All language subtitles for Surreal Estate (1976) -- Eduardo de Gregorio

Good afternoon. I'm looking
for a house in the country.

I saw your advertisement
in the paper.

My name is Eric Sange.

Come in.

I hope I haven't got
the wrong address.

It's the only house around here.

I'll just take a
quick look around.

- Is it difficult to heat?
- Terribly.

No-one wants to live
here all the year round.

And with the airport so close...

Does that bother you?

No, I'd completely
forgotten about it.

You can't hear a thing
in the village.

And then, why not?

I could use some noise around me,

so as not to lose touch
completely with the town.

Are you staying at the hotel?

If you can call it a hotel.

But I don't mind.
I like the region.

I hope to come back
here regularly.

- In the winter?
- Whenever I feel like it.

London is much more depressing.

Have you been here long?

Too long.

- What's over here?
- Go up.

Shit! Mind the step. It's
needed repairing for centuries.

My name is Ariane.

- Very apt.
- Why?

You could always go to the beach,

if you're bored,
and the weather's fine.

I hate the sun.

- And I don't like crowds.
- Why live here?

Lying for hours
on a dirty beach,

with some brat clambering
over you. Awful!

You're absolutely right.

What's more, we English
can't bear the sun.

We haven't seen this
room yet, have we?

No. Don't go in there.

Hello? Ariane?

Hello?

Are you here
to see the house?

No. I'd like to see
Miss Ariane.

- Well. And who are you?
- Eric Sange. She knows me.

We'll see. Wait there.

This way, please.

Mr Sange?

- The writer?
- Yes.

I'm Agathe.

Sit down.

I'm listening.

I came to see Ariane.

That's what Céleste told me,
but I thought she'd misunderstood.

Céleste is a treasure,
but a bit eccentric.

It's odd. There's no-one
here of that name.

Perhaps you met her
somewhere else?

You see so many faces
when you're house-hunting.

It was certainly here.

It was Ariane who
showed me round.

It was she who asked me
to come back today.

I don't know what to say.

Yesterday, I had a visitor,
a German businessman.

He liked it a lot, said it would
be a good investment.

- I'm sure. But I must...
- Insist?

No need. I'll show you
the house myself.

The dining room.

Office, library, guest room...

Plenty of room,
as you can see.

You can invite all your friends.

Or you could rent it out
during the summer.

Here we are.

We don't heat this room,
as you can tell.

We have to economise, too.

You see, there are
fireplaces throughout.

A room.

Another room.

Suppose I were to describe
that room to you.

If I told what is in there
and in what condition,

would you believe me then?

- You could try.
- Fine.

Colour... yellow.
Or rather faded orange.

There was a mattress
on the floor by the window.

A large mirror with
an old photograph.

One moment...
Ah, yes.

There was mould
by the left of the door.

It might be a good idea to get
that fixed before selling the house.

I don't know what you were
doing yesterday afternoon,

but I was being shown
around this house.

In the company of
Miss Ariane.

- Incredible.
- What?

I'd always hoped such things
could happen, but it's incredible.

Come on, Céleste is waiting.

- Waiting?
- The tea.

Hurry up, I want to tell
her all about it.

She had a dreamy air,

but it may have been the
lace dress that suggested that.

At the same time,
there was something perverse

even dissolute, about her.

Yes, she had a slightly
lascivious look.

Each gesture, each
inflection was a bit

how shall I say,
over-emphatic.

She thought highly of herself,
but at the same time

she was introverted,
unable to cope with daily life.

As if she felt obliged to
act out a part...

Oh, what lovely details!

Unfortunately,
I don't know her.

And yet you're wearing the
same shoes she had.

Really? It shows
she must have taste.

You have to find this creature.

Supposing we tried
a séance?

We've got a table that
would be perfect.

And Céleste would be
a great medium.

Don't laugh.

I'm sure we can reach her,
even make her appear.

Thank you and goodbye.

Mr Sange...

You know what we'll do?

Come back in an hour.
I'll be out shopping.

I'll arrange for Céleste to be
outside, so you'll be alone.

Perhaps.

You can search for your
mysterious creature.

- But there's a condition.
- What?

- 70 million.
- What?

You don't think that's
a reasonable price?

There's no concrete and glass
and flats everywhere.

It's perfect for a writer.
Remote but not too much.

Just 40 minutes from
Clermont-Ferrand.

70 million!
It's a nice house, but...

I know, the aeroplanes.

After a few days,
you won't even notice them.

My Prussian seemed to find
the price very reasonable.

And besides,
you're a successful writer.

We'll discuss it later, after
your rendez-vous. Tomorrow.

Yes.

But you haven't
given me the key.

Look in your pocket.

Show Mr Sange the way,
Céleste.

Yes, Madame.

What are you doing here?

It's the most desolate
part of the house.

Not for me. It's the only
place I feel comfortable.

In the dark and the
emptiness?

I closed the curtains to keep
out this oppressive daylight.

But it's not empty at all.

It's the room I had
as a child.

This is where I lived.

Surrounded by pictures
of friends...

Excuse me, your Majesty,
but I must introduce you.

Permit me, sire,

to present the Baroness d'Aquila.

There's a costumed ball
tonight, your Majesty.

Don't be shocked if the
baroness comes as Salome.

She's getting on a bit.

And if she wears

a solitary ruby
in her left ear.

while Jean Destiné

wears his earring
on the right.

And his noble young cousin

wears a marvellous
knife handle on his heart.

The Princess of Prague...

has a splendid frontlet

of an extraordinary red.

She's crazy about it.

But one who isn't red at all

is the little Balatin...

Stop all this.

You know what
we're going to do?

We're going to have a look
around the forbidden room,

which appears to
frighten you so much.

My God.

There you are, M Eric.

Are you buying the house?

Don't you agree it's a
unique property?

Isn't this a bit too
much for two people?

It's not too much for four.

How did you come to
live here alone?

Experience. That's
what counts in life.

You look pale, M Eric.

Had a good look around?

You'll see.
We're from Vichy, here.

Although...

There are surprises
every day.

Just look at those tomatoes!

What the hell do I care
about your tomatoes?

I want you to tell me
what's going on here.

They didn't look like that
in the catalogue.

- The thieves!
- Do you live here or not?

You surely know what
this is all about.

The flowers in the garden...

are sad every night...

It's very sad that the
garlic won't grow in this soil.

Do you like garlic?

The things I could tell you...

Things that no-one
could dream of.

This house...

I knew it!
No, don't turn round.

She's watching
from the window.

She mustn't know were talking.

Listen...

Come back tonight,
when everyone's asleep.

I'll leave the service
entrance open.

I'll wait for you in the kitchen.

- You'll know everything.
- What time?

Eleven.

The flowers in the garden
are sad every night...

It's better that I speak
to him myself.

Those girls might
say anything.

You never know with
creatures like that.

But then...
What should I say?

Certainly not the whole truth.
He'd never believe it.

My violence is an act.

What I am, what I think,
secret things, virginity...

Stop it, please.
Tell me what you think.

So you think I'm not
what I am?

No, because if so,
I'd think so too.

You'd think you're not
what you are.

You win, Madame.

Come and help me, ladies.

It's going to rain.
We have to get the washing in.

This house used to
belong to my parents.

My father was quite rich.

And while he lived
we lacked for nothing.

But he didn't have
a head for business.

And you know, the horses...

When he died, he left more
debts than you can imagine.

So everything had to be
sold. Even the house.

That must have been
very difficult for you.

May I offer you some wine?

No, let me get it.
Where is it?

Do you often
think of him?

Never.
It would be too sad.

No. I was very lucky
to be able to stay.

There's a lot of work,

but it's like working
for myself.

- Are you paid regularly?
- Of course.

Why do you ask?

I thought they had
money problems.

Well, they aren't rich.

THEY?
THEY aren't rich?

So there are two?

Leave at once!

Where does their money
come from?

No, I've said too much.

Too much?
You've said nothing at all.

Tell me everything.

First, how did they get
the money to buy this house?

- Tell me!
- They didn't buy it.

When my father died,
it was put up for sale.

Someone bought it. I never
saw who. They never came here.

It was the father of
one of the girls, I think.

And when he died,
they inherited it.

The debts, too.

It was the same story again.

There! That's all there is.

Now you know.
So please go away.

How many other "customers"
have you tried this on?

What the hell do you care?

- Are you a policeman?
- Answer the question.

Listen. Who'd want to live here?

We're in the middle
of nowhere.

It's too big. That's why it's
been on sale for so long.

- Who'd want to live here?
- I'm asking the questions.

Tell me, how do they
make a living?

What kind of work does
Ariane do?

Oh, I don't know.

I hardly see a penny of it.

Oh, it's nothing
to do with me.

I'm beginning to understand.

No need to get upset.

I may have gone
a bit far.

Yes, you did a little.

You gave me a fright.

Since I'm thinking of
buying the house,

your employers will soon have
plenty of income.

But it won't be as
easy as they hoped.

And you, Céleste, if you
want to remain here...

What must I do?

Tomorrow you're going to
help me put a few things straight.

Listen carefully...

The light bothers you.

I think I should start by telling
you about my little ghost hunt.

Is that really necessary,
Mr Sange?

You think we can just ignore it?

- I already have several offers.
- Really?

Two, in particular, are
very interesting.

So why wait?

Attack on several fronts.
It's very simple.

- Do you really need these?
- Do you?

Don't be nosey.
We're talking business.

- You started it.
- Hello...

Is this for Céleste?

Change of plan.
Come on, it's your turn.

- I'm not ready.
- Hurry. Get dressed.

Help me.

Are we going to talk
business or not?

That's what I want to do.

But these lies, these
stories about the house.

Let's drop all the sales
patter about the other buyers.

A German industrialist
indeed!

The other stocking!

Do you really think
you can fool someone

with this little game
of hide-and-seek?

I know you're poor and that
life is hard, but even so...

I know what you are.
You're a sex maniac.

Let me go, and get out.

No, that's not what I meant.

Let's just sit down and
discuss the contract.

We'll have time for that
tomorrow with the solicitor.

We'll settle on a more
reasonable price.

But I'm not sure it's
a good idea

to have that slut wandering
around on the first floor.

That sort of trick doesn't
work with everyone.

I don't understand.

No? Your game fell apart
too quickly.

It's too childish, too tiresome.

Even with two girls
as charming as you, Agathe,

and you, Ariane.

Céleste, you're perfect.

I was just about to call you.

I wondered how Agathe
would get out of this.

You are truly unbelievable.

I didn't expect you to
go so far,

with such a
hare-brained scheme.

You're very clever.

- How did you find out?
- It wasn't difficult.

Seeing Ariane again yesterday,
I understood everything.

What happened?
Tell me everything.

All right. But it's hard
to know where to start.

You're a writer, aren't you?
Start at the beginning.

You arrived as agreed...

I went up to the door.

I opened it.

There was no creak,
no sinister noises.

OK, you opened it. But you
didn't find her right away.

No. I searched all
the ground floor rooms.

Oh, you're impossible.
We'll never get to the end.

You went up.

I found her on the first floor,
in the orange room.

We spoke, or rather she
spoke, very vaguely.

Mysteriously.

About people whom you
never knew existed.

Exactly.

I was impatient, furious with
her, and with you, too.

I dragged her to your room.

Downstairs, by her wrist.

She struggled, but not much.
She undressed quickly,

so that you could see her
naked like a whore.

She came closer, she
pressed herself against me,

and kissed me.

She unzipped you,

and took out your cock,
which swelled in her hands.

She went down
on her knees.

She started to rub you,
like a whore.

She licked your balls.

She said, "Fuck me!"

Me... me...

I undressed her completely.

I kissed her.

I tasted her saliva
in my mouth.

She bit your tongue.

And said, "Do it!"

She threw her head back.

And tasted your tongue.

And then your cock in her throat.

She cried out softly,

and asked for more.

Her voice became higher...

...more childlike.

More childlike.

Moaning and licking,

you bit her all over.

And you fucked her.

Suddenly you were
completely inside her.

She thrust against you,

her body tensing.

You moved faster.

Then...

You came together...

She was full of your juice...

Crying out...

I am not what I am and
you are not what I want...

I'm very upset

that I wasn't told everything.

Don't worry about it.

Now that I've decided
to buy the house,

we'll remove Ariane
from her purgatory.

I won't deny this game of
ghosts has been amusing,

but we're grown-ups.

It's you... you interest
me enormously.

You're going to stay here
with me. That's an order.

If you wish. We'll meet
tomorrow at the solicitor's.

Excellent.

- Until tomorrow.
- Until tomorrow, Eric.

Was it you who sent
Céleste to me?

Are you crazy? This is
between Eric and Madame.

I've had about
enough of this.

It was you who
wanted to come.

You said it would
be like a paid holiday.

Yes, but it's gone
on too long.

It's cold in here.

- You want some?
- No.

Why did you agree to
stay with him?

If I'd refused, it would
have dragged things out.

Well, fortunately,
it'll only take a few days.

You drink too much, Agathe.
You'll get fat.

- You think so?
- Yes, I'm sure.

Well, I have to be going.

My agent says he has
some work for me.

You poor dear.
You really believe that?

We need money
to leave here.

Shit. I'm hungry.
You coming? Shall we eat?

- Yeah.
- The day's work is over.

Can I phone London
from here?

- Anything to drink?
- Calva, please.

A Calva for the gentleman.

- This place needs tidying.
- Very good, Madame.

Mme Céleste.
Such diligence.

But there's not much to do.

Everything's fine, and I'm
very happy with the way...

There's not much time.

I can't find it.

With this, I'll look a bit
more sophisticated.

What were you saying
just now about my lips?

That you weren't doing it
right. I'll show you.

- He's nice, isn't he?
- Yes.

I think so.

Shh. How can I do your
lips if you're talking?

Anyway, he's better than
the guy last summer.

Before, you were saying
you didn't like him.

Yes, but things have changed.

It bothers me that I have
to sign this contract.

Is that OK?
Not too much red?

What could go wrong?

The solicitor is crazy
about Céleste.

He'd set himself on fire
with it if she asked him to.

Have you seen how he
looks at her?

Madame is ravishing today.

What are these
horrible marks?

And on such a nice wall!

That won't do at all.

Everything has to be
clean now.

There, nice and clean.

There, dear.

Today, we'll have a
new master.

And all thanks to whom?

I know, I know.

It's terrible to feel all dirty,
and to be unable to do anything.

I know, you need a
thorough clean.

But I can't.
I'm too busy.

In a few days.
I promise.

The best thing about your
bedroom is the alcove.

I'm sure you'll want
to rearrange everything.

Not really.

- The onions.
- Strange.

Now where's the vinegar?

Very strange.

And maybe children some day.

What's strange?

They accepted a relatively
low price.

It's not the money
they're interested in.

What did you say?

It's not the money
they're interested in.

The chimney's drawing
very well, isn't it?

I've just had it cleaned.

There's something else,
and I have to find out what.

Our new master
seemed preoccupied.

He had too much
on his mind.

But I knew everything
would turn out well.

We were there to
help him.

During dinner, for example,

a few ideas, for them
to suggest to him.

- Good evening.
- Oh, my word!

It was so nice of you
to invite us.

I'm dying of hunger.
What are we eating?

That!

Céleste will show us how to
cook it in the American style.

There's nothing easier.

- That's good, because with
shellfish... - Crustaceans!

With the pollution and
everything...

That's the risk that lobsters
take. He looks fine, doesn't he?

In any case, I want to see
that it's well boiled.

My cruelty only extends
to eating it.

It's Céleste, thank God, who'll
perform the massacre.

Oh, well that shouldn't
be a problem.

Madame has a skilful
hand at that kind of thing.

She can cut a lobster in six
pieces in the blink of an eye,

and pull the head off a chicken.

It won't be like the
executions in Baghdad.

She never missed one
while she was out there.

- You saw beheadings?
- Dozens, of course.

Not dozens, but a few.

Ariane couldn't take it,
but I found it... interesting.

It's all very quick,
unfortunately.

The condemned man is on his
knees, then suddenly - Boom!

He falls over, silently.
Without his head, of course.

The reaction of the crowd
is unbelievable.

The victim's family want revenge
on the family of the condemned.

What morbid taste you have.

- One of your hidden charms.
- Mr Sange, I'm not morbid.

What were you
doing out there?

Ariane's boyfriend was
someone important in Baghdad.

While I'm cooking the lobster
you can be starting on the salad.

Eric, will you help me,
please?

- Will you do as he wants?
- I'm doing what I can.

There should be a drum roll.

- There.
- How horrible!

It's quite simple, Mr Eric.

- Here's the lobster.
- American style.

Sit down and join us,
Madame Céleste.

- I need to undress.
- Some wine?

With pleasure.

You were talking just now
about synthesis in crime novels.

- I thought I was boring you.
- It's so passionate.

It's our ability to produce...

a combination of elements
that are apparently incompatible.

Of course, one must keep
within what is plausible.

Without that, the reader will
throw his book in the bin.

But we want the maximum
diversity in the ingredients.

So... there is great pleasure
in finding that the culprit

is a little girl, or
an old crippled woman,

or an impassive
housekeeper.

All crimes are made up
of ingredients which,

at first sight, seem to
rule themselves out.

Ingredients that are too
unlikely or unexpected.

Like the orang-utan in
Le Crime de la rue Morgue.

Exactly. In that case, it's
a little too implausible.

A monkey that comes down
the chimney. That's too much!

Don't you find it's best
when it's freshly killed?

- Have some more.
- No, thank you.

But I have to say that you sent it
to the afterlife with an expert touch.

Tell me, have you read
Wilkie Collins?

I've read them all.

Which do you prefer?

- I get them all mixed up.
- Well I never.

How about you?

Oh, yes.

Would you like some cheese?
I have some very good goat.

Gruyère, too.

And some Cantal.

Oh, there's no cake.

Stop being so childish.

Yes, we do have cakes,
and fruit...

Could you try to behave
yourselves?

Thank you, Mr Eric.

Why did you say I was morbid?

- Excuse me?
- I love life.

Even in its worst moments.
That's all.

You're a writer. Like me,
you must enjoy...

observing.

I'm tired.
Is my room ready?

Oh, I'm sorry. I was so busy,
I completely forgot.

Don't worry. Just tell me
where to find the bedlinen.

I won't hear of it.
It's my job to look after you.

One thing, at least,
was certain.

He was off on a
new track.

And it was necessary
to encourage him.

There!

As you can see,
it has all mod cons.

It'll be quicker if I help.

When are they leaving?

They don't know
where to go.

With all the money
they have now?

I don't want to speak
out of turn,

but they say one thing
and do another.

They're so strange!

Yes, they are odd.

But that's what
interests me.

But at last, I think
I've found...

What?

You know,
I underestimated her

Who?
Miss Agathe?

Yes.

At first, it was the other.
She seemed the more strange.

And Agathe, by comparison,
was more down-to-earth.

I never suspected.

Were you watching her
during dinner, Céleste?

Yes.

But, you know, with this
sale... She worries me.

Tonight, in the kitchen...

She seemed... voracious.

What do you make of
her tales of executions?

Well, you know, things
work differently in that country.

It's not like over here.

She took such pleasure

in describing what
she wanted to see.

She fascinates me.

She spies on us.

She hides, but she
sees everything.

Like the other day,
in the garden.

Even now, she has her methods.

What do you mean?

Tricks,
secret passageways.

Oh, yes!

I often heard about
them when I was little.

They were constructed
during the Revolution.

Hiding places, hidden
stairways, between the walls...

I never found them myself,
but she knows them.

- And little rooms?
- Oh, yes.

Tiny little rooms
here and there.

That's where she hides
and watches us.

- How? Through the keyholes?
- No.

Through two-way mirrors.

- Goodnight, Céleste.
- Sleep well, Mr Eric.

I drank too much.

I feel awful.
I'm fed up.

Give me the ticket.

Now let me sleep.

Just as I thought.

Agathe! We have to
act tonight.

Tonight?

You must be joking.

What's going on?

What are you waiting for?

She doesn't want to
do anything.

This isn't the time,
young lady.

I've brought everything
you need.

There's not a moment
to lose.

- Can't it wait till tomorrow?
- Tomorrow?

Tomorrow you'll be
a long way from here.

Already?

You know that there's
no other choice.

If it was up to me...

Well, I don't want to.
Do it without me.

If you don't do as you're
told, you'll be the sole culprit.

And I can guarantee
you'll pay dearly.

You heard what she said?
So hurry up.

I don't give a damn!

Listen. We were hired.
It's like a contract.

I don't care.

You get dressed,
and we carry on.

Shit! Can you help me
with all these buttons?

Why can't I take
your place for once?

Are you nuts? Why?

- We've never done that.
- Why not?

Are you completely stupid?
What are you doing?

You always take these
things too seriously.

What could happen?
He's not a monster.

Why should you be the
only one to have fun?

I can't believe you've fallen
in love with Eric. It's ridiculous.

Why not? I do as I
please, after all.

One more reason
to give all this up.

Let's leave tonight.

We can't. We haven't been paid.
What can we do without money?

Anyway, I'm staying.

Because if I love him, as you
say, I can't leave him alone.

I have to talk to him,
explain it to him.

And tonight is the right
moment, I'm sure of it.

I'll take your role, and you take
my place behind the scenes. OK?

Please, Ariane.
Listen to me.

I have a plan.
Everything with be fine.

No.

Ariane...

What are you doing here?

Eric, listen.
It's very important.

We have to run away
together.

There's great danger
if you stay here.

I have a plan...
for later.

Who would have thought it?

That was quite an idea of hers,
to switch places with Ariane.

Now he had to abandon
all his theories,

and replace them with
a single question:

On which side of the mirror
was he standing?

If it were done,
when 'tis done,

then 'twere well
it were done quickly.

If the assassination could
trammel up the consequence,

and catch, with
his surcease, success;

but that this blow might be
the be-all and the end-all,

here, but here, upon
this bank and shoal of time,

we'd jump the life to come.

But in these cases
we still have judgement here;

that we but teach
bloody instruction,

which being taught,
returns to plague the inventor.

He's here in double trust.

First...

Would you tell Miss Ariane
that I'd like to see her.

You want to see her here?

No. Tell her I'll be on the
first floor. She'll understand.

Hello. I'm tidying up.
Did you sleep well?

No.

There's no need to
look so grumpy.

Why not?

Eric, would you pass me
that album, please?

Oh, what a mood!

Here it is.
All my stuff.

I've always liked
cutting out articles.

They're like souvenirs.

Those three albums are all
souvenirs of Baghdad.

In the movies,
this would be the moment

the girl announces that she
adores the silent type.

Don't you think it's a bit early
in the day to start fucking?

That's not what I was thinking.

My dear Eric,
you're ranting.

You shouldn't spoil
other people's day

just because you got out
of bed on the wrong side.

That's the last straw.

All your tales of Baghdad...

All these commonplace...

Do you hear me,
Agathe?

Do you see this?
Do you like this?

I've had enough.
Have you gone mad?

Shall we go over
all the juicy details?

Eric, this is in very bad taste.
You have no right to do that.

Now will you kindly leave.
Because I'm very busy.

Busy? We haven't...

We haven't what?
I don't give a damn!

Oh, but my little Ariane,
if that really is your name,

you're in no position
to take that tone with me.

Even if I'm acting in
the worst possible taste.

What about your own
dirty little habits?

What?

Don't bother to deny it. Each
one of you watching the other,

hiding behind the mirrors.

The mirrors? Yes, it's strange.
There are mirrors everywhere.

You don't deny
everything, then?

OK, that's enough.
Out of the way.

The poor thing.
He was wrong again.

But how could he have
guessed the truth?

Here. The cheque was
cashed as you asked.

Well done.

- Go on.
- No.

Don't lose heart,
my dear.

For the next job,
I'd like to be a redhead.

We'll never get this over
if you just stand there.

Is everything packed away?

Look. You forgot this scarf.

It's Céleste's.

It's very beautiful.
What a pity.

Come and sit down here.

Shit. It's always the
same with this lock.

It never works.

Eric!

It's too late.

She'll always be
stronger than us.

We mustn't get careless.

When is the train?

I'm sorry to bother you,
Mr Eric.

Especially while
you're working.

You were right about the
secret passages,

but as for the mirrors,
I'm not so sure.

I'm afraid I have
some bad news.

- It's that...
- They've left.

Yes. They just vanished.

They seemed to be in a hurry.

- Where did they go?
- To Africa, I think.

- No address?
- They didn't even say goodbye.

They travel a lot, you know.
They may come back.

In fact, I'm sure they'll return.

They can't stay far away
from here for long.

With your permission,
of course.

I think I shall
wait for them.

Mr Eric, I was in the
village this morning.

There have been several
long distance calls for you.

- Would you like to...?
- No, later.

I'll deal with it later.

She'll be so happy!

So happy.

English subtitles by
Kinsayder at KG.