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1
00:00:17,692 --> 00:00:19,496
I am the Lexx
2
00:00:19,594 --> 00:00:23,799
The most powerful destructive
weapon in the two universes.
3
00:01:02,498 --> 00:01:05,700
Lexx 2.09 791
4
00:01:39,908 --> 00:01:41,510
If I only had a body,
5
00:01:41,610 --> 00:01:43,612
I'd be more than just a head.
6
00:01:43,712 --> 00:01:45,514
If I only had a body,
7
00:01:45,614 --> 00:01:47,716
I would slap her on the bed.
8
00:01:47,816 --> 00:01:49,284
If I only had a body,
9
00:01:49,384 --> 00:01:50,686
If I -
10
00:02:00,395 --> 00:02:01,897
If I only had a body,
11
00:02:01,997 --> 00:02:04,399
I would be Xev's hunky man.
12
00:02:04,499 --> 00:02:05,901
If I only had a body,
13
00:02:06,001 --> 00:02:08,503
I would get to pummel Stan.
14
00:02:08,603 --> 00:02:09,706
If I -
15
00:02:16,911 --> 00:02:18,514
Oh, I was just dreaming.
16
00:02:24,485 --> 00:02:26,187
Lyekka?
17
00:02:27,989 --> 00:02:29,692
Hello Stanley.
18
00:02:31,893 --> 00:02:34,195
It's wonderful to see you.
19
00:02:34,295 --> 00:02:36,499
I was just dreaming of you in that outfit.
20
00:02:38,099 --> 00:02:42,600
Hello robot. I have to eat - soon.
21
00:02:44,502 --> 00:02:47,219
Well, see that's, that's a problem.
22
00:02:47,706 --> 00:02:50,188
See, we're precisely in the middle of nowhere.
23
00:02:50,189 --> 00:02:52,670
There's no-one out there, there's no-one to eat.
24
00:02:52,914 --> 00:02:54,016
Except you -
25
00:02:54,116 --> 00:02:56,051
so please Lyekka,
26
00:02:56,052 --> 00:02:57,987
help yourself to security guard class appetiser -
27
00:02:58,387 --> 00:03:01,230
and stay away from Xev, meat fiend!
28
00:03:01,990 --> 00:03:04,042
You don't have to worry yet, Stanley.
29
00:03:04,043 --> 00:03:06,095
I heard a signal.
30
00:03:07,896 --> 00:03:10,400
That means there should be
something else to eat nearby.
31
00:03:10,451 --> 00:03:13,939
A signal? Why didn't you wake me?
32
00:03:14,002 --> 00:03:16,354
It was a distress signal.
33
00:03:16,355 --> 00:03:18,707
They only lead to trouble, so I always ignore them.
34
00:03:19,908 --> 00:03:22,310
Yeah, well - yeah.
35
00:03:33,288 --> 00:03:35,289
It is not a life bearing planet,,
36
00:03:35,290 --> 00:03:39,194
therefore the distress signal must be coming
from a life form that originated somewhere else.
37
00:03:39,995 --> 00:03:42,096
Like people who might have crashed there?
38
00:03:42,097 --> 00:03:43,897
Yes - for example.
39
00:03:43,898 --> 00:03:45,399
Any atmosphere?
40
00:03:45,400 --> 00:03:47,001
A very thin one.
41
00:03:47,002 --> 00:03:50,075
Xev would require a pressure suit.
Stanley would not.
42
00:03:50,105 --> 00:03:51,705
Why not?
43
00:03:51,706 --> 00:03:55,311
Because a pressure suit would allow you
to continue to breathing, which is a bad idea.
44
00:03:56,111 --> 00:03:58,612
A pressure suit would prevent the gas
dissolved in your blood
45
00:03:58,613 --> 00:04:00,616
from exploding in the thin atmosphere -
46
00:04:00,716 --> 00:04:03,984
something I've been looking very forward to.
A pressure suit...
47
00:04:03,985 --> 00:04:07,489
Anyway - I'm not going anywhere.
48
00:04:07,690 --> 00:04:10,190
What's the matter Stan - scared?
49
00:04:10,191 --> 00:04:13,295
No, smart. I'm staying on the Lexx.
50
00:04:14,896 --> 00:04:17,398
I have to go down to the planet now.
51
00:04:17,399 --> 00:04:19,170
I'm very hungry.
52
00:04:19,291 --> 00:04:25,107
So, we go down to the planet and rescue some
crashed people, and then you just - eat them?
53
00:04:26,107 --> 00:04:28,811
I will eat animals, if there are any.
54
00:04:29,611 --> 00:04:31,912
But the people if that's all there is?
55
00:04:31,913 --> 00:04:34,214
Yes.
56
00:04:34,215 --> 00:04:36,685
I would never eat Kai, because Kai is dead.
57
00:04:37,485 --> 00:04:40,389
You are my friends, so I prefer not to eat you,
58
00:04:41,189 --> 00:04:43,390
but if I stay here I will have to.
59
00:04:43,391 --> 00:04:44,491
What if I stop you?
60
00:04:44,492 --> 00:04:45,492
How?
61
00:04:45,493 --> 00:04:47,096
Kill you, perhaps.
62
00:04:53,602 --> 00:04:55,404
I'm not so easy to kill.
63
00:04:56,204 --> 00:04:59,108
Please - I need to go down to the planet now.
64
00:05:05,001 --> 00:05:07,917
But I like her - well, when she's not hungry anyway.
65
00:05:08,717 --> 00:05:11,387
I like you too Stanley.
66
00:05:11,587 --> 00:05:13,988
She eats people.
67
00:05:13,989 --> 00:05:15,789
Well, yeah, but -
68
00:05:15,790 --> 00:05:18,443
Lyekka is a predator. I
t is fundamental to her nature
69
00:05:18,444 --> 00:05:21,096
to consume other living life forms, like you.
70
00:05:22,097 --> 00:05:25,501
So you think we should leave her on the planet then?
71
00:05:26,301 --> 00:05:29,705
Being dead means not having an opinion.
72
00:05:30,505 --> 00:05:33,072
Well I think - I think we're stuck for now.
73
00:05:33,073 --> 00:05:35,640
Maybe I'll decide to leave her
74
00:05:35,641 --> 00:05:38,208
behind once we get down there.
75
00:05:39,014 --> 00:05:44,571
Ah Xev, don't be so foolish. I mean, there's
no need to go down - stay here, stay safe.
76
00:05:45,487 --> 00:05:47,489
Xev are you listening?
77
00:05:48,290 --> 00:05:49,392
Nope.
78
00:05:52,093 --> 00:05:54,597
No. No.
79
00:06:04,105 --> 00:06:07,009
We're close to the source
of the distress signal now.
80
00:06:13,214 --> 00:06:14,584
There it is.
81
00:06:15,984 --> 00:06:18,025
Stan - Xev.
82
00:06:19,350 --> 00:06:22,328
There's a crashed ship where that
distress signal is coming from.
83
00:06:22,329 --> 00:06:23,329
Be careful.
84
00:06:23,892 --> 00:06:26,193
Sure, we will.
85
00:06:26,194 --> 00:06:28,497
I've got a bad feeling.
86
00:06:33,401 --> 00:06:35,804
I've got a bad feeling.
87
00:06:50,785 --> 00:06:53,689
Stay close to me! I can't see a thing.
88
00:06:54,489 --> 00:06:56,890
I will.
89
00:06:56,891 --> 00:06:59,595
Lyekka! Let's stay close together.
90
00:07:01,796 --> 00:07:04,600
Lyekka! Lyekka?
91
00:07:53,315 --> 00:07:54,915
How can we open this door?
92
00:07:54,916 --> 00:07:57,186
I think from in there.
93
00:07:58,186 --> 00:08:01,818
Clearly this airlock is controlled
from behind that armoured glass..
94
00:08:02,082 --> 00:08:06,243
That is highly unusual. We should
return to the Lexx at once.
95
00:08:31,886 --> 00:08:33,991
Maybe we should check out
whatever's up there first.
96
00:09:03,285 --> 00:09:05,087
The air is breathable in here Xev.
97
00:09:05,887 --> 00:09:07,288
Are you sure?
98
00:09:07,289 --> 00:09:08,989
Yes.
99
00:09:08,990 --> 00:09:12,394
Some of the ship's systems
are obviously still operating.
100
00:09:14,796 --> 00:09:17,299
I don't know, this must be the bridge.
101
00:09:29,010 --> 00:09:31,213
These are human hearts.
102
00:09:31,913 --> 00:09:35,784
Yes. Their life support system
is still functional.
103
00:09:36,885 --> 00:09:40,689
The pilot, however, is not.
104
00:09:49,598 --> 00:09:52,401
His head has been ripped off.
105
00:09:55,103 --> 00:09:56,705
A robot.
106
00:09:59,207 --> 00:10:00,910
A cyborg.
107
00:10:02,510 --> 00:10:06,315
Machine from the lungs up.
Mostly human from there down.
108
00:10:08,503 --> 00:10:09,684
Goodbye, head.
109
00:10:11,587 --> 00:10:13,087
Are you OK?
110
00:10:13,288 --> 00:10:14,489
Fine.
111
00:10:15,490 --> 00:10:16,890
Was there a human crew?
112
00:10:16,891 --> 00:10:18,894
No sign of any.
113
00:10:24,599 --> 00:10:26,500
Must have been a hard landing...
114
00:10:26,501 --> 00:10:28,404
Yes - hard!
115
00:10:28,504 --> 00:10:29,705
790?
116
00:10:30,706 --> 00:10:32,508
What are you doing?
117
00:10:33,308 --> 00:10:36,412
Oh, just running a quick scan
of his thing - his systems!
118
00:10:36,812 --> 00:10:37,812
Hmm. And?
119
00:10:37,815 --> 00:10:39,513
He's completely dude - dead!
120
00:10:39,514 --> 00:10:42,984
Totally non functional. Never.
Useless. History.
121
00:10:42,985 --> 00:10:44,185
Expired. Scrap. Done.
122
00:10:44,186 --> 00:10:46,487
I could have sworn you were getting ideas.
123
00:10:46,488 --> 00:10:47,989
Pardon me?
124
00:10:47,990 --> 00:10:50,893
Oh - yes, well, of course
I noticed the missing head,
125
00:10:50,900 --> 00:10:53,794
but I determined immediately
that it is beyond repair,
126
00:10:53,795 --> 00:10:56,399
so I dismissed the dick - the idea
of making him work again then and there.
127
00:10:56,799 --> 00:11:03,127
What a shame. He's quite - a specimen.
128
00:11:05,407 --> 00:11:08,551
I should try to analyse the ship's
flight computer, don't you think?
129
00:11:08,610 --> 00:11:11,137
After all, we want to know why it crashed.
130
00:11:11,213 --> 00:11:12,613
You seem to.
131
00:11:12,614 --> 00:11:14,417
My interest is purely academic.
132
00:11:15,183 --> 00:11:18,535
This could take a little while -
quite a little while,
133
00:11:18,687 --> 00:11:21,818
in fact. I will have to learn
how to work his - this, system.
134
00:11:21,990 --> 00:11:22,792
Perhaps you -
135
00:11:22,794 --> 00:11:26,495
Kai and I - will explore the rest
of the ship, I guess.
136
00:11:26,795 --> 00:11:28,896
Excellent idea.
137
00:11:28,897 --> 00:11:32,401
I suggest that we begin with the rear section.
138
00:11:33,101 --> 00:11:35,403
Call us if anything big comes up.
139
00:11:35,404 --> 00:11:38,006
I will.
140
00:11:38,807 --> 00:11:40,207
Be careful Xev.
141
00:11:40,208 --> 00:11:42,810
I will.
142
00:11:43,411 --> 00:11:45,814
I won't be too long.
143
00:12:01,997 --> 00:12:04,750
OK, headless hunk of fantasy fulfilment.
144
00:12:04,751 --> 00:12:07,503
Time to meet your new master.
145
00:12:23,585 --> 00:12:26,290
I wonder why the two sections
of the ship are so separate?
146
00:12:31,192 --> 00:12:32,693
Talk to me.
147
00:12:32,694 --> 00:12:35,296
Talk to me!
148
00:12:42,504 --> 00:12:45,206
Yes!
149
00:12:50,912 --> 00:12:53,816
Oh Xev - it's going to be magical.
150
00:12:56,184 --> 00:12:58,087
It's going to be -
151
00:13:02,591 --> 00:13:05,694
Bad. Very, very bad.
152
00:13:08,496 --> 00:13:11,299
790, we're in front of the door
to the rear section of the ship,
153
00:13:11,399 --> 00:13:14,105
and we can't open it. Can you
activate it from the bridge?
154
00:13:23,111 --> 00:13:24,914
Thank you.
155
00:13:26,114 --> 00:13:28,183
Some kind of electronic barrier?
156
00:13:35,690 --> 00:13:38,193
It appears to be harmless.
157
00:13:40,195 --> 00:13:41,998
I wonder what it's purpose is?
158
00:13:44,199 --> 00:13:45,601
Shall we?
159
00:13:51,406 --> 00:13:53,009
It doesn't look like much.
160
00:13:57,412 --> 00:13:58,855
Let's make our way round.
161
00:14:02,183 --> 00:14:04,084
That's right. Come on body,
162
00:14:04,085 --> 00:14:05,088
come on!
163
00:14:08,290 --> 00:14:10,793
Lean over now. Pick me up, here we go.
164
00:14:13,295 --> 00:14:18,982
No, no, no! Come back here, you brawny servant
of my soon to be requited passion!
165
00:14:19,601 --> 00:14:22,605
Put me in my rightful place!
166
00:15:04,713 --> 00:15:07,216
This appears to be the entire cargo.
167
00:15:17,092 --> 00:15:19,194
Whatever's in there must be very valuable.
168
00:15:19,995 --> 00:15:22,398
Or very dangerous.
169
00:15:48,490 --> 00:15:49,991
Found anything?
170
00:15:50,992 --> 00:15:52,696
An ovoid object.
171
00:15:52,799 --> 00:15:55,395
Potentially an alien egg of some sort.
172
00:15:57,804 --> 00:15:59,804
Now, gently. Gently!
173
00:16:18,887 --> 00:16:20,689
Be careful.
174
00:16:26,895 --> 00:16:28,698
There's movement inside.
175
00:16:31,500 --> 00:16:32,603
Something alive.
176
00:17:10,505 --> 00:17:13,278
790, are you there? 790?
177
00:17:14,709 --> 00:17:18,956
790, can you hear me? Come in.
178
00:17:19,214 --> 00:17:21,317
I'm right heeeeeeeeeeeerre!
179
00:17:29,491 --> 00:17:31,694
Have you learned anything about
the nature of this ship?
180
00:17:32,494 --> 00:17:34,296
Not much.
181
00:17:35,297 --> 00:17:36,697
Keep searching.
182
00:17:36,698 --> 00:17:39,401
And see if you can turn on some
more lights in this section.
183
00:17:39,801 --> 00:17:42,304
I'll get right on it!
184
00:17:48,410 --> 00:17:51,814
Stan, this is Xev. We've found somebody alive.
There could be more
185
00:17:52,614 --> 00:17:54,214
Somebody,
186
00:17:54,215 --> 00:17:56,185
what kind of somebody?
187
00:17:57,786 --> 00:17:59,688
A female somebody.
188
00:18:00,488 --> 00:18:02,191
Female.
189
00:18:03,792 --> 00:18:05,694
Is she attractive?
190
00:18:06,494 --> 00:18:08,297
Is that all that matters to you?
191
00:18:09,097 --> 00:18:11,200
Yeah, pretty much.
192
00:18:12,000 --> 00:18:13,100
Bye, Stan.
193
00:18:13,101 --> 00:18:15,004
No, wait, wait!
194
00:18:32,587 --> 00:18:34,390
Who are you?
195
00:18:35,190 --> 00:18:37,993
I am Kai, last of the Brunnen G.
196
00:18:38,793 --> 00:18:40,796
Where are the jailers?
197
00:18:41,997 --> 00:18:45,000
If you mean the crew, there is no sign of anybody.
198
00:18:45,800 --> 00:18:47,901
The bridge was deserted.
199
00:18:47,902 --> 00:18:50,004
Not even a pilot?
200
00:18:50,005 --> 00:18:52,408
There is a cyborg pilot, strapped in a seat.
201
00:18:53,208 --> 00:18:56,612
However, he seems to have lost
his head when you landed.
202
00:18:57,412 --> 00:18:58,712
Landed?
203
00:18:58,713 --> 00:19:01,184
You've crashed, on an uninhabited planet.
204
00:19:02,785 --> 00:19:04,588
We heard your distress signal.
205
00:19:07,088 --> 00:19:08,489
Are you a prisoner?
206
00:19:08,490 --> 00:19:10,291
Yes.
207
00:19:10,292 --> 00:19:11,493
What was your crime?
208
00:19:11,994 --> 00:19:16,849
Nothing - except for being
in the wrong place at the wrong time.
209
00:19:17,599 --> 00:19:19,702
I'm innocent.
210
00:19:20,502 --> 00:19:23,205
What was your crime?
211
00:19:24,205 --> 00:19:28,911
Failing my wifely duties, and
humiliating my husband in the temple.
212
00:19:30,712 --> 00:19:33,215
I wasn't innocent.
213
00:19:36,585 --> 00:19:39,188
So, how did you end up here?
214
00:19:40,488 --> 00:19:44,465
I was going to meet my husband,
at the outer colonies.
215
00:19:46,695 --> 00:19:49,999
We picked up some metal traders,
at the outer rim.
216
00:19:50,799 --> 00:19:53,300
They started killing us,
217
00:19:53,301 --> 00:19:55,305
just murdering everyone.
218
00:19:55,906 --> 00:20:00,409
Laughing, rubbing blood all over -
219
00:20:02,310 --> 00:20:04,313
Where were they taking you?
220
00:20:05,514 --> 00:20:09,985
I don't know. They might be
slave traders, I don't know!
221
00:20:10,585 --> 00:20:13,289
I wish they'd just killed me.
222
00:20:19,094 --> 00:20:20,294
I will release you.
223
00:20:20,295 --> 00:20:22,396
No! You can't!
224
00:20:22,397 --> 00:20:24,098
Why not?
225
00:20:24,099 --> 00:20:29,314
When they put me in here, they removed
my heart, to prevent escape.
226
00:20:31,907 --> 00:20:36,506
They kept me conscious while
they did it, made me watch.
227
00:20:48,089 --> 00:20:50,392
I'm going to check the other cells.
228
00:20:55,697 --> 00:20:58,300
Don't worry, I'll be back soon.
229
00:20:59,902 --> 00:21:02,605
Kai, I'm worried about Lyekka showing up.
230
00:21:03,405 --> 00:21:04,606
You should be.
231
00:21:05,307 --> 00:21:08,108
We have to get this woman's heart
from the bridge before -
232
00:21:08,109 --> 00:21:09,910
Lyekka gets it?
233
00:21:09,911 --> 00:21:11,413
Yes.
234
00:21:12,814 --> 00:21:15,284
How will you know which one it is?
235
00:21:16,084 --> 00:21:19,488
It should be the first one in line, just like her.
236
00:21:38,607 --> 00:21:43,910
Go ahead! Do your worst, I'm ready for you -
237
00:21:44,012 --> 00:21:48,929
but if you turn your back on me for one second,
I'll rip your throat out!
238
00:21:49,384 --> 00:21:53,120
I am not your jailer.
I am Kai, last of the Brunnen G.
239
00:21:53,388 --> 00:21:57,634
You could be the last of the cockroaches
for all I care,
240
00:21:57,635 --> 00:21:59,758
I'm still gonna tear you apart!
241
00:22:11,606 --> 00:22:13,609
How's it going, 790?
242
00:22:14,609 --> 00:22:16,111
790!
243
00:22:18,413 --> 00:22:19,616
Where are you?
244
00:22:25,186 --> 00:22:27,688
Here, my love -
245
00:22:27,689 --> 00:22:30,392
but I'm more than 790 now.
246
00:22:34,296 --> 00:22:39,392
You can call me 791 - the one for you.
247
00:22:41,703 --> 00:22:44,004
It's our day of destiny, Xev.
248
00:22:44,005 --> 00:22:46,809
I am whole, and wholly yours.
249
00:22:47,609 --> 00:22:49,810
You said he was broken.
250
00:22:49,811 --> 00:22:51,914
I lied for love.
251
00:22:52,714 --> 00:22:54,815
I don't believe it.
252
00:22:54,816 --> 00:23:00,888
But it's true. Here I am, and
I can't wait to take you in my.
253
00:23:04,092 --> 00:23:06,896
No mercy. Terminate them!
254
00:23:08,997 --> 00:23:11,198
What was that?
255
00:23:11,199 --> 00:23:16,434
Part of the cyborg's control unit is body
centred. I can override it - mostly.
256
00:23:17,105 --> 00:23:19,608
Oh Xev - I don't know where to start.
257
00:23:19,908 --> 00:23:23,111
Do you want to be on top?
Should I rub you somewhere first?
258
00:23:23,211 --> 00:23:25,915
Command me, my mistress of passion!
259
00:23:28,016 --> 00:23:31,287
Not so fast, lover boy. I'm still
getting over the shock.
260
00:23:32,087 --> 00:23:34,890
The new you certainly offers a lot of -
261
00:23:35,690 --> 00:23:37,091
possibility.
262
00:23:37,092 --> 00:23:39,293
An immense possibility!
263
00:23:39,294 --> 00:23:42,197
791 will be your engine of desire.
264
00:23:42,697 --> 00:23:47,345
Gentle caresses. Full throttle animal couplings,
and everything in between.
265
00:23:47,903 --> 00:23:49,904
Our time has arrived.
266
00:23:49,905 --> 00:23:52,308
Hold me, my angel!
267
00:23:53,408 --> 00:23:55,311
New orders -
268
00:23:56,111 --> 00:23:58,814
dispose. None left alive.
269
00:24:01,116 --> 00:24:03,686
Sorry - a little glitch, nothing more.
270
00:24:04,486 --> 00:24:07,990
Xev - no-one could ever love you like I do,
271
00:24:08,890 --> 00:24:11,994
and now I finally have the equipment to prove it,
272
00:24:13,194 --> 00:24:16,699
so what in the universe is stopping us?
273
00:24:17,999 --> 00:24:22,536
Hey, I'm travelling to Barnard 17 to close a deal,
274
00:24:22,537 --> 00:24:24,805
and bam! I'm boarded. All the way!
275
00:24:25,106 --> 00:24:27,910
They're gonna do some horrible
experiments on me, right?
276
00:24:28,510 --> 00:24:32,815
Look, just find a way to get me outta here,
friend, can you, please?
277
00:24:33,615 --> 00:24:36,185
I'll - er - see what I can do.
278
00:25:01,810 --> 00:25:06,494
You weren't lying. You really
do have the equipment.
279
00:25:07,515 --> 00:25:09,585
It's all yours.
280
00:25:17,892 --> 00:25:19,695
What's wrong?
281
00:25:20,495 --> 00:25:23,998
I don't know - timing.
282
00:25:24,099 --> 00:25:26,200
We have to help Kai and Lyekka with the prisoners.
283
00:25:26,201 --> 00:25:27,801
Who cares about them?
284
00:25:27,802 --> 00:25:34,787
I do. 790, look - we can pick up
this weirdness later.
285
00:25:35,310 --> 00:25:37,613
Now, bitch, now!
286
00:25:39,014 --> 00:25:40,515
Oh, Xev - sorry.
287
00:25:41,016 --> 00:25:43,083
Maybe I should get you off of there for now?
288
00:25:43,084 --> 00:25:46,113
No, please - it's just a little feedback.
289
00:25:46,120 --> 00:25:50,119
I'm certain it's to do with those two
cables down my back that I can't reach.
290
00:25:50,120 --> 00:25:55,125
They lead directly into the body's central processor. Will you help me connect them?
291
00:25:55,897 --> 00:25:56,905
Where?
292
00:25:57,199 --> 00:25:59,002
Slide them up through the join.
293
00:26:04,105 --> 00:26:06,108
Back a little - back - to the left -
294
00:26:06,908 --> 00:26:09,011
there! Connect it right there.
295
00:26:17,506 --> 00:26:18,587
Did I get it right?
296
00:26:19,588 --> 00:26:21,889
You got it, treasure chest.
297
00:26:21,890 --> 00:26:25,094
I'm fully online, and ready to -
298
00:26:26,995 --> 00:26:29,098
Bend over, tubby!
299
00:26:39,107 --> 00:26:41,008
Hello again.
300
00:26:41,009 --> 00:26:44,052
Thank you, for rescuing me.
301
00:26:45,313 --> 00:26:47,516
But I haven't rescued you yet.
302
00:26:47,916 --> 00:26:50,586
I know, but still -
303
00:26:51,286 --> 00:26:53,489
Tell me about this planet we crashed on.
304
00:26:54,289 --> 00:26:56,290
How did you get here?
305
00:26:56,291 --> 00:26:58,093
On the Lexx.
306
00:26:58,893 --> 00:27:01,095
What is that?
307
00:27:01,096 --> 00:27:04,098
A large insect.
308
00:27:09,704 --> 00:27:11,007
790, are you there?
309
00:27:11,708 --> 00:27:12,708
Can you hear me?
310
00:27:15,110 --> 00:27:17,612
790?
311
00:27:20,015 --> 00:27:22,585
Are you completely fried?
312
00:27:58,587 --> 00:28:01,190
Xev, come in, come in, are you there?
313
00:28:02,691 --> 00:28:04,193
Xev?
314
00:28:05,594 --> 00:28:06,393
I'm here.
315
00:28:06,394 --> 00:28:08,495
So, listen - what's this about females?
316
00:28:08,496 --> 00:28:09,997
Not now, Stan.
317
00:28:09,998 --> 00:28:14,403
Look, all I wanna know is, how many
there are and what they look like.
318
00:28:14,903 --> 00:28:17,706
We don't know how many yet,
Kai's still checking.
319
00:28:18,506 --> 00:28:22,211
As for what they look like, I'm sure you would
have your own opinion, if you were here -
320
00:28:23,011 --> 00:28:25,012
but you're not.
321
00:28:25,013 --> 00:28:26,714
You're not helping me Xev.
322
00:28:26,715 --> 00:28:30,744
So look, what are they, crash survivors or what?
323
00:28:30,986 --> 00:28:32,788
They're prisoners, kidnap victims.
324
00:28:33,588 --> 00:28:37,192
Oh yeah? So, so, are they grateful to be rescued?
325
00:28:38,693 --> 00:28:41,195
You know, grateful.
326
00:28:41,196 --> 00:28:44,900
Enough questions, Stan.
I'm busy, very busy.
327
00:28:48,103 --> 00:28:51,498
790, you silly thing - you
really did it this time.
328
00:29:00,599 --> 00:29:02,099
Stan.
329
00:29:08,390 --> 00:29:12,566
Stan, it's Xev. I'm back.
330
00:29:13,695 --> 00:29:17,198
Oh come on, Xev, tell me what's
really going on down there.
331
00:29:17,198 --> 00:29:20,290
Non-stop action of the hot and sweaty kind.
332
00:29:20,300 --> 00:29:24,286
What? Oh, you're teasing me, right?
333
00:29:24,406 --> 00:29:28,212
I've just got a full report from Kai.
He's discovered an entire harem,
334
00:29:28,300 --> 00:29:31,415
very eager and very attractive -
335
00:29:31,646 --> 00:29:34,480
you should really come down and meet them.
They want to meet you.
336
00:29:34,504 --> 00:29:37,785
So, is it completely safe?
337
00:29:37,786 --> 00:29:40,489
If you want to play it that way -
but you don't have to.
338
00:29:40,499 --> 00:29:43,592
Anything goes.
339
00:29:44,292 --> 00:29:46,895
Um, well - what about Lyekka,
she get something to eat?
340
00:29:47,195 --> 00:29:52,988
Everybody eats here, Stan - and eats, and eats.
341
00:29:53,903 --> 00:29:56,605
So, so they weren't really prisoners after all?
342
00:29:56,705 --> 00:30:01,510
No. You see, it wasn't a distress call we answered
343
00:30:02,310 --> 00:30:04,315
Stan - it was a beacon of desire,
344
00:30:04,417 --> 00:30:07,094
sent by lusty sex starved sirens.
345
00:30:08,368 --> 00:30:16,191
They're aching for it, Stan. Begging for it.
They want it hard, and they want it now.
346
00:30:16,293 --> 00:30:19,147
Are you man enough to provide it?
347
00:30:20,896 --> 00:30:26,410
Bye bye Stan. See you soon.
348
00:30:33,108 --> 00:30:35,711
I don't know about this. I really don't know.
349
00:31:26,895 --> 00:31:29,096
Kai?
350
00:31:29,097 --> 00:31:31,599
Xev?
351
00:32:11,306 --> 00:32:12,606
Lyekka.
352
00:32:44,406 --> 00:32:46,408
I like prisoners.
353
00:32:55,684 --> 00:32:56,985
Xev!
354
00:32:57,986 --> 00:32:59,488
Kai!
355
00:33:24,512 --> 00:33:25,813
Kai?
356
00:33:26,014 --> 00:33:27,515
Xev?
357
00:33:27,816 --> 00:33:30,495
Up here, Stanley, we are up here!
358
00:33:42,097 --> 00:33:43,998
Ah,
359
00:33:43,999 --> 00:33:46,001
to the party!
360
00:33:48,603 --> 00:33:50,406
What's happening up there?
361
00:33:51,206 --> 00:33:53,209
Those in the cells beside you just got eaten
362
00:33:54,009 --> 00:33:55,809
By what?
363
00:33:55,810 --> 00:33:57,813
A plant.
364
00:33:58,914 --> 00:34:02,585
Now what? There's one from each end,
I didn't know which one is yours.
365
00:34:03,585 --> 00:34:07,990
I'm afraid you'll just have to choose one,
and hope it's mine.
366
00:34:19,401 --> 00:34:21,602
Are you just going to stick it in there?
367
00:34:21,603 --> 00:34:24,306
Unless you have a better idea.
368
00:34:48,196 --> 00:34:50,399
Hello?! Hello! Where are you Xev, hello!
369
00:34:51,900 --> 00:34:56,152
Down here, Stan! Down the stairs, come on!
370
00:35:11,286 --> 00:35:13,989
I don't see any party!
371
00:35:19,594 --> 00:35:23,128
Over here Stan. You're gonna love it.
372
00:35:23,198 --> 00:35:25,601
This better be good.
373
00:35:41,316 --> 00:35:43,185
I must be in the wrong place.
374
00:35:43,985 --> 00:35:48,879
Not at all, Stan. You're exactly
in the right place,
375
00:35:50,292 --> 00:35:53,596
for what I have in mind.
376
00:36:10,011 --> 00:36:12,614
Oh, yeah.
377
00:36:13,214 --> 00:36:17,285
Thrust it, monkey man -
give me some back and forth.
378
00:36:18,887 --> 00:36:21,918
Do it!
379
00:36:22,891 --> 00:36:24,693
I said do it! With feeling!
380
00:36:26,394 --> 00:36:28,397
That's right. Dance.
381
00:36:29,197 --> 00:36:32,701
Shake your lily white ass, buckaroo.
382
00:36:37,505 --> 00:36:40,208
More hips!
383
00:36:40,790 --> 00:36:41,918
Jiggle it!
384
00:36:55,592 --> 00:36:58,595
Yeah baby. Keep it slippery now.
385
00:37:16,011 --> 00:37:18,414
I owe you my life.
386
00:37:25,687 --> 00:37:27,888
Ever kissed a cyborg?
387
00:37:27,889 --> 00:37:29,390
No.
388
00:37:29,391 --> 00:37:31,194
You will.
389
00:37:34,195 --> 00:37:38,700
When I was a man, I had uncontrollable urges.
390
00:37:39,901 --> 00:37:45,425
That's why they made me into a machine.
All those urges were supposed to be erased.
391
00:37:46,808 --> 00:37:52,323
But when the prisoners reprogrammed me,
the old flame came back.
392
00:37:54,015 --> 00:37:59,386
You're not pretty - but you're
my kind of not pretty.
393
00:38:20,408 --> 00:38:22,409
I'll never tell if you don't.
394
00:38:22,410 --> 00:38:25,014
Agreed. Now just let me go.
395
00:38:27,015 --> 00:38:32,817
You're not going anywhere till I deal
with the sizzle in my pizzle.
396
00:38:35,590 --> 00:38:37,591
Do something, Tweedle!
397
00:38:37,592 --> 00:38:39,093
Like what?!
398
00:38:39,094 --> 00:38:43,398
I don't know, kill yourself! Anything
so that I don't have to go through with this!
399
00:38:43,498 --> 00:38:44,999
What about me?
400
00:38:45,000 --> 00:38:48,103
Enough! I'm in control here.
401
00:38:50,005 --> 00:38:55,356
Tweedle - I can't fight him.
Run while you can. Save Xev! Go!
402
00:39:00,515 --> 00:39:08,705
I can smell your funk, Stanley -
and I'm coming to bury my face in it!
403
00:39:14,296 --> 00:39:17,699
Stanley. Stanley -
404
00:39:18,500 --> 00:39:23,425
the head is mine. All heads are mine!
405
00:39:24,306 --> 00:39:27,209
So get ready to buckaroo.
406
00:39:35,417 --> 00:39:36,584
What's wrong?
407
00:39:36,600 --> 00:39:38,085
That's meant for me -
408
00:39:38,086 --> 00:39:39,989
not you!
409
00:39:42,390 --> 00:39:46,895
Attention, attention - the prisoner
containment area has been breached.
410
00:39:46,995 --> 00:39:49,496
������� ������������ ��������.
411
00:39:49,497 --> 00:39:53,656
Attention, attention -
security default activated.
412
00:39:56,304 --> 00:39:58,307
I have no feelings.
413
00:39:59,007 --> 00:40:01,310
I am the perfect warrior.
414
00:40:02,410 --> 00:40:05,414
I kill to live, and I live to kill.
415
00:40:06,615 --> 00:40:09,385
I was on my way to trial and execution,
416
00:40:09,505 --> 00:40:13,389
which is why I triggered the security
system when I came through the door.
417
00:40:14,189 --> 00:40:18,994
It was me who arranged for the cyborg pilot
to be reprogrammed to kill the crew.
418
00:40:20,595 --> 00:40:23,499
Of course, he wasn't supposed to crash the ship -
419
00:40:24,299 --> 00:40:26,602
but that's all behind me.
420
00:40:26,879 --> 00:40:30,806
Thank you for your assistance. Now die!
421
00:40:34,409 --> 00:40:39,013
Attention, attention - prisoner
containment is the mission priority.
422
00:40:39,115 --> 00:40:42,020
This prisoner transport will self
destruct in 10 minutes,
423
00:40:42,100 --> 00:40:44,994
as there has been a breach
of the prisoner containment area.
424
00:40:49,399 --> 00:40:55,928
I repeat - this prisoner transport will
self destruct in 9 minutes and 52 seconds.
425
00:40:56,000 --> 00:41:02,289
I repeat - this prisoner transport will
self destruct in 9 minutes and 5 seconds.
426
00:41:20,290 --> 00:41:26,494
Attention, attention - this prisoner transport will self destruct in 8 minutes and 10 seconds.
427
00:41:43,912 --> 00:41:49,384
7 minutes and 40 seconds.
428
00:42:09,504 --> 00:42:12,408
Kill to live - live to kill.
429
00:42:20,415 --> 00:42:22,383
Hello.
430
00:42:22,384 --> 00:42:24,587
How are you today?
431
00:42:28,189 --> 00:42:31,193
This will be very pleasant for you.
432
00:42:32,794 --> 00:42:35,998
- will self destruct in 3 minutes and 10 seconds.
433
00:42:54,115 --> 00:42:56,986
You're mine, concubine.
434
00:43:13,201 --> 00:43:16,905
Warning, warning - all personnel
must now be evacuated,.
435
00:43:17,105 --> 00:43:18,908
as self destruction is imminent.
436
00:43:19,308 --> 00:43:22,411
Warning, warning - all personnel
must now be evacuated,
437
00:43:23,211 --> 00:43:25,714
as self destruction is imminent.
438
00:43:43,098 --> 00:43:45,402
Who's laughing now, robot?!
439
00:44:17,098 --> 00:44:19,600
One - spread.
440
00:44:19,601 --> 00:44:22,404
Two - you're dead.
441
00:44:22,604 --> 00:44:25,105
But the ship's gonna blow up,
we'll both die!
442
00:44:25,106 --> 00:44:27,810
Warning, warning - explosive
charges are now armed.
443
00:44:28,610 --> 00:44:30,513
Self destruct in 2 minutes.
444
00:44:31,313 --> 00:44:33,816
Just enough time for a quickie.
445
00:44:34,616 --> 00:44:36,584
Stanley Tweedle -
446
00:44:36,585 --> 00:44:43,327
I have to say in all candour that without
the slightest micro-iota of inestimable doubt
447
00:44:43,400 --> 00:44:46,628
in the entirety of the two universes -
this is the very definition of misery.
448
00:44:46,630 --> 00:44:48,697
Just stop, please!
449
00:44:49,698 --> 00:44:51,901
Not his show, bitch -
450
00:44:52,701 --> 00:44:54,503
it's mine!
451
00:45:02,210 --> 00:45:04,213
Don't get up, Stanley.
452
00:45:27,702 --> 00:45:30,104
I can see that you two may
require some time alone,
453
00:45:30,105 --> 00:45:32,306
but we have to leave - now.
454
00:45:32,307 --> 00:45:33,807
Fine.
455
00:45:33,808 --> 00:45:36,511
Let's go.
456
00:45:40,916 --> 00:45:44,786
Warning, warning - explosive
charges are now armed.
457
00:45:44,790 --> 00:45:47,489
Self destruct in 1 minute.
458
00:46:19,688 --> 00:46:24,993
I am totally, completely,
and utterly humiliated.
459
00:46:25,894 --> 00:46:27,995
That's OK, forget it.
460
00:46:27,996 --> 00:46:31,199
You must understand that my intentions
were entirely honourable -
461
00:46:31,600 --> 00:46:33,801
if I had any idea the cyborg -
462
00:46:33,802 --> 00:46:36,003
I said forget it.
463
00:46:36,004 --> 00:46:37,806
You may still only be a head, 790 -
464
00:46:38,607 --> 00:46:41,210
but you're the best head I ever had.
465
00:46:50,986 --> 00:46:55,291
������������� � �������������: DarkLight
33787
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