Original subtitles

See that aspiring model there?

That was me, Deb,

until the day I died.

I thought I'’d go straight to heaven,

but there was a bit of a mix-up

and I woke up in someone else'’s body.

So now, I'’m Jane,

a super-busy lawyer with my very own assistant.

I got a new life, a new wardrobe,

and the only people who know what'’s going on with me

are my girlfriend, Stacy, and my guardian angel, Fred.

I used to think everything happened for a reason.

And, well, I sure hope I was right.

Hi.

I'’d like a double decaf nonfat caramel macchiato.

But instead of caramel, can I get a skosh of vanilla syrup?

Can you make it cold, but not too cold

so it'’s refreshing, but it doesn'’t hurt my teeth?

You'’ve gotta be kidding me.

Excuse me?

Yeah.

Oh, my God. You'’re Jane.

I mean, before I became Jane.

Why am I taller than you?

Because Miss Booty Bounce,

you'’re wearing four-inch heels,

which are impractical,cause lower-back disk compression,

while I am wearing comfortable shoes that don'’t hate women.

Okay. Heh.

Heels create a line, elongating my silhouette.

It is not your silhouette. It'’s mine.

You are walking around in my body,

driving my Porsche, with my bank account.

Look, who gave you the right to take over my life?

Just one moment. It'’s my phone.

Don'’t you dare answer that phone while I'’m talking to you.

Hey, I deserve some respect. Hey.

Oh...

Good morning.

You in the mood for an algae/tofu omelet?

It'’ll make your skin glow and intestines flow.

I'’d rather chew on my briefcase.

But thank you.

So I just had a dream that old Jane was yelling at me.

Jane, we'’re late.

Kind of like that.

Fred. Uh-- You in the mood for an algae/tofu omelet?

That sounds delicious.

But I am already glowing and flowing.

Ah.Jane, I'’ll be in the car.

Stacy, have a great day.

Sweetie, do you know what you just did?

Is this a riddle? I love riddles.

You wiped off your zit cream when Fred came in.

That'’s not a riddle.

You do that when you care about the way you look.

Like when the guy comes to fix the elliptical

I think you broke on purpose.

Is it possible that you like Fred?

What? No.

Fred? Uh-uh.

Fred-- I mean-- He'’s just Fred. Just Fred.

Ahem.

If you say so.

Bye, sweetie.Bye.

No.

So I'’m thinking The Montage in Laguna this weekend?

The sea, the sand and a very attentive manservant?

I like that. I don'’t know. It all depends.

My boss might expect me to work,

seeing as how he just pulled me into another one of his cases.

Your boss did that? What'’s up with that guy?

I need to talk to him.

What was that about?What?

Eileen. She works at a PR firm on the seventh floor.

Oh.

Let me guess. You used to date her.

Yes. Yes, I did.

So, what went wrong?

What do you mean?Why don'’t you talk to her?

Because it'’s over. What is there to say?

Apparently nothing.

What'’s that?A clown.

Good. You see it too.

He was in reception, but Deedee got wigged out,

so she put him in here.

Didn'’t Kim and I reserve the conference room for my 9:00?

You did, but I put your client in your big office.

I didn'’t think you'’d mind.

Bingum, get the clown out of there.

It'’s disruptive.

Why me?

Because, Jane, he'’s your 9:00.

I produce a reality show called The One.

We'’ve been on the air for 11 seasons.

I never miss it.

Unless someone deletes it off my DVR.

I'’m sure it was an accident. Tell me about the program.

Oh. One handsome bachelor chooses his bride-to-be

from 30 desperate hopefuls.

And one of the hopefuls is suing you?

Wendy Simon.No way.

Weeping Wendy?Heh, heh.

This season'’s runner-up.

Everyone thought she was the one.

In the final episode, in a huge upset,

he chose Annabelle. Wendy went to pieces.

Screaming, tears, snot running out of her nose.

I watch in HD. It'’s a total train wreck.

Oh, but fantastic television.

It'’s like watching a nervous breakdown

sponsored by volumizing shampoo.

She'’s suing me for intentional infliction of emotional harm.

A.J., all of your contestants sign release forms, correct?

Yes. Yeah, of course.

I'’ll file a motion to dismiss. We'’ll be done by lunch.

Hello. Heh, heh, heh.

I'’m Jane Bingum.

Evan Robbins. Nice to meet you.

It'’s my pleasure.

It'’s okay.

I thought there might be a buzzer.

I get that a lot.Heh, heh, heh.

So on the phone, you said "wrongful termination,"

but you didn'’t give me any details.

I wanted to make sure you'’d at least meet with me

before saying no.

Okay.

Can I get you something to drink, water or coffee?

No, thank you. It smears the smile.

Of course.

So wrongful termination.

Were you fired from the circus?

Uh-- I'’m a sales account manager for Context Communications,

a mobile service provider.

And why were you let go?

I'’m pretty sure it'’s for dressing like a clown.

Oh. Right.

How long have you been dressing like a clown?

About six months.

Oh. These are my employment records.

My reviews are excellent,

and I'’ve been promoted three times

over the last four years.

Well, that'’s very impressive.

So, why not just stop wearing that?

I don'’t want to.

It says one month before you started wearing that,

you took two weeks off for bereavement.

May I ask why?

Um-- My, uh...

My wife died...

in a car accident.

I'’m sorry.

I appreciate you taking your time.

I don'’t expect you to understand what I'’ve been through.

If you don'’t wanna represent me, it'’s okay.

I didn'’t say that.No, I saw the way

everyone in your office was looking at me.

And I don'’t wanna cause any problems, so--

Evan. I will absolutely take your case.

Heh.

Damn it, Bingum.

I just got your new-client memo.

You'’re representing the clown.

To be clear, Harrison & Parker is not a novelty firm.

Not to be argumentative,

but didn'’t we just litigate a chimp custody case?

Yes, and the chimp was appropriately dressed.

This case, waste of time.

Hear me out.

It was their third anniversary.

His wife died in a car accident.

Evan is grieving.

In a clown suit.Yes.

I'’m against this.Duly noted.

Jane, you need a second-chair?

You heard how Parker feels about my client.

Well, the guy'’s grieving for his wife.

I might have some insights.

Right. Of course.

I'’d love your help.

Yes, two VIP tickets to the Kiss and Makeup Expo.

Sure. I'’ll hold.

Again.

That'’s the premier makeup styling event.

Those tickets are way expensive.Two and a half paychecks.

All for a symposium called "Cheekbones:

The power of contour shadowing." I don'’t get it.

One-on-one sessions with the greatest makeup artists,

who are giving away their secrets and tons of samples.

It'’s fabulous.

And they'’re for Stacy, aren'’t they?

It'’s all a part of the wooing process.

Okay.

Wh-- Why did you do that?

I had to listen to Timberlake sing "Sexyback" 15 times

just to get that far.

We need to talk. In private.

You can'’t woo Stacy.

Why?You'’re going to get hurt.

What are you talking about?Stacy has dating ADD.

She met a guy at spin class, went for coffee,

and she broke up before she got her latte.

Why? Because he was wearing black ankle socks.

You make fun of me for trying to get her attention.

Why are you so serious all of a sudden?

Fred, there is a chance,

just maybe,

that Stacy might like you.

"Like" like you "like you."What? What did she say?

She didn'’t say anything, but she'’s my best friend.

Oh, my God. I wanna...

shout and cry all at the same time.

And you have a furrowed brow.

Are you really worried Stacy might hurt me?

I don'’t have a problem with that.

Fred, last time when you kissed Stacy,

you disappeared.

And I don'’t want that to happen again, okay?

Oh. I see. I broke their rules.

But, you don'’t have to worry about that.

When you started mucking up your life and they sent me back,

I made a new deal. I can kiss all I want,

I can have a relationship and it'’s totally okay.

Listen, I am your guardian angel and I am here to stay.

I can'’t believe Stacy might like me.

No. I am not completely sure.

I said I had a feeling.

Well, I have a feeling too. I am bringing sexy back.

Wow. Don'’t ever say that again.

Your Honor, A.J. Fowler, the producer of The One,

set out to humiliate my client on national television.

That'’s ridiculous.

There was no malintent. We move to dismiss.

Mr. Fowler manipulated footage to make Wendy appear unhinged.

I think the legal term is "tough cookies."

The contestant is aware that she may be embarrassed,

surprised, and/or humiliated.

Signed and initialed. End of story.

A release form cannot, in principle,

relieve a producer of all responsibility.

Your Honor, this is not--JUDGE: Enough.

She'’s right. That'’s for a jury to decide.

Motion to dismiss denied.

As head of human resources,

I warned Mr. Robbins that his attire

was inappropriate and nonstandard.

His performance record is stellar.

Yes, it is.

So then why not consider his personal circumstances?

Wearing a clown suit

is simply part of his grieving process.

I'’m sorry for your loss, but I received 27 complaints

lodged against Mr. Robbins by fellow employees.

Okay. You sound like a fair person.

So, what if my client were to agree

to return to standard attire

after a certain time frame? Say, one month from today?

If we got something on paper,

I think I could persuade my boss.

Can we just slow down for a second?

Sorry, we can'’t ask our client to accept those terms.

Can we talk outside?You don'’t have to. No deal.

Evan, you haven'’t even considered the deal.

And I won'’t.

My company wants to avoid litigation,

but we can'’t negotiate with unreasonable partners.

What the hell happened in there?

We were about to settle.

Maybe, but not in a way that works for Evan.

You offered help, that'’s not help.

You can'’t put a ticking clock on grief.

We can'’t ask him to do that.

You don'’t have the authority.

I offered to second-chair

because I understand what Evan'’s going through.

So the judge threw out the release,

so it doesn'’t matter if Wendy signed it, right?

He didn'’t throw it out.

He opened the door to testimony.

He'’s saying the release alone won'’t invalidate Wendy'’s claim.

And I still say we win.

If you settle, you open floodgates to lawsuits

from every contestant who'’s lost on the show.

Your case may take a little time,

but we will prevail.

Trust me.

Okay.

See you in court.

What?

Don'’t cross your arms at me.

What happened to not raising our client'’s expectations?

It'’s an easy one. It'’s called assumption of risk.

If you go swimming in a shark tank,

you can'’t complain when you'’re bit.

Maybe she was prepared to get bit,

but not have her entire leg ripped off.

What'’s going on, Kim?

Look, I admit I took guilty pleasure in Wendy'’s meltdown,

but that was when it felt like entertainment.

This feels like something else.

Get over it, because you'’re cross-examining her tomorrow.

If I do it, I'’ll look like a bully.

Can'’t imagine why.

It'’s not fair.

Evan'’s minding his own business

and he gets fired for playing dress up.

You know I'’m always on your side,

but dressing like a clown at work

is a little weird, don'’t you think?

You dressed like a banana at work once.

I was auditioning for fruit roll-ups.

Fine. You'’re right. It'’s weird.

But he shouldn'’t be fired for it.

I mean, the man is in pain

and if this makes him feel better,

then why should anyone care?

Some people just don'’t like clowns.

My Mom got one for my seventh birthday party.

My sister ran to her room, started crying

and wouldn'’t come out until Mr. Patches left.

I never got my elephant-balloon hat.

Oh! Coulrophobia.

The abnormal or exaggerated fear of clowns.

Are you okay?

Apparently, being afraid of clowns is a real condition.

Oh.

Twenty-seven people filed letters against Evan.

Maybe coulrophobia is a common condition.

Not necessarily. Remember senior year

when I launched a campaign

to ban white foods from the cafeteria?

Of course. The school year started in September.

Everyone knows white after Labor Day is a no-no.

I got 62 signatures.Heh, heh. That'’s right.

You got the soccer team and the cheerleaders.

And the techie geeks.You were their goddess.

Yes. But none of them cared about white food like I did.

They just signed the petition because I asked them to.

Oh, my God. One of Context'’s key arguments

is that there were 27 letters of complaint.

But maybe there'’s only one Stacy behind all those letters.

You know what I have to do.

Find the Stacy, win the case.

Hi, Jane.

You again.

I'’m still waiting for an apology.

This isn'’t my fault.

It was out of my control.

Excuse me?

You are the one who pushed the return button.

And now Grayson misses Deb,

and your client misses his wife, but no one misses me.

Because no one knows that I'’m gone.

Well, when you put it that way, I'’m really, really sorry.

No. You'’re not the least bit contrite.

No, honestly, I am. I am extra-contrite,

with a cherry on top. Heh, heh.

You'’re not sad.

Or morose.

You don'’t look even disconcerted.

You look happy.

See for yourself.

Stacy.Hm?

Hey, I had another dream about old Jane.

She'’s upset because no one knows she died.

That'’s so sad.

I should do something special for her. To honor old Jane.

You know, I love projects. Leave it to me.

Um...I can handle it.

Okay. But no decoupage. Or glue guns.

Right. Something classy.

Now, get to work and save your clown.

Mr. Westenson, you wrote a letter to Human Resources

complaining about my client'’s clown suit, didn'’t you?

Yes, I did.

You were the first of 27 letters.

A lot of people were upset.

What department do you work in?

I work in Accounting.

Oh. Interesting.

All 27 letters came from your department,

even though my client works in corporate sales.

You don'’t even work in the same building.

Make your point, Ms. Bingum.

Isn'’t it true that you asked,

well, perhaps, encouraged,

maybe even cajoled your co-workers

to write letters against my client?

I can'’t make anyone do anything.Mr. Westenson,

you haven'’t looked at my client once since taking the stand.

Please look at him.I'’d rather not.

Because clowns upset you?

Yes.

They smile all the time.

You can'’t tell what they'’re thinking.

It freaks me out, okay?

Sounds like coulrophobia to me.

The irrational fear of clowns.

On the season finale ofThe One.

I came here to find the one and I have.

Wendy, Annabelle'’s the one.

Her dreams shattered.

You said that you loved me.

We love each other. I'’m the one.

I'’m the one. You told me I was the one.

I'’m sorry.

Toby. Toby.

Toby!

Can you just turn the cameras off?

Can you turn the cameras off? Turn the cameras off!

Weeping Wendy, Tuesday at 9.

The show promoted this clip over and over,

calling you Weeping Wendy, isn'’t that right?

Yes. People shout that at me from their cars.

I'’m a punchline for Leno and Letterman.

And thanks to the Internet,

people make fun of me in China.

So you feel the show, and, in particular, Mr. Fowler,

has damaged your reputation?

What happens next time I apply for a job?

Who would hire someone who appears unhinged?

And as far as any future relationships go,

I just...

It feels impossible.

Thank you.

Ms. Simon, The Oneis in its 11th season.

Had you seen the show before?

Yes.

So you saw Melissa get so drunk,

she puked during the canoe ride,

and the time Mary Ellen lost

her bikini bottoms diving into the swimming pool

on national TV?Yeah.

You understood that though the producers

put you in a wedding dress,

it didn'’t mean you were the one.

I guess.

In fact, isn'’t this just a case of swimming with sharks

and then complaining when you were bitten?

I went on this show, despite the risks,

because I thought I was gonna find love.

But you lost.

Then, out of desperation,

you hired a lawyer to lash out at my client.

You put yourself in this position, Ms. Simon.

You knew the risks, didn'’t you?

I guess. But I just--But what?

That'’s what I thought. Nothing further.

Evan, can you please explain

why a clown?

My wife and I were at the boardwalk in Santa Monica

the day before she died,

and there was a clown performing.

And he picked Anna out of the crowd,

and he was making fun of the way she walked.

You know, she was laughing so hard.

She loved it.

So as a clown, you feel closer to her.

Yeah. That'’s true.

When you catch your reflection in the mirror,

how does it make you feel?

Um...

Like I, uh...

Like I can get through the day.

Thank you, Evan.

Mr. Robbins, do you have healthcare coverage

through Context?

Yes.And does that coverage

include mental health?Yes.

Have you sought out therapy?

No, I haven'’t.

So you'’ve chosen instead to wear

a clown costume as your therapy?

Objection. He'’s not in a position

to question how my client grieves for his wife.

Overruled.

Answer the question.

So this costume, then,

is some sort of coping mechanism?

I guess.And you'’ve inflicted

this unconventional coping mechanism on your co-workers?

No, I didn'’t think that--

The workplace is not the forum

to deal with personal issues, is it?

I asked you a question.

Mr. Robbins, you are out of order.

Your Honor.

Either stop honking or I'’ll place you in contempt.

Evan.That'’s it. You'’re in contempt.

Bailiff, take him into custody.JANE: Evan.

Don'’t touch me.BAILIFF: Let'’s go.

Jane.

So I spoke with the clerk.

They'’ll release him in a few hours.

How can I be so mad at Evan

and feel so terrible for him at the same time?

Imagine how he feels.

I mean, his pain'’s so deep, it'’s easier to be a clown.

Yeah.

Hey, Grayson.

What did you do when Deb died?

Well...

Uh...

I remember

spending a lot of time driving around aimlessly.

One time, I got in my car

to go to the gym and ended up at the Mexican border.

No idea why.

Did you talk to someone? Go to therapy?

I probably should have.

I was a mess. I couldn'’t sleep, couldn'’t eat.

Every morning, I'’d wake up

and look at the empty spot in the bed next to me and...

Put my fist through a wall.

I had no idea.

I mean, you were coming to work every day.

I billed 100 hours a week, my first month at the firm.

How did you get over it?

Well, after a long day at work, I came home

and all the plants were dead.

There was nothing in the fridge,

and my walls were full of holes.

I remember thinking that if Deb saw me,

she wouldn'’t like the man she was looking at.

So I cleaned up the house, cleaned up my act.

To be the man...

That she wanted me to be.

Yeah.

Yeah.

Ugh. I hope that is a roast turkey

with chestnut stuffing.

Why do I crave Thanksgiving during summer?

The card shop is going out of business

and I bought all of those Valentine'’s cards for 99 cents.

That is planning ahead.

They are gonna help me with Stacy.

See, I have recently learned that she might like me.

You?Yes.

Don'’t mock.

And, for some reason, whenever she'’s in the room,

I can'’t seem to form complete sentences.

Which is why I am turning to the professionals

who are paid money to write down what women wanna hear.

"I love you when the day is new. I love you when the sky is blue.

And when the sun'’s about to set--"

I'’ll tell you, you'’re an idiot.

Hilarious. All right, check this out.

It'’s romantic and sophisticated.

It means "I'’m sorry, your grandfather died."

Fred, you don'’t need to be poetic.

Just be real.

Tell her how you feel.

Real, feel.

I can work with that.

Oh, sure. There were plenty of great women to choose from.

But in the end, I was totally going for Wendy.

So, what happened?

Well, the night before I was gonna propose,

A.J. strongly suggested that I choose the other girl.

Strongly suggested?

He said that Annabelle tested higher with the viewers.

So if you chose Annabelle, it would be better for the show.

Yeah.

Nothing further.

You weren'’t forced to choose Annabelle, were you?

Well, they didn'’t put a gun to my head.

You list your profession as contractor,

but you'’re a struggling actor, aren'’t you?

I do a little bit of both.

You picked Annabelle because you thought

it would raise your profile as an actor?

Why not?

A couple of the guys from The Real Worldgot agents.

So you dumped Wendy

because you thought it would benefit your career.

If Wendy suffered any emotional distress on the show,

aren'’t you responsible, not my client?

Hey, I was just looking out for myself.

He'’s the one that asked me to break her heart

and put her meltdown on TV.

Nothing further.

Kim. Hey.

What is going on?

It'’s not going well in there.

Maybe not, but our client hasn'’t testified yet.

Think A.J.'’s gonna win the jury over?

Not if you keep throwing looks at him.

You choose to represent slime balls,

your colleagues might have an adverse reaction.

What is going on with you? A.J.'’s not a bad guy.

No, he'’s a gem. It'’s the dumb girl'’s fault

for looking for love on a reality show.

She deserves to get dragged through mud.

We'’ve been through this.

Don'’t you say, assumption of risk,

or I swear to God someone'’s going down.

Okay, what are we really talking about here?

We are talking about you and that girl in the elevator.

Eileen? I don'’t even talk to Eileen.

Exactly. You don'’t talk to any of your exes, do you?

When I'’m in a relationship, I'’m in 100 percent.

When it'’s over, it'’s over.

And your ex turns into the invisible woman.

She assumed the risk.I don'’t understand

why you'’re taking this personally.

Because relationships end.

I work for you. What happens when we'’re over?

Hey.

Thanks for bailing me out.

Well, I couldn'’t very well leave a clown in jail, right?

It was a little iffy in there. Not everyone'’s a fan.

I got your message. You wanted to talk?

Yeah. What happened in court,

it really hurt your case.

I know. I...

I messed up. I'’m sorry.

Evan, can I ask you something personal?

At this point, why not?

Take a seat.

If your wife were still alive,

what would she think about all this?

What do you mean?

Dressing like a clown,

acting up in court, getting thrown in jail.

How do you think this would look to her?

I don'’t know.

I guess like my life'’s messed up

and that I got what I deserved.

Wait. Sorry. Got what you deserved?

What aren'’t you telling me?

Evan, please.

This.

It'’s my fault.

No. It was an accident.

She was making our anniversary dinner,

asked me to pick a basil on my way home from work

and I forgot.

I told her that we didn'’t need it,

but she insisted.

She wanted dinner to be perfect.

And she went back out to get it.Evan.

And on the way to the store, that'’s when it happened.

You know, Anna died because...

If I'’d just done what she'’d asked--

Listen to me.

This wasn'’t your fault.

Evan,

a man very close to me

lost his girlfriend, whom he loved very much.

And he told me

that he was only able to move on

when he started to see himself through her eyes.

Obviously, I didn'’t know Anna.

But I don'’t believe she'’d blame you for what happened.

I loved her so much.

And I'’m sure she loved you too.

But she loved the man she married.

Not a clown.

Okay. Here.

Can I help?

Yeah.

Okay.

Hey, A.J. Do you know what'’s going on?

I got a text telling me to meet here.

Yeah, I got the same text.

Hello, people. I can explain.

A.J., remember the other day

when you suggested we settle this case?

Yeah.I should have listened.

I'’ve actually scheduled a meeting

with Wendy and her attorney.

Really?Last night, I was thinking

about Toby'’s testimony about the ratings.

And I found something interesting in the case files.

It was a confidential research memo

listing the audience appeal of every contestant on the show.

You know where this is going, don'’t you?

Wendy was rated higher than the winner,

if you were only after ratings,

you would have just let Toby pick Wendy, right?

Yeah.I don'’t understand.

When did you realize you were in love with Wendy?

What?

He'’s right.

I never met anybody like Wendy.

She has no guile, no pretense, no agenda.

She was-- Heh.

She was genuinely looking for love.

And Toby was looking to launch a TV career.

I wasn'’t trying to hurt her.

I was trying to protect her from that jerk.

Why didn'’t you tell her how you felt?

Too risky.

A.J., if you cared for her,

why did you show her in such an unflattering light?

The network controls promotion.

I couldn'’t do anything about it.

Wendy Simon and her attorney are here.

Maybe it'’s time to take that risk.

Hello again.

Um-- Before we start,

I'’d like to apologize to Wendy.

And I'’d like to do it in private.

Absolutely not.

I will be present for any interaction.

Wendy, just hear me out.

Please.

It'’s okay, Paula.

I'’ll be fine.

Evan, I hardly recognized you without your clown makeup.

To be honest, it feels kind of weird

people aren'’t staring at me. Heh, heh.

Oh. Thanks.

Lady and gentleman,

may I introduce your client, Evan Robbins?

Wow. You clean up nicely.

I just wanted to say thank you.

Both of you. I got my job back.

That'’s fantastic.

And I'’m doing my best to move on.

I'’m sure Anna would want that.

It'’s you, isn'’t it?

Jane told me about a friend whose girlfriend passed away.

You'’re gonna be okay, Evan.

Yeah.

Well, uh, I gotta go.

My lunch break is over in 10 minutes,

and I don'’t wanna be late, so...

Thank you.

Bye, Evan.

Grayson.

Thank you.

For what?

For letting me see Evan through your eyes.

And for talking with me about Deb.

I know that couldn'’t have been easy.

Well, it beats punching my fist through walls.

I should be thanking you.

For listening.

I'’m here.

Anytime.

"Love is"...

"Love is fire."

Ahem. "Love is rain. Love is..."

"Love is rain."

Hey.Oh!

I got your text to meet you here. What'’s up?

Hey, Stacy. Um...

It seems, um...

As far as, uh--

Did you want a hot wing?No, thank you.

Love is fire.

Love is, uh, rain.

Love is sunshine.

It seems, um--

Oh, my God.Let me start again.

It'’s Charlie Taggart.Who?

He was in my acting class.

We dated for a while, but he dumped me.

He dumped you?

For a girl with a recurring role

on The Bold and the Beautiful. Uh!

He'’s coming over.CHARLIE: Stacy?

Hello, Charlie.

You look fantastic.

Uh, this is Fred. Uh, Fred, Charlie.

Hi.How'’s the acting thing going?

It'’s going.

Slowly.Hey, don'’t worry about it.

With looks like yours, you don'’t need talent.

Hey.

I will have you know that Stacy

is one of the most talented actresses of our generation.

She illuminates the human condition by her very presence.

Her soul is pure and kind,

she is one of the most graceful people I'’ve ever met.

In fact, she is both bold and beautiful.

So go get us a waiter and tell him

I want some ranch dressing.

Fred, that was really sweet.

Uh-- Stacy.

I'’ve been trying to ask for some time.

Uh...

Would you go out on a date with me?

Isn'’t this a date?

Oh, um, I...

Absolutely.

Yeah.

That'’s the first time

I'’ve been kicked out of a settlement meeting.

I hear Wendy and A.J. are continuing

at the little bistro on the corner.

Yeah. Maybe...

she found love on a reality show after all.

Anything'’s possible, right?

Yeah.

Kim.

Can we talk about us?

Okay.

You were right. Relationships end.

But you should know, this is the first time

I'’m not thinking about the end at the beginning.

So I was wondering if you would reconsider

going away this weekend.I don'’t--

Look, I understand you'’re taking a risk dating the boss.

But I'’m taking a risk too.

How?I would like nothing more

in the world than to go away with you this weekend.

But you could say no.

Not after hearing you say that, I couldn'’t.

Ah, finally, you'’re home.

Hey.You were right about Fred.

I like him.

We had wings, and we kissed.

You kissed? He didn'’t disappear, did he?

No. He went to the store.

We ran out of algae and tofu.Okay.

And guess what.

He bought you and me tickets to the Kiss and Makeup Expo.

How sweet is that?

He'’s an angel.Heh, heh, heh.

Stacy, I'’m so happy for you.Thank you, sweetie.

But enough about me. It'’s time to talk about Jane.

Come.Okay.

Ta-da.

Stacy, this is awesome.

Would you like to say something?

Yeah.

It'’s long overdue,

but tonight, we memorialize Jane Bingum.

A woman who was never mourned because no one knows she'’s gone.

Jane...

thank you for the gifts you'’ve given me.

A loving family

and an amazing singing voice. Heh, heh.

Gorgeous, shiny hair.

Flawless skin and great teeth.

Ooh. She does have great teeth.

And a brain that'’s never let me down.

I promise to honor your memory

by living the best life I can.

And if you'’re watching me now,

I want you to be proud of the life I'’m living.

So here'’s to you, Jane Bingum.Heh, heh.

A phenomenal woman

whom I'’ve never met.

But I'’m getting to know better and better every day.