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[THEME MUSIC PLAYING]
2
00:00:17,756 --> 00:00:19,019
[WHISTLING]
3
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Briarwood Country Club, eh?
4
00:00:22,457 --> 00:00:23,806
Swanky.
5
00:00:23,893 --> 00:00:26,504
Members only, huh? Oh, boy.
6
00:00:26,591 --> 00:00:28,332
A bunch of exclusive
stuffed shirts,
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standing around, talking about
how great they are.
8
00:00:31,379 --> 00:00:33,859
Sounds like my kind of place!
9
00:00:33,946 --> 00:00:36,297
Chauncey, I saw your Cutlass
in the parking lot.
10
00:00:36,384 --> 00:00:38,386
I see my stock tip paid off.
11
00:00:38,473 --> 00:00:41,215
Reginald!
Shaved a few shots off
your course record yesterday.
12
00:00:41,302 --> 00:00:43,260
Looks like you owe me
a steak, you rascal.
13
00:00:43,347 --> 00:00:44,827
All right, Leslie,
my daughter's wedding
14
00:00:44,914 --> 00:00:46,307
is in 30 minutes,
and I need you
15
00:00:46,394 --> 00:00:48,309
to make sure
everything goes perfectly.
16
00:00:48,396 --> 00:00:49,440
Of course, Bernie.
17
00:00:49,527 --> 00:00:52,139
Please, call me Mr. Briarwood.
18
00:00:52,226 --> 00:00:54,228
Uh, of course, Mr. Briarwood.
19
00:00:54,315 --> 00:00:56,534
And, might I add,
that when it comes
to coordinating weddings,
20
00:00:56,621 --> 00:00:59,885
I'm the best man for the job.
[CHUCKLES]
21
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Don't make jokes, Leslie,
22
00:01:01,452 --> 00:01:03,193
and don't make
direct eye contact with me.
23
00:01:03,280 --> 00:01:06,501
Eye contact is reserved
for Event Managers only.
24
00:01:06,588 --> 00:01:08,720
Look sharp.
I'll see you in 30 minutes.
25
00:01:08,807 --> 00:01:11,767
[SCOFFS] I can't believe
I've worked here
for ten years,
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and I'm still 2nd Assistant
Junior Event Coordinator.
27
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[SLURPING] Woo-hoo!
28
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A duck?
In Briarwood Country Club?
29
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Unacceptable!
30
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Ooh! Now's my chance
to prove to Bernie...
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Ah, Mr. Briarwood, that
I'm Event Manager material.
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-Excuse me, sir.
-[SPITTING]
33
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Perfect timing, my good man.
34
00:01:35,312 --> 00:01:37,227
I need more
of these cocktail weenies,
35
00:01:37,314 --> 00:01:40,012
a couple of jalapeno poppers,
and some mozzarella sticks.
36
00:01:40,100 --> 00:01:42,189
And you might
want to freshen up this punch.
37
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I am not a waiter, big mouth!
38
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Big mouth? How rude!
39
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I'd like to speak
with your manager.
40
00:01:48,412 --> 00:01:50,588
There is no manager.
41
00:01:50,675 --> 00:01:53,722
DAFFY: But your name tag says,
"2nd Assistant
Junior Event Coordinator."
42
00:01:53,809 --> 00:01:57,117
-Yes?
-Is there a 1st Assistant
Junior Event Coordinator?
43
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-No.
-Is there a 2nd Assistant
Senior Event Coordinator?
44
00:02:00,859 --> 00:02:02,644
-No.
-All right, who's your boss?
45
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He'd be the Event Manager.
46
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-Then let me talk to him.
-There isn't one.
47
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The position
is currently vacant.
48
00:02:09,999 --> 00:02:13,045
Let's go over this
one more time.
49
00:02:13,133 --> 00:02:14,699
Listen, you!
50
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Mr. Briarwood's daughter
is getting married today!
51
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She's getting married?
52
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Why didn't you tell me?
53
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-[EXCLAIMING]
-I haven't
gotten them a gift, yet.
54
00:02:25,188 --> 00:02:26,668
Those gifts
don't belong to you!
55
00:02:26,755 --> 00:02:28,800
Got to see what's inside,
so I don't double up!
56
00:02:28,887 --> 00:02:30,106
Ooh! What's this?
57
00:02:30,193 --> 00:02:31,673
Something for
their first garage sale?
58
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A gift card!
That took a lot of thought.
59
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A toaster! How retro.
60
00:02:35,633 --> 00:02:38,245
Another toaster?
Geez, guys, use a registry.
61
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You're ruining the presents!
62
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Oh, these presents
were already ruined.
63
00:02:42,031 --> 00:02:44,425
Who gives a Christmas sweater
at a wedding?
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Actually, that's from me.
65
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I'll return it for you.
Woo-hoo!
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I'll tell you
what every newlywed needs!
67
00:02:49,865 --> 00:02:52,041
Silverware and fine china!
68
00:02:52,128 --> 00:02:54,783
And they're definitely
going to need one
of these chocolate fountains!
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00:02:54,870 --> 00:02:56,306
And you know what else
every household needs?
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A 2nd Assistant
Junior Event Coordinator.
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-[GRUNTS]
-It's perfect.
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00:03:01,877 --> 00:03:03,835
Hey!
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00:03:03,922 --> 00:03:05,576
It's hard
to rehearse a wedding
when the groom isn't here.
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00:03:05,663 --> 00:03:06,969
BOTH: There you are!
75
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All right, here's
the schedule.
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Three o'clock,
the guests arrive.
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At 3:06, the bridesmaids
are given roses.
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-Ow!
-Careful. They still
have thorns.
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00:03:13,932 --> 00:03:15,630
So, you're out there,
it's 3:07.
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-Release the doves.
-What doves?
81
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-[DOVES COOING]
-[GAGGING]
82
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Don't eat the doves.
Release the doves!
83
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[LESLIE SCREAMS]
84
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You know, when Leslie here
asked me to be his best man,
85
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I said, "How can I be
his best man? I'm a duck!"
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[RIMSHOT PLAYS]
87
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Come on, buddy.
It's a rehearsal.
88
00:03:32,342 --> 00:03:33,648
How about a little support?
89
00:03:33,735 --> 00:03:36,216
Oh, yes! That's a great one.
Good joke.
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00:03:36,303 --> 00:03:38,479
I'm kidding. Who wouldn't
want to marry Leslie?
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He's a catch!
Although, to most women,
92
00:03:41,003 --> 00:03:42,787
he's one catch
they'd want to throw back.
93
00:03:42,874 --> 00:03:44,833
-[RIMSHOT PLAYS]
-Uh, yeah.
You got me that time.
94
00:03:44,920 --> 00:03:47,879
I kid! But, really,
when I heard Leslie
was gonna get married,
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I said, "I'm sorry,
96
00:03:49,794 --> 00:03:52,014
"but how long
has your new wife
been nearsighted?"
97
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-[RIMSHOT PLAYS]
-Okay, that's enough.
98
00:03:53,581 --> 00:03:55,974
I'm joking. She sees fine.
99
00:03:56,061 --> 00:03:58,194
She sees his bald spot,
his crow's feet,
100
00:03:58,281 --> 00:04:00,370
and his excessively-long
nose hairs.
101
00:04:00,457 --> 00:04:02,894
-[RIMSHOT PLAYS]
-Yeah, not my sense of humor.
102
00:04:02,981 --> 00:04:06,071
I mean, this guy is old!
He's got more wrinkles
103
00:04:06,158 --> 00:04:08,857
than an accordion wearing
a pair of linen pants.
104
00:04:08,944 --> 00:04:10,772
Okay! I don't
have to take this!
105
00:04:10,859 --> 00:04:12,164
But, that's enough out of me.
106
00:04:12,252 --> 00:04:14,254
Let's hear from
the man of the hour.
107
00:04:15,429 --> 00:04:16,691
Look at that, folks.
108
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He's only been
married five minutes,
109
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and he already knows
to keep his mouth shut.
110
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-[GRUNTS]
-[GIGGLING MANIACALLY]
111
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[GRUNTING ANGRILY]
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MR. BRIARWOOD:
Now, if everyone would please
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join us inside
for the reception.
114
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Ice got your tongue? I'll make
all your problems melt away.
115
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[STRAINING]
116
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MR. BRIARWOOD:
Ladies and gentlemen,
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Mr. and Mrs. Johnson.
118
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-[EXCLAIMING]
-You can't rush art.
119
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-[GRUNTS]
-Now, you were saying?
120
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The reception... Starting...
121
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Well, let's get
this party started!
122
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[DANCE MUSIC PLAYING]
123
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[GROANS ANGRILY]
124
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Y'all ready for plates?
125
00:04:55,817 --> 00:04:57,949
Hey!
126
00:04:58,036 --> 00:05:00,517
[GRUNTING] Gotcha!
Any last words?
127
00:05:00,604 --> 00:05:02,214
How about, "Ka-boom"?
128
00:05:05,914 --> 00:05:07,655
[ALL CHEERING]
129
00:05:07,742 --> 00:05:09,439
Congratulations, Mr. Duck.
130
00:05:09,526 --> 00:05:12,747
You've made my daughter's
special day even more special.
131
00:05:12,834 --> 00:05:15,402
No problem, chief.
It was a piece of cake.
132
00:05:15,489 --> 00:05:17,099
Oh, thank you.
133
00:05:17,186 --> 00:05:19,319
How would you
like to be Event Manager?
134
00:05:19,406 --> 00:05:21,016
I'd be delighted.
135
00:05:21,103 --> 00:05:23,801
[GASPS] You're making
the duck Event Manager?
136
00:05:23,888 --> 00:05:26,021
[SCREAMING] I want
to be the manager!
137
00:05:26,108 --> 00:05:27,849
Take this plate
to the kitchen and clean it.
138
00:05:27,936 --> 00:05:29,764
Think you can manage that?
139
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Yes, Mr. Briarwood.
140
00:05:31,505 --> 00:05:34,595
Hey! Look at that! Woo-hoo!
141
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Always the bridesmaid,
never the Event Manager.
142
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[MELLOW MUSIC PLAYS]
143
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Welcome to Gettin' Fresh,
with me, Ivana.
144
00:06:02,187 --> 00:06:03,841
Today, we're coming
to you live,
145
00:06:03,928 --> 00:06:05,843
from the middle of the forest,
where I can show you
146
00:06:05,930 --> 00:06:08,585
how to gather
the freshest ingredients
147
00:06:08,672 --> 00:06:10,587
to make a fresh,
delicious meal.
148
00:06:10,674 --> 00:06:12,720
Follow me.
149
00:06:12,807 --> 00:06:15,157
Today, we're preparing
root veggies.
150
00:06:15,244 --> 00:06:18,552
Fresh rutabaga,
fresh parsnips, fresh beets,
151
00:06:18,639 --> 00:06:20,989
and of course, fresh carrots.
152
00:06:22,730 --> 00:06:24,035
[STRAINING]
153
00:06:25,907 --> 00:06:27,952
Stand by,
ladies and gentlemen.
154
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[ALARM BELL RINGS]
155
00:06:29,345 --> 00:06:30,651
You're ruining my show!
156
00:06:30,738 --> 00:06:32,174
You're ruining my garden.
157
00:06:32,261 --> 00:06:34,916
Your garden is my dinner.
Now, get lost!
158
00:06:35,003 --> 00:06:36,961
[GRUNTS]
159
00:06:37,048 --> 00:06:40,182
That cook
is about to get burned.
160
00:06:40,269 --> 00:06:43,881
-[CHANTING] Fresh. Fresh.
-[ALARM BELL RINGS]
161
00:06:43,968 --> 00:06:45,883
Welcome back.
162
00:06:45,970 --> 00:06:47,711
One of the most important
parts of cooking
is to make sure
163
00:06:47,798 --> 00:06:51,193
your space and utensils
are clean and germ-free.
164
00:06:51,280 --> 00:06:54,544
Nothing ruins freshness more
than germs, dirt and grime.
165
00:06:54,631 --> 00:06:58,069
Huh? Dirt!
But, I... Oh. [CHUCKLES]
166
00:06:58,156 --> 00:06:59,723
Well, no harm done.
167
00:06:59,810 --> 00:07:02,160
That's why it's a good idea
to double-check.
168
00:07:02,247 --> 00:07:04,859
Make sure everything
is spick-and-span.
169
00:07:04,946 --> 00:07:07,470
More dirt! How in the...
170
00:07:10,168 --> 00:07:11,866
[GROANING]
171
00:07:11,953 --> 00:07:14,564
In order
to maintain freshness,
172
00:07:14,651 --> 00:07:18,002
it's important to keep
your workstation clean.
173
00:07:18,089 --> 00:07:20,788
[CHUCKLES] There.
Now, we can begin...
174
00:07:20,875 --> 00:07:23,225
Oh, for crying out loud!
175
00:07:23,312 --> 00:07:25,401
No, no, no, no, no,
no, no, no, no!
176
00:07:25,488 --> 00:07:27,403
-Hmm? [GROWLS]
-[SNEEZES]
177
00:07:27,490 --> 00:07:30,841
[GROWLING]
178
00:07:30,928 --> 00:07:34,410
Forget it! I just won't use
a cutting board and a knife.
179
00:07:34,497 --> 00:07:36,543
All I need is
a boon and a spowl...
180
00:07:36,630 --> 00:07:38,196
I mean, a pool and a bown...
181
00:07:38,283 --> 00:07:40,547
Oh, you know what I mean!
[CHUCKLES]
182
00:07:40,634 --> 00:07:43,550
Oh! These are dirty, too!
[SCREAMS]
183
00:07:43,637 --> 00:07:45,203
[MELLOW MUSIC PLAYS]
184
00:07:45,290 --> 00:07:47,075
-[ALARM BELL RINGS]
-We're back.
185
00:07:47,162 --> 00:07:50,034
Don't worry about cutting
up your veggies and roots.
186
00:07:50,121 --> 00:07:51,427
You can cook them whole...
187
00:07:51,514 --> 00:07:53,516
We have to take some
audience questions, now.
188
00:07:53,603 --> 00:07:56,084
Adjust the lights.
Her face is starting
to look a little leathery.
189
00:07:56,171 --> 00:07:59,087
Huh? Uh, uh... Oh, I guess now
is the part of the show
190
00:07:59,174 --> 00:08:01,568
where I take questions
from the audience.
191
00:08:01,655 --> 00:08:03,570
Uh, yes. You, with the glove?
192
00:08:03,657 --> 00:08:05,006
Hey, Ivana. Uh, big fan.
193
00:08:05,093 --> 00:08:06,877
Longtime watcher,
first-time caller.
194
00:08:06,964 --> 00:08:09,358
I was wondering, uh,
how you gonna prepare
those carrots?
195
00:08:09,445 --> 00:08:11,099
Good question.
196
00:08:11,186 --> 00:08:13,362
To preserve the freshness,
it's best to prepare them...
197
00:08:13,449 --> 00:08:15,016
BUGS: Now, since we're
talking about preparing,
198
00:08:15,103 --> 00:08:16,974
how do I prepare
for my math test?
199
00:08:17,061 --> 00:08:19,629
This is a cooking show.
I don't know about tests.
200
00:08:19,716 --> 00:08:20,978
BUGS: And since
we're talking about tests,
201
00:08:21,065 --> 00:08:22,414
in a test of strength,
202
00:08:22,502 --> 00:08:23,677
how many push-ups
do you think I can do?
203
00:08:23,764 --> 00:08:25,287
One, two, three, four, five...
204
00:08:25,374 --> 00:08:27,115
How long do you think
I can scream?
205
00:08:27,202 --> 00:08:28,725
How many geese
are in a gaggle?
206
00:08:28,812 --> 00:08:30,292
What's the difference
between a frog and a toad?
207
00:08:30,379 --> 00:08:32,250
Can you take a look
at this mole on my back?
208
00:08:32,337 --> 00:08:34,339
[YELLING] Silence!
209
00:08:34,426 --> 00:08:36,211
-[DOORBELL RINGS]
-Is that a doorbell?
210
00:08:37,821 --> 00:08:39,388
-How did that...
-[DOORBELL RINGING]
211
00:08:39,475 --> 00:08:41,477
Okay, hold your horses.
212
00:08:41,564 --> 00:08:43,305
-Howdy, neighbor.
-What do you want?
213
00:08:43,392 --> 00:08:45,829
I'm doing a television show!
[TEETH GRINDING]
214
00:08:45,916 --> 00:08:48,136
I was hoping I could
borrow a cup of sugar.
215
00:08:48,223 --> 00:08:49,964
Oh, well, of course.
216
00:08:50,051 --> 00:08:51,792
It's the neighborly
thing to do.
217
00:08:51,879 --> 00:08:53,837
Here! Now, where was I?
218
00:08:53,924 --> 00:08:55,665
Oh, yes. Freshness...
219
00:08:55,752 --> 00:08:57,449
Eh, how about a cup of milk?
220
00:08:57,537 --> 00:08:59,626
Yes. Of course.
221
00:08:59,713 --> 00:09:02,106
Cup of salt? Cup of pepper?
Cup of coffee?
222
00:09:02,193 --> 00:09:03,978
Cup-and-ball game?
223
00:09:04,065 --> 00:09:06,197
-The Stanley Cup?
-[STRAINING]
224
00:09:06,284 --> 00:09:09,287
Couple of bucks?
The lost cup of Ali Baba?
225
00:09:09,374 --> 00:09:10,767
Cup of noodles?
Cup of doodles?
226
00:09:10,854 --> 00:09:14,249
-Cup of poodles?
-[SCREAMING] Enough!
227
00:09:14,336 --> 00:09:15,772
[PANTING] Now,
as I was saying...
228
00:09:15,859 --> 00:09:17,426
-[DOORBELL RINGS]
-[SCREAMING] What?
229
00:09:19,080 --> 00:09:21,822
-Got any cup-holders?
-[TEETH GRINDING]
230
00:09:21,909 --> 00:09:23,127
You don't look so good.
231
00:09:23,214 --> 00:09:24,825
I know what'll
fix you right up.
232
00:09:24,912 --> 00:09:26,740
A nice, fresh meal.
233
00:09:27,741 --> 00:09:29,960
Why, you... [GROANS]
234
00:09:30,047 --> 00:09:31,832
That bruise looks fresh.
235
00:09:31,919 --> 00:09:33,790
[MELLOW MUSIC PLAYS]
236
00:09:33,877 --> 00:09:35,313
[GROANING]
237
00:09:35,400 --> 00:09:38,316
[GASPS] Celebrity chef,
Random Gorsay!
238
00:09:38,403 --> 00:09:40,971
[IN BRITISH ACCENT]
Get off the ground,
you lazy pile of whale phlegm!
239
00:09:41,058 --> 00:09:43,452
If you're not going to cook,
at least toss the salad!
240
00:09:43,539 --> 00:09:45,193
Yes, chef!
Whatever you say, chef!
241
00:09:45,280 --> 00:09:47,456
You call that tossing?
Don't be so gentle.
242
00:09:47,543 --> 00:09:49,066
It's a salad, not a baby!
243
00:09:49,153 --> 00:09:50,938
Yes! Of course, chef.
What was I thinking...
244
00:09:51,025 --> 00:09:53,375
Faster, you miserable
pile of pigeon puke.
245
00:09:53,462 --> 00:09:56,204
Teach me. Mold me.
I am your humble student.
246
00:09:56,291 --> 00:09:59,250
Give me that bowl,
you worthless sack of pig fat!
247
00:09:59,337 --> 00:10:02,079
The great Random Gorsay
called me pig fat!
248
00:10:02,166 --> 00:10:04,299
I can't wait
to tell my friends. [EXCLAIMS]
249
00:10:04,386 --> 00:10:05,648
[WHIRRING]
250
00:10:05,735 --> 00:10:07,650
Now, that's how
you toss a salad.
251
00:10:07,737 --> 00:10:11,741
Wow! I never thought
to prepare salad this way.
252
00:10:11,828 --> 00:10:14,091
Now, we just chill the lettuce
to keep it crisp.
253
00:10:14,178 --> 00:10:17,051
A bit of liquid nitrogen
should do the trick.
254
00:10:17,138 --> 00:10:18,530
And, mix!
255
00:10:18,618 --> 00:10:20,968
-[WHIRRING]
-Yeesh!
256
00:10:22,883 --> 00:10:24,580
Eh. Live and learn.
257
00:10:28,758 --> 00:10:32,022
[TEETH CHATTERING]
I won't let that rabbit
take my freshness.
258
00:10:32,109 --> 00:10:34,982
[IN CREEPY VOICE]
You wants my freshness?
259
00:10:35,069 --> 00:10:36,244
Huh?
260
00:10:36,331 --> 00:10:38,725
BUGS:
It's Trollum's freshness.
261
00:10:38,812 --> 00:10:41,162
Who's there?
[TEETH CHATTERING]
262
00:10:41,249 --> 00:10:45,601
Promises me you won't takes
my freshness.
263
00:10:45,688 --> 00:10:48,560
[SCREAMING]
264
00:10:48,648 --> 00:10:50,040
-Freshness!
-[CAMERA THUDS]
265
00:10:50,127 --> 00:10:51,476
Keep that freshness
away from me!
266
00:10:51,563 --> 00:10:52,913
Keep it away!
267
00:10:53,000 --> 00:10:55,089
Well, that's our showsies.
268
00:10:55,176 --> 00:10:57,091
Tunes insies next weeksies,
269
00:10:57,178 --> 00:11:01,661
when you and Trollum
seeksies the freshness!
19995
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