All language subtitles for Hey, you 1986

Hey, you, Luther Burbank!

- Me?
- Yeah, you.

Are you trying to kill these?

They're swarming
with aphides and rotenone.

Once a week I cut the grass,
and twice a week I water it...

These shrubs should be sprayed daily...

...with dichloro diphenyl trichloroethane.
- Huh?

DD and T. And they need fertilizer too,
lots of fertilizer.

I take my orders from in there.

In there is amateur night.

[SINGING]

Darling, that's simply awful.

I thought you liked my singing.

I did, but that was
before we were married.

Thank you.

So you finally shortened the sleeves.

Well, bless your little heart.

Come on, you lazy slug. Rise and shine.

[SPEAKING INDISTINCTLY]

Come again?

I said, Mother said I didn't have
to get up. She'd fix breakfast for you.

She said or you said?

She did. Oh, you know how Mother
loves to cook.

Who's gonna bathe and dress
and feed Annabella?

- Mother.
- Mother.

Well, it was her own idea, honestly.

Do you think it's fair
to lie around in the hay...

...and have your chores done
by the poor old lady?

Don't let Mother hear you
calling her a poor old lady.

After all, we're guests in her house.

And you're taking advantage of it.

I don't see why you're being
so disagreeable...

...just because I got a chance
for one day of rest.

Day of rest? You haven't had a chance
to get tired since we moved in here.

Now, get up!

Hi.

How are you this morning?

Hey, you're supposed to play with
these toys, not bean people with them.

Where's your granny?

- Good morning, Jerry.
- Good morning, Ma.

- How are you?
- Fine.

- And thanks for fixing my breakfast.
- You know I like to do it.

- Are the sleeves the right length now?
- Oh, they're perfect.

- Did you fix them?
- Well, sure.

Why, that little chiseler.

It comes over me I may've married
the wrong woman.

PETE: Ms. Halsworth.
- Yes, Pete.

- Can I see you a minute?
- All right.

Help yourself, dear.

- Ms. Halsworth.
- What's the matter, Pete?

Ms. Halsworth, are you satisfied
with my work?

Well, certainly. Why?

Ms. Halsworth,
I'm a very sensitive fellow.

Has that man
been bothering you again?

Fertilizer, fertilizer, all the time
he wants with more fertilizer.

Now, don't pay any attention to him.

And if he bothers you again,
you just tell him to see me.

Okay.

- Oh, here's your mail.
- Oh, thanks.

- Good morning, Mother.
- Good morning, darling.

- Are you all right?
- Of course I'm all right.

Oh, I'm so glad.

Annabella.

- Hello, darling. Is your breakfast all right?
- Yes, thanks.

- Just luscious.
- Jerry!

It must be very convenient to have
a leprechaun come in...

...and do your mending for you.
- Mother sews much better than I do.

- But she can't chisel as well.
- Your father.

What's the matter, Mother?

This month's check is $50 short again.

Well, he probably had to settle
a debt of honor.

He's probably in hock to his bookie.

Oh, Mother, I'm sure
that he has a very good reason.

Well, he's had some beauties
in his time.

I have to see the lawyer this afternoon.
Do you want to come?

Of course, Mother.
You know I'll stand by you.

I only meant you might want
to do some shopping.

I understand.

- What's with the lawyer, Ma?
- The divorce becomes final at midnight.

Oh, don't worry, Mother. All sorts
of things can happen before then.

I wouldn't count on it, honey.

You see, that's a perfect example.

- Example of what?
- Of how she needs me.

How utterly miserable she'd be if we
ever moved out and left her all alone.

Oh, for Pete's sake.

Your mother agrees we
should have our own place.

Well, that's because she's
being brave and unselfish.

She'd never be able to cope with
this divorce if I didn't stand by her.

All you want is a chance
to go on living the rich, full life here.

Jerry Denham, you're a complete heel!

You're beginning to sound like your
mother talking about your father. So long.

- Morning, Betty.
- Hello, Dad.

- Good morning, Mary.
- Good morning, Mr. Denham.

- Is the boss in yet?
- Yes, but he's all tied up...

...with the racing form.

All right, sweetie.

Come down and have lunch with me,
tell me all about it.

All right, darling,
see you at 1:00. Bye.

That was your wife.
She complains, among other things...

...you get up in the morning
and beat her with a club.

I couldn't find a club.
And I wish she'd stop griping to you.

- Mother-in-law trouble again, huh?
- No, wife trouble.

Your idiot child thinks it's our duty to
live with Miriam so she won't be lonely.

Your big mistake was moving in there
in the first place.

- My mistake?
- Now, don't misunderstand me.

I think Miriam is a perfectly charming
woman, full of admirable qualities.

- Hate to say a word against her.
- You're one to talk. Who got us into this?

- lf you hadn't divorced her...
- I didn't divorce her. She divorced me.

Yeah.

My pinheaded bride is still convinced you
and Miriam can get back together again.

Tell me, man-to-man,
is there any chance of that?

After what she took me for, no.

Not a chance in a million.

That woman, that cold-blooded,
calculating gold digger.

Only got the house, the furniture,
the car...

...my sock-stretchers
and 300 bucks a month in alimony.

And thousands of dollars' worth
of rare and valuable shrubs...

...which I planted with my own hands!

They're being ruined because that slob of
a gardener turns his nose up at fertilizer!

Pete's been complaining
you've been underfoot lately.

I won't let everything go to seed just
because I don't own the place anymore.

Has Miriam been complaining?

She thinks you haunt the place
too much, even for an ex-husband.

We're still best friends, aren't we?
Only took the fillings out of my teeth.

You weren't hurt so badly
if you still play the ponies.

Yes, this is just a hunch bet.
Annabella, in the sixth at Bay Meadows.

After all, it is the name
of my granddaughter.

[KNOCKING]

Come in.

They just phoned from the desk
to say...

...Mr. Victor Macfarland would be
checking in at 1.

Thanks, Peggy.

All right, my boy, get busy.

Round up all the available newsmen
and photographers as soon as you can.

- He's a publicity hound from way back.
- Okay, Hugh.

And, incidentally,
lock up all the available females.

He invented the forward pass.

And what makes it so difficult,
Daddy...

...is Jerry just doesn't understand
how poor Mother feels.

I used to have the same trouble.

Much as I'd love to have a place
of our own...

...I won't desert her until she's
had a chance to adjust...

...to the awful wrench
of being on her own.

Rubbish, baby.

Your mama's happy as a clam.
We're on very friendly terms.

Oh, but, Daddy, husbands and wives
should be on the friendliest of terms.

What Mother ought to have...

If there's anything else she ought
to have, it's not from me.

I'm so strapped I can't even buy back
my laundry.

- Hughie!
- Hello, Joyce.

Honey, those pictures you had taken
of me were marv!

There's one in the newspaper.
The rest will be taken by the magazine.

- Thanks a bucket.
- Not at all, baby.

Let the world know
you're loaded with talent.

Oh, this is my daughter, Mrs. Denham.

- Barbara, this is Joyce Mannering.
- How do you do?

Honey, your father's been so divine
with me...

...that sometimes even I feel like
calling him "Daddy."

HUGH: Nothing at all, a few
publicity shots on her balcony.

Is it true Victor Macfarland's coming
here? I was in the beauty parlor...

He's due any moment.
You want to meet him?

Who wouldn't want to meet a man
worth millions who isn't bald?

I was reading about him
in TIME magazine.

They say he's the most eligible bachelor
in the U.S.

- And you'd like to talk him out of it?
- Uh-huh.

Okay, Joyce, I'll fix it.

Honey, you're not even human.
You're just a living doll.

Nice to have met you, Mrs. Denham.

Oh, really, Father.

I'm an eligible bachelor too.

- Playing around with a girl half your age.
- She's a little more than that.

- But it happens to be strictly business.
- Mm-hm.

Barbara, my job is to make myself
charming to visiting celebrities.

Joyce won a beauty contest
as Miss Cucamonga...

...and has a contract to model.

She's posing for cheesecake
and trying to better her lot.

I suppose you'd like it if Mother
was with other men.

I'm only protecting Joyce.
I'd do the same for your mother.

Personally, I think you two ought
to get together again.

And today's your last chance to make up
before she gets her final decree.

Forget it, baby. Get used to the idea
that you're a child of divorce.

But if you could only see
how unhappy poor Mother is.

Why, she's just moping
around the house all day...

...and tossing in bed all night.

She's so lost and helpless.

Your mother is about as helpless
as a steam shovel.

I can still see her in court, never batting
an eyelash while they pumped me dry.

- lf she came to me on her knees...
- Don't exaggerate.

- I know you want her back.
- Barbara.

- I see you hanging around the house...
- Why don't you grow up?

- Running to Pop every time we argue.
- We weren't even talking about you.

Victor Macfarland checked in...

...with two secretaries,
six filing cabinets and 57 trunks.

- What does he keep in those trunks?
- Old telephone numbers.

Well, I've got to run. Cheer up, honey.

Hello? Yes.

Yes, this is the Macfarland suite.

I can't talk now. We're checking in.

In the bedroom with all that, please.
What?

Let me call you back, will you?
Thank you. Yes.

That goes in there too.

Are you going to London
to represent America...

...to the International Monetary Fund?
- Let's not jump the gun.

My name hasn't even been submitted
to the Senate yet, said he modestly.

Mr. Macfarland,
this is your hometown, isn't it?

- Yes. I haven't been back in 20 years.
- Why did you come back?

Well, off the record,
the Senate loves a grassroots boy.

Any other reasons?

Oh, perhaps to show off a little
for the Ladies page.

Do you have any words
for the growing boy...

...on how to become a millionaire?

Well, my dear young man, anybody can
do it with a little luck and my brains.

Mr. Macfarland, how is it
that you are still a bachelor?

I'd be glad to talk it over
with you later, off the record.

- May I?
- Yes.

Just a moment. Let's keep
our photographs on a high level.

PHOTOGRAPHER:
Thank you.

Thank you.

- Hello, Hugh.
- George.

Jerry.

Hail the conquering hero.

- Hello, Hugh.
- Hugh Halsworth!

Kids, get yourselves a drink.

What are you doing here?
You own this hotel?

No, I didn't make a million dollars.
I just work here.

This is great! We've got
to see a lot of each other.

- We will. I'm in charge of publicity.
- It's good to see you again.

Wasn't sure you'd want
to see me, Vic.

Thought you might just like
to forget about me.

Now, is it likely that I would forget
the man who married my best girl?

Oh, it's all right.
No hard feelings now.

Meet my assistant, Jerry Denham.

- A pleasure, Mr. Denham.
- Same here.

Give him the full treatment. Big man,
big deal, local-boy-makes-good...

...rags-to-riches. Don't be afraid
of overdoing it. That's Vic.

The reason your boss is being
so charming to me is...

...a long time ago we were
in love with the same girl.

That's very interesting.

It was more than interesting
at the time.

By the way, how is Miriam?

Miriam? Oh, fine, I guess.
I mean, all things considered.

She was one of the most exciting,
one of the most...

Does she still look as sharp
as she did?

Well, you know, time and tide.
None of us are getting any younger.

- She looks great.
- She does, huh?

- Just great.
- Why are you being so coy and cagey?

Don't you trust your own charm? Are you
afraid I might steal her away from you?

No, not at all. It's just that it
was a long time ago.

- She was just a kid. She's changed.
- Only for the better.

Is that so?
I'd love to see her again.

Why don't you and she
have dinner with me tonight.

Oh, I'd love to, Vic,
but I'm afraid Miriam has other plans.

I think that you're afraid
to let me get near her.

Don't be silly. Why should I be?

Why should he be?
After all, they're divorced.

Divorced? Oh, what a shame.

Hughie, why didn't you tell me?

Maybe we should have sent
you an announcement.

Oh, I'm sorry, of course.

I've always had a hunch it wouldn't last.
You never were quite Miriam's type.

That's right. It only took her 20 years
to find out. Mind if I get a drink?

Uh, young man.

You've met Mrs. Halsworth, obviously.

Oh, yes, quite often.

I suppose he was untrue to her?

No, nothing like that, just cruelty.
Nice, clean-cut, extreme cruelty.

I don't mean to be inquisitive.

You see, Miriam was my first real love.

Many years ago, I had the ball on
the one-yard line and lost it on a fumble.

And you'd still like to score?

You're a very clever young man.
Is Miriam still living here in town?

She certainly is. Has a nice little house
only a few blocks from the hotel.

You don't know the address?

I ought to, I'm living with her.

I beg your pardon?

We're related.
She's my mother-in-law.

I can't believe it. Miriam has
a daughter old enough to be married?

- That's a matter of dispute.
- But he's married to her anyway.

It doesn't seem possible.

I married Miriam straight out
of high school.

Very shortly after you left town
so abruptly.

- Remember?
- Yes.

Just a minute, please.

- Ferguson.
- Yes, Miss Jessup?

It's Washington calling Mr. Macfarland.
Senator Chase.

Excuse me, sir. Senator Chase
is calling from Washington.

Oh, thank you, Ferguson.

Don't you go away, young man.
I want to talk to you.

You know, I think he's charming.
Absolutely charming.

You're not subtle. You abandoned hope
of my taking Miriam off your hands...

...so now you concentrate
on Victor.

- I don't follow you.
- Oh, yes, you do.

You want to move out,
have your own home...

...and you know you won't budge
your wife until Miriam is set.

Well, why not?
They obviously used to be pretty cozy.

Miriam might like to grab
the number one bachelor.

I can assure you, my boy,
Miriam will cheerfully spit in his eye.

BARBARA: Mother.
- Mm-hm?

There's something I've got
to talk to you about.

- Oh, really.
- What's the matter?

Oh, they're making such a fuss
over Victor Macfarland.

He made a few million, so now he
can afford to work for the government.

- What difference does it make to you?
- None at all.

- Did you know him?
- Casually.

How casually?

Hm? Mm...

Just casually.
What'd you want to talk to me about?

- I had lunch with Daddy today.
- That was nice.

It was not nice, not at all.

Daddy may fool a lot of people,
but he can't fool me.

- There's something wrong with him.
- What do you mean?

There were lots of pretty girls around,
and he didn't even look at them.

Oh, something must be wrong.

He just stared and stared, as if his mind
were 1000 miles away.

Uh-huh. Del Mar's opening next week.

Oh, no, Mother,
you just don't understand.

It's you. He's so terribly wretched
without you.

Oh, Barbara.

Yes, Mother.

Barbara, for the last time, I will not
discuss your father and me anymore.

- All right, Mother.
- Come and help me fix dinner.

It was a nice try.

[HUMMING]

Despondent.

HUGH: Hi.
- Hi, Daddy.

- How are things, Grandma?
- Don't call me "Grandma."

- What are you doing here?
- A little work in the garden.

I pay Pete $30 a month to take care
of the garden.

That butcher! You want those shrubs
out there to die?

Honestly, you'd think he lived here,
the way he breezes in and out.

He still has a latchkey.

Well, why not, Mother?

Legally, he's still your husband.

Oh, don't be silly.

Now, while I fix the salad,
you make the dressing.

Oh, Mother, you make the dressing.
You make it so much better than I do.

JERRY: Hi, Hugh.
- You can't afford those.

I have a very rich friend.

JERRY: Hi.
- Hi.

- Hi, honey.
- What in the world is that?

Just a few exotic blooms
from the Orient.

Oh, darling, you were so sweet
to make up.

But you didn't have to go overboard.

They're not for you.
They're for your mother.

- Huh?
- That's right, Ma.

For me?
Well, what on Earth?

- Well, read the card, Mother.
- Yeah, read it. I'm on pins and needles.

Victor Macfarland?

Well, it looks like
the only thing he forgot...

...was a ribbon saying "rest in peace."

He has a nerve, sending me flowers.

Very charming.
He's making like a diplomat already.

Victor asked me to bring them.
He said to tell you if you want...

I don't wish to hear anything
about Mr. Victor Macfarland, ever.

Annoyed at him about something?

What'd I tell you? Hell hath no fury,
and so forth and so forth.

- What did he mean by that?
- Search me.

Must have been some lively goings-on
when they were young.

I can't afford
to buy you fancy flowers like Victor...

...not after certain deductions
are made from my salary.

But I would like you to have
this one perfect rose...

...which I grew with my own hands.

You're breaking my heart.

- Don't you realize what day this is?
- Mm-hm.

My lawyer reminded me, in triplicate.

Keep an eye on the stove.
I'm going up to change.

Aren't you going to ask Daddy
to stay for dinner?

What for?

This is the last day that you and he...

Well, he just adores tamales,
and he's working so hard.

- lf you want to invite him.
- Oh, no, it's your house. You ask him.

Well, he's probably gone anyway.

Well, really!

- What's the matter?
- What on Earth are you doing?

Putting on a clean pair of pants.

I will not have you keeping
your clothes in this house!

I told him that he could, Mother.

Why, there's practically no closet space
in his hotel room...

...and he couldn't possibly keep
all of his things there.

Oh, never mind.

Where do you think you're going?

To get a handkerchief. I keep some
in a drawer with your things.

You don't believe in the sanctity
of divorce, do you?

It's all right for people
who've never been married.

I've been sort of hoping
you'd miss me around here.

Oh, I have. I thought about you
every time I picked up the phone...

...and didn't find your bookie
on the other end.

So I make an occasional bet. If you'll
begrudge a man his simple pleasures...

Simple pleasures, my foot.
Gambling was a disease with you.

Like alcohol with some people,
or taking dope.

I don't even take aspirin.

You're being unreasonable.
It's not as if I didn't love you.

You loved your horses, your roses
and then me, in that order.

Win, place and show.

That's not fair. In 20 years, I never
even looked at another woman.

Sometimes I wish it had been women.
At least they don't run every day.

If I'd lost a lot of money,
I could understand your attitude.

But I used to win.

When I think of all the nights
I sat home with a book...

...while you were off playing poker
with the boys.

The only problem you had
to face was...

...whether to trade the car in
every year or every other year.

It's humiliating to have your husband
arrested in a gambling raid.

It was more humiliating to me.
I had a full house, aces high.

- And the way you behaved in court.
- The way I behaved?

Telling the judge you couldn't afford
to pay 300 dollars a month alimony.

And then offering to toss him for it,
double or nothing.

He had no sporting blood.

Here.

Miriam.

Now, you'd better get out of here.

I've got to shower and change.

I've watched you change before.

Let me know if your zipper gets stuck.

[CLEARS THROAT]

Suppose I told you I'd quit gambling.

We've had that line before.

I almost believed you,
till that shady character turned up...

...with $800 you'd won.
- I've explained it a dozen times.

That was a bet I'd made on
the winter book, months before.

Winter book, summer book, what's
the use? You'll never stop gambling.

- Do you want to bet?
- Uh...

All right, I don't claim
to have reformed overnight.

You didn't leave me enough money
to gamble with.

Good. I wanted to teach you a lesson.

Even if it means destroying
a marriage?

This is when two people need
each other most...

...when their children are grown-up
and have families of their own.

Don't you suppose I've thought
about that?

Your daughter suggests you
might like to stay for dinner.

I have a better idea.
Why don't you and I go out for dinner?

You seem to forget that at midnight
our divorce is final.

Let's forget it. Let's even forget
we were ever married.

Let's pretend it's our first date,
when we were kids.

After dinner we can go for a drive.

You remember that little spot
on the beach where we used to park?

- Oh, no.
- Liar.

Oh, that's an old trick.

You hit your funny bone,
it's a reflex action.

You always did have beautiful reflexes.

Daddy's up there with Mother.

Girl, he told me, not a chance.

You've had a whole year
away from me.

Are you any happier now?

MIRIAM:
I'm content.

That's not the same thing.

Haven't there been times in the past...

...when you've felt just
a little bit lost and lonely?

MIRIAM:
Yes. And you?

HUGH:
I've been miserable.

MIRIAM: Barbara said you were,
but I thought it was only because...

Because she wanted us together?
Is that such a bad idea?

Miriam, listen to me.

You look beautiful.

Well, it's only a dress.

You did ask me to dinner, didn't you?

I sure did.

What are they doing up there?

I don't know,
but I'm hoping for the best.

- Meanwhile, we'll starve to death.
- Oh, here they come.

JERRY: Boy, you look like 100 cents
on the dollar.

- Do you think it's too much, darling?
- Oh, no. Your figure isn't bad at all.

Just as good as yours, tootsie.

- Your father and I are going to dinner.
- Oh, that's wonderful.

Don't wait up for us.
We're liable to be late.

[PHONE RINGS]

Oh, I'm sorry, Hugh. Just a minute.

Hello? Mr. Halsworth?

Yes, he's right here.

What?

Tell him that Annabella came home
to pay 1630...

...in the seventh at Bay Meadows.

Yes, I'll be sure to tell him.

- Miriam.
- Mother.

[DOORBELL RINGS]

Miriam.

Miriam, darling.

But, Victor!

Let me see you.

You look wonderful.
Time and tide indeed.

I don't believe it. After all this time,
to see you, to hold you again.

Why, it's something I never
stopped thinking about.

But, Victor, I must say you took me
completely by surprise.

What are you doing here?

What do you think I'm doing here?
I'm taking you to dinner.

Hugh was supposed to tell you,
but, then, Hugh never could be trusted.

And we're going to make up
for a lot of lost time.

- I don't like the way he's leering at her.
- You're fighting me.

I expected to see you sitting
in a wheelchair...

...the way Hugh talked about you.
You are lovely, Miriam.

I left a little girl, and now I come back
to find a woman.

Oh, yes, definitely a woman.

I want you to meet my daughter,
Barbara.

This is Mr. Macfarland, dear.

I don't believe it. No.

She's a younger sister
you never told me about.

- Oh, brother.
- How do you do?

- How do you do?
- I believe you've met Jerry.

Oh, yes. Yes, indeed.

We're old friends. Our minds seem
to run in the same channel.

And, of course, Hugh.

Yes, good old Hughie.

Aren't you up a little late?
You look tired.

I'll take a vitamin pill and stay
for the second show.

I want to thank you
for the beautiful flowers.

- She threw them in the ashcan.
- Oh, no.

No, Miriam. Why?

There are some things flowers
can't explain, Vic.

Oh, you mean about my running away?

I want to talk to you about that.

Why don't we run up the coast
to a pretty spot I know...

...and have a nice, quiet, intimate dinner,
wipe the slate clean.

Sorry, old man,
but she's having dinner with me.

Oh, was I? We can't be rude
to Victor, can we?

I'd like to make it my life's work.

Oh, same old Hughie. Lots
of enthusiasm, but no staying power.

Well, in that case,
why not let me join you both?

I've got a better idea.
We can have dinner right here.

That's right. We'll make it a buffet.

- There's not enough.
- Oh, I'm sure there is.

I'm not very hungry, and your father
just lost his appetite.

Fine. I'll make the coldest,
driest martinis for auld lang syne.

Jerry! Jerry, you listen to me.
Will you stop butting in?

I'm trying to bring Mother and Daddy
back together.

I don't want Victor
to gum everything up.

Get the ice. Here's a terrific chance
for her not to be lonely.

This is quite a guy. Old beau, big catch,
and, as for dough, he's loaded.

If these martinis will do
as much for your mother.

I'm warning you, keep out of this.

It's every man for himself.
Go and knock some canap�s together.

I was terribly happy to hear
about your divorce.

Terribly sorry I didn't hear
about it sooner.

Vic, you haven't changed a bit,
just as brash as ever.

I'll ask you a brash question.

Is it customary for the ex-husband
to haunt the house of his ex-wife?

There's nothing personal in that.
It's just you inhibit me.

We are not divorced finally
and legally until midnight.

Shall we synchronize our watches?

He doesn't live here, of course.

I'll eat in the kitchen
if I'm depressing you.

Why, not at all, Hughie.
I've always liked you very much.

Just that I like Miriam more,
so why don't you run along?

You know, I think that's a good idea.

We have so many things to talk about,
I don't know where to begin.

Suppose you begin by telling me why
you left here without saying goodbye.

Now that I'm here, I feel like I haven't
been away at all. I wish I hadn't.

- You haven't answered my question.
- Don't make me answer.

Let me look
at what I've been missing.

- Who's for plasma?
VICTOR: Right here.

To our memories of the past
and our expectations of the future.

[BABY CRYING]

That's funny.
It sounded exactly like a baby.

Of all the low, shabby tricks.

She wants to say good night
to her granny.

Yes. Come on, darling.

Well, now you know the worst, Vic.

- Yours?
- Of course.

Didn't you know that Mother's
a grandmother?

Time and tide.

- I'll take her.
- Yes. Back to bed, honey.

Well, Miriam, you have found
the secret of eternal youth.

Bologna, if I'm not mistaken.

Black, please.

How long are you planning
to stay?

With you? Forever and a day.
With one exception.

As soon as the Senate calls a hearing,
I'll have to fly back to Washington.

- Then what?
- London, for the Monetary conference.

And, after that,
probably to my place in Capri.

We used to have a bungalow
at Laguna.

You were telling us about your house.

Just a little spot
where I go to relax.

Built in the 15th century.
Really beautiful rose garden.

You don't say.
Is your garden very buggy?

- Our roses here are just lousy with aphis.
- I'm sure his garden is just fine.

I hope you'll see it with me, Miriam,
on my next trip there.

Who knows.

Oh, my, it's getting late.
I guess I must be tired after your trip.

You have had a pretty big day.

I'll drive you back
to the hotel, Hugh.

That won't be necessary.
I have a car and driver waiting outside.

You've kept the poor guy sitting there
all this time? Very inconsiderate of you.

Never mind him, Vic.

At midnight I want you
to help me celebrate.

- Come on, let's take these dishes out.
- Okay.

I'll help too.

You know,
I'm being much too nice to you.

- You still haven't...
- Have you ever been to Europe?

No. Somehow, I've never managed
to get east of Las Vegas.

I can see where I'm going to
have to take you out of this rut.

JERRY:
What's the matter?

- Did you see what that man was doing?
- I thought he was very sweet.

Sweet? Right before my eyes
he was playing footsie with her.

- Oh, Daddy.
- And she was helping.

- But you distinctly said...
- Nobody asked you for your opinion.

What a coincidence.

They were playing that tune
the first night you let me kiss you.

That song hadn't even been written
the first time you kissed me.

- Are you sure?
- Oh, really.

- Jerry.
- Has he made any passes?

He'd better not try, that's all.

Haven't heard your mother
screaming for help. I think she likes him.

I think you're simply awful.

You'd marry Mother to any stranger
on the street.

You're talking about the glamour boy
of American industry.

Daddy may not be glamorous,
but he's good enough to be her husband.

I'm afraid Daddy's running out
of the money.

- What's the matter?
- Very strange smell.

Nothing strange about it.
Nice, clean fertilizer. A dollar a sack.

Paid for it out of my own pocket too.

Oh...

Does he always hang around like this?

I mean,
did he get custody of the garden?

No, no.

I know there are divorces
where the ex-husband, the ex-wife...

...still see each other, and still go out
with each other and everything.

It's nothing like that.
He just tries to make a pest of himself.

Then you'll have to be firm with him.

In my pursuit of you, I have no desire
to see his sad eyes watching us.

I'm much too softhearted.

Seriously, Vic. He's devoted to Barbara
and the baby and to his roses.

- And you.
- Oh, no. That's finished.

Let's not talk about him anymore.
In a few minutes, I'll be a free woman.

It's about time Mother
was getting to bed...

...if she's gonna get up
and give the baby her 6:00 bottle.

Just for once, you can get up
in the morning and feed your own child.

- I wonder where Daddy is.
- I left him out on the patio sulking.

- Daddy. Daddy, I'm ashamed of you.
- Me? Have you seen what they're doing?

Don't be a sad sack. You said before
you didn't want to make up with her.

I most certainly do not.

But, Daddy, you're still in love with her.
You know you are.

You can't be proud now.

If she wants to flirt shamelessly
with Victor Macfarland...

...it's a matter
of complete indifference to me.

- Now you're talking.
- You be quiet.

I don't want her to do anything foolish.
She doesn't know this guy like I do.

I'm really amazed.
She's giving him the full treatment.

But, Daddy, it's your duty to me
and the baby to protect her.

You're right.

You're absolutely right.

Uh-oh.
Better keep Vic on the hook.

Miriam, may I speak to you
for a moment in the kitchen?

I'll be right back.

Haven't you made enough trouble
for one night?

- You're going to make a fool of yourself.
- Really?

Victor Macfarland is the top philanderer
of the Western Hemisphere.

No matter what our situation may be,
I don't want to see you get hurt.

Very sweet of you, considering you've
taken care of that rather nicely yourself.

Miriam, listen to me.
You know his type.

A mustache puller. There have
been hundreds of women in his life.

Naturally. He's a man of the world.

You're the first girl he ever knew and lost.
That's a challenge to that kind of man.

You couldn't be more wrong.
He says he's never stopped loving me.

You don't believe that.

I suppose you think
he wouldn't marry me.

Not even if you drugged him.

- So you don't think I could do it?
- I'll lay 20-to-1 against.

You're on.

- Thought you don't approve of gambling.
- This will be a pleasure.

[CLOCK CHIMING]

Hey, you just made it. This
is something of an occasion, isn't it?

We ought to have a toast.
Nothing morbid, something cheerful.

- I'd like to make it...
- It only rang 11.

Do you consider that an ill omen?

[CLOCK CHIMES]

Ring out the old...

...ring in the new.

[UP-TEMPO MUSIC PLAYS]

Nice shot.

Take it easy, kid.
You look a little pooped.

- Did you get a copy of the final decree?
- Mm-hm.

I'm having it framed,
next to my cancelled alimony checks.

Most athletic courtship I've ever seen.

Way you follow me, people will
think you're the house detective.

Why, Miriam, no such thing.

My job is to report on activities
of the hotel.

Distinguished guests, romances,
infatuations.

Good to see you too.

- Hughie.
- Hello, baby.

How are things going?

You said you're gonna do something
about it.

- About what?
- That Victor Macfarland.

My motor's been racing
since I first laid eyes on him.

Well, I think I can arrange for you
to meet him, through a mutual friend.

Who's that woman
who's always with him?

She never gives anybody else
a chance.

- I'll see that you meet her too.
- Thanks, doll.

[PLAYING MID-TEMPO MUSIC]

Happy?

I don't know what's come over me.

- I feel like a different woman.
- I told you I'd get you out of the rut.

- It's almost as if you'd never been away.
- I never should have gone.

[MUSIC ENDS]

- You know, you've never told me why...
- I'll tell you, but not tonight.

We're having too much fun.

Oh, Miriam,
this Senate call seems to be in limbo...

...and I was wondering,
have you ever been to Mexico?

Hugh and I started for Acapulco
on our honeymoon...

...but the horses were running
in Caliente, so we never got any further.

Why don't we fly to Mexico City and
let me show you how wonderful it is.

There's nothing we'd do in Mexico City
that we can't do right here.

We were saying, you two are
the handsomest couple on the floor...

...next to us.

Oh, how gauche of me.

Miss Mannering, Mr. Macfarland
and the ex-Mrs. Halsworth.

And, Vic, Joyce has been terribly eager
to meet you and dance with you.

You'll let him go for a few minutes,
won't you?

Who is that, your new bookie?

Don't leave me. You're the only woman
I know who can follow me.

I've given that up.

Talked to Barbara. She said
you didn't get in till 4 this morning.

She was quite wrought up about it.

I wish that child would mind
her own business.

Oh, come now, be fair.

You protected her virtue,
now she's trying to protect yours.

- Cast your bread upon the waters.
- You on the defense committee too?

I can assure you, his intentions
are not honorable.

- But it's no longer my affair.
- I couldn't agree with you more.

- Mrs. Halsworth's very lovely, isn't she?
- Yes, she is. Very.

- Everything considered, I mean.
- Hm?

I hope I look half as good
when I'm a grandmother.

Oh, I'm sure you will.

Here they come now.
Hugh wants you back.

I'm afraid Miss Mannering much prefers
you as a dancing partner, Hughie.

- Can't we get out of here?
- We certainly can.

Why don't we have dinner up
in my apartment.

- All the privacy in the world.
- Yes.

What happened
to that vibrating motor of yours?

He turned off the ignition.

[SPEAKING INDISTINCTLY]

- Shall I open the wine, sir?
- I'll handle that.

Thank you, sir.

- Is there anything else I can do, sir?
- I'm afraid not, Ferguson.

Good night.

Isn't it wonderful to get away
from the crowd and be alone like this?

I think it is.

Miriam, you're the most exciting,
desirable woman I've ever known.

Well. And you're an expert on women.

I mean it, darling.

You said that once to me
20 years ago, remember?

We were both just crazy kids then.
But we're not now.

We've got a lot
of unfinished business.

Where's my champagne?

Miriam, I'm crazy about you.

Now may I have my champagne?

I'm so lucky to have come back
just when you're free.

Oh, it's a great feeling.

And you don't even know
what it means yet.

I'll never get married again
as long as I live.

Why should you?
Why do you think I've stayed a bachelor?

To live life as you see it,
as you feel it, to the full.

With no responsibilities
to someone else.

I know.

Miriam, I will paint you a canvas
so grand...

...that you'll forget this penny-postcard
life you've been living.

We'll go to London, then the Riviera,
always together.

Oh, Vic, you mean you and I?

Life can be no fun if you play it safe.

For you and me it will be gay
and mad and romantic.

And illegitimate.

- Darling, you don't understand.
- Oh, of course, I do.

Vic, grandmothers can't go gallivanting
around the Riviera.

You mean...
You mean, you and I will be just...?

Friends.

Friends?

Mm-hm.

We certainly can't be anything else.

I'm not going to... How do
they say it? "Slip away with you."

I wouldn't marry you if you were
the last man on Earth.

- Am I that bad?
- No, Vic.

You've been a bachelor too long. You'd
make the worst husband in the world.

- I wouldn't be so sure about that.
- Oh, you're spoiled, honey.

Girls fall in love with you
at the drop of a hat.

You've had your own way
much too long.

Well, maybe I'm tired of all that.

Maybe I'm searching
for something else.

Well, then you'll have to find it
with somebody else.

A husband is something
I can do without very nicely.

Oh, Miriam, you're being cruel. Look
at me, I have everything, except you.

And I want you.

- We shouldn't see each other anymore.
- Why?

Oh, because there's no future in it.

I'm not going to marry you,
and you're not going to marry anybody.

- And never the twain shall meet.
- Oh, Miriam, you can't walk out like this.

- Why not?
- Darling, I'm 20 years late...

...but I never make
the same mistake twice.

Jerry.

Jerry.

- What's the matter?
- I'm terribly worried about Mother.

- Now what?
- Well, it's after 3:00.

What do you suppose she's doing?

Probably necking someplace
with Victor.

That's not very nice.

Well, maybe not, but it sure used
to be fun, remember?

[DOOR CLOSES]

There she is now.

Want me to bawl her out
for sneaking in late?

You're not a bit funny.

Mother?

- Well, are you two still awake?
JERRY: Slightly, Ma.

Mother, what's happened to you?
Why, you're positively glowing.

Does it show that much?

Wow, what a knickknack.
Congratulations in order?

Mm-hm. Victor and I will be married.

Are you sure you know
what you're doing?

I always have before.

Well, tell us, Ma. How'd you nail him?
I mean, how'd it happen?

We'd been dancing in the Crystal Room,
and then we had dinner in his apartment.

Well, one thing led to another,
and, all of a sudden, he proposed to me.

- Was it his idea or yours?
- Don't be silly, dear.

You should've seen Victor. He got the
manager up to open the jewelry shop...

...so he could pick out this ring.

- When are you going to marry him?
- On Thursday, darling.

But that's only three days off.

Victor didn't want to wait that long.
He's due in Washington.

You'll be going with him, naturally.

We're leaving right after the wedding.

When he gets his appointment,
we'll fly to London.

And then we'll have
our real honeymoon in Capri.

Oh, please be happy for me, darling.

But, Mother,
how will Daddy feel about this?

Oh, I think he'll approve.
After all, it was his own suggestion.

Does he know already?
Did you tell him?

No. We both thought it would be nicer
if he heard it from Victor.

[BABY CRYING]

Oh, bless her heart.
She probably needs...

- Mother, I'll go.
- No, let me do it.

In a few days,
I won't have the chance anymore.

Well, that's that.
Worked like a charm, didn't it?

What do you expect me to do,
pin a medal on you?

Honey, it's not your life,
it's your mother's.

This is what she wants.
He'll make a wonderful husband for her.

Well, at least, a husband.

But Mother's so naive about men.

Naive? How'd she get
to be a grandmother?

It just happened to her.

Your mother can look after herself,
and we'll start looking after ourselves.

First thing tomorrow,
I'm going house-hunting.

- Poor Daddy.
- We're not moving in with your father.

Miriam, the time has come for us
to face facts in a sensible manner.

No.

Miriam, my dear,
you're so understanding.

Don't you think we should be
sensible about this?

I realize I've said harsh things.

I know I've called you a gold digger,
but I didn't mean it.

It was my welfare you were thinking of,
and I was too blind to see it.

It was my welfare you were thinking of,
I was too blind to see it.

After all, you never had a thing
against me except a harmless, little vice.

Nothing ever really came
between us, Miriam...

...except this shameful, hideous vice,
of which I am now completely cured.

Could you ever forgive yourself
if now, out of wounded pride...

...yes, or even out of spite,
you should make a tragic mistake...

...with a man who once walked out
of your life without even a word?

After all, we have a child,
even a grandchild.

Don't you think we owe it to them,
these innocent loved ones...

...to let bygones be bygones?

Believe me,
my motives are entirely unselfish.

Remember, if you should decide
to marry this man...

...I would save $300 a month
in alimony.

No, Miriam, I'm thinking
of your happiness and my happiness.

Or, may I say, our happiness?

- Well, good morning.
HUGH: Good morning.

Well, aren't you energetic
this morning.

My dear, the time has come
for us to face facts.

Did you see Victor last night,
after we left?

No, I did not.
Miriam, the time has come...

- Didn't you hear from him?
- No. Mir...

Why?

I thought he might have
telephoned you.

Well, I'll be...

You owe me 20 dollars.
We're going to be married Thursday.

I see.

You have my very best wishes.

- Hello, Mother.
- Hello, darling.

- May I help you?
- No, I'm fine.

- Did Victor call?
- At least 10 times.

And there's a whole pile
of messages inside for you.

I just hope I'm ready by tomorrow,
that's all.

- And these flowers just came for you.
- Isn't that sweet of Victor.

Now, why did he have
to do a thing like that?

Well, Pop, I'll be seeing you.

Why, sure, thanks. I'd love a drink.

And don't look so rattled.
I have as much right here as Victor has.

More.

Mother, don't you think this is rather...?
Well, rather...

Of course it is, darling.

Hi, Barbara, Miriam.

What's he doing here?

He came with me to see the bungalows.
Then he asked him in for a drink.

They're very nice homes, Barbara.
Just ideal for a young couple.

Are you buying all this stuff
with my money?

You should be happy to get rid of me.

It'll give you an extra $300 a month
to bet on the horses.

Your mother has a one-track mind.
All she ever thinks about is gambling.

[DOORBELL RINGS]
MIRIAM: I'll get it.

Is she still planning on getting married
at the hotel?

As far as I know.

- This is very interesting.
- I don't like the way he said that.

- Why, Daddy?
- The banquet manager notified me...

...that Victor was canceling
the arrangements for tomorrow.

- Hello.
- I've been trying to reach you all day.

Oh, I'm sorry.
There were so many things to do.

Miriam, something urgent
has come up.

Can you be packed and ready to leave
for Washington at 7:30 tonight?

Tonight? But we're getting
married tomorrow here.

We're going to have
to change our plans.

I've just been notified by the Senate
committee to appear tomorrow morning.

The invitations are out,
and all the arrangements are made.

We'll get married in Washington.
It'll be much more exciting.

The chief justice of the Supreme Court
is an old friend.

He'll be delighted
to perform the ceremony.

That'll make us constitutional too.

Oh, but I'm not packed or anything,
and my hair has to be done...

...and... When do we have to leave?
- I have to leave in 40 minutes.

- Forty minutes. I couldn't possibly...
- Now, darling, don't get upset.

I'll make your reservation
on the noon plane tomorrow.

I'll meet you in Washington.

Oh, this isn't the way
I planned things at all.

Well, we've waited for 20 years, darling.
Surely one more day won't matter.

Oh, of course not,
but you've just taken me by surprise.

But you know how terribly important
this Senate thing is.

It might mean an ambassadorship,
or a place in the Cabinet.

I know. Barbara.

- What about her?
- I wanted her to be at the wedding.

Well, that's simple. Bring her along.

- That's not so easy with a small child.
- I'll be glad to babysit for you.

Are you here again?

I told you this guy was going
to walk out on you.

You don't amuse me.

I have to check out at the hotel.

If you'll see me off,
I'll pick you up on the way to the airport.

MIRIAM: Yes, dear.
VICTOR: Goodbye.

If you're going to go off
to Washington, and the kids move out...

...what happens to the house?

I've had an offer
from the McDermotts.

They want to tear this place down
and build a swimming pool.

- What about my rosebushes?
- Speak to the McDermotts.

Maybe they'll let you come around
once a week and chase away the bugs.

Can't figure that woman out.

He postpones the wedding,
she takes it.

Very simple explanation:
She's in love.

- Sometimes your husband revolts me.
- I know just what you mean.

Well, darling, this is it.

One thing. Now that I'm leaving,
I wouldn't let Hugh hang around.

Oh, he makes me so mad.

Now that we're engaged,
you're in the public eye.

Like Caesar's wife,
you have to be above suspicion.

I promise not to disgrace you.

It isn't that. It's just that those senators
might not be so broad-minded.

I've made your reservations
on the noon plane tomorrow...

...and arranged for your baggage.
- Thank you.

- Goodbye.
- Goodbye.

- Goodbye.
- Goodbye, darling.

I'll call you as soon
as I get to Washington.

Vic!

Vic, before you go,
I've got to know something.

- I haven't time.
- No, stop evading the issue.

If we're to be married,
I insist you tell me.

Isn't it enough for you
that I love you?

Yes, it is. But I want to know
why you ran out on me 20 years ago.

I prefer that you get that
information from Hugh.

Don't you think
I've tried to gouge it out of him?

He just grins at me
with that silly look on his face.

- I haven't got time. I'll tell you someday.
- No, tell me now.

- It's all very silly, but if you insist...
- Talk louder! I can't hear you!

[SPEAKING INDISTINCTLY]

If I give them a down payment,
we could be out of escrow in a week.

And there's an automatic
garbage-disposal unit in the kitchen...

- Are you listening?
- Why do we have to rush into this?

- lf Mother is going away and all...
- No dice. We're not staying on here.

But, darling, we don't even own
a stick of furniture.

We'll start from scratch,
like other married people.

I know. Why couldn't we just
buy this place from Mother?

For one thing, we can't afford it.

For another, we can't afford it.

Daddy. Yes, that's it.

Daddy could come in on it with us.

You know how he feels
about his garden.

And, anyway,
he shouldn't be living in a hotel.

Honey, listen. You're my wife
and I'm your husband.

There was a line in the ceremony,
"forsaking all others."

That's all I'm asking.

I love your mother and father,
but I don't want to live with them.

That's quite obvious.

You married Mother off to the first man
that came along to get rid of her.

I married her off?

- You threw Victor at her from the start.
- She caught the throw, didn't she?

If you'd only stop for a minute
to consider my feelings, or Daddy's.

You're upset because your mother
won't be around any longer...

...to wait on you hand and foot.
- You'll wake up the baby.

It's time you stopped hanging
on to your mother's skirts.

What's wrong with wanting
your parents to be happy?

- Or living where you grew up?
- This may be your home, but it's not ours.

I'm not spending a minute more here.

If you're in such a hurry,
why don't you go right now?

You'd like that, wouldn't you?

You'd figure that would keep your
mother from leaving tomorrow.

- I never thought of that.
- But you're thinking about it now.

You make me sick. I don't care
when you move out or where.

- You can live anyplace you want to.
- That's what I intend to do.

I'll be at the hotel until you
and Annabella care to join me.

Don't count on it.

That monster.
How could he do a thing like that to me?

- Mother, what's the matter?
- lf he dares to show his face here again...

- Did Victor do something?
- I'm not talking about him.

I'm talking about your father.

- What did Daddy do?
- Never mind.

Of all the contemptible, shabby,
unpardonable things.

I'd like to tell him...

I will tell him.

Come on, let's play poker.
Knock it off, boys.

- Bet your aces.
- Bet five.

Get me a refill, will you, sweetie?

[PHONE RINGS]

JO YCE:
Scotch and soda, please.

Hello? Well, I don't think he can
be disturbed now. Just a moment.

Hughie, it's that woman
you were married to.

- Sit in for me, will you?
- Sure, doll.

Yeah, this will be
something now, boys.

Hello, Miriam.

I just want you to know
that I think you're the lowest, vilest...

...most horrible creature
in the whole world.

What?

And, furthermore, I'm going to tear out
every one of your rosebushes...

...with my bare hands and leave them
here to wither and die.

Three queens. I won.

- Hughie, I won.
- Good girl.

Deal me out, fellas.

Mother, will you please
tell me what happened?

He's ruined my life, that's all.

- You're not going to marry Victor?
- Of course I'm going to marry him.

But if you mention
that other man again...

- What's the trouble?
- That goes for you too.

Don't you dare mention
his name in this house.

- You mean Victor?
- No. I mean your father-in-law.

Well, why? What happened?

I'd like to brain him,
that's what I'd like.

- I thought you were packing.
- You got my suitcase full of old letters.

Letters from you.
For all I care, you can burn them.

Got a match?

- What's the matter with you two?
- Oh, nothing.

- Jerry's just leaving me, that's all.
- What?

- Oh, Mother.
- Oh, darling.

Oh, no, no.
Now, stop acting like a baby.

I guess we just don't have any luck with
our men. Divorce just runs in this family.

No, nonsense. Now, come here.

- Come on, come over here.
- Oh, Mother.

- Now, tell me all about it.
- I told you.

Jerry doesn't want to live
with me anymore.

Now, if you mean he doesn't want
to live here anymore, I don't blame him.

You two should have had
your own home long ago.

Anyway, you can't go to Washington
now and leave me all alone.

Oh, no, Barbara.

Now, I'm not going to rearrange
my whole life for you.

It's high time you grew up and learned
how to solve you own problems.

Now you're going to turn against me,
just like Jerry.

Well, I don't care
what either of you do!

HUGH: Pete, George, be careful when
you put those rosebushes on the truck.

Hugh, what are you doing sneaking
around at this time of the night?

Shh. I need help.

Have you been drinking?

Desperate situations call
for desperate measures.

- What do you think you're doing?
- Moving my rosebushes.

- Where to?
- Don't know yet.

But I'm not going to let
Miriam destroy them.

Here, pitch in.

Start on this one.

- Say, where are you going?
- To the hotel.

I had a fight with Barbara.

Incidentally, what did you do
to make Miriam so sore at you?

Me? Nothing.

I was just spending a quiet evening
at home, holding three queens...

Well, something must have happened.

She's been ranting about you
since she got back.

Thought she was just angry
because a girl answered the phone.

She still up?

Yes. But, unless you're heavily insured,
I wouldn't.

Hold the fort.

Hugh, I'm warning you.

[RINGS DOORBELL]

- I should like to talk to you.
- Go away.

- I never wanna see your face again.
- I have a right to know...

I have nothing to say to you.
Now, go away!

- Who was it?
- Your father.

Oh.

Go to bed.

If you don't stop, I'll call the police.

I wish to demand to know what that
mysterious telephone call was all about.

All right, I'll tell you.

Did you or did you not shoot craps
over me with Victor 20 years ago?

- Did you say craps?
- Yes, I said craps.

- So Victor told you.
- Is it true?

Yep. We rolled for you behind
the girls' gym at Jefferson High.

Loser to say nothing and blow.
He lost.

He blew.

That's the most disgusting
thing I've ever heard.

Don't look at me.
Victor gambled for you too.

- I'm sure it wasn't his idea.
- You're right.

Victor never had an idea in his life.

At least he's a man of honor.
He kept his word.

He never mentioned it until tonight
when I forced him to.

I knew I couldn't trust him
to keep his mouth shut.

Oh, you've messed up my whole life.

As I see it, I saved you
from making a big mistake.

But don't expect me to do it again.

If it hadn't been for you, I could've
been married to Victor 20 years ago.

That would make me a bachelor,
and Victor a grandfather.

No, I don't think he'd like it.

I'm just glad I divorced you before
I found out what a heel you really were!

[KNOCKING]

[DOORBELL RINGING]

JERRY: What do I do now?
- Lift it ever so gently.

Gently.

Easy. Easy.

What's going on here?

Who wants to know?

- He wants to know.
- We're gardening.

- In the middle of the night?
- Eliminates the danger of sunstroke.

- Do you live here?
- Well, not exactly...

...but these are my rosebushes.

Have you got any identification
on you?

Well, I got a mole
on my right shoulder.

What are we wasting time for?
Let's run them in.

- Go ahead, arrest me.
- Hugh.

- I dare you. I double-dare you!
- I can explain the whole thing.

- This man's my father-in-law.
- That's nice. Who are you?

He's my son-in-law.

Abbott and Costello.

- Do you own this house?
- No, but I live here.

- What's with those bags?
- He's moving out.

- Enough of this. Let's run them in.
- Now, wait a minute.

Ask at the house, they'll tell you.

They're not being very sociable to us,
but maybe they'll talk to you.

- Maybe it's Jerry.
- Jerry's been gone half an hour.

That's your father again.
And we're not going to answer.

- Good night, Mother.
- Good night.

- Nobody answers.
- Natch.

But I know they're in there.

Must be playing possum.

You take care of these characters.
I'll come along with the truck.

Uh-huh.

I'm warning you. If anything happens to
those rosebushes, I'll sue for everything.

- Including your pensions.
- What's the rhubarb?

We caught these guys digging up
a strange lawn and carting stuff away.

They're mine. I'll lead them
around town on a leash if I want.

- Yeah?
- Yeah.

- Say, isn't that a polyanthus?
- No, a hybrid tea. I bred it myself.

How'd you get that pink flush
around the border?

I crossed a President Hoover with a Queen
Mary. Took seven years to propagate.

I'm having trouble with my climbers.
Maybe you can help me.

- May I use the phone?
- Sure.

- I do not need a lawyer.
- I'm going to call Miriam. Excuse me.

OFFICER: Are your roses buggy?
HUGH: Out here, the roses...

...are just loaded
with aphis and rotenone.

[PHONE RINGS]

Hello?

Yes, dear.

What are you doing
at the police station?

But what...?

Yes, but...

- All right. All right, I'll be right down.
- Thanks, Ma. Goodbye.

- Was that Daddy?
- No, for a change, it's your husband.

Jerry?

Pardon me.

He got himself arrested somehow
and wants me to go identify him.

- I'll go with you.
- We can't both go.

- Somebody's got to stay with the baby.
- I'm still married to Jerry.

- lf he's in trouble, it's my duty to go.
- You go. I'll stay here.

No. I wouldn't know what to do.
We'll have to take Annabella with us.

All right.

- Come on, give out.
- Why'd you call us here?

- We've been in jails before.
- Just be patient.

- You said it was big.
- Strictly the woman's angle.

Is this a local joke,
or can we put it on the wires?

Is the future
Mrs. Victor Macfarland news?

- Sure, good as gold.
- Well, there she is.

REPORTER:
Mrs. Halsworth...

- No, not now.
- Mother, please.

- Have you told Mr. Macfarland about this?
- Oh, Jerry.

- Do you plan to marry right away?
- Are you all right?

- Sure.
- I'm sorry I said all those mean things.

And I'll live anywhere you want me to.

One divorce in this family's enough.

I might have guessed
you were mixed up in this.

- You know this man?
- Only too well.

Tell them who those rosebushes
belong to.

Is this why you dragged me here
at 1:00 in the morning?

I didn't even know you were coming.

I don't care what he does with his
rosebushes or what you do with him.

- That's all we wanted to know.
- Thanks, lieutenant.

- I'll get you that booklet on leaf mold.
- Thanks.

If I knew you were here,
I wouldn't have come.

Don't you know better
than to bring a baby here?

- It's not a place for grownups either.
- I didn't tell you to come.

[SPEAKING INDISTINCTLY,
OVERLAPPING]

MAN:
Hold it!

Well, will you try again, please?

Those reporters are still out there,
clamoring for a statement.

- No comment.
- lf you don't speak, they'll get you...

...on the way to the Senate hearing.
- Why is this happening today?

Just a minute.
They still can't reach Mrs. Halsworth.

Operator, this is Victor Macfarland.
I've had this call in all morning.

I don't believe the line
has been busy this long.

All right. Please check with the local
operator to see if the line is out of order.

Jerry, what color's the kitchen?

- Blue, I think.
- Oh, that's nice. I like blue.

- Hi.
- Hi.

I'll change my clothes,
then drive you to the airport.

- Sure it's all right for you to miss work?
- I've got a very easy-going boss.

[DOORBELL RINGS]

- That must be the express man.
- I'll get it.

- Well, hello.
- Why aren't you at the office?

Why aren't you?

Miriam.
So you're really serious about this?

I thought you were supposed
to stay away from here.

I came by to get my clothes,
if you don't mind.

Well, make it snappy.

My, aren't we in a foul mood
this morning.

Thanks to you,
I didn't get any sleep last night.

HUGH:
Funny, I slept like a baby.

If it's all right, I'd like to go upstairs
and get my handkerchiefs.

I'm surprised you
still don't keep your toothbrush here.

I do. It's in the garage
with my shaving kit.

I've got a going-away present
for you.

- My latchkey.
- Oh, thanks.

[PHONE BUZZING]

The operator's trying to get you.

Hello? Yes, it is.

No, I don't want any calls.

Washington? All right, I'll take it.

- Hello, Victor?
- Miriam, I've been going crazy!

Miriam, I've been going crazy
trying to reach you.

What is all this in the papers about your
involvement with Hugh and the police?

It's much too complicated
to explain it to you now.

I'll tell you all about it
when I get to Washington.

That's just it,
you can't come to Washington now.

The reporters have been hounding me.
They'll be at the airport.

The whole thing will degenerate
into a three-ring circus.

- But, Victor, I'm all packed.
- Still trying to wriggle out of it, is he?

I've already changed my plans
for you once.

If you'll just hold off until this thing
blows over and I'm confirmed.

Listen, I've been waiting
for this break for 20 years.

I thought you'd been waiting for me
for 20 years.

That's telling him.

Did I hear Hugh's voice?

- What's he doing there?
- He's getting his things out of my room.

You're still seeing him
after what happened last night?

- Victor.
- You can 't come here.

- Victor!
- The reporters are hounding me.

Victor!

Victor, stop yelling
about Caesar's wife.

- I'm not your wife, and you're not Caesar.
- He always did have a temper.

[DOORBELL RINGS]
I'll answer the door.

Being engaged
doesn't give you the right to...

Well, I have certain rights too. And
one of them is to become disengaged.

Well, if that's the way
you feel about it.

Now, Miriam, you mustn't be rash.

That kind of publicity right now
can do me just as much harm as...

I'll send you the ring.
Airmail, registered, special delivery.

MAN: Halsworth?
- Oh, no. No Halsworth here.

I'm afraid you must have the wrong
number. Try up the street a block.

The man with the baggage.
Told him he had the wrong house.

Don't look so smug.
I want no part of you either.

Any man who'd shoot craps
for a woman...

It was the luckiest roll of my life. I've
always kept those dice as a souvenir.

That's the one thing I can never forgive
you. It proves you didn't really love me.

And here I've gone along
all these years thinking that I did.

If you loved me, you wouldn't take the
chance of losing me on a roll of the dice.

Miriam.

What's the matter with you?

- Here.
- What?

Roll them.

- What for?
- Come on.

Four and three. So what?

Throw them again, harder.

Uh-uh.

You... You cheated.

That was the only time in my life.

But the stakes were pretty high.