Original subtitles

♫ Worlds away from anyone

♫ They were burning themselves out in the sun

♫ Worlds away from anyone

♫ They were burning themselves out in the sun

♫ And it was just enough to keep them all away

- [Lockie Voiceover] Sometimes in life,

you can do some really stupid things.

When your brain screams out it's wrong,

but you do it anyway.

- He's gonna do it!

- Nobody's ever ridden the Zig Zag before!

- Don't be an idiot, Leonard.

You'll never survive!

- Have fun breaking your neck!

- Loser!

- Like the day I decided to impersonate

a crash test dummy on top of Zig Zag Hill.

325 metres of bone-breaking, skin-scraping bitumen.

Yup, stupid.

'Cause things have been normal enough lately.

- Given the current temperature,

we've got 11 minutes and 30 seconds

before the chocolate chip ice cream

turns into chocolate mousse.

- Right you are, son.

With you in a jiffy.

- [Lockie Voiceover] Meanwhile, I was being all mature

and responsible, and stayed home to do the housework.

I vacuumed,

with a machine that blew more dust than it sucked.

I did the ironing,

being extra careful with Sarge's police shirts.

I managed to feed Blob

while dodging projectiles of Blob vomit,

most of the time.

I changed Blob's nappy, and ten minutes later,

changed her again.

I even tried to make Mum's all-time favourite breakfast.

Strange, how pancakes defy gravity.

Yup, I was busier than I'd ever been.

All on account of Mum not feeling too well.

She was having one of her polka dot days.

- Extra crispy toast?

My all-time favourite breakfast.

- I scraped most of the burnt bits off.

- Thank you, Sweetheart.

- [Lockie Voiceover] Mum called them her polka dot days

because they were the days she felt a bit dotty.

Okay, bad joke,

but it was her way of trying to stop us from worrying.

But she'd had more polka dot days than usual

since arriving in Angelus.

Like the day she tried to kill the big pine tree

by belting it with a hammer.

- I read if you threaten them, they die.

- [Lockie Voiceover] Or the time she tried

to tune into the universe via the television.

- That's radiation from outer space,

some of it from the Big Bang itself.

Do you understand?

- [Lockie Voiceover] And then

there was the phone call to the Easter Bunny.

- I'm just ringing to let you know

that the Leonard family will be cancelling Easter this year

until they sort out the problem

with their broken down, useless washing machine!

- [Lockie Voiceover] The way I figured it,

Mum was a bit like Freda the Volvo.

Every now and then, Mum didn't fire on all cylinders.

And she needed a bit of a tune-up

to get back on the road.

- Beautiful day for it.

[Lockie Voiceover] A day's rest in bed

usually did the trick,

but this time, something was different.

- Special treat time.

Your favourite story!

- I'm 13.

I haven't read Pelican Dan since I was five.

- 13 and all grown up with a lovely girlfriend.

- Vicki and I broke up.

I told you that, remember?

- These are the things that make us stronger.

- That'll be the spin dry.

Better hang the laundry out.

- We can read this later.

- [Lockie Voiceover] As it turned out,

I wasn't the only one concerned about Mum.

Phillip had wet the bed during the night,

a sure sign he was worried too.

- Thank you.

Had a bit of trouble with the Volvo.

Mr. Streeton was kind enough

to give us a lift home with the groceries.

- Where's Freda now?

- At the car yard,

in the capable hands of my mechanic.

- How's Vicki, Mr. Streeton?

- [Leonard Voicerover] Even though Vicki and I

had broken up,

the question was out before I could stop it.

- Vicki? Oh, couldn't be better.

Powering on all cylinders.

- Great! All cylinders.

Excellent.

- Is breakfast ready?

I'm starving!

- Phillip, you're leaking.

- It used to be chocolate chip.

- I've just cleaned the kitchen floor.

- I hope we're having pancakes.

- We're having toast.

Extra crispy!

- [Lockie Voiceover] Turned out,

Mum and I weren't the only ones

having a bad start to the day.

Mr. Streeton had decided it was time for Vicki

to learn the meaning of hard work.

- Chocolate chip, I'd say, courtesy of the Leonards.

If there wasn't a new car in it,

I woulda let 'em walk.

- Your old heart, Dad.

- And after school you can start

cleaning the new models down at the car yard.

- But I've got homework to do after school.

- Which should've been finished this morning.

It's time you realise, kitten,

money does not grow on a money tree.

It grows on a hard work tree,

which grows right alongside the tree of responsibility.

And you can wipe that expression off your face.

- [Lockie Voiceover] Meanwhile,

I was busy getting Blob ready.

Sarge was taking her to work

on account of Mum being sick.

Clean nappies, baby formula, wet ones, baby powder,

rash cream, skin cream, teething ring, rusks,

- Philip, hurry up!

- [Lockie Voiceover] And some yummy creamed corn.

That ought to do it!

- As soon as Snowy's over his flu,

I'll be able to spend a bit more time with you.

- I'm gonna be fine, Sarge.

It's not gonna beat me.

- Okay, well you just get all the rest you need.

Bye love.

You boys be alright?

- Fine Sarge.

Phillip, will you hurry up?

We have to get to school.

- It's for my science project, at school.

Mould and fungus.

What's wrong with Mum?

- Nothing.

Nothing's wrong with her.

Don't forget your sandwiches.

- Right, have I got everything?

Baby bag, lunch, files I haven't read yet,

files I don't intend to read, miscellaneous files,

yes good!

Okay.

Bye champions.

- Sarge.

Aren't you forgetting something?

- Oh, yes.

Constable Blob!

- [Lockie Voiceover] Sarge was doing his best to stay calm,

but I could tell he was worried.

- Alright, and Lockie?

Nice work ironing my shirt.

Top job.

- Is your mum gonna be okay?

Phillip said she's having a dotty day.

- Phillip!

- What?

- Snotty day, not dotty.

Bit of a cold.

You know, cough, full of phlegm.

- [Lockie Voiceover] I don't know why I lied.

Probably because I didn't want anyone knowing

Mum was only firing on two and a half cylinders.

- Hear your mum's missing a spark plug.

- Needs a tune-up!

- Timing's outta whack.

- Got a screw loose.

- Going a bit dotty! (laughing)

- I was gonna ask you a favour,

but maybe it's not a good time.

You've been worried about your mum.

- I'm not worried about Mum.

- You look worried.

- Well I'm not, okay?

- Okay!

You still cut over Vicki?

- Egg, I'm gonna hit you with my skateboard in a minute.

- It's gotta be something.

- You're right.

I am still cut up about Vicki.

But not a word to anyone, okay?

- Man, women.

- So what's the favour?

- There's this rumour going around that Dot likes me.

- So?

- I mean, really likes me.

- It's more than a rumour.

I've heard it from several reliable sources.

- Oh man, I just want to hang out, be mates.

Now I'm gonna have to talk to her.

And I don't know what to say.

But what if I do say something

and the rumours are wrong?

- Anyone ever skate here?

- Are you nuts?

No one's ever skated Zig Zag Hill

without needing an ambulance!

What do you reckon?

About Dot?

- So, Mr. Leonard.

No late note, and my guess is no homework.

Who ate it this time?

Cyril the clever Sheep?

The washing machine?

Errant Baby Blob?

Come on, son.

Surprise me!

- I couldn't do my homework, sir,

because I was doing housework.

'Cause

- [Lockie Voiceover] I couldn't say it.

Because my mum is sick.

I just couldn't.

Because then everyone would know.

Only two and a half cylinders, not the full engine.

- You and Miss Streeton make an excellent pair.

Right, detention.

Both of you!

- I hadn't seen Vicki much

since our disaster at school camp,

but I decided to be mature and responsible

about our breakup.

- Are you okay?

- Yeah, you?

- Haven't seen you around.

- I've been working at the car yard.

Sometimes I wish my parents would just

crawl into a hole and disappear.

- You don't mean that.

- Yeah I do.

- No you don't.

What if something really did happen to them?

- I'd celebrate, probably.

- You don't know anything.

- So what, you know everything about me now do you?

- Mum is gonna get better, isn't she?

- Of course she will, she's a Leonard.

And like Sarge says, us Leonards,

tough as nails.

- Lockie, did you know there's 206 bones in the human body?

And they're all breakable?

- Don't worry.

We'll be okay.

- [Lockie Voiceover] And while I was busy

reassuring Phillip,

Sarge was doing his best to look after Blob.

- Hey, whoa whoa, whoa whoa whoa whoa!

Whoa!

Boys, the reason this piece of concrete

is called a footpath is because it is for the feet,

feet being the plural of foot.

If it were for bicycles, it would be called a bicycle path.

What if you'd hit Mrs. Jones here and broken a bone or 10?

Mrs. Jones.

- Sorry, Mrs. Jones.

- What do you think, Constable Blob?

Should we let 'em off with a warning, just this once?

- Oh, yuck!

Oh, gross.

- [Lockie Voiceover] Blob had become a real good shot,

and she loved to practise every chance she got.

Later that night, after Dr. Wallace came to visit Mum,

Sarge sat us down for a chat.

- The doctor says Mum has got this illness

called depression,

which is where you're sad and worried

and worn out, all cooked up together.

And no matter how hard you try,

you just can't be happy.

- She will get better though, won't she?

- Oh yeah, yeah, of course she will.

She's a Leonard.

Tough as nails.

But she's gonna need all our love and understanding.

Okay?

- Okay.

- [Lockie Voiceover] It was Sarge's way of asking me

to keep being mature and responsible.

- Phillip, your bag goes in your room!

And you didn't eat your sandwich.

- Because the idea of a sandwich, Lockie,

is that you're supposed to shove something

between the bread.

- Well maybe if you'd done the shopping properly.

- Yucky nappy coming through, make way, big jobs.

Do not give Blob creamed corn, okay?

Big mistake!

- Lockie, what's for dinner?

- It was gonna be corn.

- [Lockie Voiceover] The next day,

Mr. Streeton delivered the bad news to Sarge.

- Sergeant, you got a minute?

Gear box, head gasket, carburater, points,

distributor, diff, radiator, and thermostat.

All dodgy.

- Not good then.

- Not good, there's not much we can do for her.

The good news is, I got plenty of tempting specials

and an arm that's easy to twist. (laughing)

- [Lockie Voiceover] But Sarge wasn't about

to give up on Freda just yet.

- G'day!

Freda's home!

Well, thanks for that.

- No problem, Sarge.

- Yeah, I owe it to the old girl to give it one last try.

- Yeah look, if you don't have any luck resurrecting her,

we've got some terrific new arrivals in stock.

- [Lockie Voiceover] Remember, mature and responsible.

- How's your mum?

Phillip said she's sick.

- Phillip's got a big mouth.

She's fine.

What else did he tell you?

- [Lockie Voiceover] Please, not about being cut up

over our bust up.

- Nothing important.

- [Lockie Voiceover] What does that mean?

Did he tell her, or didn't he?

- I've gotta get dinner started.

- You can't cook.

- I know.

- I could write you a recipe if you'd like.

- [Lockie Voiceover] Oh man, Phillip did tell her!

He's going to be sorry.

And while Vicki scribbled down her recipe

for spaghetti marinara,

and Mr. Streeton tried to change Sarge's mind,

Egg was gearing up for his big talk with Dot.

- Jeffrey!

- What's all this?

- A surprise for Dot!

No harm in making a good impression.

- Dad, wrong!

This says everything I don't want to say.

- Oh man!

I've stuffed up, haven't I?

- No, Dad, you haven't.

Truly, it's a nice thing to do.

I'm just stressing about what to say to Dot.

- Ah, well

the great thing about food,

never speak with your mouth full.

So if you run out of things to say,

all you gotta do is eat and smile.

- Thanks, Dad.

That's a great help.

- Hi.

- Hi.

- Dot, hey.

Welcome.

I'm Jeff's dad, but you can call me Rev.

Come on in!

Jeff's been cooking up a storm.

Haven't you, son?

Just flamed prawns, sa-lo sauce,

rice, and salad.

Impressive, aye?

- Dad.

- Right, sorry.

Time to make myself scarce.

Big sermon to finish.

- Hungry?

- Starving.

But there's something I've gotta tell you first.

- There is?

- I'm allergic.

- What?

- To prawns.

And peanuts.

They make me blow up like a balloon!

- You're allergic to the food?

- Sorry.

- Is that all?

There's nothing else you wanna tell me?

- Coming through!

Sorry, my sermon.

Everything okay? Good?

Well I'll just, go.

- Is your dad alright?

- Been a bit weird since Mum left.

- That sucks.

You okay?

Reckon I'm gonna stay single forever.

That way, no complications.

- Can you eat pizza?

- [Lockie Voiceover] Egg had been worrying about nothing.

Dot wasn't interested in him.

His music collection though, that was another story.

- You're so lucky I'm being mature and responsible.

Otherwise you'd be head first into the washing machine.

- What did I do?

- You told Vicki I was cut up over her!

- You said you were!

- I only said that because I didn't want everyone

to know Mum's sick!

- Why not?

- Because they wouldn't understand.

They think she's

- Dotty. I am going completely dotty.

Can't find my other night bag anywhere.

I need it for hospital.

- Hospital?

- I had a word to Dr. Wallace

and we've decided it's for the best.

Well, I've gotta get on top of this thing

before it gets on top of me.

Oh, sweethearts!

It's okay.

Hospital is the best place for me right now.

- [Lockie Voiceover] Mum tried to explain

how she needed help, and they'd take good care of her,

and that she'd get better sooner

and we'd be able to visit her every day.

And that we had to look after one another.

And this is where we began:

me, being everything but mature and responsible.

The crash test dummy on top of Zig Zag Hill.

- We never talked you into this, right?

- And it's not our fault if you end up with 15 broken bones.

- Make sure your father knows that.

- Yeah, and Constable Blob.

- Idiot!

- [Lockie Voiceover] I'm not sure why I did it.

Maybe because I wanted things

to be back the way they were.

To be a kid again, Lockie Leonard, human torpedo.

I wanted Mum to be well again.

It's probably better you don't see the next bit.

Not on the bone-breaking bitumen.

So here's something else to look at.

Ahhh!

(crowd gasps)

And that's when I realised, right then and there,

that we all need a helping hand now and then.

And there's no shame in asking for it.

- [Lockie] Help! (groans)

- That was the stupidest act you've ever pulled

- Mum's going into hospital.

She's got depression!

- [Lockie Voiceover] There, I'd said it.

I yelled it from the treetops, and it felt good.

- You could've broken your neck.

- Can you please help me down?

- [Lockie Voiceover] The future didn't look

so worrying anymore.

(engine running)

(cheering and laughing)

- Yes! Yes!

- [Lockie Voiceover] And that night,

us Leonards all had dinner together.

Egg had brought 'round leftovers that Dot couldn't eat,

so we had Rev's saute prawns, and my spaghetti marinara.

Even Mum joined in.

- What's that, Constable Blob?

If you catch anyone skateboarding down Zig Zag Hill again

you'll throw the book at them?

Ooh!

- [Lockie Voiceover] And just then,

the weirdest thing happened.

- It's raining pancakes!

- And that night, Mum kept her promise

and read me my favourite story.

- And so Peli-can Dan slowly opened

the squeaky, creaky cupboard door.

But the cupboard was so dusty,

Peli-can Dan let out his biggest, dustiest sneeze!

- Achoo! (laughing)

- [Lockie Voiceover] I didn't want Mum to go to hospital,

but if it meant she'd get better faster,

then I guess it was okay.

♫ Boy is breaking

♫ Underneath the wave of strain

♫ Worlds away from anyone

♫ They were burning themselves out in the sun

♫ Worlds away from anyone

♫ They were burning themselves out in the sun

♫ It was just enough to keep them all away