Original subtitles

? A new day dawns in the wild wild west ?

? When a school will discover Who will be the best ?

? And you know when the going gets tough ?

? Mikey's gonna dig down And use the right stuff ?

? 'Cause if you wanna play handball ?

? Then you gotta give it your all ?

? Come on ?

? 'Cause if you wanna play handball ?

? You gotta think big, not small ?

? If you wanna play handball ?

? Then you gotta play hardball ?

Aloha, do you want to be awesome?

Then listen up.

I'm Gary Garrison, air-guitar legend,

singer and World Handball Champion.

Now when I'm not in Hawaii

polishing my trophies,

oh yeah, real crystal.

I run workshops to show you the key

to handball success.

Whether it's working on technique,

learning a new move,

or exploding a ball with raw power!

I can take you from handball zero to hero.

Hero, hero, hero.

So book now, 1-300-HANDBALL

He sure loves an explosion.

You're so lucky bro.

Yes.

Butterfield Primary have very kindly

flown Mr Garrison over to run today's workshop

for SASI-WESTS-HAT.

- So cool. - Where's Lilly?

Dance recital.

Good for her.

I thought we might take this opportunity

to discuss my expectations for today.

You'll be on site at Butterfield,

Western Sydney's most elite primary school.

It's super posh.

They eat cucumber sandwiches

and say "How do you do?"

And call a toilet a water closet.

Why not just say toilet?

Because they're refined bro.

I heard they have a helicopter pad.

They have two and as you'd know Tiffany,

the best and brightest flock there.

Trust me Mz, it's not all it's cracked up to be.

Block Street's a much better school.

Well thank you.

That said, I don't want any of you doing

anything that might bring the school into disrepute.

I won't do anything bad.

It's not you I'm worried about.

There'll be a local news crew present.

Skux, we're gonna be on TV.

It's paramount we put our best foot forward.

And remember to be kind, caring and courteous.

What if kind started with a "c"?

Then you could say the "three c's".

That would be a pretty choice poster for your office.

Yes. Yes it would.

Mz, Jerry and Salwa aren't playing at SASI's,

why are they here?

On that, the guidelines state

that one coach from each school will be permitted

to attend the workshop.

One.

But there's two of us.

Rules are rules.

Sad. Well at least one of you can come.

I mean, I could have brought a coach,

but I don't need one.

I'm doing fine without a coach, okay?

You go Salwa.

Nah, you.

I insist.

Nah, I do.

Ugh! Just do rock, paper, scissors, okay?

Good idea.

Rock, paper, scissors, shoot.

Be a sponge Mahaki.

[upbeat music]

After you.

Thanks, okay?

What? I'm being KCC.

[orchestra playing]

[car engine starts]

[orchestra continues playing]

How do you do?

Welcome to Butterfield College.

[both] How do you do?

Don't mind if I do.

Thank you.

How many people are coming?

All the participants were invited, so�

I wasn't asking you.

Bro, KCC.

No way. It is you!

Oh, wow.

So great to see you. I totally missed you.

Jeff!

Oh, sorry.

These kids are strangely familiar.

Been a long time.

Yeah.

Do you go here?

Yep. Student Rep.

Hoping for school captain down the track.

Name's Beatrice Rockford.

Oh, heard about you.

Only good things I hope.

How's things?

Good, great, groovy.

Didn't know schools like yours

came to things like this.

Actually, my Dads are sponsoring the tournament.

Cute. Tiff used to go here.

Didn't she?

Yeah.

We were besties, weren't we?

Not really.

Ouch. Honesty session.

Why'd you leave school again Tiff?

Hey, chill out eh.

I'm having fun.

But it takes two to tango.

Firstly, I don't dance.

Secondly, not quite getting it.

Thirdly, morning tea time.

See you on the courts Tiff. Can't wait.

[orchestra playing]

[rock music]

Whoa!

Yeah!

Guys, clump up.

Clump up. I'm gonna do a thing,

you'll love it.

Clump up! Wooh!

Clump up!

Okay, everyone on their feet.

On their feet everyone.

Wooh!

We're standing. We're standing. And now we're sitting.

Wipe out!

Okay, just watch.

Wooh!

Yeah!

Wooh!

Okay, cut the music.

Cut the music.

Cut the music, just cut it.

Okay. Hello everyone.

I'm Gary Garrison.

And today is the day you go

from zero to hero!

Wooh!

Yeah!

Shoot me from this side guys.

Shoot me from this side.

Ah hem.

Is he legit?

He's weird but he's a legend.

Where's Tiff?

Who cares? Have you forgot what she did to me?

Just scratching beneath the surface you know.

Don't waste your time.

Maybe leopards can change their spots.

I can't believe you're hanging out with her.

This is a handball bootcamp with people in SASI's

I'm in SASI's. She's in SASI's.

We're all in SASI's.

She's wiped.

Can we just have fun today and not

get all intense and stuff?

Fine.

Where was I?

Oh yeah, that's right.

Stop stuffing your faces and we'll get into it.

And maybe one day, you can win yourself one of these.

[kids gasping]

- Whoa - Yeah.

Doubt yours will be as awesome as Charlene.

That's her name. That's her name.

Do you wanna hear an awesome story

about how cool she is?

- Yeah! - Yes!

I said, you wanna hear a story

about how awesome she is?

[kids shouting]

Yeah!

I bought her an extra seat on the plane from Hawaii

just so she didn't have to travel

in the overhead luggage.

Okay, this one is called "confronting the shadow".

Mikey, get up here.

That's you, mate. Get up here.

What's gonna happen is,

Mikey's gonna throw the ball.

You're all going to get out of the way.

If he hits you, you're out.

Last one standing wins.

Dodgeball, cool!

How dare you?

What?

Do you think I won Charlene

by playing games like dodgeball?

No.

Apology accepted.

Okay.

And�

[whistle blows]

Sorry Tiff.

Whatever.

You're out.

You okay?

Dodgeball's dumb.

[upbeat music]

Oh! Out.

Good one, Mikey!

Out.

Out.

Out!

Sorry.

Bye bye.

Ah bad luck. Good one, Mikey!

Good one.

Oh. See the nurse about� Yeah.

Out.

Out. You're out.

Mikey, nice power.

And for the rest of you, pathetic.

Sorry guys.

[cheerful music]

Care for a cucumber sandwich?

I will, thank you.

Um, excuse me.

Yes, how do you do?

Where is the toilet?

Oh you mean the water closet?

Yes.

Right there.

Cheers bro.

Yes, cheers�

Bro

The news wanna interview us, come on.

Nice to meet you Peggy.

Pick this up later.

Thanks. Mikey is it?

That's me.

Just gonna ask you a couple of questions,

pretend the camera's not here.

Easy as.

Okay. Three, two, one and.

I'm here with Tiffany and Mikey,

two squad members from Blocks Street Primary.

So Tiffany, we'll start with you.

Big handball tournament around the corner,

how are we feeling?

Yeah, pretty excited thanks.

Um.

We are.

I am Tiffany.

Okay, we'll go again from the top.

Bit nervous, are we?

That's okay.

So Tiffany, big handball tournament coming up,

how are we feeling?

It's sweet to be here.

Looking forward to Mr Garrison.

Hope we can learn some new skills later.

I wanna be bad and by bad I mean good.

Charming.

But in the end there can only be one winner.

Any tension?

Not really. I'm pretty chill.

I mean it'll be sweet to win and stuff

but challenging myself is even sweeter.

Wise beyond your years.

Cut.

My approach requires thinking outside the box.

Striking first.

Whoa!

Like a viper.

Yeah?

May I go to the water closet?

- The what? - The toilet.

Why wouldn't you just say toilet?

Um, can I?

Yeah, you may. But don't come back.

But�

No. Out.

Now in this game talent can only get you so far.

What else do you need?

Pig tails.

It's actually a side pony and my name's Tiffany.

What's two minus two, Tiffany?

- Zero. - Correct.

That's how much I care about your hair.

Now I repeat.

In this game, what else do you need?

Luck?

Close, but no.

Um,

Shoot.

Commitment?

Correct.

Can you really explode a ball?

I can.

Can you show us?

Not yet.

Okay, this next one is an exercise

to help you find your flow.

Where's it from?

Ah, thank you.

A buddy of mine from Abu Dhabi taught me this

at the Regional Air-guitar Championships in Dubbo.

[kids gasping]

Turn off your brain.

Find your flow.

What's that mean?

Whatever you want it to mean.

[rock music playing over boombox]

[bell rings]

Hey, GG.

Thanks for the AMA.

What's AMA?

Ask me anything.

Everyone gets an AMA. You're not special.

You've got two minutes.

Can you teach him, a top spin,

back spin combo.

That's ridiculous.

What can you teach him?

I don't know.

I thought this was a master class?

Listen, kid.

Handball's not like building blocks, okay?

It's not one size fits all.

It's more like painting a dream scape.

Blindfolded with some old paints

you got from the bottom drawer.

It's got to come from within.

I felt that when I was finding my flow.

Right on brother.

I don't get how this is gonna help him in SASI's.

True. I'm crumbs at precision.

How do I change my sledgehammers into darts?

You find your "why", kid.

- My what? - Your "why".

- His "why"? - His "why"?

- Why's that? - Don't ask why you find it.

My "why"?

Exactly.

What's a "why"?

When I won Charlene,

my grandfather, Marlowe, was in a nursing home.

I loved that guy more than bubble tea.

Every time I hit the ball,

every training sesh, every moment of doubt.

His love guided me.

[cries]

He was my "why".

You've gotta find your "why", kid.

Want a hug bro?

No. Just leave.

Leave. Go.

Get out of here.

Okay guys, regroup.

Regrouping.

Okay, now what else do you need?

Self-belief.

No. But points for enthusiasm.

Endurance.

This guy is on fire.

Yes. A buddy of mine taught me this next one

in the Guatemalan jungle.

You run back and forth until I say stop

and no it's not a shuttle run.

[whistle blows]

Go. Go. Go. Go. Go. Go.

The end line, the end line, the end line.

Go. Let's go mate, let's go.

We can do it mate.

Go. Go. Go. Go. Go. Go. Go.

Go. Go. Go. Go. Go. Go. Go.

Come on rogues. Let's go mate.

Let's go. We can do it.

Come on Mikey, let's move it.

Come on Mikey! Let's go.

Okay, everybody pair up and grab a balloon.

Hey. Um, mind if we�

Sweet.

If it touches the ground, you're out.

Hey GG, where's this one from?

A space station on the galaxy's outer rim?

I like this kid.

Actually, no. It's from my third birthday.

All right!

[whistle blows]

[guitar solo]

What did GG say to you at your AMA?

This and that, you?

We just ran around the stupid oval.

He was on his phone half the time.

Dang.

Did he show you how to explode the ball?

No.

Teach you any secret moves?

That would be secret eh.

Tell me, okay.

Ugh, go get some sushi.

I will. I'm actually really hungry,

so my idea, not yours.

Great work on the interview.

Thanks.

I was here first.

It's my school.

So?

So it's my sushi.

[music intensifies]

You know what?

I'm not gonna play your games, okay?

I'm gonna play ball, handball that is.

Yeah, I got that.

Good, look forward to it.

Same.

- Great. - Groovy.

Sushi's dumb.

How was it?

[loud guitar]

Right. Now we are all winners here today.

But there is one kid who has managed

to impress me with some pretty tip top tude.

Mikey, it's you mate. Get up here.

Well done. Yeah!

Thanks.

I know he keeps calling me Micky.

I just don't want to tell him

because I don't want him to feel bad.

Okay, let me, let me put this badge on you here.

There you go.

And there's your badge.

Yeah! Nice one.

Choice badge bro.

Ahh, mega choice.

Now remember, it's not just always about having skills,

it's about being awesome and always giving it your all.

Thank you.

[slow clapping]

[intense music]

[glass crashing]

[kids gasping]

Charlene!

No�!

GG, stop!

GG!

I'm so sorry bro.

It's okay.

No, like I'm really sorry.

I heard you.

It was an accident.

I'd never do that to someone on purpose.

Especially someone like you.

Ugh, kid.

Charlene cost me like three bucks

from the two dollar store down the road.

Then why'd you run away?

For the news crews.

You know, get some likes, some shares, some re-posts.

But you bought her a plane ticket.

No way would I bring the real deal

all the way from Hawaii.

Come on.

For real?

Banana peel.

What?

Well we used to say that when I was a kid. We used to say, "Real real banana peel".

Oh.

You've never heard of that before?

Never mind.

Can you really explode a ball?

I can.

Can you show me?

[explosion]

Whoa!

[soft acoustic music]

Is it a baddy Daddy?

Nothing a little RICER can't fix.

For those of you who don't know,

RICER is for treating sports injuries.

It stands for Rest, Ice, Compression,

Elevation and Referral.

Daddy's a RICER-holic.

Sweet badge, boy.

Chur.

You're doing well.

Yeah, just gotta find my "why"

and I'll be sweet.

Eh?

Oh just something a buddy from Hawaii

told me about grandpa Marlowe and his pals.

Oh, get the TV. It's time boy.

Turn it on. Record it for Auntie.

Retro as.

[News reader] Good evening.

Our top story tonight,

a young westie wannabe goes feral,

smashing a priceless artifact.

What started out as a fun day,

ended as a horror film when young boy Micky,

from Block Street Primary, went on a rampage.

Gary Garrison, the international handball darling,

was clearly devastated.

[TV clicks]

[phone ringing]

Hello?

[voice speaking over the phone]

It's Mz Crapper.

[tense Music]

What kind of tree can you hold in your hand?

A Palm Tree!

Funny, indeed.

? Hardball ?

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