All language subtitles for Lockie.Leonard.S01E10.WEBRip.x264-ION10

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Original subtitles

(fun rock music)

- [Lockie Voiceover] Easter, a time for miracles

but as far as I could tell there weren't many miracles

happening in my part of the world.

This was called good Friday.

Yeah right, it was so good that everything was shot,

even the surf was shot,

flat as a fried egg dropped from a balcony.

The only miracle I could think of was that everybody

wasn't bored to death.

- [Sarge] Boys.

- [Lockie Voiceover] Except Sarge of course,

he was never bored.

- This year we are making our own Easter eggs.

(trumpet blowing)

- They're not Easter eggs.

- But they are Phillip, these are the real deal.

- Dad, Easter eggs are made of chocolate.

- Not round here they're not.

This year our Easter eggs are gonna be hardboiled

hand-painted works of art.

- I hate hardboiled eggs.

- I can't paint those.

- Boys it is the start of a Leonard family tradition.

We're gonna decorate them and give them away.

Let's see what have we got, paint, brushes, bibs.

All I need is a pot of boiling water.

Here's one someone prepared early on.

- Sorry.

- Did you just say bibs as in what babies wear?

- A precautionary device in case you spill paint

on yourselves, this is is gonna be

the most special Leonard family Easter ever.

- Special?

- [Lockie Voiceover] Every time Sarge used the word special

and Leonard in the same sentence, it meant one thing,

embarrassment.

Like the time Sarge started this special Leonard family

advertisement campaign for the blue light disco

and the special Leonard family Christmas pageant

on the busiest street in the universe.

I would have had more fun reaching down my throat

and pulling my own lungs out

and the special Leonard family tree-planting ceremony.

Sarge called dance of life

but Sarge was a special kind of guy

and there's no taking that away from him.

- this will be the most special Leonard family Easter ever,

guaranteed.

- (warbly guitar chord)

(object slamming) (crows cawing)

- [Lockie Voiceover] Mum had that don't muck around

with me look.

- Everything alright there Joy?

Joy?

- I'm just doing a spot of washing.

Hullo, is that the Easter bunny.

Mister Bunny, I'm just ringing to let you know

that the Leonard family will be cancelling Easter this year

until they sort out the problem with their broken-down

useless washing machine, okay?

Thank you so much, you have a lovely day.

Now how's for some tuna patties for breakfast.

(jangly peaceful music)

- [Lockie Voiceover] Good Friday wasn't feeling so good.

But there were three days of Easter to go and even though

I didn't know it, there were going to be ten miracles

by the time those three days were over and I was about

to create the first of them.

(heavy guitar music)

- Hey! You know what's weird?

- No what?

- You live next to the beach for thirteen years

and you still don't know how to swim.

- I've been busy.

- Well good news, I've decided that I'm gonna sacrifice

all the good things I had planned for Easter

and I'm gonna teach you.

- Lockie that is so not happening.

- Why not?

- I hate sharks.

- We'll swim where there aren't any sharks.

- I'm allergic to drowning.

- No one's gonna drown.

- I'm not, n-o-t, I'm not going swimming.

- Lockie, your timing couldn't be better.

In a bit of pickle about Sunday's big sermon.

Easter, you see, the big E, quite an event for

people like me.

The pressure's on, so I decided my sermon should

be about miracles.

- [Lockie Voiceover] I knew it was coming.

- That sounds good dad, really fantastic.

- Well hey since you're both here why don't you

have a listen to what I've written so far

and give me a few pointers especially on the jokes.

I want to be sure my timing's on the money.

- [Lockie Voiceover] Miracle number one...

- Sorry dad, Lockie's gonna teach me how to swim.

- [Lockie Voiceover] Rev's sermon had created a miracle

before he'd even read it.

- Swim?

- You wanna lose the footwear?

Hurry up.

And the socks.

- You gotta promise, not a word to anyone.

(horrific organ chord)

- [Egg] Freaky toes.

- [Lockie Voiceover] I could Egg was pretty sensitive

about his weird toes.

- Man, they belong in a museum.

- Are you gonna teach me to swim or make fun of my feet?

- I promise not another word.

- [Lockie Voiceover] Egg had faith in me from the word go.

He knew I wouldn't let anything happen to him .

- [Egg] Let me drown and I'll never speak to you again.

- Trust me will you? That's what friends do.

They trust each other.

- Come on, come on.

- [Lockie Voiceover] Miracle number two,

Egg took to the water like a baby duck.

Lots of enthusiasm, but no talent.

- I should have done this years ago.

Look at me.

- [Lockie Voiceover] It was her, the hot surfer.

I didn't even know her name but she could still make me

forget important things like what was it?

(aquatic bubbling noises)

- Egg? Egg?

- I was swimming!

- Mate that was called sinking.

I told you not to go out too deep.

This stuff stinks.

- What is it?

- [Lockie Voiceover] Didn't smell real good

and it didn't taste too hot either.

(retching)

You don't wanna watch this, it's really gross.

Here listen to some music.

(classical music)

- So how many times was he sick?

- About ten.

- [Lockie Voiceover] I actually felt okay but I thought

it would be selfish not to let Mum fuss a bit.

She really liked all that stuff.

- (mumbling)

- He said he's fine.

- (mumbling)

- Chucking up made him feel better.

- My tuna patties, maybe the tuna was off or the broccoli.

- No mum, it's because I swallowed half the river.

- What's that smell?

- The other half, which ended up on me.

- I was a natural, Missus L you should have seen me.

- You nearly drowned.

- No way let's do it again, somewhere where there's

no sharks and no slime.

- Great news Joy, found the rabbit, Easter is back on track.

- New washing machine.

- [Lockie Voiceover] It was cancel cleanup week.

Sarge had struck gold, not one washing machine but two

and while he tried to convince mum that he could turn

two broken down machines into one that worked,

Egg and I were on the trail of what made me so sick.

- We need it analysed.

- Takes a lot of work, long hours, I'd have to miss

Captain Chicken.

- Forget tv. Think headlines.

- Yeah, young scientist solves pollution mystery.

Liz would be impressed.

- On one condition, you buy me a proper Easter egg,

chocolate.

- Not a problem.

- Big one?

- Okay

- With nice wrapping

- Okay I promise

(serious action music)

- [Lockie Voiceover] Miracle number three Phillip

proved that he wasn't only interested in blowing things up.

He had a brain for science too.

- [Phillip] After extensive analysis, I have arrived at

three major findings.

First, the oxygen level in the water is very low.

Second, phosphorus is extremely high.

Third, there's an absence of naturally occurring microbes

apart from one type of algae.

- Is there a short answer?

- It's a toxic milkshake.

I'm not surprised you got sick but I'm surprised he didn't.

- I didn't swallow any.

- Good thinking, Lockie.

- We have to do something about this.

- About what?

- The river, it's sicker than I was.

Come on.

- [Lockie Voiceover] I found the perfect cure

for Easter boredom.

- [Egg] Where are we going?

- Rally the troops.

- [Lockie Voiceover] Launch a protest, save our river.

- Don't forget my big chocolate egg.

- [Lockie Voiceover] First up, get our parents fired up.

- [Sarge] The river? Yes that's excellent Locke.

Fighting the good fight.

Little bit tricky at the moment, I'm at a very delicate

stage, I'm balancing the bearings in the spin cycle,

just one sec.

Maybe if you talk to your mum.

- I'd love to help you clean up the river

but I'm very busy.

Hot cross buns but they look so simple in their cellophane

wrappers all cosy on the supermarket shelf

but comes to actually baking them yourself (laughs).

Now is baking soda the same as baking powder

or is that cream of tartar?

- Okay so the river's a big problem

but what about my newsletter for

the national women welders' association?

I'm the secretary it's not even half done.

Is sisterhood one word or two?

- Can we talk about this river thing

after I've worked on my sermon?

Wait wait tell me what you thing of this.

Why did the chicken cross the road?

To get to the Easter egg on the other side (laughs)

What do you think?

I can find another one.

- [Lockie Voiceover] No one wanted to know about the river.

So the next day, Egg and I went to see the one person

I knew we could count on, someone who cared

about the estuary, about the fish, about everything.

- Mister East, we need your help.

- [Lockie Voiceover] One thing we could say about

John East, he was a good listener.

We could go on for ages about how sick the river was

and he didn't interrupt us once.

Then someone else did.

- Uncle John, have you seen my tee shirt?

- [John] Have a look on the line.

Dot, this is Lockie and Jeff.

They're environmental warriors.

- Hi

- Hi

- [John] That's my niece, she and her mum are

staying with me for a while.

- [Lockie Voiceover] Miracle number four, it was her

and finally double miracle, I found out her name,

Dot the surfer girl, living in John East's house.

She was so close I could smell her sunscreen.

- [John] Well boys, I'm impressed with your passion.

It's good to see, wait here.

- [Lockie Voiceover] Egg was impressed with John East too.

He really cared about what we'd been saying.

Right at that moment, my brain decided to go on holiday.

- Here you go, two years ago the government did a study

and gave the local factories two years to stop dumping

their chemicals in the river.

You should take it home and give it a read.

- [Egg] Cool, thanks Mister East.

- [Lockie Voiceover] I couldn't just let her walk past.

I had to say something, something smart, something

sophisticated, something like...

- Find your tee shirt?

(record scratch)

- No.

- [John East] Good luck boys, find your own way out.

I'm going back to bed.

- If we go to my place, we can type out some pamphlets

on the computer.

Lockie?

- Sorry?

- Pamphlets, you know, information to give to people

spread the word that the river's stuffed.

- Um, yeah your place good.

Can I meet you there later?

I just have to do some stuff.

- What stuff?

(rock music)

- I couldn't tell Egg what stuff I had to do

because he wouldn't understand.

I didn't even understand it myself.

I just knew there was something I had to buy from the shops

and it couldn't wait.

I had to buy Dot a new tee shirt.

- That doesn't look like an Easter egg to me.

Easter eggs are round and chocolate.

That looks like a tee shirt.

A girl's tee shirt.

- While Phillip was complaining about me doing my stuff,

everybody else was doing theirs.

(rock music)

(printers running)

- [Sarge] Two trusty machines, abandoned in the wilderness,

left to decay on the side of the road by people with no

imagination, but then resurrection.

(triumphant classical music)

Behold a new beginning.

- I wanted a new machine.

- Joy, they just don't make them like this anymore.

Trust me.

Give it a try.

(whistling)

yes, that is absolutely miraculous.

Beautiful work, well done, wonderful job.

Who wouldn't rather get one of these unique masterpieces

than a silly old chocolate egg?

- It works.

- Have you called the Easter bunny back, mum?

- [Lockie Voiceover] Miracle number five, Sarge couldn't

do a three piece jigsaw puzzle, but me managed to make

the washing machine work.

The miracle I wanted was for Dot to think the tee shirt

was the best Easter present ever

but after I bought it, I didn't have enough money left

to buy the wrapping paper so I had

to think of something else, fast.

(knocking)

- Phillip, will you just go to sleep?

- I have to finish my special Easter card.

- Card?

- Yep, homemade and for someone very special.

- A card? I forgot to leave a card with the tee shirt.

How would Dot know it was from me?

Would she even get it?

(techno music)

(Lockie screaming)

- You didn't forget to ring Egg did you?

- What?

- He called.

He wondered where you were.

He said something about pamphlets.

(Lockie groaning)

- Didn't you say you would meet me at my place after

you did your stuff and didn't you also promise to

teach me how to swim.

(Lockie screaming)

- What?

- Nothing?

- Forget something did you?

Like buying me an Easter egg?

- [Lockie Voiceover] I'd forgotten to do so many things

that day.

I needed a whole Easter basket of miracles.

- [Phillip] Lockie, Lockie.

Thanks for the egg, it's perfect.

The Easter bunny brought you one too.

I guess he didn't want you to feel left out.

- [Lockie Voiceover] Miracle number six, the Easter bunny

came and saved my bacon.

- Happy Easter boys.

Look at those beautiful eggs.

What a surprise, don't tell Sarge.

Who's for some of my homemade hot cross buns.

(church bell ringing)

- It's the reason we're all here, sitting down, celebrating

Easter.

It's the magnet that draws us all together.

It's the main event...

- Where were you?

- Sorry. Stuff time.

- I made the pamphlet myself and it sucks.

- [Rev] And the reason why it's such a powerful

draw is because the river sucks.

It's polluted and somebody's got to fix it before we all

start chucking our guts up.

- [Lockie Voiceover] Miracle number seven, somehow

Egg's pamphlet had gotten mixed up with the Rev's sermon

and the whole town got to know about our protest.

- I seem to have...

- Sounded pretty good to me, in fact I'm impressed.

- The chucking bit isn't too over the top?

- And Egg didn't hate me anymore for forgetting to help him

and I realised right then what a good friend he was.

- Let's just start over.

I've spent so much time working on this sermon, writing,

rewriting, trying to get it right but Easter isn't

about anyone getting something wrong or right.

It's about much simpler things, renewal, joy, and hope.

So why are we all here today?

Well it seems to me that this question

is as simple as asking why did the chicken cross the road?

Answer, to get to the Easter egg on the other side.

(congregation laughing)

- [Lockie Voiceover] Miracle number eight, the Rev's sermon

turned out to be a winner.

After all that stress, he just made it up as he went along.

- I hear you're teaching egg how to swim.

- Yeah sort of.

- I think that's really nice.

- Vicky, happy Easter.

- Oh thanks, it's beautiful.

- [Lockie Voiceover] She was right.

It was beautiful, Sarge's special Leonard Easter eggs

were a huge hit.

- Just give your niece a little Easter Sarge.

And Sarge, best Easter ever.

- That's when I decided to create

my own special Leonard moment.

Miracle number nine, I made a swimming machine

out of leftovers from Sarge's old washing machines.

Plus a few other bits and pieces which kept Egg

safe from sharks in the harbour, away from

the pollution in the river, and he swam sorta

for the first time.

(dramatic guitar chord)

miracle number ten, Sarge was right.

It was the most special Easter I've ever had.

- Come on.

- [Egg] This is wicked.

(fun rock music)

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