Original subtitles

LINDA?

COME ON, BABE, GET UP. GET A MOVE ON.

OH. [ GRUNTS ]

HEY.

WHAT'S WRONG WITH YOU?

I'M NOT FEELING WELL.

OH, HELL. HOLD ON, BABE. HOLD ON.

STAND UP. GET UP.

WHAT? WHAT? W‐WHAT?

[ SPRITZING ] UGH!

[ COUGHING ]

WHAT ARE YOU DOING?

JUST CLEANING THE AIR.

YOU KNOW I CAN'T AFFORD TO GET SICK.

MAMA, I'M NOT CONTAGIOUS.

THAT'S WHAT THAT MAN IN THE BIBLE SAID,

AND EVERYBODY ON THAT BOAT...

THE BIBLE? YEAH.

YOU KNOW YOU DON'T READ NO BIBLE.

GIRL, I READ MY BIBLE EVERY DAY.

WHAT MAN, MAMA?

BONDERAYMOND.

WHO?

BONDERAYMOND. YOU KNOW, THAT WAS ‐‐

THAT WAS USHER, UH, GREAT‐GREAT‐GREAT GRANDDAD.

YOU KNOW, HE WAS ON THAT BOAT WITH NOAH AN' THEM.

WHAT, WHAT, WHAT?

HE WAS ON THAT BOAT WITH NOAH AN' THEM.

AND HE HAD THE LEPROSY.

AND THEN ‐‐ W‐‐HE HAD WHAT?

THE LEPROSY.

AND THEN ‐‐ AND THEN ALL THEM ANIMALS WAS ON THERE,

AND ‐‐ AND PETER, PAUL, LUKE, AND RAYMOND...

AND RONNIE, BOBBY, RICKY, AND RINGO...

AND THEN WHEN ‐‐ WHEN BONDERAYMOND GOT ON THAT BOAT

AND HE HAD THAT LEPROSY,

AN' ALL THEM ‐‐ EVERYBODY GOT SICK.

YOU KNOW, THAT'S HOW THE DINOSAURS DIED.

READ THE BIBLE SOMETIMES AND YOU'LL LEARN.

SOMETIMES YOU NEED TO READ.

I WISH SOMETHING WOULD HAPPEN TO THIS DINOSAUR.

WHAT YOU SAY, BABE?

MY STOMACH... OH!

IS SO SORE.

OH! WELL, NOW, LINDA, YOU KNOW HI GOT TOO MANY THINGS TO DO.

I CAN'T AFFORD TO GET SICK.

MAMA, I'M NOT COUGHING OR ANYTHING.

WELL, WHAT KIND OF SICKNESS YOU GOT?

I'M NAUSEOUS. I THINK I ATE SOMETHING.

BUT YOU ATE AT THE DINER LAST NIGHT.

I KNOW.

LINDA, YOU RECKON I GOT A BAD BOTCH OF MEAT?

A BAD WHAT?

A BAD BOTCH OF MEAT.

SOMETHIN'.

OH, NO! OH, NO, LINDA!

THIS HERE CAN'T HAPPEN ANOTHER TIME TO ME!

WHAT? OOH, NO.

OH, NO, NO, NO. THIS CAN'T GO...

IN THE BEGINNING, WHEN ‐‐ WHEN GOD CREATED ‐‐

I MEAN, IN THE ‐‐ IN THE BEGINNING,

WHEN I FIRST OPENED UP MY DINER...

'CAUSE THAT WAS IN THE BIBLE, TOO?

YEAH.

AND ‐‐ AND THE PEOPLE OF THE TOWN

STARTED TO COMPLAIN,

AND...

AND I ALMOST LOST MY DINER.

I CAN'T LET THAT THERE HAPPEN TO ME AGAIN.

MAMA, CALM DOWN. I'M SURE IT'S FINE.

IT'S PROBABLY JUST ME. I NEED TO GO TO THE DOCTOR.

YOU FEEL THAT BAD?

YEAH, I DO.

OH, NO. [ GASPS ]

WAIT A DAMN MINUTE.

WHAT?

I'M‐A BEAT THE HELL OUTTA FLOYD,

'CAUSE HE THE ONE BROUGHT THAT BAD BOTCH OF MEAT UP IN THERE.

HE GOT IT FOR HIMSELF, GOT IT FOR THE LOW‐LOW,

AND I TOLD HIM "NO‐NO" RIGHT THEN.

I'M‐A BEAT HIS ASS.

[ SIGHS ]

FLOYD!

WHAT IS IT NOW, SIR?

MNH!

I GOT YOUR "SIR."

GRANDMA, WHAT'S WRONG?

FLOYD'S MEAT.

MNH‐MNH. OHH.

OKAY, IS THIS A CONVERSATION

THAT'S GONNA MAKE ME LOSE MY APPETITE?

[ imitating Drew ] OKAY, DID YOU HAVE ANY OF THE STEAKS

THAT WAS BACK IN THE BACK?

UH, YEAH.

THEN, UH, YEAH.

[ Normal voice ] ON MY DAMN NERVES.

SO WHAT'S WRONG WITH IT?

I TOLD YOU I DIDN'T WANT THAT DISCOUNTED MEAT IN HERE,

AND YOU BROUGHT IT IN HERE ANYWAY!

WELL, WHAT'S WRONG WITH IT?

IT'S CONTAMINATION!

IT'S WHAT?

IT'S IMPECTION!

IT'S...IT'S WHAT?

IT'S INBACTERIATION!

GRAMMAR WASN'T YOUR STRONG SUBJECT, WAS IT?

AND NEITHER WAS GLAMOUR FOR YOU.

LOOK, JUST KEEP YOUR VOICE DOWN IN HERE.

DID ANY OF THESE CUSTOMERS COMPLAIN

ABOUT BEING SICK OFF OF THIS MEAT?

NO! YOU SURE?

YES!

EXCUSE ME, LADIES AND GENTLEMEN,

DOES ANYBODY GOT SICK OFF OF THE MEAT IN THIS ESTABLISHMENT?

FLOYD, ARE YOU GONNA STOP HER?

WHY? CAN'T NOBODY UNDERSTAND WHAT THE HELL SHE SAYING ANYWAY.

DREW, HOW YOU FEEL? YOU FEEL ALL RIGHT?

I FEEL LIKE A SAVAGE FOR EATING HERE.

DANNY, YOU ‐‐ YOU, BABY, HOW YOU FEEL?

I JUST HAD THE BURGER.

YEAH. ME, TOO.

I DON'T UNDERSTAND. I WAS ALL THE SAME BOTCH.

AND I FEEL FINE.

SO DO I.

ME, TOO...FOR NOW.

KEEP TALKING, DREW.

WHAT'S GOING ON? LINDA ATE SOME OF

THAT BAD BOTCH OF MEAT THAT YOU BROUGHT IN HERE,

AND SICK AS ‐‐ SHE WAS SICK AS A DOG THIS MORNING.

WAS SHE? YEAH!

AW. I NEED TO CALL HER.

BOY, SIT DOWN. SHE WENT TO THE DOCTOR.

WAS SHE OKAY?

I JUST SAID SHE WAS SICK!

WELL, I SHOULD GO WITH HER.

SIT YOUR ASS DOWN.

YOUR MAMA A GROWN WOMAN.

GRANDMA, YOU STRONGER THAN A BAD BOTCH OF MEAT.

YOU KNOW WHAT?

LINDA DIDN'T EAT FROM THAT BAD BOTCH ‐‐ MM.

BATCH OF MEAT.

SHE ATE FROM THE OLD BATCH...

BATCH.

YOU TALKING 'BOUT THE ONE I BOUGHT?

YES.

OH, NO.

YEAH. I THINK WE REALLY SHOULD THROW THAT MEAT AWAY.

THE HELL YOU PREACH?!

MAMA HATTIE, PEOPLE WILL GET SICK.

AND DIE. RIGHT.

WELL, THAT'S JUST A CHANCE I'M GON' HAVE TO TAKE.

DO YOU KNOW HOW MUCH 178 POUNDS OF HARD, COLD BEEF COSTS?

ABOUT 12 OUNCES OF VANILLA MASSAGE OIL?

MNH.

SHUT UP, SAM!

YOU WENT PAST THE GUTTER

TO A QUARTER TO DISGUSTING.

I'M GLAD YOU ALL KNOW ME SO WELL.

YES, WE DO, AND FROM NOW ON,

WE SHOULD ALL JUST CALL HIM BY HIS SCIENTIFIC NAME ‐‐

DISEASE.

HATTIE, SERIOUSLY, YOU NEED TO THROW THAT MEAT AWAY.

UNH‐UNH!

I'M‐A TAKE THAT MEAT BACK THERE IN THAT BACK AND WASH IT OFF.

WASH IT?!

YEAH! WITH SOME ANTIBACTERIAL SOAP.

OHH.

YOU CAN'T DO THAT.

WATCH ME.

WHY DO WE EAT IN THIS BATCH?

HOMEGIRL DON'T EVEN WEAR A HAIRNET!

THAT HAIR DON'T COME OUT.

THAT'S A ONE‐PIECE.

BATCH, PLEASE. FOOD'S CHEAP.

NO, YOU'RE CHEAP.

FOR SOME.

I CAN'T BELIEVE SHE JUST SAID

THAT SHE'S GOING TO WASH THIS MEAT.

AND COOK THE HELL OUT OF IT.

HATTIE, YOU CAN'T DO THAT.

YOU KNOW WHAT, FLOYD?

FROM NOW ON, WE GON' CHANGE THIS HERE MENU.

WE GON' TELL EVERYBODY

THAT THE MEAT IS GONNA BE COOKED WELL‐WELL‐WELL DONE.

YOU GOT THAT?

STARTING NOW. ALL RIGHT, EVERYBODY.

GOT SOME MEAT?

TAKE IT BACK IN THE BACK AND RECOOK IT OVER FOR YOU.

I'LL BRING IT BACK. UGH.

I'M JUST GONNA THROW IT ON THE GRILL FOR Y'ALL,

MAKE SURE I... [ SPEAKS INDISTINCTLY ]

EXCUSE ME, MA'AM.

HATTIE.

ALL RIGHT, EVERYBODY, I'LL BRING IT ALL BACK TO YOU

WHEN WE GET IT RE‐WARMED UP FOR YA.

HERE! THROW THAT ON THE GRILL FOR ME.

ALL RIGHT, IT'LL BE DONE IN A MINUTE.

HEY, BABY.

HEY.

HEY, MAMA. I HEARD YOU WEREN'T FEELING WELL.

NO, I'M NOT.

WELL, WHAT'S WRONG WITH YOU?

I'M NAUSEOUS. MM.

WELL, WHAT DID THE DOCTOR SAY?

WELL...[ SIGHS ]

I KNOW, BABE. DON'T WORRY ABOUT IT.

HE SAID YOU GOT A BAD BOTCH OF MEAT.

WELL, MAMA, IT'S...[ SIGHS ] NOT THE BAD BOTCH.

WELL ‐‐ WELL, WHAT IS IT, BABE?

OH, NO!

[ SNIFFLES ]

YOU'LL BE GOING UP TO THE... [ SPEAKS INDISTINCTLY ]

[ CRIES ] HOW LONG THEY GIVE YOU?

ABOUT NINE MONTHS.

OHH! [ SOBS ] [ SOBS ]

YOU DONE GOT BUT NINE MONTHS TILL THE END, BABE?

NO.

I'M PREGNANT.

[ THUD ]

GET YOUR GIRLY BUTT UP!

[ GRUNTS ]

[ GROANS ] ATTABOY. ATTABOY.

GET OFF OF ME!

[ BLOWS AIR ] NOW YOU WANNA REPEAT THAT?

I'M PREGNANT.

WITH WHAT?

FLOYD.

I MEAN, SHE MUST BE PREGNANT WITH POSSIBILITIES.

[ LAUGHS ] [ CHUCKLES ]

SHE CAN'T POSSIBLY BE PREGNANT WITH A BABY. [ LAUGHS ]

THE BABY'S GONNA BE IN COLLEGE WHEN HE COMES OUT.

[ LAUGHS ] [ LAUGHS ]

I MEAN, REALLY. SHE KNOW SHE AIN'T PREGNANT.

GO ON, Y'ALL. LAUGH.

WE ARE.

[ LAUGHTER ]

YOU ‐‐ YOU GOTTA LOVE 'EM.

THEY'RE RIGHT.

I'M HERE ALL WEEK.

SO WAIT A MINUTE. LINDA?

YOU HEARD ME, MAMA.

I KNOW THAT,

BUT SOMETHING'S JUST NOT SITTIN' RIGHT WITH THIS.

I'M PREGNANT.

ARE THEY SURE?

YEP.

YOU KNOW, SOMETHING'S NOT RIGHT ABOUT THIS.

WHAT DO YOU MEAN, BABY?

I MEAN YOUR BEING... [ Lowered voice ] PREGNANT.

MISS LINDA, YOUR DAUGHTER ‐‐ MM!

I'M SORRY. I MEAN, YOUR SON...

IS 24 YEARS OLD,

AND HE JUST MOVED OUT THE HOUSE.

NOW YOU WANNA HAVE ANOTHER BABY?

SORRY, BUT THAT'S KIND OF A LONG WAIT. [ LAUGHS ]

I WASN'T WAITING.

OH.

SO YOU, UH, YOU WANTED THIS TO HAPPEN. HMM.

NO. GETTING PREGNANT WAS A MISTAKE.

BUT A HAPPY ONE.

WILL SOMEBODY MOVE THE FLOWER CHILD?

IT'S ‐‐

BEFORE...

BEFORE I MAKE PASTRY OUT OF HER.

FINE, I'LL JUST STAND NEXT TO

THE GUY THAT I WANT TO IMPREGNATE ME.

[ LAUGHS ]

Floyd: MM.

SO YOU'RE REALLY SERIOUS, HUH?

YEAH, SHE IS.

GIRL, I MEAN, YOU PREGNANT?

YES, UNCLE FLOYD!

WOW.

SHOULD WE CALL THE GUINNESS BOOK OF WORLD RECORDS OR SOMETHING?

I DON'T KNOW HOW THIS...

I'M ONLY 40. Floyd: [ STIFLES LAUGH ]

I KNOW 40, BUT...

[ Goofy voice ] HAVING A BABY!

[ LAUGHS ]

I MEAN, DON'T YOU REALLY HAVE TO ADMIT IT NOW,

THAT'S A LITTLE LATE, LINDA?

YOU TWO ABOUT TO BE LATE IF YOU KEEP TALKING ABOUT MY MAMA.

YOUR MAMA ALREADY LATE, EVIDENTLY.

[ LAUGHS ] [ LAUGHS ]

LOOK AT HATTIE.

SHE'S IN SHOCK.

RIGHT?

AND I LIKE IT.

I HAVE NEVER SEEN HER SO QUIET.

I KNOW!

I THINK I LIKE IT, TOO.

I'M GONNA ENJOY THIS.

[ Singsongy ] HATTIE.

HATTIE.

CAR WASH!

THE HELL WAS SHE?

UM, HATTIE,

DID YOU HEAR HER?

UH, YEAH, I HEARD IT.

DID YOU HEAR THAT SHE SAID SHE WAS PREGNANT?

I KNOW, FLOYD.

Floyd: OKAY.

I MEAN... ARE YOU OKAY WITH THAT?

I MEAN, YOU'RE JUST SITTING THERE ALL QUIET AND EVERYTHING.

I KNOW, FLOYD.

ARE YOU IN THE SAME ROOM WITH HER?

YOU SAID WHAT NOW?

STOP IT.

LINDA, YOU PREGNANT?

MAMA, I'M JUST AS SHOCKED AS YOU ARE.

OKAY, NOW WAIT. EVERYONE JUST HOLD ON AND CALM DOWN.

NOW, MOM, I HAVE NEWS FOR YOU.

YOU CAN'T GET PREGNANT IF YOU DON'T HAVE A BIRD AND A BEE.

I KNOW HOW THIS WORKS, BABY.

YOU HAD SEX?

YEAH. Y ‐‐

[ GROANS ] [ THUD ]

Sam: OOH! DANNY!

YES?

WAS IT YOUR BREATH?

I'M‐A WHUP YOUR ASS, MAMA. [ GRUNTS ]

WHOA! WHOA! WHOA! HEY! NO! HEY!

SORRY. UM...

WHO'D YOU SLEEP WITH?

I DON'T WANNA TALK ABOUT HIM RIGHT NOW.

IT'S WILL?

DANNY...

I CAN'T BELIEVE YOU'RE REALLY PREGNANT.

THIS IS CRAZY! CRAZY!

YOU'RE GONNA BE A BIG BRO AND A GRANDPA AT THE SAME TIME.

[ WHINES ]

LINDA.

MAMA, CAN YOU SAY SOMETHING TO ME OTHER THAN MY NAME?

[ Voice breaks ] LINDA.

WHAT?

ARE THEY ‐‐ IS HE SURE?

YEAH, I TOOK THE TEST THREE TIMES, AND...

THEN I WENT AND...

GOT SOME TESTS. OOH.

[ GRUNTS ]

AND... Floyd and Sam: UGH.

Drew and Sam: UGH. Floyd: MNH.

Drew: UM...YOU...

Floyd: UGH. LOOK AT THIS. UGH!

YOU...NO!

YEAH.

AND THEY'RE ALL POSITIVE.

[ CLICKS TONGUE ] UM...MNH. LINDA...

MNH‐MNH!

UM...DIDN'T YOU PEE ON THOSE?

INFECTED MEAT!

URINE SAMPLES!

WHAT KIND OF PLACE IS THIS?!

I JUST CAN'T BELIEVE IT.

BABY...

NEITHER CAN I.

NEITHER CAN I. YOU'RE SO OLD!

[ GASPS ]

SAM ‐‐

SAM SORRY.

MAMA, DOES WILL KNOW ABOUT THIS?

IT AIN'T WILL.

[ GASPS ] MAMA!

DANNY.

IT'S FWLIP.

MAMA!

WHAT?

FLIP! I MEAN ‐‐

YEAH. THERE. YOU SAID IT RIGHT THERE.

THAT'S COOL. WE HEARD IT.

I DIDN'T WANT THEM TO KNOW.

Floyd: [ SCOFFS ]

WELL, HELL, EVERYBODY GONNA KNOW IN A FEW MONTHS.

BUT I WANTED TO BE THE ONE TO TELL PHILIP.

I DIDN'T WANT HIM TO FIND IT OUT FROM ANYONE ELSE.

THEN GO CALL HIM!

YEAH. NO! TEXT HIM.

WHAT?

IT'S THE BEST WAY TO SEND BAD NEWS.

GOOD IDEA.

OKAY. THIS ISN'T BAD NEWS.

MISS LINDA, FLIP IS FINE.

GIRL, Y'ALL ABOUT TO HAVE SOME BEAUTIFUL BABY!

YOU GONNA BE A GOOD MOTHER, GIRL.

SHUT UP, LITTLE GIRL.

JEEZ.

SOMEONE'S A LITTLE...TESTY.

[ LAUGHS ]

MY BAD FOR TRYING TO MAKE THE MAMA/GRANDMA FEEL BETTER.

I WAS REALLY HOPING THIS WAS A MISTAKE.

YEAH.

WELL, YOU HAVE BEEN SICK THE LAST FEW MORNINGS.

I KNOW.

LINDA.

WHAT?

YOU ARE PREGNANT.

YEAH, AND ONLY FROM THAT ONE TIME.

IT ONLY TAKES ONE TIME...

GENIUS.

RIGHT. WELL, I'M GONNA GET READY TO GO AND GO HOME.

YEAH.

BUT LISTEN,

I DON'T WANT ANY OF Y'ALL

TO SAY ANYTHING TO PHILIP.

[ ALL TALKING AT SAME TIME ]

Sam: THESE LIPS DO SOME THINGS, BUT THEY DON'T TELL SECRETS.

Drew: I'M TRUSTWORTHY. LIKE, I'M NOT ‐‐ YOU KNOW, I APPRECIATE...

I DON'T SPILL SECRETS. I WON'T DO THAT.

NOTHING. YEAH.

I DON'T BE TELLING NOBODY'S BUSINESS.

MAMA, DON'T WORRY.

YEAH, YOU, UH, YOU GO ON AND GET SOME REST.

OKAY? YOU TAKE CARE OF THAT LITTLE BABY BUMP RIGHT HERE.

I MEAN, YOU ARE STARTING TO SHOW, RIGHT?

Sam: OHH. OR ‐‐

OR IS THIS, LIKE... Sam: MNH‐MNH.

LIKE, YOUR NORMAL SITUATION?

'CAUSE... MNH‐MNH.

I MEAN, SHE WAS ALWAYS... I MEAN, WHEN ‐‐

MM! HOLD ME BACK, BABY!

MNH! UNH‐UNH.

I'M TELLING YOU TO JUST SHUT IT UP.

Danny: UNH‐UNH.

LINDA, GO ON NOW. GET READY. GO AHEAD, GET READY.

GET READY TO GO. I'M‐A HURT HER.

NO. PLEASE!

CAN I WATCH?

MOVE!

OOH! WHOO!

HEY, Y'ALL.

HEY.

PHILIP.

LINDA. HOW ARE YOU?

I'M GOOD.

GOOD.

SO...WHO'S THE BEAUTIFUL BOWLHEAD YOU GOT HERE?

THAT BOY LOVE HIM A BIGHEAD WOMAN.

THIS IS SARAH.

I THOUGHT I'D BRING HER BY SO THAT YOU ALL COULD MEET HER.

AND WHO IS SHE? WHAT HAPPENED TO THE OTHER GIRL?

[ MOUTHS WORD ]

WELL, WE JUST MET, BUT WE HIT IT OFF REALLY GOOD.

ACTUALLY, GREAT.

AND WHAT ABOUT MY MAMA?

DANNY, YOUR MOTHER HAS MADE IT VERY CLEAR TO ME

THAT SHE DOESN'T WANNA BE WITH ME.

ISN'T THAT RIGHT, LINDA?

RIGHT.

SO THIS IS ME MOVING ON,

DATING OTHER WOMEN.

I'M GOING HOME. Hattie: LINDA.

EXCUSE ME, BIGFOOT.

[ CLEARS THROAT ]

I'LL SEE Y'ALL LATER.

WHAT THE HELL?!