All language subtitles for Cats_(1998) ,BR_MKV_H264_AC3[5.1](ReallyUsefulFilms,Eng) 1280x736

Cats_(1998) ,BR_MKV_H264_AC3[5.1](ReallyUsefulFilms,Eng) 1280x736

# Are you blind when you're born?

# Can you see in the dark?

# Can you look at a king?
# Would you sit on his throne?

# Can you say of your bite
That it's worse than your bark?

# Are you cock of the walk

# When you're walking alone?

# Because Jellicles are
And Jellicles do

# Jellicles do and Jellicles would

# Jellicles would and Jellicles can

# Jellicles can and Jellicles do

# When you fall on your head
Do you land on your feet?

# Are you tense when you sense
There's a storm in the air?

# Can you find your way blind
When you're lost in the street?

# Do you know how to go
To the Heaviside Layer?

# Because Jellicles can
And Jellicles do

# Jellicles do and Jellicles can

# Jellicles can and Jellicles do

# Jellicles do and Jellicles can

# Jellicles can and Jellicles do

# Can you ride on a broomstick
To places far distant?

# Familiar with candle
# With book and with bell?

# Were you Whittington's friend?
# The Pied Piper's assistant?

# Have you been an alumnus
Of heaven and hell?

# Are you mean like a minx?
# Are you lean like a lynx?

# Are you keen to be seen
When you're smelling a rat?

# Were you there when the pharaohs
Commissioned the Sphinx?

# If you were, and you are
You're a Jellicle Cat

# Jellicle Songs for Jellicle Cats

# Jellicle Songs for Jellicle Cats

# Jellicle Songs for Jellicle Cats

# Jellicle Songs for Jellicle Cats
Jellicle Songs for Jellicle Cats

# We can dive through the air

# Like a flying trapeze

# We can turn double somersaults
Bounce on a tyre

# We can run up a wall
We can swing through the trees

# We can balance on bars
We can walk on a wire

# Jellicles can and Jellicles do

# Jellicles can and Jellicles do

# Jellicles can and Jellicles do

# Jellicles can and Jellicles do

# Jellicle Songs for Jellicle Cats

# Jellicle Songs for Jellicle Cats

# Jellicle Songs for Jellicle Cats

# Jellicle Songs for Jellicle Cats

# Can you sing at the same time
In more than one key

# Duets by Rossini
And waltzes by Strauss?

# And can you, as cats do
Begin with a "c"?

# That always triumphantly
Brings down the house

# Jellicle Cats
Are queens of the night

# Singing at astronomical heights

# Handling pieces from The Messiah

# Hallelujah, angelical choir

# Jellicle Cats
Are queens of the night

# Singing at astronomical heights

# Handling pieces from The Messiah

# Hallelujah, angelical choir

# The mystical divinity

# Of unashamed felinity

# Round the cathedral

# Rang vivat

# Life to the everlasting cat

# Feline, fearless

# Faithful and true

# To others who do what

# Jellicles do and Jellicles can

# Jellicles can and Jellicles do

# Jellicle Cats sing Jellicle Chants

# Jellicles old and Jellicles new

# Jellicle Song and Jellicle dance

# Jellicle Songs for Jellicle Cats

# Jellicle Songs for Jellicle Cats

# Jellicle Songs for Jellicle Cats

# Jellicle Songs for Jellicle Cats

# Practical cats, dramatical cats

# Pragmatical cats, fanatical cats

# Oratorical cats,
Delphic-Oracle cats

# Sceptical cats, dyspeptical cats

# Romantical cats, pedantical cats

# Critical and parasitical cats

# Allegorical cats, metaphorical cats

# Statistical cats and mystical cats

# Political cats, hypocritical cats

# Clerical cats, hysterical cats

# Cynical cats, rabbinical cats

# Jellicle Songs for Jellicle Cats

# Jellicle Songs for Jellicle Cats

# Jellicle Songs for Jellicle Cats

# Jellicle Songs for Jellicle Cats
Jellicle Songs for Jellicle Cats #

# There's a man over there
With a look of surprise

# As much as to say
Well, now, how about that?

# Do I actually see
With my own very eyes

# A man who's not heard
Of a Jellicle Cat?

# What's a Jellicle Cat?

# What's a Jellicle Cat?

# What's a Jellicle Cat?

# The naming of cats
Is a difficult matter

# It isn't just one
Of your holiday games

# You may think at first
I'm as mad as a hatter

# When I tell you a cat
Must have three different names

# First of all there's the name
That the family use daily

# Such as Peter, Augustus
Alonzo or James

# Such as Victor or Jonathan
George or Bill Bailey

# All of them
Sensible, everyday names

# There are fancier names
If you think they sound sweeter

# Some for the gentlemen
Some for the dames

# Such as Plato, Admetus
Electra, Demeter

# But all of them sensible
Everyday names

# But I tell you, a cat
Needs a name that's particular

# A name that's peculiar
And more dignified

# Else how can he keep up
His tail perpendicular

# Or spread out his whiskers
Or cherish his pride?

# Of names of this kind
I can give you a quorum

# Such as Munkustrap, Quaxo
Or Coricopat

# Such as Bombalurina
Or else, Jellylorum

# Names that never belong
To more than one cat

# But above and beyond
There's still one name left over

# And that is the name
That you never will guess

# The name that no human research
Can discover

# But the cat himself knows
And will never confess

# When you notice a cat
In profound meditation

# The reason, I tell you,
Is always the same

# His mind is engaged
In a rapt contemplation

# Of the thought, of the thought

# Of the thought of his name

# His ineffable

# Effable

# Effanineffable

# Deep and inscrutable

# Singular

# Name... Name... Name... Name... #

# Jellicle Cats come out tonight

# Jellicle Cats come one, come all

# The Jellicle Moon is shining bright

# Jellicles come to the Jellicle Ball

# Jellicle Cats come out tonight

# Jellicles come to the Jellicle Ball

# Jellicle Cats meet once a year

# At the Jellicle Ball
Where we all rejoice

# And the Jellicle Leader
Will soon appear

# And make what is known
As the Jellicle Choice

# When Old Deuteronomy
Just before dawn

# Through a silence you feel
You could cut with a knife

# Announces the cat
Who can now be reborn

# And come back to a different
Jellicle Life

# For waiting up there
Is the Heaviside Layer

# Full of wonders
One Jellicle only will see

# And Jellicles ask
Because Jellicles dare

# Who will it be?
# Who will it be? #

# I have a Gumbie Cat in mind

# Her name is Jennyanydots

# Her coat is of the tabby kind

# With tiger stripes
And leopard spots

# All day she sits beneath the stair

# Or on the steps or on the mat

# She sits and sits and sits and sits

# And that's what makes a Gumbie Cat

# That's what makes a Gumbie Cat

# But when the day's hustle
And bustle is done

# Then the Gumbie Cat's work
Is but hardly begun

# And when all the family's
In bed and asleep

# She tucks up her skirts
To the basement to creep

# She is deeply concerned
With the ways of the mice

# Their behaviour's not good
And their manners not nice

# So when she has got them
Lined up on the matting

# She teaches them
# Music, crocheting and tatting

# I have a Gumbie Cat in mind

# Her name is Jennyanydots

# The curtain cord she likes to wind

# And tie it into sailor knots

# She sits upon the window-sill

# Or anything that's smooth and flat

# She sits and sits and sits and sits

# And that's what makes a Gumbie Cat

# That's what makes a Gumbie Cat

# But when the day's hustle
And bustle is done

# Then the Gumbie Cat's work
Is but hardly begun

# She thinks that the cockroaches
Just need employment

# To prevent them from
Idle and wanton destroyment

# So she's formed from that lot
Of disorderly louts

# A troop of well-disciplined
Helpful boy scouts

# With a purpose in life
And a good deed to do

# And she's even created

# A beetles tattoo! #

(# Rule Britannia)

Squad salute!

# For she's
A jolly good fellow... #

Thank you, my dears

Miaow

Miaow

# The Rum Tum Tugger is a curious cat

# If you offer me pheasant
I'd rather have grouse

# If you put me in a house
I would much prefer a flat

# If you put me in a flat
Then I'd rather have a house

# If you set me on a mouse
Then I only want a rat

# If you set me on a rat
Then I'd rather chase a mouse

# The Rum Tum Tugger is a curious cat

# And there isn't any call
For me to shout it

# For he will do as he do do

# And there's no doing anything
About it

# The Rum Tum Tugger
Is a terrible bore

# When you let me in
Then I want to go out

# I'm always on the wrong side
Of every door

# And as soon as I get home
Then I'd like to get about

# I like to lie in a bureau drawer

# But I make such a fuss
If I can't get out

# The Rum Tum Tugger is a curious cat

# And there isn't any use
For you to doubt it

# For he will do as he do do

# And there's no doing
Anything about it

# The Rum Tum Tugger
Is a curious beast

# My disobliging ways
Are a matter of habit

# Now if you offer me fish
Then I always want a feast

# And if there isn't any fish
Then I won't eat rabbit

# If you offer me cream
Then I sniff and sneer

# For I only like
What I find for myself... No

# So you catch me in it up to my ears
And put it on the larder shelf

# The Rum Tum Tugger
Is artful and knowing

# The Rum Tum Tugger
Doesn't care for a cuddle

# So I'll on up into your sewing

# Cos there's nothing
I enjoy like a horrible muddle

# The Rum Tum Tugger is a curious cat

# The Rum Tum Tugger
Doesn't care for a cuddle

# The Rum Tum Tugger is a curious cat

# And there isn't any need
For me to spout it

# For he will do as he do do

# And there's no

# Doing anything

# About... #

(Miaowing)

# About... #

(Miaowing)

# About... #

(Screaming)

# About it #

# Remark the cat

# Who hesitates towards you

# In the light of the dawn

# Which opens on her

# Like a grin

# You see the border
Of her coat is torn

# And stained with sand

# And you see the corner of her eye

# Twist like a crooked pin

# She haunted many a low resort

# Near the grimy road
Of Tottenham Court

# She flitted about the no man's land

# From The Rising Sun
To The Friend at Hand

# And the postman sighed
As he scratched his head

# You'd really have thought
She'd ought to be dead

# And who would ever suppose

# That that

# Was Grizabella

# The Glamour Cat?

# Grizabella the Glamour Cat

# Grizabella the Glamour Cat

# Who would have ever supposed

# That that

# Was Grizabella

# The Glamour Cat? #

# Bustopher Jones
Is not skin and bones

# In fact, he's remarkably fat

# He doesn't haunt pubs
He has eight or nine clubs

# For he's the St James's Street Cat

# He's the cat we all greet
As he walks down the street

# In his coat of fastidious black

# No commonplace mousers
Have such well-cut trousers

# Or such an impeccable back

# In the whole of St James's
The smartest of names is

# The name of this Brummell of cats

# And we're all of us proud
To be nodded or bowed to

# By Bustopher Jones in white spats

# In the whole of St James's
The smartest of names is

# The name of this Brummell of cats

# And we're all of us proud
To be nodded or bowed to

# By Bustopher Jones
In white spats #

# My visits are occasional
To the Senior Educational

# And it is against the rules

# For any one cat
To belong both to that

# And the Joint Superior Schools

# For a similar reason
When game is in season

# I'm found not at Fox's, but Blimp's

# I am frequently seen
At the gay Stage and Screen

# Which is famous
For winkles and shrimps

# In the season of venison
I give my ben'son

# To the Pothunter's succulent bones

# And just before noon's
Not a moment too soon

# To drop in for a drink

# At the Drones

# When I'm seen in a hurry
There's probably curry

# At the Siamese or at the Glutton

# If I look full of gloom
Then I've lunched at the Tomb

# On cabbage, rice pudding

# And mutton

# In the whole of St James's
The smartest of names is

# The name of this Brummell of cats

# And we're all of us proud
To be nodded or bowed to

# By Bustopher Jones in white

# Bustopher Jones in white

# Bustopher Jones in white spats

# So much in this way
Passes Bustopher's day

# At one club or another he's found

# It can be no surprise
That under our eyes

# He has grown unmistakably round

# He's a twenty-five pounder
# Or I am a bounder

# And he's putting on weight
Every day

# But I'm so well-preserved
Because I've observed

# All me life a routine, and I'd say

# I am still in me prime
I shall last out me time

# That's the word
From this stoutest of cats

# It must and it shall
Be spring in Pall Mall

# While Bustopher Jones wears white

# Bustopher Jones wears white

# Bustopher Jones
Wears white spats #

Toodlepip!

(Thunder rolls)

(Police siren)

Macavity!

(Car brakes screech)

(Car accelerates away)

- (Woman laughs)
- Shh!

(Woman laughs)

# Mungojerrie
# And Rumpleteazer

# We're a notorious couple of cats

# As knockabout clowns
Quick-change comedians

# Tightrope walkers and acrobats

# We have an extensive reputation

# We make our home in Victoria Grove

# This is merely our centre
Of operation

# For we are incurably given to rove

# When the family assembles
For Sunday dinner

# Their minds made up
That they won't get thinner

# On Argentine joint
# Potatoes and greens

# And the cook would appear
From behind the scenes

# And say in a voice
That is broken with sorrow

# "I'm afraid you must wait
And have dinner tomorrow

# "The joint has gone
From the oven like that!"

# Then the family will say
"It's that horrible cat!

# "Was it Mungojerrie
# Or Rumpleteazer!"

# And most of the time
They leave it at that

# Mungojerrie and Rumpleteazer

# Have a wonderful way
Of working together

# And some of the time
You would say it was luck

# And some of the time
You would say it was weather

# We'd go through the house
Like a hurricane

# And no sober person
Could take his oath

# Was it Mungojerrie
# Or Rumpleteazer?

# Or could you have sworn
That it might have been both?

# And when you hear
A dining room smash

# Or up from the pantry
There comes a loud crash

# Or down from the library
Came a loud ping

# From a vase which was commonly

# Said to be Ming

# Then the family will say
"Now which was which cat?"

# It was Mungojerrie

# And Rumpleteazer

# And there's nothing at all
To be done about that

# And there's nothing at all
To be done about that #

Old Deuteronomy?

# I believe it is Old Deuteronomy

# Well, of all things

# Can it be really?

# Yes! No! Ho! Hi!
Oh, my eye!

# My mind may be wandering
But I confess

# I believe it is Old Deuteronomy

# Old Deuteronomy's lived a long time

# He's a cat who has lived
Many lives in succession

# He was famous in proverb
And famous in rhyme

# A long while before
Queen Victoria's accession

# Old Deuteronomy's buried nine wives

# And more - I am tempted
To say ninety-nine

# And his numerous progeny
Prospers and thrives

# And the village is proud of him
In his decline

# At the sight of that placid
And bland physiognomy

# When he sits in the sun

# On the vicarage wall

# The oldest inhabitant croaks

# Well, of all things

# Can it be really?

# Yes! No! Ho! Hi!
Oh, my eye!

# My mind may be wandering
But I confess

# I believe it is Old Deuteronomy

# Well, of all things

# Can it be really?

# Yes! No! Ho! Hi!
Oh, my eye!

# My mind may be wandering
But I confess

# I believe it is Old Deuteronomy

# Well, of all things
Can it be really?

# Yes! No! Ho! Hi!
Oh, my eye!

# My mind may be wandering
But I confess

# I believe it is Old Deuteronomy

# Well, of all things

# Can it be really?

# Yes! No! Ho! Hi!
Oh, my eye!

# My legs may be tottery
And I must go slow

# And be careful

# Of Old Deuteronomy #

# Jellicle Cats meet once a year

# On the night we make
The Jellicle Choice

# And now that the
Jellicle Leader is here

# Jellicle Cats can all rejoice

# Of the awe-full battle of the Pekes
And the Pollicles

# Together with some account

# Of the participation
Of the Pugs and the Poms

# And the intervention

# Of the Great

# Rumpus Cat

# The Pekes and the Pollicles
Everyone knows

# Are proud and implacable
Passionate foes

# It is always the same
Wherever one goes

# And the Pugs and the Poms
Are the most people say

# That they do not like fighting
Yet once in a way

# They now and again
Join into the fray, and they

# Bark
# Bark

# Bark
# Bark

# Until you can hear them
All over the park

# Now, on the occasion
Of which I shall speak

# Almost nothing had happened
For nearly a week

# (And that's a long time
For a Pol or a Peke)

# The big Police Dog
Was away from his beat

# I don't know the reason
But most people think

# He slipped into the
Wellington Arms for a drink

# And no one at all
Was about on the street

# When a Peke and a Pollicle
Happened to meet

# They did not advance
Or exactly retreat

# But they glared at each other
And scraped their hind feet

# And started to
# Bark, bark, bark, bark, bark, bark

# Until you could hear them
All over the park

# And they'd
# Bark, bark, bark, bark, bark, bark

# Until you could hear them
All over the park

# Now, the Peke, although people
May say what they please

# Is no British dog
But a heathen Chinese

# And so all the Pekes
When they heard the uproar

# Some came to the window
Some came to the door

# There were surely a dozen
More likely a score

# And together they started
To grumble and wheeze

# In their huffery-snuffery
Heathen Chinese

# But a terrible din
Is what Pollicles like

# For your Pollicle dog
Is a dour Yorkshire tyke

# There are dogs out of every nation
The Irish, the Welsh and the Dane

# The Russian, Dutch and Dalmatian
And even from China and Spain

# From the Poodle, the Pom
The Alsatian

# And the Mastiff
Who walks on a chain

# And to those that are frisky
And frolicle

# That my meaning be perfectly plain

# That my name is Little Tom Pollicle
And you better not do it again

# And his braw Scottish cousins
Are snappers and biters

# And every dog-jack of them
Notable fighters

# And so they stepped out
With their pipers in order

# Playin' When the Blue Bonnets
Come Over the Border

# Then the Pugs and the Poms
Held no longer aloof

# But some from the balcony
Some from the roof

# Joined into the din with a
# Bark, bark, bark, bark, bark, bark

# Until you could hear them
All over the park

# Huffery-snuffery, huffery-snuffery

# Huffery-snuffery, huffery-snuff

# Until you could hear them
All over the park #

(Whining and howling)

Now!

# When these bold heroes
Together assembled

# The traffic all stopped
And the Underground trembled

# And some of the neighbours
Were so much afraid

# That they started to ring up
The fire brigade

# When suddenly up
From a small basement flat

# Why, who should stalk out

# But the Great Rumpus Cat?

# His eyes were like fireballs

# Fearfully blazing

# He gave a great yawn

# And his jaws were amazing

# And when he looked out
Through the bars of the area

# You never saw anything

# Fiercer

# Or hairier

# And what with the glare
Of his eyes and his yawning

# The Pekes and the Pollicles
Quickly took warning

# He looked to the sky
And he gave a great leap

# And they every last one of them
Scattered like sheep

# And when the Police Dog
Returned to his beat

# There wasn't a single one
Left on the street

(# When the Blue Bonnets
Come Over the Border)

# All hail and all bow to

# The Great Rumpus Cat #

# Jellicle Cats and dogs all must

# Pollicle Dogs and cats all must

# Like undertakers, come to dust #

(Thunder rolls)

Macavity!

# Jellicle Cats come out tonight

# Jellicle Cats, come one, come all

# The Jellicle Moon is shining bright

# Jellicles come to the Jellicle Ball

# Jellicle Cats are black and white

# Jellicle Cats are rather small

# Jellicle Cats are merry and bright

# And pleasant to hear
When we caterwaul

# Jellicle Cats have cheerful faces

# Jellicle Cats
Have bright black eyes

# We like to practise
Our airs and graces

# And wait for the Jellicle Moon
to rise

# Jellicle Cats develop slowly

# Jellicle Cats are not too big

# Jellicle Cats are roly-poly

# We know how to dance
A gavotte and a jig

# Until the Jellicle Moon appears

# We make our toilette
And take our repose

# Jellicles wash behind their ears

# Jellicles dry between their toes

# Jellicle Cats are white and black

# Jellicle Cats are of moderate size

# Jellicles jump like a jumping jack

# Jellicle Cats have moonlit eyes

# We're quiet enough
In the morning hours

# We're quiet enough
In the afternoon

# Reserving our terpsichorean powers

# To dance by the light
Of the Jellicle Moon

# Jellicle Cats are black
And white

# Jellicle Cats,
As we said, are small

# If it happens to be a stormy night

# We will practise a caper
Or two in the hall

# If it happens the sun
Is shining bright

# You would say we had
Nothing to do at all

# We are resting and saving
Ourselves to be right

# For the Jellicle Moon
And the Jellicle Ball

# Jellicle Cats come out tonight

# Jellicle Cats, come one, come all

# The Jellicle Moon is shining bright

# Jellicles come to the Jellicle Ball

# Jellicle Cats come out tonight

# Jellicle Cats, come one, come all

# The Jellicle Moon is shining bright

# Jellicles come
To the Jellicle Ball... #

(Music stops abruptly)

# You see the border of her coat

# Is torn and stained with sand

# And you see

# The corner of her eye

# Twist like a crooked pin

# Midnight

# Not a sound from the pavement

# Has the moon lost her memory?

# She is smiling alone

# In the lamplight

# The withered leaves
Collect at my feet

# And the wind

# Begins to moan

# Every street lamp

# Seems to beat

# A fatalistic warning

# Someone mutters

# And the street lamp gutters

# And soon it will be morning

# Memory

# All alone in the moonlight

# I can smile at the old days

# I was beautiful then

# I remember the time I knew

# What happiness was

# Let the memory

# Live again

# The moments of happiness

# We had the experience

# But missed the meaning

# And approach to the meaning

# Restores the experience
In a different form

# Beyond any meaning

# We can assign to happiness

# The past experience

# Revived in the meaning

# Is not the experience

# Of one life only

# But of many generations

# Not forgetting

# Something that is

# Probably quite ineffable

# Moonlight

# Turn your face to the moonlight

# Let your memory lead you

# Open up, enter in

# If you find there

# The meaning of what happiness is

# Then a new life

# Will begin

# Moonlight

# Turn your face to the moonlight

# Let your memory lead you

# Open up, enter in

# If you find there

# The meaning of what happiness is

# Then a new life

# Will begin

# Gus is the cat
At the theatre door

# His name, as I ought to
Have told you before

# Is really Asparagus

# But that's such a fuss to pronounce

# That we usually call him just Gus

# His coat's very shabby
He's thin as a rake

# And he suffers from palsy
That makes his paws shake

# Yet he was in his youth
Quite the smartest of cats

# But no longer a terror
To mice or to rats

# For he isn't the cat
That he was in his prime

# Though his name was quite famous,
He says, in his time

# And whenever he joins
His friends at their club

# Which takes place at the back
Of the neighbouring pub

# He loves to regale them
If someone else pays

# With anecdotes drawn
From his palmiest days

# For he once was a star
Of the highest degree

# He has acted with Irving
He has acted with tree

# And he likes to relate
His success on the halls

# Where the gallery once gave him

# Seven cat calls

# But his grandest creation

# As he loves to tell

# Was Firefrorefiddle

# The Fiend of the Fell

# I have played in my time

# Every possible part

# And I used to know seventy
Speeches by heart

# I'd extemporise backchat

# I knew how to gag

# And I knew how to let the cat
Out of the bag

# I knew how to act
With my back and my tail

# With an hour of rehearsal
I never could fail

# I'd a voice that would soften
The hardest of hearts

# Whether I took the lead
Or in character parts

# I have sat by the bedside
Of poor little Nell

# When the curfew was rung
Then I swung on the bell

# In the pantomime season
I never fell flat

# And I once understudied
Dick Whittington's Cat

# But my grandest creation

# As history will tell

# Was Firefrorefiddle

# The Fiend of the Fell

# Then if someone will give him
A toothful of gin

# He will tell how he once played
A part in East Lynne

# At a Shakespeare performance
He once walked on pat

# When some actor suggested
The need for a cat

# And I say that these kittens
They do not get trained

# As we did in the days
When Victoria reigned

# They never get drilled
In a regular troupe

# And they think they are smart
Just to jump through a hoop

# And he says as he scratches himself
With his claws

# Well, the theatre is certainly
Not what it was

# These modern productions
Are all very well

# But there's nothing to equal
From what I hear tell

# That moment of mystery

# When I made history

# As Firefrorefiddle

# The Fiend of the Fell... #

(Music fades away, ghostly wind)

# These modern productions

# Are all very well

# But there's nothing to equal

# From what I hear tell

# That moment of mystery

# When I made...

# Skimbleshanks
The Railway Cat

# The cat of the railway train

# There's a whisper down the line
At eleven thirty-nine

# When the Night Mail's
Ready to depart

# Saying Skimble, where is Skimble?
Has he gone to hunt the thimble?

# We must find him
Or the train can't start

# All the guards and all the porters
And the stationmaster's daughters

# Would be searching high and low

# Saying, "Skimble, where is Skimble?
For unless he's very nimble

# "Then the Night Mail just can't go"

# At eleven forty-two
With the signal overdue

# And the passengers
All frantic to a man

# That's when I would appear
And I'd saunter to the rear

# I'd been busy in the luggage van

# Then he gave one flash
Of his glass-green eyes

# And the signal went all clear

# They'd be off at last
For the northern part

# Of the northern hemisphere

# Skimbleshanks the Railway Cat

# The cat of the railway train

# You could say that by and large
It was me who was in charge

# Of the Sleeping Car Express

# From the driver and the guards
To the bagmen playing cards

# I'd supervise them all
More or less

# Down the corridor he paces
And examines all the faces

# Of the travellers
In the First and the Third

# He establishes control
By a regular patrol

# And he'd know at once
If anything occurred

# He would watch you without winking
And he saw what you were thinking

# And it's certain
That he didn't approve

# Of hilarity and riot
So that folk were very quiet

# When Skimble was about
And on the move

# You could play no pranks
With Skimbleshanks

# He's a cat that cannot be ignored

# So nothing went wrong
On the Northern Mail

# When Skimbleshanks was aboard

# It was very pleasant
When they found their little den

# With their name
Written up on the door

# And the berth was very neat
With a newly folded sheet

# And not a speck of dust
On the floor

# There was every sort of light
You could make it dark or bright

# And a button you could turn
To make a breeze

# And a funny little basin
You're supposed to wash your face in

# And a crank to shut
The window should you sneeze

# Then the guard looked in politely
And would ask you very brightly

# Do you like your morning tea
# Weak or strong?

# But I was just behind him
And was ready to remind him

# For Skimble won't let
Anything go wrong

# When they crept into
Their cosy berths

# And pulled down the counterpane

# They ought to reflect
It was very nice

# To know that they wouldn't
Be bothered by mice

# They would leave all that
To the Railway Cat

# The cat of the railway train

# Skimbleshanks the Railway Cat

# The cat of the railway train

# Skimbleshanks the Railway Cat

# The cat of the railway train

# In the watches of the night
I was always fresh and bright

# Every now and then
I'd have a cup of tea

# With perhaps a drop of Scotch
When I was keeping on the watch

# Only stopping here and there
To catch a flea

# They were fast asleep at Crewe
And so they never knew

# That I was walking
Up and down the station

# They were sleeping all the while
I was busy at Carlisle

# Where I met the station master
With elation

# They might see me at Dumfries
If I summoned the police

# If there was anything
They ought to know about

# When they got to Gallowgate
There they did not have to wait

# For Skimbleshanks will help them
To get out

# And he

# Gives you a wave
Of his long brown tail

# Which says I'll see you again

# You will meet without fail
On the midnight mail

# The cat of the railway train

# The cat of the railway

# Train #

(Crashing and banging)

(Sinister laughter)

(Crash)

Macavity!

(Laughing)

# Macavity's a mystery cat

# He's called the Hidden Paw

# For he's the master criminal

# Who can defy the law

# He's the bafflement
Of Scotland Yard

# The Flying Squad's despair

# For when they reach
The scene of crime

# Macavity's not there!

# Macavity, Macavity
There's no one like Macavity

# He's broken every human law

# He breaks the law of gravity

# His powers of levitation

# Would make a fakir stare

# And when you reach
the scene of crime

# Macavity's not there

# You may seek him in the basement

# You may look up in the air

# But I tell you once and once again
Macavity's not there!

# Macavity's a ginger cat

# He's very tall and thin

# You would know him if you saw him

# For his eyes are sunken in

# His brow is deeply
Lined with thought

# His head is highly domed

# His coat is dusty from neglect

# His whiskers are uncombed

# He sways his head from side to side

# With movements like a snake

# And when you think he's half asleep

# He's always wide awake

# Macavity, Macavity
There's no one like Macavity

# For he's a fiend in feline shape

# A monster of depravity

# You may meet him in a by-street

# You may see him in the square

# But when a crime's discovered
Then Macavity's not there

# He's outwardly respectable

# I know he cheats at cards

# And his footprints are not found in

# Any files of Scotland Yard's

# And when the larder's looted

# Or the jewel case is rifled

# Or when the milk is missing

# Or another Peke's been stifled

# Or the greenhouse glass is broken

# And the trellis past repair

# There's the wonder of the thing
Macavity's not there!

# Macavity, Macavity
There's no one like Macavity

# There never was a cat

# Of such deceitfulness and suavity

# He always has an alibi

# And one or two to spare

# Whatever time the deed took place
Macavity wasn't there

# And they say that all the cats

# Whose wicked deeds are widely known

# I might mention Mungojerrie

# I might mention Griddlebone

# Are nothing more than agents

# For the cat who all the time

# Just controls the operations

# The Napoleon of Crime!

# Macavity, Macavity
There's no one like Macavity

# He's a fiend in feline shape

# A monster of depravity

# You may meet him in a by-street

# You may see him in the square

# But when a crime's discovered
Then Macavity

# Macavity

# Macavity

# Macavity

# When a crime's discovered
Then Macavity's not there

(Music stops abruptly)

(Sinister laughter)

(Cats) Macavity!

(Cats whisper) Macavity's not there.

# We have to find

# Old Deuteronomy #

You ought to ask
Magical Mr Mistoffelees

The original Conjuring Cat
There can be no doubt about that

Please listen to me
And don't scoff

All his inventions
Are off his own bat

There's no such cat in the metropolis
He holds all the patent monopolies

For performing surprising illusions

And creating eccentric confusions

# The greatest magicians
Have something to learn

# From Mr Mistoffelees'
Conjuring turn

# And we all say

# Oh! Well, I never
Was there ever a cat so clever

# As magical Mr Mistoffelees

# He is quiet, he is small,
He is black

# From his ears
To the tip of his tail

# He can creep
Through the tiniest crack

# He can walk on the narrowest rail

# He can pick any card from the pack

# He's equally cunning with dice

# He's always deceiving you
Into believing

# That he's only hunting for mice

# He can play any trick with a cork

# Or a spoon and a bit of fish paste

# If you look for a knife or a fork

# And you think
That it's merely misplaced

# You have seen it one moment
But then it is gone

# But you find it next week
Laying out on the lawn

# And we all say

# Oh! Well, I never
Was there ever a cat so clever

# As magical Mr Mistoffelees
Presto!

# Oh! Well, I never
Was there ever a cat so clever

# As magical Mr Mistoffelees

# Oh! Well, I never
Was there ever a cat so clever

# As magical Mr Mistoffelees

# His manner is vague and aloof

# And you would think
There was nobody shyer

# But his voice can be
Heard on the roof

# While he was curled up by the fire

# And he's sometimes
Been heard by the fire

# While he was about on the roof

# At least we all heard
That somebody purred

# Which is incontestable proof

# Of his singular magical powers

# And I've known the family to call

# Him in from the garden for hours

# While he was asleep in the hall

# And not long ago
This phenomenal cat

# Produced seven kittens

# Right out of a hat

# And we all say

# Oh! Well, I never
Was there ever a cat so clever

# As magical Mr Mistoffelees... #

(Laughter)

Magical!

# And not long ago,
This phenomenal cat

# Produced seven kittens

# Right out of a hat... #

(Drum roll)

(Drum roll)

(Cats gasp)

# And we all say

# Oh! Well, I never

# Was there ever a cat so clever

# As magical Mr Mistoffelees

# Oh! Well, I never
Was there ever a cat so clever

# As magical Mr Mistoffelees

# Oh! Well, I never
Was there ever a cat so clever

# As magical Mr Mistoffelees...

# Mystical!

# Oh! Well, I never
Was there ever a cat so clever...

# Magical! Mystical!

# Oh! Well, I never
Was there ever a cat so clever

# As magical Mr Mistoffelees #

I give you the magical...

The marvellous... Mr Mistoffelees!

# Daylight

# See the dew on a sunflower

# And a rose that is fading

# #Roses wither away

# Like the sunflower

# I yearn to turn my face to the dawn

# I am waiting

# For the day... #

Now Old Deuteronomy

Just before dawn

Through a silence you feel
You could cut with a knife

Announces the cat
Who can now be reborn

And come back to a different
Jellicle Life

# Memory

# Turn your face to the moonlight

# Let your memory lead you

# Open up, enter in

# If you find there

# The meaning of what happiness is

# Then a new life

# Will begin

# Memory

# All alone in the moonlight

# I can smile at the old days

# I was beautiful then

# I remember

# A time I knew what happiness was

# Let the memory

# Live again

# Burnt out ends of smoky days

# The stale cold smell

# Of morning

# The street lamp dies

# Another night is over

# Another day

# Is dawning

# Daylight

# I must wait for the sunrise

# I must think of the new life

# And I mustn't give in

# When the dawn comes

# Tonight will be a memory, too

# And the new day

# Will begin

# Sunlight through the trees
In summer

# Endless masquerading

# Like a flower
As the dawn is breaking

# The memory

# Is fading

# Touch me

# It's so easy to leave me

# All alone with the memory

# Of my days in the sun

# If you touch me

# You'll understand what happiness is

# Look, a new day

# Has begun #

# Up up up
Past the Russell Hotel

# Up up up up
To the Heaviside Layer

# Up up up
Past the Russell Hotel

# Up up up up
To the Heaviside Layer

# Up up up
Past the Russell Hotel

# Up up up up
To the Heaviside Layer

# Up up up
Past the Russell Hotel

# Up up up up
To the Heaviside Layer

# Up up up
Past the Jellicle Moon

# Up up up up
To the Heaviside Layer

# Up up up
Past the Jellicle Moon

# Up up up up
To the Heaviside Layer

# The mystical divinity

# Of unashamed felinity

# Round the cathedral

# Rang vivat

# Life to

# The everlasting

# Cat

# You've heard of
Several kinds of cat

# And my opinion now is that

# You should need no interpreter

# To understand our character

# You've learned enough
To take the view

# That cats are very much like you

# You've seen us both
At work and games

# And learnt about our proper names

# Our habits and our habitat

# But how would you

# Address a cat?

# So first

# Your memory I'll jog

# And say a cat

# Is not a dog

# So first

# Your memory I'll jog

# And say a cat

# Is not a dog

# With cats

# Some say one rule is true

# Don't speak till you

# Are spoken to

# Myself, I do not hold with that

# I say you should address a cat

# But always keep in mind that he

# Resents familiarity

# You bow

# And taking off your hat

# Address him in

# This form

# "Oh, Cat!"

# Before a cat will condescend

# To treat you as a trusted friend

# Some little token of esteem

# Is needed, like a dish of cream

# And you might now and then supply

# Some caviar or Strassburg Pie

# Some potted grouse or salmon paste

# He's sure to have
His personal taste

# And so in time you reach your aim

# And call him

# By his name

# A cat's entitled to expect

# These evidences of respect

# So this is this

# And that is that

# And there's how you address a cat

# A cat's entitled to expect

# These evidences of respect

# So this is this

# And that is that

# And there's how you address

# A Cat #

English
RicHard jan 27 2009