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THE DELIGHTS OF THE GARDEN

Here.

- Right. - Thank you.

Go ahead.

Fermín García López.

Fermín Gar...

- García López, here it is. - Yes.

Go ahead.

- Hello, good afternoon. - Hello.

I'm Catalina Björk.

- Björk? - Yes, like the singer.

Björk, B-J-O with two dots, R-K.

Oh, yes, yes.

- Thanks a lot. - Thanks.

Look, it's leaving.

Hello.

Look, my friend Grip Face did this work.

It's about his view of human being social networks,

and the sensation we all have of being connected.

Look, it goes up with the elevator,

the image is transformed...

and discusses that inner disconnect that we're all undergoing,

that void. Look at how it's transforming.

- It's awesome, eh? - You're like an art encyclopedia.

Wow.

- Wow. It's awesome. - What patience. I love it.

- I love it. - Yes, yes.

A little about a new project

- that I hope will surprise you. - Fermín?

- Fermín? - It'll make you laugh a little.

The work we have here is by Mario Klingemann.

He always works with the latest technology,

exploring the possibility of co-creation

between the human being and the machine.

Presenting AICC,

Artificially Intelligent Critical Canine.

AICC, with its camera eyes,

is able to look at a painting

and thanks to the algorithms the artist himself has designed,

it can, in real time,

write a review of this painting,

which will come out from its butt right now,

if we're lucky.

- But... Fuck! - What are you doing?

- My painting was here. - Yeah, it was, it was.

Now it's in the racks in the warehouse

with 80% of the artists in this collection.

But can they just do that?

- Fermín?! - Yes?

Remember me? Laura.

We met at Art Basel Miami, don't you remember?

- Yes, Laura. Laura. - How are you?

- How are you? Great. - How are you? You look great.

- Hello. Laura. - She's my wife.

His gallerist.

Well...

- Well, see you later. - Okay.

- Yes, at the cocktail party. - Very well.

- See you later. - See you later. Ciao.

Fermín,

we've been separated for over 10 years. Why do you do that?

- I don't know, it just came out. - Here.

- Your mail. - Why do you give this to me now?

If not now, I don't know when I'll be able to.

Sure, but...

You have to change your address, or all your letters come to me.

But to change my address I have to register myself,

and I can't do that in a garage, can I?

Good afternoon. Welcome to the Solo Collection.

Today is a great day for future art.

Today I'm honored to present the international competition

to select the five artists who will give us their particular version

of one of the most mind-blowing works

in the history of art.

I'm referring to, as you know,

Hieronymus Bosch's masterpiece "The Garden of Earthly Delights".

It's like a messenger of time

from the court of Philip II to the present day

to continue discussing the great themes

that continue to concern humanity.

Spirituality, vices...

- What a snooze. - What?

What a snooze.

... the vulnerability of man

and the duality of good and evil, science and God.

What is it that makes this hallmark work by Bosch

maintain...?

PABLO SON

Please.

So much fucking cellphone.

I'll go on. Let's see...

What is it that makes this hallmark work by Bosch

maintain all its power intact?

Pabu.

Pablo, I'm coming!

What's up? Look who's here.

What's going on with you?

- How are you? - How are you, man?

- Good, and you? - Really good.

He behaved great. He ate up a bit of my dad's garden, but...

But all good, all good.

I have zero chance

that Martín Solo will choose me in his top ten.

- Five. - Well, five.

You could very well be in his top five.

Yes, if only, but you saw what happened.

They took down my painting that was in the corridor.

Abstract Expressionism is is totally démodé right now.

You can go back to figurative, you're good at it.

Figurative... I don't know what we're doing here.

I've told you a thousand times.

You can't always hide in your cave.

- You have to go out a bit more. - Socialize?

Yes, to relate to people. It's essential in the art world.

Yes, but look, the people here are Pablo's age.

I don't understand them.

And all so dark, you can't see anyone.

Look who's there.

- Who? - Antoñito. I'll say hi to him.

Antonio. Antonio, dear.

- Hello! - Hello, Pepa!

- How are you? - How are you?

- I'm so glad you're here. - Sure. Here I am.

- Everything alright? - So so.

- Why so so? - Fine.

- Perfect. - I'm perfect.

- Perfect. Look. - Perfect.

Look who's here. Come over here.

- Hello, Fermín. - Hi. How are you?

- How are you, Antonio, maestro? - How are you? Hello.

- How are you? José Gabriel. - Fermín, how are you?

- Good. María Dolores. - How are you doing?

Look, I was talking to Fermín

and asking him why he doesn't go back to figurative work,

he's so good at it, and enter the open competition.

What do you think? I don't know.

How's your painting going?

Good, I've changed my style.

- I've switched a bit to... - The Pollocks.

- No, to the Pollocks... - Well...

- The Pollocks. - To abstract expressionism.

Yes, more or less. To the Pollocks.

You paint very well.

What I've seen of yours I've really liked.

- Thanks a lot. - Yeah, sure.

The thing is, on changing style...

If you need to change, you change.

Yes, yes.

Anyway, he still looks good...

Excuse me, maestro, may I take a photo with you?

Sure, with us, with Fermín and me.

- Yes, well... - Is that okay?

- Yes. I'm delighted. - Sure. Yes.

- Oh, how exciting. - Hello.

I really admire you. I love your work.

- One... - Wait, put it more...

One, two...

Thank you.

- Fermín. - What a scare.

- What's up? - You gave me a fright!

- Not much. Here... - Weren't you in Malaga?

- Yes, but what's this? - The social life, you know.

- Conventions we have. - Yes, I should be in Malaga,

but I forgot the sketches.

You don't say.

And as usual, I'll end up making a fool of myself.

- Yes. - I came to get this.

You never make a fool of yourself.

And you're making a huge mural, right?

- Is it 10 meters or something? - 10? It's 70 square meters,

with 9 meters of scaffolding. I don't know how I get into this.

- You don't say, fuck. - They tricked me.

I asked for two guys to move the scaffolding

and a hotel with a spa,

sauna, masseur... everything.

Well done, otherwise with your tendonitis...

Shit, yeah. And how are you?

How is it sleeping here?

Fine, you know, it's temporary, right?

Actually, the house

and the studio in the same place doesn't usually work. Anyway...

Right, well, be careful.

You're alone here,

but so you know, if you smell too much solvent

and start laughing by yourself, get out,

because you're getting high. Seriously, you can go braindead.

You don't say. Maybe it'll be a cheap drug.

- Yes. - Javier, wait, I'll open up.

- See you when I get back. - Right, yeah, great.

- Hello? - Dad, it's me.

- Pablo? - Yes, open up, please.

- What are you doing here? - I've just got in from India.

I called you and you hung up.

No, no, no, it's just...

- You're back from India then? - That's what I'm telling you.

Okay, but weren't you coming back next week?

Will you open up and we can talk inside?

Okay, okay, sorry, yes.

Wait, wait. Stop, stop there.

How are you?

- Good. - You're looking sharp.

- Yes, well... - Where have you been?

I've come from an official event. How are you, son?

Hey, this is great. You look very handsome, eh?

The India tan.

- Yes. You brought the beast? - Hey!

- You don't say. - There he is.

Hey, hey, indeed!

Hey.

- I don't know what we'll do with... - Relax, relax.

You know the trauma I had with that Toy Bulldog.

That was ages ago.

But childhood traumas linger in the memory.

- Look what I brought you. - Oh, incense, cool.

- What you asked me for, matches... - Matches?

Do people still use matches?

- Jeez, for everything. - And this?

And look, a shirt... one of those you like.

- I love the color. Let's see. - Saffron.

- How is it? Good? - Very good.

Terrific. Listen, did you do any painting?

Yeah, sure. Look.

Very nice.

- Do you like them? - Yes.

And this? Don't tell me you were in a Leninist ashram?

No, no. That's Kerala, it has a Communist government,

so it's full of hammers and sickles.

- Sure, sure. - Che Guevara, those things.

Hey, this woman here? Is this Estela?

- Yes, it's Estela, yes. - Don't tell me you still paint her.

Well, now and then, yes.

Mom... She's calling me.

Yes, Mom, how are you?

Good. No, here in...

- Dad's studio-house. - Shall I get out an egg?

For the omelet, to get it at room temperature.

Oh, okay, yes.

I can't tomorrow, I'm meeting up with Pabu.

We're going to Leroy Merlin to buy stuff for the van.

Yes, I'll work on it here. Yes.

No, I haven't told him yet, but I will now. Yes.

Come around this afternoon. I'll show you the work.

Yes, Dad likes it.

Right, terrific. Big kiss. Ciao.

What's this about Leroy Merlin?

That's right...

I'm going to do the van thing here.

- Here? - Turn it into a camper van, yes.

- If you don't mind. - No, I don't mind.

- It's an awesome place. - Sure, yeah, yeah.

I may have to ask you for some money. An advance.

- Money... - I've come back flat broke, Dad.

I don't have any cash.

Then let me have the card.

Well, the card is... Listen, Pablo, what is this?

- Get down, chubby. - Jeez, man, this...

- Look, it's covered in hair. - He's shedding.

Right. I'll do this. I'll leave you the card, okay?

Don't strain it too much because the account's not great.

And buy me one of those hand-held vacuum cleaners, okay?

- Okay. - But one that works.

- Okay. - Here you go.

Jeez.

Pabu's helping me too. You don't mind?

Pabu. Pabu's coming too?

He's got experience with this stuff.

You don't know how his van turned out, man.

You're rolling a joint here?

Yes. Well, it's CBD.

And this is a fine I've got again.

- For what? - Shit, I don't know, the car.

I sold it, but it keeps coming back and back... The eternal return.

Ah, Nietzsche forever.

- How's the CBD? - Here. Good.

- Yeah? - It's nice.

Fermín!

- Wait, I'll open up. Wait. - Jeez.

Come in.

What's with the dog? It's bigger than you are.

It's my son's. He's back from India and saddled me with it.

He saddled you with it, sure. Tie it there.

- I'll put it under here. - Can you?

There you go. Watch the whisky.

Sit down, sit down. It's been ages.

- Yes, I don't have much time. - Sure, don't worry.

- Have you seen the news? Amazing. - What news? What's going on?

They've found a copy of "Venus and Adonis" by Velázquez.

What painting is that?

A painting that disappeared in the Royal Alcázar fire.

Royal Alcázar? What Royal Alcázar?

The Alcázar was where the Royal Palace is now.

I think about 500 works burned in that fire.

- You don't say. - A disaster.

Gosh.

At least the original was purified by fire. That's something.

- Yes, that's something. - It's a thing...

- Am I speaking too loud? - No, no, no.

I have a new hearing aid and it's not adjusted yet.

- Am I too soft? Can you hear me? - No, I can hear you fine.

- What'll it be? - Yes, a shot, please.

And bring me a glass of water on the side.

And a glass with lots of ice too, but very cold ice.

- But ice is always cold, sir. - Not always, there's ice and ice.

Some ice... Quiet down, I'm talking to the waiter.

Some ice melts quickly and very good ice

is permafrost ice, from Antarctica and all that.

- Do you want a drink? - No, I have to go.

- Look, because I have to... - Thanks.

I have to go to the post office...

Sorry, they're calling me here.

Excuse me for a second, I'll see who it is.

It's Julieta, Julieta, yes.

Julieta, go ahead. No... We'd arranged to meet?

No, that can be done later.

I'm with my friend Fermín.

We arranged to meet today?

No, I'm not drinking.

- Say hello from me. - Okay, from you.

No, he's having a non-alcoholic beer.

Me too, I don't drink anymore. I told you, no, darn it.

That's enough of... I don't drink, I've never drunk.

Fermín! Fermín!

- There, take it. - Okay.

Here, your dad's thing.

And when you can, I need the money for Portugal.

Yes. Sorry, I don't know what the hell's wrong with the card.

- It's great, son, I love it. - You do?

Yeah, yeah. This, look, I love it.

Eh?

The loose outline, the right tones... Very good.

- Thanks a lot, Mom. - I think I could find you a gallery.

- Really? - Not mine, you know.

- Uh, I don't know. - Son, the figurative has no place.

You know I devote myself to...

the work of artists at the end of their careers,

with a solid discourse, you know.,

A solid discourse, huh? Like sheet body and paint, maybe?

- What? - Lots of sheet metal, then paint...

Do you know about that shark? The one in formaldehyde?

- What shark? - What was his name?

- Damien Hirst. - That's the one.

This guy's gets in with a big shot in advertising.

- Saatchi, from Saatchi and Saatchi. - Saatchi and Saatchi.

Anyway, he puts it up for auction...

- Where was it? Christie's? - No, at Sotheby's.

He puts it up there, does a ton of publicity and...

he sold it for... I think it was 12 million.,

- 12 million. - 12 million.

- That's right. - Who'd pay 12 million for that?

The same one who paid for it will resell it and so on.

- And so on. - They all make money.

Now instead of having a Lambo in the garage,

it's much cooler to have a Hirst rising in value there.

- Obviously yes, logically yes. - Well, it's just that a painting...

- But having a shark in the garage... - Oh, look who's coming here.

Oh! Look, look. He always ignores me.

What's wrong? Have you seen a ghost?

It's worse. They sent me an obituary.

- What's this? - Here, read it.

It's a seizure order.

Current accounts, credit cards, everything.

They're freezing all of it.

I told you, Fermín, you can't neglect this.

But I've paid all my debts, Pepa. I even sold my house, damn it.

You paid your debts to the bank, but not to the tax office, Fermín.

Now the tax office is claiming

your arrears for non-payment, surcharges, the interest over years.

What a disaster! You're a mess!

- You'll have to lend me money. - Why me?

- You're my gallery person, Pepa. - And?

Gallery owners lend money to their artists.

No, sorry, that's something from the last century.

Do I look like a Medici to you? I've advanced you plenty already.

Money you squandered on your friendships and your trips.

Why don't you sell these paintings, even if it's half price?

When will you get that you can't lower a painter's cachet?

I'd like to get rid of the paintings I have in storage.

It'd be good for me. But your dad's case is different.

- Because? - Because he's painting Pollock style...

Pollock, Pollock... Will you stop talking about Pollocks, please?

Calvo Serraller, a very important critic,

said my work combined the poetics of Rothko

with Malevich's constructivism.

Sprinkled with a little Pollock, he said that too.

- Yes, he said that too. - Of course he said it.

Your father has the collectors all confused.

Before, when he did figurative work, he had a steady clientele,

but since he's been doing Abstract Expressionism,

- nobody buys from you. - One has a right to evolve, no?

An artist can't always be painting the same thing, I say.

Well... I have an idea.

I'll give you an advance, but on one condition.

- What? - What?

- That's right, what? - You sign up for the Bosch thing.

The Bosch thing? But for that I'd have to be a figurative painter.

You're not figurative, but you know that Martín Solo

wants a work by you in his home.

- In the living room? - In the bathroom, who cares?

- In the bathroom, Pepa, please. - Sorry.

But the bathroom is a place as worthy as any other.

- Exactly. You got it. - See you later.

Fermín, you're in no position to oppose which work to choose.

No, because if they choose you at Solo,

they'd give you some money to sort this out.

And more importantly, you'd enter the market.

- Right. - With figurative work, sure.

- But I can't, I can't. - You can, you can.

- Yes, he can, he can. - I can?

You can.

- I can switch to figurative? - 100%.

I don't know, I could do a work called

"The Delights of the Garden", for example.

I love it.

You like it?

- I'll make you a transfer now. - Really?

- Really, into your account. - No, no, the tax office will take it.

Into mine, if you like.

Let's see...

Well, yes. With the signal in this place it's impossible.

Here. I'll deposit 3000, okay?

3000, I can't do anything with 3000.

And I have to pay Pabu.

- And the rent for this garage... - I came back from India broke.

Very well. Then 5000.

And you make do, okay?

I'm going, I have some collectors waiting,

I hope, for God's sake.

They can save me from closing the gallery. See you!

- 'Bye. - See you.

Now I get the Pollocks, with that hand.

- How long have you been like this? - A few years, yes.

Well, don't worry, I'll help you paint it, okay?

- Really? - Yes.

- You'll paint it? - I'll paint it.

Right then.

Have you heard from Estela?

- Estela, I've seen her, yes. - How is she?

Fine. Don't you talk to her?

No, well, we share songs now and then.

We put on each other's songs.

- It's weird, but anyway... - What?

Since we share the account,

sometimes, if I see she's online,

I put on a song, so she remembers.

- Does she do the same thing? - Actually, not lately, man.

Right.

Pablo, honestly, that sounds a bit creepy.

- Right, I know. - I think you should get over it.

- Sure, sure, yeah, yeah. - Or get on Tinder.

- Me on Tinder? - Or do I introduce to you someone?

The guy market is terrible.

Girl friends asks me: "Do you know anyone?"

I say: "Any requisite?", "That he showers".

I swear, the level out there... If he can talk...

It's not so bad. No, Tinder's not for me.

I'm not into those things, no.

You're working hard there, eh! Like some coffee?

- No, thanks. - No, thanks.

Your dad's so nice.

Come on.

See you.

- Ciao. - Ciao. Ciao.

- We're all a bit nervous. - Yes, some more than others.

- This is crazy. - This? I think this guy

was either an only child or took the wrong mushrooms.

I don't even know where to start.

- That'd be... paradise, right? - Yes, that's right.

- And the center's the world now. - Yes, well, the present.

The present, okay. So here we could put in

the consumer society, capitalism...

Well, socialism, the tax office...

- Fuck, what are you doing? - If this is a Pollcock...

- A Pollcock... - We'll cover it up, relax.

- Well, fuck... - Hey, I was thinking...

- Yes? - The Prado's near here.

- True, we have the Prado. - Let's go see it for real, right?

Sure, let's go see it. We forget about the Prado.

The world's greatest art museum.

- We should go every month... - How long since you took LSD?

- You want us to go to the Prado high? - Sure, to see it with his eyes.

- With Bosch's eyes? - Sure.

Fuck, I don't know. Well...

No, no, no, no. Not this, not this.

- Not this what? - Fuck, change the song.

But it's the radio, Pablo.

- The fucking radio. - Don't you like it?

No, I love it. It was just our song.

- Whose? - Estela's and mine.

We'd put it on to... well...

I think I'm coming down. How long does it last?

Around 5, 6, 7, 8 hours

- It's pretty unstable. - Okay.

I was reading here that Bosch never left his city.

- Really? - Yes.

It seems the guy was checking out

some sacramental plays there, that were passing by,

so they inspired him to make the work.

So, in the end El Bosco was a costumbrist painter, right?

- Yes, something like that. - Look, let's see...

The "Garden of Earthly Delights" is clearly a moralistic work

that criticized the vices of the time, right?

- That's right. - So...

- Let's see, yes. - Maybe we can do that, eh?

- Yes? - I think so, right?

I mean, politics, right? Politics, but now.

Sure, but if we do that, we'll be overrun by Hell.

That's true. And Heaven will be empty for us.

What's this?

IT WAS A PLEASURE TO MEET YOU

Sorry, please... I... I can't right now.

A girl I met in Solo.

- Look, Antonio López. - Yes, Antonio López, yes.

- Nice. - I was there too.

- What do I tell her? - Tell her...

- "It was a pleasure to meet you". - That the pleasure was mine.

- The pleasure was mine. - Okay, right.

So, as we were saying. The problem I see above all in...

in the...

"I hope we meet again".

- Here, tell her I hope so too. - Okay.

So, let's see...

The problem we'll have is with the present,

the middle section.

- Yes, because it'll be empty too. - Sure.

Sorry.

"By the way, today at 7 pm I'm going to an opening of collagists".

- Oh, the girl's an ecologist. - No, no, she says "collagist".

- I think she's referring to collages. - Oh, collages, okay, okay.

- Tell her "Okay, I'm in". - You're going there now?

- Yes, why not? Does it bother you? - No, it doesn't bother me.

- But we're here with... - Okay, I'll go briefly and come back.

- You've run off before. - No, sure.

- Okay, I'm taking a shower, okay? - Right, see you soon.

Pablo.

I'll take the card, okay?

Pride Positive is a CESIDA project

to fight the stigma and discrimination

towards people with HIV.

And we need everyone to smash this stigma.

Bravo!

- How are you? - Hi, how are you?

- This is my friend Fermín. - Nice to meet you.

Aurora!

- How are you? - How are you, Catalina?

- Do you know Fermín? - Hello, Fermín.

- Hello, Aurora. - How are you?

My friend the collagist! Show him your collage!

- Look, this it, Fermín. - She does wonderful things!

Look, this is my collage, Fermín.

This is a woman who, if you look from below, is naked.

Great!

- Great! - Then this monster-man,

who sort of holds her so she can't move,

because most women with AIDS in prostitution

have it because their clients or pimps don't use a condom.

AIDS is always linked more to men,

but I wanted to also talk about women and AIDS.

- Fermín, you look familiar. - Fermín García López.

- You don't say. - He's a super-famous painter.

Of course, yes.

How has your life been?

I've gone through several stages of painting,

but the collage world is new to me.

I love it.

Nice to meet you, and to see you, dear.

- I'll come by the workshop one day. - Of course. You're invited.

- Yes. - We'll make collages.

- Great. - Okay? I'd love to. See you later.

Martina.

How are you?

- Cool. And you? - Great.

I think this place is full of people waiting for their date.

Yes.

How about we go have a drink at a terrace?

- I'd rather walk a bit. - Okay.

Otherwise I feel kind of weird, like...

- it's a job interview. - No, hey, no.

Right, let's walk a little.

Sorry, I always feel a bit like this on Tinder dates.

- No, it's fine. - I feel exposed,

as if I was being analyzed,

psychoanalyzed as a potential partner.

- Do I look like a psychologist? - You say no, but you never know.

It's true, you never know.

Lavapiés, where people come to wash their feet.

Being all very Muslim, they washed their feet.

Sure. Do you know it's a way...?

Foot washing was a form of gratitude.

- No, I'm from Madrid, Madrid. - So you're a local boy.

- Not a real local... - Yes, a real local boy.

One grandfather wasn't.

Are you from La Pampa?

No, La Pampa, I mean, it's in Buenos Aires, but not...

Not all of Buenos Aires is La Pampa.

- In what style do you paint? - My style is...

- realist... - Okay.

So, what I do in my videos

is to enter a dialogue with the work of other artists

and how it ends up in me, in my gaze.

Okay, so you do video-performance.

Yes, and my studio is in my home.

- But you have a crew... - But the craziest thing...

No, I do it all myself.

I don't think human beings are meant to be stuck there,

eight or twelve hours sitting in front of a screen.

We're not meant to scratch our pussies

with a glass of wine and watch Succession.

Exactly.

Hence the back problems as well.

- Absolutely. - Right?

I should be in some lost field in Europe

cracking the skull of a German, a teenager.

And yet, at the end of the day, they get you to do an Excel.

Exactly.

What I don't quite get is where you spread your work.

Because it's not a work you can show in a gallery, is it?

I use social networks, Instagram

and that allows me to show it all over the world.

- Oh, right, right. - It's like I have my own gallery.

- I have lots of followers. - Good, good.

For example, could I be a follower of yours?

- Sure, sure. Yes. - Really? What do I have to do?

Nothing, just...

- Excuse me, are you paying by card? - Yes.

- Do we split the bill? - No, no, let me treat you, please.

- I'll get it next time, okay? - Okay, yes, fine.

No, it's... Yes, here.

I think it's very interesting, because it's a way of...

- Your PIN, sir. - My PIN?

Hey, how come you went to India?

- To paint, to meditate? - I went to paint.

- It was an artistic residence and... - Oh, great.

Yes, the thing is that after so much time there,

going here and there, I came back flat fucking broke.

Still, I think I can afford to invite you to...

- an Indian restaurant. - No, we'll split it.

Let me get this and you can next time. All right?

Oh, okay.

Are you sure there'll be a next time?

The guy's confident.

The thing is...

No, it has to be here. Hold on.

It turns out that you don't have a red cent.

- No, yeah, yeah. - I'll get it.

- No, no. - I'll get it.

No, it has to be here, I swear.

It's fine, Fermín, these things happen.

- Sure, but I'm mad about the PIN. - It's fine,

- you just get it another day. - Yes, I'll get it.

Sometimes I forget my PINs too.

- Did you like the exhibition? - I loved the exhibition.

Do you make collages too?

No, my daughter Olivia makes collages.

- Really? - Aurora's invited us to her studio.

Do you want to go one day? A Saturday or a Sunday.

- Yes. - Oh, hold on.

- That's your daughter? - Yes.

My mother's Swedish and my daughters speak Swedish too.

Oh, okay, but I thought Björk was from your father.

No, no. In fact, my last name is actually Gutiérrez,

- but I like Björk more, you know? - Oh, really?

- Sure, it's much cooler. - It's cooler, so...

- Wonderful. - ...I call myself Björk.

- Here. - Oh, great.

Yes. Well, well.

- Come on, a kiss. - A kiss.

- And thanks a lot. - Rest up. Thank you.

Yes.

- You live in a garage? - Well, no, it's my studio.

Cool.

Yes, when I'm working on a major creative process,

I prefer not to be apart from my work.

Whenever you want, we'll meet and I'll do a dialogue on your work.

- Sure, whenever you want. - We'll talk.

- Right, rest up. See you. - Likewise. See you.

Hello, hello.

You're alone?

- What's up with Milei? - Are you fucking with me?

- What's wrong with Milei? - Okay, now I get it.

- You're a fascist. I can't believe it. - A fascist, what?

- What do you mean, fascist? - Hey, wait, wait, wait.

Fascist? I'm a liberal.

- Oh, liberal! - It has nothing to do with it.

Now will you explain to me what a liberal is? Go on.

- Go on. - It's no big deal.

You're an asshole

who only draws peckers.

Wait.

Who are you? Were you spying on me?

- No. - Martina!

- Oh, Pablito, holy shit! - Hey, a bit of respect, eh?

- Who are you, his dad? - No, no, I'm his studio partner.

And what are you? A bunch of snow jobbers?

- What's that? - Liars.

- No, no, no. - I don't believe you.

- Are these paintings yours? - No, I wish, I wish.

At least you didn't lie about something, Pablito.

- No, they're not his either. - Oh, my God.

Piss off. I really am a sucker.

Shit, what happened? Milei?

Milei, Milei, yes. I'm never talking about politics before fucking again.

What you shouldn't do is talk about Milei.

I mean, really,

how could you think of it with an Argentinean as well?

Dad, what's the fucking problem with Milei?

What's your problem with Milei?

Shit, Milei's an ultraliberal who favors the super-rich.

Ultra, ultra, super, mega, whacko liberal.

He's just a liberal, Dad. He's a liberal.

What's the problem? You're always on about the same thing.

No, the problem is that he's exploiting the working class.

- No, Dad. - He's even ruined the middle class.

It's the usual story of socialism. It's the opposite.

- The opposite? - Quite the opposite.

Only lies need government subsidies.

- The truth imposes itself. - Who said that?

Escohotado. Who else? You should read him.

Come on, don't hassle me.

Dad, one can't talk politics with you. Let's drop it.

Yes, that's better. Let's drop it.

- Hey, is this mate? - She left her mate.

The girl left it. I've never tried it.

Try it, it's not bad.

I hope it doesn't make me bitter.

How was it with that girl?

Good, good, actually, she's a very interesting girl.

We were at the exhibition of some friends of hers and...

Well, she knows a lot about art.

It was very nice talking to her.

But interesting, interesting?

What does 'interesting, interesting' mean?

Well, if...

If there's anything else or she's an "ecologist"...

No, no, it's just a friendship.

Look, one thing, do you know...?

Could you make me one of those Instagrams?

- An Instagram? - Yes, she's on Instagram, so...

Are you going to become an influencer now too?

No, no, no. Well, I don't know.

I don't know how to do it.

And can she be tagged?

- What's her name? - Catalina Björk.

Catalina Björk. Like the singer?

Yes, like the singer.

- Let's see... Is this her? - Yeah, yeah, yeah.

- See that little heart there? - Yes.

- This is called "liking". - If I "like" her, will she know?

Sure, that's what it's for.

But don't "like" everything or you'll look like a stalker.

- A what? - A harasser.

No, no, no. A harrasser, no.

No, no, no.

- But do you think this girl...? - This girl what?

Well, I don't know...

Since she's very cute, maybe you're getting cocky.

- As you usually do. - Get out of here.

- She's just a friend, that's all. - Okay, yeah, yeah.

Well...

I'm going, I'm meeting someone.

- You're meeting up? - I'm meeting a girl, yes.

- Another one? - She's less than 2 km away.

- Is that a map or something? - It's like a map, yes.

But we haven't finished the painting.

We don't even know what we're going to paint.

For now we have a dick. Tomorrow we'll see, I don't know.

No need to do it all the time, it's two in the morning now.

Okay, okay.

And all this is a fucking mess.

I'll tidy it up tomorrow morning.

- Yeah? - Don't worry.

- Okay. - Right.

Oh, let me have the card.

The card, shit. You have to give me the PIN.

- Yes. - And don't take it from me.

Take it from you? I told you to get it.

- I didn't realize. - Because you don't listen to me.

What a mess with the Argentinean. You pay, I pay and in the end...

- No. - It's so embarrassing.

Don't worry, okay? We have this competition.

- Okay. - 100%.

THE COURT KAMASUTRA THAT WAS WITH PHILLIP II ON HIS DEATH BED

ROYAL PORN

Hey, go away, go away.

Go away, go away.

You're accused... banned content... child porn, zoophilia, rape, etc...

...a fine of 1635 euros.

- What's up, Vishnu? - Pablo.

- What's up? - Do you have the card?

- Yes. Why? - No, it's just...

What's all this here?

No, I have to pay a fine that came up here.

Yes. The police have got me online.

- The police? - Yes, I was researching

Phillip II and the Garden of Earthly Delights, you know.

All this is from... I entered "royal porn", okay?

And suddenly I had a real porn page come up.

And right away, look what I got, man.

- Let's see... - They want money from me.

No, shit, Dad, this is a con.

- A con by who? - Nigerians, Russians, who knows?

But it has the seal of the National Police.

Yes, sure, because they do it...

This one's a bit crappy I must say, but...

Are you sure? Shit, don't tell me...

Here's the National Police,

a tweet saying this is a con.

In fact, look, it's the same screen shot that you saw.

- Fuck. - Relax.

Really...

And when you click on porn, go to the usual ones, right?

I don't know, Xvideos, Pornhub...

But I'm not clicking on porn.

It's the first one that came up.

Don't give me a hard time now.

"Portrait of Geraldine Chaplin" by Antonio Saura.

One of the founders of the El Paso group.

Chusa!

- Is this art or can I toss it? - Please, not now.

She's asking if the painter is alive.

No, no, Saura passed away some years ago.

Good.

"Scar", by Rafael Canogar.

Another historic Spanish abstract painter.

They ask if they can see his studio, visit him.

No, no, no, it's far away, quite far, in Toledo.

Pepa, they want to know if the artist is alive,

if they can take selfies with him, visit his studio,

because this way his work rises in value, right?

An artist who's also about to see St. Peter, right?

- Who is it? - It's me.

I've brought you something.

- Who is it? - Your mother.

Gallery owner.

Churritos!

I know it's rather late, but...

Don't tell me you just woke up.

Do you know what time it is?

I worked late last night.

Right. Put these on a plate.

Make some coffee, son.

I work better at night, I concentrate better.

Well, the news.

Some Chinese collectors are interested in your work.

- Oh, really? - Yes. In one of your Pollocks.

But first they'd like to take some selfies,

- check out the studio, you know. - Okay.

- If you don't mind. - I don't mind. Are they rich?

And in a rush. They're here for a few days and want to see it all.

The Prado, the Segovia Aqueduct, the Valley of the Fallen, everything.

They want an artist that's about to croak,

for a quick revaluation and such.

- Fuck, Pepa. - It's fine. You know how this works.

- Don't take it personally. - How can I not take it personally?

I remind you, you're in no position to get all fancy.

- Now you have to be on stand-by. - What?

Stay here, because I may bring them at any moment.

- Who? - The Chinese, Fermin. The Chinese.

- Oh, okay, okay. - So, how's your Garden going?

Good.

I mean...

Really?

- What's wrong? - I don't believe it.

What do we have now, five years?

No, that'll be covered up, it's the base.

Shut up, please, shut up.

Is that all you have on your mind?

And it annoys you that I call you "Little Willie".

Give your dad some coffee, Maybe he'll wake up and paint.

You have 17 days to do the triptych, Fermín.

17 days. And we have no idea what we're going to do.

Yes.

- That Catalina got to you. - What?

No, no. I'm here, just killing time.

Sure. You'll end up being an Instagrammer.

But careful, girls can smell that.

- If you get too obsessed... - They smell it?

- They smell it, they smell it. - No, well, you'd know, right?

You never stop hooking up.

No, it seems like it from outside, but then I don't follow through.

- You don't follow through? - No.

At the last moment I think of Estela all the time.

I have to make up an excuse.

- Milei, or something... - Look, forget about Estela.

- No, yes, I know. - Come on, let's get to this.

- What can we do? - Let's see...

We said the corruption thing didn't work, right?

No, our Hell was full up and Heaven emptied out.

We can go ahead meanwhile painting the background,

the trees, the lakes, see what we come up with.

Maybe we can make it about painters.

- Painters? - Yes, I don't know.

Well, that'd be nice, but there are so many painters

we'd end up making an encyclopedia of art.

I know, right?

Do you realize this peeling wall looks like Europe?

- Yes. - Look, France, Spain...

It's true, shit, it's true.

Maybe we can do it on Spanish painters.

- Spanish painters? - To narrow it down a bit.

Yes, good idea. Okay. Who do we put in Paradise?

- Velázquez. - Goya.

- Zurbarán. - Sorolla, Ribera.

Okay, that's covered.

- In the center. - The center, the present, yes.

- Antoñito López, right? - Antonio López, of course.

- Then the classics, Dalí, Miró... - Miró. Okay.

- Picasso. - No, not Picasso.

Picasso was a son of a bitch, he goes into Hell.

Sure, but we're only talking about the artistic side.

- We forget the rest, right? - Okay.

An in Hell, I'd put in...

- Renoir. - Renoir? He's French, man.

Sure, but we can make an exception, can't we?

- An exception or several. - Or several.

- We can put in... Damien Hirst. - Damien Hirst, Jeff Koons...

- Tracey Emin. - Tracey Emin. Okay.

- End of cycle! - End of century, she says.

Let's put in artists from the end of the century.

Sure. Which artists could be end of the century?

No, no! Finished!

- End of cycle! - Oh, sorry, thanks.

- Yes. - Yes, sorry.

- Thanks. - Thanks.

- Fuck. - Fuck, it's all run.

The Indian shirt. We'll look like Hare Krishnas.

Gosh.

He who has the ideas puts on the music.

Explain it to him.

I'm thinking the painters thing isn't going to work.

Because?

They have to be painted very small and they won't be recognized.

Do you know, for example, what Zurbarán looked like?

Or those from Hell, Jeff Koons, Damien Hirst and those people?

- Yes, I mean, no. - By the way, what's this here?

- Saturn devouring his son. - Oh, Saturn, but it looks like me.

Will you put that away, please? We're not going to make it.

Okay, okay. I'll change the music, this is a pain in the ass.

- The painter chooses the music, right? - Okay.

- You're pissed off. - I'm not pissed off.

- You're in a bad mood. - You put me in a bad mood.

- I put you in a bad mood? - Yes. You come here, invade my home,

drink my beer, smoke my dope,

plus I have to put up with your far-right conspiracies.

Is everything you don't like far right?

- It's fascism, Pablo. - Oh, yeah, it's fascism.

Look, fascism doesn't exist. It hasn't for years.

It all has to be renamed fascism

or your house of cards falls down.

I love liberalism, it's a wonderful theory.

Liberalism is the only system that believes in human kindness.

Not like socialism, which believes we're all bastards

- trying to take advantage of everyone. - Aren't we?

Maybe yes, but socialism...

- Don't explain socialism to me, okay? - Okay, it's misanthropic.

- Misanthrope. - Do you believe we need a guy

on top of us, telling us what to do and what not to do?

- That's democracy, Pablo. - Fuck democracy.

You're irresponsible, Pablo. You do what the fuck you like.

You know very well that even if I work 12 hours,

in this profession I won't make a cent.

I either served drinks or I paint.

You're telling me? You think I've made it big?

- Without a devouring father, maybe. - A devouring father. I'm Saturn.

Eating my children.

And a lady holding exhibitions for you since day one.

I could've become a lawyer or some shit like that.

But no. Sure, since the kid is good at painting,

- we must encourage him. Look... - Because it's true.

"Why aren't you a painter like your father?"

- Because you're good at it, Pablo. - I'm good at it, Dad.

You have no idea how it works, damn it.

Right now it doesn't matter if you're a good painter.

Now what matters is followers, likes, green hair, the character...

Look, Pablo, we've helped you every way we can.

You haven't helped me at all,

not one exhibition in Mom's gallery.

What do you want us to do? We can't do everything for you.

You have to have your own life as well,

your own independence, your own initiative.

- I'm leaving, okay? I'm leaving. - You're leaving?

- Yes, I'm leaving. - If you do, don't come back.

Hold on, hold on. Leave me the card.

My card?

Yes, because the card money is to do the painting.

Right, we'll do a simple spread. Past, present, future.

No! Wait, wait. The toll of the spirits.

- What toll? - The toll you pay the spirits.

Can't you pay with spiritual money or with...?

- No, no, no. - Oh, okay.

Cash.

- Do I send you a Bizum now? - Whenever you want, but yes.

- I'll do it later. - Okay.

- In case I don't like it. - The past. First one.

The Lovers.

The Lovers is a card that could mean a loving relationship,

thrilling, arousing.

- That's great, right? - If I hadn't come out upside down.

So it means something more philosophical,

like that love shouldn't be so much the end

- as the road to follow. - That's nice.

Very well, the present.

Shit, Conflict.

Unsatisfied desires, fears,

useless efforts you may be making.

I'm a real catch.

- No, Saturn can also tell you... - Saturn?

Yes, this card symbolizes Saturn in Leo.

It wants to say that you can solve all this step by step.

Okay. It makes sense, but does this have a solution?

Sure, everything has a solution. Except Death.

Future. I'm very curious about the future.

- Go. - Okay.

Death, jeez!

- It all has a solution except Death. - Except Death.

Exactly. But it's a nice card,

because it means renewal,

beginnings, rebirth.

Yeah?

- You twist everything, eh? - No, no, it's the cards.

Yeah, yeah.

It can also mean some past relationship you need to close.

You have to do it accepting the pain that entails.

- Okay. - Yeah?

- Everything has its price. - Yes, for a few dollars more, eh?

Yes, specifically five euros,

which you have to send to me by Bizum right now.

- It's a shame it's cloudy. - Did you want to see the stars?

- Don't you? - Yes.

Look. If you want, I can tell you the constellations.

- There's... - You don't have a fucking clue.

It's cloudy, you'll never know.

Look, Sagittarius. There in that cloud...

Yeah. Look, there on the right,

- by that branch, Cassiopeia. - Yeah, sure.

Cassiopeia is there.

I'll look up the constellations, you fake,

and I'll show you up.

Can you imagine a load of shooting stars going by

and we're missing them because of the clouds?

But doesn't that happen all the time?

Yes, it does.

That's true too.

Did you know their composition means a different-colored trail?

- Stele? - Yes, that tail they leave...

Yeah, yeah, no, I know what a stele is.

- Everything okay? - Yes.

I can't live without you, there's no way...

This song is wild! I love it!

- Did you put it on? - No, it's your Spotify, I think.

Have you seen my phone?

Uh... no.

Before.

- Can you call me? - Yes, I'll call.

- Are you sure it's not there? - I don't know.

Look, I think this is it.

Well...

- Are you okay? - Yeah, yeah.

- I wanted to say something... - Yes, tell me.

- Never mind. No, no, no. - No what?

- No, no, nothing. It's just... no. - What, what?

- No, it's silly. No, no, no. - Well, I like silly stuff.

Well, all the time there's... a buzz.

- A buzz - Yes.

What do you mean, a buzz?

A buzz, like...

- What? - Like we're going to fuck and I...

Ah, no, no, no.

- No? - No.

No, no.

Hello, Catalina.

Whenever you like we can do our dialogue.

Maybe...

- No, like... - I knew it, I knew it.

No, that's...

I'm a bit uncomfortable.

Do you mind driving me to a bus stop?

No.

- Okay. - No, no.

I mean, no, no.

THE GARDEN OF EARTHLY DELIGHTS

Fermín, listen, one thing.

Can we meet tomorrow at the usual terrace?

For coffee. Coffee or whatever.

Right, you'll tell me.

A big hug.

Well, what so important that you had to tell me?

Well, I'll tell you. I'm thinking of making a decision,

a major decision, and I wanted to talk to you about it

because you're my best friend, you know that, right?

- Yeah, yeah, sure. - Well...

I'm thinking of splitting up with Julieta.

You're kidding. But you were the perfect couple.

- We called you Romeo, remember. - Perfect, no way.

I can't take it anymore. The control, Fermín. The control.

I can't, it's unbearable. The control is unbearable.

Calling me all the time. And since I have this goddamned hearing aid,

it's here in my ear all the time. I sure do admire you.

You realized in time and you separated, that's it.

And I'll tell you something else.

We don't fuck anymore, not at all.

- At your age, Antonio... - Fuck my age.

A short while ago we were fucking like crazy, fucking like crazy.

What's wrong? Am I speaking loudly?

I can't handle this earpiece, I haven't got the trick yet.

Goddamn it, really.

- Excuse me, may I take this? - Yeah, yeah.

Thank you.

Did you notice?

- What? - The perfume. That girl's perfume.

- "The smells I perceive from the wind..." - Machado.

No, Miguel Hernandez.

"My eyes without your eyes are not eyes,

- they are lonely anthills". - Excuse me.

Yes, what is it? Take it, I'll look for it here.

Catalina? Yes. Let's see...

"My Eyes Without Your Eyes", a poem by Miguel Hernandez.

Maybe today's good to do the photos and the video performance?

Yes, great, the video performance, sure, yes, yes, sure.

I'm kind of like that, I do it on the fly.

Yes, I don't mind, I mean, I also like

these spontaneous decisions,

so all this is great, yes, yes.

- Is it good for you? - Yes? Okay, right, great.

At six you say? Okay, right, right then, yes, yes.

Okay, see you later. Ciao, ciao.

Hey, Antonio, I have to go.

No, sit down, I'll read you the rest, it's beautiful.

It won't take a moment. Sit down.

- The ending. - As we were saying, just the end.

"The smells I perceive from your wind and the forgotten image of your track

that in you love begins and in me ends".

- Very nice, very nice. - Why are you always in a rush?

Where the hell are you going now? And you didn't tell me anything.

You don't listen to me. What do I do?

- Do I separate or not? - Look, let's do this...

Don't separate, eh? Don't separate.

You have to think things over, give them time.

They can be done like this, in the heat of the moment.

- Heat of the moment, he says. - Relax. Yes, think it over.

Here's your glass of ice.

- The ice is cold? - Yes, very cold.

Thanks a lot, thanks a lot.

Well, okay, I'll think it over. Right, see you later.

See you later, man. 'Bye.

- What's up? - Pabu, how are you doing?

- Good. Some beers or what? - Go, go for it.

- What time is it? - No idea. Hold on.

Twelve.

- Hello. - Hey, hi. How are you?

Well, here's your studio.

- Wow! - I'll help you.

- Yes. - How marvelous!

- Yes. Do you like it? - Please, help.

In the center of Madrid.

- There. - Yes. Yes, yes.

There, I think.

Very good.

I love it.

Yes.

Terrific.

- Sorry, sorry. - Yes.

- This is a little... - Oh, thanks a lot.

It was covering your eye.

Carry on.

Perfect.

And those there? I love those.

No, those are from a forgotten period.

I love them and I'd like to cover all your periods.

- I love those paintings. - Really?

- Yes. - Well...

- You're still hooked, right? - Me? No.

I mean, do you notice?

- Because? - Because... she's pregnant.

Great! Right?

It's good, huh?

- Yeah? - Yeah.

Do you know the...?

You have a call. Your mother.

- Yes, go ahead. - Hello, son.

I'm calling your father but the phone is off.

Put him on, go on.

Oh, you're not at home?

Jeez, that's a shame.

No, I wanted to take the Chinese to him, they're leaving tonight.

But I'm afraid of going there and your father's not there.

- You have keys, don't you? - Yes, I do,

but I'm not in Madrid, Mom. I'm in the country.

Oh, in the country? But far away?

Right.

Never mind. 'Bye.

- Is something wrong? - No.

Some Chinese want to buy a painting by my dad or whatever.

My mom wants me to go there and open up. It's so...

Watch the Chinese, they start by buying your dad's painting

and end up buying the whole country.

That loneliness is heavy.

- Yes, yes, the truth is... - That void.

It turned out well.

I think it's a bit noisy.

I'd do it, I don't know, with more movement.

- Yes, I think so. I think... - And this one?

Wow! This has power, it's like it's on fire.

Well, this is also from a period that I'm over.

- I'd rather we focused on... - No, it's decided, this one.

A red flame, there.

Perfect.

Hey, son, one thing. I've been thinking

that since you two are so busy,

tell your dad to forget about the Chinese.

We'll leave it.

I'll sell another painter in my gallery to them.

Oh, and when you can, give me back my 5000 euros.

Alright? Tell your dad. Big kiss. 'Bye, son.

What's that? Borgo, come here.

No, this is one that I'm... it's not finished.

Explain it to me.

Well, look, this is Spain emptied out, in a way.

I imagined technology vanishing

all over the Iberian Peninsula,

well, all over the world, and what's left is nature,

what there was at the beginning of it all.

And "Saturn Devouring His Son"?

No, that was a silly thing that occurred to me in...

No, I'm erasing this now.

- This is unfinished. - Borgo, I see a video here, eh?

Terrific.

Anyway, I think...

we've got it, I have to go, girl.

- Oh, well... - Thank you so much.

No, thank you both. Thanks.

For me, leaving figurative work behind has been a liberation.

Yes, because with abstraction I'm much freer.

Bringing to light our unconscious side, right?

And, for example, the fact of using color,

yellow and blue, look, they're fundamentally...

This is Javier. He's a neighbor, a friend,

and I let him park his bike here.

- How are you, Javier? - Fermín.

- How are you doing? - Great.

- How was it in Malaga? - Spectacular, spectacular.

We filled the Pompidou with waves from the open sea.

Good.

And the scaffolding was nine meters high.

It was crazy. It was a slog, but it's great.

- Look, this is a friend of mine. - How are you?

- Hello. - Nice to meet you.

Catalina.

- I'm Javier. - How are you?

Well, Javier, we were having a glass of wine.

Have a glass with us.

Well, look, I'm in a terrible hurry.

I have to pick up one of my best works

they've requested for a collective

and I'm taking one of the best works I've done in recent years.

Fermín, I'm leaving the bike. You don't mind, do you?

- No, I don't mind. - Take care of it.

- I'll take care of it. - Nice to meet you. See you.

- See you. - Right.

- Well, Fermín, I'm leaving. - You're leaving? But...

- Yes. That's it. - But we haven't had...

- I'm in a hurry. - You are? Okay.

- Well, I'll help you. - Yes, help me, go on.

Let's see... I was thinking that...

That thing we talked about before,

the open day, right?

Yes, well, I'm very busy.

I've been commissioned to do some works and I'll be tied up.

- Really? - Yes.

But this is an informal thing, eh? I mean...

Sure, sure, but... I don't know.

- Well, maybe later. - Your shoelace is untied.

- Oh, yeah? - Yes.

Oh, true.

- Sorry. - This way, please.

- Careful with the... - Hello.

Come in, please. Let me introduce...

Wait, wait. This is yours.

Wait, wait, I'll help you.

- Hi, how are you? - Hi, good afternoon.

Well, here, go ahead. He's the artist.

Presenting the famous artist Fermín García López.

Not even three days and you act like a caveman.

- But, babe, she was an influencer. - You don't answer the phone.

- Sure, but... - No, you always do this, Fermín.

The Chinese leave tonight. This is their only time to come.

Anyway, never mind.

As you can see, it's a very unusual space.

It's an old car park converted into a studio.

Here you see how García López's work has made a major shift.

You see? A leap in style.

In my opinion, his latest works, these large paintings,

are a giant step forward

that's sparking great interest in international circuits.

You must forgive us, they like it a lot,

but their plane leaves in a few hours and they have to go.

Ah, well, of course.

Can you tell them it's been a great pleasure for me

to spend all weekend showing you Madrid and its surroundings?

- Okay. - I'll go with you. Please.

- Please. - Thank you.

- Jeez, these Chinese. - Shit, man.

Well, how was it with that influencer?

Nothing.

So-so. Move that way. Put it there.

- How was it with yours? - Fine. Fine, fine.

I found out that Estela is pregnant.

- Jeez. - It's fine.

- Hey, I'm happy for her. - Yes, good.

- That's love, right? - Yes. What is?

That, being happy for her, not needing her to be yours.

- If she's doing fine, that's it. - Sure.

- Ideally, it'd be with me, but... - Yes.

But in the end, if it's not me, and it's not me,

be happy as well, right?

Love is a pretext to own someone else.

Yes, that's true.

So, I'm not the star of my own movie, right?

- It's fucked up, but that's it. - Sure, that's life, Pablo.

Yes, that's life.

And I'll have to ask you for my card.

- The card, you say? - Yes.

But money is for he who works, Pablo.

- But Dad, who painted this? - If you call that painting...

There are mountains, a little sea and the peninsula.

I painted it all. Not like you, you haven't painted anything.

Hey, what have you done? You spend all the time partying.

Hello?

Yes?

What's going on?

Pablo, did you paint that?

I knew you were acting weird.

What's going on?

This is what's going on.

- But Fermín... - Yes.

- Oh, my goodness! - I can't paint.

- Now I understand everything. - Yes.

- The Pollocks... - Drop it with the Pollocks, please.

- I'm stupid. - No, look...

What about those Chinese? Are they buying...?

No, how can they buy, Fermin?

- You looked too alive for them. - Fuck, I'm sorry, shit.

And all weekend showing them around Madrid, I'm up to here.

Boats in El Retiro, ham...

flamenco... Look, really.

Wait, wait, I'm getting an idea.

- What? - No, for the painting, I mean.

Get the foreigners' point of view.

Yes, but like a critique,

put in all the cliches.

The Holy Week processions, flamenco...

Ah, okay. Julio Iglesias...

Sara Montiel, Lola Flores...

- The "sardana," the Aragonese "jota"... - That's right.

Gazpacho, paella, the running of the bulls...

Yes, all that in the center, okay?

In the present, right? But what do we do with Paradise?

- Adam and Eve. - But Spanish Adam and Eve.

- The Catholic Monarchs. - The Catholic Monarchs... Okay.

And who do we put in Hell?

I don't know, the creators of all the cliches,

- the Black Legend, the English... - A very good idea.

Tourists in Benidorm, scorching themselves like crabs.

All those gigantic buildings right on the beach, right?

- You can't see anything... - Yes, corruption, construction...

- Really, guys, I love it. - Really?

- I love it. - Wow!

- Pablo, I'll ask you something, please. - Go ahead.

- Help your dad with this, okay? - Sure.

Well...

Get started.

- We've got it. - We've got it.

Get painting.

'Bye.

- Ciao, Mom. - Ciao, ciao.

Where's your mother?

I don't know. She's usually punctual.

Good evening. Welcome.

The day has come to shake up the history of art.

Next, I'm going to announce the selected artists

who will do a version for our collection

of Bosch's masterpiece "The Garden of Earthly Delights".

First, the Dutch collective SMACK

with their work "Speculum".

Mu Pan with "Mu Pan's Garden of Earthly Delight".

What a hoo-ha this is.

Sholim with "Heaven X Hell Series".

Cassie McQuater with "Angela's Flood".

And finally...

Catalina Björk with her work "Emptied Spain",

a video-performance that is an axe blow to our social conscience,

the abandonment of rural areas

and its impact on the woman in the 21st century.

Son.

Mom, where were you? We didn't win.

I know, I heard a whisper. I've sold it.

- What? To whom? - "Earthly Delights", to the Chinese.

- I've been calling you... - Hold on. To the Chinese?

But didn't you say he looked too young to them?

Sure, I told them your dad had a heart attack.

- What? - I had no choice.

- Where is he? - He went to the bathroom a while ago.

- Oh, really? - Yes.

I think the Catalina thing has upset him.

Oh, my God, don't tell me.

- We have to find him before... - Before what?

Really!

What is this?

But...

- My God! - What have you done?

What is this?

But, Fermín...

And he stands there...

gawking.

- What is this? - What have you done, Dad?

Oh well, fire is purifying.

It reminds us how ephemeral life and art are.

The painting was sold, Fermín.

- This painting was sold? - Yes!

- But to whom? - To the Chinese! The Chinese!

But didn't they say I was too alive?

Right, but in life you have to keep at it sometimes, got it?

Really...

What's he doing now?

Hey, Pablo.

What are you doing?

What I should've done a long time ago.

- Estela? - Yes, sir.

Well done.

What have I done for you two to turn out to be such assholes?

I don't understand. Look what you've done, Fermín.

Look... Look... Right?

- Hey... - Hey, if you look at it...

- It's nice. - Yes.

- It's got... - Yes, these blues here,

with the complementary yellow, it looks good, doesn't it?

Splashed, but also with...

a figurative part.

- It actually... gets to me. - Yeah, yeah.

I'm thinking like a gallery owner.

- It has a touch of Pollock. - Yes.

- It's García López's new stage. - Yes.

Thanks to me, of course. My stamp is on it.

- Well, me too. - Hey, you understand.

Hey, who painted this?

Yes, but who had the idea?

- Yes, and who finished it off? - You burned it.

- Well... - As a gallery owner...

We now go to the last lot of the afternoon, number 127.

A triptych by Fermín García López.

The title: "The Delights of the Garden".

Price covered on the web at 10,500 euros.

Who bids 11,000?

The bid is 11,000. Who bids 11,500?

The bid is 11,500.

Who raises to 12,000?

12,000 euros, 12,000 euros here.

Who raises the bid?

Remember we're dealing with a recent work by the creator

that attempts to integrate the initial figurative period...

When do the Chinese stand down?

Who raises the bid?

20,000.

Did you say 20,000?

Now the bid will be...

28,000. Who bids 28,000?

28,000 there. Who bids 36,000?

36,000 euros for this marvel by Fermín García López.

The bid will be 44,000.

Who bids 44.000?

- 50,000. - 50,000. You said 50,000.

The next minimum bid will have to be...

Antonio, please, stop there, stop there, damn it.

64,000.

Does anyone bid 64,000?

No?

We return to 50. 50,000 going once.

50,000 going twice.

64,000 in the room, ladies and gentlemen.

I know this lot was going to be a big success.

64,000 euros.

We go for 78,000.

Anyone for 78,000?

No? We go back to 64,000. 64,000 going once.

64,000 going twice.

64,000 going... 78,000.

A bid of 78,000 euros here, ladies and gentlemen.

Very well, 78,000 going once.

78,000 going twice.

Sold!

It's the most anyone's paid for my work.

Yes, well, don't get your hopes up,

anything over 50.000 you have to give back.

- Are you sure? - I am.

- At least you can pay the taxman. - Yes, it's a relief, but...

Well, lighten up, it didn't go too badly.

I will when you've painted all you have to paint.

ONE YEAR LATER

I gave him the idea of the burns, right?

- Yes. - You?

- Yes, me. - But...

Shit, when I told you about the Royal Alcázar fire. Remember?

- Okay, the fire purifies thing. - Exactly.

Fire purifies. Yes, I said it.

Excuse me, Fermín.

Fermín, sublime, spectacular what you've done.

Brilliant, noteworthy.

- You'll go down in posterity with this. - Gosh.

This shift you've made, I'm stunned. Well done.

Excuse me, Javier, this is my wife.

I don't if I've ever introduced you. Julieta, Javier de Juan.

- Five or six times. I'll kiss you. - Yes. Yes.

Hey, please.

What's more, the last time we saw each other

was at your exhibition, the Conde Duque opening.

Excuse me, I must tell Fermín something.

I'm so grateful for the advice you gave me.

Really?

Because indeed what you need is dialogue.

That's the key. To approach the other person and dialogue.

So Julieta and I are now much better than before

because we talk about everything, all very calmly.

- I'm so glad, Antonio. - You deserve it too.

- Really? - Yes, you deserve to be happy.

To have a relationship again.

- Yes, I'd have to... - Why don't you get back with Pepa?

She's a smart lady. Look what she set up for you here.

- With Pepa? - With Pepa, sure.

You know her. You have to smooth things over,

- but you should get back with her. - Really?

- Yes. - But now...

Sure, try it now. Try it, go on.

Listen to me, Fermín, listen to me.

- Congratulations, girl. - Thank you.

Goodbye.

You must be happy. Sold out on opening day.

- And at those prices. - Yes, we're even with the Chinese.

From now on, all money.

Yes, but don't you relax. There are taxes to pay, remember.

But I paid them.

On the paintings you've just sold. The taxes on the paintings.

I haven't seen a cent, let the Chinese pay.

Don't complain, you're a sought-after painter again.

Yes, that's true. All thanks to you.

Hey, that perfume is new, isn't it?

- I don't know, no. - No?

No, I don't know.

"The smells I perceive from your wind..."

No.

- "My eyes without your eyes..." - What's wrong with my eyes?

No, "My eyes without your eyes are not eyes,

- but lonely anthills". - Ah, Fermín...

Yes, but "the smells I perceive from your wind..."

Wait, I'll look it up here.

Miguel Hernández, "My Eyes Are Your Eyes".

Please, Fermín, you're acting so weird.

No, here, I've got it here.

- "The smells I perceive from your wind..." - Excuse me.

"And the forgotten image of your track

that in you love begins...

- and in me ends". - Artist.

- What's wrong? - No, nothing.

You're pale. Oh, didn't you know?

- No, no, no. - With the Chinese...

Fermín, congratulations. It blows my mind, eh?

The "Burnt Spain" thing is absolute genius.

- Thanks. - Hey, I want one.

It'd look terrific in my living room, eh?

- Your living room? - Yes.

I know they're all sold, for sure, it's what you deserve,

but maybe you have a waiting list in case someone drops out?

Yes, we'll put you first on the waiting list.

Thank you, I'll call every Monday at 12 o'clock

- I want my painting. - Yes, yes.

- Thanks, Fermin. Congratulations. - See you later.

Congratulations, you've gone from the bathroom to the living room.

Yes.

- Well, see you later. - See you later.

- Very nice paintings, eh? - Yes, yes.

- Goodbye. - 'Bye.

Well, I guess I'm liberated now. I'm free.

- What? - I can paint under my name, right?

Look, Pablo, you didn't get it at all.

I'm starting to be sought-after now.

Now we can start making money, both of us.

No, but at some point I'll have to paint, won't I?

- I'm a painter too. - But why? Don't you want money?

Yes, I want to make money, but shit,

I don't want to be in Fermín's shadow forever.

In the shadow? I've got the brand, Pablo.

It's a way to make money for the family, for fuck's sake.

A way to make money, sure, all this brand stuff,

- but I painted this. - Look, I don't care,

I can get painters to paint this...

- Anybody. - Oh, yeah?

Yes, like all the great painters, like Jeff Koons.