 --> 01:32:29,220
His grandpa's pretty cute,
too, huh, Grandma?
1918
01:32:29,700 --> 01:32:32,100
Oh, yeah.
1919
01:32:32,100 --> 01:32:34,020
He's good in
the old sack, too.
1920
01:32:34,020 --> 01:32:35,460
Grandma!
1921
01:32:38,020 --> 01:32:39,940
Life is good, David.
1922
01:32:40,420 --> 01:32:44,260
We've caught ourselves
two beautiful babes
1923
01:32:44,260 --> 01:32:47,620
and have them eating out
of the palms of our hands.
1924
01:32:48,100 --> 01:32:51,460
And not only do
I have Rose,
1925
01:32:51,460 --> 01:32:54,420
but she wants to
keep dating other people.
1926
01:32:54,420 --> 01:32:55,940
Are you sure that's
what you want?
1927
01:32:55,940 --> 01:32:58,820
Yep, it's the perfect
arrangement.
1928
01:32:58,820 --> 01:33:00,740
Are you sure
that's what she wants?
1929
01:33:00,740 --> 01:33:02,420
Oh, yeah.
1930
01:33:02,420 --> 01:33:05,140
Well, I guess that does sound
like the perfect arrangement.
1931
01:33:05,140 --> 01:33:07,060
Yeah.
1932
01:33:07,060 --> 01:33:09,940
You know, Grandpa, you're
quite the bee's knees.
1933
01:33:11,380 --> 01:33:12,820
I prefer "chick magnet".
1934
01:33:37,300 --> 01:33:41,140
You know, the only problem is
he's still dating other women.
1935
01:33:41,140 --> 01:33:44,020
He doesn't seem to want
a real relationship.
1936
01:33:44,020 --> 01:33:45,940
And you do?
1937
01:33:45,940 --> 01:33:47,780
Oh, yes.
1938
01:33:47,780 --> 01:33:49,780
Listen, Grandma,
1939
01:33:49,780 --> 01:33:51,700
if you wanna
win the game of love,
1940
01:33:51,700 --> 01:33:54,100
you have to play the game.
1941
01:33:54,580 --> 01:33:56,500
Take David and me,
for example.
1942
01:33:56,500 --> 01:33:57,940
Remember the first
time I spotted him?
1943
01:33:58,420 --> 01:34:00,420
Oh, I remember.
1944
01:34:00,420 --> 01:34:03,220
Step one:
reconnaissance.
1945
01:34:03,220 --> 01:34:04,180
When a guy visits his
grandfather
1946
01:34:04,660 --> 01:34:05,620
at a retirement home,
1947
01:34:05,620 --> 01:34:09,780
it's a pretty good sign
he's a nice guy.
1948
01:34:09,780 --> 01:34:12,260
Step two:
the approach.
1949
01:34:12,260 --> 01:34:14,180
He's a bit of a player,
1950
01:34:14,180 --> 01:34:16,100
but deep down,
he's a good guy.
1951
01:34:16,100 --> 01:34:18,500
If you could just get
him to grow up.
1952
01:34:18,500 --> 01:34:20,580
You have to meet him or,
more accurately,
1953
01:34:20,580 --> 01:34:22,100
have him meet you.
1954
01:34:22,100 --> 01:34:24,500
You know, I can get him to play
football this weekend
1955
01:34:24,500 --> 01:34:26,900
if you want to
run into him.
1956
01:34:27,380 --> 01:34:28,180
Really?
1957
01:34:28,260 --> 01:34:29,380
Planned spontaneity...
1958
01:34:29,380 --> 01:34:31,780
That's the name
of the game.
1959
01:34:33,540 --> 01:34:35,940
Step three:
the buildup.
1960
01:34:35,940 --> 01:34:37,380
Get him interested by
showing him
1961
01:34:37,380 --> 01:34:39,300
you're smarter than he is.
1962
01:34:39,300 --> 01:34:42,660
James II was king in 1630.
1963
01:34:42,660 --> 01:34:45,780
I have no idea who the king
of England was in 1630,
1964
01:34:45,780 --> 01:34:49,060
but I didn't think
he was about to look it up.
1965
01:34:49,060 --> 01:34:51,620
Step four:
the follow-through.
1966
01:34:51,620 --> 01:34:53,140
He'll be chasing you,
1967
01:34:53,140 --> 01:34:55,460
but you don't have to
make it easy on him.
1968
01:34:55,460 --> 01:34:57,380
There was some
sort of poetic justice
1969
01:34:57,380 --> 01:34:59,060
in him doing his girlfriend's
laundry
1970
01:34:59,060 --> 01:35:01,380
months before I was
actually his girlfriend.
1971
01:35:01,380 --> 01:35:03,300
It's my girlfriend's.
1972
01:35:03,300 --> 01:35:05,220
Sure it is.
1973
01:35:05,220 --> 01:35:06,740
And because information is
everything...
1974
01:35:07,220 --> 01:35:08,180
Can we pay with these?
1975
01:35:08,180 --> 01:35:10,980
...it's always nice to have
someone on the inside.
1976
01:35:11,940 --> 01:35:13,380
And the most
important step,
1977
01:35:13,380 --> 01:35:15,220
step five:
the Groucho effect.
1978
01:35:15,220 --> 01:35:16,660
Your package is here.
1979
01:35:16,660 --> 01:35:18,180
Thank you.
1980
01:35:18,180 --> 01:35:19,700
It says that men
won't join any club
1981
01:35:19,700 --> 01:35:21,220
that would have them
as a member.
1982
01:35:21,220 --> 01:35:22,180
Whoa, wait, he's here!
1983
01:35:22,180 --> 01:35:24,100
I need you.
1984
01:35:24,100 --> 01:35:25,060
Oh, I'm so sorry, sweetie.
1985
01:35:25,060 --> 01:35:26,980
I'm running late,
I can't do it.
1986
01:35:26,980 --> 01:35:28,740
But my Uncle Paul's here.
1987
01:35:28,740 --> 01:35:30,180
He used to be
an actor.
1988
01:35:30,180 --> 01:35:31,060
Uncle Paul!
1989
01:35:31,060 --> 01:35:32,180
Unlike women,
men just don't know
1990
01:35:32,660 --> 01:35:34,580
when they've got
something good.
1991
01:35:34,580 --> 01:35:35,940
Hello.
1992
01:35:35,940 --> 01:35:38,340
But when you make him
work to get in the club,
1993
01:35:38,340 --> 01:35:40,180
he thinks he's lucky
to get you.
1994
01:35:40,660 --> 01:35:41,860
Okay, come with me.
1995
01:35:41,860 --> 01:35:45,300
And because men
sometimes fear commitment,
1996
01:35:45,300 --> 01:35:47,700
there's a step six:
1997
01:35:47,700 --> 01:35:49,620
the pull-back.
1998
01:35:49,620 --> 01:35:52,740
Give him a view of what
life would be like without you,
1999
01:35:52,740 --> 01:35:56,100
and that's when he'll realize
what he really wants.
2000
01:35:56,420 --> 01:35:57,780
In David's case,
2001
01:35:57,780 --> 01:35:59,220
there was nothing like
a one-night stand
2002
01:35:59,220 --> 01:36:02,900
to make him realize I wasn't
just another one-night stand.
2003
01:36:02,900 --> 01:36:05,140
She's the one.
2004
01:36:05,140 --> 01:36:06,540
It's a bit of a gamble,
2005
01:36:07,060 --> 01:36:09,420
but if you have patience
and you play the game right,
2006
01:36:09,460 --> 01:36:11,340
it pays off.
2007
01:36:13,380 --> 01:36:15,620
And with David...
2008
01:36:15,620 --> 01:36:17,140
it paid off.
2009
01:36:21,140 --> 01:36:22,580
Well, it sure paid off
for you,
2010
01:36:22,580 --> 01:36:24,980
but... I don't know.
2011
01:36:27,380 --> 01:36:28,900
Hey, Rose!
2012
01:36:28,900 --> 01:36:30,820
How about we eat dinner
early tonight?
2013
01:36:30,820 --> 01:36:32,340
I'm hungry.
2014
01:36:35,300 --> 01:36:37,660
Oh, sorry, sweetie,
2015
01:36:37,700 --> 01:36:41,220
but I told Mervin I would eat
dinner with him tonight.
2016
01:36:55,660 --> 01:36:58,420
PLAY THE GAME
- There's more... -
2017
01:41:54,380 --> 01:41:56,140
THE END
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