Original subtitles

[jazz music]

Did you have a trip planned sweetheart?

No, not exactly

We have talked about this Claire.

When?

When did we talk about this?

Where are you going?

We've been over this.

I'm done,

I'm moving out.

What?! Right now?

You can't leave, we are in therapy for God sake!

Just like you wanted.

People don't change Claire, not unless they have to.

I have to, you dont.

I'm growing, you're not.

Of course I'm not growing, I'm a size two!

You don't listen Claire, you don't see me.

You've created this alternate reality that I am not a part of.

Ever since you got back from that retreat

You've been acting strange

Chester.

Chester!

Where will you go?

I'm staying with Deborah

Deborah?

Are you on something?

She has a guest house

So that's what this is about? Deborah? Tree hugging

granola grandma?

She is my friend.

I'm your friend sweetheart!

I'm sorry Claire I didn't want it to end this way.

Well you're not taking the Jag, or the BMW

Or the other BMW

Or the Landy or the Camero or the Benz.

You'll be back when you realize what you're missing!

Chester,

Chester!

What?

She is picking you up?! Are you kidding me?

Trunk!

She is picking you up?!

Who are you?

-Back off Claire! -What have you done to him?

-Do not touch my car! -Who are you people?

Touch the car? God, a homeless person wouldn't crap

in this thing!

Claire screams

[Deborah] Get in the car Chester

Claire screams

[Chester] Not the gnome!

Not the gnome!

[Claire] You bastard!

-Go go go go -Get in, get in.

[Deborah] Get in the car!

[Chester] Wait wait wait wait

Claire cries

[Claire] I'm going to kill you!

I'm going to come after you!

[Chester] Peace out!

You bastard!

[Deborah] Of course homeless crap in the car. They do it

all the time.

Sometimes tough love is the only way.

She has got this ridiculous thing about control

And gnomes!

And gnomes! She killed the fuck out of my gnome!

She is like a terrorist you know? All that violence.

Wow, I am learning so much from you.

it's such a turn on.

Hey, words are sacred, just say what you want!

Just ask the Universe!

God, I really want...

Yes

I really, really want.

To be free!

How free?

Free bird fucking free!

Free as the wind blows.

Free at last, free at last high-golly mighty free at last.

Like that black radical guy in the 60's.

Martin Luther King!

No! Not the boxing promoter.

No, no thats Don King. MLK is the civil rights activist.

Larry King! Love Larry King.

God! I mean those suspenders.

How cool is that guy?

Where is Dad going? And who is Deborah?

He's uh

We're-

Did he just leave you?

No!

He is just taking a little break

It was kinda my idea.

Oh, you're idea? Really? Okay.

Wait! was that Deborah the cashier from Pavillions?

Claire sighs

Um I think they're-

Having sex?

No, God no.

Yeah that's it just pretend it's not happening.

Did you smell her?

Hippies have that smell! You know?

Mom! That's messed up.

But it's true!

Okay, its a lifestyle.

I mean that's how you know they're hippies.

And you know your father and his aversion to smells.

He'll be back by the weekend.

Okay, we will see how that goes.

Yes we will.

Yes we can!

Don't ever say that in this house.

[Chanting music]

[Glass clinks]

Thank you

What is that music?

How's life in virtual reality?

Don't be a wise ass.

Nobody likes a cocky Jesus.

This is a state of the art VR guided meditation and-

What is that music?

What is it guiding you towards Ms. Claire?

Peace, peace of mind my little latin companion.

Serenity

Will you turn that shit off?!

[Loud chanting music]

Oh, hey.

That music, my God what is that?

Pranic Shama, it's supposed to help center me.

How does anything that shreaky center you?

Sounds like you're strangling squirrels in there.

Really? Cause it was kinda working until...

You know...

Now.

Are you all right?

Yeah, I'm fine.

Well maybe try some jazz

Thank you, Claire.

For what?

You know, letting me stay here.

Your mother was a very dear friend and I loved her

very much.

And I know that you had your differences but-

Yeah poor mom, and I'm sorry about you know

I heard about your husband shacking up with that

hottie cashier.

Hot?

She's not hot.

Not hot, no, no, no.

I'm the hot one.

That's got to really suck big dicks.

Yeah... and I'm so glad you haven't lost all

your teeth yet.

You know, a lot of meth heads lose their teeth, somtimes a

year after they stop.

Oh no, really?

Google it.

Attitude is everything, and dinner is at 7.

You need to eat you skinny little creature.

Bitch.

Little bitch.

[Phone vibrates]

[Phone rings]

Oh! Hey!

I'm confused, I thought we were still considering dates

for Cheyenne's lunch.

Um, yeah... uh

Wait did Carla put this together?

Yeah, honey you knew that.

No, I don't think so.

Come on.

Well she didn't invite me.

Oh no honey I'm sure she did.

Yeah, she is a little piece of work isn't she?

Just come anyway!

No, I'm busy.

Well we are going to see you on the 12th

that's your big night, the fundraiser right?

You're having Arnold the Govern-ator.

You've got Deven the RNC poster boy coming-

Wow! Nice.

I'll see you at Susan's, Suzanne's

[Aime] You better be there.

Okay by!

[Aime] You're coming!

Did you just get punked?

Never!

Have you heard from Dad?

Who?

I almost forgot.

No.

But I'm sure he's suffering.

Well you're going to fix this right?

I mean, you fix everything.

I don't know if I can.

Why not?

Well, your father has changed baby.

Changed? How?

You know who Charles Manson is right?

Yeah...

Well not exactly like that, but

Deborah isn't just a hippie cashier.

I think he may have fallen in with one of those cults.

No, I had no idea.

I don't think he is in any immediate danger, but

we may have to extract him at some point.

Oh my God, poor Daddy.

I know, well you know what they say.

There is a little Charles Manson in all of us.

No one says that.

Well we will carry on. You know what they say,

success is the best revenge.

Yeah, they also say that those who seek revenge

should dig two graves.

Okay that's creepy.

Love you!

[Heather] Love you!

Dolphine awards,

Community service, who the hell are these people?

Oh look it's the libtard playbook.

Unbelievable

You know what? You're a plug!

[Radio] You are creating your reality.

[Radio] In every moment.

[Radio] Close your eyes and imagine what you want your life

[Radio] to look like.

[Radio] Have you ever come so close to failure that you-

[Claire] Just breathe. Just breathe.

[Trump Radio] No collusion. Which I knew anyway, no

[Trump Radio] coordination, no nothing. It's a witch hunt

[Trump Radio] thats all it is.

[Trump Radio]There was no collusion, with Russia.

[Trump Radio] If you can believe this one.

[Trump Radio] She probably can't believe it. Who can?

But the report was very powerful very strong-

[Claire] Just breathe.

[Chester] It just runs right through you .

There I was, price checking a can of beans, right?

And suddenly, I have this thought, sometimes you have

to price check yourself.

I mean, what is value even, right?

Wow, have you ever thought about a book?

That is so simple, so powerful!

Oh, and I've been meaning to ask you.

What is that scent you're wearing? It is intoxicating.

You like it?

I love it! It's like a fucking Viagra drip!

Let's get some more at Vitamin Barn.

Oh yeah!

That would be great.

[Claire] Hey!

Why are you dressed like that?!

You don't get to control him any more it's not cool!

You don't get to talk to me.

You are a rat bastard Chester!

And you! You are the rat bastard's concubine!

Claire screams

[Chester] Thank you so much for letting me stay here.

[Deborah] No Problem.

I left a little honey on the counter.

from my beehives.

Wow, I didn't know you were a bee keeper?

Well, we all have to do our part don't we Chester?

I mean, the bees are dying and once they're gone

It's just gonna be sayonara for all of us, right?

The bees are not dying Deb that's wacko lefty science B.S.

No, no, that's a fact.

That's why all the bamboo is gone.

That's why all the dolphins are committing suicide.

What? Dolphins committing-

That is not an alternative fact Chester, that's real.

Well, here is a fact.

Honey is an aphrodisiac.

Well, maybe I shouldn't have left it for you then.

Or...

Maybe we go back and get some more of your secret

scent

come back here and I drizzle honey all over you.

And then, you can be my little honey button, hippie

hottie, sex kitty!

Oh, you are so wound up aren't you?

Fuck yeah, I am super wound up.

It feels like steel down there.

I think I could crack a walnut with it.

Oh, I like that.

Why is PCH always gridlocked?

Here is an idea, If you are coming from the valley

You are not allowed to use Topanga as a short cut.

Use to be a time it'd take 10 minutes to

get from Malibu to Santa Monica.

But now all this riffraff just dumps onto the coast highway

every morning.

Jesus, what do I have to do to get a cup of coffee

around here?

Just ask.

Thank you, Jesus.

It's Jesús.

That's it!

I will run for office on installing a toll road on PCH.

The city will make a fortune and it will improve drive time.

Who wouldn't vote for that?

Probably all the riffraff trying to get to work in

Santa Monica.

Have you heard of this Run For Something organization?

Well we, are running for something.

Are you sure you're not running from something?

Just think of it, Claire Vangaurd, Mayor of Malibu.

Well, it's a start, isn't it?

In my country politicians are currupt liars.

That's how it is here too.

Isn't it exciting?

Who would have thought that I, would end up aspiring to

become a public servant.

You will be a natural politician.

Oh! Well thank you, my first endorsement.

And I believe, in equality for everyone,

at the top.

♪