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Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:00:00,032 --> 00:00:01,654 Previously on This Is Us... 2 00:00:01,656 --> 00:00:04,016 I'm not gonna do that trial, Randall. 3 00:00:04,018 --> 00:00:05,174 And I really don't want to hear 4 00:00:05,176 --> 00:00:06,712 what either of you has to say about it 5 00:00:06,714 --> 00:00:09,114 because I have made the decision for myself. 6 00:00:09,116 --> 00:00:11,149 This could've saved her life. 7 00:00:11,151 --> 00:00:13,280 Don't you ever wonder what it would've been like 8 00:00:13,282 --> 00:00:14,437 if Dad hadn't died? 9 00:00:14,439 --> 00:00:17,455 No. I don't, Randall. Do you? 10 00:00:17,457 --> 00:00:19,823 Dad, if you go back in that house, so help me, God, 11 00:00:19,825 --> 00:00:22,526 I'll go through that front door and get you myself! 12 00:00:22,528 --> 00:00:23,627 Dad, look! 13 00:00:25,598 --> 00:00:28,098 Every single day. 14 00:00:36,041 --> 00:00:38,484 I haven't been able to stop thinking about it 15 00:00:38,486 --> 00:00:41,412 since I asked my brother, 16 00:00:41,414 --> 00:00:45,849 what my life would be like if my dad hadn't died. 17 00:00:48,288 --> 00:00:51,221 What do you think would've been different? 18 00:00:56,984 --> 00:00:59,984 - Synced and corrected by Firefly - - www.addic7ed.com - 19 00:01:05,671 --> 00:01:08,204 It's all just... 20 00:01:08,206 --> 00:01:10,873 gone? 21 00:01:10,875 --> 00:01:12,875 Yeah. 22 00:01:12,877 --> 00:01:15,011 You're lucky you weren't there. 23 00:01:15,013 --> 00:01:16,913 All right. 24 00:01:16,915 --> 00:01:18,515 Here you go. 25 00:01:18,517 --> 00:01:20,617 - Thank you. - Waters all around. 26 00:01:20,619 --> 00:01:22,652 Hey, uh, you guys need anything else? 27 00:01:22,654 --> 00:01:24,481 I can heat up some food for you to eat, or... 28 00:01:24,483 --> 00:01:25,890 - No, thank you. - No. Thank you. 29 00:01:25,892 --> 00:01:27,235 - Mom, Dad. - Guys... 30 00:01:27,237 --> 00:01:28,932 - Hey, Kev. Is everyone okay? - Hi, sweetheart. God... 31 00:01:28,934 --> 00:01:30,688 - Are you okay? - Yeah, no, no, no, I'm fine. 32 00:01:30,690 --> 00:01:32,495 Yeah, no, I'm fine. I'm okay. 33 00:01:32,497 --> 00:01:33,598 - Hi, baby doll. - Hi, Mom. 34 00:01:33,600 --> 00:01:34,737 Just some minor burns. 35 00:01:34,739 --> 00:01:36,379 Hey, the doctor said I'm gonna be fine. 36 00:01:36,381 --> 00:01:38,137 He said the smoke inhalation was minimal. 37 00:01:38,139 --> 00:01:40,379 Yeah, thank God you didn't go back in the house. 38 00:01:40,381 --> 00:01:43,037 Well, thank God that fireman actually got to Louie. 39 00:01:43,039 --> 00:01:44,374 I wouldn't be able to live with myself. 40 00:01:44,376 --> 00:01:45,941 - He okay? - Yeah, I think so. 41 00:01:45,943 --> 00:01:47,376 Okay. 42 00:01:47,378 --> 00:01:51,413 Hey, guys, listen to me. 43 00:01:51,415 --> 00:01:53,816 We're all gonna be fine. 44 00:01:53,818 --> 00:01:57,152 - Yeah. - Right? We're here, together. 45 00:01:57,154 --> 00:01:58,787 That's all that matters. 46 00:01:58,789 --> 00:02:02,123 This family is the only thing that matters. 47 00:02:04,829 --> 00:02:07,563 So, I just got off the phone with the police. 48 00:02:07,565 --> 00:02:09,565 They have officially cleared the house. 49 00:02:09,567 --> 00:02:12,874 I'm gonna go over there and see what's left, 50 00:02:12,876 --> 00:02:16,037 see if there's anything salvageable. 51 00:02:19,681 --> 00:02:21,388 Bec. 52 00:02:21,390 --> 00:02:23,545 We'll find temporary housing. 53 00:02:23,547 --> 00:02:24,645 - No, no, no, babe, it's-it's... - Okay? We... 54 00:02:24,647 --> 00:02:26,614 It's not about the house. 55 00:02:26,616 --> 00:02:28,916 I mean, we, we could have died. 56 00:02:30,820 --> 00:02:33,220 And it just... 57 00:02:33,222 --> 00:02:36,290 it-it puts things in perspective, you know? 58 00:02:36,292 --> 00:02:38,726 Like what? 59 00:02:38,728 --> 00:02:41,729 Like... 60 00:02:45,268 --> 00:02:49,404 Things you know you should share, 61 00:02:49,406 --> 00:02:53,908 but you don't because it's hard. 62 00:02:53,910 --> 00:02:57,997 And... time goes by. 63 00:02:57,999 --> 00:03:02,435 And then more time goes by, and eventually you're... 64 00:03:06,355 --> 00:03:09,723 I have to tell you something. 65 00:03:10,959 --> 00:03:12,759 Randall? 66 00:03:12,761 --> 00:03:16,864 Hey, uh, Miguel took Kate and Kevin to go buy some essentials. 67 00:03:16,866 --> 00:03:18,540 I'm looking up that info you asked about, 68 00:03:18,542 --> 00:03:21,568 - the fire insurance policy, you know... - Son, just... 69 00:03:24,239 --> 00:03:25,371 What's wrong? 70 00:03:25,373 --> 00:03:26,973 What happened? 71 00:03:29,778 --> 00:03:31,945 Mom, you're really freaking me out. 72 00:03:33,081 --> 00:03:35,081 Sweetheart. 73 00:03:36,881 --> 00:03:39,281 When you were a baby... 74 00:03:42,390 --> 00:03:45,191 ... I met your father. 75 00:03:46,428 --> 00:03:48,428 Your birth father. 76 00:03:51,065 --> 00:03:53,065 My... 77 00:03:54,440 --> 00:03:55,640 My-my what? 78 00:03:57,071 --> 00:03:59,151 How? 79 00:03:59,153 --> 00:04:03,011 He, he was hanging around outside the hospital, 80 00:04:03,013 --> 00:04:06,259 and I followed him back to his apartment. 81 00:04:06,261 --> 00:04:08,952 But, sweetheart, you have to understand, 82 00:04:08,954 --> 00:04:10,902 he was not well, okay? 83 00:04:10,904 --> 00:04:16,230 He was an addict and I, I-I got out of there 84 00:04:16,232 --> 00:04:17,857 and I never said anything to anyone. 85 00:04:17,859 --> 00:04:19,883 And then I tried to go back years later... 86 00:04:19,885 --> 00:04:21,159 Wait, wait, wait, wait. 87 00:04:26,868 --> 00:04:30,068 This whole time, you knew who he was? 88 00:04:32,373 --> 00:04:34,973 You just kept it secret from me? 89 00:04:38,778 --> 00:04:40,812 - All these years. - No, no, no, no, no. 90 00:04:40,814 --> 00:04:44,549 He just found out five minutes ago, okay? 91 00:04:47,321 --> 00:04:48,820 What's his name? 92 00:04:49,856 --> 00:04:51,890 What is his name?! 93 00:04:51,892 --> 00:04:53,658 William... 94 00:04:53,660 --> 00:04:55,260 William Hill. 95 00:04:59,199 --> 00:05:01,199 I'm sorry, I'm sorry. 96 00:05:01,201 --> 00:05:03,868 - Stop, stop. - Okay, okay. 97 00:05:03,870 --> 00:05:05,870 Do you know where he lives? 98 00:05:05,872 --> 00:05:09,882 Um, I don't know if he still lives there, but I can, 99 00:05:09,884 --> 00:05:11,966 - I can show you where he lived years ago. - No, no, no. 100 00:05:11,968 --> 00:05:13,898 Just give me the address. And I can go by myself. 101 00:05:13,900 --> 00:05:16,499 - No, you won't. - No. I need to do this, Dad. 102 00:05:16,501 --> 00:05:19,783 I know. I know. 103 00:05:19,785 --> 00:05:21,385 I'll go with you. 104 00:05:23,356 --> 00:05:27,191 - Hey, Dad? - Yeah? 105 00:05:27,193 --> 00:05:29,160 This isn't... I... 106 00:05:29,162 --> 00:05:31,362 This isn't about you. 107 00:05:31,364 --> 00:05:33,797 Uh, l-like, wanting to meet him. I... 108 00:05:33,799 --> 00:05:35,632 Yeah, no, I know. 109 00:05:35,634 --> 00:05:38,369 Yeah, it's okay. 110 00:05:38,371 --> 00:05:41,638 I think this is it. 111 00:05:41,640 --> 00:05:43,840 You ready? 112 00:05:45,911 --> 00:05:47,144 - Uh-huh. - Yeah. 113 00:05:56,722 --> 00:05:58,721 Can I help you? 114 00:05:59,757 --> 00:06:00,990 Are you William Hill? 115 00:06:00,992 --> 00:06:03,159 Last I checked. 116 00:06:04,762 --> 00:06:07,597 My name is Randall Pearson. 117 00:06:07,599 --> 00:06:09,031 I think I'm your son. 118 00:06:14,960 --> 00:06:18,208 Wow. Top of your class. 119 00:06:18,210 --> 00:06:19,442 That's something. 120 00:06:19,444 --> 00:06:20,934 Hey, what can I say? 121 00:06:20,936 --> 00:06:22,612 I work hard. 122 00:06:22,614 --> 00:06:24,614 Not trying to brag or anything. 123 00:06:24,616 --> 00:06:26,616 - We're very proud of him. - Yeah. 124 00:06:26,618 --> 00:06:28,118 Mm. 125 00:06:28,120 --> 00:06:32,521 Well, so, uh, do you play any instruments? 126 00:06:32,523 --> 00:06:33,852 Oh, well, 127 00:06:33,854 --> 00:06:36,010 I'm not really the musical one in the family. 128 00:06:36,012 --> 00:06:37,768 My sister Kate is. 129 00:06:37,770 --> 00:06:40,627 She gets it from my mom. My adopted mom. 130 00:06:40,629 --> 00:06:42,329 Randall. 131 00:06:43,800 --> 00:06:46,201 Uh, speaking of, 132 00:06:46,203 --> 00:06:50,514 I was wondering if you could, uh, tell me more about 133 00:06:50,516 --> 00:06:53,584 - my biological mom? - Oh... 134 00:06:53,586 --> 00:06:56,054 Well... 135 00:06:56,056 --> 00:06:57,937 Do you know the feeling you get 136 00:06:57,939 --> 00:07:00,591 when you take a sip of something hot? 137 00:07:00,593 --> 00:07:02,626 That was Laurel. 138 00:07:02,628 --> 00:07:06,331 She was a warm drink straight to your soul. 139 00:07:07,905 --> 00:07:09,978 She stopped using when she was pregnant, 140 00:07:09,980 --> 00:07:12,669 but right after you were born... 141 00:07:12,671 --> 00:07:15,505 Old habits. 142 00:07:15,507 --> 00:07:17,941 She didn't make it. 143 00:07:17,943 --> 00:07:20,966 And me, I... I didn't know the first thing 144 00:07:20,968 --> 00:07:23,162 about raising a baby on my own. 145 00:07:26,651 --> 00:07:30,420 You were never not wanted. 146 00:07:31,355 --> 00:07:33,355 In fact... 147 00:07:37,672 --> 00:07:42,564 ... I wrote these for you a long time ago. 148 00:07:42,566 --> 00:07:46,801 I never thought anyone else would see it besides me. 149 00:07:54,545 --> 00:07:56,712 Maybe I can go back next week? 150 00:07:58,649 --> 00:08:01,183 You know, Randall, I really think you should 151 00:08:01,185 --> 00:08:04,887 temper your expectations of this guy, just a little bit. 152 00:08:04,889 --> 00:08:06,088 What do you mean? 153 00:08:06,090 --> 00:08:08,524 He was a very nice man. 154 00:08:08,526 --> 00:08:13,262 But I think, I think he might still be using. 155 00:08:13,264 --> 00:08:16,665 - So? - So I'm really not too comfortable 156 00:08:16,667 --> 00:08:18,300 with my son spending time with a guy who's... 157 00:08:18,302 --> 00:08:20,335 - Come on, Dad. - ... involved with that. 158 00:08:20,337 --> 00:08:23,538 Dad, you're an addict, too. 159 00:08:27,377 --> 00:08:29,844 Please. 160 00:08:40,457 --> 00:08:42,623 It's been 161 00:08:42,625 --> 00:08:46,594 a tough time for my family lately. 162 00:08:48,998 --> 00:08:50,398 From the, uh, 163 00:08:50,400 --> 00:08:52,795 American Songbook, these are riffs that I've been... 164 00:08:52,797 --> 00:08:54,992 It's been a long time since I've spoken 165 00:08:54,994 --> 00:08:57,137 to a room full of people like this. 166 00:08:58,274 --> 00:09:00,006 So I've been thinking, 167 00:09:00,008 --> 00:09:03,856 I'm probably gonna stay home for college, go to Carnegie Mellon. 168 00:09:03,858 --> 00:09:05,214 But you got into Howard. 169 00:09:05,216 --> 00:09:06,762 I thought that was your top choice. 170 00:09:06,764 --> 00:09:09,450 It was, but... 171 00:09:09,452 --> 00:09:13,053 I-I thought it'd be nice to spend more time together. 172 00:09:13,055 --> 00:09:14,254 Right? 173 00:09:14,256 --> 00:09:17,023 Right. 174 00:09:17,025 --> 00:09:18,258 That's cool. 175 00:09:19,928 --> 00:09:22,396 Hey, sweetheart, if you did forget anything, 176 00:09:22,398 --> 00:09:24,131 we'll be happy to drive it over to you. 177 00:09:26,755 --> 00:09:29,278 You sure you don't want me to come with you guys 178 00:09:29,280 --> 00:09:30,359 and help you move in? 179 00:09:30,361 --> 00:09:31,805 The car's pretty packed, 180 00:09:31,807 --> 00:09:33,773 so there's only really room for two of us. 181 00:09:33,775 --> 00:09:35,875 Okay. 182 00:09:35,877 --> 00:09:38,511 I'm gonna go say bye to Kevin and Kate. 183 00:09:38,513 --> 00:09:39,713 Okay. 184 00:09:42,417 --> 00:09:45,418 Hey. He's just sorting through everything. 185 00:09:45,420 --> 00:09:47,453 - Yeah. - Okay? 186 00:09:47,455 --> 00:09:49,455 He'll come around. 187 00:09:57,799 --> 00:10:00,033 - Oh... - Oh, oh, I-I'm sorry. 188 00:10:00,035 --> 00:10:01,867 No problem. 189 00:10:04,606 --> 00:10:06,371 Beth, we are so thrilled 190 00:10:06,373 --> 00:10:07,408 to have you here tonight. 191 00:10:07,410 --> 00:10:08,674 This is the first time we've had 192 00:10:08,676 --> 00:10:11,210 all of our kids home from college at the same time. 193 00:10:11,212 --> 00:10:13,337 Oh, thank you for having me over. 194 00:10:13,339 --> 00:10:17,116 Oh, I-I brought, uh, a little something. 195 00:10:17,118 --> 00:10:19,278 - Oh, you didn't need to do that. You don't... - It's just a little gift. 196 00:10:19,280 --> 00:10:21,376 You don't need to bring us a g... whoa! Hot sauce? 197 00:10:21,378 --> 00:10:23,445 No, no, give that here. 198 00:10:24,559 --> 00:10:27,096 Uh, my-my dad loved hot sauce, too. 199 00:10:27,098 --> 00:10:29,162 Uh, he always brought it with him 200 00:10:29,164 --> 00:10:30,796 to every house we went as a gift. 201 00:10:30,798 --> 00:10:32,727 But it wasn't actually a gift, he just wanted 202 00:10:32,729 --> 00:10:34,801 to make sure he always had hot sauce. 203 00:10:34,803 --> 00:10:36,602 Randall told us that, um, 204 00:10:36,604 --> 00:10:38,359 that he passed last year. 205 00:10:38,361 --> 00:10:40,338 We were very sorry to hear that. 206 00:10:40,340 --> 00:10:42,908 Yeah, I can't imagine going through 207 00:10:42,910 --> 00:10:45,177 all of that stuff at your age, sweetheart. 208 00:10:45,179 --> 00:10:47,146 Yeah, we really shouldn't make her 209 00:10:47,148 --> 00:10:48,914 talk about it right now, Mom. 210 00:10:48,916 --> 00:10:50,849 - I'm sorry. - No, it... 211 00:10:50,851 --> 00:10:52,718 - No, no, no, no, it's-it's fine. - I'm sorry. 212 00:10:52,720 --> 00:10:54,071 - It's fine. - Thank you. 213 00:10:54,073 --> 00:10:56,789 - This is, uh, wonderful. - Yeah. 214 00:10:56,791 --> 00:10:58,623 Sweetheart, 215 00:10:58,625 --> 00:11:00,592 how do you like your salad? I added those 216 00:11:00,594 --> 00:11:03,095 little slivered almonds in there just for you. 217 00:11:03,097 --> 00:11:05,397 Don't really like almonds. 218 00:11:06,633 --> 00:11:08,033 What? 219 00:11:08,035 --> 00:11:09,634 Since when? 220 00:11:09,636 --> 00:11:12,004 Never have. 221 00:11:12,006 --> 00:11:15,373 Could you show me where the bathroom is? 222 00:11:15,375 --> 00:11:17,041 It's right through the kitchen. 223 00:11:17,043 --> 00:11:19,043 Can you show me? 224 00:11:20,350 --> 00:11:21,540 It's good, Mom. 225 00:11:21,542 --> 00:11:22,897 I like the almonds. 226 00:11:22,899 --> 00:11:25,323 Was that a "rescue me" head nod 227 00:11:25,325 --> 00:11:27,418 or a "I want to go sneak in a quick make-out" head nod? 228 00:11:27,420 --> 00:11:28,619 That was a "quit being such 229 00:11:28,621 --> 00:11:31,723 a dick to your mom" head nod. 230 00:11:31,725 --> 00:11:33,337 You need to forgive her. 231 00:11:33,339 --> 00:11:34,892 Beth, you don't know what you're talking about. 232 00:11:34,894 --> 00:11:37,061 - You don't know how I... - Look, I carry bottles of hot sauce 233 00:11:37,063 --> 00:11:40,198 because they remind me of my dead dad. 234 00:11:40,200 --> 00:11:43,868 And you get not one, but two, 235 00:11:43,870 --> 00:11:46,270 living, breathing, really freaking 236 00:11:46,272 --> 00:11:48,332 cool dads, okay? 237 00:11:48,334 --> 00:11:50,741 Li... life is short, Randall. 238 00:11:50,743 --> 00:11:52,075 It's too damn short. 239 00:11:54,246 --> 00:11:57,180 - So Dad hops in to grab Kevin out of the pig pen. - Uh-huh. 240 00:11:57,182 --> 00:12:00,416 And he's screaming because he's decided he loves this pig... 241 00:12:00,418 --> 00:12:02,018 She won best in show at the county fair. 242 00:12:02,020 --> 00:12:03,854 It was a big deal when I was five. 243 00:12:03,856 --> 00:12:05,756 So-so me, Kate and my mom 244 00:12:05,758 --> 00:12:08,458 are outside the fence, terrified... 245 00:12:08,460 --> 00:12:10,127 We were screaming. 246 00:12:10,129 --> 00:12:11,798 - You remember that, crying? - Yes. 247 00:12:11,800 --> 00:12:13,096 You remember that? 248 00:12:13,098 --> 00:12:14,420 Yes, how can I forget? 249 00:12:14,422 --> 00:12:15,999 Actually, do you want to tell this part? 250 00:12:16,001 --> 00:12:17,167 You tell it better. 251 00:12:20,906 --> 00:12:24,074 Um... 252 00:12:24,076 --> 00:12:26,076 the, um... 253 00:12:26,078 --> 00:12:28,644 the little pig started squealing and then 254 00:12:28,646 --> 00:12:31,280 muddy little Kevin over here 255 00:12:31,282 --> 00:12:33,515 started squealing right back. 256 00:12:33,517 --> 00:12:36,051 And then Jack started squealing... 257 00:12:45,263 --> 00:12:48,165 I remember picking Randall up from school 258 00:12:48,167 --> 00:12:50,666 one day in, uh, sixth grade. 259 00:12:50,668 --> 00:12:54,536 And he was studying the periodic table. 260 00:12:54,538 --> 00:12:57,840 He was so excited to tell me about Marie Curie 261 00:12:57,842 --> 00:13:00,641 and her husband Pierre... 262 00:13:00,643 --> 00:13:04,512 who had discovered radium and polonium 263 00:13:04,514 --> 00:13:06,681 together. 264 00:13:06,683 --> 00:13:08,049 Kid's 11. 265 00:13:09,619 --> 00:13:11,603 And I-I remember him saying to me, 266 00:13:11,605 --> 00:13:14,718 "Dad, I want to marry someone 267 00:13:14,720 --> 00:13:16,590 I can discover elements with". 268 00:13:16,592 --> 00:13:19,694 Lets raise our glasses. 269 00:13:19,696 --> 00:13:20,995 To Randall and Beth. 270 00:13:20,997 --> 00:13:22,297 To Randall and Beth. 271 00:13:25,635 --> 00:13:28,870 And that is how you got the name Tess. 272 00:13:28,872 --> 00:13:33,040 Because of a ceiling fan of all things. 273 00:13:33,042 --> 00:13:35,943 Pretty perfect first grandkid, huh? 274 00:13:35,945 --> 00:13:38,611 No complaints here. 275 00:13:40,415 --> 00:13:42,049 Mind if I join? 276 00:13:42,051 --> 00:13:44,784 Come on in, Grandpa. 277 00:13:50,292 --> 00:13:52,326 Hey, beautiful. 278 00:13:52,328 --> 00:13:53,660 All right. 279 00:13:53,662 --> 00:13:54,794 Ham's in the oven. 280 00:13:54,796 --> 00:13:56,763 Everyone's arriving at 2:00. 281 00:13:56,765 --> 00:13:59,632 The Pearson Christmas Feast is right on track. 282 00:13:59,634 --> 00:14:01,201 Fruitcake? 283 00:14:01,203 --> 00:14:03,237 Nah, stomach's a little funny. 284 00:14:03,239 --> 00:14:05,739 Again? 285 00:14:05,741 --> 00:14:07,173 We rarely catch 286 00:14:07,175 --> 00:14:09,409 stomach cancer in its earliest stages. 287 00:14:09,411 --> 00:14:12,111 You are a very lucky man. 288 00:14:12,113 --> 00:14:15,359 Lucky my boy here's a relentless son of a gun. 289 00:14:15,361 --> 00:14:16,816 Hey, guys, gather round. 290 00:14:16,818 --> 00:14:18,050 Let me get this picture real quick. 291 00:14:18,052 --> 00:14:22,278 Everybody say, "Thanksgiving hot dogs wrapped in cheese". 292 00:14:22,280 --> 00:14:24,991 Thanksgiving hot dogs wrapped in cheese! 293 00:14:24,993 --> 00:14:26,259 Yeah! 294 00:14:26,261 --> 00:14:27,326 Okay, wait, no. 295 00:14:27,328 --> 00:14:28,661 I want to get one, too. 296 00:14:28,663 --> 00:14:30,997 On my phone... 297 00:14:30,999 --> 00:14:32,965 Where did I put my phone? 298 00:14:32,967 --> 00:14:35,139 No, wait, hold on a sec. It was just here. 299 00:14:35,141 --> 00:14:36,996 - What's wrong, hon? - Can't find my phone. 300 00:14:36,998 --> 00:14:38,070 I'll help you look for it, Rebecca. 301 00:14:38,072 --> 00:14:40,071 I just had it. 302 00:14:40,073 --> 00:14:42,674 She misplaced her phone again. 303 00:14:48,081 --> 00:14:50,416 I'm sorry to interrupt you, 304 00:14:50,418 --> 00:14:52,984 Randall, but I suspect 305 00:14:52,986 --> 00:14:54,553 that you and your father are about 306 00:14:54,555 --> 00:14:56,655 to band together to save your mother? 307 00:14:56,657 --> 00:14:59,513 So I'm just trying to keep track here. 308 00:14:59,515 --> 00:15:01,993 In the version of your life 309 00:15:01,995 --> 00:15:03,595 where your father lives, 310 00:15:03,597 --> 00:15:06,624 you immediately find your birth father, 311 00:15:06,626 --> 00:15:08,400 get him clean, 312 00:15:08,402 --> 00:15:10,001 your parents' marriage survives, 313 00:15:10,003 --> 00:15:12,018 you have the same wife and kids, 314 00:15:12,020 --> 00:15:13,704 cure stomach cancer, 315 00:15:13,706 --> 00:15:16,407 and you get your mother into this clinical trial? 316 00:15:16,409 --> 00:15:19,076 Yeah, that's what I think would've happened. 317 00:15:20,278 --> 00:15:21,511 Gotcha. 318 00:15:23,460 --> 00:15:26,151 Hey, there's, um, 319 00:15:26,153 --> 00:15:28,176 Scrabble and Connect Four 320 00:15:28,178 --> 00:15:29,786 in the cabinet behind you. 321 00:15:29,788 --> 00:15:32,455 You're in that chair for another half an hour. 322 00:15:32,457 --> 00:15:35,048 We could either play games or you could be honest. 323 00:15:35,050 --> 00:15:37,083 Your choice. 324 00:15:40,614 --> 00:15:42,738 I don't understand. 325 00:15:42,740 --> 00:15:44,891 You asked for my version. 326 00:15:44,893 --> 00:15:46,199 Rose-colored or not, 327 00:15:46,201 --> 00:15:47,803 that's what I gave you. 328 00:15:47,805 --> 00:15:50,929 Randall, when we started working together, 329 00:15:50,931 --> 00:15:53,606 you asked me to challenge you. 330 00:15:53,608 --> 00:15:55,948 Now let's try this again. 331 00:15:55,950 --> 00:15:59,460 This time tell me what scares you the most 332 00:15:59,462 --> 00:16:00,913 about what could have happened 333 00:16:00,915 --> 00:16:03,249 if your father survived that night? 334 00:16:24,739 --> 00:16:27,106 Please say something. 335 00:16:29,076 --> 00:16:31,209 What do you want me to say? 336 00:16:34,649 --> 00:16:36,815 That you... 337 00:16:36,817 --> 00:16:39,284 understand why I did it? 338 00:16:39,286 --> 00:16:43,122 You met our son's birth father 339 00:16:43,124 --> 00:16:46,324 and then you lied to me about it for 17 years. 340 00:16:46,326 --> 00:16:48,961 What am I supposed to understand about that? 341 00:16:48,963 --> 00:16:52,031 That I was trying to protect him. 342 00:16:52,033 --> 00:16:53,899 Protect him from what? 343 00:16:53,901 --> 00:16:55,333 William was sick. 344 00:16:55,335 --> 00:16:56,434 He was an addict. 345 00:16:56,436 --> 00:16:57,936 I was, I was worried 346 00:16:57,938 --> 00:16:59,738 he would want to take Randall away from us. 347 00:16:59,740 --> 00:17:01,753 Well, then we could have dealt with that 348 00:17:01,755 --> 00:17:04,076 together as a family. 349 00:17:04,078 --> 00:17:06,979 But you made that call on your own. 350 00:17:08,482 --> 00:17:09,981 You... 351 00:17:09,983 --> 00:17:11,884 You were wrong, Bec. 352 00:17:11,886 --> 00:17:13,985 My God, you were so wrong. 353 00:17:13,987 --> 00:17:15,486 I wanted to tell you so many times. 354 00:17:15,488 --> 00:17:16,620 Then why didn't you, huh? 355 00:17:16,622 --> 00:17:18,430 Because I was scared. 356 00:17:18,432 --> 00:17:20,624 And I-I knew that you would want to do 357 00:17:20,626 --> 00:17:21,893 what you thought was right. 358 00:17:21,895 --> 00:17:23,828 And I'm-I'm sorry. 359 00:17:23,830 --> 00:17:25,462 I'm sorry, Jack. 360 00:17:25,464 --> 00:17:26,998 I'm so sorry. 361 00:17:29,335 --> 00:17:31,769 I can't even look at you right now. 362 00:17:31,771 --> 00:17:33,624 The Rebecca that I know? 363 00:17:33,626 --> 00:17:36,382 She isn't capable of something this cruel. 364 00:17:36,384 --> 00:17:39,436 She is not capable of keeping our son 365 00:17:39,438 --> 00:17:41,746 away from his birth father. 366 00:17:42,949 --> 00:17:44,715 - Oh, my God... - Stop! 367 00:17:44,717 --> 00:17:46,583 Randall... 368 00:17:46,585 --> 00:17:49,586 I will take care of our son. 369 00:18:07,172 --> 00:18:09,706 Look, if it's bibles you're selling, I've got several. 370 00:18:09,708 --> 00:18:12,629 William Hill? 371 00:18:12,631 --> 00:18:15,255 I don't love it when people know my name 372 00:18:15,257 --> 00:18:16,846 and I'm not familiar with theirs. 373 00:18:19,150 --> 00:18:21,117 I'm Randall Pearson. 374 00:18:21,119 --> 00:18:23,453 17 years ago, I was left at a fire station 375 00:18:23,455 --> 00:18:25,321 in Bethel Park. 376 00:18:26,673 --> 00:18:28,740 I'm your son. 377 00:18:36,501 --> 00:18:38,601 That's impossible. 378 00:18:38,603 --> 00:18:41,237 My mom says she saw you at the hospital the day that I was... 379 00:18:41,239 --> 00:18:42,538 I said that's impossible! 380 00:18:43,608 --> 00:18:45,441 I've never had children. 381 00:18:45,443 --> 00:18:46,643 And I don't got a son. 382 00:18:46,645 --> 00:18:48,110 Mr. Hill! 383 00:18:53,016 --> 00:18:55,751 Hey, listen to me. 384 00:18:55,753 --> 00:18:58,453 That man may not know he has a son, 385 00:18:58,455 --> 00:19:00,522 but you have a father. 386 00:19:00,524 --> 00:19:02,891 You hear me? 387 00:19:05,829 --> 00:19:08,363 Howard has summer classes. 388 00:19:08,365 --> 00:19:10,666 I think I might go early. 389 00:19:14,605 --> 00:19:17,461 Okay. 390 00:19:17,463 --> 00:19:19,886 That's why we take care 391 00:19:19,888 --> 00:19:22,377 of our community, 'cause family is everything. 392 00:19:22,379 --> 00:19:24,669 _ 393 00:19:24,671 --> 00:19:26,280 Now my brother Quinton here's gonna lead us 394 00:19:26,282 --> 00:19:27,826 by "setting owt" a march. 395 00:19:27,828 --> 00:19:30,885 Let's clap it up for Brother Randall 396 00:19:30,887 --> 00:19:32,653 for leading a great group 397 00:19:32,655 --> 00:19:34,188 and being a great example. 398 00:19:36,225 --> 00:19:38,459 What's the motto of this group? 399 00:19:38,461 --> 00:19:39,960 Lifting as we climb! 400 00:19:39,962 --> 00:19:42,519 - We lift! We lift! - We climb! We climb! 401 00:19:42,521 --> 00:19:44,097 Que team! 402 00:19:44,099 --> 00:19:46,166 Que team! 403 00:19:46,168 --> 00:19:49,603 Que team! 404 00:19:49,605 --> 00:19:51,138 Que Psi Phi! 405 00:19:57,913 --> 00:20:01,081 ♪ Well, it's time ♪ 406 00:20:01,083 --> 00:20:04,084 ♪ For us to throw down ♪ 407 00:20:04,086 --> 00:20:06,887 ♪ For my Que Psi Phi ♪ 408 00:20:06,889 --> 00:20:10,557 ♪ Omega Psi Phi, for my Que Psi Phi ♪ 409 00:20:10,559 --> 00:20:11,725 ♪ Que Psi Phi! ♪ 410 00:20:32,778 --> 00:20:36,270 It is the first time we have all the kids 411 00:20:36,272 --> 00:20:37,838 home from college at the same time. 412 00:20:37,840 --> 00:20:39,618 It's nice, isn't it, Jack? 413 00:20:39,620 --> 00:20:42,154 Yeah. 414 00:20:45,159 --> 00:20:47,326 Uh, Rebecca, 415 00:20:47,328 --> 00:20:49,502 this Cornish hen is delicious. 416 00:20:49,504 --> 00:20:51,361 Oh, thank you, Sophie. 417 00:20:51,363 --> 00:20:53,471 - Yeah, Mom, really juicy. - Thank you. 418 00:20:53,473 --> 00:20:55,263 Hey, I helped. How about 419 00:20:55,265 --> 00:20:57,036 throwing some compliments my way, guys? 420 00:20:57,038 --> 00:20:58,637 Oh, okay, Kevin. 421 00:20:58,639 --> 00:21:00,940 You're-you're the next Iron Chef. 422 00:21:00,942 --> 00:21:02,473 Dad, think I should 423 00:21:02,475 --> 00:21:04,976 quit Lundy and, uh, go to culinary school? 424 00:21:04,978 --> 00:21:08,179 You make one decent piece of chicken, and you want to 425 00:21:08,181 --> 00:21:09,847 abandon your old man on the job? 426 00:21:19,993 --> 00:21:21,826 So, Randall, how's school? 427 00:21:22,862 --> 00:21:24,162 It's fine. 428 00:21:26,900 --> 00:21:29,267 Just... just fine? 429 00:21:37,444 --> 00:21:40,011 I can remember your first day of kindergarten. 430 00:21:40,013 --> 00:21:41,979 You burst through those front doors, 431 00:21:41,981 --> 00:21:43,848 you couldn't wait to get to the car and tell me 432 00:21:43,850 --> 00:21:46,350 everything about your day, and now you've been gone 433 00:21:46,352 --> 00:21:49,345 for a whole semester, and all I get is a "fine"? 434 00:21:49,347 --> 00:21:51,380 Bec, please. 435 00:22:04,402 --> 00:22:07,571 I'm gonna go. I'm gonna catch a bus back to D.C. 436 00:22:07,573 --> 00:22:09,238 What, wait, now, Randall? 437 00:22:09,240 --> 00:22:11,107 Hey, wait. Wait, wait, wait, wait... 438 00:22:11,109 --> 00:22:12,943 Dad, no. I thought I could do it. 439 00:22:12,945 --> 00:22:15,144 I thought enough time had passed and I'd be able to come back 440 00:22:15,146 --> 00:22:17,681 and things would be normal, but they're not. 441 00:22:17,683 --> 00:22:20,049 And they're never going to be. 442 00:22:20,051 --> 00:22:22,886 - I'm sorry. - Randall, don't leave, man. 443 00:22:22,888 --> 00:22:24,020 Randall, please stay. 444 00:22:35,963 --> 00:22:42,137 And my son, just 11 years old, he walks clear across town 445 00:22:42,139 --> 00:22:47,642 just so he can get his favorite girl her favorite doughnuts. 446 00:22:47,644 --> 00:22:49,476 - Aw... - It was in that moment, 447 00:22:49,478 --> 00:22:51,183 Kevin, that I knew you'd spend 448 00:22:51,185 --> 00:22:54,016 the rest of your life going the extra mile 449 00:22:54,018 --> 00:22:55,783 just to make Sophie happy. 450 00:22:55,785 --> 00:22:57,685 - I'm proud of you, son. - Thank you. 451 00:22:57,687 --> 00:22:59,988 Hear, hear. Cheers. 452 00:23:01,924 --> 00:23:04,325 Your dad is kind of a hottie. 453 00:23:04,327 --> 00:23:06,991 Uh, see, this is why I didn't want you coming with me. 454 00:23:06,993 --> 00:23:10,164 I'm just teasing. 455 00:23:10,166 --> 00:23:13,267 You're a lot to unpack, RP. 456 00:23:13,269 --> 00:23:14,800 Two years, and I've never once 457 00:23:14,802 --> 00:23:16,802 heard you talk about these people. 458 00:23:18,942 --> 00:23:21,232 Hey, let me show my face real quick, 459 00:23:21,234 --> 00:23:23,478 then we can get out of here, all right? 460 00:23:23,480 --> 00:23:24,678 Mmm. 461 00:23:26,082 --> 00:23:27,786 Thank you very much for coming. 462 00:23:27,788 --> 00:23:30,078 Hey, Kev. 463 00:23:30,080 --> 00:23:31,545 - Hey. - Congrats, man. 464 00:23:31,547 --> 00:23:33,480 - Oh, thank you. Thanks. - Really happy for you. 465 00:23:33,482 --> 00:23:36,084 - Happy you came. - Yeah, man. 466 00:23:36,086 --> 00:23:40,321 Um, Dad told me Big Three had a killer quarter. 467 00:23:40,323 --> 00:23:42,323 - That's great. - Yeah, yeah. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, we did. 468 00:23:42,325 --> 00:23:43,958 We got the city to commission two houses. 469 00:23:43,960 --> 00:23:45,860 - Okay. - And, uh, yeah, we've been doing great. 470 00:23:45,862 --> 00:23:48,361 - I'm trying to convince the old man to retire. - Ah. 471 00:23:48,363 --> 00:23:50,231 - Good luck with that. - Probably die with a hammer in his hands. 472 00:23:50,233 --> 00:23:51,866 That's what I always say. 473 00:23:51,868 --> 00:23:53,701 Yeah. 474 00:23:53,703 --> 00:23:56,670 Uh... Oh, hey, I read in the paper you got the Brunel, 475 00:23:56,672 --> 00:23:59,023 uh, teaching award. That-That's-that's huge, man. 476 00:23:59,025 --> 00:24:00,474 - Thank you very much, man. - Yeah. 477 00:24:00,476 --> 00:24:01,569 No, work's been good. 478 00:24:01,571 --> 00:24:03,978 My students have been good. 479 00:24:03,980 --> 00:24:05,746 Students are g... I can see that. 480 00:24:05,748 --> 00:24:09,007 Uh, she's my T.A., man, it's nothing serious. 481 00:24:09,009 --> 00:24:10,605 Well, it's never serious with you, 482 00:24:10,607 --> 00:24:11,908 - brother, is it? - Ah... 483 00:24:11,910 --> 00:24:13,654 - Well, hey. - Look at this. 484 00:24:13,656 --> 00:24:16,657 - When did you sneak in? - Yeah, oh, just a sec ago. 485 00:24:16,659 --> 00:24:18,648 - Yeah? - And hi to this little lady. 486 00:24:18,650 --> 00:24:21,043 - Say hi. - Not so little anymore, huh? 487 00:24:21,045 --> 00:24:23,564 No. You want to go see Daddy? 488 00:24:23,566 --> 00:24:25,165 Here, you go see Daddy. 489 00:24:25,167 --> 00:24:26,900 That's a yes. 490 00:24:26,902 --> 00:24:28,702 - See you later. - Go see Daddy. 491 00:24:28,704 --> 00:24:32,072 - Oh, man. Time flies. - Mm. 492 00:24:32,074 --> 00:24:34,742 I know. Oh, wait, did Kev tell you? 493 00:24:34,744 --> 00:24:37,809 - Tell me what? - About going to the cabin for Fourth of July? 494 00:24:37,811 --> 00:24:39,112 We're gonna have a big blowout. 495 00:24:39,114 --> 00:24:40,853 - Ah... - Ethan said he'd watch the girls, 496 00:24:40,855 --> 00:24:43,516 so, you know, I thought we'd have a Big Three soiree? 497 00:24:43,518 --> 00:24:47,353 No, that sounds great. Um, but with schedules and... 498 00:24:47,355 --> 00:24:49,355 I don't know, let me think about it, yeah? 499 00:24:49,357 --> 00:24:51,557 All right. 500 00:24:51,559 --> 00:24:53,559 - Okay. - Just let him think about it. 501 00:24:53,561 --> 00:24:56,329 - Kev... - What's wrong with saying I'll think about it? 502 00:24:56,331 --> 00:24:58,800 Nothing. Nothing. You do it all the time. 503 00:24:58,802 --> 00:25:00,600 You think about it and then you never show up. 504 00:25:00,602 --> 00:25:01,903 - Mm-hmm. - I'm-I'm curious, like, 505 00:25:01,905 --> 00:25:03,236 why did you even bother coming today? 506 00:25:03,238 --> 00:25:04,634 - 'Cause Dad asked me to. - Uh, Dad asked you to? 507 00:25:04,636 --> 00:25:05,665 - Oh, well, glad you came. - Yeah. 508 00:25:05,667 --> 00:25:07,373 - Thank you for gracing us with your presence. - Guys. 509 00:25:07,375 --> 00:25:08,775 - Thanks, Randall. It's been wonderful. - Guys. 510 00:25:08,777 --> 00:25:10,777 - I'm not talking about... - Hey, boys? 511 00:25:10,779 --> 00:25:12,971 Whatever you're talking about can probably wait 512 00:25:12,973 --> 00:25:15,080 until our guests leave. 513 00:25:15,082 --> 00:25:16,782 Yeah. 514 00:25:16,784 --> 00:25:18,881 Hi, Randall. 515 00:25:18,883 --> 00:25:20,348 - Hey, Mom. - Hi. 516 00:25:22,049 --> 00:25:23,938 You know, I was just about to leave, anyway. 517 00:25:23,940 --> 00:25:25,691 I got a lecture in the morning, so... 518 00:25:25,693 --> 00:25:27,659 Right. 519 00:25:58,623 --> 00:26:01,123 _ 520 00:26:04,537 --> 00:26:10,569 _ 521 00:26:15,945 --> 00:26:21,090 _ 522 00:26:27,923 --> 00:26:32,494 _ 523 00:27:02,554 --> 00:27:04,955 Ah. 524 00:27:04,957 --> 00:27:07,190 So, lesson plans are on your nightstand. 525 00:27:07,192 --> 00:27:09,826 - Mm-hmm. - And I've uploaded the fall semester grades. 526 00:27:09,828 --> 00:27:11,694 - You're the best. - Mm-hmm. 527 00:27:12,898 --> 00:27:14,597 Mm. 528 00:27:17,569 --> 00:27:19,403 Hey, Dad. 529 00:27:19,405 --> 00:27:21,638 Hey, son. Catch you at a bad time? 530 00:27:21,640 --> 00:27:23,974 No. Just got in from a run. 531 00:27:23,976 --> 00:27:26,876 I don't have a lecture till noon. What's up? 532 00:27:27,913 --> 00:27:32,316 Well... Thanksgiving is next week. 533 00:27:32,318 --> 00:27:35,518 I was hoping you'd come home. 534 00:27:35,520 --> 00:27:38,822 - Dad. - You're just... y-you're so far away. 535 00:27:38,824 --> 00:27:41,893 You should be with your family for the holiday. 536 00:27:46,164 --> 00:27:47,831 Randall, 537 00:27:47,833 --> 00:27:50,066 it's been a long time. 538 00:27:50,068 --> 00:27:55,237 You're gonna have to forgive her at some point, son. 539 00:27:56,274 --> 00:27:59,909 She's not well, Randall. 540 00:27:59,911 --> 00:28:02,979 Not well? What do you mean? 541 00:28:02,981 --> 00:28:04,814 A few months ago, 542 00:28:04,816 --> 00:28:10,119 I started to notice things... just little things. 543 00:28:10,121 --> 00:28:14,523 She'd forget where she put her keys or her phone. 544 00:28:14,525 --> 00:28:16,658 She couldn't remember the name of a movie 545 00:28:16,660 --> 00:28:18,494 that we had just seen... 546 00:28:53,030 --> 00:28:55,030 I'm done. 547 00:28:55,032 --> 00:28:58,066 I don't want to do this anymore. 548 00:29:01,803 --> 00:29:03,669 I mean, what exactly are we doing here? 549 00:29:03,671 --> 00:29:06,416 What is the point of this exercise? 550 00:29:06,418 --> 00:29:10,920 I need you to acknowledge that even if your father had lived, 551 00:29:10,922 --> 00:29:13,422 that every moment in your life after that 552 00:29:13,424 --> 00:29:14,937 could have gone a million different ways. 553 00:29:14,939 --> 00:29:18,364 - I'm aware of that. - You're aware that you don't 554 00:29:18,366 --> 00:29:21,264 control the outcomes of every situation in your life? 555 00:29:21,266 --> 00:29:22,889 Yes. 556 00:29:22,891 --> 00:29:26,668 In your fantasy, you were the one 557 00:29:26,670 --> 00:29:29,737 who stopped your father from going back in the house. 558 00:29:29,739 --> 00:29:32,840 Why are you so sure you could've stopped him? 559 00:29:32,842 --> 00:29:35,643 Dad, if you go back in that house, so help me, God, 560 00:29:35,645 --> 00:29:38,146 I'll go through that front door and get you myself! 561 00:29:45,222 --> 00:29:46,721 Just stay there, I'll be right back! 562 00:29:46,723 --> 00:29:48,756 Jack! Jack! 563 00:29:48,758 --> 00:29:50,858 But it wasn't the fire that killed him. 564 00:29:50,860 --> 00:29:52,961 It was his heart. 565 00:29:52,963 --> 00:29:54,695 I could've gone to the hospital with him. 566 00:29:54,697 --> 00:29:57,332 I should've been there. 567 00:30:02,839 --> 00:30:05,539 I'm gonna try and go find a pay phone and call Kate, 568 00:30:05,541 --> 00:30:07,441 - see if they've found Kevin. - Okay. 569 00:30:07,443 --> 00:30:09,043 Okay. 570 00:30:18,254 --> 00:30:19,553 I can't believe 571 00:30:19,555 --> 00:30:22,122 the Broncos won the... 572 00:30:25,061 --> 00:30:26,726 Dad? You... 573 00:30:26,728 --> 00:30:28,829 Something's wrong. 574 00:30:28,831 --> 00:30:30,564 Something's not right. 575 00:30:30,566 --> 00:30:34,935 You said he had a widowmaker heart attack, right? 576 00:30:34,937 --> 00:30:36,937 That's right. 577 00:30:36,939 --> 00:30:38,939 So, even if you were there, 578 00:30:38,941 --> 00:30:41,007 you might not have been able to save him. 579 00:30:41,009 --> 00:30:43,746 Unless you're gonna tell me that, as a 17-year-old, 580 00:30:43,748 --> 00:30:46,412 you were trained in emergency cardiac resuscitation. 581 00:30:46,414 --> 00:30:48,414 I don't know, damn it, but I could've done something. 582 00:30:48,416 --> 00:30:51,017 That's what I do. I fix things. 583 00:30:51,019 --> 00:30:53,152 - You couldn't fix this. - Yeah, well at least I could've spent 584 00:30:53,154 --> 00:30:55,464 the last 20 years knowing that I tried. 585 00:30:57,559 --> 00:30:59,192 So, 586 00:30:59,194 --> 00:31:01,060 so you think that would've made a difference 587 00:31:01,062 --> 00:31:03,830 in how you processed his death? 588 00:31:03,832 --> 00:31:05,915 Knowing that you tried to save him? 589 00:31:05,917 --> 00:31:07,917 Yes! 590 00:31:09,170 --> 00:31:11,304 Why do you think that? 591 00:31:13,207 --> 00:31:15,474 Because I tried with William. 592 00:31:15,476 --> 00:31:19,077 And when it became clear to me that it was hurting 593 00:31:19,079 --> 00:31:23,415 more than it was helping, I was okay letting him choose to stop. 594 00:31:23,417 --> 00:31:25,217 Because we had tried. 595 00:31:28,623 --> 00:31:30,623 Okay. 596 00:31:31,692 --> 00:31:33,025 What? 597 00:31:33,027 --> 00:31:35,430 - Nothing, I said okay. - Mm-mm. 598 00:31:35,432 --> 00:31:38,823 Mm-mm. No, you don't think it's the same, right? 599 00:31:38,825 --> 00:31:41,852 But you don't think it's the same because I knew my dad 600 00:31:41,854 --> 00:31:44,135 my whole life and I knew William for less than a year, 601 00:31:44,137 --> 00:31:45,937 so the bond was different. 602 00:31:45,939 --> 00:31:48,940 Obviously it was easier for me to make peace with his death? 603 00:31:48,942 --> 00:31:50,918 Is that what you think? 604 00:31:50,920 --> 00:31:54,512 I-I think I lost two fathers. 605 00:31:54,514 --> 00:31:56,681 And I think if I'd had it my way, 606 00:31:56,683 --> 00:31:59,984 obviously I wouldn't have lost either one of them. 607 00:31:59,986 --> 00:32:02,253 So to answer your first question, yes, 608 00:32:02,255 --> 00:32:05,623 I'm fully aware that I'm just a-a cute little pawn 609 00:32:05,625 --> 00:32:08,259 on the universe's big giant chess board. 610 00:32:08,261 --> 00:32:09,661 I don't need an exercise 611 00:32:09,663 --> 00:32:11,763 from some overpriced therapist in cheap shoes 612 00:32:11,765 --> 00:32:13,230 to prove it to me. 613 00:32:16,570 --> 00:32:18,870 That was uncalled for. 614 00:32:18,872 --> 00:32:20,538 Sorry. 615 00:32:20,540 --> 00:32:23,207 Oh, please, I live for this stuff. 616 00:32:26,345 --> 00:32:28,768 It's interesting, Randall, 617 00:32:28,770 --> 00:32:31,248 how you see this entirely as 618 00:32:31,250 --> 00:32:33,650 an exercise about losing your father. 619 00:32:33,652 --> 00:32:35,773 Your fathers. Plural fathers. 620 00:32:35,775 --> 00:32:37,288 I don't follow. 621 00:32:37,290 --> 00:32:42,626 Actually, this whole exercise began because of a disagreement 622 00:32:42,628 --> 00:32:48,332 that you had with your brother over your mother's care. 623 00:32:48,334 --> 00:32:53,137 If you think about it, your life has really been defined 624 00:32:53,139 --> 00:32:55,339 by your mothers, hasn't it? 625 00:32:55,341 --> 00:32:57,774 The mother you lost at birth, 626 00:32:57,776 --> 00:33:00,243 who is barely a footnote in your story, 627 00:33:00,245 --> 00:33:03,161 and the mother who lied to you for 36 years. 628 00:33:03,163 --> 00:33:04,314 All right, look. 629 00:33:04,316 --> 00:33:07,784 William told me everything he knew about my birth mother. 630 00:33:07,786 --> 00:33:11,354 It was a romance that was sweet for a time, 631 00:33:11,356 --> 00:33:14,257 but it was short-lived and drug-addled. 632 00:33:14,259 --> 00:33:17,393 I'll never know much about her, 633 00:33:17,395 --> 00:33:21,264 I've accepted that long ago. 634 00:33:21,266 --> 00:33:23,700 As for my mother Rebecca... 635 00:33:25,771 --> 00:33:29,006 ... yeah, she lied to me. 636 00:33:29,008 --> 00:33:31,008 But I forgave her for that. 637 00:33:31,010 --> 00:33:33,976 And we've moved on. I've accepted that, too. 638 00:33:35,479 --> 00:33:36,578 Have you? 639 00:33:36,580 --> 00:33:38,014 Absolutely. 640 00:33:38,016 --> 00:33:39,715 It's behind us. 641 00:33:41,352 --> 00:33:42,384 It's... 642 00:33:42,386 --> 00:33:44,586 It's curious, though, 643 00:33:44,588 --> 00:33:48,819 that in both your scenarios of how your life 644 00:33:48,821 --> 00:33:51,426 would've played out if your father had lived... 645 00:33:51,428 --> 00:33:54,329 the first thing that happens after you save him, 646 00:33:54,331 --> 00:33:56,231 the first thing, 647 00:33:56,233 --> 00:33:59,334 is your mother tells the truth about William. 648 00:34:06,544 --> 00:34:09,410 Why do you think you're here in my office right now? 649 00:34:09,412 --> 00:34:10,712 I know, I know, 650 00:34:10,714 --> 00:34:12,881 because everybody who comes to therapy 651 00:34:12,883 --> 00:34:15,349 has these deep-seated mommy issues, right? 652 00:34:15,351 --> 00:34:18,419 I didn't say therapy. I said my office. 653 00:34:18,421 --> 00:34:19,854 My office. 654 00:34:21,058 --> 00:34:23,058 Do you know how many black men 655 00:34:23,060 --> 00:34:26,661 who can choose whatever therapist they want choose me? 656 00:34:26,663 --> 00:34:29,330 It's a very low number. 657 00:34:29,332 --> 00:34:31,932 You were highly recommended. 658 00:34:32,968 --> 00:34:35,769 Your mother and I are the same gender, 659 00:34:35,771 --> 00:34:37,171 we're the same race, 660 00:34:37,173 --> 00:34:41,642 I'm probably around the same age she was when your father died. 661 00:34:41,644 --> 00:34:43,578 Another therapist... 662 00:34:43,580 --> 00:34:46,647 a good one, not an overpriced hack like me... 663 00:34:46,649 --> 00:34:50,233 might say you're looking for someone like your mother 664 00:34:50,235 --> 00:34:53,421 to help you process her. 665 00:34:53,423 --> 00:34:55,289 What she's done. 666 00:34:55,291 --> 00:34:57,558 Her illness. 667 00:35:04,434 --> 00:35:06,600 I'm not a neurologist, Randall, 668 00:35:06,602 --> 00:35:08,950 and I don't know your mother's condition. 669 00:35:08,952 --> 00:35:12,010 But I'm pretty sure you don't have all the time in the world 670 00:35:12,012 --> 00:35:16,147 to heal from the wounds that you have from her. 671 00:35:18,179 --> 00:35:19,679 So, what are you saying? 672 00:35:19,681 --> 00:35:24,083 What is the exact advice that you're giving me? 673 00:35:24,085 --> 00:35:26,052 I'm a therapist. 674 00:35:26,054 --> 00:35:27,754 I don't give advice. 675 00:35:27,756 --> 00:35:32,392 I offer observations and I pose questions. 676 00:35:32,394 --> 00:35:34,761 Observation. 677 00:35:34,763 --> 00:35:38,265 Even in the worst version of your life, 678 00:35:38,267 --> 00:35:40,766 you still protect your mother, 679 00:35:40,768 --> 00:35:43,168 you still redeem her in the end. 680 00:35:44,472 --> 00:35:46,672 Question. 681 00:35:46,674 --> 00:35:50,376 Have you ever really confronted your mother 682 00:35:50,378 --> 00:35:53,479 about what she did to you? 683 00:35:53,481 --> 00:35:55,748 About what she kept from you? 684 00:36:05,091 --> 00:36:06,590 Hey. 685 00:36:06,592 --> 00:36:10,794 It took six episodes, but it finally makes sense. 686 00:36:10,796 --> 00:36:12,560 - And, baby... - Huh? 687 00:36:12,562 --> 00:36:14,562 I might be leaving you for Yahya. 688 00:36:14,564 --> 00:36:18,399 Ah... I thought we was gonna binge Watchmen together. 689 00:36:18,401 --> 00:36:20,835 You okay? 690 00:36:20,837 --> 00:36:22,570 You look exhausted. 691 00:36:23,974 --> 00:36:28,932 Turns out I'm still holding on to some residual resentments 692 00:36:28,934 --> 00:36:31,146 about my mom keeping William from me. 693 00:36:31,148 --> 00:36:33,314 Well, hell, I could've told you that. 694 00:36:33,316 --> 00:36:36,151 - How much we paying this lady? - Mm-hmm. 695 00:36:53,903 --> 00:36:56,604 What was that for? 696 00:36:56,606 --> 00:36:59,473 I am very proud of you. 697 00:37:06,048 --> 00:37:07,348 - Okay. - Okay. 698 00:37:07,350 --> 00:37:09,350 - All right. - Here we go. 699 00:37:10,653 --> 00:37:14,154 Uh... half of a square? 700 00:37:14,156 --> 00:37:16,691 I'm gonna need more than that. That's... that's nothing. 701 00:37:16,693 --> 00:37:19,171 It's, uh... it's the train tracks from, 702 00:37:19,173 --> 00:37:20,860 uh... it's... 703 00:37:20,862 --> 00:37:22,595 - How do you... ? - What is it?! 704 00:37:22,597 --> 00:37:24,735 It's Mission to Mars. Mission... Mission to Mars. 705 00:37:24,737 --> 00:37:26,832 Of course, obviously, yeah, it's Mission to Mars. 706 00:37:26,834 --> 00:37:28,267 - It looks like an 11. - There's no mission, 707 00:37:28,269 --> 00:37:29,365 - there's no Mars. - My turn, 708 00:37:29,367 --> 00:37:31,360 but you're gonna go for me, because my phone's ringing. 709 00:37:31,362 --> 00:37:32,739 - Okay? Do me proud. - Okay. 710 00:37:32,741 --> 00:37:34,798 I will definitely do better than Toby's impressionistic 711 00:37:34,800 --> 00:37:36,055 - spaceship. - Clearly, it's a r... 712 00:37:36,057 --> 00:37:37,650 it's a rocket ship going up into... 713 00:37:37,652 --> 00:37:39,387 You know what? I would kill it on Fallon, I don't care what... 714 00:37:39,389 --> 00:37:40,714 Hi, sweetheart. 715 00:37:40,716 --> 00:37:42,482 Hey, Mom. 716 00:37:42,484 --> 00:37:44,484 Wow, it's late out there. 717 00:37:44,486 --> 00:37:46,519 Is everything okay with Beth and the girls? 718 00:37:46,521 --> 00:37:48,087 Yeah, yeah, they're fine. 719 00:37:48,089 --> 00:37:49,120 Asleep. 720 00:37:49,122 --> 00:37:51,724 Was just calling to talk. 721 00:37:51,726 --> 00:37:54,092 Haven't really done that since New York. 722 00:37:54,094 --> 00:37:55,260 Yeah. 723 00:37:55,262 --> 00:37:57,396 I know. How are you? 724 00:37:57,398 --> 00:37:59,431 I'm good. 725 00:37:59,433 --> 00:38:03,435 I just, uh, have been thinking a lot about your decision. 726 00:38:03,437 --> 00:38:06,226 Oh, Randall, come on, sweetheart, 727 00:38:06,228 --> 00:38:07,673 I thought we had put that to bed. 728 00:38:07,675 --> 00:38:09,140 I told you, 729 00:38:09,142 --> 00:38:11,510 I have no interest in being away from the family. 730 00:38:11,512 --> 00:38:15,604 Okay? I-I respect the fact that you're passionate about it, 731 00:38:15,606 --> 00:38:16,660 but I really don't want to talk 732 00:38:16,662 --> 00:38:18,061 about the clinical trial anymore. 733 00:38:19,487 --> 00:38:21,760 Dr. Leigh, 734 00:38:21,762 --> 00:38:25,797 everything you've said makes sense. 735 00:38:27,027 --> 00:38:30,125 And I've probably known about it all for a while 736 00:38:30,127 --> 00:38:32,997 but haven't been able to... 737 00:38:32,999 --> 00:38:34,899 find it. 738 00:38:36,302 --> 00:38:39,270 I'm grateful to you for your help today. 739 00:38:39,272 --> 00:38:40,872 Mom, 740 00:38:40,874 --> 00:38:43,641 I've been a good son. 741 00:38:43,643 --> 00:38:46,143 And I never say stuff like that, 742 00:38:46,145 --> 00:38:49,213 but I know that I have been. 743 00:38:49,215 --> 00:38:51,482 After Dad died, 744 00:38:51,484 --> 00:38:53,418 I stayed at home. 745 00:38:53,420 --> 00:38:55,586 I took care of you. 746 00:38:55,588 --> 00:38:58,556 I have been a good son. 747 00:38:59,826 --> 00:39:01,015 I know you have. 748 00:39:01,017 --> 00:39:02,817 You've-you've always been. 749 00:39:03,596 --> 00:39:06,596 And I've let things go, Mom. 750 00:39:08,000 --> 00:39:09,599 Things... 751 00:39:09,601 --> 00:39:12,602 that were kept from me. 752 00:39:12,604 --> 00:39:15,267 Things that I should have resented you for, 753 00:39:15,269 --> 00:39:16,273 but I never did, 754 00:39:16,275 --> 00:39:20,344 because I knew that it would be painful for you. 755 00:39:20,346 --> 00:39:22,746 So I didn't. 756 00:39:23,749 --> 00:39:26,016 I know. 757 00:39:26,018 --> 00:39:28,552 I lost my father, 758 00:39:28,554 --> 00:39:32,041 and I couldn't stop it. 759 00:39:32,043 --> 00:39:34,100 I lost a second father, 760 00:39:34,102 --> 00:39:36,927 and I couldn't fix that either. 761 00:39:36,929 --> 00:39:40,330 And now my mother is sick, 762 00:39:40,332 --> 00:39:42,265 and there are options. 763 00:39:42,267 --> 00:39:45,668 I have never asked you for anything, Mom. 764 00:39:45,670 --> 00:39:47,966 Not in my entire life. 765 00:39:47,968 --> 00:39:49,872 I've never asked you for anything. 766 00:39:49,874 --> 00:39:54,410 But I'm gonna ask you for something now. 767 00:39:54,412 --> 00:39:59,287 Mom, you have to do this clinical trial. 768 00:39:59,289 --> 00:40:01,912 And I know you don't want to, 769 00:40:01,914 --> 00:40:03,586 but you have to. 770 00:40:03,588 --> 00:40:06,826 'Cause I don't want to be in a therapy session 771 00:40:06,828 --> 00:40:10,048 20 years from now, playing out scenarios, 772 00:40:10,050 --> 00:40:11,673 wishing that I had pushed harder, 773 00:40:11,675 --> 00:40:13,154 wishing that I had done more, 774 00:40:13,156 --> 00:40:14,392 'cause, maybe if I had, 775 00:40:14,394 --> 00:40:16,494 you would still be alive. 776 00:40:17,667 --> 00:40:20,668 I can't live with that, 777 00:40:20,670 --> 00:40:23,827 even if you can. 778 00:40:23,829 --> 00:40:25,637 I will come to therapy 779 00:40:25,639 --> 00:40:26,641 to work this through. 780 00:40:26,643 --> 00:40:29,644 I won't take it on alone. 781 00:40:30,647 --> 00:40:32,981 But I will not... 782 00:40:32,983 --> 00:40:37,785 relitigate what my mother did to me with William. 783 00:40:37,787 --> 00:40:41,429 I won't reopen that wound for her. 784 00:40:41,431 --> 00:40:44,688 I understand you think that hashing it out 785 00:40:44,690 --> 00:40:46,794 will bring me some kind of peace. 786 00:40:46,796 --> 00:40:49,116 Maybe you're right. I... 787 00:40:49,118 --> 00:40:51,284 I don't know. 788 00:40:52,468 --> 00:40:56,804 But I've already lost three parents. 789 00:40:56,806 --> 00:41:01,242 I know that losing my mother would break me. 790 00:41:03,046 --> 00:41:05,547 I can't lose her. 791 00:41:07,383 --> 00:41:12,053 I will do anything to keep that from happening. 792 00:41:13,361 --> 00:41:14,950 I'll do whatever 793 00:41:14,952 --> 00:41:16,480 it takes. 794 00:41:16,482 --> 00:41:19,045 I've been a good son, Mom. 795 00:41:19,047 --> 00:41:20,898 I've been a good son, 796 00:41:20,900 --> 00:41:23,664 and I've never asked you for anything. But I am 797 00:41:23,666 --> 00:41:27,000 asking you for this now. 798 00:41:28,103 --> 00:41:30,503 And I need you to say it. 799 00:41:31,607 --> 00:41:34,575 You are going to St. Louis. 800 00:41:34,577 --> 00:41:38,078 You are going to do this clinical trial. 801 00:41:56,157 --> 00:41:57,413 Okay. 802 00:41:58,967 --> 00:42:03,470 I will go to St. Louis, and I will do the trial. 803 00:42:13,694 --> 00:42:16,694 - Synced and corrected by Firefly - - www.addic7ed.com - 56638

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