All language subtitles for Awkwafina S01E08_English
Afrikaans
Albanian
Amharic
Arabic
Armenian
Azerbaijani
Basque
Belarusian
Bengali
Bosnian
Bulgarian
Catalan
Cebuano
Chichewa
Chinese (Simplified)
Chinese (Traditional)
Corsican
Croatian
Czech
Danish
Dutch
English
Esperanto
Estonian
Filipino
Finnish
French
Frisian
Galician
Georgian
German
Greek
Gujarati
Haitian Creole
Hausa
Hawaiian
Hebrew
Hindi
Hmong
Hungarian
Icelandic
Igbo
Indonesian
Irish
Italian
Japanese
Javanese
Kannada
Kazakh
Khmer
Korean
Kurdish (Kurmanji)
Kyrgyz
Lao
Latin
Latvian
Lithuanian
Luxembourgish
Macedonian
Malagasy
Malay
Malayalam
Maltese
Maori
Marathi
Mongolian
Myanmar (Burmese)
Nepali
Norwegian
Pashto
Persian
Polish
Portuguese
Punjabi
Romanian
Russian
Samoan
Scots Gaelic
Serbian
Sesotho
Shona
Sindhi
Sinhala
Slovak
Slovenian
Somali
Spanish
Sundanese
Swahili
Swedish
Tajik
Tamil
Telugu
Thai
Turkish
Ukrainian
Urdu
Uzbek
Vietnamese
Welsh
Xhosa
Yiddish
Yoruba
Zulu
Odia (Oriya)
Kinyarwanda
Turkmen
Tatar
Uyghur
Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated:
1
00:00:07,241 --> 00:00:08,344
[woman]
Don't lie to me!
Why were you looking at her?
2
00:00:08,413 --> 00:00:10,137
[man]
You know I care about you.
3
00:00:10,206 --> 00:00:11,793
[coughs]
4
00:00:11,862 --> 00:00:13,448
You all right, bao bao?
5
00:00:13,517 --> 00:00:15,827
Yes, I'm recovering.
I don't need
any Chinese medicine.
6
00:00:15,896 --> 00:00:17,413
I make you some soup!
7
00:00:17,482 --> 00:00:18,793
Oh, cool.
8
00:00:18,862 --> 00:00:22,448
Yeah, with Chinese
yams and ramen.
9
00:00:22,517 --> 00:00:24,758
It's good for you.
10
00:00:24,827 --> 00:00:26,655
And it's good
for your skin.
11
00:00:26,724 --> 00:00:28,344
Uh, you know what?
I'm doing good for right now.
12
00:00:28,413 --> 00:00:31,551
'Cause I have Amer-- I have
American stuff, thanks.
13
00:00:31,620 --> 00:00:34,103
What are you watching?"Love Island."
14
00:00:34,172 --> 00:00:37,172
It's episode 48 of 52,
season three.
15
00:00:37,241 --> 00:00:39,655
Oh my God-- what?
16
00:00:39,724 --> 00:00:41,413
Those people
are gutter trash.
17
00:00:41,482 --> 00:00:44,724
Hey! Hey!
Wha-- wha-- Grandma!
18
00:00:44,793 --> 00:00:46,206
You're never
gonna get better
19
00:00:46,275 --> 00:00:48,310
by being on the phone
all the time.
20
00:00:48,379 --> 00:00:49,862
My life is
really hard right now.
21
00:00:49,931 --> 00:00:51,206
Can you give me
my phone please?
22
00:00:51,275 --> 00:00:53,551
You wanna hear
about a hard life?
23
00:00:53,620 --> 00:00:55,655
Let me tell you a story.
24
00:00:55,724 --> 00:00:58,551
From, like, orally?
Like an oral story?
25
00:00:58,620 --> 00:01:00,931
It's the true story
26
00:01:01,000 --> 00:01:03,793
about how your Grandma
27
00:01:03,862 --> 00:01:06,103
met your Grandpa.
28
00:01:06,172 --> 00:01:09,000
Um, do I-- I'm good
for now, or...
29
00:01:09,068 --> 00:01:10,689
Let's do this!
30
00:01:10,758 --> 00:01:14,413
♪♪
31
00:01:22,517 --> 00:01:24,310
[man singing in Chinese]
32
00:01:24,379 --> 00:01:26,000
[Nora]
Oh, oh, no.
33
00:01:26,068 --> 00:01:28,344
Is this gonna be like
one of those Korean dramas?
34
00:01:28,413 --> 00:01:30,965
[Grandma]
You know it.
35
00:01:31,034 --> 00:01:33,344
[Nora]
What?! That--
that's my title card?
36
00:01:33,413 --> 00:01:35,793
Why do you gotta put
my title card like that?
37
00:01:35,862 --> 00:01:37,551
Ah! They didn't
put my real name!
38
00:01:37,620 --> 00:01:39,172
[sneezing]
39
00:01:39,241 --> 00:01:41,827
[singing continues]
40
00:01:41,896 --> 00:01:46,172
♪♪
41
00:01:46,241 --> 00:01:49,379
Wait, wait-wait-wait.
That's supposed to be you?
42
00:01:49,448 --> 00:01:51,862
Grandma, you were hot
and five-foot-ten?
43
00:01:51,931 --> 00:01:53,758
[Grandma]
Yeah, and I'm still hot.
44
00:01:53,827 --> 00:01:56,275
Anyways, the story begins
45
00:01:56,344 --> 00:01:59,724
back on my family's estate
in rural China.
46
00:01:59,793 --> 00:02:03,724
It was 1965.
My family was wealthy.
47
00:02:03,793 --> 00:02:05,413
So I spent my days doing
48
00:02:05,482 --> 00:02:09,000
what all rich girls
like to do in 1965.
49
00:02:09,068 --> 00:02:10,896
Sit under a parasol
50
00:02:10,965 --> 00:02:14,000
and stare at things
for a long time.
51
00:02:14,068 --> 00:02:16,689
It was nice to be rich.
52
00:02:16,758 --> 00:02:19,482
Hello, Mr. and Mrs. Chen.
53
00:02:19,551 --> 00:02:20,896
[Nora]
You spoke English?
54
00:02:20,965 --> 00:02:22,448
[Grandma]
I spoke Chinese,
55
00:02:22,517 --> 00:02:25,689
but I'm translating
to make it easier for you.
56
00:02:25,758 --> 00:02:27,413
[Nora]
O-- okay.
57
00:02:27,482 --> 00:02:30,482
[Grandma]
Life was good, until one day
58
00:02:30,551 --> 00:02:32,275
our garbage man...
59
00:02:34,931 --> 00:02:35,862
...dropped dead.
60
00:02:35,931 --> 00:02:37,172
[Nora]
Oh, shit!
61
00:02:37,241 --> 00:02:38,655
[Grandma]
Oh, it's okay.
62
00:02:38,724 --> 00:02:41,275
Because he was immediately
replaced by...
63
00:02:41,344 --> 00:02:43,137
[sensuous music]
64
00:02:43,206 --> 00:02:46,724
♪ Ooh... ♪
65
00:02:46,793 --> 00:02:47,896
♪♪
66
00:02:47,965 --> 00:02:48,965
[man, whispering]
Garbage Boy.
67
00:02:49,034 --> 00:02:53,034
♪ Oh yeah ♪
68
00:02:53,103 --> 00:02:57,034
♪ I'm cryin' out to you ♪
69
00:02:57,103 --> 00:02:58,862
♪ Baby ♪
70
00:02:58,931 --> 00:03:01,586
[Nora]
Oh, my God, that is literally
so fucking gross right now.
71
00:03:01,655 --> 00:03:05,482
[Grandma]
No! Garbage Boy was so hot.
72
00:03:05,551 --> 00:03:08,758
All I wanted was to get
his attention.
73
00:03:08,827 --> 00:03:11,965
♪ Now, pretty baby, ooh ♪
74
00:03:12,034 --> 00:03:13,758
♪ Tell me ♪
75
00:03:13,827 --> 00:03:18,068
♪ Do you like what you see?
'Cause you know... ♪
76
00:03:18,137 --> 00:03:20,310
You done with that milk?
77
00:03:20,379 --> 00:03:22,310
I am now.
78
00:03:22,379 --> 00:03:24,344
There's still a bit left.
79
00:03:24,413 --> 00:03:28,965
♪ Something's
coming over me ♪
80
00:03:29,034 --> 00:03:32,482
♪ Is it love? ♪
81
00:03:32,551 --> 00:03:35,000
Beautiful watch...
82
00:03:35,068 --> 00:03:37,275
...for a beautiful girl.This old thing?
83
00:03:37,344 --> 00:03:39,862
It's a family heirloom,
I just...
84
00:03:39,931 --> 00:03:43,482
[Grandma]
And just like that,
he took my breath away.
85
00:03:43,551 --> 00:03:47,724
I knew right then that I
needed to be with that boy.
86
00:03:47,793 --> 00:03:49,758
[Nora]
The kid that chugs
your old milk?
87
00:03:49,827 --> 00:03:52,137
[Grandma]
Oh, you sound like my mother.
88
00:03:52,206 --> 00:03:56,551
She completely disapproved
of me dating Garbage Boy.
89
00:03:56,620 --> 00:03:59,103
[speaking Chinese]
90
00:04:01,896 --> 00:04:03,724
I don't wanna be
with a rich boy.
91
00:04:03,793 --> 00:04:05,655
Garbage Boy
is not trash!
92
00:04:05,724 --> 00:04:08,620
[speaking Chinese]
93
00:04:08,689 --> 00:04:10,586
Milk doesn't even expire.
94
00:04:10,655 --> 00:04:12,517
♪♪
95
00:04:12,586 --> 00:04:16,965
[Grandma]
But my mother's disapproval
only made me want him more.
96
00:04:17,034 --> 00:04:18,413
♪♪
97
00:04:18,482 --> 00:04:21,413
Garbage Boy and I exchanged
notes in secret.
98
00:04:24,724 --> 00:04:29,137
One day, I was able to sneak
away for just long enough.
99
00:04:29,206 --> 00:04:32,137
[woman singing in Chinese]
100
00:04:32,206 --> 00:04:35,172
♪♪
101
00:04:39,689 --> 00:04:41,310
[Nora]
That's a whole lotta lip
there, Grandma.
102
00:04:41,379 --> 00:04:43,931
[Grandma, chucking]
Yes, we didn't use tongue
103
00:04:44,000 --> 00:04:47,000
because it wasn't
of the era.
104
00:04:47,068 --> 00:04:49,655
So then y'all smashed,
Had a couple babies.
105
00:04:49,724 --> 00:04:52,655
Here I am now, um...
I gotta check my Weibo.
106
00:04:52,724 --> 00:04:55,034
Hey! This story's not over!
107
00:04:55,103 --> 00:04:58,655
Things were going really well.
108
00:04:58,724 --> 00:05:01,655
Until 1966.
109
00:05:01,724 --> 00:05:04,551
It was the start
of the Cultural Revolution.
110
00:05:04,620 --> 00:05:07,758
A time when rich people
and intellectuals were forced
111
00:05:07,827 --> 00:05:11,586
by the government to destroy
any sign of wealth and status.
112
00:05:11,655 --> 00:05:15,482
Even though my family was
wealthy and therefore targets,
113
00:05:15,551 --> 00:05:18,206
I still had other
things on my mind.
114
00:05:18,275 --> 00:05:20,724
♪♪
115
00:05:29,827 --> 00:05:31,310
[gasps]What up, girl?
116
00:05:31,379 --> 00:05:32,758
It me, Shu Shu.
117
00:05:32,827 --> 00:05:35,862
[man, whispering]
Shu Shu.
118
00:05:35,931 --> 00:05:37,758
[Nora]
You mean, Shu Shu, Shu Shu?
119
00:05:37,827 --> 00:05:39,862
The one who couldn't
go to Atlantic City?
120
00:05:39,931 --> 00:05:42,241
[Grandma]
Yeah, my best friend from China.
121
00:05:42,310 --> 00:05:45,034
[wind gusting]We told each other everything.
122
00:05:45,103 --> 00:05:47,137
Hello, Best Friend
Shu Shu.
123
00:05:47,206 --> 00:05:49,103
Sorry for the wide smile.
124
00:05:49,172 --> 00:05:51,586
I'm just... so in love.
125
00:05:51,655 --> 00:05:54,034
Oh, really?
With who?
126
00:05:54,103 --> 00:05:57,034
The boy who takes
out our garbage.
127
00:05:57,103 --> 00:05:59,103
[whispers]
Garbage Boy.
Oh, Garbage Boy.
128
00:05:59,172 --> 00:06:01,172
He is fine.
Saw him rip apart
129
00:06:01,241 --> 00:06:04,103
a cardboard box once.
No scissors, shit was sick.
130
00:06:04,172 --> 00:06:05,344
[sighs]
131
00:06:05,413 --> 00:06:08,137
Anyway, enough about me.
How are you, Shu Shu?
132
00:06:08,206 --> 00:06:10,689
I'm in love, too.With who?
133
00:06:10,758 --> 00:06:13,310
Mao Zedong.
134
00:06:13,379 --> 00:06:15,793
Chairman Mao?
Was he hot?
135
00:06:15,862 --> 00:06:17,172
Shu Shu thought so.
136
00:06:17,241 --> 00:06:19,034
Chairman Mao's so smart.
137
00:06:19,103 --> 00:06:21,034
He's got this awesome
place out in the countryside
138
00:06:21,103 --> 00:06:23,000
called the village.
Hmm.
139
00:06:23,068 --> 00:06:24,931
We're all going
to be, like...
140
00:06:25,000 --> 00:06:29,551
joining the working class,
working the fields.
141
00:06:29,620 --> 00:06:31,931
It'll be rustic AF, bitch.
142
00:06:32,000 --> 00:06:35,068
I don't know,
I don't really like fields.
143
00:06:35,137 --> 00:06:38,034
You know, and the rows of
plants really freak me out.
144
00:06:38,103 --> 00:06:41,655
Besides, the love
of my life is here.
145
00:06:41,724 --> 00:06:44,620
Fine. Suit yourself.
146
00:06:44,689 --> 00:06:46,827
More rural "D" for me.
147
00:06:49,551 --> 00:06:53,000
[Grandma]
Things would only get more
complicated from there.
148
00:06:53,068 --> 00:06:56,655
My neighbors, the Chens,
were caught with valuables.
149
00:06:56,724 --> 00:06:59,379
So the Red Guard,
Mao's law enforcers
150
00:06:59,448 --> 00:07:02,931
made them leave the city
to work in the countryside
151
00:07:03,000 --> 00:07:06,172
which meant we had to throw away
all our valuables.
152
00:07:06,241 --> 00:07:08,517
- [Nora] Everything?
- [Grandma] Everything!
153
00:07:08,586 --> 00:07:12,344
Even the expensive
China that was in our family
for generations.
154
00:07:12,413 --> 00:07:15,586
My parents didn't want to show
any signs of our wealth.
155
00:07:15,655 --> 00:07:19,103
Otherwise, we'd be forced
to go to the deep countryside.
156
00:07:19,172 --> 00:07:21,103
Work on a farm.[loud shattering]
157
00:07:21,172 --> 00:07:23,482
[Nora]
Like Paris Hilton and Nicole
Richie did on "The Simple Life?"
158
00:07:23,551 --> 00:07:25,448
[Grandma]
Yeah! Just like that!
159
00:07:25,517 --> 00:07:28,827
I didn't want to do it,
but we had to.
160
00:07:28,896 --> 00:07:32,793
I just figured with more trash,
comes more garbage.
161
00:07:32,862 --> 00:07:37,241
And with more garbage
comes Garbage Boy.
162
00:07:37,310 --> 00:07:40,137
But still, we couldn't
avoid the Red Guard.
163
00:07:40,206 --> 00:07:41,724
Is that a valuable
wrist watch?
164
00:07:43,241 --> 00:07:45,931
No, no it's not.Destroy it at once!
165
00:07:46,000 --> 00:07:48,793
You can't.
Please, this is the one--
166
00:07:48,862 --> 00:07:50,379
This is the one
Garbage Boy complimented--
167
00:07:50,448 --> 00:07:51,758
♪♪
168
00:07:51,827 --> 00:07:55,068
[distorted laughter]
169
00:07:55,137 --> 00:07:59,655
[moaning in slow motion]
170
00:07:59,724 --> 00:08:01,586
[glass shattering]
171
00:08:03,620 --> 00:08:06,103
[Grandma]
And that wasn't the worst part.
172
00:08:06,172 --> 00:08:09,172
My refusal to immediately
give up the watch
173
00:08:09,241 --> 00:08:11,482
was considered
an act of defiance.
174
00:08:11,551 --> 00:08:13,655
We were now targets
of Chairman Mao.
175
00:08:13,724 --> 00:08:15,689
We needed to flee.
176
00:08:15,758 --> 00:08:17,482
[shouting in Chinese]
177
00:08:17,551 --> 00:08:20,827
No, I can't!
178
00:08:20,896 --> 00:08:22,344
[whispers]
Garbage Boy.
179
00:08:22,413 --> 00:08:24,000
[Grandma]
My parents paid
a local smuggler
180
00:08:24,068 --> 00:08:25,965
for safe passage
to Hong Kong.
181
00:08:26,034 --> 00:08:28,724
And from there,
we travelled to America.
182
00:08:28,793 --> 00:08:30,827
And we had to leave right away.
183
00:08:30,896 --> 00:08:33,068
But I couldn't go without
telling Garbage Boy.
184
00:08:36,344 --> 00:08:38,172
[Nora]
Wait! Wait-wait-wait!
185
00:08:38,241 --> 00:08:39,862
So you left and you
never talked to him?!
186
00:08:39,931 --> 00:08:41,241
Did you get his number?
187
00:08:41,310 --> 00:08:43,379
[Grandma]
Shh! Just listen.
188
00:08:43,448 --> 00:08:45,551
[rodent chittering]
189
00:08:45,620 --> 00:08:48,172
[wind gusting]
190
00:08:48,241 --> 00:08:51,206
♪♪
191
00:08:57,000 --> 00:08:58,620
What happens next?
192
00:08:58,689 --> 00:09:00,655
Well...
193
00:09:00,724 --> 00:09:04,000
I met a new man...
194
00:09:04,068 --> 00:09:05,655
...in America.
195
00:09:05,724 --> 00:09:08,000
[bird screeches]What?!
196
00:09:09,448 --> 00:09:11,620
[Grandma]
I finally made it
to New York City.
197
00:09:11,689 --> 00:09:14,931
I forged a nursing degree
and soon had a job
198
00:09:15,000 --> 00:09:18,034
at Flushing West Hospital
where I made friends
199
00:09:18,103 --> 00:09:20,034
with other
renowned immigrants.
200
00:09:20,103 --> 00:09:21,620
[exclaims] Another one
bites the dust.
201
00:09:21,689 --> 00:09:22,689
What?
202
00:09:22,758 --> 00:09:24,758
Another eligible
bachelor, married.
203
00:09:24,827 --> 00:09:26,724
Reading the wedding
announcements again?
204
00:09:26,793 --> 00:09:28,517
Of course!
A girl's got to find
205
00:09:28,586 --> 00:09:30,241
a man and a green
card somehow.
206
00:09:30,310 --> 00:09:32,413
I was a diplomat
in Haiti.
207
00:09:32,482 --> 00:09:34,241
I can't even get
a second date here.
208
00:09:34,310 --> 00:09:35,551
America is crazy.
209
00:09:35,620 --> 00:09:38,241
He's a mailman.
Spending that much money?
210
00:09:38,310 --> 00:09:40,172
[speaking Spanish]
211
00:09:40,241 --> 00:09:41,758
In Puerto Rico,
he's what we call
212
00:09:41,827 --> 00:09:44,241
a squash
that is showing off.
213
00:09:44,310 --> 00:09:47,275
Probably because he has
a very small squash, hey?
214
00:09:47,344 --> 00:09:50,620
[all laughing]
215
00:09:50,689 --> 00:09:51,655
[sighing]
216
00:09:51,724 --> 00:09:52,827
How about you,
Young Grandma?
217
00:09:52,896 --> 00:09:54,931
Is there anyone
you've been eyeing?
218
00:09:55,000 --> 00:09:56,896
No, not really.
219
00:09:56,965 --> 00:09:58,758
[Grandma]
And then I saw him.
220
00:09:58,827 --> 00:10:00,827
♪ Let's do this for real ♪
221
00:10:00,896 --> 00:10:03,344
♪♪
222
00:10:03,413 --> 00:10:07,793
♪ I know you wanna
feel, baby ♪
223
00:10:07,862 --> 00:10:10,172
♪ Wanna take you
off the grill ♪
224
00:10:10,241 --> 00:10:12,655
♪ Take for the chill ♪
225
00:10:12,724 --> 00:10:15,206
♪ Do this thing for real ♪
226
00:10:15,275 --> 00:10:17,758
[man, whispering]
Doc Hottie.
227
00:10:17,827 --> 00:10:20,103
♪♪
228
00:10:20,172 --> 00:10:22,586
It's very unsanitary.
Yeah.
229
00:10:22,655 --> 00:10:25,068
But Grandma liked it.
230
00:10:25,137 --> 00:10:26,551
[Grandma]
Over the next few weeks,
231
00:10:26,620 --> 00:10:30,103
Doc Hottie and I were
inseparable.
232
00:10:30,172 --> 00:10:32,827
He had everything
I could have wanted.
233
00:10:32,896 --> 00:10:35,724
Money, cars, charm.
234
00:10:35,793 --> 00:10:39,103
It was the American Dream.
235
00:10:39,172 --> 00:10:41,827
[Nora]
Grandma, what kind of--
what kind of effects are these?
236
00:10:41,896 --> 00:10:44,655
[Grandma]
It's a K Drama.
We don't have the budget.
237
00:10:44,724 --> 00:10:46,275
[Nora]
Who-- who is we?
238
00:10:46,344 --> 00:10:50,068
[Grandma]
Everything was going
splendidly... until...
239
00:10:50,137 --> 00:10:53,551
♪♪
240
00:10:53,620 --> 00:10:56,551
Babe, aren't you gonna
pick up your trash?
241
00:10:56,620 --> 00:10:57,724
Oh, don't worry
about it, babe.
242
00:10:57,793 --> 00:11:00,448
Someone will pick
it up, come on.
243
00:11:00,517 --> 00:11:02,103
♪♪
244
00:11:02,172 --> 00:11:05,758
Babe... babe.
245
00:11:05,827 --> 00:11:09,379
[echoing]
Babe? Babe?
246
00:11:09,448 --> 00:11:11,586
Look at me.
Ice cream's melting.
Come on, babe.
247
00:11:11,655 --> 00:11:13,344
[woman]
Look out.
248
00:11:13,413 --> 00:11:16,482
[all screaming]Oh, God, no!
249
00:11:16,551 --> 00:11:21,137
[piano keys striking,
wood splintering]
250
00:11:21,206 --> 00:11:24,758
[Nora]
A piano fell on his head?
That didn't happen.
251
00:11:24,827 --> 00:11:26,896
It's real.Did Doc Hottie die?
252
00:11:26,965 --> 00:11:29,965
No, but something
even worse happened.
253
00:11:30,034 --> 00:11:33,517
What?He survived.
254
00:11:33,586 --> 00:11:37,034
[gasping]
255
00:11:37,103 --> 00:11:39,275
Sweetie.
256
00:11:39,344 --> 00:11:41,931
Please don't be ugly.
Please don't be ugly.
257
00:11:44,379 --> 00:11:46,620
[exhales]
258
00:11:46,689 --> 00:11:48,793
Oh, thank God.
259
00:11:48,862 --> 00:11:50,758
Who are you?
260
00:11:50,827 --> 00:11:52,551
It's me.
261
00:11:52,620 --> 00:11:54,862
Your girlfriend,
Young Grandma.
262
00:11:54,931 --> 00:11:58,517
I don't-- I don't know
why you are.
263
00:11:58,586 --> 00:12:00,103
♪♪
264
00:12:00,172 --> 00:12:01,896
[sighs deeply]
265
00:12:01,965 --> 00:12:04,758
[Grandma]
Doc Hottie had amnesia.
266
00:12:04,827 --> 00:12:06,413
[gasps]
Oh, my God!
267
00:12:06,482 --> 00:12:10,310
But all your piggyback rides?
Viewing the State of Liberty?
268
00:12:10,379 --> 00:12:13,137
I know.
It was horrible.
269
00:12:13,206 --> 00:12:16,137
[Grandma]
I just wanted to get home
and cry forever.
270
00:12:16,206 --> 00:12:18,344
♪♪
271
00:12:18,413 --> 00:12:20,758
58th and Main, please.
272
00:12:20,827 --> 00:12:24,068
Right the way, ma'am.
273
00:12:24,137 --> 00:12:25,655
Garbage Boy?!
274
00:12:25,724 --> 00:12:27,448
[Nora]
What? He's in America now?
275
00:12:27,517 --> 00:12:29,413
But I thought your note
flew away?
276
00:12:29,482 --> 00:12:32,344
[Grandma]
Oh, it did.
But it must've been fate.
277
00:12:32,413 --> 00:12:34,034
Or because the local smuggler
278
00:12:34,103 --> 00:12:36,482
always brought people
into Queens first.
279
00:12:36,551 --> 00:12:39,034
Garbage Boy and I
started talking
280
00:12:39,103 --> 00:12:41,379
like no time had passed.
281
00:12:41,448 --> 00:12:43,172
It was magical.
282
00:12:43,241 --> 00:12:46,275
We ended up spending
the whole night together.
283
00:12:46,344 --> 00:12:47,586
[Nora]
Doing what?
284
00:12:47,655 --> 00:12:49,689
- [Grandma] Just holding hands.
- [Nora] No!
285
00:12:49,758 --> 00:12:51,655
[Grandma]
We threaded our fingers,
286
00:12:51,724 --> 00:12:55,034
then moonwalked across
each other's palms.
287
00:12:55,103 --> 00:12:57,862
We scissored so slowly.
288
00:12:57,931 --> 00:13:01,137
I did the "farting rocket
into the hole."
289
00:13:01,206 --> 00:13:03,931
We slapped each other's hands
till they were raw.
290
00:13:04,000 --> 00:13:07,241
Up and down and up and down.
291
00:13:07,310 --> 00:13:10,413
Oh, Lord, Lord,
he blew my mind!
292
00:13:12,344 --> 00:13:15,206
Grandma!
You don't have to--
293
00:13:15,275 --> 00:13:18,103
I don't need to see--
Grandma, stop![chuckles]
294
00:13:18,172 --> 00:13:20,344
It was a wonderful night.
295
00:13:20,413 --> 00:13:22,724
I couldn't wait
to tell my friends.
296
00:13:22,793 --> 00:13:25,103
Oh, that is
so romantic.
297
00:13:25,172 --> 00:13:28,103
I'm so happy for you.
What was his name again?
298
00:13:28,172 --> 00:13:29,620
Garbage Boy.
299
00:13:29,689 --> 00:13:31,655
Wait. Garbage Boy.
300
00:13:31,724 --> 00:13:35,034
I have heard
that name.
301
00:13:35,103 --> 00:13:38,586
Oh! He is getting...
married!
302
00:13:38,655 --> 00:13:41,413
Oh, hell no!
303
00:13:42,724 --> 00:13:43,931
What'd you do with
that man slut Garbage Boy?
304
00:13:44,000 --> 00:13:45,827
I mean, how did you
get past that
305
00:13:45,896 --> 00:13:49,344
It was a dark time
in my life.
306
00:13:49,413 --> 00:13:52,655
My only happiness was in
this new hip flavor,
307
00:13:52,724 --> 00:13:55,965
Diet Neapolitan.
308
00:13:56,034 --> 00:13:58,586
I couldn't stop thinking
about Garbage Boy.
309
00:13:58,655 --> 00:14:01,724
Everywhere I looked,
there he was.
310
00:14:01,793 --> 00:14:04,344
And he called every day.[telephone ringing]
311
00:14:04,413 --> 00:14:06,689
[Nora]
You didn't answer it,
though, right, Grandma?
312
00:14:06,758 --> 00:14:08,827
'Cause-- 'cause
fuck that dude, right?
313
00:14:08,896 --> 00:14:10,862
[Grandma]
Exactly. Fuck that dude.
314
00:14:10,931 --> 00:14:14,517
[telephone ringing]But I'll admit,
he was persistent.
315
00:14:14,586 --> 00:14:16,551
[knocking on door]I said I didn't--
316
00:14:16,620 --> 00:14:20,275
Young Grandma.
Doc Hottie.
317
00:14:20,344 --> 00:14:23,689
My memory's back.
I'm cured of my amnesia.
318
00:14:23,758 --> 00:14:27,206
I remember our love.
I remember everything.
319
00:14:30,206 --> 00:14:31,724
Let's get married.
320
00:14:31,793 --> 00:14:34,482
♪♪
321
00:14:34,551 --> 00:14:37,793
What? How many goddamn
plot twists you got
in this story, Grandma?
322
00:14:37,862 --> 00:14:42,275
♪♪
323
00:14:42,344 --> 00:14:44,172
You've been
through a lot.
324
00:14:44,241 --> 00:14:46,172
Weeping because
of my amnesia.
325
00:14:46,241 --> 00:14:48,689
You don't have to
give me an answer now.
326
00:14:51,000 --> 00:14:53,034
I'm going
to the hospital.
327
00:14:53,103 --> 00:14:55,275
They're letting me
do surgery again.
328
00:14:55,344 --> 00:14:59,758
This new procedure
called... kidney transplant.
329
00:14:59,827 --> 00:15:01,551
Oh.
330
00:15:01,620 --> 00:15:03,000
Find me
when you're ready.
331
00:15:05,103 --> 00:15:08,482
[Nora]
Wow. So--
so you said yes, right?
332
00:15:08,551 --> 00:15:10,655
[Grandma]
I didn't know what to do.
333
00:15:10,724 --> 00:15:12,827
Doc Hottie wanted to marry me,
334
00:15:12,896 --> 00:15:16,310
but I couldn't stop thinking
about Garbage Boy.
335
00:15:16,379 --> 00:15:18,758
And Camren and Lehana
were no help.
336
00:15:18,827 --> 00:15:21,103
Garbage Boy's
the love of your life.
337
00:15:21,172 --> 00:15:22,724
You can stop his wedding.
338
00:15:22,793 --> 00:15:24,344
Ah, but Doc Hottie
will hook you up.
339
00:15:24,413 --> 00:15:26,620
He's rich.
Your parents adore him.
340
00:15:26,689 --> 00:15:28,241
It's a no brainer.
Marry him.
341
00:15:28,310 --> 00:15:29,965
[Grandma]
I was lost.
342
00:15:30,034 --> 00:15:32,448
Until guess who
walked through the door.
343
00:15:32,517 --> 00:15:34,172
What up?[Nora]
What?!
344
00:15:34,241 --> 00:15:36,586
It me, Shu Shu.
345
00:15:36,655 --> 00:15:39,275
In America![both laughing]
346
00:15:39,344 --> 00:15:41,344
Doop doop boop boop!
347
00:15:41,413 --> 00:15:42,724
[both, laughing]
Boop!
348
00:15:42,793 --> 00:15:44,413
[Nora]
How did Shu Shu get there?
349
00:15:44,482 --> 00:15:46,344
It was a crazy story.
350
00:15:46,413 --> 00:15:49,379
[spotlights switching on,
dramatic music swelling]
351
00:15:49,448 --> 00:15:53,689
♪♪
352
00:15:53,758 --> 00:15:57,965
[Shu Shu]
So, I stayed in China and
ended up in the countryside.
353
00:15:58,034 --> 00:16:00,724
But I quickly learned
that I did not belong there.
354
00:16:00,793 --> 00:16:04,517
The work was hard.
I did not like manual labor.
355
00:16:04,586 --> 00:16:07,517
And there were so many bugs.
356
00:16:07,586 --> 00:16:08,931
[thunder rumbling]
357
00:16:09,000 --> 00:16:12,827
One, I got caught in a mudslide
and was washed away.
358
00:16:12,896 --> 00:16:15,448
Even though I still loved
Chairman Mao,
359
00:16:15,517 --> 00:16:18,655
I decided that I needed
to get out of China.
360
00:16:18,724 --> 00:16:21,103
So I swam to Hong Kong.
361
00:16:21,172 --> 00:16:23,931
Almost getting eating
by sharks along the way.
362
00:16:24,000 --> 00:16:25,586
Nooo!
363
00:16:25,655 --> 00:16:28,586
And then I made it
to New York.
364
00:16:28,655 --> 00:16:32,275
So, that's my update.
What about you?
365
00:16:32,344 --> 00:16:35,862
[Grandma]
I told Shu Shu everything
about Doc Hottie
and Garbage Boy,
366
00:16:35,931 --> 00:16:40,000
except I didn't have puppets,
so my story was
way more boring.
367
00:16:40,068 --> 00:16:41,448
So what do I do?
368
00:16:41,517 --> 00:16:43,620
We did not come to this
country to settle.
369
00:16:43,689 --> 00:16:45,413
I got washed in a mudslide
370
00:16:45,482 --> 00:16:47,241
and fought 75 sharks
to get here.
371
00:16:47,310 --> 00:16:49,482
You are too hot
and too smart
372
00:16:49,551 --> 00:16:52,517
to be anything less
than the Plan "A"
bitch you are.
373
00:16:52,586 --> 00:16:55,965
Yeah.So what do you want?
374
00:16:56,034 --> 00:16:58,551
♪♪
375
00:16:58,620 --> 00:17:02,344
Love.
Then go...
376
00:17:02,413 --> 00:17:04,482
...get...
377
00:17:04,551 --> 00:17:05,827
...it.
378
00:17:05,896 --> 00:17:07,206
You're right.
379
00:17:07,275 --> 00:17:09,137
I'm gonna get
what I want.
380
00:17:12,206 --> 00:17:14,000
Wait, so who are
you gonna choose?
381
00:17:14,068 --> 00:17:15,827
Doctor Dick
or Garbage Dick?
382
00:17:15,896 --> 00:17:19,655
Either way, get that
nasty shit, girl!
383
00:17:19,724 --> 00:17:21,827
Doc Hottie.
384
00:17:21,896 --> 00:17:24,137
You came.
I knew you would.
385
00:17:24,206 --> 00:17:26,379
Actually, I came be
to give you this.
386
00:17:26,448 --> 00:17:27,793
Uh...
387
00:17:27,862 --> 00:17:30,724
Uh...
388
00:17:30,793 --> 00:17:33,689
Why?I think you're wonderful.
389
00:17:33,758 --> 00:17:36,793
And a doctor
and for all the reasons
why I should love you.
390
00:17:36,862 --> 00:17:38,689
I'm just in love
with someone else.
391
00:17:38,758 --> 00:17:41,689
But--
Sorry.
392
00:17:41,758 --> 00:17:43,206
No.
I'm so sorry.
393
00:17:43,275 --> 00:17:46,103
Young Grandma...
Young Grandma!
394
00:17:46,172 --> 00:17:49,137
[monitor flat-lining]
395
00:17:52,862 --> 00:17:54,827
Stop the wedding.
396
00:17:54,896 --> 00:17:57,206
Young Grandma.
397
00:17:57,275 --> 00:18:00,206
♪♪
398
00:18:00,275 --> 00:18:01,551
Ohh!
399
00:18:01,620 --> 00:18:03,241
It's not
what it looks like.
400
00:18:03,310 --> 00:18:05,793
Oh, thank God.She's my sister.
401
00:18:05,862 --> 00:18:08,275
[both]
What?! That's fuckin' gross.
402
00:18:08,344 --> 00:18:10,103
It's not what
it is sounds like.
403
00:18:10,172 --> 00:18:11,827
My sister was sponsored
to come to the States
404
00:18:11,896 --> 00:18:14,172
by the Lao family here.
405
00:18:14,241 --> 00:18:16,517
They were only allowed
to sponsor their own
family, though,
406
00:18:16,586 --> 00:18:18,275
so she lived here
as their daughter.
407
00:18:18,344 --> 00:18:19,620
She even took on
their last name.
408
00:18:19,689 --> 00:18:21,655
Then in order
for me to come over,
409
00:18:21,724 --> 00:18:23,068
we were to be married.
410
00:18:23,137 --> 00:18:25,068
The marriage is just
for citizenship, though.
411
00:18:25,137 --> 00:18:26,965
We're divorced immediately
412
00:18:27,034 --> 00:18:28,551
and then we'll be free
to live our lives.
413
00:18:28,620 --> 00:18:30,896
Wow, that sounds like
a really weird loophole.
414
00:18:30,965 --> 00:18:33,758
I know, but it's true.
It's why I've been calling.
415
00:18:33,827 --> 00:18:36,379
Ever since that night,
I've been trying to explain.
416
00:18:36,448 --> 00:18:38,344
Mmm-mm-mm, no!
417
00:18:38,413 --> 00:18:40,586
What could he possibly say
to make this okay?
418
00:18:40,655 --> 00:18:43,310
Hold on.
419
00:18:43,379 --> 00:18:46,000
I've been meaning
to give this back to you.
420
00:18:46,068 --> 00:18:48,965
Ohh! It's my watch.
421
00:18:49,034 --> 00:18:51,103
But it was
completely trashed.
422
00:18:51,172 --> 00:18:52,931
Not all trash
is garbage.
423
00:18:53,000 --> 00:18:54,931
[Nora]
Oh, hell yeah,
Garbage Boy!
424
00:18:55,000 --> 00:18:56,793
After the Red Guard
threw it away,
425
00:18:56,862 --> 00:18:58,310
I spent years
fixing it.
426
00:18:58,379 --> 00:19:01,068
I knew that...
I had to get it back to you.
427
00:19:01,137 --> 00:19:02,310
Where it belonged.
428
00:19:02,379 --> 00:19:05,827
A beautiful watch
for a beautiful girl.
429
00:19:07,448 --> 00:19:09,344
Go marry your sister.
430
00:19:09,413 --> 00:19:12,275
♪♪
431
00:19:12,344 --> 00:19:16,034
[officiant]
I now pronounce you
Mr. and Mrs. Lin.
432
00:19:16,103 --> 00:19:18,758
[cheering and applause]
433
00:19:18,827 --> 00:19:20,827
♪♪
434
00:19:25,689 --> 00:19:29,689
Garbage Boy was Grandpa?
435
00:19:29,758 --> 00:19:31,517
This was taken
on my wedding day.
436
00:19:31,586 --> 00:19:33,620
Oh, wow.
437
00:19:33,689 --> 00:19:34,896
You know, I thought
my life was hard.
438
00:19:34,965 --> 00:19:37,896
Well, life can be hard,
but it's much easier
439
00:19:37,965 --> 00:19:40,137
when you have
something you love.
440
00:19:40,206 --> 00:19:42,310
Yeah.
441
00:19:42,379 --> 00:19:45,310
All right,
time for bed.
442
00:19:45,379 --> 00:19:47,620
And here.
443
00:19:47,689 --> 00:19:49,448
For being such
a good listener,
444
00:19:49,517 --> 00:19:51,206
you can have
your phone back.
445
00:19:51,275 --> 00:19:53,517
I-- I'm feeling
I don't even
need my phone.
446
00:19:53,586 --> 00:19:57,448
[Grandma chuckles]You know, that was
a riveting tale.
447
00:19:57,517 --> 00:20:01,413
♪♪
448
00:20:01,482 --> 00:20:02,931
I love you, Grandma.
449
00:20:03,000 --> 00:20:06,448
Good night, bao bao.
I love you too.
450
00:20:11,448 --> 00:20:13,931
♪ What up, y'all?
It me, Shu Shu ♪
451
00:20:14,000 --> 00:20:16,275
♪ Here's a little bit
of old school for ya ♪
452
00:20:16,344 --> 00:20:18,275
♪ It goes a little
something like this ♪
453
00:20:18,344 --> 00:20:20,310
♪ I always try to be
the flyest chick on the block ♪
454
00:20:20,379 --> 00:20:22,344
♪ The best communist
with the cattle stock ♪
455
00:20:22,413 --> 00:20:24,620
♪ So that's when I had
this bright idea ♪
456
00:20:24,689 --> 00:20:26,689
♪ Hit the farm for a month,
no, the farm for a year ♪
457
00:20:26,758 --> 00:20:28,827
♪ The farm is lit
'cause the party's here ♪
458
00:20:28,896 --> 00:20:30,724
♪ Making it rain
like Chinese New Year ♪
459
00:20:30,793 --> 00:20:32,862
♪ Walking around
like "Who's that woman?" ♪
460
00:20:32,931 --> 00:20:34,793
♪ Everybody do it
like Shu Shu can ♪
461
00:20:34,862 --> 00:20:36,758
♪ First on the farm.
you know that's me ♪
462
00:20:36,827 --> 00:20:38,793
♪ But then a mudslide
like a freaking movie ♪
463
00:20:38,862 --> 00:20:40,827
♪ Wait, there are bugs now
biting my head ♪
464
00:20:40,896 --> 00:20:42,827
♪ Then I knew this ain't cool,
so this is what I said ♪
465
00:20:42,896 --> 00:20:45,103
♪ People, this is hella work ♪
466
00:20:45,172 --> 00:20:46,862
♪ Anyone got a plow? ♪
467
00:20:46,931 --> 00:20:48,793
♪ Shit, I really gotta leave ♪
468
00:20:48,862 --> 00:20:51,206
♪ What, huh, say it again ♪
469
00:20:51,275 --> 00:20:53,344
♪ Na na na na hey ♪
470
00:20:53,413 --> 00:20:55,517
♪ Na na na na oh ♪
471
00:20:55,586 --> 00:20:59,379
♪ Come on, here I go,
ha ha, I'm over this ♪
472
00:20:59,448 --> 00:21:01,551
♪ Na na na na ♪
473
00:21:01,620 --> 00:21:03,551
♪ Na na na na ♪
474
00:21:03,620 --> 00:21:05,689
♪♪
475
00:21:05,758 --> 00:21:07,517
♪ Na ♪♪
476
00:21:11,137 --> 00:21:14,103
♪♪
477
00:21:36,137 --> 00:21:38,068
[man]
Who the [bleep]
is Awkwafina?
33925
Can't find what you're looking for?
Get subtitles in any language from opensubtitles.com, and translate them here.