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1
00:00:00,934 --> 00:00:02,536
I'm gonna miss you so much,
2
00:00:02,570 --> 00:00:04,648
but we can speak on the computer
so you'll see my face.
3
00:00:04,672 --> 00:00:06,707
But we won't be able
to touch you.
4
00:00:06,740 --> 00:00:08,209
Hey, look. You'll still have me.
5
00:00:08,242 --> 00:00:11,179
- Just you?
- Yes. Just... Your father. Hi.
6
00:00:35,035 --> 00:00:37,037
Hello there. I'm Dr. Mecklebaum.
7
00:00:37,071 --> 00:00:39,240
- I'm Dave Burd. How are you?
- Good. Good to see you.
8
00:00:39,273 --> 00:00:41,742
So, uh...
what brings you in today?
9
00:00:41,775 --> 00:00:43,411
So, a few days ago
I was shaving,
10
00:00:43,444 --> 00:00:45,513
and I noticed these red bumps
on my pubiscus,
11
00:00:45,546 --> 00:00:47,615
- and I just wanted...
- P-Pubiscus?
12
00:00:47,648 --> 00:00:49,917
That's probably
not the medical term for it.
13
00:00:49,950 --> 00:00:51,719
Uh, like, where
your pubic hair would be
14
00:00:51,752 --> 00:00:53,687
if you didn't shave it
all the way.
15
00:00:53,721 --> 00:00:54,898
- Oh. Oh, copy that. All right.
- Yeah. Yeah.
16
00:00:54,922 --> 00:00:56,424
So, well, let's take a look.
17
00:00:56,457 --> 00:00:59,093
Yes, and I know this
is gonna sound so absurd,
18
00:00:59,127 --> 00:01:00,961
but before I can just
show you my penis,
19
00:01:00,994 --> 00:01:02,430
I do have to kind of explain
20
00:01:02,463 --> 00:01:04,798
- a few things about it to you.
- Okay.
21
00:01:04,832 --> 00:01:08,236
I just have, like,
a very bizarre situation down...
22
00:01:08,269 --> 00:01:10,471
Okay, when I was born,
23
00:01:10,504 --> 00:01:12,149
I came out of the womb
with a tangled urethra,
24
00:01:12,173 --> 00:01:13,741
so immediately they had to go in
25
00:01:13,774 --> 00:01:15,319
- and do all types of surgery to it.
- Mm-hmm.
26
00:01:15,343 --> 00:01:17,053
As a result, there's so much
scarring down there.
27
00:01:17,077 --> 00:01:18,479
- Sure.
- And then, I mean,
28
00:01:18,512 --> 00:01:19,956
you know how the skin
on your testicles
29
00:01:19,980 --> 00:01:22,092
is a different type of skin
than the skin on your penis?
30
00:01:22,116 --> 00:01:25,286
It's more...
chicken-skinned or ribbed.
31
00:01:25,319 --> 00:01:26,887
Yeah?
32
00:01:26,920 --> 00:01:28,622
So my dick skin
is actually made of
33
00:01:28,656 --> 00:01:30,624
that exact same style
of ribbing.
34
00:01:30,658 --> 00:01:32,626
All the way up my shaft... ribs.
35
00:01:32,660 --> 00:01:34,762
So my theory is:
When they had to replace
36
00:01:34,795 --> 00:01:36,164
the hacked-off dick skin,
37
00:01:36,197 --> 00:01:38,599
they used my testicle skin
to replace it.
38
00:01:38,632 --> 00:01:40,934
Which would mean that my dick
39
00:01:40,968 --> 00:01:43,304
is made of balls.
40
00:01:43,337 --> 00:01:46,907
I couldn't be more precious
about this information.
41
00:01:46,940 --> 00:01:48,852
My own girlfriend doesn't know
anything about this
42
00:01:48,876 --> 00:01:50,987
because I'm so good at
controlling the lighting and...
43
00:01:51,011 --> 00:01:52,251
Well, if-if you're comfortable,
44
00:01:52,280 --> 00:01:54,182
I'm-I'm more than happy
to take a look.
45
00:01:54,215 --> 00:01:55,925
I just had to explain all that,
'cause I didn't want you
46
00:01:55,949 --> 00:01:57,385
to look at it and be like...
47
00:01:58,486 --> 00:01:59,596
- You know? Yeah.
- Yeah. Sure.
48
00:01:59,620 --> 00:02:00,754
- Okay.
- Okay.
49
00:02:00,788 --> 00:02:01,989
Okay.
50
00:02:04,024 --> 00:02:06,260
Yeah.
51
00:02:06,294 --> 00:02:08,662
Those look like
razor bumps to me.
52
00:02:08,696 --> 00:02:12,166
Okay. I mean, but can't genital
herpes look like razor bumps?
53
00:02:12,200 --> 00:02:13,801
Who's to say
that it's razor bumps?
54
00:02:13,834 --> 00:02:15,836
I'm to say. It's my job.
55
00:02:15,869 --> 00:02:18,339
Well, you should know
there's a very big disconnect
56
00:02:18,372 --> 00:02:20,107
between the online
medical community
57
00:02:20,140 --> 00:02:21,351
and the brick-and-mortar
establishments,
58
00:02:21,375 --> 00:02:22,343
- like...
- Brick-and-mortar?
59
00:02:22,376 --> 00:02:23,844
You mean... doctors.
60
00:02:23,877 --> 00:02:25,121
While I have you here,
real quick,
61
00:02:25,145 --> 00:02:27,348
I know this is a totally
different field of medicine.
62
00:02:27,381 --> 00:02:29,883
I have all this acne on my back
that came out of nowhere...
63
00:02:29,917 --> 00:02:31,018
- Yeah, not me.
- Cystic.
64
00:02:31,051 --> 00:02:32,386
Yeah, not it. No, it's not me.
65
00:02:32,420 --> 00:02:35,489
I just figured you must know
more than, like, the common man.
66
00:02:35,523 --> 00:02:36,723
I could refer you to somebody.
67
00:02:38,759 --> 00:02:39,993
- Not my field.
- Thank you.
68
00:02:40,027 --> 00:02:42,129
- You're welcome, Dave.
- Hey, where do I pay?
69
00:02:53,241 --> 00:02:54,742
Oh.
70
00:02:55,843 --> 00:02:56,844
Is this the right room?
71
00:02:56,877 --> 00:02:58,312
Uh, is this Studio A?
72
00:02:58,346 --> 00:03:00,180
The fuck is that smell, man?
73
00:03:00,214 --> 00:03:03,150
Oh, man, this dude
always coming in here
74
00:03:03,183 --> 00:03:05,028
- with this tuna fish shit.
- Okay, are we leaving?
75
00:03:05,052 --> 00:03:06,720
I'm gonna be right back.
76
00:03:06,754 --> 00:03:09,590
Why the fuck would you just walk
into a session like that?
77
00:03:09,623 --> 00:03:11,268
You said "come anytime,"
those were your words.
78
00:03:11,292 --> 00:03:13,036
Yeah, come by, kick it
in the lounge and, like,
79
00:03:13,060 --> 00:03:15,429
I don't know, meet people, talk
to people, make connections.
80
00:03:15,463 --> 00:03:17,398
Don't come into a fucking
studio session
81
00:03:17,431 --> 00:03:20,000
with tuna fish. It smells crazy.
82
00:03:20,033 --> 00:03:21,911
Well, forgive me for not knowing
this incredibly specific rule.
83
00:03:21,935 --> 00:03:23,437
- That's...
- Is that YG? Oh, my God.
84
00:03:23,471 --> 00:03:24,614
They're... Yep, that's YG.
They're coming. Wow.
85
00:03:24,638 --> 00:03:25,682
Whup their ass when you see 'em,
86
00:03:25,706 --> 00:03:26,940
straight like that.
87
00:03:26,974 --> 00:03:28,175
- Yeah.
- What's up?
88
00:03:28,208 --> 00:03:30,511
Studio smell like tuna, man.
This shit stank.
89
00:03:30,544 --> 00:03:31,612
Fuck going on?
90
00:03:33,447 --> 00:03:34,558
That's a scary group of men.
91
00:03:34,582 --> 00:03:36,417
He had tattoos
on the creases of his neck.
92
00:03:36,450 --> 00:03:39,019
I'm so scared. I don't know
if I'm supposed to speak
93
00:03:39,052 --> 00:03:40,754
or not speak
when I'm spoken to or...
94
00:03:40,788 --> 00:03:42,766
Doesn't sound like a very
collaborative setting to me.
95
00:03:42,790 --> 00:03:45,926
- Not at all.
- Is there any window for you to show them my video?
96
00:03:45,959 --> 00:03:49,563
No. These gang members obviously
do not like dick jokes.
97
00:03:49,597 --> 00:03:51,441
Know your audience, my dude.
I love you like a sister.
98
00:03:51,465 --> 00:03:52,466
I have to leave.
99
00:03:54,167 --> 00:03:55,936
- Text me.
- Nope.
100
00:04:11,118 --> 00:04:12,085
Hold up.
101
00:04:12,119 --> 00:04:13,220
Hold the fuck up.
102
00:04:13,253 --> 00:04:14,264
Ain't you the YouTube rapper
103
00:04:14,288 --> 00:04:15,299
with the small dick
and all that?
104
00:04:15,323 --> 00:04:17,391
- I've seen that video.
- Did you like it?
105
00:04:17,425 --> 00:04:18,826
Yeah, that shit go hard.
106
00:04:18,859 --> 00:04:21,962
You have no idea how happy
this makes me.
107
00:04:21,995 --> 00:04:23,431
Like, I live my entire life
108
00:04:23,464 --> 00:04:26,900
trying to impress people
of your... pedigree.
109
00:04:26,934 --> 00:04:28,902
- I'm Dave.
- Ha, Dave, you a fool.
110
00:04:28,936 --> 00:04:30,404
I'm Gata, like alligator.
111
00:04:30,438 --> 00:04:31,772
I just rolled this chopstick.
112
00:04:31,805 --> 00:04:33,240
You trying to smoke some weed?
113
00:04:33,273 --> 00:04:35,509
Smoke weed?
Uh, do I want to smoke wee...?
114
00:04:35,543 --> 00:04:37,277
I don't think...
No, no, thank you.
115
00:04:37,311 --> 00:04:39,179
So you a rapper,
and you don't blow bud?
116
00:04:39,212 --> 00:04:40,481
I didn't say that, I smoke.
117
00:04:40,514 --> 00:04:42,650
I treat it like a glass of wine
at the end of the day.
118
00:04:42,683 --> 00:04:45,185
If I smoked this early, I'd feel
like a total waste of life.
119
00:04:46,720 --> 00:04:49,122
But did you see that YG's here?
120
00:04:49,156 --> 00:04:50,358
Yeah, why you think I'm here?
121
00:04:50,391 --> 00:04:52,159
My nigga Bino sell him tree
all the time.
122
00:04:52,192 --> 00:04:54,528
How would I go about
getting a rapper like YG
123
00:04:54,562 --> 00:04:56,430
on one of my songs?
Because I feel like,
124
00:04:56,464 --> 00:04:58,666
until I do that, no one's
gonna take me seriously.
125
00:04:58,699 --> 00:05:00,444
Everyone's just gonna think
I'm a YouTube rapper.
126
00:05:00,468 --> 00:05:02,670
Shit. It's all about the gander.
127
00:05:02,703 --> 00:05:03,704
The gander?
128
00:05:03,737 --> 00:05:05,506
The gander, nigga.
You got to wiggle,
129
00:05:05,539 --> 00:05:08,108
set yourself up, make a play.
Right now you're in the studio,
130
00:05:08,141 --> 00:05:10,277
all these rappers
in here popping,
131
00:05:10,310 --> 00:05:12,145
and you talking about,
"Hi, my name is Dave."
132
00:05:12,179 --> 00:05:13,857
Like, what the hell?
Like, you should be, like,
133
00:05:13,881 --> 00:05:17,017
"What's up? It's Lil Dicky."
Like, own that shit, bro.
134
00:05:17,050 --> 00:05:18,495
I do think it's gonna be
the biggest name
135
00:05:18,519 --> 00:05:20,287
in hip-hop, honestly. Lil Dicky.
136
00:05:20,320 --> 00:05:21,522
Ride your own dick, man.
137
00:05:21,555 --> 00:05:23,857
Can we get some food? YG hungry.
138
00:05:23,891 --> 00:05:25,959
Oh. I don't know why
you're asking me.
139
00:05:25,993 --> 00:05:27,160
I don't work here.
140
00:05:27,194 --> 00:05:29,663
I, uh... I'm Lil Dicky.
141
00:05:29,697 --> 00:05:31,198
- Lil Dicky?
- Yes.
142
00:05:31,231 --> 00:05:33,300
Can we get some food? YG hungry.
143
00:05:33,333 --> 00:05:35,335
Okay. You know,
I respect you, I just think
144
00:05:35,369 --> 00:05:37,381
- you're going about it all kind of wrong.
- Hey-hey-hey, chill-chill-chill.
145
00:05:37,405 --> 00:05:38,982
Hey, bro, there's a store
right around the corner;
146
00:05:39,006 --> 00:05:40,374
We gonna bend the block
real fast
147
00:05:40,408 --> 00:05:41,509
and get whatever you need.
148
00:05:41,542 --> 00:05:42,710
Come on, man.
149
00:05:42,743 --> 00:05:43,877
He look hot.
150
00:05:43,911 --> 00:05:45,355
I hope these are
the right snacks, Gata.
151
00:05:45,379 --> 00:05:46,814
Man, if you don't stop tripping,
152
00:05:46,847 --> 00:05:48,492
I'm a real nigga. If I tell you
there's cheese on the moon,
153
00:05:48,516 --> 00:05:49,683
bring your crackers, man.
154
00:05:49,717 --> 00:05:51,661
You Gucci. You're gonna
go in there, show your face,
155
00:05:51,685 --> 00:05:52,986
apply the gander, wiggle up.
156
00:05:53,020 --> 00:05:56,490
How can this possibly
get me closer to a YG verse?
157
00:05:56,524 --> 00:05:58,435
Check this out. I used to be
in Miami all the time,
158
00:05:58,459 --> 00:06:00,661
- at the Hit Factory. It's a studio.
- Yeah?
159
00:06:00,694 --> 00:06:02,271
I'm in there with my boys.
We chilling with some dudes
160
00:06:02,295 --> 00:06:04,732
from New Orleans. You know
how they dress already, right?
161
00:06:04,765 --> 00:06:07,034
- No.
- Big T-shirts, baggy jeans.
162
00:06:07,067 --> 00:06:09,437
We're in they studio session
and Wayne walk in, bro.
163
00:06:09,470 --> 00:06:11,204
- I'm in there dripping.
- Lil Wayne?
164
00:06:11,238 --> 00:06:12,873
Weezy! What other Wayne
you know?
165
00:06:12,906 --> 00:06:14,875
- Brady.
- I'm in there sauced down, though.
166
00:06:14,908 --> 00:06:17,911
- Gretzky.
- Skinny jeans, Cali swag, all that... lip ring.
167
00:06:17,945 --> 00:06:20,380
And they on my swag, bro.
Wayne like, "What you do?"
168
00:06:20,414 --> 00:06:22,783
And I end up getting three songs
off the drip alone.
169
00:06:22,816 --> 00:06:24,518
You have three songs
with Lil Wayne?
170
00:06:24,552 --> 00:06:26,186
Yes, that's what I'm trying
to tell you.
171
00:06:26,219 --> 00:06:27,431
They're on my laptop;
They ain't never came out,
172
00:06:27,455 --> 00:06:28,856
but you know how that go.
173
00:06:28,889 --> 00:06:31,234
This is very useful information.
If I would've known all this,
174
00:06:31,258 --> 00:06:33,894
I would've certainly
dressed differently today.
175
00:06:33,927 --> 00:06:36,464
The swag ain't on you,
it's in you.
176
00:06:36,497 --> 00:06:38,566
Like, what is that, peach?
177
00:06:38,599 --> 00:06:39,876
They gonna fuck with that,
that's hard body.
178
00:06:39,900 --> 00:06:42,235
You got a lot of heart
for wearing that color.
179
00:06:42,269 --> 00:06:43,804
Well... great.
180
00:06:43,837 --> 00:06:45,248
Do I just knock or what?
What do you think?
181
00:06:45,272 --> 00:06:46,807
Yeah, just knock in
on that shit, man.
182
00:06:47,975 --> 00:06:50,811
I feel like they're not
ever gonna...
183
00:06:52,613 --> 00:06:54,715
Why are you wearing
your sunglasses inside?
184
00:06:54,748 --> 00:06:56,249
Bro, you know I got
to drip, bro.
185
00:06:56,283 --> 00:06:57,561
- We're going to the studio right now.
- Should I just...?
186
00:06:57,585 --> 00:06:58,962
YG, you're about
to get a verse, okay?
187
00:06:58,986 --> 00:07:00,954
- Should I walk in?
- Man, go in there, man.
188
00:07:02,155 --> 00:07:03,390
Snack time. I...
189
00:07:03,423 --> 00:07:04,658
Okay.
190
00:07:04,692 --> 00:07:06,093
You're welcome.
191
00:07:06,126 --> 00:07:08,962
I feel like that did nothing
for my career.
192
00:07:08,996 --> 00:07:11,164
Bro, "snack time"?
Did you really just say
193
00:07:11,198 --> 00:07:13,233
that corny-ass shit, bro?
What the fuck?
194
00:07:13,266 --> 00:07:14,434
Give me your phone, man.
195
00:07:14,468 --> 00:07:15,769
My phone? Why?
196
00:07:15,803 --> 00:07:18,572
Listen, if you want to get
that verse from YG, bro,
197
00:07:18,606 --> 00:07:20,574
you're gonna have to holler
at Nutti, man.
198
00:07:20,608 --> 00:07:22,409
- Who is Nutti?
- Nutti.
199
00:07:22,442 --> 00:07:24,111
That's YG manager.
I'm the plug, bro.
200
00:07:24,144 --> 00:07:26,790
- I'm putting his number in your phone.
- This couldn't be more helpful.
201
00:07:26,814 --> 00:07:28,758
So, what do I do? I text him
and say, "Hi, it's Lil Dicky..."
202
00:07:28,782 --> 00:07:30,259
Yeah, he probably gonna want
some money or something
203
00:07:30,283 --> 00:07:31,585
- for the verse.
- Money? Okay.
204
00:07:31,619 --> 00:07:32,696
Well, I'll figure that out.
205
00:07:32,720 --> 00:07:33,987
You have to bring that bag.
206
00:07:34,021 --> 00:07:36,023
I just saved mine, too, bro.
We got to get up, man.
207
00:07:36,056 --> 00:07:37,190
Huh.
208
00:07:37,224 --> 00:07:39,168
Let me get you on my Gram, man.
If you don't mind.
209
00:07:39,192 --> 00:07:41,128
Yeah. Okay, hold on,
let me think for a second.
210
00:07:41,161 --> 00:07:42,262
You ready? Uh...
211
00:07:42,295 --> 00:07:44,364
Early morning studio,
ID reporting for...
212
00:07:44,397 --> 00:07:46,033
Nigga, this is just
a picture, bro.
213
00:07:52,740 --> 00:07:56,276
Ugh, there's so much lettuce
on this.
214
00:07:56,309 --> 00:07:57,778
No, I told them no lettuce.
215
00:07:57,811 --> 00:08:00,023
Oh, he told me you made him
try a grape for the first time.
216
00:08:00,047 --> 00:08:02,716
I did. But he did not like it.
217
00:08:02,750 --> 00:08:04,718
He reported it was "too gushy."
218
00:08:04,752 --> 00:08:06,787
- Who eats those things?
- Most people.
219
00:08:06,820 --> 00:08:09,322
- Are you gonna grade papers right now?
- Yeah.
220
00:08:09,356 --> 00:08:11,825
I've told you how much
this fully turns me on, right?
221
00:08:11,859 --> 00:08:13,360
- Yeah.
- I've expressed that?
222
00:08:13,393 --> 00:08:15,395
- Wow.
- Yeah.
223
00:08:15,428 --> 00:08:16,964
You want me to teach you?
224
00:08:16,997 --> 00:08:18,474
- Everything that you know.
- You want me to
225
00:08:18,498 --> 00:08:20,668
tell you when to nap
on your cot?
226
00:08:20,701 --> 00:08:22,803
My dick wants to rip out
of its skin
227
00:08:22,836 --> 00:08:25,005
and run laps
around the playground.
228
00:08:25,038 --> 00:08:28,408
I don't know...
where to go with that.
229
00:08:28,441 --> 00:08:31,211
You can go into Dave's room,
where this shit belongs. I'm sorry.
230
00:08:31,244 --> 00:08:32,980
That's on me, coach.
231
00:08:33,013 --> 00:08:34,848
It's-it's easy.
232
00:08:34,882 --> 00:08:38,552
Yeah. But every now
and then I just... I guess,
233
00:08:38,586 --> 00:08:41,254
- lose my grip on reality.
- Dave? Don't.
234
00:08:41,288 --> 00:08:42,923
Really can't even
be tamed, stopped...
235
00:08:42,956 --> 00:08:45,893
Don't do it.
Don't, I'm serious. Don't!
236
00:08:45,926 --> 00:08:47,327
Okay. You sealed your fate.
237
00:08:47,360 --> 00:08:49,362
I'm gonna finish
Handmaid's Tale without you.
238
00:08:49,396 --> 00:08:50,731
- Stop.
- Yep, I will.
239
00:08:50,764 --> 00:08:52,566
Girlfriend, what?
Get away from me, freak.
240
00:08:52,600 --> 00:08:53,867
You gross me out.
241
00:08:53,901 --> 00:08:55,936
- That's better.
- The assignment
242
00:08:55,969 --> 00:08:58,438
is to draw what you want to be
when you grow up,
243
00:08:58,471 --> 00:09:00,874
and nobody drew a day trader.
244
00:09:00,908 --> 00:09:03,343
No? Did any of them draw
a kindergarten teacher?
245
00:09:03,376 --> 00:09:04,444
- No.
- No.
246
00:09:04,477 --> 00:09:06,022
I bet a lot of them
said they wanted to be
247
00:09:06,046 --> 00:09:07,615
- a musical artist, right?
- A few.
248
00:09:07,648 --> 00:09:08,782
I mean, that was always
249
00:09:08,816 --> 00:09:10,293
- my dream growing up.
- I think you're right.
250
00:09:10,317 --> 00:09:13,453
Some young, bright,
wet-behind-the-ears kid
251
00:09:13,486 --> 00:09:15,388
that's like,
"I want to be an unemployed Jew
252
00:09:15,422 --> 00:09:17,224
who pretends to be a rapper."
253
00:09:17,257 --> 00:09:19,526
And then you're the inspiration.
254
00:09:19,559 --> 00:09:20,928
Or...
255
00:09:20,961 --> 00:09:23,096
I'm a "once in a generation"
artist...
256
00:09:23,130 --> 00:09:24,464
Oh.
257
00:09:24,497 --> 00:09:25,541
Who just got verified on Twitter
258
00:09:25,565 --> 00:09:27,234
about, what, nine days ago?
259
00:09:27,267 --> 00:09:29,545
I'm glad you feel good that a
robot told you you're worth it.
260
00:09:29,569 --> 00:09:31,280
Actually, I'm gonna go
back there and just see
261
00:09:31,304 --> 00:09:32,582
what's going on... tap in...
Because I feel like
262
00:09:32,606 --> 00:09:33,817
there's people all over trying
to get a hold of me,
263
00:09:33,841 --> 00:09:35,943
- ask me questions. You know.
- Mm-hmm.
264
00:09:35,976 --> 00:09:37,410
- Do you want a hit of this?
- No.
265
00:09:37,444 --> 00:09:39,122
Last time I got stoned,
I talked to our neighbor Gary
266
00:09:39,146 --> 00:09:40,247
for an hour about cement.
267
00:09:40,280 --> 00:09:41,782
He calls it see-ment.
268
00:09:41,815 --> 00:09:44,451
- I hate parent-teacher night.
- Mm.
269
00:09:44,484 --> 00:09:46,486
Like, Jordan Beyers's parents
are riding me
270
00:09:46,519 --> 00:09:49,122
about his reading comprehension,
but the kid literally eats sand.
271
00:09:49,156 --> 00:09:52,092
Fistfuls of sand.
272
00:09:52,125 --> 00:09:53,560
Every day of his life.
273
00:09:53,593 --> 00:09:55,328
Holy moly.
274
00:09:55,362 --> 00:09:56,730
What?
275
00:10:00,668 --> 00:10:02,836
Huge turning point moment
in my career just occurred.
276
00:10:02,870 --> 00:10:05,438
- What?
- I was in the studio
277
00:10:05,472 --> 00:10:06,573
with YG today.
278
00:10:06,606 --> 00:10:08,108
Yes.
279
00:10:08,141 --> 00:10:09,342
Yes, I've heard of them.
280
00:10:09,376 --> 00:10:10,586
It's one guy, it's not a group.
281
00:10:10,610 --> 00:10:12,412
- Okay. Still cool.
- Yeah.
282
00:10:12,445 --> 00:10:13,814
What was he like?
What did he say?
283
00:10:13,847 --> 00:10:15,248
Well, we didn't really...
284
00:10:15,282 --> 00:10:16,817
I mean, when you're
in the studio,
285
00:10:16,850 --> 00:10:18,594
you don't really talk that much.
You just, like, vibe
286
00:10:18,618 --> 00:10:20,120
- and listen to music.
- Okay.
287
00:10:20,153 --> 00:10:23,323
But the really cool thing is,
his manager just texted me
288
00:10:23,356 --> 00:10:25,759
and said that YG will get
on one of my songs.
289
00:10:25,793 --> 00:10:27,661
- Dave.
- I kn... uh, yeah, I'm very excited.
290
00:10:27,695 --> 00:10:30,330
That's so cool. Wait, what song?
291
00:10:30,363 --> 00:10:31,765
- What...?
- Uh, what song?
292
00:10:31,799 --> 00:10:32,866
Can I hear it?
293
00:10:32,900 --> 00:10:35,602
You can hear it when it's done.
It's not done.
294
00:10:35,635 --> 00:10:38,138
I know. I don't like having
too many cooks in the kitchen...
295
00:10:38,171 --> 00:10:40,540
- But I won't cook. I'm just excited.
- Bless your soul.
296
00:10:40,573 --> 00:10:42,813
No, though, 'cause I just,
you know... trust the process.
297
00:10:42,843 --> 00:10:43,944
- Dave.
- What?
298
00:10:43,977 --> 00:10:45,512
You always do this.
299
00:10:45,545 --> 00:10:47,480
Do you realize
that I'm dating a rapper
300
00:10:47,514 --> 00:10:49,616
who I've never heard
rap out loud?
301
00:10:49,649 --> 00:10:51,218
Oh, my God, will you rap for me?
302
00:10:51,251 --> 00:10:53,887
Will you rap for me right now?
Oh, my God, rap for me.
303
00:10:53,921 --> 00:10:56,690
Rap for me.
This is a kindergarten beatbox.
304
00:10:56,724 --> 00:10:59,159
Throw down.
305
00:11:00,994 --> 00:11:02,963
- I don't know.
- Please.
306
00:11:02,996 --> 00:11:04,841
- Please.
- I don't know... I know, I'm sorry. I don't know.
307
00:11:04,865 --> 00:11:06,705
No, it's my job.
I-I don't ask you to come home
308
00:11:06,734 --> 00:11:08,135
and teach me things.
309
00:11:08,168 --> 00:11:11,171
Oh, you just asked me
if pork was beef.
310
00:11:11,204 --> 00:11:15,308
There are a lot of people that
don't know that distinction.
311
00:11:15,342 --> 00:11:18,178
Okay, can I at least know
the name of the song?
312
00:11:18,211 --> 00:11:21,014
"Girth."
313
00:11:21,048 --> 00:11:22,215
Hmm.
314
00:11:28,188 --> 00:11:29,556
Hello, my sweetheart.
315
00:11:29,589 --> 00:11:31,324
- Hi, Mama. How are you?
- I'm good.
316
00:11:31,358 --> 00:11:33,861
I texted Ally yesterday.
She hasn't texted me back.
317
00:11:33,894 --> 00:11:35,872
- Hey, wait until we get into the car.
- I was just wondering...
318
00:11:35,896 --> 00:11:37,564
- Don, I'm talking.
- I-I know,
319
00:11:37,597 --> 00:11:38,942
- but it has to switch over.
- I was...
320
00:11:38,966 --> 00:11:40,667
- Can you hear us?
- I can hear you.
321
00:11:40,700 --> 00:11:42,870
I think he can hear us now.
Can you hear us?
322
00:11:42,903 --> 00:11:44,404
I'm not gonna beat
around the bush.
323
00:11:44,437 --> 00:11:46,415
I'm calling because I'm about
to access my bar mitzvah money
324
00:11:46,439 --> 00:11:47,674
and I thought you should know.
325
00:11:47,707 --> 00:11:49,910
- What?
- Oh, my God. What's wrong?
326
00:11:49,943 --> 00:11:51,678
- Nothing's wrong.
- Everything's great.
327
00:11:51,711 --> 00:11:53,356
I'm actually getting, like,
a very big rapper
328
00:11:53,380 --> 00:11:55,415
on one of my songs,
but to do that,
329
00:11:55,448 --> 00:11:57,885
I have to pay him his fee,
which is $10,000 in this case.
330
00:11:57,918 --> 00:11:59,519
$10,000?
331
00:11:59,552 --> 00:12:00,921
Are you crazy? What... David,
332
00:12:00,954 --> 00:12:03,623
you haven't made a single dollar
off of this and now you want...
333
00:12:03,656 --> 00:12:05,301
How come we never talk
about the 15 million views
334
00:12:05,325 --> 00:12:06,702
that I've gotten
in three months, Mom?
335
00:12:06,726 --> 00:12:08,637
It's a huge accomplishment.
We never talk about that.
336
00:12:08,661 --> 00:12:10,697
But why can't you profit
off those views?
337
00:12:10,730 --> 00:12:13,266
Isn't there money
in the stream these days?
338
00:12:13,300 --> 00:12:14,634
It's called the cloud, Don.
339
00:12:14,667 --> 00:12:16,904
I can't profit off of it
because it's not my beat.
340
00:12:16,937 --> 00:12:18,371
It's just a beat I stole online.
341
00:12:18,405 --> 00:12:19,648
- So I can't even...
- You stole it?
342
00:12:19,672 --> 00:12:20,941
Wait a minute, what?
343
00:12:20,974 --> 00:12:22,910
- Did you steal it?
- What did he steal?
344
00:12:22,943 --> 00:12:25,312
- He stole his... his beat was stolen.
- He stole something?
345
00:12:25,345 --> 00:12:26,646
Oh. Oh, my God.
346
00:12:26,679 --> 00:12:28,648
Guys, it's not at all
how it sounds.
347
00:12:28,681 --> 00:12:31,051
It couldn't be more commonplace
in rap music for people
348
00:12:31,084 --> 00:12:32,585
to jump on other people's beats.
349
00:12:32,619 --> 00:12:33,821
You know, David,
350
00:12:33,854 --> 00:12:37,791
who is this rapper that
you are paying $10,000 to?
351
00:12:39,292 --> 00:12:40,894
YG? I'm gonna look this up.
352
00:12:40,928 --> 00:12:42,638
- Do you... do you have a pen?
- Is it... is it.
353
00:12:42,662 --> 00:12:45,332
"Why, G?" with a question mark?
354
00:12:45,365 --> 00:12:47,434
Or the-the letters "Y-G"?
355
00:12:47,467 --> 00:12:48,912
Google will answer
any question you have.
356
00:12:48,936 --> 00:12:50,570
I have to go. I love you both.
357
00:12:50,603 --> 00:12:51,939
- Is it Korean?
- I mean...
358
00:12:51,972 --> 00:12:53,582
- It... you know, it sounds...
- Like Wai Chi?
359
00:12:53,606 --> 00:12:54,683
Guys, I'm leaving right now.
I'm hanging up.
360
00:12:54,707 --> 00:12:55,785
- Is he...?
- Okay, but is it Korean?
361
00:12:55,809 --> 00:12:57,344
Is he a Korean rapper?
362
00:12:57,377 --> 00:13:00,280
Hello. Um, so I have
to wire $10,000
363
00:13:00,313 --> 00:13:03,817
to a company called
Blood Gang Entertainment LLC.
364
00:13:03,851 --> 00:13:07,921
Nutti.
365
00:13:11,491 --> 00:13:13,660
Hold on, wait a minute.
Slow down.
366
00:13:13,693 --> 00:13:15,795
So YG is getting on "Girth"?
367
00:13:15,829 --> 00:13:17,364
Yeah.
368
00:13:17,397 --> 00:13:19,032
Just sent him all the money.
369
00:13:19,066 --> 00:13:20,343
- Is that your "Girth" dance?
- Totally official.
370
00:13:20,367 --> 00:13:21,477
Yeah, it's my "Girth" dance.
371
00:13:21,501 --> 00:13:23,937
We did it. We've done it.
372
00:13:23,971 --> 00:13:25,438
You think that's a good idea?
373
00:13:25,472 --> 00:13:26,682
It's probably the best idea
I've ever had.
374
00:13:26,706 --> 00:13:27,875
It's a complete no-brainer.
375
00:13:27,908 --> 00:13:31,211
Oh, my...
376
00:13:31,244 --> 00:13:33,446
It's my boss. Dude,
377
00:13:33,480 --> 00:13:35,782
the market's been closed
for an hour now.
378
00:13:35,815 --> 00:13:37,617
I don't get any time off.
379
00:13:37,650 --> 00:13:38,886
Bring him everywhere, please.
380
00:13:38,919 --> 00:13:40,653
Like, he's a delight
to have around.
381
00:13:40,687 --> 00:13:42,966
Honestly, you will like him,
he's just high-strung right now
382
00:13:42,990 --> 00:13:44,824
'cause of his work.
He's a really good person.
383
00:13:44,858 --> 00:13:46,860
So you think YG,
384
00:13:46,894 --> 00:13:48,295
which stands for
"Young Gangster,"
385
00:13:48,328 --> 00:13:49,729
is going to get on a song
386
00:13:49,762 --> 00:13:51,398
rapping about the girth
of his dick?
387
00:13:51,431 --> 00:13:53,733
I got a seven, dude.
388
00:13:53,766 --> 00:13:56,336
"Girth" has so many
applications. What do you mean?
389
00:13:56,369 --> 00:13:59,039
The girth of his
girlfriend's breasts.
390
00:13:59,072 --> 00:14:01,308
The girth of his home...
I bet it's a huge home.
391
00:14:01,341 --> 00:14:03,911
No. Well, why can't you just rap
about normal things, like,
392
00:14:03,944 --> 00:14:05,321
I don't know,
getting head in the club
393
00:14:05,345 --> 00:14:07,547
and, like, having orgies
with your friends.
394
00:14:07,580 --> 00:14:08,858
Oh, yeah, I'll rap
about having orgies.
395
00:14:08,882 --> 00:14:10,426
I'll sound like the biggest
loser on planet Earth.
396
00:14:10,450 --> 00:14:13,153
You could always rap about,
like, the struggles
397
00:14:13,186 --> 00:14:15,923
of a young Jewish man.
398
00:14:15,956 --> 00:14:18,067
You're gonna make fun of me
'cause I have no struggles?
399
00:14:18,091 --> 00:14:19,568
I literally met you
at overnight camp;
400
00:14:19,592 --> 00:14:20,860
Your father is a dentist.
401
00:14:20,894 --> 00:14:22,896
And I'm not a rapper.
I'm a sound engineer.
402
00:14:22,930 --> 00:14:23,997
You're not gonna trick YG
403
00:14:24,031 --> 00:14:25,999
into rapping about the girthness
of his dick.
404
00:14:26,033 --> 00:14:27,200
There's no trick here.
405
00:14:27,234 --> 00:14:28,601
He's a businessman, bro.
406
00:14:28,635 --> 00:14:30,213
He sells shit at Barneys.
He's not an idiot.
407
00:14:30,237 --> 00:14:32,739
You know, I read the other day
that YG is actually vegan.
408
00:14:32,772 --> 00:14:34,207
Which shocked me.
409
00:14:34,241 --> 00:14:35,742
I would have expected
that guy to be
410
00:14:35,775 --> 00:14:37,677
fully carnivorous.
411
00:14:59,332 --> 00:15:00,767
Hey.
412
00:15:00,800 --> 00:15:02,535
Can you please knock
when you walk in here?
413
00:15:02,569 --> 00:15:03,636
Did you tweet this?
414
00:15:04,671 --> 00:15:07,807
"Just got head." Yeah.
415
00:15:07,840 --> 00:15:09,276
Are you fucking kidding me?
416
00:15:09,309 --> 00:15:11,244
- What?
- Dave, my mom just called
417
00:15:11,278 --> 00:15:13,313
and asked why you're telling
everyone on Twitter
418
00:15:13,346 --> 00:15:15,115
that I gave you head.
419
00:15:15,148 --> 00:15:18,385
Well, I didn't say that
Ally Wernick gave me head.
420
00:15:18,418 --> 00:15:20,587
I was very nonspecific.
It just said, "Just got head."
421
00:15:20,620 --> 00:15:24,757
Oh, cool. Um, so who's
giving you head, then?
422
00:15:24,791 --> 00:15:27,961
Nobody, Al. It's fictitious
head. It's a joke.
423
00:15:27,995 --> 00:15:29,829
I'm happy to jump on the phone
with your mom
424
00:15:29,862 --> 00:15:31,598
and explain how Twitter works
and how
425
00:15:31,631 --> 00:15:33,242
everything that's tweeted isn't
a real thing necessarily.
426
00:15:33,266 --> 00:15:34,467
Oh, it's a very real thing
427
00:15:34,501 --> 00:15:38,238
that my very real principal
at my real job can read.
428
00:15:38,271 --> 00:15:40,073
You guys need to stop
thinking about this
429
00:15:40,107 --> 00:15:42,151
like it's Dave Burd's Twitter.
This is Lil Dicky tweeting.
430
00:15:42,175 --> 00:15:43,843
They are
totally different things.
431
00:15:43,876 --> 00:15:45,288
Okay, then explain to me
the difference,
432
00:15:45,312 --> 00:15:46,746
just so we're clear.
433
00:15:46,779 --> 00:15:48,291
Dave Burd takes your feelings
into account
434
00:15:48,315 --> 00:15:49,849
at every waking moment.
435
00:15:49,882 --> 00:15:52,452
Lil Dicky, on the other hand,
can never do that.
436
00:15:52,485 --> 00:15:55,188
I'm sorry. I can't worry
about what my girlfriend
437
00:15:55,222 --> 00:15:57,024
and her kindergarten class
are gonna think
438
00:15:57,057 --> 00:15:59,026
as I rap lyrics about, like,
439
00:15:59,059 --> 00:16:01,961
69-ing a girl on her period.
440
00:16:01,995 --> 00:16:04,431
I mean,
that's a terrible example.
441
00:16:04,464 --> 00:16:07,034
But think of me as, like,
a corporation.
442
00:16:07,067 --> 00:16:09,769
Like, when Wendy's tweets,
for example,
443
00:16:09,802 --> 00:16:12,472
I don't think anybody thinks
that it's actually Wendy.
444
00:16:12,505 --> 00:16:15,275
No! Because Wendy
is not a real person.
445
00:16:15,308 --> 00:16:17,510
Okay? And-and Wendy's
isn't tweeting
446
00:16:17,544 --> 00:16:20,213
that Wendy sucked
Dave Thomas's dick.
447
00:16:22,215 --> 00:16:24,127
Wendy is a real person,
it's Dave Thomas's daughter.
448
00:16:24,151 --> 00:16:25,894
- You're not gonna want to hear that, but...
- Oh, my God.
449
00:16:25,918 --> 00:16:29,789
Okay. I-I don't want my mom
knowing that I give you head.
450
00:16:29,822 --> 00:16:31,291
You can wrap your brain
around that.
451
00:16:31,324 --> 00:16:32,835
Your mom knows you give me head.
My mom...
452
00:16:32,859 --> 00:16:34,570
Everybody's giving
everybody head at our age.
453
00:16:34,594 --> 00:16:36,896
- I didn't give you head!
- I know, Al!
454
00:16:36,929 --> 00:16:38,574
That's my... you're making
my point for me.
455
00:16:38,598 --> 00:16:40,209
I don't even know what
we're talking about here!
456
00:16:58,551 --> 00:17:02,021
I wired YG's manager
$10,000 today.
457
00:17:04,023 --> 00:17:06,093
I didn't tell you that yet.
458
00:17:06,126 --> 00:17:09,329
And as soon as I did that,
459
00:17:09,362 --> 00:17:12,399
he stopped responding to all
of my text messages, so...
460
00:17:12,432 --> 00:17:15,435
- $10,000?
- Yep.
461
00:17:15,468 --> 00:17:16,903
I have no idea
where the money is.
462
00:17:16,936 --> 00:17:18,214
I don't even know
who this guy is
463
00:17:18,238 --> 00:17:20,015
or even if he's a real person.
I've never met him.
464
00:17:20,039 --> 00:17:22,109
You've never met him?
465
00:17:22,142 --> 00:17:23,843
No.
466
00:17:23,876 --> 00:17:26,179
All I know about him is that
his name is Nutti.
467
00:17:26,213 --> 00:17:27,880
Oh, Dave.
468
00:17:27,914 --> 00:17:30,283
Al, I'm sorry
for being an asshole.
469
00:17:30,317 --> 00:17:31,718
I should never have said that.
470
00:17:31,751 --> 00:17:34,087
But I love you so much.
You're my moon, you're my rock,
471
00:17:34,121 --> 00:17:35,722
you're my favorite person
in the world.
472
00:17:35,755 --> 00:17:37,290
Tied with my parents.
473
00:17:37,324 --> 00:17:39,726
But I'm a wreck right now.
474
00:17:39,759 --> 00:17:41,428
I've never been more stressed
in my life.
475
00:17:41,461 --> 00:17:43,096
Before you came,
I was actually crying.
476
00:17:43,130 --> 00:17:45,098
- You were crying?
- Yes.
477
00:17:48,468 --> 00:17:51,070
Do you want a belly rub?
478
00:17:51,104 --> 00:17:53,240
Really? Yes.
479
00:17:53,273 --> 00:17:55,142
Oh, my God.
480
00:18:01,481 --> 00:18:03,126
I'm putting the weight
of the world on you.
481
00:18:03,150 --> 00:18:05,752
It's on me;
I need to get it off me.
482
00:18:09,856 --> 00:18:11,591
So let me get this straight.
483
00:18:11,624 --> 00:18:14,060
There were absolutely
no contracts at all?
484
00:18:14,093 --> 00:18:16,629
No, there's no contracts
485
00:18:16,663 --> 00:18:18,907
at this phase... it's laughable
you'd even suggest such a thing.
486
00:18:18,931 --> 00:18:20,800
Stupid guy over here.
I just work with people
487
00:18:20,833 --> 00:18:22,445
on Wall Street all the time.
I don't know about money
488
00:18:22,469 --> 00:18:23,946
or business
or any of that kind of stuff.
489
00:18:23,970 --> 00:18:25,614
It's a totally different world.
What are you talking about?
490
00:18:25,638 --> 00:18:27,940
Did you ever think for a second
that perhaps this guy
491
00:18:27,974 --> 00:18:30,277
who introduced you to Nutsi
maybe set you up
492
00:18:30,310 --> 00:18:31,644
just to take your money?
493
00:18:31,678 --> 00:18:33,746
Gata?
494
00:18:33,780 --> 00:18:36,082
Gata? That's a man's name?
495
00:18:36,115 --> 00:18:38,285
I didn't even think about that
as a possibility.
496
00:18:38,318 --> 00:18:40,329
Of course you didn't. Your brain
is basically pulled pork.
497
00:18:40,353 --> 00:18:42,021
Come on, dude, you got scammed.
498
00:18:42,054 --> 00:18:43,199
If I go and talk
to this guy Gata,
499
00:18:43,223 --> 00:18:44,291
will you come with me?
500
00:18:44,324 --> 00:18:46,193
No. Why me?
501
00:18:46,226 --> 00:18:48,861
You were just lecturing him
about business and money.
502
00:18:48,895 --> 00:18:50,263
Mike, you're my best friend.
503
00:18:50,297 --> 00:18:52,199
I'm asking you to come, please.
504
00:18:52,232 --> 00:18:53,433
I love you.
505
00:18:53,466 --> 00:18:54,601
Take Ally.
506
00:18:54,634 --> 00:18:55,678
- Weekends are for me.
- No.
507
00:18:55,702 --> 00:18:56,969
You're a pussy. I'll go.
508
00:18:57,003 --> 00:18:59,672
Call a Lyft.
I don't give a fuck.
509
00:18:59,706 --> 00:19:00,949
I'm not gonna bring
my girlfriend
510
00:19:00,973 --> 00:19:02,518
with me to get the m...
It just feels like
511
00:19:02,542 --> 00:19:03,976
such a weird thing to do.
512
00:19:04,010 --> 00:19:05,545
I know that's sexist,
probably, but...
513
00:19:05,578 --> 00:19:07,113
- It is.
- It's even weirder
514
00:19:07,146 --> 00:19:08,524
to take me, 'cause then
it looks like you went
515
00:19:08,548 --> 00:19:10,559
and got your muscle, and they're
just gonna be like...
516
00:19:10,583 --> 00:19:11,784
You're the muscle?
517
00:19:11,818 --> 00:19:13,386
You're laughing at me?
518
00:19:13,420 --> 00:19:15,655
You have sex with a man
with no muscle on his body.
519
00:19:15,688 --> 00:19:16,656
That's bone and tendon.
520
00:19:16,689 --> 00:19:18,033
You're a marionette.
You know that.
521
00:19:18,057 --> 00:19:19,859
Okay, why do we need to go?
You just go.
522
00:19:19,892 --> 00:19:23,863
- Yeah.
- Y... you guys haven't met this guy.
523
00:19:23,896 --> 00:19:26,041
You have no context. Never mind,
I'll figure something out.
524
00:19:26,065 --> 00:19:27,066
Dicky.
525
00:19:27,099 --> 00:19:28,868
Lil Dicky. Holy shit, man.
526
00:19:28,901 --> 00:19:31,738
- Hi.
- Hey. Gosh, can I get a pic?
527
00:19:31,771 --> 00:19:33,306
- Yeah, of course.
- Definitely.
528
00:19:33,340 --> 00:19:36,509
Sweet. Um, you know, uh,
I'm a rapper, too.
529
00:19:36,543 --> 00:19:38,711
Um, I go by Nuance.
530
00:19:38,745 --> 00:19:39,746
Cool.
531
00:19:39,779 --> 00:19:40,847
- Nuance?
- Yeah.
532
00:19:40,880 --> 00:19:41,881
Send him all your stuff.
533
00:19:41,914 --> 00:19:43,158
You guys could collab
or something.
534
00:19:43,182 --> 00:19:44,317
Three, two...
535
00:19:44,351 --> 00:19:45,685
G-Get a few, just in case.
536
00:19:45,718 --> 00:19:46,819
- I got it.
- Very tight.
537
00:19:46,853 --> 00:19:48,521
Um, so, is this your girl?
538
00:19:48,555 --> 00:19:51,090
- Still here.
- Yeah.
539
00:19:51,123 --> 00:19:52,668
I just think it's so sick
how you tweet after you, like,
540
00:19:52,692 --> 00:19:53,693
get head and shit.
541
00:19:56,796 --> 00:19:57,796
You're my hero, man.
542
00:19:59,932 --> 00:20:02,402
I think that happens
to most couples.
543
00:20:08,207 --> 00:20:10,677
Thank you for coming with me.
I appreciate it.
544
00:20:10,710 --> 00:20:12,211
Yeah, of course.
Obviously, you know,
545
00:20:12,245 --> 00:20:15,615
you got to have me around
sometimes.
546
00:20:15,648 --> 00:20:17,116
What does that mean?
547
00:20:17,149 --> 00:20:20,052
It-it means that
we're in the hood
548
00:20:20,086 --> 00:20:21,754
and you had no other friends
to bring...
549
00:20:21,788 --> 00:20:23,923
Wait, this is the hood
right now?
550
00:20:23,956 --> 00:20:25,434
There's no line that defines,
like, "We're in the hood,"
551
00:20:25,458 --> 00:20:27,527
or a sign that says,
"Welcome to the hood."
552
00:20:27,560 --> 00:20:29,762
- But, like, we are in the janky.
- Right.
553
00:20:29,796 --> 00:20:32,799
Song with YG worked out, right?
554
00:20:32,832 --> 00:20:34,534
Please stop.
555
00:20:34,567 --> 00:20:37,045
- Mr. Nuts took everything from you.
- I need... I need you... I...
556
00:20:37,069 --> 00:20:39,306
- His name is Nutti.
- Oh...
557
00:20:39,339 --> 00:20:41,274
- "His name is Nutti."
- And we're not even going
558
00:20:41,308 --> 00:20:42,718
to Nutti's house,
we're going to Gata's house.
559
00:20:42,742 --> 00:20:44,210
Oh! Gata!
560
00:20:44,243 --> 00:20:47,647
"Yeah, Mr. Gator, Mr. Nuts,
your 10:00 is here."
561
00:20:47,680 --> 00:20:49,282
Shut the fuck up.
562
00:20:51,318 --> 00:20:54,287
Lil Dicky poppin' out
in South Central?
563
00:20:54,321 --> 00:20:56,231
- I can't believe this.
- Oh, is this South Central?
564
00:20:56,255 --> 00:20:57,624
Like Don't Be a Menace?
565
00:20:57,657 --> 00:20:59,268
Hey, you the engineer that be
at the studio, right, bro?
566
00:20:59,292 --> 00:21:00,893
- Yeah, papi, Elz.
- Papi?
567
00:21:00,927 --> 00:21:02,567
Man, save that gay shit
for New York, bro.
568
00:21:02,595 --> 00:21:04,631
- We on the west right now, cuh.
- Oh.
569
00:21:04,664 --> 00:21:06,299
I'm messing with you, man.
My uncle gay.
570
00:21:06,333 --> 00:21:08,301
And he a cold-ass nigga.
Come on in, y'all.
571
00:21:08,335 --> 00:21:10,269
Okay.
572
00:21:10,303 --> 00:21:12,639
- Hey, we got company.
- Hi. Catherine.
573
00:21:12,672 --> 00:21:14,182
Moms, we don't just got anybody
in the spot right now.
574
00:21:14,206 --> 00:21:15,274
We got Lil Dicky in here.
575
00:21:15,308 --> 00:21:17,344
He one of the best new rappers
in the game.
576
00:21:17,377 --> 00:21:19,646
Oh, what's up, Lil Dicky?
577
00:21:19,679 --> 00:21:20,947
Oh, no, I'm a normal person.
578
00:21:20,980 --> 00:21:22,949
That thing right there
is Lil Dicky.
579
00:21:24,150 --> 00:21:25,618
I'm the rapper,
isn't that funny?
580
00:21:25,652 --> 00:21:27,920
I'm Lil Dicky.
But call me Dave. I prefer that.
581
00:21:27,954 --> 00:21:30,022
Oh. Well, why you
call yourself Lil Dicky?
582
00:21:30,056 --> 00:21:31,458
You got a Lil Dicky?
583
00:21:31,491 --> 00:21:33,192
Soft, it's never even
grown at all,
584
00:21:33,225 --> 00:21:35,695
- since I was a child, but...
- Uh, mm-mm.
585
00:21:35,728 --> 00:21:37,830
No, it's just kind of like a...
play on a rap name.
586
00:21:37,864 --> 00:21:39,666
The opposite of
what you'd expect.
587
00:21:39,699 --> 00:21:41,468
So, you're a satirical rapper.
588
00:21:41,501 --> 00:21:44,036
Jackpot. See? I told you people
understand what I'm doing.
589
00:21:46,339 --> 00:21:49,776
Um... So, Gata, I have something
relatively serious
590
00:21:49,809 --> 00:21:52,211
I need to talk with you about.
Remember that guy Nutti
591
00:21:52,244 --> 00:21:54,289
- that you set me up with for the YG verse?
- Mm-hmm.
592
00:21:54,313 --> 00:21:56,349
So, they said "yes"
to doing a song.
593
00:21:56,383 --> 00:21:58,284
I sent him $10,000.
594
00:21:58,317 --> 00:22:00,152
As soon as the money
went through,
595
00:22:00,186 --> 00:22:03,022
he completely stopped responding
to all my text messages.
596
00:22:03,055 --> 00:22:06,025
And the whole thing
feels very...
597
00:22:06,058 --> 00:22:08,060
- coincidental and...
- Wait, wait, wait.
598
00:22:08,094 --> 00:22:10,096
Coincidental how?
599
00:22:11,364 --> 00:22:14,901
You know, I have to assume
that my money's gone,
600
00:22:14,934 --> 00:22:17,837
and Gata set the whole thing up,
so I don't mean
601
00:22:17,870 --> 00:22:18,881
- to be accusing...
- Hold up, bro.
602
00:22:18,905 --> 00:22:20,573
Ain't nobody run off
with nothing, man.
603
00:22:20,607 --> 00:22:22,842
Nutti changed his number.
You got to kill that energy
604
00:22:22,875 --> 00:22:25,253
- in my house, though. For real.
- Nutti changed his cell phone number?
605
00:22:25,277 --> 00:22:27,990
- That's what I just said.
- Who would change their number in the middle of
606
00:22:28,014 --> 00:22:30,859
- a $10,000 wire exchange?
- I'm sending you his new line right now. Relax.
607
00:22:30,883 --> 00:22:33,052
Okay, I'm gonna text him
right now.
608
00:22:33,085 --> 00:22:34,987
Come on, bro,
you got me looking crazy.
609
00:22:35,021 --> 00:22:37,099
No, I wasn't saying that I was
certain it was you, by the way.
610
00:22:37,123 --> 00:22:39,358
I was just trying
to think about what happened
611
00:22:39,392 --> 00:22:42,328
and replaying everything and
thinking about who the suspects
612
00:22:42,361 --> 00:22:45,064
- could even be and...
- Oh, and you thought of my son.
613
00:22:45,097 --> 00:22:47,066
Gee, I wonder why that is.
614
00:22:47,099 --> 00:22:48,501
Small things to a giant.
615
00:22:48,535 --> 00:22:50,078
I ain't even tripping,
this shit regular.
616
00:22:50,102 --> 00:22:52,939
People size me up all the time
and stereotype me.
617
00:22:52,972 --> 00:22:55,508
Putting me in a box like
I'm some thug. Just like you.
618
00:22:55,542 --> 00:22:58,445
You look like a nerd, all corny.
But you rap hard, though.
619
00:22:58,478 --> 00:23:00,188
Like, people play they self
when they do that shit, man.
620
00:23:00,212 --> 00:23:01,881
How you gonna do me like that?
621
00:23:04,283 --> 00:23:06,085
I hear you.
622
00:23:06,118 --> 00:23:09,756
And... it seems
I have made a fool of myself
623
00:23:09,789 --> 00:23:11,424
and I'm very sorry.
624
00:23:11,458 --> 00:23:14,393
- You should be.
- I know. And I'm...
625
00:23:14,427 --> 00:23:16,228
embarrassed.
626
00:23:16,262 --> 00:23:18,798
I'm sorry. Oh, my God.
Nutti just responded.
627
00:23:18,831 --> 00:23:21,477
- Uh, he says if we go right now, we can do the verse.
- YG in the studio right now?
628
00:23:21,501 --> 00:23:23,646
- Yeah.
- Oh, I got to go with you, bro. We got to get this sorted out.
629
00:23:23,670 --> 00:23:25,470
- Please come. You'll come?
- Yeah, I'm going.
630
00:23:31,611 --> 00:23:34,080
What's up?
631
00:23:35,815 --> 00:23:37,049
Hi.
632
00:23:37,083 --> 00:23:38,150
Lil Dicky, remember?
633
00:23:38,184 --> 00:23:41,320
Lil Dicky. What up, bro?
634
00:23:41,353 --> 00:23:43,499
- Oh, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa!
- Balmain, down.
635
00:23:43,523 --> 00:23:45,992
Aah! Try to control your
fear. He can smell fear.
636
00:23:46,025 --> 00:23:47,335
- Control my fear?
- How do I do that?
637
00:23:47,359 --> 00:23:48,394
I reek of fear.
638
00:23:48,427 --> 00:23:49,829
Just chill, man. Relax.
639
00:23:49,862 --> 00:23:50,863
- Balmain.
- Ah!
640
00:23:53,299 --> 00:23:55,668
Damn, even the dog Balmain?
That's hard.
641
00:23:55,702 --> 00:23:58,581
- Yo, what you doing here, bro?
- Oh, man, you know me. I'm just in here, chilling.
642
00:23:58,605 --> 00:24:00,649
You know what I'm saying, seeing
what's good. What's good, Nutti?
643
00:24:00,673 --> 00:24:03,442
- Nah, nah, you got to skate, man.
- Bro, I'm the one that set this
644
00:24:03,476 --> 00:24:05,688
- whole little verse thing...
- Yeah, I don't give a fuck, bruh.
645
00:24:05,712 --> 00:24:07,947
Hey, man, it's like...
Man, you being extra, too, man.
646
00:24:07,980 --> 00:24:09,516
You burnt out, bro.
647
00:24:09,549 --> 00:24:11,951
Come on, man.
648
00:24:11,984 --> 00:24:13,085
Hate broke niggas.
649
00:24:13,119 --> 00:24:15,087
Shit make me nervous.
650
00:24:15,121 --> 00:24:16,288
For sure.
651
00:24:16,322 --> 00:24:17,957
YG, Lil Dicky.
652
00:24:17,990 --> 00:24:19,692
What up, man?
653
00:24:19,726 --> 00:24:21,327
Good to meet you.
654
00:24:21,360 --> 00:24:22,762
So...
655
00:24:22,795 --> 00:24:25,131
I don't know what
Nutti has told you,
656
00:24:25,164 --> 00:24:27,433
but I've got this one song
called "Girth" that I really
657
00:24:27,466 --> 00:24:29,536
- think would be a huge...
- Hey, D, hey, hey.
658
00:24:29,569 --> 00:24:31,704
Turn the bass up, bro.
659
00:25:05,204 --> 00:25:06,505
Guns! Wow.
660
00:25:06,539 --> 00:25:08,407
Could've used
a heads-up about that.
661
00:25:08,440 --> 00:25:10,409
Lot of guns over here.
662
00:25:10,442 --> 00:25:11,844
Oh.
663
00:25:11,878 --> 00:25:13,880
Sorry, I just noticed
all the weaponry.
664
00:25:13,913 --> 00:25:17,249
I didn't know
if something was afoot,
665
00:25:17,283 --> 00:25:18,683
or if the safeties were on,
or what.
666
00:25:20,587 --> 00:25:22,021
Hey, 'Rell,
you know he a rapper?
667
00:25:22,054 --> 00:25:23,590
Thought he was a new intern.
668
00:25:23,623 --> 00:25:26,092
No, 'Rell.
You've got me all wrong.
669
00:25:26,125 --> 00:25:28,595
I'm actually
one of the best rappers alive.
670
00:25:28,628 --> 00:25:30,863
Yeah. And in five years,
you're gonna replay
671
00:25:30,897 --> 00:25:34,066
this entire moment and be like,
"Wow, not only was he right,
672
00:25:34,100 --> 00:25:36,669
"but I was so lucky to spend
that quality time with him
673
00:25:36,703 --> 00:25:38,504
before he really took off."
674
00:25:38,537 --> 00:25:41,774
That's what every rapper say.
The same shit.
675
00:25:41,808 --> 00:25:43,843
Well, every good rapper
has to feel that way.
676
00:25:43,876 --> 00:25:45,888
Do you want to pull up the
session that I want to work on
677
00:25:45,912 --> 00:25:47,923
- with you and see if I'm just like every other...
- You be fucking black bitches,
678
00:25:47,947 --> 00:25:49,115
Lil Dicky?
679
00:25:49,148 --> 00:25:51,083
You said,
"Do I fuck black bitches?"
680
00:25:51,117 --> 00:25:52,652
Do you fuck black bitches,
Lil Dicky?
681
00:25:53,786 --> 00:25:56,088
Well, statistically,
I certainly skew white.
682
00:25:56,122 --> 00:25:59,225
So, what kind of hos
you fuck with, then, Lil Dicky?
683
00:25:59,258 --> 00:26:01,303
What type of hos? Well,
you know, I've got a girlfriend.
684
00:26:01,327 --> 00:26:04,263
So, I typically fuck with her.
Fuck on her. All that.
685
00:26:04,296 --> 00:26:05,798
Real cute girl.
686
00:26:05,832 --> 00:26:08,735
Honestly, the sex is very solid.
687
00:26:08,768 --> 00:26:11,704
Uh, she has recently just
switched birth controls, though,
688
00:26:11,738 --> 00:26:15,107
- which... her vagina gets dryer faster, which...
- Damn.
689
00:26:15,141 --> 00:26:17,309
- I'm giving way too much information.
- Bruh.
690
00:26:17,343 --> 00:26:19,045
Her pussy really dry?
691
00:26:19,078 --> 00:26:21,213
- Sometimes.
- Oh, yo.
692
00:26:21,247 --> 00:26:24,884
I will keep my ear to the pussy
the next time I'm in that ass,
693
00:26:24,917 --> 00:26:28,788
or... pussy, I guess,
'cause I've never done anal.
694
00:26:28,821 --> 00:26:30,623
Don't think
I'd like it very much.
695
00:26:30,657 --> 00:26:32,467
Are you guys going to Coachella
this year or what?
696
00:26:32,491 --> 00:26:34,661
Hey, man. Hold up, man.
697
00:26:34,694 --> 00:26:36,629
I got to get you
on my Instagram, bruh.
698
00:26:36,663 --> 00:26:39,732
- Oh, is it a video or a picture?
- It's a video, bruh. Spit some shit.
699
00:26:39,766 --> 00:26:42,101
- You funny as fuck.
- Rap to the fans, Lil Dicky.
700
00:26:42,134 --> 00:26:44,804
Oh, I don't know
about that, I don't...
701
00:26:44,837 --> 00:26:46,806
Spit some shit, Lil Dicky. Rap!
702
00:26:46,839 --> 00:26:47,940
You know, I'm really, I...
703
00:26:47,974 --> 00:26:49,685
wasn't prepared at all
for this type of thing.
704
00:26:49,709 --> 00:26:51,678
Don't film yet. Are you filming?
I don't, uh...
705
00:26:51,711 --> 00:26:54,480
- I don't know.
- Man, I thought this dude was a rapper.
706
00:26:54,513 --> 00:26:57,449
Man, yo, Peter Parker's
scared to rap. Hey, D.
707
00:26:57,483 --> 00:26:59,427
Fuck it, man. Hey,
let's make a beat from scratch.
708
00:26:59,451 --> 00:27:00,820
Fuck this nigga.
709
00:27:06,158 --> 00:27:07,426
Wait.
710
00:28:28,908 --> 00:28:31,043
Like a flash drive.
711
00:28:34,914 --> 00:28:37,083
- He kind of tight. Yeah.
- Damn.
712
00:28:37,116 --> 00:28:39,185
Hey, Lil Dicky bitch,
if you listening,
713
00:28:39,218 --> 00:28:41,754
hit him
with that slickness tonight!
714
00:28:41,788 --> 00:28:43,956
- Oh-oh-oh. Uh...
- None of that dry shit.
715
00:28:43,990 --> 00:28:46,959
Don't take that birth control
till tomorrow, baby.
716
00:28:46,993 --> 00:28:48,360
Did you post that already?
717
00:28:48,394 --> 00:28:49,772
Please don't post that.
Did you post it?
718
00:28:49,796 --> 00:28:51,363
Yeah.
719
00:28:51,397 --> 00:28:53,099
- Oh.
- Hey, I'm tired, bro.
720
00:28:53,132 --> 00:28:55,367
I'm going. Let's go.
721
00:28:55,401 --> 00:28:57,103
Wait, where are you guys going?
722
00:28:57,136 --> 00:28:58,771
Oh, we got a quick Europe run.
723
00:28:58,805 --> 00:29:00,439
We'll be back in a few weeks.
724
00:29:00,472 --> 00:29:02,708
A few weeks? What do you mean?
What about the verse?
725
00:29:02,741 --> 00:29:04,276
Oh. Oh, nah, nah.
726
00:29:04,310 --> 00:29:06,112
We'll take care of that
when I get back.
727
00:29:06,145 --> 00:29:08,614
- Well, I would love to settle up right now.
- Yo, yo, yo.
728
00:29:08,647 --> 00:29:09,816
Why you pressin' me, bro?
729
00:29:09,849 --> 00:29:12,251
I don't like that shit. Twin.
730
00:29:12,284 --> 00:29:13,552
Wait.
731
00:29:13,585 --> 00:29:15,263
Wait a minute.
Just... slow down. I don't...
732
00:29:15,287 --> 00:29:17,265
Are you gonna change your number
between now and then?
733
00:29:17,289 --> 00:29:19,658
I said I got you.
734
00:29:19,691 --> 00:29:21,293
W-Wait a minute. Hold on.
735
00:29:21,327 --> 00:29:23,562
Hold the phone.
Hold on, hold on.
736
00:29:27,533 --> 00:29:29,635
Yo, yo.
737
00:29:29,668 --> 00:29:32,504
Hey, man, uh, so, I paid
738
00:29:32,538 --> 00:29:35,274
you guys my life savings
to get on one of my songs,
739
00:29:35,307 --> 00:29:36,852
and we were supposed
to work on it tonight,
740
00:29:36,876 --> 00:29:38,244
and that did not happen.
741
00:29:38,277 --> 00:29:40,246
Damn, bro.
742
00:29:40,279 --> 00:29:41,580
My bad.
743
00:29:41,613 --> 00:29:43,816
- You know, I don't...
- Bro, don't trip.
744
00:29:43,850 --> 00:29:45,651
When I get back,
we gonna do something crazy.
745
00:29:45,684 --> 00:29:47,653
- A'ight?
- You promise?
746
00:29:47,686 --> 00:29:49,021
I got you.
747
00:29:49,055 --> 00:29:50,857
We good?
748
00:29:50,890 --> 00:29:52,324
Yeah, we're good.
749
00:30:08,908 --> 00:30:12,144
Man, YG get a couple hits,
go all Hollywood.
750
00:30:12,178 --> 00:30:13,812
Had me out here
for an hour, bro.
751
00:30:13,846 --> 00:30:15,281
Did he do the verse or what?
752
00:30:15,314 --> 00:30:17,116
No, he didn't do the verse.
753
00:30:17,149 --> 00:30:19,986
He did put me on his Instagram
rapping for, like, two minutes.
754
00:30:20,019 --> 00:30:22,064
- He put you on his Instagram rapping?
- Yeah, and it's going viral.
755
00:30:22,088 --> 00:30:24,056
- I can't believe that.
- Yeah, look.
756
00:30:24,090 --> 00:30:26,392
Dang, that... This is way sicker
than a verse.
757
00:30:26,425 --> 00:30:28,895
He basically directed
a music video for you, bro.
758
00:30:28,928 --> 00:30:31,397
Gata, I am incredibly high.
759
00:30:31,430 --> 00:30:32,831
Would you drive my car?
760
00:30:32,865 --> 00:30:34,400
I got you, bro. Let's wiggle.
761
00:30:34,433 --> 00:30:36,102
Okay.
762
00:30:37,703 --> 00:30:39,305
Hey, be honest with me.
763
00:30:39,338 --> 00:30:42,474
Were you just using me to get
into the studio with them?
764
00:30:42,508 --> 00:30:45,044
Man, you know I got
to do what I got to do, bro.
765
00:30:45,077 --> 00:30:47,489
- I'm a positive opportunist. You know how I gander and wiggle.
- I know.
766
00:30:47,513 --> 00:30:49,491
We 'posed to be like Kobe and
Shaq, bro. I got to get mine.
767
00:30:49,515 --> 00:30:51,326
You 'posed to throw it
off the glass, bro. I rap, too.
768
00:30:51,350 --> 00:30:54,486
- Like, what's good? I ain't...
- No, I'm not mad. I...
769
00:30:54,520 --> 00:30:57,056
I'm honored to be a part of your
gander, as you would put it.
770
00:30:57,089 --> 00:30:58,224
I think it's cool.
771
00:30:58,257 --> 00:30:59,225
I think we're gonna be
telling this story at,
772
00:30:59,258 --> 00:31:00,268
like, our 50th birthday parties.
773
00:31:00,292 --> 00:31:01,593
50th birthday party?
774
00:31:01,627 --> 00:31:02,704
What's really good
with this weekend?
775
00:31:02,728 --> 00:31:04,931
What's the plot, fool?
776
00:31:04,964 --> 00:31:07,033
I'm not doing anything
this weekend.
777
00:31:07,066 --> 00:31:08,767
I need to rest.
778
00:32:02,854 --> 00:32:05,857
Captioned by
Media Access Group at WGBH.
779
00:32:11,197 --> 00:32:13,265
Do I just knock, or what?
What do you think?
780
00:32:14,933 --> 00:32:16,935
I feel like
they're not ever gonna...
781
00:32:18,870 --> 00:32:20,906
Why are you wearing
your sunglasses inside?
782
00:32:20,939 --> 00:32:23,659
Bro, you know I gotta drip,
bro. We're goin' to the studio right now.
783
00:32:24,443 --> 00:32:26,178
Snack Time. I didn't...
784
00:32:26,212 --> 00:32:28,647
Okay. You're welcome.
785
00:32:29,982 --> 00:32:32,151
I feel like that did nothing
for my career.
786
00:32:41,360 --> 00:32:42,694
Oh, damn!
787
00:32:54,973 --> 00:32:57,943
Do me a favor?
Never look me in the eye again.
788
00:32:57,976 --> 00:33:00,946
Okay? 'Cause your stare
is way too intense.
789
00:33:00,979 --> 00:33:02,748
It's starting to make
my hair fall out.
790
00:33:09,755 --> 00:33:11,657
This is your station.
791
00:33:11,690 --> 00:33:14,793
But... what am I
actually doing here?
792
00:33:14,826 --> 00:33:16,628
I'm not gonna tell you.
793
00:33:16,662 --> 00:33:19,065
Don't worry.
You're gonna figure it out.
60998
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