Original subtitles

? A new day dawns in the wild wild west ?

? When a school will discover Who will be the best ?

? And you know when the going gets tough ?

? Mikey's gonna dig down And use the right stuff ?

? 'Cause if you wanna play handball ?

? Then you gotta give it your all ?

? Come on ?

? 'Cause if you wanna play handball ?

? You gotta think big, not small ?

? If you wanna play handball ?

? Then you gotta play hardball ?

So, Mahaki, have you made your decision?

Yeah, bro, I have.

- What's it gonna be? - I'm in.

That's what I like to hear.

Mahaki, you are now the chosen one.

What you have is power.

What you lack is precision.

You're a wild stallion.

Now, we tame you.

What are you?

A wild stallion.

- What do you have? - Power!

- What do you need? - Precision!

Then let's make it happen!

[Screams]

Focus, Mahaki.

[inspirational music]

Push it, Mahaki.

Precision, Mahaki, precision.

Wipe those tears.

[cans clunking]

15 seconds.

[upbeat music]

What's that stink?

Oh, eggs, I was practicing precision.

How was training?

It was sweet as.

I'm getting better, right?

Absolutely.

Mikey told me about Howie.

- He did? - Yeah.

Haven't heard that legend before.

Ah, yes.

Well, it's a recent discovery.

He's ace, Auntie.

Howie, the Handball Hero.

People need inspiration, eh?

That they do, Auntie Mahaki.

Truth is you can put unleaded in a diesel car,

it might run for a bit, but eventually it needs diesel.

Yes, but sometimes all you have is unleaded.

But you leave it in there long enough you'll damage the engine.

I understand.

Well, at least he understands,

'cause I have no idea what she's talking about.

And yeah, I smell like eggs.

[upbeat guitar music]

How does it feel?

Good actually, yeah, good.

Good.

We have exactly one week 'til the battle of Block Street.

- Epic. =If you can gain a spot in the top three,

you're going straight to SASI-WESTS-HAT.

[slow peaceful music]

Okay, 5B.

What is the main ingredient in carrot cake?

Yes?

- Cake. - Really?

Jokes, It's carrot, Mr. Bum.

That's Mr. Butt�, Muvasa.

Congratulations, you're on manure duty.

[pupils wooing]

Settle down.

Now, carrots don't appear by magic.

They start off looking like this.

And from little things, big things grow.

And with a little care and manure,

this will grow into a carrot, and we can add some cake to it,

and then what do we have?

[Pupils] Carrot cake.

[Mr. Butt�] Exactly. Ah, yes, Mikey?

How long does it take to grow a carrot?

Oh, about three months.

But remember, nothing worth doing is ever fast or easy.

If it takes two months to grow a carrot, how am I gonna be awesome in one week?

One day at a time, Mahaki.

One day at a time.

Thanks bro.

I bet Howie'd get awesome in one day.

Who's Howie?

Son of Maui.

An ancient Kiwi handball hero.

Pssssst.

I saw you name on the rego board.

Ah, yeah.

You really think you have a chance?

I don't know.

He does.

There's only three spots.

One, two, three.

We're the team, so don't even bother, okay?

Yeah, don't waste your time, okay?

Follow you dreams, I say.

Lance.

Just because your dads run the tournament.

Just 'cause you got banned.

Just because you're a lying princess.

Just because you're not.

You want some?

That would be a bad decision.

Listen to your friend, okay?

This isn't the time for a poo fight.

Nice bun by the way.

Don't, don't.

No, let's walk it off.

She's not worth it.

[upbeat music]

You're off.

Come on!

No body shots.

You cannot be serious.

Get out, McEnroe.

We need a new player.

Mikey!

You're not ready.

We just trained, I'm feeling ace.

You need more time.

Bro, I got this.

[upbeat music]

Precision, Mikey, precision.

What is he doing?

Getting ahead of himself.

Precision.

- Nice bun by the way. - Whatever.

[swoosh]

Kid's god power, but no preciseness.

My offer still stands.

With you out, we could train him together.

I don't see what you see in him.

Plus, your brother is going to prove Tiffany sent that video.

We tell Crapper, she lifts my ban, I can play.

Have a nice day, ha-ha.

Nice hair, Salwa, love the bun.

Lance, less talking, more walking.

- Bye. - Bye.

We're out of balls.

You know, if Mikey had a spot in the top three,

that would really grind Tiff's gears.

[scoffs] You're like a dog with a bone.

You know, I can't train him alone.

Together, we could give him a real shot.

I don't know.

You know,

I did some research last night,

and I found an ancient Lebanese legend that I think you might find interesting.

That "Howie, Son of Maui" stuff may work on Mikey,

but not on me.

Now I smell like an egg poo sandwich.

It's not so bad.

What are you guys talking about?

Nothing, let's go see Kevin.

Yeah, why not?

[intercom beeping]

[Kevin] Speak.

[Jerry] It's me.

[Kevin] What's the password?

Jerry loves fluffy teddies.

[Kevin laughing]

[door lock buzzing]

Well, well, well,

if it isn't the three musketeers.

Have you traced the phone yet?

[stammers] Yes.

You have?

No, no, I haven't.

But you promised.

Well, I didn't account for blowfish encryption.

- What fish? - Oh, it's like talking to kids.

Okay, baby talk time.

It's like a super-duper, really, really, hard password.

I can figure it out, but it'll take a while.

- How long? - Look at it this way,

if there were an armor of computer wizards working for me

with tech that hasn't even been invented yet, it'd take�

Seven thousand four hundred and eighty three years.

That's a long time.

Yeah.

So, your only hope is to find the phone that send the video

and check its history.

You guys dig it, do you get it?

Dig what I'm, dig it?

We don't have the phone.

Your problem, not mine. Vamoose.

What did you win?

[scoffs] Ah, you know, that's just a not a big deal.

I was an E-sports god.

Played in tournaments everywhere,

the world was mine, and then I got too old.

That, plus my fizzy drink obsession started to spiral out of control.

Lost track of who I was.

If we don't leave now, we'll be here all lunch.

- [Kevin] My family-- - Good point.

Didn't recognize me.

[sombre electronic drum beat]

Everybody leaves in the end.

I can't wait three months. We have to find Tiff's phone.

It's not that easy.

I swear, if I see Tiff, I'm gonna--

You're gonna what?

Where's your phone?

No idea what you're talking about.

Just getting some refreshing H2O, you know.

Hydration is super-important.

So is honesty.

Oh, boom.

Pow.

[imitating gun sounds, explosions]

I know you sent the video.

I can just feel it in my gut.

Graphic.

I'll find your phone, get the proof,

then the truth will come out.

Without proof, you've got diddlysquat.

- Diddly-what? - Squat, zilcheroo.

- Zilcher-who? - Roo, zip, nought, nix, nada.

You've got nothing.

[scoffs] How do you sleep at night?

Inside my air-conditioned room, tucked into my princess doona,

with Ricky and Martin, my two fluffy cavoodles,

and the knowledge that you'll never prove I sent it

because my phone is destroyed, okay?

Did you just say what I think you said?

No, I definitely did not.

She totes did� not.

I think that was pretty much a confession, Tiff.

Lance.

[Mr. Butt�] Attention, attention.

A phone has been found in a rubbish bin.

It's pink with crystals, and it has a screensaver

of what looks like two adorable cavoodles.

Ah, Ricky and Mark

Ah, Martin.

Oh, Ricky Martin, funny.

Anyhoo, could the owner of this phone

please collect it from the lost property after school?

Who's the diddly-squat now?

[imitating gun sounds]

? Yeah ?

[imitating gun sounds]

Psst, psst, psst.

We need to get out of here and get Tiff's phone.

I got it.

- Miss? - Yes?

- Can I-- - No.

Next idea.

I could pretend to faint, and while everybody's freaking out,

you two sneak out, full undercover Commando style,

and grab it.

There's something in that.

Uncle Albert says I'm a sweet actor.

Miss Crapper, Mikey, Jerry and Salwa are talking.

It's literally annoying, okay?

Final warning.

Yes?

Miss Crapper, permission to use the ladies please?

Granted, take a buddy.

Of course, you're the best.

Three minutes or else.

Yes, Miss.

I can't believe it, they're going to get it before us.

Outfoxed by a cunning fox.

- This could still work in our favor. - How?

You'll have three minutes to get to the office.

Which is two minutes there and back,

leaving only one minute to search for the phone.

Plenty of time, right? Wrong.

There are three lost property boxes.

Why? Poor planning.

The lost property box is stashed high out of reach.

You'll need to work in twos to access them.

I'd estimate the one minute you have

will be just enough time to search one room.

Probability says they've got a two in three chances

of selecting the wrong room.

If you arrive as they're selecting their room,

you can eliminate that room,

leaving only two rooms,

bringing your room chance to one in two.

What Jerry is trying to say is

there are three rooms and we need two people

to access the boxes so we can't split up.

Meaning, we only have time to check one room.

Jerry had more detail, and that's cool.

Best of both worlds.

Okay.

Over to you.

Sick.

Miss, I left my book in the quad.

Get it later.

But it's reading time, what am I meant to read?

- Tone. - Sorry Miss.

Fine, take a buddy.

Three minutes.

May the Howie be with you.

[Salwa] Hurry up, bro.

We have to choose the right one.

Fate is sweet to you if you're good.

Move it, Mikey!

[dramatic music]

Whoa, whoa, whoa, hey, guys!

Hey, just getting my book from the quad, Mrs. Bum.

It's Miss Bahm.

Oh, sorry, Miss.

That's okay.

No running in the halls.

Yep, it's just a really good book.

Okay then, on your way.

[both] Bye, Miss Bahm.

[digital timer ticking fast]

[Jerry] You'll be right behind Tiff and Lily,

so stay out of sight, and be as quiet as two mice.

If you have to� go to ground.

Do whatever it takes.

[digital timer ticking fast]

[shoes squeaking]

Ssshh.

[Tiffany] Hurry up, Lily, okay?

[digital timer ticking fast]

That was close.

Too close.

We gotta crawl.

Didn't we just do that?

You want to be seen?

Bro your socks stink.

Soz, couldn't find any freshies.

All right, time is almost up.

They'll have to head back to class or deal with "The Crapper".

Stay on lookout.

I got this.

She's staring at me.

What?

They're looking right at me.

- [phone alarm beeps] - Ugh!

Oh yeah, to let you know, time's up.

All right� which door?

Fifty-fifty, bro, but fate is sweet to you

if you're� that thing you said before.

Let's skip ahead.

Well, we chose the wrong door,

but we made it back with three seconds to spare.

[digital timer ticking fast]

The last few minutes of class were even longer than the time our TV was broken

and my cousins and I had to walk to my other cousin's house

to watch the All Blacks, which was an hour away.

[school bell ringing]

Dismissed.

[intense music]

No running!

[pupils screaming]

Come on, Salwa, Come on!

- Tiff! - Give it.

[Tiffany] You're dreaming.

Phone, the phone, does it work?

[breathe]

Got your phone.

Extra garlic for lunch, just the way you like it, a-ha.

[phone screen shattering]

Better luck, next time.

Lily, Lance, leaving now!

? Yeah ?

Oi!

You know what? Tiffany's been getting her way for way too long.

I'll help train you, but you'd better give a hundred percent or else.

Sounds a bit intense.

Or else!

Mahaki, the stage is set.

Feels like I'm in my own TV show, eh?

You can write your own ending.

Yeah.

[imitating explosion sounds]

[airplanes]

Cuppa?

[Daddy] What you got an egg for, boy?

I finally caught one.

- Huh? - This arvo,

I was practicing precision, and I finally caught one.

Good work, boy, I think.

Hey Daddy,

you heard the saying fortune favors those that are

- Brave? - No.

- Bold? - No.

Fortune favors those that, the good and stuff.

That's not a saying, boy.

But it's a strong moral code.

Hey Daddy,

today, the baddies won, and they had no moral thingy.

And, well, the goodies, we got our butts kicked.

What happens in the schoolyard or footy field doesn't matter.

At the end of the day, it's your principles,

the way you hold yourself and the way you treat others

that will be remembered.

Kia-kaha, boy, be strong, always,

even when it's the hard option.

Didn't know you could talk that much, eh?

How cold is that?

Colder than Santa's workshop.

Kia-kaha, Daddy.

[Daddy laughing]

That's hard-out cold.

You're a crazy man, Daddy.

Guess I've always got a way to go, eh?

[Auntie] Who's eaten all my eggs?

[both laughing]

Better go clean that up.

[upbeat music]

What kind of dog do jewellery stores sell?

? Hardball ?

? Hardball ?

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