All language subtitles for the wanderers 720p BluRay x264 YIFY

Richie, do you know
what true love means?

Do you know that it means standing up
by the person you love, thick and thin?

I won't come in... I promise,
I won't come in you.

- Richie, you just want one thing.
- No.

And when you got it,
it'll be all over for us.

- I promise, please!
- No, not yet.

What do you mean, 'not yet'?

Meaning a half hour? Five years?
You always say, 'not yet'.

Not yet.

A guy could die from this.
You want to be responsible for that?

- I'll do it with my hand.
- No! I could do it with my hand.

Richie, I got my
reputation to worry about.

You're a guy. Guys don't have to
worry about their reputations.

But Despie, I love you.

Oh, you love me?
Richie, I love you...

- I love you.
- I love you.

Do you love me?

- Despie!
- Oh, Richie!

Turkey?

- Turkey, is that you?
- Yeah, yeah, it's me, Joey.

- What happened, man?
- What are you talking about?

- What did you do to yourself now?
- What?

- Turkey, what's wrong with you?
- What are you talking about?

I shaved my head, okay?
Let me talk to those guys over there.

- Listen to me!
- No, listen to me, man!

- I got you in the Wanderers.
- You ain't got me in.

- I thought you was my friend.
- I am your friend.

You don't need those guys.
You're a Wanderer, man.

Now, but you can't be one for graduation.
I'm thinking about the future, Joey!

I'll be a Fordham Baldie. Wait and see.
The Baldies got it made.

Those guys look like a bunch of
Neanderthal retards. Look at them.

Are you kidding, man? Those are
the Fordham Baldies, Joey!

They shave their heads so their hair
won't get in their eyes when they fight.

Nobody fucks with the Baldies, man!

Those guys look like a
bunch of pricks with ears.

What did you just say?

- I ain't talking to you. Scram!
- Easy, Joey.

Hey, Peewee. Joey, this is Peewee.
She's head of the Baldies' Ladies Auxiliary.

That's Terror's woman, man.
She goes with Terror.

How you doing, Peewee?

- What did you just say?
- He didn't say nothing, Peewee.

I ain't talking to you!
What did you just say about pricks?

I said 'pricks with ears'!

Terror, this asshole said we look
like a bunch of pricks with ears.

He didn't say that, did you, Joey?

Oh, yeah, then what did he say?

I didn't say that. I didn't say you guys
look like a bunch of pricks with ears.

I said you look like a bunch
of ears without pricks!

- Hey, Terror, how you doing?
- Can I talk to you?

- Get him!
- When I get a hold of your ass...

Let me alone. I like you guys.

Get those little fuckers, guys!

Come on, Turkey, come on!

Let's go!

Help!

Let's get these motherfuckers!

Come on, Terror!

Wait till I catch you,
you skinny prick!

Come on, Terror!

Don't let 'em go!

Hey, you! Get back, you creep!

- Oh, shit!
- What's wrong?

What's wrong?

I gotta go.

- What?
- I gotta go.

- You what?
- Sounds like a Wanderer's in trouble.

- A what?
- I gotta go.

I'm sorry.

Richie, be careful, now!

Hey, Buddy! Somebody's in trouble!

- We have to stomp some ass.
- It's Joey and Turkey.

Joey, don't worry. We'll pummel
whoever's following you!

- The Baldies!
- Baldies?

- Shit!
- Let's get out of here!

Where we're going?

Shit!

Joey, what did we do?

Nothing! They just
started chasing me.

Come on, asshole!

Easy, easy, man.
It's me, Turkey, man.

This little guy don't mean no harm.
He's just a fucking idiot.

Leave the kid alone.

- Hey, tough guy.
- You say something, mother?

Hey! You hear me? I'm talking to you.

Leave the kid alone.

You know who you're
talking to, asshole?

Beat it. Nobody fucks
with the Baldies.

Asshole!

Leave the kid alone.

Got you.

Come on, let's go.

Let's get the hell out of here!

Your ass is grass, motherfucker!

- Beat it, you scumbag!
- Joey, what's wrong with you?

You'd better watch your mouth, kid.

Say nothing, Joey.

They shaved your head, Turkey?

Yeah, they shaved his head.

- Oh, Jesus.
- Goddammit,

I didn't think I'd see the day when
Terror backed down to anybody like that.

Did you see how chickenshit he was?

He wasn't chickenshit, Joey.
Terror ain't chickenshit of nobody.

He's just waiting for the right time.

Are you kidding? Did you see
what this guy did here?

- Where'd he go?
- Hey, come back here, man!

Hey, come back!

Where'd that guy go?

Strong...

I'm strong...

Leave the kid alone.

Jiu-Jitsu!

Come on, ya!

It's you.

I've been looking all over
for you, man. Where did you go?

I want to thank you.
What you did back there was great.

Forget about it.

You shouldn't have wised
off to those guys.

But I don't like to see big guys pick
on little guys. Know what I mean?

Hey, I can take care
of myself, all right?

Sure you can.

What are you doing here
waiting for my elevator?

- I'm waiting to go home.
- You live here?

- Yeah.
- This building?

Hey, what floor?

- Four.
- I live on four.

You're the new people, right?
My mom told me that.

How do you like that?
We're neighbors. I'm Joey.

- Perry.
- Perry.

Hey, where is it!

Where is it, you bastards
on the fifth floor!

I know what you're doing
up there, you assholes!

Excuse me, ma'am.

Hey, I heard about your old man,
how he died. It's too bad.

Anyway, the Wanderers are the
guys to get in with around here.

We've got a great football team,
great athletes, lots of girls.

Maybe you can join up,
I'll show you around, is that okay?

Okay, thanks.

Okay. You got to get into a gang.

I'm telling, it's just ain't
safe unless you into...

Hey, this is my father,
Emilio, and this is

I told you not to be
talking in the hallway!

- Mom, tell him he shall stop hit me!
- Don't talk like that to your old Lady!

- Perry? Darling, is that you?
- Yeah, it's me, Ma.

Would you mind running down to the
store and getting me something?

Don't worry, sweetie.
They won't ask you for ID. Okay?

Under sunny skies, WNCA,
New York City. Good morning.

Okay, you've got to lock
your doors around here.

Great car, man, great car.
Come on, we're late.

You get to drive your mother's
car to school every day?

She don't drive it so much.
She's got high blood pressure.

Too bad.

- Are you 18?
- Yeah, I'm... 19.

I got held back, you know?

Yeah, yeah, sure. I know.

Joey!

Hey, how's it hanging, guys?

You were really cool
yesterday, man. John Wayne!

Hey, Joey, what's his name??
What's your name?

- Leave him alone.
- Don't sweat it, Joey.

I just wanna meet the guy, man.

Come on, let's go.

Joey!

Get off my ass!

We got all kinds of gangs here.
See these guys here?

Those are the Executioners.

Over here on the left are
the Ferros, they're Jewish.

On the right, in green, the Irish.

- You're Italian, right?
- Yeah.

Then you got to get into an
Italian gang, like the Wanderers.

Hey, Turkey,
where's the dollar you owe me?

How you doing? Good to see you.

Then you got your nigger gangs.

You got your Cavaliers,
your Pips and your Mau Maus.

D.B. Stands for Del Bombers,
the toughest nigger gang around.

Hey, Clinton Stitch. How you doing?

Good to see you. He's the DB warm up.

- What's this?
- Hey, Teddy Wong!

The Wongs. 27 guys, all with the last
name Wong, who all know Jiu Jitsu.

Could kill you with one judo chop.

Hey, do you got gangs like
this where you come from?

No, we don't got this stuff in Trenton,
fucking New Jersey, you know?

Listen, don't worry about anything.

You hang out with the Wanderers,
and we'll take care of you.

Thanks.

Richie, where are you?

Richie, we got him.

Richie Gennaro.

- Perry Luigardi.
- How you doing?

I wanna thank you for helping us out.
Anytime you need anything, let me know.

Richie.

Richie, I got your homework.

I's a nice job. You even
goofed up my handwriting.

Thanks a lot, you're my main man.

Okay, Richie, man.

Turkey, take your hat off and get your feet
off the desk. It smells bad enough in here.

Very funny, Mr. Sharp.

I said, take your hat off!

- Come on, take it off!
- Come on, take the shit off.

What's the matter? You guys
never seen a Baldie before?

Mr. Sharp, did you see
what the skinny just did?

Shut up, stupid!

Hey, are you gonna make me,
motherfucker? Come on, let's go!

All right, settle down.

You've both have detention.

Aw, Mr. Sharp, man. Damn!

Mr. Sharp, them white boys here,
they's getting obstreperous.

- Obstreperous!
- Who do you call obstreperous?

Watch your mouth!

Anybody know what week this is?

- It's Brotherhood Week.
- Very good, Stitch.

Now, who wrote this?

You did.

A. Lincoln.

Race, creed, color.

Now, I wanna see how many
different races, creeds

and colors we have just
here in this classroom.

All Jewish people, stand up.

Okay.

All the Italians.

All right! Okay. Settle down.

All Colored.

What's the matter, Stitch?
Don't we have a group to suit you?

Oh, no, I'm an Eskimo.

Where can I get some Eskimo pie?

Okay.

Colored. Italian.

Or is it Colored and Eye-talian?

Is that the way your old
man talks? The Colored.

How about you guys?
What do you say after school?

Eye-talian?

Let's talk some straight talk.
Let's call a spade a spade.

- Come on, what is this?
- You're on our side, Mr. Sharp.

Okay, let's talk straight.
Give me some names.

Come on.

Nigger.

- Greaseball.
- Yeah! That's right.

Jungle bunny.

Swamp Guinea.

Handkerchief head.

Mountain wop.

- Bogey.
- Ginny.

- Coon!
- Dago.

- Watch you mouth, boo-boo.
- Spear-chucker!

Motherfucker, I'm gonna
chuck a spear up your ass!

Hold it! Hold it!
I can't write that fast.

Okay, is that it? That's all?

We ran out of names
pretty fast, didn't we?

Okay, what did we learn here today?

Mr. Sharp, the white boys
forgot a couple of names.

They forgot spades, spooks and jigs.

- Yeah, jig is good.
- Put that on the board.

How did you guys forget those names?

There must have been a
mental lapse, Mr. Sharp.

I think it's because they are a bunch of
dumb-ass, grease ball, Guinea, wop...

You fucking black bastard!

Fuck you, dago motherfucker!

- Jigaboo!
- Your mama!

- You ain't got one.
- Fuck you!

- What'd you say?
- Fuck you!

Hold it! Hold it!

Hold on back! Come on!

Will you sit down.

Hold it! I said, hold it!
Hey, you, hold!

We'll meet you at French
Charlies Field, okay? Saturday.

You got it. Saturday at noon.

No guns and no knives, alright?

Listen, I want everybody after school.
You got it? Everybody!

Sit down!

Don't worry, man!

Fuckin' hang that little bastard.

Because that's the only way you're
going to learn about brotherhood!

Hold it! Hold it!
What's the matter with you guys?

Haven't you heard about sticks
and stones will break my bones

but names will never hurt me?

Sit down!

Come on, motherfucker!
All you motherfuckers!

Get down there!

What's the matter with you animals?

- Come on, sit down!
- Mr. Sharp!

Any homework?

We don't want to get into this.

I know the neighborhood's changed,
but are you guys chickenshit?

Hey, for one thing,
you guys started it.

- We didn't start it, asshole.
- We heard you did.

You heard wrong. What else?

We're not a weird Italian.

I know you ain't Italian.

So, come on, what do you say?

- So, we say good luck to you.
- Yeah, good luck, faggots.

Chickenshit, motherfuckin', pussy...

Come back here.

Well, Richie,
no nigger will face this.

What are you doing with that?
We don't need those, man. Put it away.

You kidding me, man?
Those guys will show up with pieces.

Don't trust them.
You got to go for them first.

Man, he got a point, Richie.

Hey, listen, me and Clinton agreed.

No guns or knives.

You gonna trust that nigger?
You don't know where you're living.

You talking last year. We ain't
going with you without these.

Then you ain't going with us.

Nice knowing you guys.

Let's beat it.

Have fun.

- Motherfucking pussies.
- I don't know, man.

- Come on, let's go.
- Come on.

Hey, look, Richie,
I call my friends in the Baldies.

- Knock it off!
- Hands off me, Joey!

- Come on, left.
- Those guys like me.

Call 'em, I think they'll come in with us.
With them in, it's all over.

Listen, I ain't calling
those guys. I got my pride.

Yes, sometimes all you got is pride.

Got to hold your head up high.

I seen this movie once where this
guy was being tortured by the Japs

but he wouldn't give
them any information.

Every time they tortured him he started
singing the Star-Spangled Banner.

Wow.

What happened?

- They killed him.
- Shut up, you're depressing me.

- What was that?
- None, man, you got the jitters.

- I'm going to take a whiz.
- I thought I heard something.

- You guys hear anything?
- No.

Baldies got guys, too.

It's the Wongs!

Hey, Teddy Wong. How you doing?

- I thought you was coming earlier.
- We did come earlier, man.

We waited until now to
make ourselves known.

Which is been hanging out
in the bushes out here?

- It's pretty spooky.
- We've been listening.

Listen, I called you Wongs
here tonight for a reason.

- We know your reason.
- Gonna join us?

No.

You're gonna join them?

Stay back! Don't fuck with the Wongs.

No, the Wongs never
joined with anybody.

Yet.

What do you mean by 'yet'?

We'll decide what's right
when the time comes.

The Wongs will wait and see.

- When what time comes?
- What do they mean?

- Where did they go?
- I don't know.

Get back here!

No, get the fuck out of here,
you Chink assholes.

- Are you nuts?
- No sweat, they can't hear me.

Don't fuck with the Wongs!

Shit.

Richie, listen to what I just heard.
It ain't just the Del Bombers, man.

They're bringing in the Pips,
the Cavaliers and the Mau Maus.

Shit, we've got a fucking
race war on our heads.

Who we gonna get?

Maybe we'll bring in some guys
The Golden Guineas or the Dusters.

But one thing: We got to stay cool.

Hey, did you notice those spades got
two million cousins all over the country?

We need help, and I'm calling
my friends in, the Baldies.

Are you nuts, man? Forget it.

Guess who.

Al Capone.

No, it's me.

What do you know.

- What are you doing, Richie?
- Nothing.

What's that list?
You're gonna rumble?

No, it's just some business.
Listen, I'll talk to you later, all right?

I thought we were gonna
buy some records.

Yeah, maybe a little later, all right?
I love you, baby.

Love you, too.

- Oh, Richie?
- Yeah?

My daddy wants to see you.

Yo, Peppy Dio, how you doing?

Listen, I heard Chubby
is looking for me.

Right over there.

Over here, Richie.

You wanted to see me, Mr. Galasso?

Yeah. Me and my brothers wanted
to see you because we heard you...

maybe got some trouble
with the Colored.

How did you hear about that?

How did we hear about that?

How do the Galasso brothers hear
about anything in this neighborhood?

The reason I'm asking is that
maybe you could use some help.

No, we can handle it.

Just remember, Richie,

in this day and age, in this
neighborhood, there's lots of ways...

to skin the cat.
You know what I mean?

Not exactly.

Think about it.

You know where to find us.

These guys wanted Joey to come
so he could heal old wounds.

I respect these guys. Give 'em
a good rumble, they're happy.

Hey, look what's coming.
Look what the cat dragged in.

Joey, my favorite Wanderer, man.

You know, Joey, if I had a
dog with a face like yours...

I'd shave its ass and
teach it to walk backwards.

Very funny, Terror. Very funny.

Hey, Terror, we've come to you because
we've got problems with the niggers.

You guys know Roger, don't you?

What do you mothers want?

We've got some personal
business here.

You guys go to
Tulley High, don't you?

- Yeah.
- Yeah, sure.

Maybe you know a cousin of mine.
Clinton Stitch?

- One of the Del Bombers.
- Yeah.

Sure, Clinton Stitch. I know him.
It's a good friend of mine.

- You know Clinton, don't you?
- Yeah, sure, we know Clinton.

- Everybody knows Clinton.
- You know,

I think we can talk
business better in the park.

- Is this a joke?
- Sure, it's a joke.

- Just like yours about pricks with ears.
- Take it easy, will you?

- Or was it ears without pricks?
- Where are we going?

Hey, Terror, I knew you
wasn't chickenshit.

Turkey, do me a favor, will you?

Sure, Terror, you know how
I feel about you guys.

Hold these.

Hey, we're thinking about making you
guys honorary members of the Baldies.

That's great, Peewee.

And we thought we might
start by shaving your heads.

Come on, not my hair, all right?

Too good for us?

Maybe we won't take your hair off.

We'll just take something else off.

- Drop your pants.
- Sure, Terror, whatever you want.

Not you, Turkey.
You're gonna help us. Hop over.

Why don't you guys
just shave our heads?

We got delicate feelings.

You guys seem to think
you're too good for us.

You guys are a bunch of fruits!

Now, there you go again,
hurting our feelings.

Tie their hands.

Turkey, I want you to tie one
end of the rope right there.

Jesus, Terror

Turkey, don't do it.

Turkey, it's just a little
test to get in to the Baldies.

You know, to see how
brave a guy can be.

I know these guys heard
of rock'n'roll...

but you guys ever
hear of rock'n'cock?

How about cock'n'roll, mothers?

Hey, Turkey, do a Boy Scout knot.

Turkey, don't do it, man.

Don't do it, Turkey,
you're a Wanderer.

Turkey, you fucking homo.

Don't get me mad, Joey.

Okay, Turkey, pick up
both of the rocks.

You guys got any last
words to say to your dicks?

Say, 'Bye-bye, dick,
nice knowing you.'

Turkey, throw the rocks over.

Sorry, guys.

Oh, shit. Looks like we
got to get shorter twine.

Don't you guys go away.

We'll be right back.

Come on, Turkey, I got a soft
spot in my heart for you.

What are we gonna do now?

Can't get anybody to help us, Richie.

They left us here to die of exposure.

Don't fuck with the Baldies!
This is just a warning.

I'm glad you've come
to us finally, Richie.

You've got a good sense of reality.

We're gonna help you with
your problem with the Colored.

How are you feeling today?

- The old bowling arm feeling hot?
- Sure, we're always hot.

'Sure, we're always hot.'

Wasn't so hot last week
against those Long Island guys.

Which reminds me, you see who's
bowling out there tonight?

No.

Take a look.

Shit.

It's those guys from Long Island.

That's right.

You know what they're
doing here tonight?

- I don't know.
- They've come here for a rematch.

Mr. Galasso, those guys are too good.
They killed us last week.

You know, Richie,

you need some confidence.

The other kid can wait here.

You guys are gonna win big tonight.

Are you kidding, Peppy Dio?
These guys are good enough to be pros.

My instinct is they is pros.
Chubby checked up on them.

They go around to the different lanes.
They hustle the house bowlers.

They hustle the hustlers.

- They are greedy boys.
- What's Chubby gonna do?

Chubby got a way of
creating miracles.

What'll it be?

What's this?

- Five big ones?
- We ain't got that much.

No? What do you got?

Twenty-five hundred.

- Twenty-five hundred.
- I guess, that'll have to do.

We'll leave the money there.

Whoa, whoa, whoa, pal.
We get to pick the alley, right?

Anything! Come on, you guys
gonna play? Let's cut the bullshit.

Wanna keep score, too? Go ahead.
I'm just a dumb ginny.

What do I know?

For all I know,
you guys could be pros.

What are you guys talking about?

Your guys are really good,
is what we're talking about.

Hey, wait a minute. What's happening?
Where's everybody going?

Just closing for a while,
for a little privacy.

Help!

- Where are you going?
- No, wait, please!

What are you doing?

You guy is so good, it wouldn't be
fair unless you bowled handicapped.

- Twenty pins.
- Twenty pins?

That's not what I was thinking about.

- Fifty pins!
- No good.

What I had in mind
was a real handicap.

I seen this in my favorite movie.

You ever seen 'The Hustler'?

Good enough for Paul Newman,
good enough for you.

Now, where was we?

Oh, yeah, you guys come
to us with a problem.

We'll take care of it.

But remember, we're sportsmen.

And we're interested in
making a little bet on you.

Nothing wrong with that, is there?

I understand you're playing the Coloreds
in North Bronx Football League soon.

I think it would be to our mutual
benefit if you won one for the Galassos.

- Don't you?
- Yeah.

You know, there's two
kinds of people.

Those with common interests

and assholes like those hustlers.

What I like about these
Colored sportsmen

is they got common interest.

Not all your Colored are assholes.

It's a shame to see kids
beating each other's brains out.

Especially when there's no
financial advantage. Right, Albert?

- Right.
- How are you?

How are you, man?

- How you doing?
- Okay, you?

We're gonna have a
little football game.

A little sporting event.

I'm glad these boys here
brought us into the picture.

It gives these kids a chance to settle
their differences in a beneficial manner.

What do you say we adjourn
to the bar for a little discussion?

It's cool.

What's all this?

I'm making a banner.

Our big game with the Del Bombers
is coming up. You should come, Dad.

- Both undefeated. Could be a good game.
- Look at me when you talk to me.

What kind of drawing you doing?

Why can't you do something normal?

You know, a mountain
lake, a tree, birds.

That's art.

Those aren't normal people
you draw. They're freaks.

- Can't you hear me?
- Emilio.

- Joey, time to eat.
- They're freaks.

Hey, good. I got to
drop a few pounds.

I got to get more pressed.
Come on, let's eat.

Look, guys, it's us against
the world, all right?

I mean, just the Wanderers.
We got to stick together.

Yeah. We got to stick
it to the Del Bombers.

Joey, I got a game for you.

See who can hit the softest.

- Yeah, sure.
- You can go first.

- That's pretty good. It's my turn now.
- Yeah, go ahead.

Jesus, what did you do that for?
I thought you said the softest.

Yeah, I did. You win.

Asshole!

I'm in love! Look at that.

I'd like to stick it to that.

- I'm in love.
- She carries bombs, man!

Hey, you know what, man?
Today's the perfect day...

for elbow-titting.

Yes, Perry, pull over.

- Watch it!
- Watch where you're going.

- Me? I was just...
- Don't people look where they're going?

Watch it in the future!

- You get any tit?
- She had nice ones.

She didn't know what
was happening. Who's next?

Hey, Perry, you go.

- Me? No.
- Come on.

- Come on, man, really?
- What are you, chicken?

Chicken?

It's just grab free feels,
right in the street.

Too late. Too late.

Quit bothering me!

Look, man,
don't be afraid, all right?

Watch this.

Here goes the elbow-titting
champion of the Bronx.

Shit.

Hey, Joey, get a good one.

Do it, Joey baby!

Hey, Joey, the girl in
the red is Buddy's mama.

Don't touch my mama, Joey.

You boys are pigs!

- You have no respect!
- I'm sorry.

Lady, I'm sorry!

- You boys are pigs!
- Yes, ma'am.

Jesus Christ, I never realized
how dangerous elbow-titting was.

Hey, you win a few,
and you lose a few.

- Gone by.
- Don't hit me.

- You look alright.
- Look at that!

Hey, Richie, your turn.

- No, come on, it's all over.
- Come on, chickenshit.

- What is this?
- Hey, come on, let's go.

- Come on!
- Give it a go!

Go on!

- Watch where you go.
- Did you get a good one?

What do you mean?

I bet you think that's funny.

What are you talking about?

Alright, I'm sorry I bumped into you.

You think I bump into every
girl out on the street?

No, not into every girl. Just the ones
you're trying to cop a free feel from.

Hey, I wasn't trying to do it...

Don't bullshit me. Aren't you a little
old to be doing stuff like this?

You know, where I come from,
they call it molesting.

Yeah? Where are you from?

- Come on. Scram, pal.
- What school do you go to?

- Look, whatever your name is...
- Richie. What's yours?

Nina. Look, I don't talk to every
guy who tries to elbow-tit me.

What do you got here?

Yeah, I know this book.
It's a great one.

The whole thing,
or just the dirty parts?

Hey, come on, Nina,
don't take me over the coals.

Can't you have a straight talk about
books with a molester like me?

- Sex fiend, hey, over here!
- Hey, Richie!

- Make out odds.
- I hear your mom calling you, Richie!

Your friends want you back.

- You tell them everything?
- Are you kidding?

Just the dirty parts.

Listen, I think we should see
each other again sometime.

I gotta go, I've had hard day.

Hey, I want you to meet a friend.

Shut up for while.

- Joey, meet Nina.
- Hi, Nina.

You wouldn't know it to look at him,
but he's a great artist.

I think you two could hit it off.

- I've got to get going.
- Give us your number, okay?

I'm not giving you my number.
Hey, do you mind?

- Off the car, big fella.
- Joey, give her your number.

Maybe she'd like to go
and party with you.

- What? My number?
- Yeah, KO50564.

KO50564.

That's my number,
KO50564. You got that?

- Think she'll call?
- Sure she will.

- Richie, you're a true Wanderer.
- I hate to see one like that get away.

Let's go!

Come on, let's go. Come on.

We'll get them for you, Joey.

- Let's get her, man.
- Don't let her get away.

- She was nice, uh?
- She was something else.

Yeah she is.

Richie, now I think I know
what you mean by true love.

There she goes. Don't lose her.

She's sweet.

Come on, go. Go! We gotta get her.

Perry can sing.

Where the hell are we, man?

Is that her ahead of us, there?
Thought it was, but it ain't.

- Oh, man.
- Perry, where are you taking us?

I don't know my way around here.
I thought you were gonna tell me.

We got to get out and home, Perry.
I got to go to work.

- I got a date!
- My old man is going to kill me.

- Come on, let's go home.
- Just fucking relax.

- What is that?
- I don't know.

Is that still the Bronx?

We'll find our way out of here.

Let's ask that lady up there.

- Jesus Ch...
- Forget about it.

Jesus Christ.

- Who are these guys?
- Jesus!

Look out, it's another one!

- Watch it, will you?
- Look out!

Shit.

I think I know where we are.

- The Ducky Boys live here.
- He blocks my ride.

Holy shit, those are Ducky Boys.

Let's get the hell out of here!

Get the fuck out of here!

You little prick!

- Perry, get back here!
- What's the matter? You can't talk?

- Perry, no!
- Perry!

- Perry!
- Perry, get in the car!

Leave him alone, you fuckers!

Fucker!

Get in the car!

Get the fuck out of here!

Let's get away!

- We gotta get him to a hospital!
- Come on!

Come on!

Let's go!

We got to get him to a hospital!

Come on!

No counting on you for
the big game. Lousy luck.

Hey, I ain't telling
my ma about this.

The doctor said it ain't good
for the high blood pressure.

What are you gonna do?
Wear gloves? Stay here.

I go upstairs to see if
the coast is clear, okay?

Man, he'll kill me for
coming in this late.

Emilio? I'll see you tomorrow.

Bring me a little
something, will you?

Honey...

- Joey, what is it? What's the matter?
- Nothing.

Nothing. It's okay.

Yeah, I know.
No talking in the hallways.

You got a telephone.
Some dame's calling.

Sounds like a librarian.
You got books out?

Come on, get inside!

Perry, is that you, honey?

- Hello?
- Hi, is this Joey?

Yeah.

This is Nina, we met today.

Oh, yeah. Yeah, right.

I thought I'd call you up,
'cause you said something about a party.

- Who's gonna be there?
- All the guys.

Richie, the first guy you
met on the street today.

- Oh, yeah...
- He'll be there. Great guy.

- You liked him?
- Yeah.

- Joey, what are you so nervous about?
- I'm not nervous.

Jumping around and shit.

I got to take a piss.

She'll be here in a minute. Listen,
I want to tell you something.

You practically got it made
with this chick, you know?

- She called you up, right?
- Yeah, right.

She's coming to get us
for the party, right?

- Okay. What are you going to do?
- What do you mean?

You need a game plan.
How else are you gonna get laid?

Look, I can take care of myself.
Do you know so much about it?

Forget it. I'm just trying to
tell you how to get the job done.

- At least, do me a favor.
- What?

Keep your mouth shut.
You sound like my mother.

Hey, tell your mother she forgot
her shoes under my bed last night.

Your mother's got a mattress
on the back of the curbside...

Leave the hair alone, will you!

- Quit acting like a faggot!
- You wish.

- I know.
- You blow.

You wish. Shit, there she is.

- Hi, Nina.
- Hi, Joey.

- Get in the back, will you?
- And leave my main man up here alone?

Come on.

- Let's go, we're late already.
- Hi, Richie.

How you doing, baby?

What is this shit on the radio?
Ain't you got some decent music?

I'll change the station.

Yeah, all right. Some Rock'n'roll,
that's what I like.

Come on, let's go.

- Straight ahead?
- Yeah. Go left at the corner.

- Over here. Pull over there.
- Here?

- Behind this car. Right here.
- What is this car?

It's my parents'. They let me
borrow it when they go out of town.

They're out of town?

Shit, get down! It's Galasso.

Stay down, it's Galasso.
We don't want them to see us.

- What's a Galasso?
- It's Despie's parents.

What's going on?

Chubby doesn't want us to break training.
He's got a lot of cash riding on us.

That dress has got real class.

Shall we?

- You have money?
- I got a few dollars.

Goddamn, Richie!

New undies for your birthday, Joey.

Damn you, Richie!

Richie, can I get out of here?
I can't breath down here.

- Hold still, Joey.
- What's going on? Is the coast clear?

Is the coast clear? What's going on?

They're gone. Come on, they're gone!

I stuck!

Okay, let's Wampo!

Okay, Popeye!

Cleopatra.

My line turn.

Popeye.

Cleopatra.

Sweep the floor.

Hey, look who's here. Buddy B.!

- Let's roll!
- My line turn.

Hey, Buddy, how you doing, man?

- Jesus, what the hell is that?
- That's the woman I know.

- A woman?
- That's what it looked like, kid.

If your pants were any tighter, we'd be
able to see the veins in your balls.

Didn't know you were looking!

Joey!

I didn't know Purina
made sports jackets.

I didn't know Purina made bad breath.

Richie!

Come here!

Do you want to dance, Joey?

No, I'm not very good.
Maybe when a slow one comes on.

Thanks, man.

Thanks, guys.

I've got an urge tonight...

to maybe go out tonight and...

stomp some ass.

I just got to rumble.

Break some heads.
You know what I mean?

Yeah, I know what you mean.
I got an urge, too, man.

I know where there's a
Wanderers party tonight.

- The little guys.
- Yeah, bunch of pussies.

Let's go out, stomp some ass.

Maybe even get laid, too.

Sorry, Peewee. I didn't mean it.

- I just got an urge.
- Hey!

- You guys wanna fight?
- Yeah, we wanna fight.

You got to be kidding, pal.

- You gonna fight us?
- I ain't talking about me.

I'm talking about the
toughest guys in the world.

Man, who you talking about, man?
Nobody's tougher than the Baldies.

Why don't you guys come in here?

Come on.

I've always wondered what the
fuck you do in here. Jerk off?

Guys, I got a way you can
stomp all the ass you want...

and make the world safe for
democracy at the same time.

Here you are, gentlemen.

Pass those out.

Here you go.

Thanks, man.

Come on, girls. Get moving.

Buddy, come on, babe.

Joey, it's so noisy down here.

Do you suppose she'd mind
if we went upstairs to talk?

No. Hey, Rich!

We're gonna go upstairs to talk.

Just don't get any jizzy
marks on the Galassos' bed.

I'll make you eat it
off with a spoon.

Hey, good luck, Joey.

Richie, my daddy will kill me
if they make a mess upstairs.

They won't, don't worry about it.

You know, I think maybe we
should go upstairs, too.

I swear as a citizen
of the United States.

With this ceremony,
after signing this document,

you'll become Marines...

Terror, don't do it!

- Of the U.S. Marine Corps.
- Marines!

I swear that I have never been

a member of the Communist party.

At least you guys don't
need no haircuts.

Terror, you know what you've just done?
You've just joined the fucking Marines.

You stupid baboon!

You know what I think we just done?

What?

I think we just joined
the fucking Marines.

Hey, man, I hope you know
what we just done, is just a joke.

- Sorry, boys.
- What do you mean, 'sorry, boys'?

- I ain't even 21.
- You ain't got to be.

Come on, Mister, give them a break!

Them's the rules.

My mother will die without me.

- Should've thought of that before.
- What did you say about my mother?

Get out of here.

Don't worry. The Marines
will make men out of you.

You mean mothers might
enjoy a real war.

Remember, no jewelry, no bobby pins,
none of that kind of stuff.

Both socks count as one.

It's got to be authentic article
of clothing, all right? Let's play.

How did you guys meet, anyway?

We just sort of bumped
into each other.

What have you got?

- Pairs of deuces, Joey.
- Pairs of deuces, somewhat.

Too bad. I got a pair
of queens. I beat you.

Ah! Not so fast, I said pairs of deuces.
That means I got four of a kind.

Four twos?

Nobody gets four twos.

Let me see. A straight is when
you've got numbers in a row, right?

- Yeah.
- You got one?

No, but I got something very close.
Four, six, seven, eight and ten.

If only I got a five and a nine.

That's tough luck, baby.

Oh, that's too bad. Too bad.

I don't even know you guys very well.

Do you play this with
them often, Despie?

I never played this before.

How'd we get into this, anyway?

- Who's deal is it?
- It's your deal.

Ladies, ante up.

- Joey shed his shirt.
- Shut up, asshole.

Come on, let's ante up.
You gonna play or what?

Let's go.

You asshole.

What kind of polish is that, Despie?

Glitter.

- Litter?
- Glitter!

How do you know when you're flushed?
When you're all red?

It's got to be all the same suit,
like all head's or all diamonds.

Oh, yeah, I knew that.

I've got a real good hand.
Let me see...

Give me four cards.

Four cards? Sure.

Me too. Give me two.

You can't get any cards
without putting something up.

- Yeah. You still in?
- Come on, let's go.

I better pass then.

You can't get anything back by passing.
You have to win it back.

How come we never win?

Who can say? Confidence,
luck of the draw.

The wheel of fate
just keeps spinning.

All right, but don't look.

Richie?

Richie!

No fair, you guys are looking.

- Are you in, Despie?
- I'm out.

What do you got, Joey?
Joey, what do you got?

- I fold.
- What do you got, Nina?

Pretty good. Look.

Not good enough.

No, not good enough.
Full house, beats again.

Hey, wait a minute,
something fishy's going on here.

In a couple minutes,
we're gonna be naked, then what?

- You dealing.
- My deal?

- Then we play one more hand.
- My deal?

For what?

For what?

Then we get to do
whatever we want to.

Okay, that's it!

Sex fiends are at it again.
We got to get back to the party!

- What, what what?
- Just shut your mouth!

We've got to get back to the party.

We're at the party.
We're just having some fun.

- We don't have to stop playing, Despie.
- We've just been lucky.

- You'll win this next one.
- A little innocent game.

- I just got a feeling.
- One more hand.

There's nothing going on
downstairs, anyway. Come on.

Come on, stay, will you?
We'll have some fun here.

- Go and make sure she Go!
- Me?

- This was your fault!
- All right, all right.

Despie!

Man...

Man.

Come on, Terror, get in the car.

Come on. How about it, baby?

Put me down, Terror. You're drunk.

You know it's not good
when you're drunk.

- Come on, man.
- Come on, let's go!

Terror, get in the car, man.

Come with us, baby.

Come on, Terror, let's go.

Don't go.

Don't go.

All right. Let's stomp some ass!

Let's go someplace quiet to talk.

My car.

That's my daddy's cup!

Stupid son of a bitch!
How am I gonna get home?

Richie?

Richie?

Richie!

I can't forget about you since
the first time I saw you.

Come on, let's go inside!

We'll go inside and get
some women. Nookie, right?

You go inside, Turkey.
Bring it back out here.

Yeah, man, right.
Nookie to go, right?

Excuse me, may I take your orders?

Everything on it, I like it rare.

On the double, Private.

Yeah, man, right. I got you.

Hey, man, I'll be right back.

Did you see Richie?

Richie!

Richie, I was looking
all over for you.

Come on, sweetheart!
Come on, baby, let's go!

- Hey.
- Hey, what?

What are you looking at?
You're looking at a Baldie now, faggots!

Okay, scumbag, come on,
look out the window.

Terror's out there!

Shit!

Bad time, motherfucker.
Terror's gonna settle your ass.

Get out!

You're fucking dead, man!

You're fucking dead, man!

- Fuck off!
- Let go of me, man!

Terror! Roger,
where the fuck are you guys?

You had seen the outside, asshole!
I wanna see you run, understand?

Perry!

- Get the fuck outta here!
- Perry!

Terror! Roger, hey wait up!

Where are you guys going?

Terror! Roger! Wait up!

Joey.

Joey, wait, man, listen.

Listen, Joey, come here.

Joey, listen to me, man.
Listen to me.

- It's not what I'm listen to.
- I had to have a talk with her.

I can't get her out of my mind.
I met her first.

For Christ's sake, Joey, you and me
I couldn't fight the thing no more.

Don't fucking touch me!

She's just another fucking broad.
She don't matter anyway.

No, she ain't, man. She's special.

You shitheel!
You lousy, rotten shitheel.

This is what I get for putting out.

I knew this would happen.

Terror!

Baldies!

Fuck!

Shit!

- Terror, where are you?
- Shut up, you assdick!

Roger, get down here,
you bald-headed nigger!

No, Roger, I'm just kidding, man.

Roger!

Terror!

Terror!

Fuck!

Terror!

Where are you?

Hey, kid.

I didn't know there was
anyone around here.

I got lost.

Come here.

I need someone to talk to.

It's cold out.

Where are you coming from?

So what?

You go to high school around here?

You go to high school?

It's okay.

Come on, we can go in the park.

I'm not trunk. I'm serious.
Come on, man.

Yeah.

Help!

Help me!

Help me! Please!

Help me!

Terror!

No!

Roger!

Terror!

I want to tell you guys something.

It wasn't that bad. Not as you think.

I'm gonna miss Turkey, man.

Here comes the bastard.

Hi, Richie, man.

Richie, I got your homework.

Hey, guys, what are you doing?

...the President's
limousine was put away.

Mr. Haggerty explained, too...

the dome was not off
as you can see here.

There's the President
and Mrs. Kennedy,

just minutes before he was shot.

This is not confirmed.

We have it on what would
normally be good authority...

that the President has died.

However, we repeat,
this is not confirmed.

At the hospital, admiral
George Burkley, U.S.-Navy...

went for the emergency...

Now, as you can see here,
Mrs. Kennedy steps into the car.

That's her waving.

That's the President waving.

Richie,

- you know what true love means?
- Yeah.

That it means standing up by the
person you love, thick and thin?

Do you?

- Hello, Father.
- Hello, Father.

Do you know what else
true love means?

True love for a woman means having
the baby of the man she loves.

And do you know what
true love in a man is?

True love in a man...

is wanting that woman who
loves him to have his baby.

- Don't you feel that's what true love is?
- Oh, yeah. Definitely.

Richie,

I really feel true love for you.

I'd like to know if you
feel true love for me.

Sure I do.

Sure you do what?

No, I really do.

You really do what?

I really feel true
love for you, Despie.

Because the parents
should be in love.

I mean, when I told my daddy
I thought I was pregnant,

- ...he told me he thought the parents...
- What?!

Richie, my daddy wants to see you..

Look, I ain't no hard guy.

I was your age once. I used to put
them away like there was no tomorrow,

but one thing I never did
it with nobody's daughter.

Not only did you do it with my daughter,
but you knocked her up, you dumb wop!

You ain't got nothing up here.
It's all down here.

All right. I ain't no hard guy. It takes
two to tango and all that bullshit.

She's been banging since junior high
and you're the first jerk to get caught.

- Daddy, how could you?
- You should've given her an ankle bracelet.

Stop the jerking off.

The thing is, you knocked her up.

And now you gotta pay the
price and do the right thing.

It's the sportsman's way.

Hey, what's this?

Now you're scared.

Get up!

To my new son-in-law.

You'll live in the basement.
We got wood paneling.

Gloria! Come on down!

Come on over here, popsie!

Hey, do you like clams?

I'll take us all to City Island for
some clams. I ain't no hard guy.

What does it say?

- Eighteen inches.
- Eighteen inches.

You know what it was in '40, '41?

Seventeen and a half.
The Greek was eighteen.

Did I tell you I seen
him the other day?

He's turned into a tub of lard.

Feel it. Eighteen inches,
right where it counts.

Who do you think the
judges would vote for now?

- I'll be right down! Yeah!
- Keep it down in there!

Why don't you go see
Joey play, Emilio?

I don't wanna get embarrassed.

I understand he's good. You won't
get embarrassed. Go on, Emilio.

Not today. I'm busy.

We're so great! We're first rate!

Shit. Looks like them
niggers ain't gonna show.

The chickenshits.

Always have been.

Hey, what's that?

Holy shit! It looks like
they ripped off a circus.

We gotta win, we gotta win,
we gotta really win!

Where's that boyfriend?

Okay!

You know why they call you
guys the Wanderers, man?

Because after this game,
you'll wonder what happened.

Come on, motherfucker!

Hey!

Play ball!

Come on, break it up. Break it up!

4-5-2.

All right!

Sixteen!

Thirty-nine!

Twenty-four!

Time! Time!

- Fucking protection!
- Stay in your pocket!

You got your hands in my pockets.
You guys block like a bunch of fruits.

Hey, screw you, man!
Don't talk like that.

I'll talk the way I want, understand?
I'm the quarterback, asshole!

- Then be the quarterback!
- Shut up, all of you guys!

Maybe some of you guys got
a right to hate my guts.

But I think if we had Joey at halfback and
me at quarterback, we'd have a chance.

That's the way it was meant to be.

I've been thinking a lot about it

and I just wanna say to Joey here,
I'm sorry. I want to apologize.

What do you say?

That's great, man, great.

All I wanna say is that whatever
I've done is in the past, all right?

All is forgotten. Okay?

What we gotta do now, is to win
this game for the Wanderers.

What do you say?
Wanderers forever, right, Joey?

Let's kill them!

- Ready?
- Set!

Strong right, full house.
Wanderers' special on one, ready?

Let's go, come on!

Going left, full house,
Despie special.

Tie game, mothers!

Throw the goddamn ball!

You got it, brother.

Okay, let's have the ball.

I ain't going over there.

If you want the ball,
brother, you go get it, okay?

Hey, Clinton,
you guys chickening out?

Hell, no. There's some short, runny-ass
sucker over there with a big blade.

- What?
- Yeah.

- I don't see nothing?
- Oh, you don't nothing?

Come on, let's go.

All right!

All right!

We look good and we look pride, but
you look like a cow's behind, all right!

They're here!

Look, they're here!

- What?
- A Ducky Boy!

Where?

I ain't fucking around, man.
I saw him. He was here.

Shit! Everyone's starting to
see things. What is this?

Can't we just play
some football? Let's go!

Shit.

Ducky Boys.

Shit! What are they doing here?

Where are they all coming from?

What are we gonna do?

Don't run. We'll fight them.

- Run?
- We'll stay.

Yeah, we're gotta stay. Nobody goes.

Shit! Behind us, too.

It's hundreds of them.

- Daddy!
- Come on!

I think my mother's calling me.

I'm thirsty, fellas.
I think I'm gonna get a Coke.

They killed Turkey.

Sons of bitches. Come on!

Ducky Boys. Ducky Boys.

Who are these guys? Friends of yours?

- Yeah, come on, you fuckers!
- Come on!

Joey!

- Joey!
- Come on!

Hey, come and play.

We beat them!

We beat them! We won!

Don't leave! We're still playing!

Come on! Come on, fucking Duckys!

Are you okay? We beat them!

Hey, we beat them, Dad!

I tell you, I just ain't going home.

I don't know what to do,
but I ain't going home.

It's my poor ma I feel sorry for.

Twenty years of walking on
eggshells living with that asshole.

- Where's your ma?
- I don't know.

She went out for a while.

It's okay, man, sleep over.
She don't mind.

- What's the matter?
- Nothing.

Take a swig of this.

She's got high blood pressure,
something like that?

No, man, nothing.

- Hey, come on.
- No, really.

It ain't exactly high blood pressure.

- It's...
- What is it?

It's...

It's an alcoholic kind of thing.

Last night, it got
real bad, you know?

Low.

She checked in to some
kind of hospital.

Jesus, Perry.

I'm sorry, man.

Oh, man, no,
there's nothing to be sorry for.

She's better off. It's okay,
it happened before.

Don't worry about,
she's gonna be fine.

- I'm taking off.
- What?

They want me to go back to
Trenton, fucking New Jersey.

Screw graduating. I've been thinking
about heading out to California anyway.

California?

That's it. Hey, yeah,
that's a great idea.

Hey, I'm coming with you.

No, no, no. I travel alone.

Besides, I ain't sure
I'm going to California.

Maybe I'll go to China.

Hey, I was just...

Perry?

What?

I'm scared.

Hey, what's wrong with that?

What do you mean?

Hey, Joey, do me a favor.

If we gonna travel together,
you gotta promise not to be an asshole.

Hey, we'll take off right after the
bachelor party for Richie, all right?

Yeah.

Yeah, yeah.

Gina! Gina!

- Who's Gina?
- My mum.

But who the hell is that?

It's my dad, Emilio.

Gina!

Hey, Gina...

Hey...

I thought you told your mother you
were going out bowling tonight?

You've been lying to her or what?

Don't come near me.

What are you talking about? I want to
know why you weren't home for dinner.

- Don't come near me.
- Leave the kid alone.

You talking to me, kid?

Ain't your father
teach you no manners?

- Leave the kid alone.
- Perry, he'll kill you, man.

That's the trouble with
you rotten kids today.

Your fathers are afraid to kick
some sense into your heads.

And your father must have
been some kind of piss ant...

There's no sense of humor.

Come on, what's all this about?

You dumb fuck!

Who do you think you dealing with?

Do you think I'm some
kind of faggot Ducky Boy?

Who do you think you dealing with?

You little fuck! Who do you
think you dealing with?

You shouldn't have done that!
He's your father. Don't forget that.

I think I killed the bastard.

Let's get out of here.

Let's get out of here!

- What are we going to do?
- Get to my car.

Richie Gennaro! Sex fiend!

What are you guys doing here?
You're going to get me fired.

What're you doing?

Tell me, did you sleep with her?

What else are you
going to do with her?

- Fix your hair. Come on, let's go.
- What's going on?

- Big trouble, man!
- Trouble? Where? With who?

- You gonna find out.
- You're in big trouble.

- Come on, big trouble.
- Okay, I'm coming.

- Comb your hair.
- I'll do it.

Man, what's going on, guys?

We all chipped in to get you
something for your bachelor party.

Here you go.

Are you serious?

Come on, open it.

This is something you
needed all along.

Richie, you deserve it.
You're my main man.

That's the least we could have done.

Come on, open it.

- Would you open the box?
- I open the box!

I open it, you asshole!

We can't stand here all night.

- Sometime today, I want to eat.
- There are more boxes in here!

What are you talking... What is it?

Open it.

I hate you, guys!

- Come on!
- I do my best already!

- Shit! What is it?
- One more time.

It's real nice.

Shit! Fuck you guys!

One lousy rubber. Thanks a lot,
you fucking assholes.

We got you a life-time supply.

- Talk to you later., okay?
- Come on. You just got here.

You have to stay, man.

Come on. We'll have a little food, drink
a little wine. We'll have a good time.

- We don't feel comfortable.
- With all these gold jackets, man.

- Don't worry about it, man.
- Okay, let's stay.

We'll have a good time. Come on.

- We'll hang for a little while.
- Have something to eat.

- All right.
- All right. That's great.

Let's see!

Are you ready? This is "La Femina"!

This is from the guys over there.

Hey, son-in-law.

I was talking with my brothers.

They agreed to bring you in.

It means you're going
to do all right.

This fits real nice.

You'll grow into it.

Once you're married to my daughter,
you'll never wash another dish in your life.

Where are you going?

Just getting some fresh air.
I'll be right back.

Hey, Nina!

Nina!

Nina, wait a minute. What's...

I'm sorry, ma'am. I thought
you were somebody else.

I'm sorry. Excuse me.

Hey, where are you guys going?

- We got to be on our way.
- On your way?

Yeah, we just came
by to wish you luck.

What're you talking about?

Joey, what's going on?

Hey, Peewee, get out of there.

What's the matter, Joey?
Leave me alone, will you?

Hey, Joey, what're you doing?

- Come on, Joey!
- Damn you!

You ain't so tough
without your Baldies.

Leave me alone!

Hey, man, you hurt me,
you big shithead.

Don't cry.

I'm sorry.

All that time I was
with the Baldies...

and not one of them
even drops me a card.

Hey.

I'll drop you a card, all right?

Hey, Joey. Come on, man, let's go.

Where are you going?

Hey, where do you guys
think you're going?

You can't go, man.

I gotta go.

But, if you ever need us,
just whistle loud. We'll be there.

Joey, you can't do it to me.
Fucking little guy.

Come here.

Just remember one thing.

Wanderers forever.

Don't take any wooden pussy.

Hey, come on back, will you, guys?

Come on with me. Everybody's inside.

Quit your fucking crying.

Thank you so much.
Thank you, I'm glad.

- Come back again.
- Thank you, sweetheart.

- Thank you so much.
- We'll come back and see you soon.

- Take care of yourself.
- Thank you so much.

- Is this the guy?
- This is the guy.

The man of the hour.

Ladies and gentlemen,
this young man is getting married

and I don't know what
advice we can give him.

Don't do it!

What's your favorite song, Richie?

It's all right, I ain't got one.

Well, I got one for you.

And I want you all, ladies and
gentlemen, to join in as I sing.

San Francisco, 2941 miles.

Do we got enough gas?

Hey, Joey, do me a favor.

If we're going to travel together,
you have to promise

not to be an asshole.
Yeah, yeah. I know, I know.

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