Original subtitles

Ah, hey, Ma Mac.

Hey. Check this out.

[chuckles] That is Wyatt, crying in his therapy session.

Look at those tears. That took me half the morning.

I'm not sure that a 16-year-old boy is gonna wanna see

- himself crying on his birthday cake. - He requested it.

He loves his therapist.

- You know your son, Matthew McConaughey? - I do.

Well, he might need a little therapy if what you told me yesterday is true.

What'd I tell you?

Wh… You implied that Matthew and I might be brothers.

Are you insane?

I was drunk.

Drunk people say a lot of silly things.

Plus I'm old.

Old people say silly things.

And I'm a woman and women say silly things.

It's just some silly thing that some old, drunk woman said to a stoned old guy.

Sounds like an opportunity for a lot of misunderstanding.

If you ain't gonna talk, I'ma find someone who will.

Find someone who will what, brother?

- [chuckles] Brother. - Good morning.

- [kisses] Mmm. - Ah. [chuckles]

Well, what's cookin',

- Mr. Governor McConaughey? [chuckles] - Hey, I like the sound of that.

Especially on my son's 16th birthday.

Which is also a big day to hand down an age-old father-son McConaughey ritual.

My 16th birthday, I went to pick up my dad at his favorite bar,

the Saddle Saloon in Lockhart.

And he was passed out under the pool table…

- Yeah? - …pants around his ankles,

bottle of Beam in one hand and a waitress in the other.

Different families, different traditions, brother.

- [chuckles] Yeah. - Hey, grab that cake, will you?

Yeah. Yeah.

[Matthew] Okay, everybody, cake and present time.

I wonder if the Saddle Saloon is still there.

[Wyatt] Uh…

Um…

The real gift is tomorrow morning,

when you and I embark on our first father-son deer hunt.

An age-old McConaughey rite of passage.

[chuckles]

- What a nice birthday gift. - [Matthew] Hey. Love you.

Introducing your son to murder.

McConaugheys are a huntin' breed, bud.

Always have been.

You know that killing an innocent animal is worse than killing a human?

Uh, what's your algebra there?

Well, a deer don't frack.

A itty-bitty baby fawn never organized a religion.

A 12-point buck never did an apartheid.

I've never been prouder.

- [Val] Okay, who wants more cake? - [Matthew vocalizes]

["Give a Little Bit" playing]

- So where are you-- - Just one second.

- [watch beeps] - Remind me to call Douglas.

- [watch beeps] - Remind me to call Frank, not Douglas.

- [watch beeping] - LOL. Send.

Well, first of all, I just wanna say I think

- you are the next governor of Texas. - That's good.

I would not have told my little brother

I couldn't drive him to rehab if I thought otherwise.

And secondly, I never wanna meet here again.

Are we in a barn?

Yeah. It's a quiet place for us to talk,

'cause we're having a birthday party for my son up at the house.

- It's his sweet 16. [chuckles] - Aw.

I don't need to see pictures.

Forgive me for not knowing too much about the whole election process.

This is my proverbial first rodeo, so to speak.

I love the folksy spirit of this.

Not personally. Personally, I find it repulsive,

but I think it's very good for the campaign. It's gold.

So we're about a month out from any sort of official announcement.

Right now, we're just setting the table.

'Cause once that announcement is out there,

buckle up chuckle-fucks, 'cause your life's about to change.

Okay. Well, before we get started, let me ask a baseline question.

Why should we hire you as my campaign manager, Ms. Hillcrest-Barnes-Davies?

[laughs]

You're not joking? Okay, I'm sorry.

I thought the way you said "Ms. Hillcrest-Barnes-Davies"

like I was your fourth grade teacher and you were a little boy…

I've won my last nine elections. I'm the one you go with if you wanna win.

And if you don't wanna win, I will take a selfie with you

and send it to my brother because he loves Superstellar

and I will see myself to the door.

- No, no, no, we want to win. - Yeah.

I think we are just all meeting each other.

Getting a feel for the situation.

I love you playing the role of this cool, level-headed spouse.

It really works for you.

I am gonna get you a stylist, though,

because the dress you're wearing, it's made of jeans.

And I'm gonna get you a good hairbrush as well.

Hey, Siri, remind me to get the wife a good hairbrush.

Gwen, my platform is my bloodline.

Okay? I know that.

Uh, my dad, Big Mac, he was about faith, family, tradition, Texas.

The way he built community and helped people help themselves

is something that I aspire to do more of as governor.

Wow. Okay.

We're going for the real Southern boy angle.

I love it. And I love your delivery.

- Well, that's the way I speak. - There's that Hollywood spunk.

- [phone buzzes] - Excuse me. Speaking of family.

This is Wyatt asking about what time

- do we leave for the hunt tomorrow. - Aw. [chuckles]

Matthew's taking our son on his first hunt.

He's a sensitive kid, but it's important to Matthew.

He used to go hunting with his father a lot.

Val, I'm gonna connect you with a good storytelling coach,

'cause my mind started to wander halfway through your first sentence.

Remind me to connect the wife to a storytelling coach.

Now, next steps.

A few exploratory meet and greets. Marketing meetings, stuff like that.

And mostly, I just want you to enjoy your last month of freedom

before I live inside you and I haunt you like a ghost in a castle.

Oh, and, um, if you have any skeletons in the closet whatsoever,

stuff you wanna get ahead of, please tell me now.

Illegitimate children, war crimes, cults, drugs,

people you're keeping in a basement. Pantyhose stuff, foot stuff,

riding around in cars with kids that aren't your kids.

Or even if they are your kids and you're going too fast.

Putting your penis out the window.

Pictures of your penis to people who want them, people who don't want them.

And I know it seems like I'm harping on stuff you could do with your penis,

but you'd be surprised.

Most of the stuff that I find is penis-flavored activities.

So let me know. I've seen it all.

There's nothing to worry about. McConaughey's past is squeaky clean.

So in the meantime, Val and I will discuss.

And thank you for being here.

We'll get back to you in due time.

[laughing] Okay.

Ha! You're gonna make me pee my pants.

I'm hired. I'll check in in a few days.

[quirky music playing]

What the fuck was that?

All I know is I raised you girls different.

Some might say better.

Raised? Think that you're using that term quite liberally.

Well, I…

I-I like to think that I set a good example for you girls.

Mostly of what not to do.

But at least I know no child of mine is gonna go hunting.

[inhales sharply] You know, if I wanted to go hunting, I would.

- Oh, really? - Yeah.

The girl who would daintily pick up spiders and carry them outside the house

is gonna murder an innocent fucking creature?

Un-fucking-likely.

[tense drumroll plays]

[upbeat music playing]

[object clattering]

[whispering] There's dew on the ground, as the sun rises.

Calling young Wyatt.

- [gasps] - Oh, sh…

- Okay, buddy. Big day. Let's hit it. - [panting]

[normal] Okay, I just gotta do five minutes in my daily journal

- and then I'm good to go. [sighs] - No, no, no. Do that in the truck.

Trust me, you're gonna have so much more to write about tonight.

- [laughs] Ah. - [groans] Ow.

[Matthew] So we've been over safety and muzzle management.

Now we just relax and look out for surprises.

[Olive] Hey.

[playful music playing]

I wanna go on the hunt.

Okay.

You wanna go on the father-son deer hunt with me and my son Wyatt?

Yes, sir.

Okay. Um… What would your dad say?

I think he'd say that I'm an adult who can make my own decisions.

- What do you think, Wyatt? - Uh, yeah, that's cool.

We can do the, uh, father-son-Olive trip.

Let's do it. Load up.

[Olive] Shotgun.

[yawns]

Surprise. [chuckles] I'm coming too.

All right. We got us a real, uh, full-house situation.

[whispering] You okay, dude?

[whispering] You know, I was just thinking, um,

you know how they say, like, when people die, like,

their lives flash before their eyes? Well…

Do you think that maybe the same thing happens with the deer?

Like they… I don't know, they see their mother and, like, their brothers and…

and all their favorite frolics?

Hey, man, you really don't have to do this whole hunting thing.

If this isn't you, that's okay.

I will shoot you in the leg. Make it look like an accident.

[peaceful music playing]

[Matthew] You know, out here, Mother Nature is the great equalizer.

Time stands still, memory catches up to you.

And suddenly everything in your past and the path you took to get here

becomes perfectly clear.

You know, some people say you can't go back, but I say you can.

Just gotta look in the right place.

Wait, isn't that from your Lincoln commercial?

Most of it.

- [mosquito buzzes] - [Kai groans]

[country song playing on speakers]

Howdy.

Well, fuck me in the ass sideways. You're Woody Harrelson.

- [chuckles] Yeah. How you doin'? - [bartender] So what brings you here?

You know, I drank my first beer sittin' right over there when I was ten years old.

I threw up on that pool table.

It was actually later the same day.

- [bartender] Hmm. - I'm on a bit of a fact-finding mission.

I know it's a long shot but, uh…

I was just wondering if any of these old-timers

might remember my dad, Clive Harrelson,

hanging out here in the late '60s with a lady friend,

foul mouth, uh, scary eyes,

you could imagine her becoming a lovable sociopath later in life.

Any of you fellas know Clive Harrelson?

[patrons murmuring]

Anybody?

Hey, listen, I'll leave the, uh… the… the wifey's number here for ya,

and, uh, if you hear anything, just let me know, yeah?

Thank you.

Nice pen. Can you… Mind if I…

No. Leave it.

Oh, yeah. Okay.

It's hard to find a nice pen like that.

[intriguing folk music playing]

[line ringing]

Hey. You're never gonna guess who showed up here.

So are you having a nice hunt?

- Mosquitoes, guns and sap. - [chuckles]

What's not to love?

How are you? How's your hunt?

You feel like you're sticking it to Dad?

Uh, yeah.

If he ever crawled out of his own asshole long enough to notice what I'm doing.

Yeah. He didn't handle your breakup great, did he?

You mean when he army crawled into the ocean 'cause he saw women crying?

I think maybe the thing about Dad is that he has terrible instincts

and his feelings are so big that he just can't handle them.

But you can't really say that he doesn't love us.

Like, he loves us.

Like, it's kind of scary how much he loves us.

So, maybe just throw him a bone.

Hmm. Maybe.

[Matthew] Girls! [whistles] Move it!

- All right, let's go. Okay. - Yeah. Okay.

I'm starving.

Anybody notice I was gone?

Nope, but I noticed you're back.

Yeah, yeah, I, uh…

I had to do some errands.

Picked up some stuff at a store that sells, uh…

stuff.

You know you left your dishes in the sink?

I figured you got someone who takes care of that, right?

We do. It's me.

Well, thank you rightly.

So nice out here.

[Val] Mm-hmm.

It's so quiet and…

Wh… [sighs] Why is it so quiet? Where is everybody?

Matthew and Wyatt went on a hunt, and I think Kai and Olive went with them.

- On the hunt? - Yeah.

[screams]

We don't know what you're saying.

[gentle, suspenseful music playing]

It's like watching a mime who hates himself.

[whispering] See right down the creek bed? He's waitin' on us.

Quiet now.

I don't wanna put too much pressure on you, but…

I got my first buck on my very first hunt on my very first shot.

The fact is, for eight generations of McConaugheys,

they all got their first buck on their first hunt on their very first shot.

If you don't, I just wanna let you know you'll be the first.

- No pressure. - [hawk squawks]

Now listen to the sound of the cardinals, the blue jays…

- And the… - [hawk squawks]

…red-tailed hawk up there.

That's your soundtrack.

An invitation to send that deer to heaven.

You think that deer really go to heaven?

Uh-huh. If they believe in Jesus, they do.

Stock to shoulder, scope to the eye.

[Olive] Oh, my God, I can't look.

Squeeze.

Squeeze. Come on.

No!

- Uncle Woody! - [Woody] Stop!

- [normal] What the hell? - [Woody] Go!

Run free, take nothing for granted!

What is your major malfunction, man?

- You almost got yourself killed. - Better me than the deer.

Oh, really? You dumbass.

What are you doing mad at me, man?

- I'm mad at you, motherfucker! - For what?

For kidnapping my daughters and making them accessories to murder!

[Matthew] Hunt's over. I'm calling it.

Kai, Wyatt, go with Olive. Y'all take the truck, head on home.

You and me, we got some talking to do.

Oh, yeah. I got some talking

- to do with you, motherfucker. - [Matthew] Come on.

What kind of sicko lures my children into a cannibalistic ritual?

Man, you got some serious issues.

No, the issue is that you came this close to gettin' yourself killed, man!

Not to mention that you sabotaged

a once-in-a-lifetime bonding experience between me and my son!

What about my girls?

This is one of the few things I've passed on to my kids.

That I have never harmed an innocent creature.

And I would wager that even in the eyes of God, it is an unforgivable sin

- to take the life of an animal-- - [deer bleats]

[brakes squeal]

Huh.

And you were saying?

[playful music playing]

[exhales sharply]

[Ma Mac] Whoo-hoo!

Fresh meat!

I didn't do that, did I?

Did I, like, suppress a memory or something?

It was me, Wyatt.

- What happened? - I don't know.

He just came out of nowhere…

Ugh.

And now I got blood on my hands, and I'll never be clean.

Okay. Um…

Uh, do you wanna breathe? Or maybe do some screaming?

I'll call my guru, Gary.

This is bigger than Gary.

My sweet boy.

I knew today wasn't for you.

My birthday wish is that he wakes up.

He's gonna be okay, right?

Uh… [stammers] Yeah. Yeah.

Bit of a sensitive group, huh?

Yep, yep, yep, yep, yep.

I may have misread everyone's appetite for this whole ordeal.

I think I might have to recalibrate. Um…

Hey, everybody, we got a meeting at the fire pit in 20 minutes.

Attendance mandatory.

[Woody sighs] Goddamn it.

[knocks on door]

Yeah, Joy, can you give me a minute, please?

Jo… [breathes heavily]

Olive?

Listen, just… just take it easy on me, will you?

That… That deer made eye contact with me right at the point of impact,

and what-whatever you're thinking to say to me,

just know that I am fragile.

I just feel like this is all my fault.

If I didn't go on the hunt, you would've never killed that deer and…

It's not your fault.

And you have many legitimate reasons to be pissed at me.

But for what it's worth, I'm glad that you don't kill spiders.

[chuckles]

I know.

[tender music plays]

And I guess I'm really glad that in our family, we don't hunt.

[chuckles] So…

guess you could say…

you're glad I raised you that way?

Again, I take exception to "raised," but…

yeah, sure.

If it stops you from crying.

[chuckles]

[Olive] Stop crying.

I'm not crying.

- Oh, yeah? - No, I'm just…

- The pollen is insane today. - [chuckles]

[Matthew] Well, folks, um, I think it's fair to say

that today has not gone as I planned it to go.

I really thought that right about now,

me and Wyatt would be celebrating his first hunt, his first kill.

Handing a bloody deer heart back and forth,

seeing who could get the biggest bite.

Salivating over that son of a bitch, getting bloody. You know?

But, um…

that seems to be a bit tone-deaf of an idea right now.

Um…

Reminds me of a book in the Bible, Ecclesiastes, um,

about there being a time for everything.

Well, there's a time to eat a deer heart

and there's a time not to eat a deer heart.

[softly] Yeah.

So with that I'd like to say, thank you, deer.

You were a good deer.

- [Kai] Don't touch it. - My son, Wyatt, is not going to

take a bite of your heart today.

But I am going to make a toilet paper holder out of your antlers

- that is going to go in the powder room. - [Val] Mm-mmm.

But we're gonna do that in private, me and him.

With that, I say amen.

- Amen. - [Val] Amen.

Now to the man who is responsible for killing this animal today.

Accidentally. One hundred percent accidentally.

I was there.

Woody? Like to say a few words?

[Ma Mac] That was beautiful.

I didn't know this deer's story.

But in his silence, I see my own.

- What in the hell is he talking about? - [shushes]

The weight…

[tender music playing]

…of untold truths.

The search for belonging.

Quiet ache of things left unsaid.

And so that is why this day feels heavier than just the loss of life.

Because sometimes

the hardest part is carrying what we don't understand.

I honor you.

I know you would've been a dear friend, deer friend.

[chuckles]

[Matthew shushes]

Oh, I'm sorry. I thought it was a joke.

[gentle music playing]

- [Joy] Oh. [clears throat] - [Kai] Oh. Okay.

His eye's still moist.

[Olive gasps]

Good night, sweet prince.

- Can I kiss the dead deer? - No.

I'm gonna try each and every day to live a good life,

to be a honest American and a truthful Texan,

- just like you. - [Joy] Hey, Wood?

There's some guy calling for you, named Creaky Joe

from a bar called the Saddle Saloon?

Oh, yeah, Creaky Leaky Joe. Great guy.

Yeah, he's helping me research a role.

Hey, uh, see you on the other side, amigo.

[Joy] Please stop giving out my number to strangers.

Hmm. Hello?

Anybody home?

Creaky Joe?

- [glass shatters] - [groans] Oh.

[high-pitched ringing]

Wakey-wakey, motherfucker.

[Woody stammers]

[tense music playing]

Guys, I think there's been some kind of misunderstanding here.

Can you get that instrument of war out of my face?

I've had enough guns for one day.

Don't think so.

Who are you guys?

We are the Travis Brothers.

Am I meant to know who that is?

Motherfucker, we shot a man in Corpus Christi for smil… [coughing]

Hey, hey, hey.

Don't tell people about our killing.

Look, your daddy owed us a big pot of money.

And then he skipped town.

And now it's our turn to collect.

If by "skipped town" you mean indefinitely incarcerated,

I could see this debt continuing for some time, hey.

Oh! Okay.

Okay, I'll pay you.

Don't mess with my moneymaker.

Where's the money?

I don't just carry money around with me.

I mean, I'm an actor.

[stammers] I'll have my business manager wire it to you.

- How much is it? - $1,800.

You knocked me on the head and waved the pistola in my face over $1,800?

You're goddamn right we do… [coughing]

Hey! Stop trying to yell.

You ain't got the saliva for it.

That was in 1972.

With interest compounded,

you owe us $191,000.

Guys… [chuckles] …I don't have that kind of money sittin' around.

I live in a bus.

My wife knits my socks.

I saw your house in Malibu.

Architectural Digest.

If it's any consolation, it's a real money pit.

I'm gonna tell you what we're gonna do.

You've got the Houston phone book on your chest.

We're gonna shoot ya.

Bullet's gonna stop somewhere around M, God willing.

And if you don't pay us, we're gonna strap Beaumont to your chest.

'Cause Beaumont ain't as big as Houston.

That's implicit in what I was sayin', motherfucker!

Well, maybe it wasn't clear.

Maybe he's never been to Beaumont.

You been to Beaumont?

Listen, guys.

I-I don't have the money to pay you.

I don't have a means to pay you.

What about your computer?

Yeah, your phone. One of those cash apps.

If you let me go, I promise to come back here and pay you.

Fuck this bitch.

Go get Beaumont.

Don't get Beaumont!

[gunshot]

You two pencil-dicked Travis assholes,

you best untie that boy right quick.

Before I finish the job diabetes started on ya.

- You heard her. - [TJ mutters]

[stammers] All right, don't get hasty.

We're doin' it, Ma Mac.

Oh. Very odd you call her Ma Mac too.

- [groans] Holy shit, I've been shot! - Jesus Christ.

[stammers] I didn't think the thing was loaded!

You're in no condition to carry live ammo.

Don't tell me what to do in front of our goddamn victim!

Oh, my God. They were right.

It stopped at the M.

Told ya.

[playful music playing]

Ma Mac, thank you so much.

You just saved my bacon. [stammers]

How'd you know I was here?

'Cause I heard your wife take the call, you moron.

Now listen to me. I told you there is nothing for you to be bothered about.

But you just can't leave well enough alone, can you?

And now you done kicked over a hornet's nest.

You only get one of those, motherfucker.

[engine starts, revs]

["Kick It Out" playing]