Original subtitles

Previously on Why Women Kill:

- Hello. - Sheila Mosconi.

It was lovely to meet you.

Rob kissed a blonde waitress.

Not Rob. Not after what happened to our daughter.

Beth Ann, confront the girl.

She might not know that Rob is married.

Can I get you some coffee to start?

You look like you could use someone to talk to, and we're slow right now.

- What is your name? - Sheila.

- Tommy. What's this? - I don't know.

It was here when I came in.

Is he the only one or have there been others?

Here's what's going to happen. You will go upstairs to begin packing.

You won't come down until everyone's gone, understand?

I will not be humiliated.

What did you do?

You think you're gonna get out of this by dying? Fuck you!

- Tommy. - I've wanted to do that since I was 13.

- Well, how old are you now? - I'm 18.

I think you should go.

Hello? Hey, what's up? What!

- Who was that? - My friend Jade, she has this crazy ex.

- Oh. You fucking her? - Don't be mad.

- About what? - Jade's outside.

You've become emotionally involved.

That is an insult to me and the sacred institution known as open marriage.

- Fine, one night. - I told her she could stay the weekend.

Hey. Thank you so much for letting me stay.

I really, really appreciate it.

Oh, my gosh!

This is crazy.

I can't believe this, I'm staying with the guy who wrote my favorite movie.

If Jade needed to stay here a couple extra weeks, it's no problem.

When I was a child, I lived next door to a nice married couple.

They seemed very much in love.

Until the night someone heard gunshots.

And the police were called.

They said one of those nice people had been murdered.

I asked my mother how something like that could happen.

All she said was: "Marriage is harder than it looks."

Years later, a rich couple moved into that same house.

I always thought they seemed happy...

until the police came back.

And I saw the body.

The rumor was one of the rich people had killed the other.

I asked my fiancée what she thought had happened.

All she said was: "Death is cheaper than divorce."

Last year, yet another couple came to live in the house next door.

They were young and seemed to have so much to live for.

But sadly, I heard the sirens one more time.

I arrived at the crime scene to have my worst fears confirmed.

I turned to my wife and said: "Another love story has ended in murder.

I can't believe it."

My wife looked at me and said: "I can."

That looks delicious.

You know, you're starting to become one of my regulars.

- What is this, your second time this week? - My third.

I'm afraid I don't have much to occupy my days

being a lonely widow in a new town.

Sheila, you never told me that your husband died. I'm so sorry.

Don't be. It happens.

Do you have a fella?

- Well, I... - Of course you do, you're so pretty.

What's his name?

Rob.

Tell me about him.

I can't.

Not here, it's kind of a complicated situation.

I understand.

Understand what?

Clearly you're dating a married man.

How did you know that?

You used the word complicated, what else could it mean?

Oh, um, please don't tell anyone. I'm not proud of it.

Of course you're not.

- Don't worry. I can keep a secret. - Thank you.

I do have one question.

Has your married man ever told you why he feels the need to cheat?

Uh... What?

My husband had an affair but he died before I could find out why.

Naturally, I'm curious.

I'm sure it was a completely different situation.

Or maybe it was exactly the same, who knows?

- Has Rob said anything? - Not really, no.

I assume it's just the obvious. You know, he's bored with his wife.

- Bored? - Check please?

You know how housewives can be.

They forget that their husbands need more than hot meals and clean socks.

Men want excitement and passion.

Lots of women just forget to put in that kind of an effort.

They don't change their hair. They always wear the same dowdy clothes.

- Can I get you anything else? - No.

You've already given me more than enough to chew on.

Oh, hello.

- How long have you been here? - About an hour or so.

How are you feeling?

You know, it's funny.

You, uh... You attempt suicide with a bottle of sleeping pills,

and when you finally wake up, they sedate you.

God. What were you thinking?

Look, I was ashamed of the pain I'd caused.

- And your death would cause me less pain? - It was stupid and selfish. I'm sorry.

Well, just tell me you won't try it again.

- I won't. - Say it.

I won't try and kill myself again.

Good.

The doctors say you can go home this afternoon.

Well, that's your call, not theirs.

Can I come home?

I've thought about it, I still want a divorce.

But there's no need to rush things.

You can stay at the house. And then after a while, we'll separate.

Amicably. Charmingly.

Charmingly?

I want people to envy our divorce the same way they envied our marriage.

Oh, God forbid our friends should ever pity you.

Our friends don't feel pity, only schadenfreude.

And when would we separate?

Oh, sometime in July.

Oh, after your daughter's wedding?

We've been planning all year to make sure every detail is perfect.

And why upstage her?

Exactly. You love Amy as much as I do.

You wouldn't want to ruin her special day with a divorce.

- No. - Or a scandal.

- Of course not. - Or suicide.

Oh, for God's sake, Simone.

Sorry, darling.

But with what I've spent on this wedding I had to make sure.

Guys, you don't need to wait on me.

No, no, no, you are our guest.

And you're recovering from a traumatic event.

I'm not worried about Duke anymore.

He's stopped texting me.

- So what's his deal? Is he crazy? - A little.

He was always accusing me of cheating on him.

Of course I was, but I would've appreciated a little trust.

Did Duke know about you two?

Sure, yeah, mostly because of how we met.

Okay. Come on. How did you meet?

You never told him the story?

Well, we don't usually share stories about our playmates.

Share. Just this once.

Okay.

I was selling lingerie at Agent Provocateur.

Solid opening scene. Go on.

- Well, I was there to buy a few bras... - Red lace?

- No. The kind I like. - Well...

So I was in the fitting room taking my top off

- when the zipper gets caught in my hair. - So she sticks her head out

and is all, "Can you come in here for a sec?"

What are you doing?

- Nothing. - You had your eyes closed.

- Yeah, I'm just trying to picture it. - Don't, it's pervy.

Okay. So what happened after you helped my wife out of her sweater?

- He asked in a non-pervy way. - We did it.

Right there in the fitting room.

Sex in a fitting room? Bravo. That was just bravo.

And I'm so gonna close my eyes later.

Anyway, that was six months ago and we're still together.

- Six months? - Yeah.

Uh, you told me that you met Jade just a few weeks ago?

I'm pretty sure I said months.

No. No. You absolutely did not.

Well, obviously I made a mistake.

Who wants dessert? I got fortune cookies.

Actually, I was hoping we could jump in the hot tub.

- Were you? - If it's okay with you guys.

- I don't know. - Yeah, you know what?

I'm not really in the mood for cookies.

Why don't I run down to that pie shop we like?

Pick us up some pecan,

you guys get in the hot tub, have a nice little soak until I get back.

That sounds amazing.

- Doesn't it sound amazing? - Yeah, you don't mind?

Not at all.

Honey, I'm home.

Where are you?

I'm right here, darling.

I've missed you.

Is dinner ready?

Not yet.

I've had a hell of a day.

I'm gonna go fix myself a drink.

Let me know when food's on the table.

- So you had a rough day? - The worst.

My best engineer quit today.

My secretary called in sick.

And on top of all that, I took my boss's briefcase home by mistake.

I hope your day was better than mine.

Well, now that you ask, I had a lovely day.

Yes.

I bought a new dress.

- Did you? - Yeah.

- Is that the dress? - It is.

- What do you think? - It's nice.

Just nice?

It cost a whole week's allowance.

Why would you spend that much on a dress?

I wanted to look pretty for you.

Oh, well, thanks.

- What's wrong? - I don't understand.

It has been years since I bought a new dress and I got my nails done

and I got a new hairdo. How could you not notice?

Oh, I'm gonna be honest. I never notice stuff like that.

Why not?

Because when I look at you, I don't see clothes or hair.

I just see you, the girl I married.

Is that so?

Yeah. I don't expect you to be chic or stylish.

You're my wife.

I just need you to be the same old Beth.

What the hell?

If you're not going to notice what I'm wearing,

why should I bother to wear anything at all?

- Honey... - You want to see the same old Beth?

Fine. Here she is in all her glory.

Honey!

Why is your boss here?

He probably came to get his briefcase.

Could you give me a moment before you open the door?

Definitely.

Simone!

I would prefer you call me Mrs. Grove, at least in public.

You got it, Mrs. Grove.

My mom asked me to bring you these muffins.

- Oh, that was nice of her. - Yeah. Not really.

She just wanted me to find out what happened to Mr. Grove.

- You know what happened. - And I'm not telling her.

So I guess it's kind of a waste of muffins.

But I can still carry them in the house for you if you'd like.

No, thank you.

Come on, Simone.

Tommy. That kiss we shared was sweet, but it was not a down payment.

Look, if you don't find me attractive, then just say so.

I find you alarmingly attractive.

But there are other considerations.

- Like what? - Your mother is my best friend.

So?

So it would be an absolute betrayal to sleep with her child.

I'm not a child.

I've grown up and I've learned some things,

like, how to take care of a woman's needs.

Just give me a chance to show you the man that I've become.

That was a lovely speech, Tommy.

Next time try it without the skateboard.

God, isn't this magical?

Well, it's certainly nice.

Nice?

You have no idea the kinds of places I grew up in.

When I was a kid, I thought that houses like this only existed on TV.

You never talk about your childhood.

Yeah. Yeah. That's because it was shitty.

It was just bouncing between foster homes

with parents who only saw me as another check from the government.

But you make me feel like I'm worth something.

So yeah, that's really magical.

- I guess it is. It is. - Yeah. It is.

Guys? Oh, oh, that's hot.

- Eli? - It's so funny.

I was on my way to the bakery

and I remembered we still have that pie in the fridge.

- I'm so dumb. - You're also naked. Why?

Am I the only one?

Oh, gosh, that's awkward.

Well, of course, there are two ways to fix this situation.

- I could put on a suit or... - Inside.

- What? - Inside, now.

- There we go. Steady. - Use my arm.

It's very kind of you to help me like this.

- Oh, here, sit. - Oh, oh, dear. Hang on.

Oh, there we are.

So, um, shall we begin?

- Begin what? - The conversation.

You must have questions for me.

When did I know I was gay? How many men have I been with?

Karl, please. I just had lunch.

- You're not curious? - Not in the slightest.

And if this arrangement is going to work,

you can't bring up topics that will upset me.

We need to talk about this if we're to have any sort of rapprochement.

- What do you mean? - We've been married 10 years, Simone.

You can't say we haven't been happy.

No. I can't.

I'm glad you know the truth.

Now we can deal with it, come to some sort of understanding...

and maybe we could be happy again.

Darling, I'm not ready to discuss this yet.

I've moved your things into the guest room.

I don't want anyone to know that we're staying in separate beds,

especially not my daughter.

I understand.

Where are you going?

Oh, I felt a little chilly.

I wanted to get my cashmere throw.

Oh, well, I'll get it for you. Sit down.

- Thank you. - Don't be silly.

You're very kind, darling.

You son of a bitch!

All right, um, if you'll just let me explain.

Shut up. I'm counting pills.

Well, I admit I may, I may have dropped a few.

There are over 40 pills here.

You said you swallowed the whole bottle. How many did you really take?

- Two, three? - They pumped my stomach.

I'm not paying for that. Not when a good burp would've saved you!

And where is your cane?

Shit.

Please understand. I was trying to prove I love you.

By faking a suicide attempt?

You don't respond to small gestures!

I'm going to work out. If you and your things are not out

of this house by the time I get home, I will call the police.

Where am I supposed to go?

I don't care!

Well, maybe I'll go to Naomi's.

Yes. She has a guest room.

Maybe she'll ply me with liquor and get me to spill all my lurid secrets.

And why would you do that? You're the one who kept your sex life hidden.

I was married.

If you kick me to the curb, I'll have no reason not to come out.

And then you, my love, will be another Grace Belknap.

Remember Grace?

Are you threatening me?

Yes. Her husband ran off with a carpenter, I believe.

Oh, your friends were so catty.

For God's sake, Karl!

But you were the cruelest of all, Simone.

"Oh, poor Grace!

I suppose her carpenter wasn't the only one with a stud finder!"

Well, I imagine those women would relish the poetic justice

if you wound up in the same boat.

Why are you doing this?

I am fighting for our future happiness.

By blackmailing me?

Well, like I said, you don't respond to small gestures.

- What do you think you're doing? - What do you mean?

You own swim trunks, Eli, multiple pairs.

So why did Jade and I just get a face full of ass?

- Well... - I'll tell you why.

You thought if you left Jade and I alone to get comfortable,

we'd get a little loose, a little frisky.

And then you could just slide right in, the three of us would fuck the night away.

That may have been on my wish list, yes.

Solid plan, not gonna happen.

Okay. Okay.

But what if it did? I mean, think about it.

We like sex with each other. We like sex with hot women.

One of the reasons we work as a couple. We got so much in common.

That's fine for us, but what about Jade?

- Oh, I'm pretty sure she's into me. - What? Why?

The other day, she was going on and on about how much she liked my movie.

I liked The Shining. That doesn't mean I wanna fuck Stephen King.

Okay. All right.

Well, if you're not sure that she'd be into it, ask her.

No. It'd be weird.

Weird how?

Like, I don't know if she's that adventurous.

She fucked you in a fitting room!

Okay. It would be weird for us.

- We've never done this before. - No. It doesn't have to be a big deal.

No. We've, we've already got an open marriage.

Why can't it be open to Jade?

Fine.

I'll ask her for a three-way.

- Will that shut you up? - I think you know it will.

- Okay. But we won't pressure her. - No, no, no.

I will take her aside, I will ask respectfully, and if she says no...

She says yes.

Are you two coming or what?

His boss saw your tits?

- Don't make it sound worse than it was. - I'm not sure I could.

I was so angry.

I changed my whole look, Rob did not even notice.

Here's my two cents, all right? Spend them wisely.

Rob isn't cheating on you

because you don't wear the latest styles from Paris.

What do you mean?

Ma! Mikey hit me.

What am I? Your bodyguard? Hit him back!

So what I mean is, how is your love life?

Are you doing everything you can to keep him interested?

- Sheila! - Sometimes old dogs need new tricks.

New tricks?

I was a virgin on my wedding night.

I only know what Rob was willing to teach me.

There's a book that you should read.

- What is this? - It's a manual, for married couples.

These are dirty pictures!

They're illustrations. They're scientific.

Why do you have this?

There was a time that Leo and I felt our love life needed a little zing.

And do you actually do these things?

You see page 76?

- Yes. - That's how we got Benny.

- Oh, dear. - Yeah. That's not for beginners.

Let's go back a few chapters.

Ah! That's a classic.

We like to do that in the shower.

You've done that to Leo?

That's how I got my Pontiac.

And you really think Rob will like these things?

I do.

And I won't feel humiliated after?

Sex is how women gain power over men.

And there is nothing humiliating about that.

Jumping jacks!

Two, three, four, five, six, seven, eight!

Simone, I've never seen you work out so fiercely.

I began to wonder if maybe you're upset about something.

Not at all.

Just burning off the muffins you sent.

- So Karl's home? - Yes.

- And everything's fine? - Yes.

Why do you ask?

It's just Wanda left the most cryptic message on my answering machine,

before she left for rehab.

She intimated that you and Karl were having some sort of marital problems.

Oh, we're fine, Naomi.

- Now, if you'll excuse me. - Simone, please.

You don't have to pretend.

Not with me. I wasn't surprised.

I've known for some time about Karl's indiscretions.

I don't know what you've heard.

I didn't hear. I saw with my own eyes.

What exactly did you see?

Well, I was picking up my dry cleaning one day,

and there was his car, parked across the street at some seedy motel.

- So you know everything? - I do.

I mean, I couldn't tell you who the woman was, but...

The woman?

I wanted to catch him in the act, but I couldn't just stand there,

waiting for him and his floozy to come out.

So you have no idea who he was with?

No.

- Do you? - Oh, Naomi.

I really do have to go.

The important thing is, is that you finally know the truth.

Finally?

How long ago did this happen?

I don't know. Year ago? Maybe two?

You knew my husband was cheating for two years, and you said nothing?

Wives always say they'd wanna know if their husbands were cheating,

but they never forgive the person who tells them.

But you're my best friend!

And you're one of mine.

I'm so glad we had this talk.

- Do you still wanna make love to me? - Yeah.

- I'm free today at 4:00. - Great.

- Where should we go? - You're a man now. Figure it out.

Hi, there. You're home early.

I have a business dinner.

I wanted to come home and shower first.

Another business dinner?

You've had a lot of those lately.

Sorry, honey. Duty calls.

Before we get in there, you got any Jade tips for me?

You know, do's and don'ts. Stuff she likes, stuff she doesn't?

You know that thing you do to me? With your tongue?

- The circle thing? Yeah. - Yeah.

Don't do that.

- You don't think she'd like that? Why not? - No. Because I've never liked it.

Copy that. Good tip.

Honey, what are you doing?

What is this?

I want to try something I read in a book.

I think you'll like it.

- Beth Ann? - Shh.

I have to concentrate.

- Hold still. - Beth Ann?

Oh, my God.

- Seriously, honey. That kind of hurts. - I'll go slower.

You really don't have to.

Oh, dear.

Oh, my God.

I can't believe that just happened.

Well, it did.

I must have done something really good in a past life,

like, like, maybe I was Jesus or... or that guy that cured polio.

What was his name?

Oh, yeah.

Yeah. That's right.

It's all about you guys, now.

So what can I do to help?

I'm open to suggestions.

Hello?

Hey, babe, can you just give us a minute here?

Yeah. We're both very, very close.

Oh, yeah. Yeah, yeah. Sure. I'm hungry.

Are you guys hungry?

I'm gonna get some pie.

Yeah.

Simone.

Hello, Tommy.

- You look nice. - Thank you.

I have the catering van all afternoon.

Oh, clever idea, switching cars.

Where are we going?

What do you mean, "Where are we going?" We're here.

You can't be serious. You wanna make love to me in a catering van?

The futon is brand new, and so are the sheets.

Well, technically, they're tablecloths.

There's no way I'm getting into your mobile sex den.

- For God's sake! - Then come inside. Come on!

So? What do you think?

Do you like the candle? It's sandalwood.

All I can smell is pastrami.

Oh, yeah. We catered a bris yesterday.

- I can't do this. - Wait!

I even got us music.

I don't care if you hired the Budapest String Quartet,

I'm not fucking you in a van.

Look. I know you were probably hoping for a nice hotel, but I can't afford that.

- I'm sorry. - Don't be.

I needed to remember this is a bad idea, thank you.

Wait, wait. So you're just leaving?

You've always been a good kid and you're becoming a good... friend,

but let's not let a silly impulse ruin that, okay?

- Okay. Goodbye. - Goodbye.

- What will you tell the doctor? - The truth.

I was cut to shreds moments after my wife turned into a French whore.

Oh, there's no need to be rude.

I'll be more pleasant once I've stopped bleeding profusely.

For God's sake, what were you thinking?

I wanted to surprise you.

Well, next time bake a cake.

I got the idea from a sex manual.

It said men like that sort of thing.

Well, men on shore leave perhaps, not me.

- Well, I had to do something. - Why?

I feel you pulling away from me.

- That's not true. - It is.

- No. - It absolutely is.

It's work. I've been preoccupied.

No. It's more than that.

You're unhappy.

I see it.

Every day.

You get up, you go to work, you come home,

you eat dinner, you put on a smile for my benefit and then you go to sleep.

That's what your life is...

and it's empty...

because of what we've suffered.

Please don't talk about that.

We've tried not talking about it and it doesn't help.

You're drowning in the routine of your existence.

I know because I'm drowning alongside you.

But maybe if we help each other...

we can survive.

I wish I was a better man.

You are a fine man.

I've made choices I'm not proud of.

Like what?

Mr. Stanton, the doctor will see you now.

Oh, okay.

- I'll be back soon. - Rob.

I'm glad we had this little talk.

I feel better.

That was fun, huh?

I mean, I knew sex was cool because I'm not a virgin

but my limited experience with the girls on the drill team

did not prepare me for that.

Simone?

Hey, are you okay?

Yes.

Are you sure? Because you seem upset.

No.

I now realized what I've been missing for...

God, such a very long time.

- So you and Mr. Grove never... - Not for years.

I told myself "It's marriage, passion fades,

that's what happens when you get old."

You're not old.

You're a goddess.

Well, the temple's been closed for quite some time.

But thank you for reminding me that I'm still alive.

- You wanna do it again? - Yes.

- What day is good for you? - No, I meant now.

Now? You can go again already?

Ah, youth.

Eli?

In here.

I got to hand it to you, babe, that was some kind of fun.

Oh, I'm so glad we went there.

It was absolutely wow.

Yeah.

That's it?

Hey, you don't get a lot of I-told-you-so's with me, babe,

don't waste this one.

- What's wrong? - Nothing.

- Are you sulking? - Nope.

Then what's up?

Because you don't look like a man who just had his dream fulfilled.

- I need to ask you something. - Okay.

Are you in love with her?

I knew it.

Six months, that should've been my first clue.

I think you're jumping to conclusions here.

- I saw the way that you looked at her. - When?

I was there in the doorway.

You two were holding each other,

and I can't remember the last time you looked at me like that.

Honey.

This isn't about me, this is about you.

Don't do that.

You've been insecure lately because of your career.

Are you in love with her?

No.

Really? Because...

that look.

Look, I'll admit, she's more than just another hook up,

and I should've told you about her a long time ago.

But my love story is with you.

And it always will be.

Okay?

I guess I have been feeling a little insecure lately.

Yeah.

- When you guys didn't come downstairs. - I'm sorry about that.

Truly.

Are we good?

Yeah, we're good.

Hey, I thought we were having pie?

Yes, we are. We are.

- Great. - Just don't expect ice cream

unless you guys like it drinkable.

Well, hello.

Where have you been?

You committed adultery, Karl,

that means you're no longer entitled to keep tabs on my life.

Fair enough.

- Did you go to the gym? - Why?

Well, I don't know, you seem, uh, energized.

Do I?

Yes, have you embarked on a new exercise regimen?

As a matter of fact I have.

And I plan on working out as often as I can.

Well, I should get going.

Going?

To my dinner meeting.

You've just gotten back from the hospital.

I feel fine.

Surely whomever you're meeting with has already left.

I called the restaurant, they're still there.

Rob, please don't go.

Honey.

This has been an awkward night.

I really do think you and I need some time together.

I need to make an appearance.

They must be important clients.

Very important.

Don't wait up.