Original subtitles

Ten, nine, eight--

Ah, Rocket Monkeys!

Go Monkeys!

Come back, my bride!

I love you.

My little snooky-poo.

Come out, come out wherever you are.

Ugh.

Hey Gus,

I've got a crazy idea.

Let's have a No Adventure day today.

You got it, Wally.

Whatever happens, no adventures.

I said, "no adventures"!

And that goes for you guys, too.

You heard the monkey.

Take it outside.

Rocket Monkeys!

I need your help!

I'm being chased by a horrible insect monster!

Hmm.

Sounds an awful lot like an adventure.

We're going to pass on this one.

Please help me.

Poopy-doopy!

M-M-M-Monkevil!

Say no more!

I'm here to help!

No way, she needs a real monkey.

And that means me!

It's hero time!

Gentlemens,

perhaps you should hear her story

before you commit to anything.

Yay!

Story time!

I was trapped in a loveless relationship.

I didn't want to marry him

but that big-ugly-bug-thing forced me to.

I'm a big ol' ugly bug-thing

and I want to make you really unhappy

for the rest of your life.

So you have to marry me!

Buzz, buzz, buzz.

Buzz, buzz, buzz.

I had to run away from that horrid insect.

Had to!

Now I need your help.

He's after me!

Poopy-doopy!

You have poopy-dooped the right monkey!

Gus is here!

You mean, Wally is here.

Make that Gus!

Wally! Gus!

Wally! Gus!

Wally, Wally! Gus, make that Gus!

Can I offer you some tea?

Something stronger?

This uh, this could take awhile.

Gus, Gus, Gus! Wally, Wally, Wally!

Aaah!

The point is.

I need to use your ship as a hideout.

Poopy-doopy?

I know you're in there, Snookums!

We are under attack from a not-so-happy bug ship.

Wally, you take care of that little nuisance,

while Monkevil and I share a bottle of banana bubbly

and make small talk.

You got it, bro!

Go away!

Shoo!

Shoo!

Get outta here!

And that's that.

So who's for monkey kisses?

Back off, bro!

She's mine!

Uh, boys?

Doh, eugh, oh!

That is ugh-ly!

I am Prince Bazzzz from the Planet

and I want my Pookie-Wookie-Snookie back.

No way, Grosso!

All right, fur-face,

reserve your judgment until you've heard my story.

It was the day of the big ceremony.

Ahem!

We're better with flashbacks.

Fine.

Insect flashback.

It was the day of the big ceremony.

I said to her real romantic-like,

"Monkevil, do you agree to marry me, Baz,

and care for our mucusy-larvae?"

And she said, "No!

"I only agree to swipe all the wedding gifts

because I am so ungrateful!"

Poopy-doopy!

But I still love her,

so I yelled,

"I still love you!

We can try counselling!"

Boy, that sure was different from the other flashback.

Which one should we believe?

Poopy-doopy?

Good enough for me.

Yup, we're gonna go with Monkevil on this one.

Final Answer.

If you try to keep me away from my Love Monkey,

I will destroy you,

tearing you limb from limb.

Starting with your robot.

What?!

Yes-yes, totally scared.

Listen, Bazzzz,

be a prince and hang on a second.

You have to help me.

You just have to!

Unfortunately,

we don't stand a chance against him!

Well, I guess there's only one thing we can do.

If it's Monkevil he wants,

it's Monkevil he gets!

Welcome to "Who's Your Bride?"

Our fiancé today is a large angry bug

whose hobbies include drooling mucus

and flying around poop.

So nice.

And our blushing brides-to-be are:

Monkevil!

Poopy-doopy.

Monkevil.

Poopy-doopy!

And finally, uh, Monkevil.

Poopy-doopier!

Really?

Strapless?

I can't believe I'm trusting my life

to a couple of bozo monkeys.

Your question?

Monkevil Number One,

if you had to steal only one thing,

what would it be?

Poopy-doopy!

Everything you own.

Poopy-doopy!

A mask for your big ugly face.

Poopy-doopy!

Your heart!

So who's it gonna be, bug boy?

I will marry...

You!

Oh!

I have so many people to thank!

Uh, Melinda, who did my nails.

And Joyce--

Just hold it a monkey second!

My dress is way cuter!

See!

It's got a slit

so you can see my hairy leg.

Don't cheap out on the wedding gifts!

Well, that worked out better than I thought.

Wait!

Can you believe that larva-for-brains

took all his stuff back?!

What about me?!

I've been rejected by a hideous bug!

Why don't you just stomp on my face

with your stinking bug foot?!

Marry me

and all this will be yours.

I don't know!

It's such a big commitment!

And what about my career?

Oooh!

Giddy-up!

So will you marry me?

Poopy-doopy.

Yes, yes, yes!

Oo, oo!

A thousand times yes!

I'm going to show that over-grown bug

that Gustav Monkey's nobody's second choice.

And I'm going to show that bug

he's messing with the wrong thief!

And I'm going to make sure

he treats my little Wally right.

At one time he's just a little ball of fur.

And then he leaves you, Yay-Ok.

Whoa!

Let's go, chop-chop.

The wedding's off!

Hey Gus!

Glad you could make it!

Poopy-doopy.

You don't mind if I use your catch phrase?

Bazzy loves it.

All yours.

I still say the wedding's Off!

But it would break Baz's heart.

All five of them.

Wait!

I have an idea!

Aaah!

So long, suckers.

Ah, seems like only three minutes ago

he was pooping himself.

I'm the luckiest bug in the galaxy.

This wedding is off!

Now I'm the prettier bro!

I mean bride!

Oh, and now this!

Ooh, so fierce!

I'm a tiger!

Claws out, claws in.

I'm soft.

Claws out!

Urgh!

Aaaah! Marry me?

What, huh, what, what, what, huh, what?!

What, what, what?!

In your face, monkey bro!

And after we're married

you will be showered with wealth!

Poopy-doopy!

Yahoo!

Ah!

Then you will have royal jelly poured all over your head

and be entombed

where your monkey organs will be removed

and your brain put into a crystal jar.

I uh, was kind of hoping for a long engagement.

And, of course,

I'll be eating the other monkey

as part of our honeymoon feast.

Yes!

I'm delicious.

Ugh.

Guess I'll have to rescue them.

Look, Baz!

A new bride!

Ah.

Be still my beating heart.

All five of them!

Thanks.

That's uh, that's really nice of you,

but YAY-OK rolls solo, huh?

They make such a beautiful couple.

I'm going to hold you,

and hug you,

and love you!

I'm keeping the ring!

You rescued us!

That must mean you like us!

Even though you're annoying, irritating, super smelly,

unpleasant to be around-- - She likes us!

Me more than you!

No monkey way! Yes, monkey way!

No, no, no, no, no. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.

Poopy-doopy.

No, no! Yeah, yeah!

Hey wait!

Where's my ring?!

Ha-ha!

Poopy-doopy!

Hey robot,

bring me another leafy green!

Get it your own!

You think I like doing this?

You think, oh, I had no options?

The universe was open to Yay-OK!

Oh, lot of offers.

Lot of offers!

This is Quiz Monkeys!

And here are our contestants.

Yay!

Woohoo! Oy!

Gus and Wally are monkeys

who enjoy eating bananas

and being super annoying.

Our other contestant is:

who cares?!

That's a joke.

Are you kidding me?

That's my intro?!

Buzz when you know the answer.

what is yellow and shaped like a banana?

A banana.

Incorrect!

A banana?

Correct!

That is what I just said.

Next question.

You kidding me?

It's a ba-na-na!

Incorrect.

Oh, oh, I-- I--

Ngh, I-- I--

Um, it's-- Oh!

Banana?

What the bolts?!

Are you kidding me?!

These are my answers!

Banana?

Banana!

Ba-nana, banana!

Um, curvy with a peel.

It's a banana.

Some people think it's a nut, but it is not.

It's a banana!

And the winners are--

Can you guess?

Gus and Wally!

We won!

You lost!

We good!

You stink!

And what's your fantabulous prize, you ask?

What's our fantabulous prize?!

A trip for two to...

... Banana Fun Land!

Banana Fun Land!

Hmmm.

My suspicion indicators are telling me

that this could be a terrible trap.

And now,

it's time to play Hot Bots,

where robots find true love.

Run along, monkeys.

Don't forget your toothbrushes.

Not that you ever use them.

My plan is working!

I, Lord Peel,

have tricked those awful monkeys

into a one-way trip to a distant wasteland

where I will never have to see them again.

Bwahaha!

Wait!

I can't miss that!

Bwahaha!

Whee!

We're here!

This is banana-tastic, right, bro?

Banana Fun Land.

Yip-pee.

Look at it, bro!

I'm look-at-it-ing!

Yee!

Woo-hoo-hoo-hoo!

Right about now

those pathetic monkeys should be starving.

What are you two doing?!

Hey, Banana Man!

Hiya, Banana Dude!

Stop it!

That's not food!

You're eating sand!

You mean sand-wiches?

Good one, Wal!

We made a sandwich joke with sand in it.

I didn't even realize it was a pun

until you said it was funny.

No, not a good one!

Let me explain.

back at that game show, remember?

"Bzzz, bananas!"

you were transported to this remote location where,

three, you are currently stranded

and will die miserably with no company

but a useless cactus!

Yay, cactus!

You want something to laugh at?

Oh, I'll give you something to laugh at!

Where's your funny now, monkeys?

Have fun dying!

Bachelorette-bot number one.

Which do you prefer:

peanut butter and jelly or cinnamon toast?

No, no!

Nein, nyet, nein, no, non!

I'm splashing you!

Splashy, splashy, splash!

Urgh!

It's sad times.

Droopy face times.

Why-am-I-living- this-sad-existence times!

Capiche?

Hurray!

Super happy sad times!

You really don't get it, do you?

You are in danger!

Hey, bozo.

Why'd you blast me down to my roots over here?

What's going on?

Did I do that?

Um,

I was merely making a point to these ridiculous monkeys!

You want a point?

Hey, here's a point. Ow!

Here's another point! Ugh!

You want more points? Ow!

Have some more freakin' points over here.

Cool ride.

It's mine now!

Ow, no!

Yay!

Ow.

But mostly yay!

Ow!

Noooo!

You put in all the hard work on an evil scheme,

and this is the thanks you get.

Aah!

Ahahaha!

Ah, aah!

These insufferable monkeys are driving me mad!

I must escape.

Hey look, Wally!

I found a lobster.

Ow!

Two can play stingy-stingy!

Ow!

Oh, that stings.

Good one, Gus!

You show that lobster who's boss!

Are you insane!

That's a giant killer scorpion!

You really aren't

the smartest monkey in the barrel,

are you?

Ooo!

Burny-burn!

Well, I don't know if it was that amusing.

It was hilarious!

Skin me, Peelio!

Say something else funny.

But I don't know.

I-- You--

You really aren't

the brightest planet in the solar system,

are you?

More, more, more!

I think you'll like this one.

Your elevator certainly doesn't go to the top floor!

Top floor!

Seriously, you are one funny Banana Dude.

I concur.

Why are you being so nice to me?

'Cause you're hilarious, Banana Dude!

Well, I have been taking some classes.

Nailed it!

It's 140 degrees out!

I don't know why

we built this campfire.

'Cause that's what friends do.

Friends also share.

Go ahead, Banana Friend.

Oh.

Mmm.

Intriguingly crunchy.

Oh, go ahead.

Just a nibble.

That tickles!

Go on, go on!

Bachelorette-bot number 3,

if you were in charge

of a couple of pathetic, hairy, unappreciative,

shiftless little degenerates,

what would you do?

Oh no, my monkeys!

Call me, huh?

And then when I went to the doctor

he says, "Relax, it's just normal bruising."

Ah.

I never thought I could be friends with monkeys.

You want to know my dream?

To stay here forever.

Right back atcha, Banana Man.

You mean Banana Dude!

You mean Banana Me.

You'll probably think me silly,

but when I was young,

there was this game I used to play.

Where's My Finger Been?

Hey, what's that smell?

Octopus Fist?

Pin the Tail on the Skunk?

Pin the Skunk on Another Skunk?

What Cream Is This?

Where's Mom?

Is She Ever Coming Back?

Hide and Seek.

I'll count.

You two hide.

One, two, three, four--

Rocket Monkeys,

I am so relieved that you are safe.

I'm so sorry you were fooled

by that evil fruit-shaped gentleman.

Evil?

Are you kidding?

He's a comic genius!

Ya, you know, I tell you.

For a super villain, he does-- He's very funny.

He does some interesting things.

Now back to the ship.

What about Banana Dude?

Shouldn't we take him with us?

And spoil his lifelong dream?

He said he wanted to stay here forever.

That's right.

We can't poop on his dream, bro!

Guh!

... 97, 98, 99, 100!

Ready or not,

here I come!

Yoohoo.

Aaah!

Aaaah!

Aaah!

If you're looking for the monkeys,

they left.

Took off!

Went bye-bye-- gone-zola!

You're wrong!

They're my friends!

They would never--

Those rotten monkeys!

I will have my revenge!

Ten, nine, eight -

Ah, Rocket Monkeys!

Go Monkeys!

Go get it, Inky! Fetchy sticky bringy backy!

Good job, Inky!

Oh my...

Urgh! Chimpsky out.

Hey! We're out of sticks.

Sorry, Inky. No more fetch.

Unless...

Ah!

Gentlemens, don't even think about it.

Hey Gentlemens, not the head.

It's the most important part of me!

Go long, Inky!

YAY-OK; Bolts!

You know, I never get a moment to myself.

It's uh, actually quite nice.

It's a bit sadness though, because once you're, uh,

by yourself with your thoughts

it's uh, it's more depressing...

Ink-dude! That was amazing!

Sorry, Gus.

He's too busy hugging his favorite monkey!

Wally, I think you should be aware

that I'm Inky's favorite monkey.

Liar! Take that back!

Hello?!

Not that I want to interrupt your monkey-slappy-fight,

but uh, floating off into space here!

Cranial drift!

Interesting, Slo-Mo.

You see that handsome devil?

Well, if it isn't that two-timing giggobot.

He said he'd call, but he never did!

Not the robot, you fool!

The good-looking chap with the tentacles!

Looks just like me, but with no clothes on.

Processing mental image of you naked...

Wait! Methinks I just came up with a genius plan!

Thanks for the fetch, Inky!

Oh, thank you. Maybe less help is required.

Woohoo-hoo-hoo!

Uh? Eh? Hmm?

I'm not seeing the resemblance.

The word you're looking for is identical!

By the Goiter of Gagnon,

I'll take this squid's place,

commandeer the monkey ship, escape,

and finally have my revenge!

They're all yours.

Reverse polarity!

Nefarious, you are a genius!

Woohoo!

Hey Wally, can you pass me a cup of "Inky likes me more?"

Oh, sorry, I couldn't hear you because, uh,

I have 2,000 pounds of

"Inky loves me more" wax in my ears!

Oh yeah, well, maybe I'll put on my "Inky loves me" pants

and put on my "Inky loves me" shirt

and then try to find some shoes that match

that say "Inky loves Gus".

Well, your "Inky loves you" pants are gonna fall down

unless you have your, uh, "Inky loves Wally more" belt,

which I'm wearing because Inky loves me more!

Inky's home!

We need an answer. Who do you love more -

Me or totally unlovable Wally?

Go on, Inky!

Make Gus cry like an ugly ol' little monkey baby.

Spit it out. Who do you love more?

Spit! Spit! Spit!

I think it looks like me.

Are you kidding?!

That chunk of corn is obviously me!

There's only one way to settle this -

Inky Love-Off!

Oh, you're so adorable...

I bet you would never break a roboheart...

No you wouldn't, no you wouldn't!

I meant to call you, seriously!

I just forgot the number. That's it, right?

Was it like, uh, 226, uh,

94-6000, extension 218, right?

It's seven. Oh. Seven. Really?

I thought I'd never escape from those monkeys.

Focus, Nefarious.

Get back to your evil plan.

Heya, friend-who-loves-me- more-than-Wally.

I've got treats for you!

It's the cilantro, isn't it?

Poopy time! Drop a blot.

Would it help if I go first?

Okay, your turn!

By the squid sack of Evestaff!

Relax, Inky. It's beddy-by time!

But first, a sweet, sweet lullaby...

Enough! I can't take it any more!

You can talk?!

It's, ah... an Inky miracle!

After all these years! But how?

Uh... It was the miracle of love that made me speak!

Sure, let's go with that one.

I'll bet it was my love, right?

Not smelly come-out-of-your-butt Gus love.

Not a slimy piece of rotting old meat,

dinky, stinky, finky, linky Wally love!

Stop it! Fine, you -

The somewhat slightly-less annoying one.

What's your name?! Gus!

Yes, Gus! I love you more.

Devastation!

I can't believe Inky likes Gus more than me!

Gus is so... Gussy!

Ooh...

What is the problem with that monkey?!

Doesn't he know how to drive a space ship?!

And why is it getting so hot in here?!

Oh, you know crybaby Wally!

Oh, you know crybaby Wally! When he gets upset he usually ends up

When he gets upset he usually ends up

steering us into a super nova!

He does what?!

Are you crazy? Crazy with sadness!

How can you like Gus more than me?!

Fine, you - Whatever your name is.

Wally. Sure, Wally.

I like YOU best!

Attention Gus!

I, Wally, am now Inky's favorite monkey!

Right? Yes, it's true.

Devastation!

Now what?!

You mean sour grapes Gus?

When he gets upset,

his brain shuts off and he pilots us into a black hole.

He'll kill us all!

That's for sure! Kisses!

And my wiring?

Copper that glitters like a hundred suns!

And you're not lying when you say

you want to transfer data together?

I've got a 3G plan just for you,

if you know what I mean...

So about my monkeys, uh, really...

Not yet.

How do you feel about baby-bots?

What about taking out the garbage?

Emptying the dishwasher, cleaning the toilet,

massaging my wires,

watching romantic comedies...

I'm never getting off this asteroid, am I?

No, wait! I like Gus best.

Devastation!

No, Wally!

WALLY and GUS:

Enough!

I am taking over this ship!

Someone needs a nappy nap! Seriously.

Freedom will be mine!

Ah, nuts.

Oh no! Wally, look!

But Inky needs his head!

Wait a sec...

Hmm...

Never mind.

Hold the phone... It was Nefarious all along!

Nice one, monkeys.

Anyhoo, Slo-Mo, it's been a slice, huh?

Let's keep in touch for sure.

Come on monkeys, let's go!

Just hold it a monkey minute!

No one's leaving this asteroid until I get some answers

to some pretty serious questions...

Who's your favourite annoying monkey -

Me or super un-annoying Wally?

I'm way more annoying than Gus!

I wrote the book on annoying!

I recorded the audio book of the annoying book you wrote!

I translated your audio book into French!

Je m'appelle annoying avec lalalalalananana!

Here's some annoying for you!

Come on, dribbldy drooler! Let's move it, grandpa!

Sheesh! What's with all this traffic?

Try pushing the "get outta the way" button.

Put the pedal to the bottom of the part where the pedal is!

You know, you could just fly around it, huh?

Don't tell us how to do our jobs!

I say we blow it up!

Don't tell me how to do my -

Wait! Good idea.

Commence slo-motion red blinky button push.

Wait a monkey minute!

That ship appears to be an early model BCW-X GASI Rocket.

They were decommissioned years ago, gentlemen.

GASI protocol says we must investigate.

Thanks, bore-o.

Ooh, look at that!

Perfectly preserved!

Observe the patina, gentlemen.

If memory, uh, serves correct,

they called that colour, 'Deep Space Grey'.

Ooh, look!

Old stuff. Wow.

Ok, go stand over there,

pretending to eat that petrified banana.

I love it! Come on -

One last one in front of that block of ice.

In this one, you're like explorers, okay?

Say 'monkey feet'.

Monkey feet...

Excellent shot.

This one's definitely going on my blog.

Wait a sec, uh, it appears there is

something frozen inside the ice block.

Oh, wait - It's just a frozen monkey.

Snorey borey!

Wait a second...

Oh my bolts! Can it be?!

What is it?! The suspense is boring us even more!

This monkey is...

Your father!

Papa! I knew you'd come back for us!

Ahh!

Why do I always kiss with my tongue?!

Pappy! It's you!

Just like the story our Mom always told us...

Your father was the bravest,

most dashing Rocket Monkey ever!

But one day he was sent out on a routine mission

to the fire planet of Explosia 13,

and mysteriously disappeared.

Hot! Hot! Hot!

So tragic!

So unexplained!

So, who wants to meet their new dad?

Wait for me, Meatball!

Dad, I can't believe it's you!

No time to waste, Wally.

We've got some father-son bonding to do!

Way ahead of you, bro.

Good night, Wally. Good night, Gus.

Good night, Dad!

Hey Dad, is it OK if I sleep with you tonight?

Don't be such a baby, Wally.

S-s-so h-h-happy...

Wally! Not again!

It wasn't me! Was so!

I went before bed! Yeah, and you went IN the bed!

Wait a second - It was Dad!

He really is like us!

Yay

dad!

I gotta hand it to Dad -

he sure knows how to get his toss on.

I made you breakfast, Wally.

Uh... Gentlemens?

What's with the accessorizing?

You kidding me? I am in force field mode.

After further observation,

I have concluded that your father is not

a sophisticated 'talky monkey'

like you two gentlemens.

Hey Gus, you hear that? We're miphisticated!

Uh, your daddy is more of a monkey-monkey,

from the original Rocket Monkey program.

You sayin' our old man's old school?!

Very, very, very old school.

Note the monkey's poor posture

and distinct lack of grooming.

Well, I suppose the differences are somewhat subtle, actually.

Your dad is just an irritating old monkey,

but I will attempt to communicate with him.

Uh-uh... Uh-huh...

So the two of you grew up together and...

Oh yeah!

No idea what he's saying.

Doesn't matter. He's our Dad!

We should call Dr. Chimpsky!

Ring a ding dong!

You ring a ding donged?

We've got a surprise for you!

Old school...

Uh-uh-uh old school...

It's an or-i-ginal Rocket Monkey!

He's old school!

Ugh! You found one of those?!

How horrible!

The original Rocket Monkey program was an utter disaster.

A total failure.

3... 2... 1...

3... 2... 1...

3... 2... 1...

Old school rocket monkeys are totally untrainable.

Completely!

All they know how to do is throw poop and blow up rockets.

So can we keep him?!

Enough! Heavens no.

I can't allow that kind of chaos on the ship!

Waaah!

Crying makes Chimpsky cave!

Waaaaaah! Crying! I'm crying!

Must... ignore... crying.

Can't... cave!

Repressed... childhood... issues...

Fine! If you can retrain him.

Mind you, an entire team of GASI scientists

wasn't able to do it -

but if you monkeys think you can, by all means...

Challenge accepted!

Science is no match for family, right, Wally?

Right, Gus!

First lesson - Proper poopy places!

Now this is a perfect spot!

Here, not so good.

Lots of poopertunities here.

But never this one.

You can do it on the ceiling as long as it stays.

Okay, you can do it in my bed 'cause I do,

but not in Gus's bed - but I do...

Now in this lesson we eat all classy-like with knife and fork.

No, no! Feet!

Use your feet first!

Go on!

This is how we check for duds!

Dud... Dud...

Now you try!

He's ready!

Well, Rocket Monkeys,

I hope you've had a successful training montage.

I have every confidence that this will be

a complete waste of time.

Let the tests begin now!

You heard Dr. Chimpsky - He has every confidence in you!

Just remember your training!

Feet! Use your feet!

Four!

Phew, that was a close one!

Don't forget to flush!

Ah! Impressive!

This old school Rocket Monkey is so good,

I'm going to assign him to your crew.

Finally, we can do THIS!

Hey look at that! That is a good one!

Now you can be with us forever, Dad.

Wait a second, here! Back up.

Hold the phone! Hold the fort!

Park the bus! Cease and desist!

Did you just call him "dad"? Did you?

Gotta go!

Sorry, Dr. C, mom's calling!

Hi, my little sugar beans! What's shaking?

Mother... May we present...

The newest member of our crew...

Dad? Oh, that's not your father.

This is your father.

But he is a total cutie-pants!

Call me!

He's not our father?!

What can I say? You all look the same to me!

Chimps!

He's just some gross old random monkey!

How could you break our hearts like that, Not-our-Dad!

What are we supposed to do with him now?

I guess some relationships don't last forever.

Funny old-timer...

I wonder if he'll remember us?

I wouldn't hold your breath.

Don't tell us how to do our jobs!

Ooh, you bad boy!

Oh you!

Stop it! No, go on...

You silly boy!