Original subtitles

♪♪♪♪

[ FRANTIC MUTTERING ]

‐HEY, MAMA BOO. ‐HEY, BABY.

WHAT ARE YOU DOING HERE SO EARLY?

I JUST CAME TO SAY HEY, AND I LOVE YOU SO MUCH.

OH, BABY, I LOVE TO YOU TOO.

OH. OKAY.

‐WHAT ‐‐ ‐DANNY!

WHAT IS GOING ON?

‐I'M GONNA KILL HIM! ‐OH!

NOT IF I GET TO HIM FIRST!

‐AH! WHERE IS HE? ‐WHAT?

I'M GONNA RIP YOUR LITTLE PRETTY FACE OFF!

AHA!

OKAY! OKAY! I'M SORRY!

‐NO, YOU'RE NOT. ‐WHAT IS GOING ON?

DANNY TRICKED US.

HEY, "TRICKED" IS SUCH A HARSH WORD.

LOOK, I'M TIRED, AND I'M PREGNANT.

SOMEBODY BETTER TELL ME WHAT'S GOING ON.

DANNY GOT A PROMOTION AT WORK.

OH, OH, OH!

OH! THAT'S SO GREAT, BOO!

[ LAUGHING ]

NO, IT'S NOT, BOO!

YES, IT IS! WHY?

BECAUSE HE DIDN'T EVEN TELL US IT WAS AVAILABLE.

I DIDN'T KNOW!

[ HUMMING "WEDDING MARCH" ]

OH, MY GOSH, IS THIS REAL LIFE?

YEAH, DUM, DUM, DU‐DUM.

THIS IS REALLY HAPPENING.

OH...

WHAT DO Y'ALL THINK ABOUT MY DRESS?

HMM.

AIN'T THAT NICE?

‐MAMA! ‐HUH?

‐GRANDMA. ‐WHAT?

YOU LOOK LIKE THE GRAM REAPER.

WHAT ‐‐ WHAT DO YOU HAVE ON?

MY OLD WEDDING DRESS.

SOMEONE ACTUALLY MARRIED IT?

THAT'S DISGUSTING.

WHY ARE YOU WEARING THIS?

'CAUSE I WANTED LINDA TO REPRESENT

THE HOUSE OF [SLURRING].

NO, MA'AM. IT'S NOT HAPPENING.

WHY IS IT BLACK?

WELL...

WELL... WHAT?

'CAUSE I WAS A HO.

GOT TO...

GOT TO TELL THE TRUTH AND SHAME THE DEVIL.

HO‐KAY.

GO AND TAKE THAT DRESS OFF.

ONLY IF YOU UNZIP MYSELF.

NO!

WHY Y'ALL HERE?

TRYIN' TO KILL DANNY.

WELL, DO IT OUTSIDE 'CAUSE I AIN'T GOT

NO MORE CLEANING PRODUCTS HERE.

WELL, YOU CERTAINLY HAVE THE DRESS

TO WEAR TO THE FUNERAL.

[ HATTIE MOCKING LAUGHTER ]

I'M GONNA BE WEARIN' IT TO YOURS IF YOU DON'T SHUT UP, DREW.

NOW, LINDA, I DON'T CARE WHAT YOU SAY.

YOU'RE WEARIN' THIS, YOUR DRESS, DOWN THE AISLE.

♪♪♪♪

CAPTIONS PAID FOR BY DISCOVERY COMMUNICATIONS

‐‐Captions by VITAC‐‐ www.vitac.com

♪♪♪♪

LINDA! LIN...

MA ‐‐ MA...

‐OH! ‐LINDA!

MAMA, LEAVE ME ALONE!

AIN'T NOTHING WRONG WITH THIS DRESS!

THAT THING'S SHARP.

IT'S NICE, ISN'T IT?

HAVE YOU LOOKED IN A MIRROR?

I DID, I DID.

AND WHAT DID YOU SEE?

I SAW A HOST OF ANGELS

COMING AFTER ME.

CHECK YOUR CONTACTS, MAMA.

THOSE WERE HELLHOUNDS.

GIRL, I SAW A VISION OF LOVELINESS.

THE MIRROR LIED.

AIN'T NOTHING WRONG WITH THIS DRESS!

MAMA, NO, THANK YOU. OKAY? [ SHUDDERS ]

LINDA! WOULD YOU, PLEASE?

IT WOULD MEAN SO MUCH TO ME.

IT WOULD MEAN SO MUCH, IT'D BE REALLY SPECIAL TO MY HEART.

[ WHIMPERS ]

[ FEIGNS SOBBING ]

MA ‐‐

[ HATTIE CONTINUES SOBBING ]

PLEASE?

[ SOBBING ]

[ GROANING ]

‐I ‐‐ I ‐‐ ‐LINDA, I BEG YOU ENOUGH.

NOW, COME... YOU GONNA SAY "YEAH" NOW?

I'M NOT WEARING BLACK TO MY WEDDING!

WHY?

WOULD YOU AT LEAST THINK ABOUT IT?

NO. JUST STOP, MAMA. OKAY?

STOP PRETENDING TO CRY AND...

[ HATTIE WHIMPERS ]

‐HOLD ON. ‐WHAT?

UH‐HUH.

WHAT?

WHY ARE YOU SO INTERESTED IN ME WEARING... THIS...

TO MY WEDDING?

UH, NO REASON, IT'S JUST A REALLY NICE DRESS.

YOU UP TO SOMETHING.

NO, I'M NOT.

I KNOW YOU, HATTIE MAE.

YES, YOU ARE.

WELL, WILL YOU AT LEAST CONSIDER IT?

PLEASE.

NO, MA'AM.

DON'T THROW MY DRESS LIKE THAT.

SOMEBODY WILL WEAR IT.

I COULD MAKE ME A NICE PAIR OF CURTAINS.

I DO.

I'LL MAKE 'EM AFTER YOU WEAR IT, HEAR NOW?

[ KNOCK ON DOOR ]

WHO IS IT?

Man: LAND SHARK.

I AIN'T GOT NOTH'N F'YA.

HATTIE, IT'S ME, FLOYD!

WELL, COME ON IN, FLOYD! THE DOOR O'.

ALL RIGHT.

‐HEY. ‐HEY.

OH, MY DAMN!

WHY?

WHAT THE HELL YOU GOT ON?

AIN'T THAT NICE?

IT'S MY OLD WEDDING DRESS.

IT'S BLACK.

‐I KNOW. ‐YEAH...

AND I KNOW WHY, TOO.

[ LAUGHS ] YEAH, YOU KNEW ME BACK IN THE DAY.

[ LAUGHS ] YEAH.

‐[ HATTIE LAUGHS ] ‐WHEW!

‐WHY YOU COMIN' OVER, FLOYD? ‐LOOK HERE, I BROUGHT THIS HERE.

YEAH.

MM‐MM.

THIS...

THAT AIN'T NO BIRTHDAY CARD. YOU AIN'T GOTTA SHAKE IT.

THIS ALL THE MONEY WE MADE?!

YEP.

[ HATTIE WHIMPERS, FLOYD TUTS ]

FLOYD, THIS AIN'T ENOUGH MONEY!

IT NEVER IS!

YOU NEED TO MAKE SOME MORE MONEY, FLOYD.

WE ALL DO!

I COME ‐‐ I NEED SOME MORE MONEY RIGHT NOW!

WELL, WHY, THOUGH?

I JUST DO!

MAYBE I HAVE TO GO BACK TO MY OLD JOB.

COMIN' TO THE POLE, FORMERLY CINNAMON ROLL...

NOW JUST DAMN.

YOU KNOW AIN'T NOBODY GONNA PAY YOU TO SEE YOU STRIP NO MORE.

YOU DON'T KNOW THAT, FLOYD!

I WAS GOOD IN MY TIME.

YEAH, THAT'S WHEN THEY USED TO THROW QUARTERS.

LOOK, WHAT'S GOING ON WITH YOU?

LINDA COME TALK TO ME LAST NIGHT,

SAY SHE WANTED TO GET MARRIED.

AND SHE'S GONNA GET MARRIED RIGHT NOW.

OKAY, THAT'S GOOD. THAT'S A GOOD THING.

‐NO, THAT'S NOT! ‐AND WHY NOT, HATTIE?

'CAUSE I AIN'T GOT NO MONEY.

WELL, YOU KNOW WHAT?

YOU AIN'T EVEN GOTTA PAY FOR THE WEDDING.

THANK YOU, FLOYD.

YOU DIDN'T HAVE TO DO THAT, FLOYD.

UNH‐UH, UNH‐UH. NO, NO.

OH. OH, GOD. YOU SCRATCHED ME WITH THAT THING.

IT IS SO NICE OF YOU.

THANK ME FOR WHAT? NICE FOR ME TO WHAT?

YOU JUST OFFERED TO PAY FOR THE WEDDING.

NO, HELL, I DIDN'T! ARE YOU CRAZY?

I DON'T THINK SO.

NOW, YOU KNOW DAMN WELL

I AIN'T GOT NO MONEY TO PAY FOR NO WEDDING.

WELL, WHAT AM I GONNA DO, FLOYD?

HATTIE, PHILIP'S GONNA PAY FOR THE WEDDING.

PHILIP AIN'T GOT NO DAMN MONEY!

‐BUT HATTIE... ‐WHAT?

I JUST WANT TO DO SOMETHING NICE.

THIS ‐‐ THIS MY CHILD, MY ONLY CHILD.

SINCE WHEN YOU WANT TO DO SOMETHING NICE?

SINCE NOW, FLOYD.

YOU AIN'T NEVER WANT TO DO NOTHING NICE FOR LINDA.

WELL, I DO NOW, FLOYD.

‐HATTIE. ‐WHAT?

YOU KNOW WHAT? DON'T EVEN WORRY ABOUT IT, FLOYD.

WHAT'S ‐‐ WHAT'S GOTTEN INTO YOU?

JUST FORGET ABOUT IT, FLOYD. JUST DON'T EVEN WORRY ABOUT IT.

WELL, LOOK, YOU KNOW WHAT?

A LITTLE BIRDIE TOLD ME YOU MAY NEED TO ASK DANNY.

DANNY AIN'T GOT NO DAMN MONEY!

MM.

[ COUGHS ]

WELL, I HEARD HE GOT A PROMOTION.

HE DID?

YES, AND TAKE YOUR STINKY TAIL.

WELL, I NEED TO GO CALL THAT BABY, THEN.

♪♪♪♪

OKAY. AND THEN, WE HAVE ABOUT THREE OR FOUR MORE PROJECTS,

BUT IT SHOULD BE FINISHED BY MON‐‐

GUYS, I'M REALLY STARTING TO FEEL LIKE

I'M NOT A PART OF THE TEAM.

OKAY, OKAY! I'M SORRY!

TELL THAT TO SOMEONE ELSE.

YEAH ‐‐ WE'RE NOT LISTENING.

LA, LA, LA, LA, LA, LA, LA, LA, LA, LA, LA, LA!

I KNOW THAT MATING CALL.

YEAH, IT'S REAL GROWN‐UP.

WELL, LOOK, I ‐‐ I PROMISE, I DIDN'T DO IT ON PURPOSE.

YES, YOU DID.

LOOK, I'M SORRY THEY GAVE ME THE PROMOTION, OKAY?

BUT THEY DID, SO YOU TWO NEED TO STOP BEING JUST CHILDREN

AND JUST FORGIVE ME AND BE MY FRIEND AGAIN.

IS ‐‐ WHAT THE ‐‐ WHAT ‐‐? WHAT'S ‐‐ WHA ‐‐ WHA?

WHA!

ARE YOU A NINJA?

ARE YOU BEING SNIPPY WITH ME?

I'M JUST SAYIN'.

‐HEY, DANNY! ‐HEY, GRANDMA.

‐WHAT ARE YOU DOING HERE? ‐HEY!

I THINK ABOUT YOU ALL DAY.

JUST THOUGHT I'D BRING YOU A LITTLE LUNCH.

‐AW, THANK YOU. ‐YOU WELCOME.

WHY?

WHY, I JUST CAN'T BE NICE TO MY GRANDSON?

YEAH, OF COURSE YOU CAN!

BUT IT'S ONLY WHEN YOU WANT SOMETHIN'.

OH, DANNY, YOU'RE SUCH A KIDDER.

WELL, YOU BETTER BE NICE TO HIM

'CAUSE WE'RE NOT GONNA BE NICE TO HIM,

'CAUSE HE'S NOT BEING NICE TO US.

WELL, WHAT THE HELL? WHY ARE WE HERE?

WHAT HAPPENED?

DANNY CONVINCED US TO GO ON A WEEKEND TRIP TOGETHER ‐‐

WHICH WAS DREADFUL, BY THE WAY.

WHAT? SO I USED ALL THE BUBBLE BATH.

DOES IT TO ME ALL THE TIME.

ANYWAY, HE STAYED HERE,

HE WORKED, AND HE GOT A PROMOTION.

YOU GOT A PROMOTION.

‐YEAH. ‐AIN'T THAT NICE?

YEAH, HE TOOK IT RIGHT OUT FROM UNDER US.

NO, I DIDN'T, I TOLD YOU TWO I WAS GONNA STAY HOME.

YEAH, BUT YOU DIDN'T STAY HOME.

YOU WENT DOWN TO WORK ON A SATURDAY,

AND THEN CORPORATE JUST HAPPENED TO SHOW UP.

YEAH.

AIN'T GOD GOOD?

PRAISE HIM, DANNY!

PRAISE HIM, DANNY!

‐OOH. ‐THANK YOU.

‐THANK YOU. ‐THANK YOU.

‐THANK YOU. ‐THANK YOU! WHEW.

THANK HIM ONE MORE TIME, DANNY.

YOU GONNA GET YOUR DUE PROMOTION.

OOH. THERE WE GO.

DANNY, HOW MUCH MONEY YOU MAKE?

GRANDMA, YOU CAN'T JUST BRING A PRESENT

AND ASK SOMEBODY HOW MUCH MONEY THEY MAKE.

WELL, GRANDMA, I'M NOT TELLING YOU THAT.

YEAH... TELL HER! WE ALL WANT TO KNOW.

YEAH, WE ALL DO.

WELL, I'M NOT.

SO, GRANDMA, WHAT ARE YOU REALLY DOING HERE?

I NEED TO TALK TO YOU ABOUT A FEW THINGS.

OKAY.

I NEED TO TALK TO YOU ABOUT YOUR MAMA'S WEDDING.

YEAH?

I FIGURE, WITH YOUR NEW PROMOTION AND EVERYTHING,

YOU COULD PROBABLY HELP ME WITH THE WEDDING, PAY FOR IT.

S‐SAY WHAT?

I NEED A LITTLE HELP. I CAN'T DO IT ALONE.

GRANDMA, I AIN'T GOT IT.

YOU DON'T EVEN KNOW HOW MUCH I NEED!

WELL, IT DON'T REALLY MATTER THE AMOUNT.

I AIN'T GOT IT.

AND HOW DO YOU KNOW THAT, DANNY?

WELL, IF YOU MUST KNOW,

WHEN I GOT THE PROMOTION, I DIDN'T GET A RAISE.

YOU AIN'T GET NO RAISE?!

WHAT?!

NO RAISE, EH?

OH...

THEY ALWAYS IN PEOPLE'S BUSINESS LIKE THAT?

MM‐HMM.

DANNY, YOU JUST GOT DUPED ‐‐ PART THREE!

YES, HE DID.

‐NO, I DIDN'T. ‐YES, YOU DID.

BABY BOY, ANY TIME PEOPLE CONVINCE YOU TO WORK MORE HOURS

BUT YOU DON'T GET MORE MONEY,

YOU'VE BEEN DUPED.

I'M SO GLAD WE WEREN'T HERE.

‐ME TOO. ‐HE'S AN IDIOT!

‐YEAH. ‐NO, I'M NOT.

HEY! YOU'RE MY IDIOT... BUT YOU'RE STILL AN IDIOT.

THANKS. BUT NO, I'M NOT.

AM I, GRANDMA?

I'M AFRAID SO, SPORT.

YOU'RE A DAMN IDIOT.

YOU NEVER LET NOBODY WORK YOU LIKE THAT

WITHOUT GIVING YOU A RAISE!

YEAH, YOU'RE RIGHT.

I KNOW.

ALL RIGHT, WELL, I'LL JUST CALL THEM

AND TELL THEM I DON'T WANT THE PROMOTION.

MM, NO, HELL, YOU AIN'T GONNA DO THAT.

YOU CALL 'EM AND TELL THEM YOU WANT THE MONEY

THAT COMES WITH THE PROMOTION.

RIGHT.

THAT'S ‐‐ THAT'S WHAT I'M GONNA DO.

‐RIGHT. ‐NICE. GOOD LUCK WITH THAT.

YOU'LL BE WORKING AT THAT DAMN DINER IN NO TIME.

I HEARD Y'ALL LOOKING FOR A NEW CHEF.

YOU NEED TO COME GET YOU A SALMON OR TWO, DREW.

NOT A CHANCE.

GO AHEAD, DANNY. GO AHEAD AND CALL 'EM.

‐GRANDMA! ‐WHAT?

WHY NOW?

'CAUSE I NEED TO KNOW IF YOU'RE GONNA HELP ME

PAY FOR THIS WEDDING.

LOOK, EVEN IF I GET THE RAISE, YOU KNOW,

I WON'T SEE THE MONEY FOR A WHILE.

WELL, I GUESS I JUST HAVE TO

TAKE OUT A LOAN OR SOMETHING, THEN.

‐ON WHAT? ‐ON MY CAR TITLE.

OOH, NO, GRANDMA. THOSE LOANS ARE BAD BUSINESS.

AND THAT DEUCE AND A QUARTER...

IS WORTH LESS THAN A QUARTER.

YEAH, BUT THOSE CAR TITLE LOANS, THEY'RE BAD.

‐TRUST ME. ‐YEAH.

I REALLY DON'T THINK IT'S A GOOD IDEA.

HONESTLY, THEY'LL GIVE YOU THE MONEY,

BUT THEN YOU HAVE TO PAY THE ENTIRE BALANCE.

AND IF YOU DON'T, WELL, THEY'LL TAKE YOUR CAR.

NOT THAT I KNOW FROM PERSONAL EXPERIENCE OR ANYTHING.

I JUST READ IT, OR SOMETHING.

WE'LL FIGURE OUT SOMETHING.

GO AHEAD AND CALL THEM, THEN. GO AHEAD.

OKAY, I'LL ‐‐ I'LL CALL THEM AFTER WORK.

YOU PROMISE?

YES, AND THEN I'LL CALL YOU WHEN I GET HOME.

‐YOU PROMISE? ‐YES, GRANDMA.

‐OKAY. ‐OKAY.

‐OKAY, GREAT. ‐OKAY, GREAT.

ALL RIGHT. GUESS I'M GOING TO THE HOUSE.

‐OKAY. YOU GO ON HOME. ‐YEAH.

‐I LOVE YOU. ‐I LOVE YOU MORE, DANNY.

KISS NOISE.

[ KISSES ]

‐BYE, BABY. ‐BYE.

SO, YOU DIDN'T GET A RAISE?

WHAT WERE WE SO WORRIED ABOUT?

[ BOTH LAUGHING ]

I DON'T KNOW.

‐I... ‐I DON'T KNOW.

♪♪♪♪

‐HEY, DANNY. ‐HEY, GRANDMA.

HEY. DID YOU GET YOUR RAISE?

NO.

‐I'M SORRY. ‐IT'S OKAY.

SAID HE'LL RE‐EVALUATE IN SIX MONTHS.

THAT'S SOME STRAIGHT‐UP BULL‐‐

NO, MM‐MM‐MM!

THAT'S JUST THEIR WAY OF NOT WANTING TO GIVE YOU THAT RAISE.

NO, IT'S NOT.

YES, IT IS! I HAVE A DINER.

GRANDMA, YOU'VE NEVER GIVEN ANYBODY A RAISE.

NOBODY EVER DESERVED A RAISE.

WELL, I HOPE YOU'RE WRONG.

WELL, I DON'T THINK SO IN THIS CASE.

BUT WHAT ARE WE GONNA DO?

HOW ARE WE GONNA GET THE MONEY UP TO PAY FOR HER WEDDING?

MAMA, IS THAT WHAT THIS IS ALL ABOUT?

WHAT?

THAT'S WHY YOU WANT ME TO WEAR YOUR HIDEOUS DRESS...

AND HAVE MY RECEPTION AT YOUR DUSTY DINER.

I DON'T KNOW WHAT YOU'RE TALKING ABOUT.

MM‐MM.

AND MY DINER IS NOT DUSTY, AND MY DRESS IS NOT HIDEOUS.

WELL, MAMA, YOU CAN KEEP YOUR DRESS AND YOUR DINER,

BECAUSE PHILIP IS PAYING FOR OUR WEDDING.

HE IS?!

‐YES. ‐REALLY?

YES, MAMA.

WELL, WAIT, I THOUGHT THE BRIDE'S FAMILY

‐IS SUPPOSED TO ‐‐ ‐BOY, GET YOUR MOUTH OFF THAT.

GET YOUR MOUTH OFF THAT! GET YOUR MOUTH OFF THAT!

PHILIP IS TAKING CARE OF IT.

I KNEW I LIKED HIM.

YEAH, HE SAID HE DIDN'T WANT IT TO BE A BURDEN ON ANYONE,

SO HE'S ‐‐ HE'S DOING IT.

THAT'S SO BEAUTIFUL.

YOU GOT YOURSELF A GOOD MAN.

♪♪♪♪

SO... STOP WORRYING, MAMA.

OH, I WASN'T REALLY WORRIED.

YES, YOU WERE.

BOY, SHUT THE HELL UP.

YOU CAN STILL WEAR THAT DRESS, THOUGH, LINDA.

NO, SHE CAN'T ‐‐ THAT THING IS UGLY AND IT'S BLACK.

AND IF YOU DON'T SHUT THE HELL UP,

YOU GONNA BE UGLY, BLACK AND BLUE!

WELL, YOU'RE GONNA BE OLD STILL.

AND YOU'RE GONNA BE STUPID, DANNY.

I'M NOT STUPID, MY MOM SAYS I'M AS SMART AS I THINK I CAN BE.

THAT'S RIGHT, BABY.

AND SHE AGREED WITH IT.

GOD HELP THE CHILDREN.