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1
00:00:07,094 --> 00:00:08,704
[birds chirping]
2
00:00:08,747 --> 00:00:09,748
Hi.
3
00:00:24,154 --> 00:00:26,287
For fuck's sake!
4
00:00:26,417 --> 00:00:28,724
How can we be late again?
5
00:00:28,854 --> 00:00:30,378
It's unbelievable!
6
00:00:30,508 --> 00:00:32,119
We should win
some sort of award.
7
00:00:32,249 --> 00:00:34,077
ALLY: We'd miss the ceremony.
Hey, hurry up.
8
00:00:34,208 --> 00:00:37,254
Luke, telly off.
Come on, coat on.
9
00:00:37,385 --> 00:00:39,126
I don't want to go school.
10
00:00:39,256 --> 00:00:40,910
"To" school.
Yes, you do.
11
00:00:41,041 --> 00:00:42,172
And even if you don't,
tough tits.
12
00:00:42,303 --> 00:00:44,783
Tariq said there's
no Father Christmas.
13
00:00:44,914 --> 00:00:46,220
Shh, Michael's still asleep.
14
00:00:46,350 --> 00:00:47,569
All right, Ally.
15
00:00:47,699 --> 00:00:48,787
He's not a baby.
He can wake up.
16
00:00:48,918 --> 00:00:51,616
Tariq said you two
buy the presents, hide them,
17
00:00:51,747 --> 00:00:54,184
and then put them under
the tree while I'm asleep.
18
00:00:54,315 --> 00:00:56,360
Well, maybe Tariq
knows something--
19
00:00:56,491 --> 00:00:57,405
ALLY: Tariq is a tiny idiot.
20
00:00:57,535 --> 00:00:58,928
Of course there's
a Father Christmas.
21
00:00:59,059 --> 00:01:01,061
Is that true, Daddy?
22
00:01:02,149 --> 00:01:03,063
-Uh...
-ALLY: Hey look, just go and--
23
00:01:03,193 --> 00:01:04,586
go and brush your teeth now,
all of them.
24
00:01:04,716 --> 00:01:06,240
He hasn't brushed--
25
00:01:06,370 --> 00:01:07,589
I've just put his coat on.
Did you not see?
26
00:01:07,719 --> 00:01:08,720
Shh.
27
00:01:08,851 --> 00:01:10,635
Go.
Up, up, up, up, up.
28
00:01:10,766 --> 00:01:12,159
Come on, he's only seven.
29
00:01:12,289 --> 00:01:13,377
Don't shit on his dreams
just yet.
30
00:01:13,508 --> 00:01:14,509
Wait till he's eight.
31
00:01:14,639 --> 00:01:15,945
I'm just not comfortable lying.
32
00:01:16,076 --> 00:01:17,294
-Since when?
-Since forever.
33
00:01:17,425 --> 00:01:18,774
How can you not know that
about me?
34
00:01:18,904 --> 00:01:21,298
What, sorry, are you saying
that you've never lied before?
35
00:01:21,429 --> 00:01:24,432
Not about anything important,
to anyone important.
36
00:01:24,562 --> 00:01:27,435
[both laughing]
37
00:01:27,565 --> 00:01:29,437
ALLY: "Hello, my name is Paul."
38
00:01:29,567 --> 00:01:30,568
Hi, it's Paul.
39
00:01:30,699 --> 00:01:31,961
I'm sorry, I won't be able
to come in today,
40
00:01:32,092 --> 00:01:34,529
I'm afraid, because--
because there's been a--
41
00:01:34,659 --> 00:01:36,531
there's been a death
in the family.
42
00:01:36,661 --> 00:01:38,359
-[mouthing words]
-It's my girlfriend's dad.
43
00:01:38,489 --> 00:01:40,143
-[gasps]
-Called, yeah, Michael.
44
00:01:40,274 --> 00:01:42,189
It is a shock.
We were very close.
45
00:01:42,319 --> 00:01:43,320
I'm so sorry.
46
00:01:43,451 --> 00:01:45,583
-[laughing]
-Hey! Thank you. Bye.
47
00:01:45,714 --> 00:01:46,758
I will fuck you up.
48
00:01:46,889 --> 00:01:47,890
-No, you won't.
-I will.
49
00:01:48,020 --> 00:01:49,283
Please don't.
[laughs]
50
00:01:49,413 --> 00:01:50,110
Open wide.
51
00:01:50,240 --> 00:01:51,459
-[exhales]
-Oh, lovely. Mwah.
52
00:01:51,589 --> 00:01:52,547
Love you, chooch.
Love you, poop.
53
00:01:52,677 --> 00:01:53,591
-LUKE: Bye, Mum.
-Love you, bye.
54
00:01:53,722 --> 00:01:55,158
-Bye, darling.
-Bye.
55
00:01:55,289 --> 00:01:56,768
-Don't slam the...
-[door slams]
56
00:01:56,899 --> 00:01:58,074
MICHAEL: I don't know
why you're all whispering.
57
00:01:58,205 --> 00:02:00,163
I'm not asleep.
58
00:02:00,294 --> 00:02:02,122
Why don't I make us pancakes?
59
00:02:02,252 --> 00:02:03,427
Because I've got a job,
60
00:02:03,558 --> 00:02:05,864
and in this country, we only
have pancakes once a year.
61
00:02:05,995 --> 00:02:07,344
It's something to do
with using up eggs
62
00:02:07,475 --> 00:02:08,432
and the crucifixion.
63
00:02:08,563 --> 00:02:09,868
Bye.
64
00:02:09,999 --> 00:02:11,305
Weird.
65
00:02:11,435 --> 00:02:12,349
[door closes]
66
00:02:12,480 --> 00:02:15,004
[upbeat music]
67
00:02:15,135 --> 00:02:21,924
♪
68
00:02:24,666 --> 00:02:26,363
Off to meet
the Europe money guys.
69
00:02:26,494 --> 00:02:28,060
Tie or no tie?
70
00:02:28,191 --> 00:02:29,584
I mean, does it make me
look a bit jowly,
71
00:02:29,714 --> 00:02:30,628
or does it add a bit
of formal heft?
72
00:02:30,759 --> 00:02:31,934
What?
73
00:02:32,064 --> 00:02:33,109
I wish you'd come
to this meeting, Ally.
74
00:02:33,240 --> 00:02:35,242
These guys love you.
Hmm?
75
00:02:35,372 --> 00:02:37,722
Everyone wants a piece of Ally,me included.
76
00:02:37,853 --> 00:02:39,898
-Your...talents.
-So it's all looking good?
77
00:02:40,029 --> 00:02:41,726
Well, fingers crossed,
those shares of yours
78
00:02:41,857 --> 00:02:43,380
will be worth gazillions soon.
79
00:02:43,511 --> 00:02:45,382
Today Europe,
tomorrow more of Europe,
80
00:02:45,513 --> 00:02:47,732
and who knows about the day
after tomorrow?
81
00:02:47,863 --> 00:02:49,517
Isn't that a film
about the apocalypse?
82
00:02:49,647 --> 00:02:51,910
Right, it is, yeah.
Yeah, bleak.
83
00:02:52,041 --> 00:02:53,260
Oh, God,
imagine that, though,
84
00:02:53,390 --> 00:02:55,044
a studio in Paris or Rome.
85
00:02:55,175 --> 00:02:56,872
More likely to be Berlin,
but yes.
86
00:02:57,002 --> 00:02:59,266
Oh, well, Berlin's exciting.
I'm not sure why.
87
00:02:59,396 --> 00:03:01,616
It's very hip, isn't it,
lots of clubs and stuff.
88
00:03:01,746 --> 00:03:04,314
It's the city of the future,
Blade Runner,Bowie.
89
00:03:04,445 --> 00:03:06,142
I love Bowie.
[chuckles]
90
00:03:06,273 --> 00:03:08,362
♪ Little drummer boy
91
00:03:08,492 --> 00:03:10,277
And the edgier stuff.
92
00:03:11,495 --> 00:03:13,105
I couldn't live out there,
Darren, you know that,
93
00:03:13,236 --> 00:03:14,846
so don't ask.
94
00:03:14,977 --> 00:03:16,413
DARREN:
I'm not going to ask that...
95
00:03:16,544 --> 00:03:18,067
yet.
96
00:03:18,198 --> 00:03:20,939
♪
97
00:03:21,070 --> 00:03:24,073
[indistinct chatter]
98
00:03:26,641 --> 00:03:28,773
-Good day?
-Don't know.
99
00:03:28,904 --> 00:03:31,211
No, it's a tricky question,
that, isn't it?
100
00:03:31,341 --> 00:03:33,430
-Any trouble with Tariq?
-Don't know.
101
00:03:34,605 --> 00:03:36,868
Well, I had a great day.
Thanks for asking.
102
00:03:36,999 --> 00:03:38,218
Saw a dog riding a motorbike.
103
00:03:38,348 --> 00:03:40,089
-Did you?
-No.
104
00:03:40,220 --> 00:03:41,177
Be good if I did, though,
wouldn't it?
105
00:03:41,308 --> 00:03:42,439
It'd make life worth living.
106
00:03:42,570 --> 00:03:45,355
Granddad Michael
saw a dancing bear once.
107
00:03:45,486 --> 00:03:47,009
Of course he did.
108
00:03:47,139 --> 00:03:48,576
Is Granddad Michael
staying forever?
109
00:03:48,706 --> 00:03:50,360
[laughs]
Not a chance.
110
00:03:50,491 --> 00:03:52,144
I like having him
in the house.
111
00:03:52,275 --> 00:03:53,320
Yeah, me too.
112
00:03:53,450 --> 00:03:54,712
Love hearing him
knocking around downstairs
113
00:03:54,843 --> 00:03:56,236
24 hours a day,
114
00:03:56,366 --> 00:03:58,412
playing The Lovin' Spoonful
and clearing his throat.
115
00:03:58,542 --> 00:03:59,456
Hey, there he is.
116
00:03:59,587 --> 00:04:01,371
-Hey, Granddad Michael!
-Hey, buddy.
117
00:04:01,502 --> 00:04:02,546
-Hey.
-Hey.
118
00:04:02,677 --> 00:04:04,113
You moving on?
You found somewhere?
119
00:04:04,244 --> 00:04:05,941
-Well...
-Penthouse or flophouse?
120
00:04:06,071 --> 00:04:07,334
Hang on, this is my stuff.
121
00:04:07,464 --> 00:04:09,292
Yeah, sorry,
this is off to the junkyard.
122
00:04:09,423 --> 00:04:11,599
Ally's on
a decluttering rampage.
123
00:04:12,339 --> 00:04:13,949
But I assure you, Paul,
124
00:04:14,079 --> 00:04:16,343
I am this close
to finding my own place.
125
00:04:17,605 --> 00:04:20,260
You didn't make a gesture
to show how close--
126
00:04:20,390 --> 00:04:22,436
M-Mic--Michael?
127
00:04:23,611 --> 00:04:24,786
Excuse me, Ally?
128
00:04:24,916 --> 00:04:26,701
I bought this for my Auntie Jan
129
00:04:26,831 --> 00:04:28,355
on our first foreign holiday.
130
00:04:28,485 --> 00:04:29,921
She died before I could even
give it to her.
131
00:04:30,052 --> 00:04:31,488
Well, she probably
won't miss it, then.
132
00:04:31,619 --> 00:04:33,447
Do I get to decide
what I can keep?
133
00:04:33,577 --> 00:04:35,405
Yeah, if you apply
my simple criteria.
134
00:04:35,536 --> 00:04:36,276
Which are?
135
00:04:36,406 --> 00:04:38,147
If you don't like it
or use it, then bin it.
136
00:04:38,278 --> 00:04:40,454
That is most of the stuff
I own.
137
00:04:40,584 --> 00:04:41,716
Luke's babygrow.
138
00:04:41,846 --> 00:04:43,805
This is the first thing
that touched his newborn skin.
139
00:04:43,935 --> 00:04:45,067
It was one
of the first things.
140
00:04:45,197 --> 00:04:47,156
It was from a 12-pack
from Mothercare.
141
00:04:47,287 --> 00:04:48,549
Just let it go.
It's just stuff.
142
00:04:48,679 --> 00:04:50,290
I can't bear stuff.
143
00:04:50,420 --> 00:04:53,597
Ideally I'd only havewhat fitted in a small suitcase.
144
00:04:53,728 --> 00:04:55,425
Why?
Where are you going?
145
00:04:55,556 --> 00:04:57,514
Stuff's nice.
It's memories and context.
146
00:04:57,645 --> 00:04:58,559
We've got no room.
147
00:04:58,689 --> 00:05:00,169
We're surrounded by crap,
148
00:05:00,300 --> 00:05:02,084
like we're on a documentary
about hoarders
149
00:05:02,214 --> 00:05:03,825
who keep their turds
in Tupperware.
150
00:05:03,955 --> 00:05:05,305
You're not getting rid
of Dr. Flump?
151
00:05:05,435 --> 00:05:06,567
No.
152
00:05:06,697 --> 00:05:08,438
I'm getting buried
with Dr. Flump...
153
00:05:08,569 --> 00:05:10,048
and a phone, just in case.
154
00:05:10,179 --> 00:05:17,012
♪
155
00:05:21,103 --> 00:05:23,888
Oh, why are you wearing
my pajamas?
156
00:05:24,019 --> 00:05:26,369
The same reason I run the taps
every time I do a shit now,
157
00:05:26,500 --> 00:05:28,110
'cause there's a man
I don't know that well
158
00:05:28,240 --> 00:05:29,851
living in my house.
159
00:05:29,981 --> 00:05:31,809
-Ooh, I like it.
-[giggles]
160
00:05:31,940 --> 00:05:34,986
Mm, no, sorry.
I can't. I can't.
161
00:05:35,117 --> 00:05:36,988
Not when Michael's downstairs.
162
00:05:37,119 --> 00:05:39,774
What, not even in the bathroom
with the taps on?
163
00:05:39,904 --> 00:05:41,036
Mm-mm.
164
00:05:42,646 --> 00:05:44,344
-Are we okay?
-Yeah.
165
00:05:44,474 --> 00:05:46,215
-Aren't we?
-Yeah, I think so.
166
00:05:46,346 --> 00:05:48,217
Yeah. It's only
'cause Michael's here.
167
00:05:48,348 --> 00:05:50,262
He's out on Saturday night
if you want to pencil one in.
168
00:05:50,393 --> 00:05:51,699
Great.
169
00:05:53,527 --> 00:05:54,354
Is he actually looking
for a place?
170
00:05:54,484 --> 00:05:56,094
Mm-hmm.
171
00:05:57,226 --> 00:05:58,445
Ooh.
172
00:05:58,575 --> 00:06:01,361
"Three young professional girlslooking for a housemate."
173
00:06:01,491 --> 00:06:03,798
I'm not thinking of it
at all sexually.
174
00:06:03,928 --> 00:06:07,454
It would just be fun.
Nights in drinking Prosecco.
175
00:06:07,584 --> 00:06:10,413
I think that one is more you.
176
00:06:10,544 --> 00:06:14,286
"Live-in carer
for housebound widower."
177
00:06:14,417 --> 00:06:16,637
You know, I'd probably
still drink Prosecco.
178
00:06:16,767 --> 00:06:19,466
[laughs] More for me ifthe guy's on medication, right?
179
00:06:19,596 --> 00:06:20,815
Look, I don't want
to put a downer
180
00:06:20,945 --> 00:06:22,425
on your Prosecco lifestyle,
181
00:06:22,556 --> 00:06:24,558
but how the fuck are you
gonna pay the rent?
182
00:06:24,688 --> 00:06:27,343
I'm doing some Reiki massage
at the health center.
183
00:06:27,474 --> 00:06:28,388
Right.
Are you qualified?
184
00:06:28,518 --> 00:06:31,608
-I have a certificate.
-From where?
185
00:06:31,739 --> 00:06:35,525
The Reiki Institute.
186
00:06:35,656 --> 00:06:38,049
Or ReikiMe.com.
One of those.
187
00:06:38,180 --> 00:06:39,616
Reiki Barn.
188
00:06:39,747 --> 00:06:41,836
Yeah, whatever.
It's--it's trimmed in gold.
189
00:06:41,966 --> 00:06:43,664
It's got a little wax seal.
[pops lips]
190
00:06:43,794 --> 00:06:46,406
Wow, well, then you're--
you're clearly a doctor.
191
00:06:46,536 --> 00:06:47,972
Yeah, more or less.
192
00:06:48,103 --> 00:06:50,410
Ooh, "Houseboat to share.
193
00:06:50,540 --> 00:06:52,499
No questions asked."
194
00:06:53,848 --> 00:06:55,502
Kind of vague, isn't it?
195
00:06:55,632 --> 00:06:57,460
♪
196
00:07:01,072 --> 00:07:02,944
-Hey...
-Hmm?
197
00:07:04,206 --> 00:07:06,469
You know how you like
to throw everything
198
00:07:06,600 --> 00:07:09,559
up in the air
and sort of fuck it off?
199
00:07:09,690 --> 00:07:11,474
-Since when?
-Always.
200
00:07:11,605 --> 00:07:14,346
Your music training,
your last relationship.
201
00:07:14,477 --> 00:07:16,087
If things aren't right,
I move on.
202
00:07:16,218 --> 00:07:17,393
Are you saying
things aren't right
203
00:07:17,524 --> 00:07:18,481
and you want to move on?
204
00:07:18,612 --> 00:07:20,091
Oh, my God.
205
00:07:20,222 --> 00:07:22,659
I want to move on with you
and the kids, you idiot,
206
00:07:22,790 --> 00:07:24,879
to a bigger house.
207
00:07:25,009 --> 00:07:26,533
-Bigger? Really?
-Mm-hmm.
208
00:07:26,663 --> 00:07:28,578
We need separate rooms
for Luke and Ava,
209
00:07:28,709 --> 00:07:30,450
less lethal stairs
so the Social Services
210
00:07:30,580 --> 00:07:31,886
don't come to knacker us again,
211
00:07:32,016 --> 00:07:34,192
a garden with a shed
at the bottom of it
212
00:07:34,323 --> 00:07:36,412
to put Michael in
so I can shit in peace.
213
00:07:36,543 --> 00:07:38,240
Well, he's not gonna
be here forever, is he?
214
00:07:38,370 --> 00:07:40,329
I think we should downsize,
if anything.
215
00:07:40,460 --> 00:07:42,374
Really?
What, no.
216
00:07:42,505 --> 00:07:43,680
I'm gonna go through
the mortgage stuff tomorrow
217
00:07:43,811 --> 00:07:44,464
and do some sums.
218
00:07:44,594 --> 00:07:46,030
Do you know where it is?
219
00:07:47,554 --> 00:07:50,687
No.
On a pile somewhere.
220
00:07:52,776 --> 00:07:55,213
I don't want to move.
221
00:07:55,344 --> 00:07:57,912
Great. Well, that's that, then.
222
00:07:58,042 --> 00:08:04,832
♪
223
00:08:07,487 --> 00:08:09,010
Okay, so what
are we looking for?
224
00:08:09,140 --> 00:08:10,228
Christmas presents.
225
00:08:10,359 --> 00:08:12,230
You do realize
it isn't Christmas?
226
00:08:12,361 --> 00:08:14,581
Tariq says sometimes
you can still find them.
227
00:08:14,711 --> 00:08:15,973
I don't want to.
228
00:08:16,104 --> 00:08:18,628
[sighs] It's best just to go
with the flow, Ava.
229
00:08:18,759 --> 00:08:19,629
What's the flow?
230
00:08:19,760 --> 00:08:21,544
It's what everybody else
wants to do.
231
00:08:21,675 --> 00:08:22,632
Yes.
232
00:08:22,763 --> 00:08:23,720
And then
when they're not looking,
233
00:08:23,851 --> 00:08:24,939
you just do your own thing.
234
00:08:25,069 --> 00:08:26,506
[laughs]
235
00:08:26,636 --> 00:08:33,469
♪
236
00:08:40,868 --> 00:08:42,870
Grandpa Michael,
I found a present!
237
00:08:43,000 --> 00:08:44,741
Okay.
238
00:08:47,875 --> 00:08:49,703
What is it?
239
00:08:49,833 --> 00:08:53,663
Oh, that's--that's
your mom's wedding album.
240
00:08:54,664 --> 00:08:56,231
♪
241
00:08:59,669 --> 00:09:01,584
Oh-ho,
look how gorgeous I am.
242
00:09:01,715 --> 00:09:03,543
That was a great suit.
243
00:09:03,673 --> 00:09:06,546
Ozwald Boateng,
I loved that suit.
244
00:09:06,676 --> 00:09:09,200
And there's younger,
sexier Grandma
245
00:09:09,331 --> 00:09:10,637
and your mom and Liam.
246
00:09:10,767 --> 00:09:11,681
LUKE: Where's Daddy?
247
00:09:11,812 --> 00:09:14,336
Oh, this was a billion years
before Paul.
248
00:09:14,466 --> 00:09:15,772
This was the Liam epoch.
249
00:09:15,903 --> 00:09:17,600
He was a huge dumbass.
250
00:09:17,731 --> 00:09:19,689
But he meant well,
251
00:09:19,820 --> 00:09:21,299
and he had a lot
of idiot energy.
252
00:09:21,430 --> 00:09:25,347
He smashed four 8K peaks
before his 25th birthday.
253
00:09:25,477 --> 00:09:28,350
[upbeat music]
254
00:09:28,480 --> 00:09:32,136
♪
255
00:09:32,267 --> 00:09:33,224
[door thuds]
256
00:09:33,355 --> 00:09:36,619
What? Ah!
Bloody hell, Ava!
257
00:09:36,750 --> 00:09:39,274
All my baby toys
have come back.
258
00:09:39,404 --> 00:09:40,928
You need to clear up,
or the messy police
259
00:09:41,058 --> 00:09:42,538
will come and put you
in messy prison.
260
00:09:42,669 --> 00:09:44,453
I want to go to messy prison.
261
00:09:44,584 --> 00:09:46,237
No, messy prison
is disgusting.
262
00:09:46,368 --> 00:09:47,282
The pillows
are made of plug hair
263
00:09:47,412 --> 00:09:49,458
and breakfast
is earwax on toast.
264
00:09:49,589 --> 00:09:51,765
Oh!
You clever little girl.
265
00:09:51,895 --> 00:09:52,592
I was looking for those.
266
00:09:52,722 --> 00:09:54,115
LUKE: Why is his hair wet?
267
00:09:54,245 --> 00:09:55,725
Was it raining?
268
00:09:55,856 --> 00:09:58,249
No, that's self-inflicted.
He was addicted to hair gel.
269
00:09:58,380 --> 00:09:59,686
ALLY: Hi, I'm not staying.
270
00:09:59,816 --> 00:10:02,776
Hang on, why is that out?
271
00:10:02,906 --> 00:10:04,038
That should be
in the cupboard.
272
00:10:04,168 --> 00:10:05,343
Mum!
273
00:10:05,474 --> 00:10:07,824
Oh, I see your wedding album
escaped the big cull.
274
00:10:07,955 --> 00:10:09,478
ALLY: Yeah, well, they're
the only photos of you and Mum
275
00:10:09,609 --> 00:10:10,827
not scowling like chimps.
276
00:10:10,958 --> 00:10:12,829
Why are you married
to that man?
277
00:10:13,830 --> 00:10:16,093
He was just practice
for the real thing,
278
00:10:16,224 --> 00:10:17,704
which is Daddy.
279
00:10:17,834 --> 00:10:20,141
Do you love that man or Daddy?
280
00:10:20,271 --> 00:10:21,490
Daddy, of course.
281
00:10:21,621 --> 00:10:22,752
People fall out of love
with other people,
282
00:10:22,883 --> 00:10:24,058
just happens.
283
00:10:24,188 --> 00:10:26,843
Will you fall out of love
with me?
284
00:10:26,974 --> 00:10:28,671
Oh, no, no, no, it's not
the same with children.
285
00:10:28,802 --> 00:10:30,586
Will you fall out of love
with Daddy?
286
00:10:30,717 --> 00:10:32,762
-No.
-You never will? Promise?
287
00:10:32,893 --> 00:10:34,503
I promise I will never ever,
288
00:10:34,634 --> 00:10:35,896
ever fall out of love
with Daddy, okay?
289
00:10:36,026 --> 00:10:38,986
Though, of course,
as greasy Liam can attest,
290
00:10:39,116 --> 00:10:41,510
there are no absolutes
when it comes to love.
291
00:10:41,641 --> 00:10:43,338
LEAH: Thank you for dinner.
Lovely.
292
00:10:43,468 --> 00:10:44,644
You barely ate anything.
293
00:10:44,774 --> 00:10:46,167
I had the soup.
294
00:10:46,297 --> 00:10:47,864
How do you think
I stay so trim?
295
00:10:47,995 --> 00:10:50,824
No solid food
after 6:00 p.m.
296
00:10:50,954 --> 00:10:53,130
It's very hard to keep
the weight off after babies.
297
00:10:53,261 --> 00:10:54,654
I ballooned with you,
298
00:10:54,784 --> 00:10:56,656
almost burst me in two,
coming out.
299
00:10:56,786 --> 00:10:59,006
I'm so sorry.
It wasn't deliberate.
300
00:10:59,136 --> 00:11:01,530
Any baby plans,
you and lovely Liam?
301
00:11:01,661 --> 00:11:02,923
No. No, I mean,
he means well,
302
00:11:03,053 --> 00:11:04,664
but I just don't love him.
303
00:11:04,794 --> 00:11:06,404
Right.
304
00:11:06,535 --> 00:11:09,886
Can it be papered over with sex,or is it divorce time?
305
00:11:10,017 --> 00:11:12,541
No, we've tried fixing it,but it just keeps breaking down,
306
00:11:12,672 --> 00:11:15,675
so I think we need
to send this one to landfill.
307
00:11:15,805 --> 00:11:17,807
[phone chimes]
308
00:11:17,938 --> 00:11:21,202
Ooh, excuse me.
I need to go look at a place.
309
00:11:21,332 --> 00:11:24,553
Uh, to live in,
not just a random place.
310
00:11:24,684 --> 00:11:26,555
But I've got to work.I thought you were babysitting.
311
00:11:26,686 --> 00:11:28,905
Oh, I thought that was just
a soft pencil.
312
00:11:29,036 --> 00:11:30,341
Did we firm the pencil?
313
00:11:30,472 --> 00:11:32,169
Yes, we did, during
the conversation that went,
314
00:11:32,300 --> 00:11:34,911
"If you let me stay, I will
babysit whenever you want."
315
00:11:35,042 --> 00:11:36,608
Yeah, okay, okay,
I can cancel.
316
00:11:37,566 --> 00:11:39,481
No, just go.
You need a place.
317
00:11:39,611 --> 00:11:41,048
I'll ask Jim and Jackie.
318
00:11:41,178 --> 00:11:43,050
Yeah, you can always
count on those guys.
319
00:11:43,180 --> 00:11:44,181
Yes, you can.
320
00:11:44,312 --> 00:11:45,705
Bye, Grandpa Michael.
321
00:11:45,835 --> 00:11:46,793
MICHAEL: Bye, Luke.
322
00:11:46,923 --> 00:11:48,272
[sighs]
323
00:11:48,403 --> 00:11:51,928
♪
324
00:11:52,059 --> 00:11:53,190
[buzzer rings]
325
00:11:53,321 --> 00:11:56,803
♪
326
00:11:59,240 --> 00:12:00,981
Thanks for coming, wingman.
327
00:12:01,111 --> 00:12:02,678
[chuckles]
328
00:12:02,809 --> 00:12:04,898
Never really understood
what "wingman" meant.
329
00:12:05,028 --> 00:12:07,465
Is it a prison thing?
I don't know.
330
00:12:09,032 --> 00:12:10,599
Has Ally mentioned
anything to you
331
00:12:10,730 --> 00:12:12,601
about selling up,
you know, moving, mortgages?
332
00:12:12,732 --> 00:12:16,039
She doesn't really come to me
for life advice.
333
00:12:16,170 --> 00:12:18,041
Life is not my strongest suit.
334
00:12:18,172 --> 00:12:19,608
[door opens]
335
00:12:19,739 --> 00:12:21,741
-Mark?
-Michael.
336
00:12:21,871 --> 00:12:24,178
Okay, well, I've got Mark
written down here.
337
00:12:24,308 --> 00:12:25,832
Uh, are you Mark?
338
00:12:25,962 --> 00:12:27,790
No, I'm Paul,
and he's Michael.
339
00:12:29,270 --> 00:12:30,750
Well, I've got Mark
written down.
340
00:12:31,533 --> 00:12:32,795
[stammers]
341
00:12:33,840 --> 00:12:35,667
Do you know what?
Let's go in anyway.
342
00:12:35,798 --> 00:12:36,712
Jesus.
343
00:12:39,454 --> 00:12:42,326
[door creaks]
344
00:12:42,457 --> 00:12:44,198
[muffled music thumping]
345
00:12:44,328 --> 00:12:46,287
[light switch clicking]
346
00:12:46,417 --> 00:12:48,768
MICHAEL: This is good.
Not--not too showy.
347
00:12:48,898 --> 00:12:49,856
-[dog barking]
-[indistinct yelling]
348
00:12:49,986 --> 00:12:51,074
Is this a halfway house?
349
00:12:51,205 --> 00:12:52,989
It can be anything
you want, Mark.
350
00:12:53,120 --> 00:12:55,862
Sort of a blank slate.
351
00:12:57,080 --> 00:13:00,475
So this is £150 a week,
plus bills.
352
00:13:03,086 --> 00:13:04,914
Uh, is there any room
to maneuver?
353
00:13:05,045 --> 00:13:07,874
Um, you could shove that bed
an inch to the wall.
354
00:13:08,004 --> 00:13:10,877
-That might work.
-No, I mean on the money.
355
00:13:11,007 --> 00:13:13,096
My budget is, like, £100.
356
00:13:13,227 --> 00:13:14,837
[laughs]
357
00:13:14,968 --> 00:13:19,233
Yeah, that's--that's
a bit unlikely within the M25.
358
00:13:19,363 --> 00:13:21,148
Look, maybe we could do a deal.
359
00:13:21,278 --> 00:13:23,280
I could talk to the landlords.
360
00:13:23,411 --> 00:13:25,500
£125 maybe?
361
00:13:25,630 --> 00:13:26,893
Do you like the place?
362
00:13:27,023 --> 00:13:28,459
I love it.
363
00:13:30,461 --> 00:13:32,681
[buzzer rings]
364
00:13:32,812 --> 00:13:34,248
Okay, Nana and Granddad
are here.
365
00:13:34,378 --> 00:13:36,859
If Nana and Granddad
are Daddy's mum and dad,
366
00:13:36,990 --> 00:13:38,905
who are Liam's
mum and dad?
367
00:13:39,035 --> 00:13:39,819
Do you know what?
368
00:13:39,949 --> 00:13:41,908
It's best just not to mention
Liam anymore.
369
00:13:42,038 --> 00:13:43,692
-I have to tell a lie?
-ALLY: No, just don't say it.
370
00:13:43,823 --> 00:13:45,825
-LUKE: What if they ask me?-They won't, though, will they?
371
00:13:45,955 --> 00:13:47,827
"Oh, hello, Luke, was your mummymarried to someone else?"
372
00:13:47,957 --> 00:13:48,915
Then I say "no"?
373
00:13:49,045 --> 00:13:50,481
No, no, I'm saying
they won't mention it.
374
00:13:50,612 --> 00:13:51,700
It won't come up.
375
00:13:51,831 --> 00:13:52,744
Cooee!
376
00:13:52,875 --> 00:13:54,268
Oh.
377
00:13:54,398 --> 00:13:55,965
Coming, sorry.
378
00:13:57,227 --> 00:13:59,012
Hi. Thanks so muchfor helping out last-minute.
379
00:13:59,142 --> 00:13:59,969
JIM: That's what we do.
380
00:14:00,100 --> 00:14:02,145
We're the fourth
emergency service.
381
00:14:02,276 --> 00:14:04,017
Police, fire, ambulance,
382
00:14:04,147 --> 00:14:04,844
Jim and Jackie.
383
00:14:04,974 --> 00:14:06,280
What about the coastguard?
384
00:14:06,410 --> 00:14:08,369
Fuck the coastguard.
Show-offs!
385
00:14:08,499 --> 00:14:09,631
-You go, love.
-Thanks. Bye.
386
00:14:09,761 --> 00:14:11,546
-JACKIE: We'll see you later.
-JIM: Bye.
387
00:14:11,676 --> 00:14:12,982
LUKE: Hi, Nana and Granddad.
388
00:14:13,113 --> 00:14:14,592
I've got a thing I can't say.
389
00:14:14,723 --> 00:14:17,073
Ooh, what is it?
Is it a swear word?
390
00:14:17,204 --> 00:14:18,858
-Is it "tits"?
-Jim!
391
00:14:18,988 --> 00:14:20,511
Not "fanny," is it?
392
00:14:20,642 --> 00:14:22,774
'Cause that used to be
a woman's name.
393
00:14:22,905 --> 00:14:24,994
Mummy's married
to another man.
394
00:14:25,125 --> 00:14:30,304
♪
395
00:14:30,434 --> 00:14:33,394
[children laughing]
396
00:14:37,006 --> 00:14:39,182
Who's that?
What you got?
397
00:14:39,313 --> 00:14:40,967
What have you got?
398
00:14:41,097 --> 00:14:43,012
Daddy, I had two ice creams!
399
00:14:43,143 --> 00:14:45,232
Two ice creams?
What a lucky girl.
400
00:14:45,362 --> 00:14:47,016
She wanted two.
401
00:14:47,147 --> 00:14:48,844
Oh, well, you never got me
two ice creams.
402
00:14:48,975 --> 00:14:51,455
No, well, you were horrible.
Ava's lovely.
403
00:14:51,586 --> 00:14:53,066
-Oh!
-JACKIE: I'm joking.
404
00:14:53,196 --> 00:14:54,894
You didn't like ice cream.
405
00:14:55,024 --> 00:14:56,678
-It gave you headaches.
-Not true.
406
00:14:56,808 --> 00:14:58,985
Ava, I'll give you 50p
407
00:14:59,115 --> 00:15:01,030
if you can count all the ants
by that tree.
408
00:15:01,161 --> 00:15:03,903
Oh, do it, do it.
Get that 50p.
409
00:15:04,555 --> 00:15:06,035
-Sit down.
-[Paul sighs]
410
00:15:06,166 --> 00:15:08,211
Your father's got something
to tell you.
411
00:15:08,342 --> 00:15:11,084
What? Jesus.
Which one of you?
412
00:15:11,214 --> 00:15:13,956
It's not cancer.
It's Ally.
413
00:15:14,087 --> 00:15:15,697
There's something
you should know.
414
00:15:15,827 --> 00:15:16,916
What?
415
00:15:17,046 --> 00:15:19,353
Were you aware
of this other guy?
416
00:15:19,483 --> 00:15:20,658
No, what other guy?
417
00:15:20,789 --> 00:15:22,965
He looks like
a polished bollock.
418
00:15:23,096 --> 00:15:26,142
Luke found
the wedding album.
419
00:15:26,273 --> 00:15:27,491
Liam.
420
00:15:27,622 --> 00:15:29,015
Him?
I don't care about that.
421
00:15:29,145 --> 00:15:30,146
-JACKIE: Really?
-No.
422
00:15:30,277 --> 00:15:31,931
Is that why Ally
won't marry you?
423
00:15:32,061 --> 00:15:33,367
Because of this "Liam"?
424
00:15:33,497 --> 00:15:35,108
Ally won't not marry me.
425
00:15:35,238 --> 00:15:36,848
But she married this "Liam."
426
00:15:36,979 --> 00:15:38,415
Stop saying his name
in inverted commas.
427
00:15:38,546 --> 00:15:40,591
A white wedding in a church,
428
00:15:40,722 --> 00:15:42,028
flower girls and pageboys.
429
00:15:42,158 --> 00:15:43,290
I'm not--I'm not bothered
about marriage, Mum.
430
00:15:43,420 --> 00:15:45,466
JIM: You proposed once,
though, didn't you?
431
00:15:45,596 --> 00:15:47,903
Said to me, "This is the woman
I'm gonna marry."
432
00:15:48,034 --> 00:15:49,470
JACKIE: And maybe
she's still married.
433
00:15:49,600 --> 00:15:51,602
That's why she can't marry you.
434
00:15:51,733 --> 00:15:52,995
No, we don't want
to get married, okay?
435
00:15:53,126 --> 00:15:54,736
It's just a piece of paper.
436
00:15:54,866 --> 00:15:56,520
Now, Ally and Liam
had the paper,
437
00:15:56,651 --> 00:15:58,087
but me and Ally
have the kids.
438
00:15:58,218 --> 00:16:00,872
And kids beat paper
in "Kids, Paper, Scissors."
439
00:16:01,917 --> 00:16:05,529
Although scissors beat kids
if they run with them.
440
00:16:05,660 --> 00:16:07,531
You know
it's not a real game?
441
00:16:09,185 --> 00:16:10,926
♪
442
00:16:13,755 --> 00:16:15,061
-[door opens]-PAUL: Right, go on in, you two.
443
00:16:15,191 --> 00:16:16,888
If you're in the bath
in two minutes,
444
00:16:17,019 --> 00:16:18,673
you can watch funny dogs
on YouTube.
445
00:16:18,803 --> 00:16:20,196
-BOTH: Yay!
-Yay!
446
00:16:20,327 --> 00:16:22,198
Ooh, got a drop
of that wine going?
447
00:16:22,329 --> 00:16:23,417
AVA: Wait for me, wait for me!
448
00:16:23,547 --> 00:16:24,896
When were you planning
on telling me
449
00:16:25,027 --> 00:16:27,290
that you fucking re-mortgaged
the fucking house?
450
00:16:32,426 --> 00:16:34,080
-Right...
-Right.
451
00:16:34,210 --> 00:16:38,127
I did release some equity
on the property.
452
00:16:38,258 --> 00:16:39,259
You went behind my back.
453
00:16:39,389 --> 00:16:41,000
"I never lie, how do you not
know that about me?"
454
00:16:41,130 --> 00:16:42,436
You're a fucking liar!
455
00:16:42,566 --> 00:16:43,915
I didn't want to bother you.
You'd just had Ava.
456
00:16:44,046 --> 00:16:45,047
You had a lot on your plate.
457
00:16:46,527 --> 00:16:47,876
You're allergic to admin.
458
00:16:48,007 --> 00:16:49,269
Bullshit!
What is this really about?
459
00:16:49,399 --> 00:16:51,010
Are you fucking
gaslighting me?
460
00:16:51,140 --> 00:16:52,489
I nev--look,
461
00:16:52,620 --> 00:16:54,535
I didn't say anythingbecause you never said anything,
462
00:16:54,665 --> 00:16:59,192
but when Ava was tiny...
463
00:16:59,322 --> 00:17:00,323
you weren't coping very well.
464
00:17:00,454 --> 00:17:01,455
You'd just gone freelance,
465
00:17:01,585 --> 00:17:03,457
so we didn't have
any maternity cover.
466
00:17:03,587 --> 00:17:05,546
I wanted to hire
a maternity nurse, right,
467
00:17:05,676 --> 00:17:07,983
but she cost a bomb,
so I took some time off.
468
00:17:08,114 --> 00:17:09,419
What the fuck
are you trying to say?
469
00:17:09,767 --> 00:17:11,378
That we needed the money becauseyou had postnatal depression.
470
00:17:12,770 --> 00:17:13,989
How fuck--
471
00:17:14,120 --> 00:17:15,208
Fuck you!
472
00:17:15,338 --> 00:17:16,992
I did not have
postnatal depression.
473
00:17:17,123 --> 00:17:20,213
Name one thing, one thingthat would make you think that.
474
00:17:20,343 --> 00:17:22,606
-[baby crying]
-Shh, shh, shh.
475
00:17:22,737 --> 00:17:24,695
[crying continues]
476
00:17:26,175 --> 00:17:28,395
-PAUL: Hey. Ally?
-No, I'm done.
477
00:17:28,525 --> 00:17:30,397
-Ally, no--
-Let me go. Let me go!
478
00:17:30,527 --> 00:17:33,530
[baby crying]
479
00:17:34,705 --> 00:17:37,230
Is Ava from Ava Gardner?
480
00:17:37,360 --> 00:17:40,276
Was it Ava Braun
or Eva Braun?
481
00:17:40,407 --> 00:17:43,366
[baby crying]
482
00:17:43,497 --> 00:17:44,411
[crying echoes]
483
00:17:44,541 --> 00:17:46,935
See, you can't!
How dare you?
484
00:17:48,545 --> 00:17:51,635
Fuck you.
Seriously, fuck you!
485
00:17:51,766 --> 00:17:53,724
[door opens, slams]
486
00:17:53,855 --> 00:17:56,553
Okay. It feels weird
that I heard all that.
487
00:17:56,684 --> 00:17:59,730
Do you want any pancakes?
488
00:17:59,861 --> 00:18:02,864
♪
489
00:18:02,994 --> 00:18:04,518
Ow! Fuck's sake!
490
00:18:06,215 --> 00:18:09,305
So...who's your new man?
491
00:18:09,436 --> 00:18:11,394
How do you know
if I've got a new man or not?
492
00:18:11,525 --> 00:18:12,743
Because you have a glow,
493
00:18:12,874 --> 00:18:14,310
almost invisible
but there.
494
00:18:14,441 --> 00:18:16,530
-[chuckles]
-Who is he?
495
00:18:16,660 --> 00:18:18,097
Just a guy. Paul.
496
00:18:18,227 --> 00:18:19,620
He's a really,
really good guy.
497
00:18:19,750 --> 00:18:21,752
He's not flash or cool,
but...
498
00:18:21,883 --> 00:18:24,320
he's honest, solid, reliable.
499
00:18:25,756 --> 00:18:28,063
We're very different,
you and I.
500
00:18:30,544 --> 00:18:32,067
I've fucked things,
haven't I?
501
00:18:33,112 --> 00:18:35,592
Things have beenthoroughly fucked, by you, yes.
502
00:18:35,723 --> 00:18:36,854
[laughs]
503
00:18:38,073 --> 00:18:39,074
Should I talk to Ally?
504
00:18:39,205 --> 00:18:41,250
[laughs]
About what?
505
00:18:41,381 --> 00:18:43,470
Her favorite Bond?
Her hobbies?
506
00:18:43,600 --> 00:18:45,167
You should probably
cover some of the basics
507
00:18:45,298 --> 00:18:48,214
before you move on to the chat
about postnatal depression.
508
00:18:48,344 --> 00:18:50,129
[groans]
I accept that.
509
00:18:50,259 --> 00:18:52,870
I've missed a lot
of Ally's life.
510
00:18:53,001 --> 00:18:55,221
She calls me Michael, not Dad.
511
00:18:56,787 --> 00:19:00,182
Like I'm just some guy,
some generalized Michael.
512
00:19:03,098 --> 00:19:05,144
Yeah. I know that's tough.
513
00:19:05,274 --> 00:19:08,364
So this has been a golden time,being here with you guys,
514
00:19:08,495 --> 00:19:12,412
playing dad and grandpa
and skulking around the den,
515
00:19:12,542 --> 00:19:14,936
making use
of your excellent facilities.
516
00:19:16,372 --> 00:19:18,896
Well, then you should
probably stay,
517
00:19:19,027 --> 00:19:20,594
for a bit.
518
00:19:20,724 --> 00:19:23,292
Get a job so you can find
a decent place to live.
519
00:19:23,423 --> 00:19:24,815
I would love that.
520
00:19:24,946 --> 00:19:26,469
Don't take the piss, though,
Michael.
521
00:19:26,600 --> 00:19:28,428
Let's say three weeks tops.
522
00:19:34,260 --> 00:19:35,217
I'm gonna call Ally.
523
00:19:35,348 --> 00:19:37,088
Good luck.
524
00:19:37,219 --> 00:19:39,874
Be firm
but utterly abject.
525
00:19:41,267 --> 00:19:44,139
[dance music playing
over speakers]
526
00:19:44,270 --> 00:19:47,055
♪
527
00:19:47,186 --> 00:19:48,535
-Hi. Thanks for meeting me.
-[phone chimes]
528
00:19:48,665 --> 00:19:49,927
I need to get pissed, but I
don't want to sit on my own
529
00:19:50,058 --> 00:19:51,364
like an alkie.
530
00:19:51,494 --> 00:19:53,104
DARREN: Happy to be a plus one.
531
00:19:53,235 --> 00:19:54,889
Oh, fuck's sake.
532
00:19:55,977 --> 00:19:57,413
Everything all right?
533
00:19:57,544 --> 00:20:00,111
I've been thinking about--
about what you said about us.
534
00:20:00,242 --> 00:20:04,681
Really? Oh, okay, well, wow.
Really?
535
00:20:04,812 --> 00:20:06,770
No, no, I mean me being
a shareholder
536
00:20:06,901 --> 00:20:08,119
in the business, Berlin,
all that.
537
00:20:08,250 --> 00:20:09,730
You wouldn't want me
if I was some sort of
538
00:20:09,860 --> 00:20:11,253
mental liability,
would you?
539
00:20:11,384 --> 00:20:13,124
-No.
-No, like, for instance,
540
00:20:13,255 --> 00:20:14,909
-after I had Ava.
-Right.
541
00:20:15,039 --> 00:20:16,215
Yeah, because
I came back to work
542
00:20:16,345 --> 00:20:18,260
when Ava was eight weeks old,
and I couldn't--
543
00:20:18,391 --> 00:20:20,741
I couldn't have done that
if I had postnatal depression,
544
00:20:20,871 --> 00:20:21,785
could I?
545
00:20:21,916 --> 00:20:22,873
-No, no.
-No.
546
00:20:23,004 --> 00:20:24,310
Of course not.
547
00:20:24,440 --> 00:20:25,441
ALLY: Do you know she's gonna beeight weeks tomorrow?
548
00:20:25,572 --> 00:20:27,138
Oh, my God, it's so lovely
to be back at work.
549
00:20:27,269 --> 00:20:28,227
-[phone chiming]
-Can you shut the fuck up?
550
00:20:28,357 --> 00:20:29,880
Shut the fuck up!
It's my breastfeeding app.
551
00:20:30,011 --> 00:20:31,534
It keeps going ping, ping,
ping, ping, ping!
552
00:20:31,665 --> 00:20:34,450
I'm trying to wean her
off my boobs and onto formula.
553
00:20:34,581 --> 00:20:36,104
Do you think
she's gonna be okay?
554
00:20:37,105 --> 00:20:38,498
Oh, yes. Yes.
555
00:20:38,628 --> 00:20:40,804
Because formula's, like,
basically dust, right,
556
00:20:40,935 --> 00:20:43,416
and who--who would feed
their baby dust?
557
00:20:43,546 --> 00:20:45,113
Sorry.
558
00:20:45,244 --> 00:20:46,984
It's fine.
I'm completely fine.
559
00:20:47,115 --> 00:20:50,249
What are we doing?
What--what's the job?
560
00:20:50,379 --> 00:20:51,337
Um...
561
00:20:51,467 --> 00:20:54,122
[quirky music]
562
00:20:54,253 --> 00:20:56,951
♪
563
00:20:57,081 --> 00:20:58,039
DARREN: All right, love.
564
00:20:58,169 --> 00:21:03,436
♪
565
00:21:03,566 --> 00:21:05,960
Okay, which one are you?
566
00:21:06,090 --> 00:21:07,266
Okay.
567
00:21:08,745 --> 00:21:10,921
Uh, what time do you call this?
568
00:21:11,052 --> 00:21:12,183
Have you got any drugs?
569
00:21:12,314 --> 00:21:13,402
'Cause I need to smoke
some drugs.
570
00:21:13,533 --> 00:21:15,361
What makes you think
I smoke drugs?
571
00:21:16,579 --> 00:21:17,580
Mm...
572
00:21:17,711 --> 00:21:19,495
Yeah, well, as it happens,
573
00:21:19,626 --> 00:21:23,412
I may have a small nugget ofmedicinal Red Leb on my person.
574
00:21:23,543 --> 00:21:25,371
-Cool.
-All right...[muttering]
575
00:21:25,501 --> 00:21:27,373
♪
576
00:21:27,503 --> 00:21:29,549
[exhaling]
577
00:21:29,679 --> 00:21:32,247
♪
578
00:21:32,378 --> 00:21:34,205
[coughing]
579
00:21:34,336 --> 00:21:37,252
Oh, my God,
drugs are so disappointing.
580
00:21:37,948 --> 00:21:40,386
Now, listen, father hat on,
581
00:21:40,516 --> 00:21:41,300
about the mortgage,
582
00:21:41,430 --> 00:21:42,344
the house business...
583
00:21:42,475 --> 00:21:43,737
How do you know about that?
584
00:21:43,867 --> 00:21:45,434
I may have overheard.
585
00:21:45,565 --> 00:21:48,611
You didn't run the taps
during that chat.
586
00:21:48,742 --> 00:21:50,526
Paul has a point.
587
00:21:50,657 --> 00:21:53,355
After Ava was born,
you were a little preoccupied.
588
00:21:53,486 --> 00:21:55,618
But he's saying that I had
postnatal depression.
589
00:21:55,749 --> 00:21:57,316
-You did.
-Fuck off!
590
00:21:57,446 --> 00:21:59,187
No, I think it runs
in the family.
591
00:21:59,318 --> 00:22:01,537
Your mom had it too,
with you.
592
00:22:01,668 --> 00:22:02,756
[chuckles]
593
00:22:02,886 --> 00:22:06,760
When you came out,you were this sweet troglodyte.
594
00:22:08,457 --> 00:22:10,546
They used to put all the babiesin one big room
595
00:22:10,677 --> 00:22:13,070
at the hospital
in those days.
596
00:22:13,201 --> 00:22:16,900
And Leah insisted they'd
swapped her real baby for you.
597
00:22:17,031 --> 00:22:19,425
"This is not my baby!
Is this even a baby?"
598
00:22:19,555 --> 00:22:22,515
Crying, lashing out.
599
00:22:22,645 --> 00:22:25,474
This is strangely comforting.
600
00:22:25,605 --> 00:22:28,477
Well, of course,
now it's postnatal depression,
601
00:22:28,608 --> 00:22:30,349
but back then,
602
00:22:30,479 --> 00:22:33,264
you had to just shut up
and pretend to be happy,
603
00:22:33,395 --> 00:22:35,092
even if you had birthed
a monster.
604
00:22:35,223 --> 00:22:36,877
But Mum never told me.
605
00:22:37,007 --> 00:22:40,054
Hmm, well, she probably
wanted to spare your feelings.
606
00:22:41,621 --> 00:22:44,493
[both laughing]
607
00:22:44,624 --> 00:22:51,457
♪
608
00:22:53,633 --> 00:22:56,244
-God, she was so cute.
-Mm-hmm.
609
00:22:56,375 --> 00:22:58,638
ALLY: All I saw back then
was a fat Polish plumber
610
00:22:58,768 --> 00:23:01,031
with a really flat head.
611
00:23:01,162 --> 00:23:02,642
Tried to tell you
that rhombus-shaped skulls
612
00:23:02,772 --> 00:23:04,426
run in our family.
613
00:23:06,472 --> 00:23:08,822
Okay, let's just say
for argument's sake
614
00:23:08,952 --> 00:23:12,478
that I was...
a little bit distracted.
615
00:23:12,608 --> 00:23:13,566
Mm-hmm.
616
00:23:13,696 --> 00:23:14,436
Why couldn't you talk to me
about it?
617
00:23:14,567 --> 00:23:15,829
And say what?
618
00:23:15,959 --> 00:23:18,135
"Oi, Ally,
you leaking nut-job,
619
00:23:18,266 --> 00:23:19,833
get a grip,
or I'll sell the house."
620
00:23:19,963 --> 00:23:22,052
-Mm...
-[sighs] Sorry.
621
00:23:22,183 --> 00:23:24,881
-It's all right.
-[sighs]
622
00:23:25,012 --> 00:23:26,317
Mum and Dad saw
your wedding album.
623
00:23:26,448 --> 00:23:28,145
Ooh.
624
00:23:28,276 --> 00:23:30,539
I tried to explain that marriageisn't a big deal for us,
625
00:23:30,670 --> 00:23:31,540
but you know
how they are.
626
00:23:31,671 --> 00:23:32,715
It isn't a big deal.
627
00:23:32,846 --> 00:23:34,195
Hmm, absolutely,
628
00:23:34,456 --> 00:23:37,677
but they were on about the
whole fucking marrying thing.
629
00:23:37,807 --> 00:23:39,374
You know, us getting married.
630
00:23:39,505 --> 00:23:41,332
No, but you told them
that we weren't bothered,
631
00:23:41,463 --> 00:23:42,682
we've got kids?
632
00:23:42,812 --> 00:23:45,946
And...we're not bothered
about being married, are we?
633
00:23:46,076 --> 00:23:47,382
Mm-mm.
634
00:23:48,557 --> 00:23:49,558
Do you know what?
635
00:23:51,560 --> 00:23:53,606
Actually, hang on.
636
00:23:53,736 --> 00:23:56,435
I'm just gonna take...this one,
637
00:23:56,565 --> 00:23:58,349
'cause I look
really, really fit.
638
00:23:58,480 --> 00:24:00,700
[both laugh]
639
00:24:00,830 --> 00:24:02,179
-Love you.
-Love you.
640
00:24:11,798 --> 00:24:13,539
Liam.
641
00:24:15,149 --> 00:24:19,632
Greasy cunt
married to my Ally.
642
00:24:20,633 --> 00:24:22,548
I didn't see any of that.
643
00:24:23,810 --> 00:24:28,467
♪
644
00:24:28,597 --> 00:24:30,207
[door closes]
645
00:25:14,730 --> 00:25:16,993
Captioned by Captionmax
646
00:25:19,518 --> 00:25:21,607
Pulling hair is wrong, mate.
647
00:25:21,650 --> 00:25:25,001
I mean, all violence is wrong,but at least punching's a sport.
648
00:25:25,045 --> 00:25:26,742
-Is it?
-Yes, boxing.
649
00:25:26,873 --> 00:25:28,614
Boxing's in the Olympics.
Hair pulling isn't.
650
00:25:29,876 --> 00:25:32,966
-It would be funny if it was.-It really would be.
651
00:25:39,407 --> 00:25:41,801
-I'm a
once-in-a-generation artist.
-Oh.
652
00:25:41,844 --> 00:25:44,978
Who just got verified
on Twitter, about,
what, nine days ago?
653
00:25:45,021 --> 00:25:47,328
I'm glad you feel good
that a robot told you
you're worth it.
654
00:25:47,458 --> 00:25:48,590
♪ Hi, I'm Dave ♪
655
00:25:55,858 --> 00:25:56,990
Oh, damn!
656
00:25:57,033 --> 00:25:58,469
[classical music playing]
657
00:26:08,001 --> 00:26:09,829
MAN: This is your station.
658
00:26:09,872 --> 00:26:13,006
But... what am I
actually doing here?
659
00:26:13,049 --> 00:26:14,790
I'm not gonna tell you.
660
00:26:14,834 --> 00:26:17,358
Don't worry.
You're gonna figure it out.
661
00:26:27,673 --> 00:26:31,677
-[thunderclap]-GUILLERMO: The room was pale,like her radiating skin.
662
00:26:31,720 --> 00:26:36,159
She was hungry for blood,but starved for companionship.
663
00:26:36,290 --> 00:26:38,814
As she ran her hands
down his britches,
664
00:26:38,945 --> 00:26:41,077
-it was clear
all of his blood...
-Oh.
665
00:26:41,121 --> 00:26:44,690
-...had collected justin a certain part of his body.-[low growl]
666
00:26:44,733 --> 00:26:48,737
-[chuckles]
-She was going to relish
draining him.
667
00:26:48,781 --> 00:26:51,087
Take the coffin!
668
00:26:52,741 --> 00:26:54,090
[squeaking]
669
00:26:55,614 --> 00:26:56,832
[bats squeaking]
46920
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