Original subtitles

THE PROF KNOWS MUSIC

Professor Busatti, a moment.

I do not know how to thank you. You completely healed me.

- I do not know how to thank you. - I only did my job.

Thank you. Thank you, professor. I feel so much better.

You are like a father to me! Dad!

My wonderful daddy in sugar! Kiss me, daddy!

- How beautiful you are! - Commanding officer! Commanding officer!

Commander, you are expected at the Ministry for the press conference.

- Come with me. - You are the best! The best!!

- Bye, daddy! - Come.

- I saw again! - You're welcome.

Goodbye, dad!

Amedeo, my wife finally decided not to rent the apartment anymore?

- No, she rented it. - Well... we'll see that!

Why is he mad at me?

- No way! - No need to insist!

You already have the clinic. You do not need a consulting room here.

You know that your patients horrify me. They are all so unhealthy.

I rented the apartment to avoid such unpleasant encounters.

- To whom did you rent it? - Someone from Milan, by the agency.

- She's a pianist. - A pianist? A slut without pennies!

And that with what happened this morning,...

... after working all night. What do I have to do?

- To hear a serenade? - If that can comfort you...

... I spend the night alone while you're having fun!

Do not forget that the work of a doctor is a mission!

I can not remember when this bed was used for anything other than sleeping!

- Chao, mom! - Chao! I spoke with your father.

- Yes, I mean. Chao! "I do not think you should talk that way in front of him.

What about you? At least when you were porter,

from time to time, you remembered that you were a man. Chao.

- Hello! - Call me, do not leave me in anguish.

But my office is 100m from here. Chao, my love.

Forward, walk!

One. Two! One. Two! Right, right!

One. Two! One. Two! One. Two! One. Two!

- Hello Elvira! - Hello, Colonel!

I thought they had canceled the national holiday parade.

- Amedeo! - At your orders, Colonel.

To your pleasure. Ras did not fail yesterday.

Do not worry, I gave them mozzarella today.

- He'll barely get out. - Understood, Ras... defecation!

Idiot idiot! Instead of messing up the passage with these filthy beasts,

you could not go through the garden?

No, if not with whom would you let off steam?

To whom would you say it, fool idiot? Colonel? Forward!

Defecation!

Why do not you walk them sometimes?

- Dad, I'm a playboy! - No, you're a sore!

Meow! Meow!

What are you doing, do not shoot! Dirty dogs, do not run!

Stop!

Come on, they are only four!

Mamma mia, an obstacle!

Go!

Penalty! Penalty! Blocks the ball!

Cuckold is going!

Goal!

Goal... This ass!

No, you confuse the ass with the class, you. Come on, let's play!

No, I said, "Look at this ass"

What is good!

Hello, Marinotti residence. Who is speaking?

- It's me, my darling... Luisa. - Oh my God! Why are you calling me here?

I have called you 3 times at your office since yesterday. I was worried.

- How do you feel? - I'm fine.

Who is it?

It's the vice-president in person.

- Is your mother here? - My mother?

- You told me you lived with your mom. - Yes, it's true.

- How is she? - Who?

Your mother! She had not had a heart attack?

She does not have it anymore, it's stationary, it's okay, it's coming.

- Say hello to him for me. - Yes, I'll tell him.

- You have the greetings of the vice-mama's mother. - But I do not know him.

- A mother, always a mother. - But, Ferdinando...

I arrive!

- Now? - No, in a little while! Call me at the office.

Oh my God! Oh my God!

- Guys, she's heading to our house! - I have an idea!

- It's unusual. - Where is he going?

Hello, there is no concierge?

I am the junior concierge!

This is where he has an apartment for rent?

It's here, if it has not already been rented.

Anyway, follow me, I accompany you to the owner.

No, my dear... I accompany you, here it is at home.

- I'm taking your luggage. - Thank you.

- Go for it. - I beg you.

- Take the luggage. - What? Well, Roberto, you're big and strong.

Come on, let's go!

This way.

- And me? - No, take the stairs. You need to lose weight.

Let's go!

You're welcome...

Hello?

Gina, Teresa... The door!

Door fucking!

everyone is dead? Where are they all?

I have to open the door when I sleep! Who is it?

Dad, open it! There is a lady for the apartment to rent.

What can it do? It is rented to a piano porfessor.

it's me, Luisa De Dominicis.

I dream!

Just a minute!

- Here I am. Not too expected? - Fregoli would not have done better.

You are too kind! In my job...

... speed is essential.

- Are you a journalist? - No, surgeon.

Come, I'll show you... your apartment.

It's on the same floor.

Excuse the eventual disorder.

- Small, but with comfort ride. - It's very charming.

- Thank you. - I love. The cuissine is very nice.

I'm glad you like it.

- There is a terrace? - Yes.

- Can I see her? - Of course.

- What a beautiful sunny terrace... What a beautiful view! - That's what I think!

I have always wanted an apartment with a terrace.

20,000, 20,000, 20,000...

- What could it be? - I do not know?

- Still, 20,000. - You realize...

- 20,000 pass! - Duilio, What a culo, he has a discount!

Only 15,000!

What a beautiful big wardrobe, It is very important for a woman.

I know, my wife only talks about that. So, do you play the piano?

Yes! But you say it as if it came from Mars.

It's a job like any other.

- In Milan I had too much pupil. - Really?

Yes! Surroundings... 12 or 13 a day!

I am sure that here you will quickly have a large clientele.

- The phone works? - Yes of course.

Did you see how she looks preoccupied?

Fortunately because to install it would require a heritage and the entire city.

There is one at the head of the bed and the other in the kitchen.

If this monster bothers you, I return it to the zoo. Roar....!

No, I like wild beasts.

- I feel more protected. - Thank God!

To be honest, I do not think of a more pleasant apartment.

It is lovely and comfortable.

It is with great pleasure that I will be your tenant.

I'm happy and it's an honor to have a tenant like you.

We will not disturb you any longer. Guys!

What?

- Goodbye. - Goodbye, I'll take you home.

- Goodbye. - See you soon. - Goodbye. - See you soon.

- Yes? The advised Bonci Marinotti. - It's me, Luisa.

Ah! One moment!

Take this. The rest I will sign later. Go.

- So what? - It looks like it does not make me happy to hear me.

No! I'm still a little upset when you called me this morning!

You called me in the middle... a consultation with my mother.

- Excuse me, I did not know. - It does not matter, do not worry.

- How are you, far away in Milan? - I'm in Lucca!

Oh my God!

In Lucca? What are you doing here? Are you in transit?

No, I'm not passing by, my love. I came to live here.

- And how will you do it? - As I have always done.

Yes, of course, at first it will be a bit difficult,...

... I will make myself known and excercre my job as in Milan...

- You will not have to talk to me. - That's not what I meant, not at all.

- Which hotel are you at? - The hotel? I have my own love nest.

It has a large terrace and a beautiful bed.

Your own nest, with a bed. I really do not know what to say.

- And even if I knew it, I would not say anything. - Honey, what's happening to you?

- You seem terrified. - No no! Not terrified. I am agitated.

Just because I love you.

- I'm all excited because I love you. - Where are we?

- I do not know! - On the little square of the church?

Okay, I take a taxi. Well spur I will recognize your car. Chao.

Chao. What ardent nature!

Just arrived and the whole country is on fire!

I work from morning to evening...

-... while your thugs are not crazy about the day - be careful!

- You're going to rap your finger to finish! - Hi, so we eat?

Hello! Welcome, Highness.

- We prepared the meal for you. - That is true?

- I hate waiting at mealtime! This is the last time! - Sorry, daddy!

- Where were you? - I accompanied the tenant, the teacher.

- Oh yes? - Take your egg before your plate of pasta.

- Thanks Mom! - Eat your egg. I have two words to say to him!

- Sit down. - Yes.

- Tell me your story. - The new tenant is a real jewel!

- Who is the happy owner? - All, dad, all!

- Shit, are you going to let me drink? - Exactly!

What exactly?

- Hello. - Yes?

- I speak with my son andouille? - Yes.

What is this thing? Do you take me for an idiot?

- The new tenant is a call girl. - What are you saying?

It's a whore!

- Depraved! - For once I have good news!

- What's good news? - There is an increase of 20,000 for concierges.

- But at the end of 1985, only. - Ha! You talk about a case.

You have not yet eat your mother's egg?

- Mingle it! - Manges, and you'll be as handsome as your dad.

Shut up, you'll give him the complex.

Eat your egg to become a big boy.

But it disgusts me! It comes out of the ass!

Do not say big words!

- It's okay, shit! - We do not answer like that to his mother!

- Stop mistreating her. - That'll teach you!

Show respect to your father!

More pasta with eggs.

- Hold. - Thank you.

But where is he?

Luisa, I'm here!

- Hello my treasure! - Come on, come quickly!

What do you hide in the car?

Monte, in silence. Quick, do not be seen.

- Do you do counterintelligence? - Yes.

- Make fun of me! - My love!

I play my election at the town hall.

- Let's make love, darling! - No, not that.

- Make love. - We can not be seen by colleagues!

I based my entire campaign on the defense of morality.

- Then present me to your mother. - What, are you kidding?

The slightest emotion could be fatal to him.

- As soon as she gets better, we'll see. - What disillusionment.

You were so warm in Milan. I think I made a mistake while coming here.

Yes, it was a big mistake.

Silence! Someone comes!

A truck from the pound! They are vigilant!

Bend down!

It is the car of our advised. Bravo, huh?

Remove it. All the same, beautiful speeches and then...

And to say that it was I who wanted to make this place a pedestrian zone.

Let me do.

We will do like paratroopers. You open the door and you jump.

Do not be afraid, I'm here. I'll meet you at your house tonight. Are you ready?

- Yes. - Go ahead... Go!

- My God, what is that? - Excuse me.

It's a pleasure and if you want to start again, it's not a refusal.

Now to you, Marinotti Ferdinando.

Serve the buttocks and jump!

Oh... the pain!

- Councilor Marinotti, what are you doing here? - Counterintelligence!

- Will it work? - You laugh?

This hole will correspond exactly to the right eye of the tiger, I made my calculations.

- Shit! - That's calculating?

I must have made a mistake!

Quickly, plug this hole! Otherwise the whole house will be flooded!

- Stop it! - Do not worry, I'll fix it.

Here!

You speak of a shower!

- Now what are we doing? - We can try the left eye.

- By avoiding the gas pipes, clever! - Let's hope so!

Hello! The new tenant has arrived?

- Unfortunately it's me who did visit the place. - How is she?

What do you want it to be... It's a tenant.

As soon as I have a moment, I will visit him.

- I have to run to the clinic, an emergency. - Chao!

- Hello doctor. - Are you okay, Amadeo?

- Are you going to the clinic? - To work.

What are you doing today?

- 3 stomach ulcers and 2 ciroses. - Enjoy your meal.

Doctor, you work too much. A little vacation would do you good.

Go to the sea, for example. Let me do it. You're welcome.

You should tan.

I saw that you found a way to distract yourself... When there is gene, there is no pleasure.

- Amedeo, you drank? - We are between man, you can tell me everything.

Modesty aside, I am the concierge.

I quickly realized it. The neighborhood is full! Full!

Full, my dear doctor.

The neighborhood is full of prostitutes! And yes, really!

One night, I counted 8!

It is a particular district, it is the only district of Lucca full of prostitutes.

In front of the house next door, I counted 12. 12, do you believe it?

It seems odd, strange but it is so.

I can tell you... Professor, do you want me to scratch you?

I hope this is not an epidemic!

- I hope so, they are prostitutes! - So, where do they live?

- At home, professor. - At home?

You do not know that the new tenant is a mad mother?

Stopped!

- First we get scratched, then we get angry? - How dare you?

- Okay! - Who told you?

people. The way of the people.

You better keep quiet, if you want to stay! No gossip, it's clear!

"You are not angry, I will be mute like a raffle. - You mean a grave!

- Tombe is tombola in English. - Put a stone on this tombola!

Okay, goodbye.

Stop screaming or I'll shoot you!

- The door! - I said I knocked you out!

- The door! - The door today!

I have my hand in the door!

- What is she doing? - Say it!

Wait. That's it, she's in the shower.

- She takes a shower with her clothes? - No, she's undressed.

She is naked! She naked! Totally naked!

- She naked! - What are you taking, let me see.

- What do you see? - What a beautiful pair!

What beautiful breasts! His thighs! His thighs!

- Wait a minute... soon! - Leave a little for me!

- It's my turn! Clear! - Wait, you'll have your turn!

- Come on, help me...

Look at this pair!

Looks like giant lollipops.

- Disengage. I will use my left eye! - Okay, but you stay on the ground.

Very good look!

I would like to soap it! Why am I not a sponge?

- Go, mouth it! - Mr. Fix-it!

- Quick! - Here we are, I found it.

This is the psychologically favorable moment. I go on the attack.

- What are you going to do? - Do it to me, like!

He is completely crazy!

She's just gorgeous!

I arrive!

- I'm not bothering you? - No, but what do you want?

Nothing... In fact... As I passed...

I thought... It's not easy to say!

I do not bother you, I see you are very busy.

No, say, what is it?

- What? - Delinquent! Dumbass! How do you allow yourself?

Outside, dirty pork!

Who is it?

- Who is it? - It's me, your big cat!

Who is this wild beast?

I offended you?

I succeeded! I managed to come without being seen.

- Not even the porter. - You exaggerate! We are free.

You no doubt, me no, alas.

Try to understand? If you ask who I am, I'm your brother.

- I do not understand. It's ridiculous. - I know, but still have a little patience.

Everything will work out, you'll see. Ah! The treasure of the Incas!

But you did not even kiss me.

I do not know why but I have a funny feeling.

As if we were being watched.

My adored, my brioche, all buttered!

Give me a kiss.

What are you waiting for to hug me? You wanted to see me, huh?

Did you want to? Me more... Always more!

Let me see! Gold! It's gold!

This tiger embarrasses me.

He has the eyes of the investigating judge.

Impossible, Ferdinando, Leave that tiger where he is!

- And think of me a little! - Yes my love.

- Yes, come on the bed. - Yes. - What are they doing?

She takes off her bathrobe and she goes to bed!

- Come on the bed! - Yes I'm coming.

- Remove everything, I'll kill you with pleasure! - Oh yes!

Help me to take off my pants. Quick... my pants!

Help me. To open the treasure!

Atention! You tear off the button.

- Yes! Its good! - Ahhhh...!

- Who is it? - What can it do, serve me hard!

- Who is it - It's Mrs. Busatti.

I brought you food, you are not yet organized.

The owner!

- I have to go off. - Yes, short!

- My shoes! - Here, quickly!

- Your pants are on the ground. I arrive! - You come? I did not even have a handjob!

I put on a bathrobe and I am yours.

- I'm going to the closet. - No no! not the closet.

- On the terrace. - I'm going on the terrace.

- Quick. - On the terrace.

Your shoes, look!

I'm coming, ma'am.

I hope I not disturbing you?

Whatever you imagine, nothing happens at home.

My mair phoned me from the clinic. He will return later than expected.

Another very urgent case.

It's still these cats in heat. Cats are real pig,...

... They spend the day lying on the couch and at night they will flirt on the terrace.

- Let's go see what they do. - No, Mrs. Busatti, not on the terrace.

Cats are my friends, they will keep me company.

- Okay, I'll come later to get the tray. - Thank you.

- Eat... Do not throw anything away. - Do not worry. Good evening, Mrs. Busatti.

Finally.

- Madonna! - No!

- Who is it? - It's me, Dr. Busatti.

- I enter, it is better to avoid being seen. - Listen, I...

- I went to bed. - All alone?

- With whom? I am alone. - Oh my God!

Do not be sad.

Who could come tonight?

Just me.

- He does not care, huh, dad? - I brought you a gift.

- You like? - You are charming.

I had to run to the clinic, I would have liked to welcome you otherwise.

But no, please.

It is already midnight, I must return, otherwise how I will explain to my wife.

- Thank you. - A girl like you,

with everything you know how to do...

- Who is it? - Mrs. Busatti.

Where can I hide? It's my wife. Closet...

No, not the closet.

- No, not in there. - Where am I going?

Under the bed.

- Under the bed! - No... get out of here!

- The terrace! - No.

My God, what not to do!

You have some fire?

Goodbye, it makes me happy to have you as a neighbor.

- I am delighted about it. - What a pleasure... a great pleasure. See you soon.

The maniac!

Poor boy!

Look at this idiot, look.

Calm down!

Where am I?

Bastard!

Big disgusting!

- I wanted to tell you... - Outside!

Good night.

- Stop here. - Watch out, guys! They bring a piano.

- Concierge? - At your service.

- Excuse me, Mrs. De Dominicis? - Ah, the piano?

In the 8th. Who goes piano sano.

In the 8th, they all live in the 8th. not one for the first floor.

- Come on, let's go. - It's his piano.

- Hey, playboy. Come here. - Yes Dad?

It's not logical this story, If it does the kind of exercise you say...

... she should not teach the piano but rather the flute with bells.

She does that to hide her real activity.

Damn it, I did not think about that. Sometimes you are smart.

- I inherited it from mom. - Whom, fool?

I inherited it from mom.

I guess I inherited it from dad?

Roberto, come to your table, your father is waiting. Go.

I am coming right now.

That leaves you, friends.

For all the operations of the day, I demand...

... I repeat, I demand maximum punctuality, Little C...!

Punctuality is synonymous with discipline.

- And discipline is the secret of punctuality. - Bravo.

I see you know it, so you have to show it in your actions, you moron!

You have to come for dinner on time, especially when we have a guest.

He's not a guest, he's always here.

That's right, however he enjoys my esteem and my unconditional confidence,...

-... so you owe him the respect. do it! - All my repsects.

Bravo, it's better. So at the table!

Execution!

Forward...

... walking, one, two...

- There it is, thanks. - Goodbye, ma'am.

- Thank you. - Goodbye ma'am.

- Ah, it's you. - Am I bothering you?

No, you can enter if you want.

- Thank you. - Do you like music?

Yes a lot.

in fact, I came to bother you, to talk to you.

Tell me, I'm listening.

- That's... You... - So... ?

So nothing. I forgot It's stupid.

do not diets that. It happens to me too, especially for the important things.

- Yes, me too, For that I forgot. - It will be for next time.

- Excuse me, the phone. - Yes.

Hello?

Hello my love, I will not be able to come today. I have an appointment with the prefect...

... at the Institute of Sisters of Bernardone for electoral propaganda.

- Its very important. - I see. You can not free yourself as always.

What should I do? rEster at home, wait until you phone,...

... to tell me that you can not come?

That's it, goodbye! Dumbass!

What are you doing? Are you leaving, Marcello?

You were on the phone, I left you alone.

- No. What if we went for a ride? - Of course.

"For a healthy family, in a healthy society." What do you think?

That's good, but I do not like your picture. You do not look well.

What do you mean? You're right, we'll put another picture.

- Counselor, Colonel Marullo wishes to speak to you. - Oh, the beard!

- Dear counselor. - Dear Colonel.

- Excuse me, I have it for 2 minutes. - Good.

We need to agree about student visits...

... at the barracks for the feast of the republic.

Ah, I agree.

Because I too consider it absolutely indispensable...

... the recovery of baffled values,...

... in a moment of serious obcurantism like this,...

... that youth is finally encouraged to appreciate the high quality of moral values...

... and the living and ardent forces of rebirth are contained in the words Fatherland and Discipline.

It's amazing, damn!

Not at all, there is nothing extraordinary.

I try to be clear and I try to express myself with the greatest simplicity.

All your efforts will be well rewarded. You will be the new Mayor... Everyone says it!

You must defeat the elections, shit!

The Madonna, the Madonna is my witness, I do not require anything.

... I have times in the will of the people.

That said I would need the advice of a smart person, look at this.

What do you think of this poster, Colonel?

Come.

Imagine the whole covered place of these posters?

- Can you imagine the effect it will have? - Say, she is superb!

It's just a poster, so do not overdo it.

You're kidding, she's fantastic you did not look at her well.

Without exaggerating, I have not seen anything like it.

She's one of my neighbors. A news.

Yes, I recognize it.

She rented an apartment in my building.

-I will come to visit you, Colonel. - A fucking good rookie.

She is from Milan! I always said, Milanese are very good people,...

... workers, full of ideas.

This beauty is perhaps the prototype of a new production,...

... you imagine, thousands like this one.

Quellz class, have you seen those legs?

A law should be created that prevents young girls from sitting on a motorcycle in a skirt.

Keep this speech for elections, it would be better to have a law that requires them.

Happy the one who feels it.

Whoever feels it is the young Don Juan who brings him motorcycle.

What is he feeling? This bitch. Is it his little brother or his cousin?

Little cousins should not be too sure, they have these arguments

No fears. This young man is the son of a reformed man.

Dr. Busatti. You can believe me, it's a friend of mine.

But, that does not interest me.

- Who is it? - Who?

This idiot with his bike with whom you paraded.

It's the owner's son.

- He showed me around the city. You are jealous? - Jealous? From him?

A moron? A man like me, soon mayor?

Yes, I am jealous, and I find it indecent that you mop with a young boy at the first opportunity.

And I wanted to see you know that I'm alive and that it's not just elections in life.

Elections are important, my little mouse, and that's why I can not be with you.

To me that you take me dinner tonight, I want to go out with you.

Tonight? But with this piano, Like the beautiful days in Milan,...

... when you played the rhapsody. Play for me.

I do not want to play. The piano is not going to run away, you know?

No, it would not be here if you leave. Before you leave, play this rhapsody.

Play this rhapsody that drives me crazy.

This rhapsody... plays this rhapsody.

- Play it... Play this rhapsody. - No.

I want to hear my love. I want to hear it.

Let me take off your bathrobe, sweetheart... Gently... Like that... That's it.

Let me take it from you, slip from your alabaster shoulders...

Play it for me, my love.

Play for me.

Play, play...

I love that...

Let me let you breathe.

It rises quickly, sounds, sounds...

Hi Hi.

Yes... Play, play... Pednant that I admire.

As you play well.

You play so well. What music! What music!!

Hello!

Wonderful! The mama did you well.

Say 33, doctor... Keep playing.

To attack!

That's enough, shit! Species of shameless.

Soldier, we must do this little bitch, I'll ring the bells.

- What's the matter? - Do not you hear? I'm going to ring the bells.

So go...

I'm boiling! Come on. Come on...

Well, I'm all boiling... Everything.

"We're friends, find me someone who wants to learn piano."

Idiot!

Who is it? But is it a meeting place here?

So there it is.

Wait, I'll see.

- Holy Madonna, it's him! - Who is he?

Open the door!

- I am Colonel Marullo. - He came for counterintelligence?

- What is he saying? - Open the door, shit, or I push the door.

I am coming right now. He lives here.

- Quick, in the wardrobe. - How is it possible! It's like in movies.

- What's the matter? - Let him go, I must be back before 1am.

- Quick. - Closed.

Instantly, shit.

- Good evening! - Good evening!

I want to inform you that under the law on public health,...

... It is forbidden to...

- What do you mean? - Me? Nothing.

I was saying... You were playing the piano?

Unfortunately yes. I know it's late...

On the contrary, you play divinely,...

... and I love hearing Rossini's music.

- In fact, it was Beethoven. - Beethoven? A stranger?

I meant it was very beautiful.

Not to compliment you, but what a touch.

- Ah... a nice touch... bidibidibi. - Thank you.

You are a smart girl, an artist,...

... instead my daughter Grace... engaged with a major.

He's a good guy, with a good career, but he loses time procrastinating...

... and she does nothing to encourage her.

if at least she could play the piano...

- If only that, can give lessons. - Really?

- Of course! - Would you do that? That's wonderful!

- See you tomorrow. - Thank you.

Oh my God!

She screams with pain! Would she like me?

Do not cry like that!

Oh God! Oh God! Oh God! It's almost an hour. My f...

My mom... My mom is going to be worried.

Why do not you think about her and your elections?

-... And I'm nothing for you? - Shut up, my little mouse.

This is not true. A little patience and you'll see.

The fact is that... Shut up!

It's dangerous, we have to be careful. If I can, I'll call you tomorrow.

- I call you. - Do not call me anymore, Batard!

My God.................

Well done!

- Who will open? - Who's the job? I must be there for that!

- Hello Madam. - Hello Miss Luisa.

- Marcello is out? - No, he gets dressed, why?

He promised to show me the city.

Marcello!

- Marcello! - Yes mom.

Miss Luisa is here. She says you have to go out together.

Yes, tell him I'm coming.

- Do you like Lucca? - Yes, it's splendid.

Stop talking to me, we are friends.

As you like, whatever you want.

We arrived. I stop here as requested.

- Why this tone? You're in a bad mood? - Yes.

- No I do not know. - You're a funny boy!

Sometimes you are angry with me, and sometimes...

And sometimes, on the contrary?

- I think you're in love with me. - Listen? It's a big word!

I'm not good for you, you have too many distractions...

... No feelings, you just have to laugh.

It's your imagination, or...

-... you are still too young. - And you're a whore.

- Hello? - Hello, it's me.

You, finally. When do you arrive?

- Unfortunately I have a meeting, I can not. - All of a sudden?

Try to understand, they warned me at the last moment, just now.

The prefect will be there, I can not give up.

It makes me sick not to go out with you.

If I'm free, will I visit you later?

Honey, are you ready? We must go.

Leave it alone. Do not bother. Apparently you do not miss company.

He thinks what this moron, call me Penelope?

Go to hell!

Miss!

- What a good surprise! - Good evening, doctor.

Where are you going alone at this time of night?

I thought of eating outside, but I do not know the city at night.

We are poor provincials. But there is a good restaurant.

- If I could invite you... - You can, you can!

- Please, come on. - Thank you.

- Sit down. - Thank you.

Liar, hypocrite! She does not even respect my father,...

... but I know where he takes her. First dinner late and then the rest.

This time I'll get you.

Please, sir, a Branca Fernet for me,

and a Branca Fernet for the lady.

- Does it really help to digest? - In any case, it does not hurt.

- Do you like the place? - It looks nice. - I am delighted.

Excuse me but I have to call the hospital.

If you talk to your wife, can you tell her to join us?

Well good... It was a good thing!

- What would you like, Miss? - A tonic, please.

Right away, ma'am.

- Yes? - Hello, Teresa, it's me. - Hello.

- I'll have all night. - You must be in a chic place...

- I hear the sound of cutlery. - Do not laugh, they prepare my instruments.

- Really? it's a difficult, hopeless operation.

Why do not you give him some eggnog with Marsala

I do not understand what you are saying. I'm saying goodnight to you.

Professor Busatti, What a pleasure - my savior!

You here at the restaurant! I would like to introduce my wife Margherita.

- You have to dine with us. - I have to go. - Come, come on.

- I can not, a dying patient. - Calm down.

- I have to go. - Come

Calm down.

It is raining?

Miss, a message for you.

I am sorry to leave you so, but my duty calls me.

I have to run to the bedside of a dying person, your devoted Busatti.

I come here often. It's very good.

- Mr. Counselor. - Good evening.

- Good evening, counselor. - Good evening.

I beg you, sit down, you are very beautiful tonight and very simple.

Thank you, you are very gallant.

- That son of a bitch. - Excuse me, did you say something?

This customer who just sat down, is it the Marinotti Councilor?

- Yes, one of our loyal customers. - And the next one is his mother?

No, it's his wife.

- His wife... Is he married? - He is married and cared for.

She finances all her election campaign. Excuse me madam.

- Hello! - Hello, Marcello, I'm happy to see you.

Really? You're not angry?

What are you saying? It happens to be in a bad mood,...

... and say unpleasant things. Why do not we dine together?

I was furious because you do not take it seriously.

- Me? Of course I take you seriously. - Okay... And why did you leave with my dad?

I saw him when I went out I asked him the name of a restaurant...

... and he brought me here. He went to the hospital to treat these patients.

- I'm really an idiot. - Monsieur joins you for dinner?

- Yes, I would like this table next to the window. - It's my pleasure Madam.

Thank you, let's go.

A millon here, a million there and we arrived at 18!

- Your political career is expensive for me. - My little wolf,...

... You are unjust, be patient, I do all this for you!

It will be a fun evening ..

- That'll teach you. - I recommend Tortellini with cream?

- Yes, tortellini is very good for you too? - Yes.

- And champagne! - It's disgusting!

- It's not disgusting. It is a good wine. - No, it's cork juice.

- Please, ma'am. - Listen to him. He has the brains of a zucchini.

Is there anything that would please you?

- White of white, Principe di Piemonte, very fresh. - It will be good, thank you.

Oh God! Eve the whore!

- Excuse me, it escaped me. - Well, not me, it was spontaneous.

"Come on, we're going away. - Are we leaving so early?

- Everything is going wrong tonight. - Health. - Health.

- We're going back home? - Yes, at home.

What happened?

Nothing, you just drank too much. How do you feel?

- Well... I just have to throw up. - Ah, great.

- Where am I? - Home.

- Where am I? - Home.

Finally, I wanted that so much.

- Do you love me? - Of course I love you.

- So who is this big pig coming here? - What are you saying?

I saw it, you know?

You talk like that because you're drunk.

No, it's because I suffer too much for my age.

I'm going to make coffee.

Little mouse! I'm finally alone, we can talk.

- Where is your wife? - Little mouse, I understand that it's hard...

... discover that I am married. But that does not change anything between us.

- Oh no? - I see my wife so rarely...

-... I do not touch it even more with the fingertips. - I see!

I swear! Do you know that? As soon as I'm elected,...

... I would tell voters to fuck, I divorce and marry you.

- Really? And she, he knows? - I do not need to do that. You know I love you,...

-... I love you I love you! - Ferdinando!

I love you... My dear friends, with a sweet feeling of strength and peace.

Who invades my heart... I love you all. I repeat my speech for the next meeting...

- If I can not do it in the bathroom, where can I? - Understand, hurry up!

Very good.

- It's my fucking wife. - What are you saying?

Whore! Whore of voice that I work. I'm going out as soon as I'm done, ok?

Tchao little mouse I'm coming tomorrow at 10:00?

I understood!

- Amedeo! - Who is it?

- What are you doing? - No... it's the...

What are you talking about?

She... Silence, she's doing Turkish things.

Come, come see!

Incredible, like the Arabian Nights. Look!

It looks like she has four legs.

Holy Mother of God, what an ass! What a view!

She looks like Callifugo's Venus.

- Amedeo, This is the Venus of Callipigia. - Callipigia... Calligufo... So what!

- How dare you? - Excuse me, but I'm not homo.

- That's not the question. - Let me explain to you... Maybe you'll understand.

You are only a young boy, you have not sailed in these waters.

Sex has its own compensation laws.

We have the incentives of the flesh, and they that of the fish.

- It's meat, huh? - Amedeo, you're a pig!

- Good... - Are you a pig, understood?

- Stop watching her! - How? You saw well too!

- Disguting pig! - Do not push me!

- Leave me! - Are you going to stop watching ?!

Have you lost your mind or what?

The next time you try, I'll talk to your wife...

... and gifflera you so hard! - Who allowed you to talk to me?

And remember, a porter in this house is a luxury.

Why are you so pissed off? Your father can tell me that, not you!

A young 20 year old arrives and fucks the fleet a 50 year old?

I am good and dear, and if I had 5 minutes to lose...

... I twist your neck! It's clear?

- Oh, it's you. - I'm sorry for last night.

I wanted to ask you to record this rhapsody,...

-... so I can listen to it. - Okay, I'm recording it to you.

- Thank you. - But not now. I have an appointment.

Yes of course. I wanted to ask one last thing.

Yesterday, when we were together, something happened between us?

- No why? - It would be a shame not to remember.

Yes, really bad.

Hello?

Hello, Luisa, it's me, my love.

Listen, Luisa, shit, I'm out of luck.

At 10 am I receive the election commssion here.

Do not get angry, I'm really in the shit.

It does not surprise me, it is your natural habitat.

I can not come, my love. I call you later.

No! Do not call me. Whatever the reason!

And I do not know if I'll be here, chao!

- Can you take me to town? - Of course!

I left my bike in front of the restaurant...

-... and this morning she was no longer there. - Do not worry, you'll find it.

I would not care if you were my girlfriend.

- Come on, do not do too much! - No, I really think so.

It would be nice if we could always walk around like this.

- You are adorable. - You too.

Since your arrival, even if you make me suffer a little,...

... Life here is much better.

- Everything seems more beautiful. - The Tourist Office will be delighted to hear that.

- Why do not you believe Me? - Luisa!

Excuse me, I'll be back.

My heart, did you understand what I meant tonight?

We will get married and we will be together. You're happy?

- I do not know. - That dirty pig again!

You must believe me. I do not know how to lie. I love you.

I know.

But I will not bear anymore that you pass by motorcycle under my window!

- Why? Noise disturbs you? - No, I'm more embarrassed by his balls!

You, legs in the wind and close to this puppy!

Do not be ridiculous, this boy means nothing to me.

- You love Me? - I came here for you.

So why are you still hanging out with this boy?

You do not understand? To make you jealous.

Make me jealous? Jealous of this little puppy?

- My dear Marinotti! - It's you! Mrs.

One moment, I explain to this lady... It's just there.

You will find the town hall. Including?

The registry office is on the right. There is a small door...

- I'll meet you tonight. Understood, Miss? - Or, thank you.

Goodbye.

- Let's walk together. - To fly.

Now what are you doing? Are you looking for me, huh?

- Who is it? - Love, it's me, your Tarzan.

I open you right away.

My dear adviser! What a nice surprise!

Who told you about my daughter? I tried to call you this morning.

Today is a party for friends, but tomorrow is the big day!

After the wedding, we will have a banquet. I beg you, advise, elevator.

- The groom is not bad. - Congratulations!

I have a meeting...

Grazia! Lucia! Look, this is the counselor Bonci Marinotti!

- Good evening! Good evening! - Counselor, I'm so happy!

- What splendid flowers! - What splendid flowers are they for me?

- Give them to me! - They are not appropriate!

- Let them go! - Counselor, here.

- I have already seen it. - I only think of eating!

- Councilor, a toast. - I really have to go to a meeting.

- You do not know our fish. - No thanks, Colonel, no fish.

- I'll take a sandwich. - I was talking about the groom.

- Captaine Poisson. - My future son-in-law!

- My dear adviser, still flowers? - Ah, it's you!

- I was going... - No, come in!

She is so dear to me...

- Counselor, she will be so happy. - I have to explain to you...

- Counselor, it was not necessary. - How handsome he is!

- It seemed too little. - The first was pretty...

... but I take it too.

Counselor, let me introduce Mr. and Mrs. Busatti.

- Nice to meet you. - Very happy.

We are happy to have the Marinotti advisor tonight.

His presence honors our home.

By the way, did not you invite the piano teacher?

Yes, I have been twice. She has a fever and can not go out.

The poor. She said she did not know how to come. I'm sorry.

Knot head!

With all the men in the world...

... I fell in love with a married mollusk!

- Who is it? - It's me, Busatti.

- Good evening, can I come in? - What do you want?

Marullo told me you had a fever.

- I thought as a doctor... - Come to see me... undress me?

- Sacred, I'm a doctor! - Yes, but you are also a big bawdy.

I see you are in a bad mood. I'm not bothering you. Good evening.

Good night!

All florists are closed. I walked all over the city...

... because everyone knows my car.

What will I find?

I hope she will appreciate the gesture.

- It's your Tarzan, open! - Finally!

Okay, see you tomorrow.

It will be a wonderful wedding!

She must be angry and will not answer.

But Tarzan will succeed to join Jane.

By the garden wall.

Mamma mia, the dogs!

- Hello? - I have a big news my love.

Today, I record a conference for a private television

... and tonight we can watch it in your bed.

I never want to see you again!

Come on, do not say that. You are Jane and I am your Tarzan.

You'll understand everything when I tell you. It will make you laugh.

Something terrible happened to me last night.

- Very interesting. - Alright I understand.

So I come right away and I tell you everything. Ciao, little mouse.

Look! She remembered me.

May be remorse.

- Amedeo, how are you? - Good thanks and you?

- Nice day, how are you? - Good.

You have a beautiful dress. Very convenient. Magnificent.

Little naughty!

Even with this idiot! What a bitch!

- I came to make a confession. - Tell me.

- Do you know Moby? - Who?

Moby Dick, my wife... the whale.

When I make love with my wife...

... it's like Dr. Barnard is transplanting another heart. I make a rejection.

- What does that have to do with me? - On the contrary... And how!

You are beautiful. Not like my wife.

So I said to myself: "My dear Amedeo, go to the Miss."

"She'll comfort you." You understand? Sit.

Do not be shy. I will tell you what I think.

You work hard to feed yourself with your, ah... music.

- Do you like my music? - I'm crazy, Miss.

Especially when you play Betovoli Rhapsody.

- That drives me crazy. I love the 5th. - E the 9th?

Let's not exaggerate. I am 45 years old.

I am active, but I am 45 years old anyway.

- I also like Sebastiano Bacco. - Toccata and Fugue?

I like her touch [toccata], a little less her pussy [figa].

I came to play, so let it go. Listen, Miss...

-... I only have 50,000 to read. - But it's too much.

How could that be too much? Beautiful as you are, you deserve billions!

Are you a beginner?

I sailed a little. I have some experience.

- Do you have a good ear? - I never tried.

- But that's okay. - Do not you think that's going to ruin everything?

But if you like, I do everything: the ear, the nose, the throat!

- All that you want! - Let's do some music theory.

Yes, a little solfege, a little riding,

... A little trial, we throw ourselves on the couch, and... trallalero, trallallà!

- Hi, son. - Hey daddy!

Tell me. You're a playboy, right?

- Yes why? - Is it you who recommended me the whore from above?

- Do you want a hand? - Here's a hand!

- It was only the first. - Do not hit the kid, it's retarding his growth.

- I do not grow, it hits me all the time. - And here is the second.

- And why are you laughing? - It is deserved.

- And one for you! - The important thing in the family is equality.

Flowers...

I'm glad you remember it! your presence is a great honor.

- Mom! - Can we use your car?

We have parents from far away. I do not want to pile them up with us. Thank you!

Come, come! The counselor asks us to take his car.

- Colonel... - Do not worry.

- You're very generous. - I came here for another reason.

Mamma mia!

- All at church! - Long live the bride and groom!

- Who is it? - It's me, Marcello.

- Marcello, you're not at the wedding? - No, do not want.

But I have to talk to you.

- It's impossible, I'm waiting for someone. - This pork, no doubt?

Go away!

Opener. Opens!

Stopped! We have nothing to say to each other, thugs!

Opens!

Opens!

We will see!

Punt e Mes [Italian Vermouth] is the choice in more than 100 countries around the world.

Do not forget! The Nation can be saved...

... if we restore...

... the infinite cells forming the connected fabric,...

... It's the family! The family is the basis of everything.

The family, the nucleus of harmony, the core of love...

... and above all, morality.

If each of us, guarantees to make an effort...

... we can definitely save, this priceless,...

... this incredible heritage of the nation, morality!

What an imbecile! She recorded it. She is not bored.

Marcello, are you crazy? You are not allowed to enter!

- No? So who has the right? - It does not concern you!

Oh no? You've already forgotten, did you say you loved me?

- And these speeches? And this kiss? - It was just nonsense.

- You must forget that. - It was not nonsense, it was lacheté!

You used me to make this pork jealous...

-... and like a moron, I walked! - You said it, that's it!

Bitch!

- Disgusting! - And you, how do you define yourself?

Do you think making holes in the wall makes you different?

- Bastard! - I'm going to kill you.

I'm going and killing, you'll see!

I thought you were my friend!

I'm not going to be a fool any longer!

We visited the city on foot, we kissed!

Coward, say it, speak!

- Leave me... Stop, Marcello!

I'm not finished! Play for me. I want to hear your music!

- undressed! - I do not want!

Come here! Kiss Me!

- Leave me! -I will not leave you, I'm not leaving!

- Now you do what I say! - Marcello!

Standing!

-I hate you! Leave me! - Come here!

No!

No!

I love you.

I love you I love you!

Well played guys.