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Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:00:02,306 --> 00:00:05,092 - ♪ Boo, boo, boo, boo 2 00:00:05,135 --> 00:00:09,313 ♪ Boo, boo, boo, boo ♪ 3 00:00:09,357 --> 00:00:13,274 ♪ Boo, boo, boo, boo 4 00:00:13,317 --> 00:00:17,408 ♪ Boo, boo, boo, boo ♪ 5 00:00:17,452 --> 00:00:21,499 ♪ Boo, boo, boo, boo 6 00:00:21,543 --> 00:00:24,067 ♪ Boo, boo, boo, boo ♪ 7 00:00:24,111 --> 00:00:25,068 - [laughs] 8 00:00:25,112 --> 00:00:26,200 Ooh! [growls] 9 00:00:26,243 --> 00:00:27,766 - Mommy! - Aaaaaaah! 10 00:00:27,810 --> 00:00:29,159 - Duncan! - Duncan! 11 00:00:32,119 --> 00:00:33,250 - Hurry up, Duncan. 12 00:00:33,294 --> 00:00:36,862 - Hang on. I'm still making my gift. 13 00:00:36,906 --> 00:00:39,300 - Let him focus. The thumb is the hardest part. 14 00:00:39,343 --> 00:00:41,084 - Time's up. We're going in. 15 00:00:41,128 --> 00:00:42,259 all: [grunt] Happy anniversary-- 16 00:00:42,303 --> 00:00:43,565 [scream] 17 00:00:43,608 --> 00:00:45,436 - What are you doing to Mommy? - [grunting] 18 00:00:45,480 --> 00:00:47,221 - Mommy and I are just pounding it out. 19 00:00:47,264 --> 00:00:49,353 - [grunting] 20 00:00:49,397 --> 00:00:51,703 Obviously, he means the dust from this rug. 21 00:00:51,747 --> 00:00:53,270 It's spring cleaning day. 22 00:00:53,314 --> 00:00:55,272 - It's your anniversary. - We know. 23 00:00:55,316 --> 00:00:57,100 That's how we remember it's time to tidy up. 24 00:00:57,144 --> 00:01:00,321 - And to do our taxes. [squeals] 25 00:01:00,364 --> 00:01:01,496 - Well, here's your gift. 26 00:01:01,539 --> 00:01:04,020 - Oh, Dunkie. It's your best one yet. 27 00:01:06,283 --> 00:01:09,156 - Yeah, I'm already working on my Thanksgiving one. 28 00:01:09,199 --> 00:01:10,287 - Oh, cute. 29 00:01:10,331 --> 00:01:13,116 Okay, tubs re-caulked, 30 00:01:13,160 --> 00:01:16,380 chimney swept, and fire extinguisher charged. 31 00:01:16,424 --> 00:01:17,903 - [screams] 32 00:01:17,947 --> 00:01:20,254 - And I cleaned the dust off the ceiling fan. 33 00:01:20,297 --> 00:01:21,733 - How did you get up there? 34 00:01:21,777 --> 00:01:24,258 - Does it really matter? Hey. 35 00:01:24,301 --> 00:01:25,128 [phone buzzes] 36 00:01:25,172 --> 00:01:28,566 - Ooh, text alert from House Warehouse. 37 00:01:28,610 --> 00:01:30,394 "Spring cleaning price slash." 38 00:01:30,438 --> 00:01:32,353 They've got air filters on sale. 39 00:01:32,396 --> 00:01:35,399 The ones we like! - There's air filters you like? 40 00:01:35,443 --> 00:01:36,226 - Duncan, get in here. 41 00:01:37,836 --> 00:01:39,969 - Your father and I are going to the home improvement store 42 00:01:40,012 --> 00:01:41,188 and we need you to watch Jing. 43 00:01:41,231 --> 00:01:42,798 - But I have plans with my friends 44 00:01:42,841 --> 00:01:45,322 to throw old TVs in the quarry and watch them explode. 45 00:01:45,366 --> 00:01:47,194 Why do I always have to watch Jing? 46 00:01:47,237 --> 00:01:48,586 Kimberly's old enough. 47 00:01:48,630 --> 00:01:50,980 - Well, Kimberly's not here, is she? 48 00:01:51,023 --> 00:01:52,286 - I'm right here. 49 00:01:52,329 --> 00:01:54,592 Ignoring the middle child is so cliché. 50 00:01:54,636 --> 00:01:57,987 - We don't ignore you. We just forget you. 51 00:01:58,030 --> 00:02:00,424 - Do you wanna watch Jing? - I'd be happy to. 52 00:02:00,468 --> 00:02:03,340 So which are the outlets that are okay for her to lick? 53 00:02:03,384 --> 00:02:05,603 - None. Duncan, you have to stay. 54 00:02:05,647 --> 00:02:07,170 - [groans] - Yay! 55 00:02:07,214 --> 00:02:09,433 - [laughs] - Kimberly will come with us. 56 00:02:09,477 --> 00:02:12,175 Her tiny hands can sort through cabinet screws. 57 00:02:12,219 --> 00:02:14,308 - And she'll get our undivided attention. 58 00:02:14,351 --> 00:02:15,352 Where'd she go? 59 00:02:15,396 --> 00:02:17,441 - She must already be in the car. 60 00:02:17,485 --> 00:02:18,442 - [groans] 61 00:02:18,486 --> 00:02:22,229 - So Jing, ready for a nap? - I just woke up. 62 00:02:22,272 --> 00:02:24,318 - Yeah, me too. But I could sleep. 63 00:02:24,361 --> 00:02:25,884 - I'm too excited to sleep. 64 00:02:25,928 --> 00:02:29,540 I have the whole day with the greatest brother in the world, 65 00:02:29,584 --> 00:02:31,803 and I don't want to miss one second of it. 66 00:02:31,847 --> 00:02:34,980 Let's go. - Ugh, slow down. 67 00:02:35,024 --> 00:02:37,374 My big legs can't keep up with your little ones. 68 00:02:43,511 --> 00:02:45,208 - What are you gonna do first? 69 00:02:45,252 --> 00:02:47,341 I'm gonna go watch the plant-watering demonstration. 70 00:02:47,384 --> 00:02:49,212 - Uh, checking out the bird feeders. 71 00:02:49,256 --> 00:02:50,213 [tapping window] 72 00:02:50,257 --> 00:02:52,868 - Hey. - Ooh, forgot her again. 73 00:02:53,956 --> 00:02:55,479 - Sorry, honey. 74 00:02:55,523 --> 00:02:58,526 Somebody just earned a ride on the pony express. 75 00:03:01,398 --> 00:03:02,225 Ride 'em, cowgirl! 76 00:03:02,269 --> 00:03:04,488 [Western music] 77 00:03:04,532 --> 00:03:06,490 - Get off. You're gonna catch fire. 78 00:03:06,534 --> 00:03:07,839 - Let me burn. 79 00:03:09,406 --> 00:03:11,930 - So Hector's looking for clues to find treasure, 80 00:03:11,974 --> 00:03:13,367 and he needs our help. 81 00:03:13,410 --> 00:03:16,065 - I'm looking for clues to find treasure, 82 00:03:16,108 --> 00:03:18,110 and I need your help. 83 00:03:18,154 --> 00:03:20,852 - We'll help you, Hector. - He can't hear you, Duncan. 84 00:03:20,896 --> 00:03:23,246 - Thanks for your help. 85 00:03:23,290 --> 00:03:25,857 Now let's look at the clues I've collected. 86 00:03:25,901 --> 00:03:30,688 A bike seat, a bike handlebar, and a bike wheel. 87 00:03:30,732 --> 00:03:33,125 Can you figure out what it is? 88 00:03:33,169 --> 00:03:34,214 - A bike. - A jet ski--a bike. 89 00:03:36,390 --> 00:03:37,304 - It's a bike! 90 00:03:37,347 --> 00:03:40,263 both: Yeah! - Let's see. 91 00:03:40,307 --> 00:03:44,093 One ear of corn, boop, one slice of bread, beep. 92 00:03:44,136 --> 00:03:47,270 Oh, the diet starts tomorrow, am I right? 93 00:03:47,314 --> 00:03:48,489 [both laugh] 94 00:03:48,532 --> 00:03:50,360 - Wanna donate to Save the Planet? 95 00:03:50,404 --> 00:03:52,710 - No way. [both laugh] 96 00:03:52,754 --> 00:03:55,147 - Annie, this is the garden hose 97 00:03:55,191 --> 00:03:56,714 we've waited our whole lives for. 98 00:03:56,758 --> 00:03:58,977 - On the commercial, a gorilla could not bite through it. 99 00:03:59,021 --> 00:03:59,978 And it tried. 100 00:04:00,022 --> 00:04:01,502 - If you guys don't hurry up, 101 00:04:01,545 --> 00:04:04,113 I'm calling an Amber Alert on myself. 102 00:04:04,156 --> 00:04:05,984 - Calm down, Kimber. We're almost done. 103 00:04:06,028 --> 00:04:07,551 - [gasps] Jack, 104 00:04:07,595 --> 00:04:09,901 a paint drying demo, and it just started. 105 00:04:09,945 --> 00:04:11,512 [both giggle] 106 00:04:13,470 --> 00:04:14,515 - That's it. 107 00:04:14,558 --> 00:04:15,994 I'm gonna flirt with the stock boys, 108 00:04:16,038 --> 00:04:18,432 and move in with the one that's also in a band. 109 00:04:18,475 --> 00:04:19,563 - Hmm, yeah. Sounds great honey. 110 00:04:19,607 --> 00:04:21,435 Have fun. - [groans] 111 00:04:21,478 --> 00:04:23,524 - In about 20 minutes, 112 00:04:23,567 --> 00:04:25,569 you'll start to see hints of yellow. 113 00:04:25,613 --> 00:04:27,267 - Don't tell me what's gonna happen. 114 00:04:30,139 --> 00:04:31,488 - Name of the game is Memory. 115 00:04:31,532 --> 00:04:33,098 You flip two, you get to keep them. 116 00:04:33,142 --> 00:04:34,317 Here we go, here we go. 117 00:04:37,581 --> 00:04:40,541 - Match. - You're lucky you're cute. 118 00:04:40,584 --> 00:04:43,370 - Okay, weirdly, Jing, this has been fun. 119 00:04:43,413 --> 00:04:45,807 But you need to take a nap. - No! 120 00:04:45,850 --> 00:04:49,463 Can we do one more thing? Please? 121 00:04:49,506 --> 00:04:51,465 - [sighs] Okay, what do you wanna do? 122 00:04:51,508 --> 00:04:54,598 - Let's get married! - Not this again, no. 123 00:04:54,642 --> 00:04:57,340 - But why? - I'm your brother. 124 00:04:57,384 --> 00:04:59,342 - I don't care. I love you. 125 00:04:59,386 --> 00:05:00,604 Marry me. - No. 126 00:05:00,648 --> 00:05:04,347 - Marry me, marry me. - No. 127 00:05:04,391 --> 00:05:05,435 [electronic beeps] 128 00:05:05,479 --> 00:05:08,482 - Marry me, marry me. - No. 129 00:05:09,439 --> 00:05:11,833 - Marry me, marry me. - No. 130 00:05:11,876 --> 00:05:13,574 [snores and gasps] 131 00:05:13,617 --> 00:05:15,358 - Marry me. Marry me. 132 00:05:15,402 --> 00:05:17,708 - Stop saying "marry me." - Stop saying, what? 133 00:05:17,752 --> 00:05:19,493 - "Marry me." - I will! 134 00:05:19,536 --> 00:05:24,541 I thought you'd never ask. [vocalizes giddily] 135 00:05:29,111 --> 00:05:32,419 - Duncan. Dude, you missed so much fun. 136 00:05:32,462 --> 00:05:34,725 I thought watching TV was good, 137 00:05:34,769 --> 00:05:38,250 but watching TVs explode is even better. 138 00:05:38,294 --> 00:05:41,732 - Yeah, 4K blow up good, but OLED, blam! 139 00:05:41,776 --> 00:05:43,604 - What's with the tie? Going to court? 140 00:05:43,647 --> 00:05:46,520 - Jing is making me do this stupid make-believe wedding. 141 00:05:46,563 --> 00:05:48,086 - She finally wore you down, huh? 142 00:05:48,130 --> 00:05:49,653 - Mazel tov. 143 00:05:49,697 --> 00:05:51,438 - I love weddings. My mom's had three of them. 144 00:05:51,481 --> 00:05:52,656 [car horn honks] 145 00:05:52,700 --> 00:05:54,658 - This one's gonna stick. I promise, baby. 146 00:05:54,702 --> 00:05:55,659 - Four. 147 00:05:55,703 --> 00:05:58,619 - This is adorable. Do you have a minister? 148 00:05:58,662 --> 00:06:00,490 - No. Why? 149 00:06:00,534 --> 00:06:04,233 - And the denizens of hell would scream, 150 00:06:04,276 --> 00:06:08,106 but for the brimstone in their mouths! 151 00:06:08,150 --> 00:06:10,979 And so it is in love. 152 00:06:11,022 --> 00:06:17,464 ♪ Hallelujah 153 00:06:18,595 --> 00:06:19,640 - What's going on? 154 00:06:19,683 --> 00:06:21,424 - Your son's marrying your daughter. 155 00:06:21,468 --> 00:06:23,470 New air filters? Nice. 156 00:06:25,472 --> 00:06:26,603 [car chimes] 157 00:06:26,647 --> 00:06:28,431 [knocks on car window] - Seriously? 158 00:06:28,475 --> 00:06:29,693 - Whoops, did it again. 159 00:06:29,737 --> 00:06:31,478 - As long as I can remember, 160 00:06:31,521 --> 00:06:33,915 which is about 10 months ago, 161 00:06:33,958 --> 00:06:36,483 I've always wanted to marry you. 162 00:06:36,526 --> 00:06:38,702 - She can do so much better. 163 00:06:38,746 --> 00:06:42,489 - Duncan, I promise to always be loving and fun, 164 00:06:42,532 --> 00:06:44,578 just like Mommy and Daddy... 165 00:06:44,621 --> 00:06:47,058 - They wanna be us. 166 00:06:47,102 --> 00:06:48,712 - ...Used to be. 167 00:06:48,756 --> 00:06:51,454 And not sad and boring, like they are now. 168 00:06:51,498 --> 00:06:53,674 - Sad and boring? 169 00:06:53,717 --> 00:06:55,502 - We are not sending them a gift. 170 00:06:59,680 --> 00:07:02,552 - Thank you for marrying me, Duncan. 171 00:07:02,596 --> 00:07:05,033 - Oh, well, it was easier than that memory game. 172 00:07:05,076 --> 00:07:06,730 - Is that what you kids think of our marriage? 173 00:07:06,774 --> 00:07:08,645 That we're boring and no fun? 174 00:07:08,689 --> 00:07:10,691 - Yeah, but, like, only when we think about it, 175 00:07:10,734 --> 00:07:11,692 which is not a lot 176 00:07:11,735 --> 00:07:13,171 'cause, you know, it makes us sad. 177 00:07:13,215 --> 00:07:14,521 - Hey, you guys lasted longer 178 00:07:14,564 --> 00:07:15,652 than most of my friends' parents. 179 00:07:15,696 --> 00:07:17,262 - We're still married. 180 00:07:17,306 --> 00:07:19,613 - And we appreciate that you've stayed together for us. 181 00:07:19,656 --> 00:07:21,484 - Yeah, I don't wanna have to learn stepparents' names 182 00:07:21,528 --> 00:07:22,703 and say stuff like, 183 00:07:22,746 --> 00:07:24,618 "Thanks for coming to my track meet, Chuck," 184 00:07:24,661 --> 00:07:25,923 and "Are you living here now, Shirley?" 185 00:07:25,967 --> 00:07:28,622 - There's nothing wrong with our marriage. 186 00:07:28,665 --> 00:07:29,971 - Really? 187 00:07:30,014 --> 00:07:31,755 You think it's normal to spend your anniversary 188 00:07:31,799 --> 00:07:33,627 debating which color plunger to buy? 189 00:07:33,670 --> 00:07:36,717 - I just think black is cliché. - And I think red is too showy. 190 00:07:36,760 --> 00:07:39,720 You're begging for a home invasion. 191 00:07:39,763 --> 00:07:41,939 - Oh, my God, Jack. They're right. 192 00:07:41,983 --> 00:07:43,506 - Yeah, we suck. 193 00:07:43,550 --> 00:07:45,682 In high school, we were the life of every party. 194 00:07:45,726 --> 00:07:48,772 Everyone called us Madonna and Sean Penn 195 00:07:48,816 --> 00:07:49,730 because of my love of lace gloves 196 00:07:49,773 --> 00:07:51,122 and your hair-trigger temper. 197 00:07:51,166 --> 00:07:52,559 - What happened to us? 198 00:07:52,602 --> 00:07:54,778 - It's okay, you know? You had a good run. 199 00:07:54,822 --> 00:07:56,737 - Why don't you sit on the porch, and read the paper, 200 00:07:56,780 --> 00:07:57,868 and say, "Guess who died?" 201 00:07:57,912 --> 00:07:59,783 - I'll bring you warm milk. 202 00:07:59,827 --> 00:08:02,525 - And I'll stand on the lawn so you can tell me to get off it. 203 00:08:02,569 --> 00:08:04,745 - Do not talk to us like we are old people, 204 00:08:04,788 --> 00:08:07,530 Buster Brown, Little Missy, and Suzy Q. 205 00:08:07,574 --> 00:08:08,749 - Come on, Mother. 206 00:08:08,792 --> 00:08:10,228 We've got an anniversary to celebrate. 207 00:08:10,272 --> 00:08:12,535 - Damn straight. Let me fetch my shawl. 208 00:08:12,579 --> 00:08:13,797 - Ooh, fetch mine too. 209 00:08:18,715 --> 00:08:21,326 - Ah, now this is more like it. 210 00:08:21,370 --> 00:08:24,155 [both wailing] 211 00:08:24,199 --> 00:08:27,594 - No anniversary celebrating. Store policy. 212 00:08:27,637 --> 00:08:29,944 - But we don't know where else to go. 213 00:08:31,380 --> 00:08:33,121 Popcorn, milady? 214 00:08:33,164 --> 00:08:36,864 - Ooh, I feel like the Duchess of Sussex, Meghan Markle. 215 00:08:38,735 --> 00:08:41,999 [both snoring] 216 00:08:42,043 --> 00:08:43,610 - [sighing] All right. 217 00:08:46,830 --> 00:08:49,354 - [panting] - [gasps] 218 00:08:49,398 --> 00:08:52,836 - Ooh, nibble-- - Yes? 219 00:08:52,880 --> 00:08:54,838 - Hair. - Okay, first roll. 220 00:08:54,882 --> 00:08:57,798 Let's give it a chance. - All right. 221 00:08:57,841 --> 00:09:00,017 - Hmm. 222 00:09:00,061 --> 00:09:02,846 I'm feeling lucky. 223 00:09:02,890 --> 00:09:07,590 [wheezing and coughing] - Not today, Jack. 224 00:09:07,634 --> 00:09:10,201 Not in a Best Western. - [exhales] 225 00:09:10,245 --> 00:09:14,031 [coughs] What did the dice say? 226 00:09:14,075 --> 00:09:15,729 - Suck... 227 00:09:15,772 --> 00:09:17,034 Hair. 228 00:09:17,078 --> 00:09:18,601 both: [sigh] Damn it. 229 00:09:21,778 --> 00:09:24,651 - Oh, you made a sandwich just for yourself? 230 00:09:24,694 --> 00:09:26,087 - Oh, I'm sorry. Are you hungry? 231 00:09:26,130 --> 00:09:27,871 - Apparently not. 232 00:09:27,915 --> 00:09:28,829 [doorbell rings] 233 00:09:30,526 --> 00:09:32,746 - Good day, Madam. Is your husband at home? 234 00:09:32,789 --> 00:09:33,747 [laughs] 235 00:09:33,790 --> 00:09:35,879 - Is our marriage a joke to you? 236 00:09:35,923 --> 00:09:37,315 - Uh, no, of course, not Jing. 237 00:09:37,359 --> 00:09:38,621 It's a sacred institution, 238 00:09:38,665 --> 00:09:40,841 and do you want the rest of my Sour Patch Kids? 239 00:09:40,884 --> 00:09:43,670 - Hey, what's up? - You gotta come with us. 240 00:09:43,713 --> 00:09:46,324 We're going to the mall and pantsing all the mannequins. 241 00:09:46,368 --> 00:09:47,891 - It's the crime of the century. 242 00:09:47,935 --> 00:09:48,979 You in? - [sighs] 243 00:09:49,023 --> 00:09:51,634 I would love to, but I gotta stay in with Jing. 244 00:09:51,678 --> 00:09:53,984 - And next time, please call before you come over. 245 00:09:54,028 --> 00:09:56,857 - Will do. Your home is lovely. 246 00:09:56,900 --> 00:09:59,120 - Come on. Wanna cut shapes out of paper? 247 00:09:59,163 --> 00:10:00,861 It'll be so fun. - No, thanks. 248 00:10:00,904 --> 00:10:03,080 You clearly don't wanna be with me on our wedding day. 249 00:10:03,124 --> 00:10:05,256 You'd rather be pulling pants down with your friends. 250 00:10:05,300 --> 00:10:07,258 [phone buzzes] 251 00:10:07,302 --> 00:10:08,695 Who's texting you? - Nobody. 252 00:10:08,738 --> 00:10:10,479 - Let me see your phone. - Can't. 253 00:10:10,522 --> 00:10:12,002 Mom said no screen time after 8:00. 254 00:10:12,046 --> 00:10:13,830 - [grunts] You're still talking to Mia? 255 00:10:13,874 --> 00:10:15,789 Take her out of your phone right now. 256 00:10:15,832 --> 00:10:17,921 - [sighs] I'm not doing this. 257 00:10:17,965 --> 00:10:19,140 - Oh, sure. 258 00:10:19,183 --> 00:10:20,663 Go hide in the basement 259 00:10:20,707 --> 00:10:24,362 because you know I'm afraid the furnace is gonna eat me! 260 00:10:24,406 --> 00:10:25,929 [grunts] - Guys suck. 261 00:10:25,973 --> 00:10:28,802 The greatest bonds in life are between sisters. 262 00:10:28,845 --> 00:10:31,152 Wanna watch "Sister, Sister"? - [groans] 263 00:10:31,195 --> 00:10:33,676 - Ghosted by a five-year-old? 264 00:10:33,720 --> 00:10:36,548 I am tired of this family ignoring me. 265 00:10:36,592 --> 00:10:38,899 I'll give them something to remember. 266 00:10:38,942 --> 00:10:40,901 [snarls] 267 00:10:40,944 --> 00:10:41,771 [murmurs] 268 00:10:43,773 --> 00:10:46,167 [snarling] 269 00:10:46,210 --> 00:10:48,952 - I can't believe those dice were covered with lead paint. 270 00:10:48,996 --> 00:10:50,954 - [sighs] The kids were right, Jack. 271 00:10:50,998 --> 00:10:52,913 Let's go home and watch those half-hour commercials 272 00:10:52,956 --> 00:10:54,349 for old records. 273 00:10:54,392 --> 00:10:56,960 - Yeah, we had a lot of fun when we were dating, 274 00:10:57,004 --> 00:10:58,788 but now we've settled down 275 00:10:58,832 --> 00:11:01,965 and all that's left is to wait for the sweet release of death. 276 00:11:02,009 --> 00:11:03,706 Won't it be nice to not fight it anymore? 277 00:11:03,750 --> 00:11:06,404 - Lost the spark, huh? - Excuse me. 278 00:11:06,448 --> 00:11:09,059 This is none of your business, and also how did you know? 279 00:11:09,103 --> 00:11:10,844 - You're walking like you're holding hands, 280 00:11:10,887 --> 00:11:12,976 but they're not actually touching. 281 00:11:13,020 --> 00:11:15,762 both: Huh. - Follow me. 282 00:11:15,805 --> 00:11:18,721 - I don't know, Jack. This is how cults get you. 283 00:11:18,765 --> 00:11:21,332 - Twice, Annie. Let it go. 284 00:11:23,987 --> 00:11:24,988 - Go on in. 285 00:11:27,034 --> 00:11:28,426 - ♪ It's tricky to rock a rhyme ♪ 286 00:11:28,470 --> 00:11:29,863 ♪ To rock a rhyme that's on time ♪ 287 00:11:29,906 --> 00:11:31,734 - What is this place? 288 00:11:31,778 --> 00:11:35,869 - A private club based on the greatest decade of all time, 289 00:11:35,912 --> 00:11:37,174 the 1980s. 290 00:11:37,218 --> 00:11:39,568 - It's everything we loved in high school. 291 00:11:39,611 --> 00:11:41,744 Bumper pool, "Donkey Kong." 292 00:11:41,788 --> 00:11:43,790 - [gasps] "Top Gun" beach volleyball. 293 00:11:43,833 --> 00:11:46,444 - And a bartender who looks like an angry '80s dad. 294 00:11:46,488 --> 00:11:48,011 - Close that damn door! 295 00:11:48,055 --> 00:11:49,317 We're not heating the whole damn town! 296 00:11:49,360 --> 00:11:52,320 - [laughs] So many memories. 297 00:11:52,363 --> 00:11:54,757 - Ooh, five girls dancing in a circle. 298 00:11:54,801 --> 00:11:58,587 And an '80s cover band with Alf on drums for some reason. 299 00:11:58,630 --> 00:12:00,589 - Middle-aged people of Oakdale, 300 00:12:00,632 --> 00:12:01,982 are you ready to rock? 301 00:12:02,025 --> 00:12:03,244 [cheering] 302 00:12:03,287 --> 00:12:04,549 Two, three, four. 303 00:12:04,593 --> 00:12:05,637 [rock music playing] 304 00:12:05,681 --> 00:12:06,900 - Jell-O shots? 305 00:12:06,943 --> 00:12:07,901 [as Bill Cosby] Jell-O? 306 00:12:07,944 --> 00:12:09,032 Well, I'll drink some Jell-O 307 00:12:09,076 --> 00:12:10,947 with the shaking, and the jiggling, and the-- 308 00:12:10,991 --> 00:12:12,035 [crowd gasps] 309 00:12:12,079 --> 00:12:13,776 You're right. Too soon. 310 00:12:13,820 --> 00:12:15,473 Sorry, everyone. Sorry, Alf. 311 00:12:15,517 --> 00:12:16,953 - It's okay. It's the '80s. 312 00:12:16,997 --> 00:12:19,477 We still love him. Two, three, four. 313 00:12:19,521 --> 00:12:23,003 - Now to make sure my family never forgets me again. 314 00:12:23,046 --> 00:12:25,005 [grunts] - Hey, hey. 315 00:12:25,048 --> 00:12:27,050 - That's it. Cuff me, call my parents. 316 00:12:27,094 --> 00:12:29,357 - No, I just wanna know where you got those tennies. 317 00:12:29,400 --> 00:12:30,662 My daughter wants a pair, 318 00:12:30,706 --> 00:12:32,055 and I want her to know I pay attention. 319 00:12:32,099 --> 00:12:34,797 - [groans] Lady Foot Locker. 320 00:12:34,841 --> 00:12:37,800 [mischievous music] 321 00:12:37,844 --> 00:12:38,845 ♪ 322 00:12:38,888 --> 00:12:40,411 I just shoplifted these earrings. 323 00:12:40,455 --> 00:12:41,848 Aren't you gonna stop me? 324 00:12:41,891 --> 00:12:43,632 - The alarm doesn't detect middle children. 325 00:12:43,675 --> 00:12:45,765 You're free to go. - [groans] 326 00:12:48,028 --> 00:12:50,987 [music box music] 327 00:12:51,031 --> 00:12:53,076 ♪ 328 00:12:53,120 --> 00:12:55,818 - Hey, you dropped your boat. Here you go. 329 00:12:55,862 --> 00:12:58,603 - Come on. Abduct me. 330 00:12:58,647 --> 00:13:00,823 - No, nope. 331 00:13:00,867 --> 00:13:03,043 [both grunting] - Nope, nope! 332 00:13:03,086 --> 00:13:05,523 Help, police. - [sighs] 333 00:13:05,567 --> 00:13:07,003 - Ooh, look at the menu. 334 00:13:07,047 --> 00:13:09,440 They have all of our favorite '80s drinks. 335 00:13:09,484 --> 00:13:13,053 "Between the Sheets," "Sex on the Beach," "Screaming Orgasm." 336 00:13:13,096 --> 00:13:16,708 My God, the '80s were horny. - Hey, you filthy hippie. 337 00:13:16,752 --> 00:13:18,275 I can't wait until the army gets you 338 00:13:18,319 --> 00:13:20,843 and cuts off that long, luscious hair. 339 00:13:20,887 --> 00:13:21,975 What'll it be? 340 00:13:22,018 --> 00:13:24,107 - I'll have a Woo-Woo. - Rum and New Coke. 341 00:13:24,151 --> 00:13:25,892 And can we get those in Gremlins cups? 342 00:13:25,935 --> 00:13:28,895 - Bourbon, four fingers. My size fingers. 343 00:13:28,938 --> 00:13:31,027 - Hey, Alf. Great set, man. 344 00:13:31,071 --> 00:13:34,117 - Yeah, I know. - Wow, never meet your heroes. 345 00:13:34,161 --> 00:13:35,945 - I'm just giving you crap, kid. 346 00:13:35,989 --> 00:13:38,339 Hey, you wanna sit in? - Do I? 347 00:13:38,382 --> 00:13:41,124 ♪ We are strong 348 00:13:41,168 --> 00:13:44,867 ♪ No one can tell us we're wrong ♪ 349 00:13:44,911 --> 00:13:49,132 ♪ Both of us knowing love is a battlefield ♪ 350 00:13:49,176 --> 00:13:52,875 - Whoo! Look, honey, I'm shimmying! 351 00:13:52,919 --> 00:13:54,877 ♪ Love is a battlefield 352 00:13:54,921 --> 00:14:00,752 [vocalizes] 353 00:14:00,796 --> 00:14:02,972 [cheering] 354 00:14:04,147 --> 00:14:06,933 - Please keep your hands on each other at all times 355 00:14:06,976 --> 00:14:08,064 and enjoy the ride. 356 00:14:08,108 --> 00:14:10,240 [both laugh] - Get it? 357 00:14:10,284 --> 00:14:12,329 - Aww, they look happy. - They do. 358 00:14:12,373 --> 00:14:13,374 - Ooh, ah! 359 00:14:21,991 --> 00:14:23,775 - [screams] Who the hell are you? 360 00:14:23,819 --> 00:14:25,038 - Bradley. 361 00:14:25,081 --> 00:14:28,128 - His mom is a therapist, and I think he can help us. 362 00:14:28,171 --> 00:14:30,086 - My play room's next to her office, 363 00:14:30,130 --> 00:14:32,045 and I've picked up a thing or two. 364 00:14:32,088 --> 00:14:35,091 - I'll start. Duncan is ruining our marriage. 365 00:14:35,135 --> 00:14:37,267 - Don't tell me. Tell him. 366 00:14:37,311 --> 00:14:40,270 - You'd rather be with your friends than me, 367 00:14:40,314 --> 00:14:42,969 you get texts from trashy women, 368 00:14:43,012 --> 00:14:46,189 and we never binge "Hector the Detector" anymore. 369 00:14:46,233 --> 00:14:48,975 - Oh, my God--we watched five episodes this morning. 370 00:14:49,018 --> 00:14:51,934 And we're not married. [sighs] 371 00:14:51,978 --> 00:14:54,545 - This really is a kwisis. 372 00:14:54,589 --> 00:14:57,070 Duncan, I'll start with you. 373 00:14:57,113 --> 00:14:59,942 When Jing says things like that, 374 00:14:59,986 --> 00:15:01,770 how does it make you feel? 375 00:15:01,813 --> 00:15:05,165 - I don't know. Sad, I guess. 376 00:15:05,208 --> 00:15:06,949 Sometimes I just look at my life, 377 00:15:06,993 --> 00:15:08,429 and I realize a very im-- 378 00:15:08,472 --> 00:15:12,650 - Okay, Jing. How does that make you fweel? 379 00:15:12,694 --> 00:15:15,131 - Like I'm the only one taking this marriage seriously. 380 00:15:15,175 --> 00:15:17,960 - You are the only one taking it seriously. 381 00:15:18,004 --> 00:15:20,310 It was just a stupid game I played to keep you happy. 382 00:15:20,354 --> 00:15:23,966 - Happy? I haven't been happy in hours! 383 00:15:24,010 --> 00:15:25,837 - [grunts and panting] 384 00:15:25,881 --> 00:15:28,666 - This is very common for the first session, 385 00:15:28,710 --> 00:15:30,668 but thewapy is a journey-- 386 00:15:30,712 --> 00:15:33,106 - Bradley, it's 10:00. Go home. 387 00:15:33,149 --> 00:15:36,718 - [whimpers and sighs] 388 00:15:39,068 --> 00:15:42,550 Be well, Duncan. - [sighs] 389 00:15:42,593 --> 00:15:44,030 [pinball machine pings] 390 00:15:44,073 --> 00:15:45,770 - Come on, Annie. Use your flippers. 391 00:15:45,814 --> 00:15:48,599 Yes, I unlocked Luke and Laura's wedding. 392 00:15:48,643 --> 00:15:49,992 - Hey, babe. 393 00:15:50,036 --> 00:15:53,126 If love is a battlefield, I'd die on your hills any time. 394 00:15:53,169 --> 00:15:54,040 - Excuse me? 395 00:15:54,083 --> 00:15:55,432 - I'm just saying you got a bitching ass 396 00:15:55,476 --> 00:15:57,260 and I'd like to die on it. 397 00:15:57,304 --> 00:15:58,174 - That's a lovely thought, 398 00:15:58,218 --> 00:16:01,569 but you just made a big mistake, mister. 399 00:16:01,612 --> 00:16:03,440 - Wait a minute, I'm confused. 400 00:16:03,484 --> 00:16:05,007 So you're real, 401 00:16:05,051 --> 00:16:08,837 but on the show, you were operated by puppeteers? 402 00:16:08,880 --> 00:16:11,231 - It's all Hollywood magic. [sighs] 403 00:16:11,274 --> 00:16:15,191 Until the magic is gone. I'm dying, Jack. 404 00:16:15,235 --> 00:16:16,888 - Jack, I gotta tell you something 405 00:16:16,932 --> 00:16:18,238 and I don't want you getting upset. 406 00:16:18,281 --> 00:16:20,066 - Honey, Alf just told me he's dy-- 407 00:16:20,109 --> 00:16:22,198 - That guy over there just hit on me. 408 00:16:22,242 --> 00:16:23,721 - Which guy? - That one. 409 00:16:23,765 --> 00:16:25,593 - Oh, he's cute. 410 00:16:25,636 --> 00:16:28,248 My wife. Thank you. 411 00:16:28,291 --> 00:16:31,294 - The Jack I dated would've opened a can of whoop-ass 412 00:16:31,338 --> 00:16:32,600 and knocked him into next Wednesday 413 00:16:32,643 --> 00:16:34,297 because he was cruising for a bruising! 414 00:16:34,341 --> 00:16:37,300 - You want me to punch him? - No, don't be ridiculous. 415 00:16:37,344 --> 00:16:39,476 I just want you to want to punch him. 416 00:16:39,520 --> 00:16:42,740 Like you used to. Oh, it was so hot. 417 00:16:42,784 --> 00:16:43,872 [harp chimes] 418 00:16:43,915 --> 00:16:45,265 - Excuse me. Your shoe's untied. 419 00:16:45,308 --> 00:16:48,311 - Her eyes are up here. - [grunts] 420 00:16:48,355 --> 00:16:51,923 - You're so bad. - And I always will be, baby. 421 00:16:51,967 --> 00:16:52,924 [harp chimes] 422 00:16:52,968 --> 00:16:54,056 It's not the '80s anymore. 423 00:16:54,100 --> 00:16:55,884 I don't have to fight to keep you. 424 00:16:55,927 --> 00:16:58,278 You're not going anywhere. - Oh, yeah? 425 00:16:58,321 --> 00:17:03,109 Well, me and my sexy hills are going home. 426 00:17:03,152 --> 00:17:05,328 - She finally figured out you're a bum. 427 00:17:05,372 --> 00:17:07,765 And I didn't charge you for the Jell-O shots. 428 00:17:07,809 --> 00:17:09,071 - [whimpers] 429 00:17:09,115 --> 00:17:11,334 - I know my appointment's not for a month. 430 00:17:11,378 --> 00:17:13,336 I need to see you now. 431 00:17:13,380 --> 00:17:15,338 - And so I didn't punch the guy, 432 00:17:15,382 --> 00:17:17,340 and now your mom and I aren't speaking. 433 00:17:17,384 --> 00:17:19,516 - Oh, things are tough with me and Jing too. 434 00:17:19,560 --> 00:17:22,128 I feel like I can't do anything right, you know? 435 00:17:22,171 --> 00:17:24,260 If I make her a sandwich, there's too much jelly, 436 00:17:24,304 --> 00:17:26,349 and then if I take some of the jelly off, 437 00:17:26,393 --> 00:17:27,524 there's not enough jelly. 438 00:17:27,568 --> 00:17:30,440 - Yeah, marriage is complicated, Dunker. 439 00:17:30,484 --> 00:17:34,096 - Yeah, but mine's weird because my wife is my sister. 440 00:17:34,140 --> 00:17:35,532 - Yeah, I got no advice for that. 441 00:17:35,576 --> 00:17:38,231 - [sighs] I didn't want your dad to punch him. 442 00:17:38,274 --> 00:17:39,797 I just--I got caught up in the past, 443 00:17:39,841 --> 00:17:42,322 and I wanted to know he still cares about me enough 444 00:17:42,365 --> 00:17:43,323 to deck someone. 445 00:17:43,366 --> 00:17:45,716 - And I don't wanna yell at Duncan. 446 00:17:45,760 --> 00:17:48,154 I'm just not good at putting the jelly on. 447 00:17:48,197 --> 00:17:49,546 - I don't know. 448 00:17:49,590 --> 00:17:51,244 Would it have killed me to just shove the guy? 449 00:17:51,287 --> 00:17:52,810 She would've done the same for me. 450 00:17:52,854 --> 00:17:55,465 - And I guess I shouldn't expect Jing to be more mature. 451 00:17:55,509 --> 00:17:59,121 She's only, like, four or five. How old is she again? 452 00:17:59,165 --> 00:18:01,123 - Four--no, five. Definitely five. 453 00:18:01,167 --> 00:18:04,561 Absolutely four--she's five. 454 00:18:04,605 --> 00:18:06,824 Great, now I'm a terrible husband and father. 455 00:18:06,868 --> 00:18:09,175 - You're not a terrible husband. 456 00:18:10,219 --> 00:18:11,220 [door slams loudly] 457 00:18:12,395 --> 00:18:15,268 - [screams] 458 00:18:16,225 --> 00:18:18,706 - Jack, were you screaming? - I must have been. 459 00:18:18,749 --> 00:18:21,187 - It was me. I'm right here. 460 00:18:21,230 --> 00:18:25,016 I'm tired of being ignored. I need my negative attention. 461 00:18:25,060 --> 00:18:27,149 So whatever your marriage problems are, 462 00:18:27,193 --> 00:18:28,411 work them out 463 00:18:28,455 --> 00:18:30,370 'cause I am this close to joining one of dad's cults. 464 00:18:30,413 --> 00:18:33,155 - Let it go. Come on, Annie. 465 00:18:33,199 --> 00:18:35,723 We're going back to that club, and I'm defending your honor. 466 00:18:35,766 --> 00:18:37,333 - Oh, Jack, I don't want you getting 467 00:18:37,377 --> 00:18:40,249 into a sweaty 1980s rumble 468 00:18:40,293 --> 00:18:43,426 just so I can live out some sort of "Road House" fantasy. 469 00:18:43,470 --> 00:18:45,036 Duncan, watch your sister. I'll drive. 470 00:18:48,257 --> 00:18:51,391 - Hey. - Hey. 471 00:18:51,434 --> 00:18:55,438 You look well. - So what have you been up to? 472 00:18:55,482 --> 00:18:58,441 - Learning to read and playing Legos. 473 00:18:58,485 --> 00:19:00,313 - Well, you were always good at that. 474 00:19:00,356 --> 00:19:02,967 Look, I think we're better as brother and sister. 475 00:19:03,011 --> 00:19:05,666 - Maybe we were just too young for marriage. 476 00:19:05,709 --> 00:19:08,364 - Yeah. You want a PB&J? 477 00:19:08,408 --> 00:19:10,236 I'll nail the right amount of jelly. 478 00:19:10,279 --> 00:19:11,889 - I'd like that. 479 00:19:11,933 --> 00:19:15,458 - Hey, my day was weird too. Pennywise is real! 480 00:19:15,502 --> 00:19:18,461 - Hey, kid. I feel bad about before. 481 00:19:18,505 --> 00:19:19,680 Come on. I'll abduct you. 482 00:19:19,723 --> 00:19:21,377 - Forget it. You had your chance. 483 00:19:21,421 --> 00:19:23,466 - [screams] 484 00:19:23,510 --> 00:19:25,033 - Hey, pal. 485 00:19:25,076 --> 00:19:27,818 The only guys who talk about my wife's hills 486 00:19:27,862 --> 00:19:30,386 are me and her primary care physician! 487 00:19:30,430 --> 00:19:31,909 - Hey. There you are. 488 00:19:31,953 --> 00:19:34,260 I am so sorry about what happened earlier. 489 00:19:34,303 --> 00:19:36,044 It was wrong, and after some thinking, 490 00:19:36,087 --> 00:19:38,264 I realized it came from my own insecurities. 491 00:19:38,307 --> 00:19:40,222 I hope you can forgive me. 492 00:19:40,266 --> 00:19:43,094 - Oh, of course I can. That's all I needed to... 493 00:19:43,138 --> 00:19:45,271 - [vocalizes] - I'm so sorry! 494 00:19:45,314 --> 00:19:47,925 [gasping] 495 00:19:47,969 --> 00:19:51,102 [all growling] - Are we sure we wanna do this? 496 00:19:51,146 --> 00:19:52,843 - [sighs] Not really. 497 00:19:52,887 --> 00:19:54,454 - But we have to. 498 00:19:54,497 --> 00:19:57,196 [all exclaiming weakly] 499 00:20:09,991 --> 00:20:11,688 - [screams] - Ow. 500 00:20:11,732 --> 00:20:15,475 - I am so sorry that I pushed you into whatever that was. 501 00:20:15,518 --> 00:20:18,434 - Actually, it felt good to mix it up with the boys again. 502 00:20:18,478 --> 00:20:20,610 Plus I wanted to show you I still love you. 503 00:20:20,654 --> 00:20:23,874 - Oh, I like the way you show your love for me now. 504 00:20:23,918 --> 00:20:26,616 Changing the air filters, washing my car for me, 505 00:20:26,660 --> 00:20:29,532 siding with me when I vent about coworkers, 506 00:20:29,576 --> 00:20:30,490 even when I'm in the wrong. 507 00:20:30,533 --> 00:20:33,057 - Well, you do lots of stuff for me, too. 508 00:20:33,101 --> 00:20:34,276 You open all the jars, 509 00:20:34,320 --> 00:20:36,452 do the talking during parent-teacher conferences, 510 00:20:36,496 --> 00:20:38,280 and you let me know if I'm watching a movie 511 00:20:38,324 --> 00:20:39,368 I've already seen. 512 00:20:39,412 --> 00:20:42,328 - Oh, Jackie. Happy anniversary. 513 00:20:46,549 --> 00:20:49,509 [kissing] 514 00:20:49,552 --> 00:20:51,554 - They're gonna be all right. 515 00:20:52,947 --> 00:20:55,558 - Is that guy watching us? 516 00:20:55,602 --> 00:20:56,994 - Who cares? Nibble my hair. 517 00:20:57,038 --> 00:20:58,039 Mm. 518 00:21:01,956 --> 00:21:04,001 - Hey, Alf. How you been, man? 519 00:21:04,045 --> 00:21:05,438 - Feeling great. 520 00:21:05,481 --> 00:21:07,309 I'm doing this new holistic thing. 521 00:21:07,353 --> 00:21:09,746 I cut out dairy, patched things up with my son. 522 00:21:09,790 --> 00:21:11,531 - Well, that's great. Where you headed? 523 00:21:11,574 --> 00:21:12,793 - Tucson. 524 00:21:12,836 --> 00:21:15,143 Music's fun, but I need a steadier gig. 525 00:21:15,186 --> 00:21:18,189 My brother-in-law got me a job refilling vending machines. 526 00:21:18,233 --> 00:21:20,453 They let me keep all the broken cigarettes. 527 00:21:20,496 --> 00:21:22,411 - That is awesome. You've earned it. 528 00:21:22,455 --> 00:21:23,586 [cats meowing] 529 00:21:23,630 --> 00:21:25,501 Oh, you still... 530 00:21:25,545 --> 00:21:28,330 - Yup, old habits. Take care, brother. 531 00:21:30,245 --> 00:21:32,508 ♪ Love is a battlefield 532 00:21:39,559 --> 00:21:41,474 -Yaah!-ANNOUNCER: Welcome to the world of Duncanville. 38776

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