Original subtitles

And.

that concludes my interpretive dance piece asking if you

want to watch baby sea turtles hatch tonight at sunset.

Whoa, who could pass that up?

I'm in.

If we're going to be at the beach, that means we can go camping.

You know what goes with camping and beaches?

B-b-b-bonfires!

Sea Turtles MTV Bonfire Party!

Where do we turn off next, Eileen?

Hold on, let me check the directions.

Trail mix?

Oh no, this is my recreation bag!

I left the directions in my school bag by mistake.

Wah-wah!

Remember, Eileen, if we get lost, moss always grows on the south side of the tree.

North side.

No worries, I know exactly where I left the directions.

Hey Margaret, are you at home now?

Oh great, you see that bag on the counter?

It has directions to Sunset Cove in it.

Can you read them to me?

Uh-huh.

No, we already passed that.

Slight right on left-hand road, or... Gah!

This is taking forever!

Just put her on speaker.

Did you get that, Eileen?

Eileen?

Eileen, are you there?

Uh, yeah.

Yeah, I got it.

Oh, good.

If you get lost, just remember, moss always grows on the south side of the tree.

North side.

That's hilarious!

CJ just said the same thing!

Wait, am I on speaker?

I see the turn.

No more directions.

Bye!

Welcome to Utopia!

Uh, thanks?

Can we go through?

Your membership cards, please.

Oh, no, we're not members.

We just want to go down to the beach and... Non-members!

Who's a non-member, Stan?

Is it these guys?

This is a private spa!

Get out of here, non-members!

We just want to have a beach bonfire sea turtle hatching party!

Ah, these simple non-members are kind of cute when they're mad.

Come on.

Let's park somewhere further down and hike to the beach.

Did you hear him say all that stuff?

Here!

Are you feeling?

Turtles for generations have been laying their eggs in this sand.

No!

These tents are pretty cool when they're not all smashed to bits.

I know, right?

Well, I think it's about time we got our snack on.

I think Eileen's got snacks in the cooler.

Nice!

Remember, only dry wood, Rigby.

Dry shmai, big diff.

What's got you down?

We're doing your turtle thing!

Woo!

It's just... I wish Margaret could be here.

Why didn't you invite her?

Oh, yeah, the whole Christmas kiss thing with Mordecai.

I get why CJ doesn't like Margaret, but Margaret's my friend.

I don't know.

I just wish we could all be friends.

We got wood!

It's almost time for the turtles to hatch.

We've got to find their nest!

You guys go look for it.

Me and Mordecai will get some more firewood.

Come on, Mordecai.

Let's go.

But we just got some.

So it's like...

I don't want to put Eileen in this position, but I

just can't stand to be around Margaret right now.

Yeah... But it doesn't change the fact that Margaret and Eileen are still friends.

She just needs to know that you're okay with their friendship.

Yeah... I mean...

I know this trip is important to her and everything, but I can't help what you did.

Uh... Well... Hey, look!

Hey, what's that light up ahead?

What are they doing with those turtles?

Here at Youth-Tobia, we've dedicated ourselves to discovering the Fountain of Youth.

How have we accomplished this?

Simple.

Sea turtles.

There's science-y stuff in turtles that makes you look younger.

Just ask this doctor.

Huh?

But enough of that, Egghead.

Let's see what this 90-year-old man has to say about this.

Wow.

That's really messed up.

You going to the beach for the turtle hatching tonight?

You know it, man.

Gonna get me a fresh new turtle.

The younger, the better.

Yeah, mine's getting old.

Ew!

Eileen's turtles!

Come on.

We gotta warn her.

Turtles!

Fresh out of the eggs!

Not members!

Ah!

You guys are sick!

Yeah.

We're gonna call the cops.

They're already here.

They've got lifetime memberships.

Ain't that right, officers?

Looks like we got some troublemakers here, Glenn.

Yeah, real turtle huggers, Hank.

Time to take them to their shell.

Their prison shell!

See what I did there?

Ah!

Sit tight, non-members.

Now let's go get some fresh baby turtles so we won't look old anymore!

Turtles!

Turtles!

Turtles!

I'm not seeing any turtles, Eileen.

Are you sure this is the spot?

Give them a minute.

They're shy, misunderstood creatures.

Like me.

It's almost sundown.

We're Mordecai and CJ.

They're gonna miss it.

We've gotta get out of here before those creeps get to the turtles!

Quick, call Eileen!

Come on, Eileen.

Come on, Eileen.

Huh?

Oh!

Forgot!

I took her phone from earlier.

Well, the cops are no good.

We gotta call somebody for help.

I can't believe I'm doing this.

It's moving!

It's moving!

They're hatching!

Right on time!

Thanks for making our job easier.

Gage them and cage them, Glenn!

But you're officers of the law.

Why are you doing this?

Because without these turtles, my face would look

like a ball of raisins in an old leather jacket.

Look!

In the sand!

No turtle can resist a cage.

No little ones!

It's a trap!

Don't go in!

Let us persuade them, Glenn!

See what I did there?

No!

Let those turtles go!

Sand boning!

Get to the turtles!

I got my rights!

Don't worry.

You'll understand when you're older.

Hey!

Could it be?

Chopper 6 right on time!

Robert's dad?

Are we late for the beach bonfire turtle hatching party?

Unique New York!

Unique New York!

Okay, I'm good, Murray.

Let's roll it.

We're here at lovely Sunset Cove, where a

scene that's anything but lovely is happening.

Utopia Thaw is allegedly using baby sea turtles for anti-aging purposes.

Utopia employees, do you care to comment on this?

And you, you're officers of the law.

What do you have to say for yourselves?

Well... There you have it, folks.

The use of baby sea turtles may make you less gross on the

outside, but it's sure to reveal how gross you are on the inside.

Baby sea turtles, listen to me.

You don't have to make old people look young.

You can live!

You have a choice!

Go, little ones!

Be free!

Go, little ones!

What is that?

I think those are Eileen's turtles.

Fresh turtles!

Straight from the egg!

Huh?

Just keep breathing!

Keep breathing!

Cancel my membership!

Come on!

Let's get out of here!

Hey, Hank!

Is that our closer?

Come on!

Let's bail!

Let's see if these pigs can fly!

Huh?

Do you see what I did there?

Oh,

turtles are awesome!

Eileen, are you okay?

I'm fine.

But how did you know we were in trouble?

CJ called and told me the whole story.

Wait, CJ called you?

On the phone?

On your phone, actually.

CJ!

Somebody had to save those turtles.

We couldn't call the cops, so the news was the next best thing.

And it just so happens we know a newswoman.

Besides, I figured you'd wanted all of your friends here for this.

Oh, you guys!

Uh, Eileen?

Just a little longer.