Original subtitles

Oh, oh, what is so heart-rending?

Chase!

That was amazing!

Your Sherlock has got...

...mopped the camera, baby.

Why would you do this to me?

I had fun with you yesterday too, yeah I know, I know, Larry did

too.

I had fun

with you

too, yeah I know, I know, I know, I know, I know, I know, I know, I

I'm gonna die.

I'm gonna fucking die.

Fuck!

Fuck!

I'm gonna fucking die.

I'm gonna die!

Fuck!

Fuck!

Ah!

Ah!

This.

This is a hundred thousand times more powerful than the computer that was on board the space shuttle that flew to the fucking moon and we're all just walking around with one of

these in our fucking back pockets yeah it's neat neat neat neat is a dog that knows how to

skateboard that's neat this this is the fucking beast to the knees my man it's stolen Duke our

phones can do what TV shows and movies used to dream up we can open an app type in some words and it'll spit out something

indistinguishable from real life we can turn words into pictures we can turn words into voices we can turn words into videos

we can do that now said we all can well fucking nerds now the

the wind flows have become the Urkels and while people might pretend like they care if something's showing up they don't give a fuck if it's plausible

enough they'll believe it especially especially if deep down if deep down they want to believe it fucking forget

about it man people are easy to manipulate and let me tell you said manipulating them has never been

easier and it's never been more fun I'm gonna ask you a really boring question but you

gotta promise not to think I'm a boring person yeah how do you like driving an electric car lovely smooth ride plug it in and on think

about it what do you drive well when my car isn't in the shop it's an old piece of shit Chevelle Chevelle car piece of shit it's cool

as hell oh yeah well mine's a piece of shit the clutch keeps going out on me and the brakes are shit it's a 72 stick shift not look

at you that's how my daddy taught me never figure it out but you look fucking cool driving it

what's your name you saw my name when I booked the ride it's poppy oh hey you don't believe me you calling me a liar Tim

so it's really poppy like that's your bird's name since the day I escaped June's hoo-ha so you're telling me your name is

poppy and you're sitting back there sucking on a lollipop I'm telling you my name is poppy and I'm sitting back here sucking on a lollipop all right

cool I dig it I like your accent yeah yeah

I like your face is that right it ain't wrong so where are you from

Chevrolet Texas outside he's Tim from Texas so what you doing after you drop me off Texas Tim I guess I'll

head back and hope someone else needs to do the same thing lollipoppy no you're hanging out with me and my friends

oh am I I think my husband's gonna like husband you didn't say nothing about a husband

well guess what Texas Tim you're in luck cuz my husband likes to watch likes to watch

he likes to watch he just likes to watch oh yeah and I think he's gonna

really like watching you fuck me is that right it ain't wrong cute

yes I am yes you are yes you are wait

so what did you do last night what do you mean I just told you well tell me again Jason what were you doing the last five minutes that I was talking

maybe you are the one with ADHD and maybe your story is boring see if it was so boring and why don't you want to hear it again

but I mean why do you think it's called ADHD are there any variations of it what

ADHD was it discovered in the 80s or in Seattle snow be serious see I can't I'm not okay you fucking

with me or you just fucking retarded oh I'm being a serious ADHD not a zero KD attention deficit hyperactivity disorder okay

dumbass Dago's

I'm not

a citizen it's complicated let's talk about it no well if

you drink no fuck you I'm doing this make myself a drink this fucking guy poppy

chase random guy names Tim this is Texas Tim Tim's good all right welcome to a rental abode I'm chase

that greasy go over there's the letter you know not you you ciao so nice to meet you does he know you're married

she's married he knows does banks know about him he does he'll be here soon thanks come yeah you knew this

I did you did oh cool cool it's the letter did you know banks was coming yes

yes oh cool cool is that what I think it is

it's perfect attention to detail guys the better markings the direction of the grain

is impeccable what are you all going on about this is an original Clinto Binto replica of the shield of Sadanki

it's a manga cosplaying ecology basically Clinto Binto turns fantasy into reality his work is unmatched when it comes to

authentic cosplay designs y'all do like dress up as superheroes not exactly how we put it but yeah something like that all right I'm gonna go put my stuff away and

tingle Bellissimo

Sandor what the hell is this great question I was hoping that you could shed some light on that we all know there's only

two things that pop is good at doing no being a picture-looking British the filters and the fillers

they do all the heavy lifting no yikes that's not very nice okay this is not real where did you get that it was sent to me

by who it doesn't matter yes it does no it doesn't what matters is why the fuck would you say that about me I did it poppy this is not funny come on I'm not laughing

poppy this is crazy fuck you do not fucking come on poppy come on this is obviously not real please it's

not obviously not really poppy somebody's fucking with me we say in the videos face it's manipulated look

I'm not saying you're lying but I mean that's you so it looks like me yeah but it's not it's not maybe it is a day they fuck my mother

I do not know they fucked you know they start to eat my mouth now you said oh they fucked

with my mouth this is not real I do not know what else to say I've already said enough let's see to chase just say you

said okay I'm also just the same just the same fuck you Jason Wow apologize

yeah shut the fuck up Jason apologize

thanks I did not I said apologize do you even know what we're talking about yes dear shit she sent me the video

now apologize I'm a Jesus sorry

no not to Jesus to poppy I'm sorry poppy

let's move on it's just bumming me out why did you just apologize what

why'd you apologize for something you didn't do what what you said you didn't do it then you

apologize for it yeah because because I do not feel like dealing with your shit okay it's fine

thanks it's fine he said he's sorry exactly he said he's sorry for something he said he didn't do I'm the only one that finds out a

lot you're the only one who won't let it go I'm sorry who the fuck are you no apology needed names Tim thank you

bear this is Texas Tim this is who I was texting you about he's joining us tonight lovely guess I'm the

guy who's gonna fuck your wife in front of you okay cowboy saddle the machismo y'all came here to have a good time right the dude said some stupid

said he's sorry and your girl's good to move on so quit peeling around thanks

hey water under the bridge yeah I just want to get past the bullshit have a good time is all that's we

don't smoke but thanks you from Scotland no

you got family out there no there's that part of your cosplay get up yeah time

to get in the time machine coming that's the plan ain't it hello

hot dog maybe later hi I ain't your papa

so what's the consensus do we believe him Otto

well we'd never actually say that about me he actually be that be firm say worse

not about you in general he tries to be Swiss but it can be quite the Machiavelli in Monterey

what do

you mind yes I fucking mind it's not your hot tub this is our hot tub I think it is come

on pal don't make it a thing with all due respect pal suck a smegma smothered dick

god damn

it fine fuck you guys hey I

plan on coming back and using this so don't contaminate it yes okay chase I need what

oh I didn't say anything but you want to I see your stupid thing little nits we bring to talk well you know you did boycott

her birthday huh Bobby's birthday you refused to go no I did not refuse to go I was working could have got it all no I couldn't so

because I refused to go to her birthday because I could not make it you think I was actually talking shit even though even though I was the one who recently helped to pick up a new t-ball

the letter you're doing a gesture of momentary kindness does not mean that you did not vocally defecate on her I helped my Jerry Asher neighbor bring in her

groceries the other day despite the fact that every morning I created the gods for her to choke on her Werther's original sounds like you're

projecting oh it does is that what it sounds like yes it does it's clearly is something that you do it so you're accusing me of doing the same oh is that what I'm doing chase keep

responding with a question all you want that does not change the fact that you're gonna drop that's the America you can go pack the right offer oh

yeah he's watching that's the deal yeah but what would you expect he doing working on a stand-up you

don't think that's weird it's what we do it be weird if I thought it was weird look at

me he's watching you not the other way around here's the thing my dog chase let it go it

just seems like a convenient alibi fuck this I'm gonna go take a shit love me a good protest shit

salute no

no I know it you're a special kind of beautiful

but that's it I don't know what it is could have been something it was definitely something ah

we're a different kind of breathe

yes

you are have fun with that I

don't know I'm just trying to help I was just trying to stop James wait y'all know let's go yeah

James where's they did this James where is she?

Is she okay?

They did this!

It's not my fault!

It's not my fault!

They did this!

Hey!

Hey!

Hey!

James!

James!

James!

James!

James!

James!

James!

James!

James!

James!

Poppy I need to see the phone Sasha

what the fuck we have to call the cops Okay but just Poppy they will send me back They will send me back they will not let me stay You need to fucking understand

Can we please get the same picture from Tennessee before we call them What do you mean?

We have to tell them exactly what happened No!

We have to!

No!

Papi, give me the phone!

Papi!

Get off me!

Papi, give me the phone!

No, Papi, me favor!

Give me the phone!

Give me the phone!

Give me the phone, Papi!

What the fuck, Papi?

Give me the phone, Papi!

Give me the phone!

Oh!

What the fuck happened?

She's leaked!

What?

She's leaked!

Oh, shit!

Call 911, quick!

Hey, Papi, hang in there!

Hang in there, hey!

Hey!

Hang in there!

Call 911, quick!

Papi, hey!

Hey!

Papi!

Papi!

Call 911!

Hey!

Hey!

Hey!

What the fuck are you doing?

I was trying to get the phone from her but she kept on phoning and she's leaked!

Hey, hey, hey!

Listen to me, you fuck!

We got a dead body in here and we got another one outside.

You are the fucking common denominator!

Do not fucking move!

No, hang on, hang on!

I fucking...

Wait, hold on, hold on!

No phone!

And no my phone either!

You lost your mind?

And no fucking phone!

Are you fucking kidding me right now?

No!

Get off of me!

Get off of me!

You don't understand!

Max is fucking psycho!

I'm pissed off on that!

No, no, no!

I'm talking about Back to the Future!

He's a psycho!

I'm talking about Back to the Future!

But do we need psycho?

He's gonna try to kill me!

Probably both of us!

You don't believe me?

He's already killed someone.

What?

They wrote that they're self-defense but they're sycophants and we're burning hospitals and I'm trying to raise them!

God, so?

What the fuck is your business?

You know how there are some people that you just know are capable of murder and it only takes about one moment for them to snap?

You!

God, so we have to get out, okay?

That guy's got PCP ranging through him!

It's all not that well for us!

I'm talking about PCP.

What do you think he meant by that, Linda?

I don't know!

I thought he just said, all greedy heads in the room!

In the age of that, you fucking idiot!

We have to get out of here right now!

Trust me on this!

I don't trust you!

I don't want to know your jolly beliefs!

Huh?

Huh?

Oh my God!

You're fucking dead!

I'm gonna find you!

You can't hide from me!

What?

How?

Now how do you?

I'm getting the fuck out of here!

I'm stuck here!

You threw my phone!

What?

You threw my phone!

You threw my phone!

That's the key to my car!

What do you mean?

You don't have a key?

No!

Why not?

You have a keycard or something too?

I don't have it on me!

Why not?

Because I wasn't planning on someone throwing my fucking phone!

That's why!

Hey, where's your car?

I did not drive!

I rode with Chase!

Okay, where's Chase's car?

In the garage!

I had to throw my phone!

Oh, found it!

Mine!

Give it to me.

Unlock it.

Go.

What's my phone doing out there?

He found it.

He's watching us.

Oh, God, I don't like that.

Where are you?

Where are you, you son of a bitch?

Hey!

Hey!

What's going on here?

Trying to scare us?

Mission accomplished.

You trying to do something else?

This is fucking crazy, pal!

What's crazy...

...is that Poppy and Chase are both dead.

Banks...

Banks, please.

I mean, it was an accident.

I was just trying to...

...to stop James, and then Poppy and I were arguing over a dimple, and she's asleep.

Please!

Maybe she's asleep.

Maybe you're a fucking liar.

She's dead because of you.

Maybe I'm going to enjoy killing you both for it.

Okay, good talk.

Oh, my God.

What do I do now?

What do I do?

What do I do now?

Leave me alone!

Oh, shit!

I don't know.

Okay, maybe we should just go.

No!

Oh, God.

Oh!

No!

No!

It was...

...awesome. - It's a whole different ballgame when you see it in person, right?

Holy shit.

Holy shit!

Clint!

Oh, Clint-o-pinto.

Clint-o-pinto.

I'm at a loss for words.

I...

You have to make my soup and my gear, man.

You fucking have to.

Oh, my God.

There's just...

You just gotta work with me on the price here, man.

Oh, come on.

It's a little high, don't you think?

Breast tax.

You know why you're here?

I'll tell you why you're here.

I shouldn't have to.

You know why you're here, but I'll tell you anyway.

You don't want to just cosplay.

You want to be the character.

Yes, you do.

Yes, you do.

I do.

That's why you're here.

Not for some bullshit foam detail.

Not for a crushed pan cloak.

I don't fuck with crushed pan.

If the character's weapons cut, shoot, spin...

...they'll do exactly that.

If the design features wood, you're gonna get genuine grain.

If a look calls for metal...

...well...

...consider me Hadfield.

Because your ass is getting fucking metal.

I'll forge it, roll it, extrude it.

My shit is the real deal, bucko.

You ain't tiptoeing past TSA with a pinto in your baggage.

But I don't make shit for the masses.

I make shit for the coveted affairs...

...that you wish you got invited to.

Well, you finally did get invited to.

And when you walk in...

...looking like you just went toe-to-toe with Goku in 8K...

...everyone is gonna want to suck your dick so bad...

...that you're gonna want to suck my dick so bad.

Clint!

Yes, Abby?

We can talk about this.

Don't say shit like that, you're creeping him out.

No, I'm not.

Am I?

You're not.

I am not.

He's just saying that.

Are you just saying that?

No, I'm not just saying that.

He is not just saying that.

Okay, why would he say he's just saying that?

He just said he is not.

No, dummy.

If he was just saying that...

...why would he admit to just saying that...

...when you ask him if he's just saying that?

Yeah, just...

...please stop telling people they're gonna want to blow you.

Ev, I am simply illustrating the fact...

...that my level of devotion to the craft...

...will lead to a certain level of appreciation on his part.

Well, say that...

...you goddamn weirdo.

I am so sorry.

He's the best, you know.

Whatever you're gonna have him cook up for you...

...it's gonna be super nummy.

I'm off to the shop.

Don't forget to change the battery.

Careful there.

That's one of the strongest adhesives on the market.

Instant bond.

You get that on your skin, you are going to regret it.

Okay, so...

...my price is my price.

And it needs to be paid up front...

...and in full.

You'll get your shit...

...six to eight months after my phone goes cha-cha.

Six to eight months?

The House of Binto has a bill on your wait list.

The thing is, I kinda don't...

...have the money...

...right now, anymore.

Um, but I'm gonna get it.

You send, I start.

I'm gonna get you your money.

You gotta believe me, I'm gonna get it for you, I swear.

Stop telling me what I gotta do.

Look, I want you looking as fly...

...as gold bloom on a Sunday afternoon.

But I gotta get paid.

I gotta.

I gotta.

Fuck you, man!

Fuck you!

You fucking dick!

You little fucking figure!

Fuck you, man!

I gotta get something off my chest.

What is up with people not putting...

...shopping carts back where they belong?

I just got back from the grocery store...

...and there were carts...

...and the cheaping...

...and the decent...

...but your carpet's still in...

...and it's rightful destination...

...invested within me.

Banks are a scam...

...that the government...

...has tricked you...

...into...

...trusting. That's why...

...I took all of my money...

...out of the bank.

I gotta get something off my chest.

Banks are a scam...

...that the government...

...has tricked you...

...into trusting.

Did you know that they could...

...freeze...

...and seize...

...your money...

...at their own will?

That's why...

...I took all of my money...

...out of the bank.

Why would I want to risk...

...letting them steal...

...hundreds of thousands of dollars...

...of my money...

...when I know...

...it's safe right here...

...in the house of Bento?

Fuck.

Said.

Amen.

Where were you yesterday?

Hello?

I don't know.

You don't know where you were.

I...

Hello?

Hello?

Just...

I was just dealing with some shit.

You're always dealing...

...with some shit, Duke.

I'm sick of your excuses.

I want...

...my money.

Hello?

Yeah, yeah, okay.

Yeah, said.

Got it.

Okay.

Then when am I getting it?

Hello?

Hello?

Hello?

I don't know.

Soon.

Okay, listen.

I gotta go.

Fuck you.

And the bulb didn't shatter?

Nope.

How'd you get it out?

That's a story for a different time, my friend.

I can help you.

I'll get a...

...large cold brew...

...and, um...

Huh?

Yes, a blueberry muffin.

One large cold brew and a blueberry muffin.

That'll be...

...10.89. Just gonna ask you a quick question.

Huh?

Why don't you enlighten me...

...on what that...

...quick question...

...is? Right there on the screen.

Yes.

It is.

Isn't that...

Let me get this straight.

You want a tip for...

...what? Filling my cup up with coffee?

For doing the correct mix-in ratio?

Or, uh...

...handing me a fucking muffin?

You want the tip for doing the basic requirements of your job?

Look, man.

I didn't come up with this system, okay?

Yeah, well, you're more than happy to benefit from it, aren't ya?

Yeah.

You know, what you do here is no different than what they do at Taco Bell.

But you don't...

You don't throw in an extra Washington when they're...

...whippin' up your Crunchwrap Supreme, do ya?

No.

You don't.

But you expect me to do just that...

...for you.

Everything good here, Wayne?

Yeah, man, it's cool.

Look.

We don't get paid enough here, but...

...whatever. You don't have to tip, alright?

Oh, I'm well aware of that, Wayne.

What I'd like to know is why you think it's okay to guilt me into paying you extra...

...instead of getting mad at me for your pay shortcomings...

...why don't you get mad at your employer?

They have somehow successfully Kaiser-Sose-ed all of you...

...into thinking that it's the customer's job to pick up the fucking slack.

Dude.

There's a line form behind you.

I need to help the next customer.

Sorry.

I just had to get this off my chest.

I feel you.

Don't get me wrong.

I'm gonna tip, cause I don't wanna be shamed.

But it's fucking stupid.

It is fucking stupid.

Everyone now has the gall to spin that fucking screen around.

You know, you're not even finished with the transaction...

...and you're already asking for a bonus.

It's bullshit like this that's gonna make us all not give a fuck...

...when your job is replaced by robots.

No shame.

No shame.

Fuck's sake, dude, it's like two bucks.

See?

This is what they want.

They're turning us against each other so they can get away with it.

They?

There's no big conspiracy of they trying to get your tip money.

There might be.

There just fucking might be.

Hi.

I am so sorry you had to deal with that.

I'm very happy to tip.

My point is you shouldn't be guilty to doing it.

Dude.

Country grammar?

Zip it.

Your turn's over.

Okay, can I just get a medium flat white?

Yeah, that'll be...

...5.59. Thanks.

Here you go.

Hey, dude.

What's up, man?

Hey, Franco.

So what's on the docket today?

Lazzy.

Here you go.

Thank you.

Yeah, I see where you're coming from with that, man.

And there's a lot of people that would agree with you.

Yeah.

Thank you.

Thank you.

Hey, Laz.

Hey.

Don't have to ask me twice.

Thank you.

It is the season, huh?

I gotta get me some caramel delights.

What's caramel delight?

Delights?

You've never had them?

With the caramel drizzle and the coconut shavings?

They are the duck's quack.

You mean Samoans.

You mean Samoas.

And they're not called that anymore.

They changed the name.

They're not changed.

What are you talking about they changed the name?

I just bought a box last week.

Of caramel delights?

Of Samoas.

No, you didn't.

You didn't buy Samoas last?

Couldn't have.

You couldn't have.

I was in Whittier last week.

What were you doing in Whittier?

Visiting David Shade.

Oh, I hate David Shade.

We all do.

So, before I headed back home, I stopped at a Ralph's.

And on my way out, there was this cute little Asian girl with the chubbiest cheeks and one little dimple.

And she was sitting at a table surrounded by cookie goodness.

So, I handed her my money.

And you know what she did?

I'll tell you what she did.

She handed me a box of Benedicts and a box of Samoas.

And that purple box of Samoas is currently relaxing on my kitchen smarts countertop with about, oh, four cookies left for consumption.

Okay, well did you look at the label on the box?

Does it actually say Samoas or do you just think it says Samoas?

Can I bet?

You know, I bet, Liza, you didn't pay attention.

In fact, I'm certain of it.

Well, you're certainly wrong.

It doesn't say Samoas because it can't say Samoas because Samoas don't exist.

You know what you do have?

Caramel delights.

And those delights are delish.

Someone's a confident putt today.

Lazarus Beeler.

Find everything you needed?

Alright, that's gonna be $43.57. There

you go.

Have a nice day.

What was her deal?

I don't know.

We're just not much of a talker.

You know, that's a great movie.

Django Unchained.

It's one of my faves.

Okay.

What, you don't agree?

No, totally.

It's top tier.

I just cleared out this guy's movie collection at a yard sale.

Got me some tasty fives, Ev.

Tasty fives.

Yeah, you like to have the actual media, huh?

I am a-okay with streaming.

Gave me that sweet, sweet convenience, baby.

Yeah.

But when you got the physical thing, they can't fuck with it.

Alright, Neil deGrasse Tyson.

Much as I love being here when I don't have to be, I'm going to head out.

I bid you adieu.

I'm out.

Alright, thank you.

Have a good night.

I'll see you soon.

You think you people can just come around here and do whatever you want?

Hi, Ty.

Do I have to tell you that you don't belong here?

You fucking slack.

What the fuck?

I'm going to call the police.

You fucking evil nigger.

I'm going to call the police.

Holy shit.

Holy shit.

Oh my god.

Oh my god.

Oh my god.

Holy shit.

Get out of here.

Get out of here.

You don't belong here.

Oh my god.

Oh my god.

Fuck.

Hi, Freaks.

I'm sorry I missed you.

Fuck.

Fuck.

Fuck.

Fuck.

Fuck!

What the fuck?

I'm freaking out.

I don't know what to do.

This is Focker.

It's fake, right?

Evie.

Yes, of course it is.

I have no idea what's going on.

Wait.

When you say Jango is one of your favorite movies, can you please elaborate?

Evie, now is not the time.

Oh no, lads.

Do you root for Leo?

Evie, that's not fucking funny.

Okay, okay.

You're right.

Oh my god.

How many people have seen this?

Dude, internet sleuths are going to blow my shit up.

Don't stress.

It's not real, right?

So everything's going to be fine.

Come over tomorrow and we'll figure it out.

Dealer.

Dealer.

Okay.

I'm going to close up shop and see you tomorrow.

Sounds good.

Okay.

Don't stress.

Okay.

Bye.

Bye, babe.

Fuck.

Fuck.

Hello?

Hello, is someone here?

Oh, shit.

Oh, I'm so sorry.

God, you scared the fuck out of me.

Oh, okay.

That is an employee's only bathroom.

Oh, I'm sorry.

I just, I was going to piss myself.

Well, I basically did with this whole episode.

Wait, have we met before?

You look real familiar.

Oh, were you at Jay's party?

I'm Nick.

Are you okay?

Look, we're closed.

What?

You have to leave.

The fuck?

You have to leave.

We are closed.

You have to leave.

I'm sorry, aren't you open for like another hour or something?

I'm just freaking out right now.

And I just have to close up the shop and you have to leave.

Um, okay.

Okay.

Have a good night.

Yeah, thank you.

You too.

Bitch, I was not being sincere.

June!

June.

It was June!

It was June!

Okay, it's okay.

It was June!

It was June!

911, what's your emergency?

Hi, yeah, um, uh, there's a man, there's a man outside my store and he's stalking me.

Okay, ma'am, calm down.

Is he threatening you?

Yeah, he, he yelled at me.

What did he yell?

He said it was, it was you.

Okay, do you know what he meant by that?

Do you know this man?

What's he doing now?

Oh, I don't know him.

He's, he's standing there staring at me.

Staring at you?

Yes, he's staring at me.

He's really fucking creepy.

Can you please just send someone?

Ma'am, calm down.

Why do you keep saying that?

Ma'am, you need to calm down.

It's not illegal to stare at someone.

This isn't just some innocuous stare.

Do you not understand that I'm scared?

I understand.

No, I don't think you understand.

There's a man standing outside and I think he wants to kill me.

Why do you think that?

Okay, well, the thing is...

I'm sorry?

Look, there's a video of me saying the N-word a bunch of times online.

And I'm scared that he probably saw it and that he wants to hurt me or kill me.

But it's not real, okay?

I didn't say it.

It's not me.

Well, it was me, but it wasn't actually me.

So there's a video of you saying the N-word.

And you're calling the police because a black man is looking at you and it's making you nervous.

I know it sounds bad, but he also yelled at me.

And it was really scary.

Can you please just send someone?

He's...

Ma'am?

Hello?

Look.

Ma'am?

Where'd you go?

Where'd you go?

I'm right here, ma'am.

No.

He's gone.

The man's gone?

Maybe.

I don't know.

I don't see him.

He must be hiding somewhere.

Okay.

Well, if he comes back and actually threatens you, give us a call back.

What do you mean?

You're not going to send someone?

Ma'am, calm down.

The situation is not an emergency.

I can transfer you to the local station if you'd like to make a report.

And you can call back if he returns and threatens you.

Are you fucking serious?

I'll be dead by then.

Ma'am, I'm transferring your call.

Have a good night.

God damn it!

What the fuck?

Hey, are you okay?

Oh my God, it's the man!

Um...

It's rising in!

It's rising up in the fire apartment!

That's, uh, that's pretty fucked up, Duke.

Heh, yeah.

Uh, let's see.

I already showed you this dick.

Uh, let me see.

Oh, here, look at this, Duke.

Okay.

She does porno?

Nope.

This is a clip from Put It Where It Doesn't Belong, starring Charity Sins.

I swapped Charity's face for hers, and then one of her friends' face for the dude porkin' her.

Sent it to her boyfriend.

What's she doing?

Nothin'.

Nothin'?

Mm-mm.

I don't even know her.

You don't know her?

Nope.

No, she's just fuckin' annoying.

Her and her friends are just, like, bleh.

Always on the...

on the internet, you know?

In a few days, I'll probably send an update of her cry, because her boyfriend dumped her, and, you know, she tries to make everything a thing.

In the wrong hands, this technology can get kinda ruthless.

And that's the thing, Sid.

It's already in the wrong hands, because it's in our hands.

Whew.

Reality's about to get really confusing.

Uh-huh.

Yeah.

Okay, um, if I could just correct course as to why I'm even here.

I'm assuming, once again, I'm not looking at a fat envelope on this tiny table, because...

Pachanga.

Fuckin' Pachanga.

Fuckin' Pachanga.

You know, I shouldn't have watched Passenger 57 so many times beforehand.

Fuckin' roulette.

I call my money.

Typical mama.

But see, that's where I was going with all this, Sid.

We can use this to get your money back.

Let me show you.

Look, you can record your own video.

You can upload one from the internet.

And then, if you press this to analyze the voice.

Now, you can record your own voice, or you can just write some things on here.

And, you know, it'll analyze the text for you.

If you wanna change somebody's face, all you have to do is add one photo here.

One photo.

That's all it fuckin' takes.

And then it analyzes it.

Boom.

Oh.

Boom.

See what I mean?

Fuckin' easy peasy to fuck with people.

Just think about how easy it'll be to scam them or extort them into them giving you all their money.

Shit, man.

With this technology, I mean, you could make someone disappear without somebody even noticing until it's way too late.

Knees to the fuckin' knees, man.

I'm telling you.

Oh.

Oh.

Oh.

Oh.

That shit's fuckin' strong.

Oh.

Oh.

Fuck.

You know, the neat part about this is that...

Franco predicted you'd come around.

What?

Oh, oh, listen, listen.

Who the fuck is Franco?

Why are you talking to him about me?

No, man.

No, no, no.

It's not what you...

No.

Ced, listen.

Just listen to me.

I can explain.

The fuck is...

Ced, just relax.

Does he have my money?

Does he have my fucking money?

Does he?

Does he?

Does he?

Pay me the fuck back.

Oh, fuck, man.

What the fuck, man?

Oh.

What the fuck, man?

Ced.

Ced.

Ced.

I'm gonna get your money, man.

I'm gonna get your money, man.

I'm gonna get your money.

He's a scarecrow.

Oh, my God.

Randy, that's the rumor.

Everything good?

Huh?

Hospital.

Oh.

I was just visiting with someone.

They're okay?

Somehow.

Yes.

Thankfully.

You doing alright?

Feeling a little yucky, actually.

Yucky, huh?

Yucca Valley?

Where's that?

The desert.

Near Joshua Tree.

Well, shit.

Yucky girl in the back and yucca girl up next.

What do you think?

Should I take it?

Probably a good payday.

Yeah.

Fuck me.

That's stupid far.

Kinda weird though, right?

Like, yucky and yucca.

Yeah.

Could be a sign.

Could be meant to be.

Could be.

Could be a mistake.

Alfred's gonna be a bitch.

Use the money, though.

Hey, Duke.

What's going on, man?

Fuckin' Fredo.

So, you looking just for chadrons or something in particular I can help you out with?

Yeah.

Uh...

Can you...

help me figure out how to use an app?

Yeah, of course I can, man.

I can't deal with all this shit, man.

So, I'm going on an extended vacation.

I can't deal with all this shit, man.

So, I'm going on an extended vacation.

Guess I'm a nerd now, Duke.

You do anything productive while you're out there?

I got some cherries.

The fruit?

The bombs.

They still make those?

Been eaten out of the border, yes.

Wanna blow it up?

Now?

Here?

What are you, 12 years old?

Making things go boom is fun.

Yeah, right.

Fuck yeah!

Ha ha ha ha.

Sure that wig is long enough?

Do not disrespect Renito's craftsmanship.

Hello?

Hey, babe.

I need your help this time.

Oh, hey, babe.

What number are you calling me from?

Uh, my phone died, so I'm calling from a friend's.

I'm trying to get through our instance at the shop, but things don't log in.

Why not just do it when you get back?

I need to take care of something real quick.

Hey.

Okay, to log in, you get our email, smokiesabandonedatgmail.com.

You get the password, and it's our YouTube password.

Uh, pop, pop, out.

One, uh, an exclamation point.

You have to capitalize the O.

That's it.

Yeah, I forgot to capitalize the O, but that's just amazing.

Okay, I gotta go, babe.

I'll see you later.

Bye.

Mm-hmm.

Hey, babe.

How you doing?

Oh, no.

Come here.

It's gonna be okay.

Why don't you ring the bell at Finn's home?

I did.

Nothing happened.

Oh, my God.

You didn't change the battery.

No, it's okay.

Just press FAC-282 on the keypad.

What are you dummies doing?

It was Charlie's idea.

Hey, Abby.

It was the last one.

No, no.

What are you, 12 years old?

Snazzy-lazzy!

Staying up trouble, chompy?

Trying.

Go back.

You can use a hug.

Come here.

Do you realize how obnoxious this is?

Babe, I tried telling him, but he wouldn't listen.

How dare you?

You okay?

Oh, boy.

I saw this, like, chicken and rice.

It has to be online, then I kind of want to try it.

Ev, I can't find that gargantua glue.

Did you put it somewhere?

I did not.

Did you change the battery on the doorbell camera?

I did not.

You're on a roll, babe.

I'll roll your face.

Oh, yeah?

You know what I'm going to do to yours?

What's that?

This.

And this.

And this.

Now put your shit away.

It's like make dinner.

Buzz, we're going to find out who did this to you, and we're going to end their very existence.

Don't you worry.

You talk to the cops?

Yeah, I kind of had to.

What happened is...

No!

How's that guy doing?

Surprisingly all right.

All things considered, thank goodness.

Ooh.

What?

Nadia?

El bejo.

I'm going to make water.

Gross.

On that note, I'm going to get more wine.

You want some?

Babe, I would love some.

Buzz, what's wrong?

Babe?

What the fuck?

Who's out there?

Charlie, get in here!

There's no one there.

It's probably just some homeless person cracked out on something.

Our neighbors had a similar situation recently.

It's okay, babe.

It's nothing to worry about.

What's with the yelling?

What happened?

Somebody tried to get in the house.

What?

Uh, Charlie?

I think you tried to DM a bit of your baloney pony to some dude and accidentally posted it.

He just wrote a golden ticket to Charlie in the fuck factory.

Enjoy your stay.

That's on my profile right now?

What the fuck?

Wow.

Charlie, were you wanking it in our bathroom?

Don't wank it in our bathroom, Charlie.

I must have been...

I must have been acting...

That is obviously a deep fake.

That's not me.

Oh, you have something you want to say, Loss?

Perhaps the N-word, if you were tech?

Wow.

Way to pulse a quave.

Nice try, Loss.

Oh, I see.

Okay, so you want everyone to believe that you weren't hilly-hold-rookin' around town, but you don't believe me.

I don't understand what's the big deal, anyway.

Aren't you guys always passing your dicks around to each other?

Your dad follows my account, Bingo.

Charlie, that's my bathroom.

It does kind of look like it.

No, no, it doesn't look like it.

It is it.

And you're wearing the same outfit.

If this is not a coincidence, will you stop looking at that, please?

I thought it was fake.

It is.

I believe you, Charlie.

Thank you.

I mean, you wouldn't want to make a mockery of what's happening to me, would you?

Of course not.

It's gotta be fake.

Your dick isn't actually that misshaped, right?

I mean, obviously somebody used some A.I. hocus-pocus and put your face on some other guy's body with a weird-shaped wiener, right,

Charlie?

Right.

And he's giving you shit, Charlie Z.

It's a delightful dong.

What you got there, babe?

I'm gonna replace that doorbell there.

Thank you.

Sit the fuck down!

Sit down!

Put your phones on the table, now!

It's okay, guys.

Do what they say.

It's gonna be all right.

Abby, Abby, Abby, it's okay.

Do what they say.

It's gonna be all right.

Do what they say.

Yeah, do what they say.

Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa.

Abby, is it?

You tell your man, Dre, that if he doesn't tell us where his heart and all that money, everything is most definitely not gonna be all right.

What are you talking about?

We don't have any money, hip and dear.

We saw the video!

Don't ask what's the crowd, schmall.

Don't ask the crowd.

Right, just tell us where you keep it.

That's all we want, we're gone.

Video, what video?

Get the fuck away!

I'm not fucking with you.

What would they call me?

I don't care.

Jeff, tell us where the fuck's the money?

Please, tell us the truth.

I don't have any money.

I don't have any fucking money.

I don't give a fuck what you want.

I want the fucking money!

Now, he said he doesn't trust the banks.

He said it's here somewhere.

So where the fuck is it?

No, that doesn't touch me.

I can show you where it is.

I can show you where it is.

What the fuck are you talking about?

I can show you where it is.

I can show you where it is.

Please, please.

Keep your paw on the table.

And don't you even fucking think about trying anything.

Where's the money, Clint?

Clint, where is it?

Where's the money, baby?

It's here.

Baby, it's not here.

It's not here.

See, he's fucking lying.

It's here.

Oh, my God.

Oh, shit.

Oh, my God.

No!

No!

It's not here.

Oh, my God.

Baby, baby.

Look at me.

Look at me.

Honey!

Shit, shit.

Honey, no!

What the fuck am I going to do now?

This is on you.

This is on you.

You should have just immediately told us where the fucking money is.

Where the fuck did the other one go?

Fuck.

Shit.

Crap.

There they are.

What the fuck?

That's the big fucker.

Where's the fucking money?

Yeah, he's taking St. Law's.

Eden?

Holy shit, what happened?

Everything's fucked.

Everything's fucked.

What happened?

One of them got away.

What?

What happened?

Did you get the money?

Yes, Trevor.

Please, help.

Please.

Shut the fuck up.

One of them got away.

Out back.

We're fucked.

Hey, that's our set together.

Just get out there and help Trevor fucking find her, okay?

What do we have here?

Tell me where the money is.

Your hands go blue.

Please don't do this.

You got ten seconds.

Please, please, please, please don't do this.

Five seconds.

I don't have any money here.

There's the money.

You've got to believe me.

Oh, no, no, no, no, fuck.

No, no, no.

Oh, fuck.

Oh, God, no.

No, please.

Oh, fuck.

Oh, fuck.

I didn't want to kill you, but you've given me no choice.

Fuck you.

You lucky

bitch.

Fuck you.

You fucking bitch.

Fuck you.

Blood ass.