Original subtitles

This programme contains strong language

What would you do if civilisation came to an end?

Hello?!

In a radical experiment...

Is anybody there?

...two groups of ordinary men and women...

I can't believe that we're doing this.

BERTIE CALLS

...are attempting to survive for 28 days

in an abandoned American town

used to train the military in urban warfare.

Good morning, Vietnam.

How will they cope in a battle for scarce resources?

It's been ransacked. Oh, my God.

That's war. They're coming up the wall! Bertie!

Ooh! You OK?

DEAN SCREAMS

Can they rebuild society from scratch...

No light, no food, no phones, no nothing.

That's it.

We're desperate. STEVEN GRUNTS

...and make it through...

...the apocalypse? SURVIVORS SHOUT

Help!

SURVIVOR SCREAMS

I've never, ever had a problem like I've had a problem with you.

I said, "I know it's your personality."

You're a liar! You're a liar!

You are a liar! What the hell is your problem?

No, the spam. SHE GASPS

We didn't even have any of it.

Dinnertime!

Hi. Hi. I'm Brooke. Kyra.

If you decide that you are wanting to take me in,

I'll have my bags packed tomorrow and I'll be waiting.

Don't mention that I've been here. We won't say anything.

The wanderer returns.

You went and saw them?

Yeah. I don't deal with traitors very lightly.

That's when you cross the line with me.

She needs to be banished!

DEAN SNORES

Oh, my goodness.

We're freezing.

For the last two days,

the West Side have been suffering subzero temperatures

and are failing to properly heat the laundry.

I was little spoon, then I was the big spoon,

then I was the middle spoon.

"Do you want to spoon me or shall I spoon you, mate?"

And I was like, "Uh, I don't mind."

He was like, "Turn around."

I was like, "OK."

We went through a lot of wood last night.

Is it worth if I grab a little bit of... Wood. ..wood,

just to see us going until it gets light, just to warm up,

cos I froze my testes off last night.

But the freezing conditions

aren't the only struggle for the group.

Brooke and Kelly had another barney,

which was awful.

I should've stepped in there

because she was just screaming, shouting at Kelly,

and it wasn't nice at all.

We're just havoc. We're just pure havoc.

When that happened yesterday, that situation,

I feel like my pride got in the way.

It's not my intention to be here and argue with anybody.

Like, I think I've been a bit deluded

in thinking that I was going to be in this experience with people

and just get along and just try and survive.

I mean, what possessed her

to just go to another group without authorisation?

I want to see more balls.

I want to see the men taking charge.

This is a symptom of a house that isn't well run.

Good morning, Vietnam.

Going on a little hunt. A little mission. Little mission.

If I feel like I'm not in a good place,

I need to connect, I need to talk.

If I'm feeling bad, you share me a little bit of joy

or just give me a space to talk and, you know, offload.

That's how I like people to treat me.

Right, let's get wood.

My main plan for the day,

just to concentrate on firewood,

because I don't think people realise

how much work it is to get enough firewood

to heat this place up.

Have you checked that?

Despite tensions within the group,

Brooke joins the essential hunt for firewood.

Guys, come, let's stick together. I'm freezing!

With overnight temperatures as low as minus ten degrees,

finding enough to heat their home

is a constant battle.

Ah! My fingers are freezing.

We're in a laundry... like a warehouse.

This place is huge.

And it is freezing.

Most of the walls here are just glass.

Whatever heat we have

is just touching it and then turning cold.

And then we're just burning through fuel

just trying to keep slightly warm here.

My fingers are going to break off.

There's got to be an easier way.

Come on, guys. ♪ Keep the fire burning. ♪

I'm really exhausted, today. I'm really tired, but...

We have no meat, no nothing. We're starving.

Yeah, but...

It's been almost a week

since the East Side group had a decent meal,

and energy levels are critical.

Somebody go and get me some food...

...before I leave.

Morale is bullshit,

cos everyone's tired, hungry and pissed off.

It's cos we got no food,

got no calories,

no energy at all.

What do you want us to do, eat each other?

Do you know what all I can think about at the minute?

Is a strawberry cream Quality Street.

So all I want to do is loot as much as we can,

get it done and sit by the fire.

I agree completely.

I'm past the point of being hungry.

I don't know if anybody's ever felt this,

where you get so hungry

that you're just not hungry anymore.

And I'd just rather sleep all day,

but there's looting to be done.

So I need to get out there and get on it.

While Louise, Bertie and Kyra

search to the west of the school...

We need to open these cupboards.

...Steven and Kiera focus on the houses nearby.

I've got acrylic, latex, enamel gloss, indoor and outdoor paint.

Look at that. Underground station.

Oh, my God!

Mind the gap! Mind the gap.

Ooh! Bag, bag.

What's in the bag? Aw.

Milk formula and wet wipes.

We got everything but fucking food.

Right, you two in there, I'll go to the truck.

Yeah.

I've got something!

What have you found, Lou?

HE GASPS - Is it a gun?! - Take it, take it, - take it. - Is it?

It looks like it.

Got an air rifle in here.

Rambo can go hunting now.

Scott can take this and go and get us some bacon,

hopefully, or a deer, or a squirrel.

Gun is a huge relief

cos it means there is a chance of getting more food.

Cos we've had probably like a meal's worth of calories

over the last seven days.

Ooh!

Oh, is that a hidden room in there?

That is actually kind of scary.

STEVEN GASPS - Oh, my God! - Holy shit!

Pineapple slices and pineapple chunks. I eat this all the time.

I need it.

I say we get a little sweet treat.

Is that what you want to do?

Oh, my God, this is so bad.

What about Kyra and Lou?

I think we just eat this.

And why don't we bring them back and we just eat these?

Yeah. Yeah. Have a sip.

How's it taste? Stop it.

Oh, my God, it's so good.

It was just...

It was so good.

Two slices, 100 calories.

Oh, my God. Oh, my God.

Mm.

Oh, my God.

This is the best thing I've ever eaten.

Oh, my God. I want some more juice. I'm gonna sleep so well tonight.

We ate the whole can between us.

Five slices each.

I need it. Sorry.

It's survival. Don't tell anyone.

♪ We are going on a mission. ♪

♪ Yeah. ♪ Look at us two.

With food stocks on the East Side worryingly low...

We're not going to take shit from these men.

...Kiera and Kyra head to the hospital

for an arranged meeting with the West Side

to suggest the sharing of resources.

We're going to discuss an alliance.

We also want to talk to them about the fact

that they ate our spam for dinner.

Yep, and they're in debt to us.

So if they give us one chicken and rooster,

then we'll be even.

What happens if they decline?

Well, then it's a hostile situation.

♪ Where's your head at, at?

♪ Where's your head at? Ow, ow. ♪

It's the first meeting since Brooke requested to join the East Side

and asked them to keep her visit a secret.

We're keeping our lips tied

in terms of Brooke coming to see us.

Hello. Freddie. Hi. Kiera.

Dean. Nice to meet you, Kiera. Nice to meet you. How you doing? Kyra. Kyra.

Kiera and Kyra. Yeah. Freddie and Dean. Freddie and Dean.

Fredean. Shall we go in somewhere a bit warmer?

Yes. Yeah, it's freezing out here. Amazing. Fantastic.

Nice baseball bat. Thank you.

Would you like a pen and paper, by the way,

so you can write some stuff down or?

Oh. Why not?

And have those. We'd love them. Thank you. Thank you.

Did you grow them yourself?

I did, yes. Aw, lovely. I left them there specifically.

The way that our survival group sees it

is if we can both benefit from each other.

I agree. But I was very, very pissed that you stole my spam.

Yes.

We know that you have possession

of all five chickens. Mm.

To have all five

and to eat our spam

seems a little rough. Mm.

We're happy to just get two of the five, not all three.

If you agree to that, then the alliance is on.

The group is in pretty much agreeance

that an alliance would be better than anything.

That's good to know because I heard beforehand

that you guys didn't want anything to do with us.

Who was that from? Brooke?

What? What? Brooke? Brooke.

Who is she?

Oh. She came over, knocking. I have been out all day.

Oh, I see. Fine. So I don't think we've...

Have you been home or you been out as well?

Mate, I've been inside.

Oh, really? No-one knocked on the door from?

Not from what I know. Oh, OK. Interesting.

Wonderful. Safe travels. Bye, guys. All the best. Thank you. Bye.

Someone's lying.

Whether it's Kyra or Brooke.

I'm obviously not going to make any judgements or decisions

without speaking to Brooke.

Dinner, it's spinach soup.

I'm really looking forward to this.

How long we got?

Aw, minutes.

I want a pie and mash...

...jerk chicken, rice and peas,

bit of mac and cheese, bit of coleslaw...

...or Turkish, chicken shish.

Aw.

Aw, chilli sauce.

Right. Cheers. Cheers, everyone. Cheers.

Thank you, Chef. Thank you, Chef! Thank you, Chef.

Over dinner, Freddie and Dean update the group

on the outcome of the peace talks with the East.

They're still upset about...

...the spam.

They are requesting one male chicken, one female chicken.

Well, my initial thought is,

we can keep our own spoils of the war.

And don't forget, we don't know the conversation

that transpired between them and Brooke.

So from what I gather,

the two girls that we met with

I don't think spoke to Brooke.

That's just... Come on, mate.

Did you ask them not to say anything?

Yeah.

That being said, I don't want to continue to go over old ground.

So... So they can keep a secret from us, then? ..do you see

where I was coming from? They're going to be... yeah.

That's, like, really hurtful

because it was almost as if you've planned to do it behind our backs.

What do you want exactly, Brooke?

I don't know what I want to do.

I don't even know if I want to go to the other side!

I don't trust anyone at the moment.

I don't know what I want to do.

Yes, I went over there, cos I feel like I'm having a shit, shit time.

Well, ask yourself why.

I think if we can't trust our entire team,

is our safety in jeopardy?

I don't know if I can continue with this distrust, arguments,

and bickering between us as a team.

After the revelation

that she tried to keep her trip to the East Side a secret,

Brooke now faces the consequences.

This is when a test of loyalty actually comes to play.

And that's treacherous.

You don't trust me,

you don't obviously get along with me.

I personally can't see this getting any better, to be honest.

I can't see the... yeah, I can't see it, personally.

So what do you want to do with that?

I'm leaving, guys.

Goodbye, Brooke. Good luck. Thank you.

See ya. See ya, Brooke.

Well, Brooke fucked off.

I kind of saw that coming a mile away, though. She wasn't happy.

And look, I'm going to miss her,

but I'm just tired of the arguing.

Every argument that has ever happened has stemmed from Brooke to someone.

That was an awful situation to be part of for everybody.

I mean, obviously it's not what we want to do,

see someone leave.

You know, you need to operate on mutual trust, mutual understanding.

And if that's broken,

then there's no way we can actually move forward.

Survival of the fittest.

That's how you say the fittest survives,

the stupid person gets eaten, basically.

It was just too much. I had to leave.

It was really tough to go in and rely on other people,

which is really sad.

I feel like I had so much more to give.

Yeah, 100%.

To be completely honest,

I think, going forward, I'm incredibly optimistic.

We are now a team of six, and that is the reality of things,

and that is what we must now face.

The apocalypse giveth...

...and the apocalypse taketh.

Morning. How'd you sleep?

It's freezing cold, innit?

Cold.

Is it better by the fire?

Yeah, it's much better by the fire.

But it's like, if we didn't have the fire, we'd be...

...fucked.

I'm tired and I'm hungry.

My legs feel heavy.

As the East Side suffer subzero temperatures,

Scott heads out with their new rifle

to hunt for food.

Little Roger Rabbit's going to get shot in the face and eaten!

I really love animals, but right now,

I could do all sorts to get some animal in my belly.

Praying for rabbit, praying for chicken,

praying for road hog, praying for a miracle.

SCOTT LAUGHS

I'm hoping that I can secure enough meat

to feed myself and a few others.

I've been hunting for quite a few years.

That stems from my son.

My son's name is Henry.

Just a good kid. Just loves his bikes.

Loved hunting, but he also loved the animals as well.

So he was always... yeah,

he would've made a good farmer.

Fuck!

After Scott fails to catch anything to eat...

Shall we go and get the chickens, my dear?

Yes. Let's go.

...Kyra and Laura travel to the West Side

to collect the chickens that were part of their new agreement.

Ah!

CHICKENS BUCK Hello, chick-chick-chickens.

But before they hand them over...

Come here, you big fucker.

...farmer Ioan determines which of the chickens are laying eggs.

You hold the hen upside down like this...

...and there's two hip bones here.

And if they're tight together,

then there's no eggs have passed through.

But if the hipbones are wide,

then eggs are passing through.

Show me the rooster's dick. Let's see.

I've never seen a rooster's dick.

I don't know how to find a rooster's dick.

I haven't got roosters in my shed.

Oh. I've just got all ladies. I'm a ladies' man.

CELIA GASPS They've just weed on you.

Jesus Christ!

Let's clean it. Whoa!

Ah! Disgusting.

Ah!

It's sperm.

It's not sperm. It is sperm.

It's pee. It's just cum on you.

It's not sperm. It's just literally cum.

I'm not even joking.

The bloody thing has just cum on you.

Whatever. Chicken's a chicken, innit?

Hi, guys! Morning! Morning!

Kyra and Laura arrive from the East Side

to collect their chickens.

Oh, beautiful. Aw, thank you. If you've already packaged them.

Yeah, with hay.

Yeah? Yeah. Right then, ladies and gents.

Bye, guys. See you soon.

♪ We got the chickens We got the chickens. ♪

We come bearing gifts. Yes!

Oh, they put them in a box for you? Yeah.

Ah, that's nice of them. When it comes to Brooke,

she's gone.

It's a shame. Successful mission.

We're gonna have eggs consistently.

Like, even to just have one egg a day

is probably more calories and more food

than we've had the entire time.

So I'm so happy with that.

Seems to be quite happy.

We've given them some chickens...

...that doesn't lay eggs.

Three.

Timber.

I am using a lot of calories chopping this wood.

Ooh, that's a heavy boy.

Aw. And when you got zero calories, zero energy,

it just drains you.

The need to transport drinking water from the river...

I'll catch up.

...and the constant demand for wood to heat the laundry

is taking its toll on the West Side.

Fucking hell.

Hands are frozen.

Feels like it's never ending.

My body...

...I feel ruined today.

I mean, there's a bit of fuel in there.

To reduce the burden

of carrying firewood and water by hand,

diesel mechanic Matty

has a plan to repair an old lawnmower

he's found at the stadium south of the laundry.

See if we can get some fuel in the tank

and then in the intake as well.

Give a little bit of pep to start.

If Matt can get the lawnmower running,

that's a game changer.

We'll save so much time and calories and effort.

So yeah, I think that should be a big priority.

It's missing its front-right wheel hub.

I mean, the wheel's got to be somewhere.

I'd love to find...

...where it is.

I'd like to think I'm a jack of all trades but a master of none,

because I've tried my hand at pretty much everything there is.

I was a male dancer when I lived in North Queensland...

...joined the army as a diesel mechanic.

Loved doing that.

If I can find mechanical stuff

that I can repurpose and keep my mind busy,

that's going to be a huge thing for me.

Matt, what you making?

Battery charger.

Can you make a heater for us?

Please, make one...

I mean... ..so we don't have to burn all that wood.

In order to start the lawnmower,

Matty needs a working battery.

So he attempts to charge one

using an old wind turbine and a bicycle.

The theory is, is that, attach them to the thingy, spin it.

And if the volt metre moves...

We're in business.

The thing with being a diesel mechanic is,

if you don't know, you just pretend until you figure it out.

Usually my problems can be solved by just getting a bigger hammer.

Ready? Yep.

You just keep failing forward until something works.

It's working! It works. Yay!

High five. Well done.

I've got to figure out the best place to put the battery.

- Fuck! Aw! - Oh, my God! THEY LAUGH

♪ Hush, little chickie Don't say a word

♪ Steven and Laura are here like a mockingbird

♪ Lots of eggs we want you to lay

♪ Go over there in your bed of hay. ♪

♪ If that mockingbird don't sing

♪ Oh, your neck I'm gonna ring. ♪

It just shat. Aw, it just shat. It just shat.

Fuck you.

Oh well, we tried.

The veg is nearly boiled.

Two turnips in there and two beetroots.

While they wait in vain for eggs from their new chickens,

the East Side are down to the last of their scavenged food.

What else is going in your soup right now? Pigs' feet.

Do you want that? No.

I have a foot phobia.

So anything that says, "Pigs' feet," make me want to vomit.

It's going to be delicious.

Hello?! What's that noise?

Anybody there?!

Hello?! I heard that.

I think it's they're coming to see us. Shh!

Was a voice, weren't it? It was a human voice.

It was a voice, then.

Anybody there?!

Hello?!

Is anybody there?!

A new survivor has entered the East Side of the city,

looking for refuge.

I'm gonna go out. Yeah. Who wants to come? I'll stay here.

I've got the fort.

Hello?!

Mentally, I'm quite resilient.

I'm a bit of a pacifist

when it comes to, like, people conflict.

Hello?! I'm more about, you know, peace and love.

Well, I have done a boxing match before.

It was quite fun to punch someone in the face.

Consensual face punching.

Hello?! Hello!

Hi!

I'm Alex. Hi. Hi.

We're...

...very confused. Yeah. Have you got a group?

No, it's just me. I'm by myself.

I'm Steven. Nice to meet. Steven.

Hi, guys. We're all just a little bit weary

only because... No, it's so fair enough. ..sometimes people come over

from the other group, and we're like, "Who are they?"

My dad is Lord Ivar Mountbatten.

He's cousins to the Queen.

People think, "Oh, you know, she's a posh, rich, royal white girl,"

but when you grow up in the countryside,

you tend to be a bit more feral, I think.

I grew up on a farm, so I can hunt, I can fish.

I'm happy with dead animals and preparing them and...

Lou! Lou. Oh, here you are. Oh!

Oh, my God. There's a girl, a new girl called Alex.

So do you want to go out and meet her?

So can I come and have a look inside?

Can we just get a group discussion?

Yeah, fine. Thank you. Fair enough.

What do we think?

Thing is, is now we have eight mouths to feed

and the West Side have six.

Do we sort of say, "Can you go three days without the food, as we did?"

or something like that.

We went three full days without food, didn't we? That's fair.

And I do not want to go and send her

to go and live with them... No. ...fucking dickheads. No. No.

Come on in. I'm invited in? Come on.

Yes, come on right in. We've all voted to bring you in. We've all voted.

She says she can hunt. She says that she can fish.

She talks the talk, so that's hopefully

that she can walk the walk because...

...she needs to be bringing something to the table.

And at this stage, I'm not convinced.

So time will tell.

What do you guys like need right now that I can help?

Food. Firewood and food are priority. Yeah. Yeah? OK.

Well, I can help with that.

We really don't know her yet,

so, you know, it can be kumbaya right now,

but a few more days, she might rub people the wrong way,

we've got a good dynamic here.

But we'll see.

Do you reckon they've checked all these cars?

Definitely not.

North of the school and deep in East Side territory,

Matty and Dean are exploring the junkyard.

Got some piping in the back. Ooh.

We can cut in through here.

Oh, my God!

This is our lawnmower now.

Right, I want this wheel.

Got the wheel.

Take the gasoline as well.

Having found a wheel and fuel,

Matty now has everything he needs to run the lawnmower.

All that remains is to start the engine. As soon as it starts,

you're gonna have to let go of that rope.

OK. All right. Clear! Clear!

Aw. Aw, she wants to go.

She wants it!

It's important to get that lawnmower started

because it takes out so much of our physical labour

to carry firewood around.

Not yet. Clear! LAWNMOWER SPUTTERS

Oh. Aw. Aw.

I'm going to go hunting cos I'd like to surprise them all

with maybe something

so we can eat this evening.

Alex, are you going somewhere?

No, just outside for a wee. Oh.

In the crisp weather.

I'm gonna sneak off with the rifle.

Fingers crossed that I end up finding something

and, you know, bringing home the bacon.

I'm pretty sure I got him.

There he is.

So I shot the squirrel, but now he's sitting on a branch.

It is annoying...

...cos he's right there.

And I just wish he'd fall off the branch.

Having taken the gun without permission,

Alex has now been missing for two hours

with no explanation to the East Side group.

Well, if she's going hunting, why didn't she say she was going hunting and not for a wee?

We don't do shit behind each other's backs.

So Alex has technically stole the rifle

and didn't tell us that she was going out hunting.

She's lied to us.

This pissed all of us off.

But we'll have to work it out.

We'll have a chat.

Girl, where have you been?

Sorry, I tried to shoot something for a surprise.

OK. But I found firewood.

We're all freaking out, like, "She didn't tell us."

I... We thought you'd ran off to the other team.

I wouldn't do that.

"She's gonna double agent for us."

We thought you ran away. I wouldn't do that!

Give me that so I've got something to show.

Aw. Do you want me to come with you? Yeah, for moral support.

Hi, everyone.

I'm sorry I didn't tell you where I was going.

I wanted to surprise you with some meat.

The problem is, if you say you're going for a wee

and then you're gone for nearly two hours,

it's pretty obvious that you haven't gone for a wee.

Don't piss down my back and tell me it's raining, sunshine.

You've just come here for one day

and you've lied to us straight away.

It's fucking stupid!

The way that we roll as a group...

Yeah. ..is that we like the communication.

Yeah. Like, you're new here, we don't know if we can trust you like that.

And we were thinking, "Maybe she's gone to the other group."

We're thinking the worst.

They were not happy with me.

I'm not someone who deals with conflict well.

Are you all right, love? Yeah, I'm fine.

No, it'll be fine.

Just don't like talking about it or I start crying.

I know...

You cry?

Really?

Anything like that...

Really? You're a big softie.

You're a big softie.

Aw, don't make me cry more.

I'm emotional right now.

My son passed away on April 29, in 2023.

He'd turned seven two months beforehand.

He had leukaemia.

He bettered it, he was cancer-free.

They gave him this drug that's a horrible drug...

...and within two weeks, he was downhill.

And then the third week, he was gone.

Thank you. That's nice.

After he passed,

to be honest, the glass was empty.

I was just... yeah, I was in a bad way.

But I've slowly just got better and better.

And Henry was adamant that he was going to be a farmer,

so I actually bought the farm for him.

You know, it's never going to bring him back,

but if I can do something in his honour,

if something comes of it, all the better.

OK. That's clear. Ready?

- Clear! - Clear. LAWNMOWER STARTS

Whoo! Yes! Whoo! Whoo! Whoo!

Fucking let's go! Oh, my God!

Whoo! Whoo!

That is so fucking epic!

Look at that!

Whoo! Aw! Hey!

Woo-hoo!

Whoo!

After a lot of attempts to get that lawnmower pull-started,

once we heard it roar to life,

that was the best feeling.

Yeah! That was a huge thing for me.

It's probably my favourite day by far.

Whoo!

Oh, proud of Matty.

What a man.

We are the winners now.

Aw!

I mean, of the three things that we need to survive,

water, wood, food,

this does two out of three of them

and takes all the hard work out of it.

So it's pretty substantial.

Oh, fuck!

Hey, mate!

We thought we'd go swing our dicks over in the other camp

and drive the lawnmower up there...

...just to rub it into them.

Whoo!

What was that shouting?

Aw, they've got a little petrol motor.

No way! The bastards!

Whoa!

Whoo!

They've got a vehicle that they can drive.

Mm. They are just always a step ahead.

They are. They're thriving, we're surviving.

Look at them having so much fun.

And I've got to use my stupid legs to walk everywhere.

Seething with jealousy.

I want a lawnmower.

Aw. At least I've got a bigger willy.

Well, I hope so, anyway.

Sorry.

La-la-la-la-la-la-la-la-la-la-la!

Surely this has got some good shit.

Come on, the farmers of Riverside.

With the daily task of collecting wood now far easier

thanks to their new lawnmower...

Nothing, empty.

...West Siders Freddie and Matty

search further afield on farmland,

hoping to replenish much-needed food supplies.

Is that a goat?

Is it alive? GOAT BLEATS

Da-da-da-da-da-da-da.

Hell, yeah, brother. We're gonna be heroes.

We're winning.

We're killing it.

We found two goats.

What? THEY LAUGH

Getting the mower started,

we can transport firewood effortlessly.

Our team came together in the past two days

of just experiencing these amazing victories.

There's a Christmas tree.

Oh, my God! Ah!

Oh! Aw.

"Don't touch our..."

"Goats! If you take, you die."

CELIA LAUGHS That's good, though.

The sign will protect them.

The goats could sustain us for a very long time.

We're a phenomenal team.

We're literally in the apocalypse, and we're just smashing it.

And we can only get better.

Can only get better.

Put the sign in front of the two doors,

so they know that they're our goats.

Don't touch me goats!

If they do touch them goats, it's fucking game on.

Yeah, bro.

Good job, guys.

With supplies topped up,

the West Side plan a festive celebration.

Today is like a massive day.

Everything is happening today.

We've got our Christmas tree put up...

That's cute as fuck.

...then tonight we're having chicken.

And why do you think I'm frantically washing up

the utensils, the plates, the pan.

We're so grateful.

Honestly, like, I'm so looking forward to this evening's dinner.

DEAN LAUGHS

I don't know how to pick a chicken up. DEAN CALLS AND LAUGHS

Get Ioan.

Don't be upset. Come on. Come here.

You're all right, you're right.

Yeah, it's all about respecting the animal

and making sure we use every part of that animal.

Zero waste.

And that's our way of saying thank you.

CHICKEN CLUCKS

CHICKEN CLUCKS STOP

It's a milestone for us as a group.

It shows our first step

to being self-sustainable,

which is turning the living into the dead and eating their meat.

Yeah, I've never killed a chicken before,

but pheasants a lot back at home.

Grandparents used to...

...present me with pheasants to deal with.

I'd have to pluck them and gut them, etc, etc.

I'm looking forward to using my teeth.

I haven't used my teeth since I got here.

CELIA LAUGHS

Ta-da.

Who wants some pig trotters?

Yes, please.

Over on the East Side,

the group are eating the last of their preserved food.

I'm gonna try it, and then if I don't like it... Come try some piggy trotters.

I'm not gonna not try it. I'm just gonna eat it.

Oh, my God.

I mean, I eat most things, but a pickled pig's trotter

is not necessarily my bag.

Alex, we haven't done you any...

What? ..because we've only got the food.

We haven't got enough food for you, basically.

We haven't even got enough food for us.

Fine. Thank you.

Someone had to say it, didn't they?

You know, she hasn't brought any food to us or anything,

so she needs to earn her stripes, I guess, first.

Did you say there was a bit of beetroot in there as well?

Beetroot and turnip. That actually sounds quite nice.

It's fucking not.

It feels like I'm eating, like, someone's insides.

It's all red and jibbly.

It was more bone than it was anything else.

As long as I live,

I could do without ever having tasting pig's feet,

ever!

Scott, watching you suck on that knuckle

makes me want to vomit.

Aw, that's vile!

That's fucking vile.

What does that look like? SCOTT LAUGHS

It's all right, we get it. Stop it!

Get your head out of the gutter. SCOTT LAUGHS

Aw, right. Thank you, Chef.

Not a problem. Wowee.

Meanwhile, after their recent successes,

the West Siders are celebrating

with the whisky Ioan found earlier.

Are you having a... No, thank you. That's very kind. Not tonight.

What do you mean, "Not tonight?"

It's Apocalypmas,

there isn't a choice in the matter.

Apocalypmas. Apocalypmas.

Apocalypmas. Cheers! Apocalypmas. Cheers!

I haven't got any of you a present.

Dig in. That's phenomenal. Aw.

I cannot explain how excited I am

to taste this chicken.

Oh, my God. Aw! Dean, you've done it again!

This is nice. Since Brooke's left,

there's been no conflict. None.

One, two, three. Two, three.

I'm tired of winning. Aha!

Everything is just falling into our laps at this point. Oh! A grater!

Are there any jokes in there?

Hang on. Oh, I got one.

"Brooke is coming back."

Yeah!

Oh, Lord!

♪ Girls on a mission. ♪

Get two in there, two in here? Yeah. Yeah, me and Lou.

Eager to prove her worth,

newcomer Alex leads an expedition

to search for vital supplies.

KYRA SCREAMS Oh, my God! A mouse just came out!

Oh, my God. Oh my God. Oh, my God. Oh, my God. Oh, my God,

Oh, my God. Oh, my God. Oh, my God. Oh, my God. Oh, my God.

Have you checked these buildings?

Yeah. Yeah, we've done them. Me, Scott and Stevie did.

Down all down here. We've done down there.

We've done the bus station.

We've done the underground station.

I mean, we haven't been down there.

Going near to where the other group are.

Loot their area.

Having explored much of their immediate surroundings...

Better come this way.

Hey. ..the group push deeper into West Side territory

in the hope of finding undiscovered resources.

You think the Westers have been in here?

They've clearly walked here before.

They took the road, too. Look! Stop, stop, stop, stop,

stop, stop, stop, stop, stop, stop, stop, stop, stop, stop. Oh, my God. Stop, stop, stop.

Oh, my God. There's two!

Goats.

"Don't touch car gates

"unless you want a war." "Don't go to our gates

"unless you want a war." Fuck off!

Aw, the baby! Aw, they're so lovely!

So what are we going to do about this then?

Because they have clearly marked they're theirs.

Yeah, but they can't take livestock.

Let's take them home to ours.

They can then come within a negotiation to get them back.

Like we had to do with the chickens. Yep.

Eye for an eye. Yep.

Celia! Ready?

Yeah. I got here. I brought you this.

OK.

Surely we should get some reward

from feeding these freaking goats every day.

Kelly and Celia are walking half a kilometre

to reach the farm to feed their goats,

unaware that the East Side are attempting to steal them.

How do we catch goats?

I can catch a goat. Shh!

Got him.

The barn is a bit of a walk, isn't it?

Everything is ten times harder without food.

All right, let's go to the goats.

Yeah, you get the other one.

Go round behind her.

Those goats were a headache.

The little one, oh, my God,

he was screaming.

He was screaming. I was like, "Please, be quiet.

"We're gonna get caught."

So that's the barn, the red one, right?

Yeah.

That's it. Shut the door. Kyra, shut the door.

Shut the door. Shut the door. Shut the door!

Ooh! Fuck's sake! What did I just say?!

You bossed that, Alex.

Is the barn always left open?

Where is the sign we left? Where's our sign?

They're gone.

They've taken them.

That's war.

THEY IMITATE BLEATS

I grew up on a farm, so I fucking took them.

Shut up. Suck a fat one.

Come on. Come on, then.

We need to get back now,

and we all need to head to the other side.

Do you want this?

Yeah, I'll be taking this there,

because I'll smash up the whole place.

Shut the fuck up!

I can hear something in there.

You don't take fucking goats off a farmer.

Ah! Pissing me off!

I'm angry.

We're gonna smash the damn house and take our goats.

We need to fatten them up. War is coming.

The beacons have been lit.

Do you hear that?

If you are interested in taking part

in a potential new series of Apocalypse,

go to the Channel 4 website for more details.

Subtitles by Red Bee Media