All language subtitles for Some Assembly Required s03e07 Unicorpse

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Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:00:37,740 --> 00:00:39,500 Just tell Piper how you feel! 2 00:00:41,400 --> 00:00:42,660 Louie, why are you here? 3 00:00:43,200 --> 00:00:46,580 According to my mom, a series of poor decisions she made in her early 20s. 4 00:00:48,580 --> 00:00:50,740 I keep telling you, Piper likes you back. 5 00:00:51,080 --> 00:00:54,340 But what if she doesn't? I'll end up a lonely, pathetic loser that no one wants 6 00:00:54,340 --> 00:00:55,259 to be around. 7 00:00:55,260 --> 00:00:56,260 You're that now! 8 00:00:57,780 --> 00:00:59,040 And that's my gig. 9 00:01:00,170 --> 00:01:01,910 Watch, I'll prove Piper's into you. 10 00:01:02,550 --> 00:01:03,950 What? No! 11 00:01:06,470 --> 00:01:08,190 Piper, are you in love with Jarvis? 12 00:01:09,850 --> 00:01:14,910 She nodded. She nodded! She must really love you because she's still nodding. 13 00:01:18,090 --> 00:01:19,770 Sorry, did you say something? 14 00:01:20,110 --> 00:01:21,190 I'm listening to music. 15 00:01:21,850 --> 00:01:23,670 With my Bowie-canceling headphones. 16 00:01:24,790 --> 00:01:27,740 Actually... Jarvis has something he wants to tell you. Something he's been 17 00:01:27,740 --> 00:01:29,200 wanting to tell you for a long time. 18 00:01:29,440 --> 00:01:30,419 Oh. 19 00:01:30,420 --> 00:01:31,420 Okay. 20 00:01:32,000 --> 00:01:33,000 What is it, Jarvis? 21 00:01:34,100 --> 00:01:35,280 Uh... Go on, tell her. 22 00:01:37,640 --> 00:01:40,500 Piper... I love you. 23 00:01:42,620 --> 00:01:44,720 Unicorns! I love unicorns! 24 00:01:46,040 --> 00:01:48,180 Wow, it takes a big man to admit that. 25 00:01:48,940 --> 00:01:49,940 Or a little girl. 26 00:01:53,020 --> 00:01:54,880 I love unicorns? 27 00:01:55,320 --> 00:01:58,040 At this rate, you have a better chance of ending up with one of them than with 28 00:01:58,040 --> 00:02:01,480 Piper. By the way, if you do end up dating a unicorn, see if she has a 29 00:02:01,480 --> 00:02:02,720 mermaid friend for me. 30 00:02:03,940 --> 00:02:05,520 Ideally, top half fish. 31 00:02:06,380 --> 00:02:07,500 I like a nice dorsal fin. 32 00:02:24,540 --> 00:02:29,300 Through all the ups and all the downs, we'll always find a way around. 33 00:02:29,720 --> 00:02:31,020 So here we go. 34 00:02:31,840 --> 00:02:33,760 Here we go. 35 00:03:03,140 --> 00:03:05,280 important assignment Jarvis gave me. 36 00:03:05,500 --> 00:03:08,460 I have to measure the room every day to make sure the building's not shrinking. 37 00:03:12,620 --> 00:03:13,700 That's not important. 38 00:03:14,540 --> 00:03:15,660 Maybe not to you. 39 00:03:16,080 --> 00:03:17,080 You're tiny. 40 00:03:18,000 --> 00:03:22,020 I mean, Jarvis and Piper give you useless, busy work so you'll stay out of 41 00:03:22,020 --> 00:03:22,599 the way. 42 00:03:22,600 --> 00:03:23,720 That's not true. 43 00:03:24,320 --> 00:03:26,340 Have they ever asked you to design a toy? 44 00:03:26,560 --> 00:03:29,380 No, but that's usually because I'm too busy measuring... 45 00:03:32,869 --> 00:03:35,610 Jarvis and Piper don't think I can design a toy. 46 00:03:35,910 --> 00:03:41,270 But this is your chance to show them by going away for as long as it takes and 47 00:03:41,270 --> 00:03:44,190 designing a toy Jarvis and Piper will love. 48 00:03:44,470 --> 00:03:45,470 Thanks, Aster. 49 00:03:45,690 --> 00:03:49,750 I really appreciate being given an assignment that matters instead of being 50 00:03:49,750 --> 00:03:52,510 sent off just because someone wants to get rid of me. 51 00:03:55,530 --> 00:03:59,750 You wanted to see me? No one ever wants to see me. 52 00:04:00,280 --> 00:04:02,720 I'm surprised they don't make Bowie canceling sunglasses. 53 00:04:05,720 --> 00:04:06,920 Oh, Bowie, you're here. 54 00:04:08,300 --> 00:04:10,740 Good. I finally figured out how to woo her. 55 00:04:11,120 --> 00:04:12,940 Thanks, but I already know what to say. 56 00:04:13,960 --> 00:04:18,579 Yes, I am of the land and you are of the sea, but we can make it work. 57 00:04:19,180 --> 00:04:21,680 Sure, I can't swim, but I have floaties. 58 00:04:22,940 --> 00:04:24,600 Not the mermaid. 59 00:04:26,740 --> 00:04:28,280 I'm talking about me and Piper. 60 00:04:28,800 --> 00:04:30,640 I'm working on a song that will tell her how I feel. 61 00:04:31,200 --> 00:04:33,340 Guys have been winning girls' hearts with love songs forever. 62 00:04:33,620 --> 00:04:34,740 Well, let's hear what you got so far. 63 00:04:44,160 --> 00:04:48,600 You fill my heart, Piper Like a baby fills a diaper 64 00:04:48,600 --> 00:04:52,100 That's a terrible song. 65 00:04:52,880 --> 00:04:55,440 Diapers aren't just for babies. I'm sick of people thinking that! 66 00:04:59,470 --> 00:05:02,790 Dude, check it out. I designed a toy Jarvis will love. 67 00:05:03,070 --> 00:05:04,070 Already? 68 00:05:05,090 --> 00:05:09,730 Yep. Word around the office is Jarvis loves unicorns. So I designed a toy. 69 00:05:10,550 --> 00:05:11,570 Wait for it. 70 00:05:12,230 --> 00:05:13,230 Unicorn? 71 00:05:13,450 --> 00:05:14,450 Yeah. 72 00:05:14,750 --> 00:05:15,750 Tell me what you think. 73 00:05:15,970 --> 00:05:16,970 Ow! 74 00:05:17,090 --> 00:05:18,990 Lux, now I can't see out of this eye. 75 00:05:19,490 --> 00:05:21,170 Then take a look with your other eye. 76 00:05:21,490 --> 00:05:23,710 Ow! Now I can't see anything. 77 00:05:24,930 --> 00:05:28,570 But you were supposed to design a toy Jarvis and Piper would both like. 78 00:05:28,910 --> 00:05:31,570 As we all know, Jarvis loves unicorns. 79 00:05:31,870 --> 00:05:34,370 But Piper doesn't. 80 00:05:35,590 --> 00:05:36,590 You're right. 81 00:05:37,230 --> 00:05:41,850 Those two have nothing in common. They would make a terrible couple. 82 00:05:42,630 --> 00:05:47,350 Luckily, that's not an issue because Jarvis loves unicorns, not Piper. 83 00:05:50,810 --> 00:05:53,410 Okay, I'm here, Jarvis. What did you want me to see? 84 00:05:53,710 --> 00:05:57,390 This. Yo, DJ Bubstead, drop that beat. 85 00:06:00,120 --> 00:06:06,960 Perfection, that's what you are Center of attention, deep down in 86 00:06:06,960 --> 00:06:13,200 my heart And girl, I should mention, you're like a work of art Yeah, you 87 00:06:13,200 --> 00:06:19,240 don't need no photoshop, beautiful the way you are The way that you move, the 88 00:06:19,240 --> 00:06:24,200 way you do you, got my hands spinning The way that you rock, the way that you 89 00:06:24,200 --> 00:06:26,300 talk, got me singing 90 00:06:29,550 --> 00:06:31,310 prettiest girl that I ever seen. 91 00:06:33,050 --> 00:06:35,630 Straight from the cover of a magazine. 92 00:06:35,950 --> 00:06:40,410 So what's it gonna take y'all? What I gotta do? Tell me how to make y'all my 93 00:06:40,410 --> 00:06:44,910 beauty queen. 94 00:06:49,290 --> 00:06:54,550 She was so cool. Never wanna play by the old rule I put her on a pedestal, but I 95 00:06:54,550 --> 00:06:58,890 was okay with that kind of vibe to take me back And she was so sweet. She's the 96 00:06:58,890 --> 00:07:02,510 prettiest girl that I ever seen. So I know I gotta treat her like a beauty 97 00:07:02,510 --> 00:07:07,470 queen You're the prettiest girl that I ever seen 98 00:07:07,470 --> 00:07:11,850 Straight from the cover of a magazine. 99 00:07:12,130 --> 00:07:15,710 So what's it gonna take ya? What I gotta do? Tell me how to make ya 100 00:07:19,530 --> 00:07:21,130 Yeah, my beauty queen. 101 00:07:21,670 --> 00:07:25,890 My beauty queen. You're my beauty queen. 102 00:07:36,930 --> 00:07:40,050 So, what did you think of the song? 103 00:07:40,390 --> 00:07:43,950 I think... Geneva will love it. 104 00:07:44,530 --> 00:07:46,130 You think the song is for Geneva? 105 00:07:46,510 --> 00:07:49,930 Obviously, who else... What else would like a superficial song that reduces the 106 00:07:49,930 --> 00:07:53,290 value of a woman to just her looks, ignoring who she really is as a person? 107 00:07:54,370 --> 00:07:55,370 Not you? 108 00:07:57,050 --> 00:08:00,110 No, I would never want someone to write a song like that for me. 109 00:08:00,750 --> 00:08:02,550 Yep, the song's for Geneva. 110 00:08:03,690 --> 00:08:05,530 I didn't even know you were still into her. 111 00:08:05,850 --> 00:08:06,850 I'm not. 112 00:08:07,030 --> 00:08:09,710 This is... Bowie's song. 113 00:08:10,650 --> 00:08:11,770 He wrote it for her. 114 00:08:12,010 --> 00:08:13,010 He sings it. 115 00:08:13,070 --> 00:08:14,930 Really? It sounded like you. 116 00:08:15,210 --> 00:08:17,130 I was just lip syncing in a mocking way. 117 00:08:17,790 --> 00:08:22,910 to mock this song for its mock-worthy, un-feminist-y... stuff. 118 00:08:24,950 --> 00:08:29,270 Oh, of course, you were mocking it. That explains all those goofy dance moves. 119 00:08:31,830 --> 00:08:32,829 Yeah, goofy. 120 00:08:48,610 --> 00:08:50,070 Mother's Day shopping? Done. 121 00:08:53,770 --> 00:08:57,150 Bowie, if anyone asks, you wrote and recorded Beauty Queen for Geneva. 122 00:08:57,350 --> 00:09:00,150 All right, but no one ever asks me things. They just tell me things, like, 123 00:09:00,230 --> 00:09:03,770 stop it! Or, if anyone asks, you wrote and recorded Beauty Queen for Geneva. 124 00:09:05,630 --> 00:09:07,170 You wrote a song for me? 125 00:09:07,570 --> 00:09:08,570 How does it go? 126 00:09:09,530 --> 00:09:12,910 Um... It goes... like this. 127 00:09:14,750 --> 00:09:17,230 You fill my heart, Geneva 128 00:09:18,240 --> 00:09:20,820 Like anyone fills a diaper. 129 00:09:22,400 --> 00:09:24,660 No, no, that's not how it goes, Bowie. 130 00:09:24,960 --> 00:09:31,400 Remember, it's more like... You're the prettiest girl that I've ever seen. 131 00:09:32,900 --> 00:09:35,040 Straight from the cover of a magazine. 132 00:09:35,340 --> 00:09:41,500 So what's I gotta take ya, what I gotta do? Tell me how to make ya... My 133 00:09:41,500 --> 00:09:42,800 beauty queen. 134 00:09:47,370 --> 00:09:48,950 Not the dance moves, they were goofy. 135 00:09:50,130 --> 00:09:52,090 But the song is so romantic. 136 00:09:52,970 --> 00:09:55,710 It just makes me want to... 137 00:09:55,710 --> 00:10:03,910 Wait, 138 00:10:04,050 --> 00:10:05,110 what does it make you want to do? 139 00:10:09,230 --> 00:10:12,970 I came up with a new toy I think Jarvis and Piper will like. 140 00:10:13,370 --> 00:10:14,370 Already? 141 00:10:15,560 --> 00:10:20,780 As everyone knows, Jarvis loves unicorns, and Piper loves zombies, so I 142 00:10:20,780 --> 00:10:21,860 put the two of them together. 143 00:10:22,080 --> 00:10:24,860 Not Jarvis and Piper. That would be crazy. 144 00:10:26,440 --> 00:10:28,760 You combined a unicorn and a zombie? 145 00:10:29,040 --> 00:10:30,540 Yeah, unicorns. 146 00:10:32,840 --> 00:10:36,020 You actually did it. You created something they'll both love. 147 00:10:36,540 --> 00:10:38,380 I guess that means I'm useful now. 148 00:10:38,580 --> 00:10:40,400 Maybe I can help you with what you're working on. 149 00:10:41,360 --> 00:10:44,660 You know, now that I look at this toy, I'm not so sure it's perfect. 150 00:10:44,880 --> 00:10:47,680 I mean, have you ever seen a real unicorn? 151 00:10:48,720 --> 00:10:51,480 No. How do you know this is realistic? 152 00:10:52,140 --> 00:10:55,080 Were you saying I need to compare this to a real unicorn? 153 00:10:55,640 --> 00:10:58,500 Only if you want Jarvis and Piper to like your toy. 154 00:11:00,380 --> 00:11:01,380 I do. 155 00:11:01,860 --> 00:11:05,620 I won't stop searching until I find a real live unicorn. 156 00:11:07,480 --> 00:11:09,160 That's what I was hoping you'd say. 157 00:11:11,880 --> 00:11:15,140 Hey Jarvis, I put Beauty Queen on YouTunes and they sent me a royalty 158 00:11:15,140 --> 00:11:17,400 check. Which I guess means I'm royalty now. 159 00:11:18,300 --> 00:11:19,199 Oh wee. 160 00:11:19,200 --> 00:11:20,820 That's your highness, you peasant! 161 00:11:23,880 --> 00:11:25,540 Whoa, that's a lot of money. 162 00:11:25,760 --> 00:11:27,240 How many people listen to my song? 163 00:11:27,500 --> 00:11:30,080 None. But a ton of people listen to my song. 164 00:11:31,240 --> 00:11:32,240 Your song? 165 00:11:32,360 --> 00:11:34,460 I wrote and recorded Beauty Queen for Geneva. 166 00:11:35,240 --> 00:11:36,240 My girlfriend! 167 00:11:39,560 --> 00:11:41,140 You found me, Gigi. 168 00:11:42,780 --> 00:11:45,180 Bobo, Gigi. Yes, Jar Jar? 169 00:11:46,700 --> 00:11:47,880 Your boy's girlfriend? 170 00:11:48,200 --> 00:11:52,440 Yeah. I mean, he wrote that amazing song about me. 171 00:11:52,880 --> 00:11:55,320 It's crazy to think we just met yesterday. 172 00:12:02,740 --> 00:12:05,980 You're getting rich and dating Geneva because of my song? 173 00:12:07,120 --> 00:12:10,220 Well... At least I didn't ruin my chances of getting together with Piper. 174 00:12:10,920 --> 00:12:12,560 Hey, I was wondering if we could get together. 175 00:12:13,060 --> 00:12:14,820 Yes, I would love to get together with you. 176 00:12:15,780 --> 00:12:17,080 I was talking to Bowie. 177 00:12:17,760 --> 00:12:18,760 McCorn. 178 00:12:20,200 --> 00:12:22,580 I'm working on a new song and was wondering if you could help me. 179 00:12:22,820 --> 00:12:23,820 You want his help? 180 00:12:24,300 --> 00:12:25,660 I thought you hated my song. 181 00:12:26,200 --> 00:12:28,520 That Bowie wrote for Geneva. 182 00:12:29,880 --> 00:12:34,500 I hate the lyrics of your song that Bowie wrote for Geneva. 183 00:12:35,290 --> 00:12:36,630 But musically, it's great. 184 00:12:36,890 --> 00:12:37,890 It's so catchy. 185 00:12:38,190 --> 00:12:39,210 Really? You think so? 186 00:12:39,870 --> 00:12:43,850 You know, if you pay close attention to the lyrics, you can tell that the 187 00:12:43,850 --> 00:12:48,630 composer uses beauty not only to refer to physical appearance, but also inner 188 00:12:48,630 --> 00:12:49,629 beauty. 189 00:12:49,630 --> 00:12:50,830 Beauty of the spirit. 190 00:12:51,470 --> 00:12:53,290 Nope, I wrote it about Geneva's hot looks. 191 00:12:58,750 --> 00:13:01,990 Aster, I spent the entire day looking everywhere for a unicorn. 192 00:13:02,510 --> 00:13:03,670 Well, keep at it. 193 00:13:04,760 --> 00:13:06,320 Why? I found one. 194 00:13:08,280 --> 00:13:10,640 What? Is this thing real? 195 00:13:10,880 --> 00:13:12,060 Take a look for yourself. 196 00:13:16,320 --> 00:13:17,320 Ow! 197 00:13:19,020 --> 00:13:20,020 Wow! 198 00:13:21,300 --> 00:13:24,380 His horn poked you in the eye just like this thing's did. 199 00:13:24,720 --> 00:13:25,720 Ow! 200 00:13:30,860 --> 00:13:32,180 Thank you, Aster. 201 00:13:32,880 --> 00:13:35,200 You pushed me to make this toy perfect. 202 00:13:36,140 --> 00:13:37,480 And I guess you did. 203 00:13:38,820 --> 00:13:39,900 It's pretty accurate. 204 00:13:40,480 --> 00:13:41,480 Valid criticism. 205 00:13:41,840 --> 00:13:43,480 It is only pretty accurate. 206 00:13:44,580 --> 00:13:45,580 Unicorps isn't alive. 207 00:13:45,900 --> 00:13:50,520 You're saying if I want to make a true comparison, I need to kill this unicorn. 208 00:13:51,220 --> 00:13:54,020 I'm not saying that! Anymore. Because you already did. 209 00:13:58,520 --> 00:14:00,880 I'm trying to write a new song, but I can't quite crack it. 210 00:14:01,120 --> 00:14:02,200 Do you think you could help me? 211 00:14:02,510 --> 00:14:03,510 I'll try. 212 00:14:09,130 --> 00:14:10,870 I think I did more than just crack it. 213 00:14:13,530 --> 00:14:16,870 That should be me hanging out with Piper and Bowie creepily watching us from a 214 00:14:16,870 --> 00:14:17,870 coffin. 215 00:14:20,750 --> 00:14:21,750 It's not right. 216 00:14:22,150 --> 00:14:23,910 Show me how you think I should play it. 217 00:14:33,200 --> 00:14:34,460 a word around the office is true. 218 00:14:34,720 --> 00:14:36,020 You do love zombies. 219 00:14:37,280 --> 00:14:38,740 Back in your coffin, Walker! 220 00:14:40,500 --> 00:14:42,260 Jarvis, Bowie's trying to help me with my music. 221 00:14:42,580 --> 00:14:45,040 Yeah, I just need to talk to him for a minute. 222 00:14:46,280 --> 00:14:47,280 Privately. 223 00:14:50,740 --> 00:14:52,900 I'm spending even less time with Piper now than before. 224 00:14:53,280 --> 00:14:55,880 You need to come clean and admit that you didn't write Beauty Queen so she 225 00:14:55,880 --> 00:14:57,000 goes back to avoiding you. 226 00:14:57,300 --> 00:14:58,320 Like a normal person. 227 00:14:59,540 --> 00:15:00,540 No way. 228 00:15:00,720 --> 00:15:03,620 If Geneva thinks I didn't write this song, she'll break up with me! She 229 00:15:03,620 --> 00:15:04,620 kissed me! 230 00:15:04,640 --> 00:15:07,280 That's the most physical contact I've ever had with another person! 231 00:15:07,980 --> 00:15:09,240 Not including this right here. 232 00:15:16,080 --> 00:15:17,480 Can we get back to work now? 233 00:15:18,840 --> 00:15:19,980 Unhand my bobo. 234 00:15:21,460 --> 00:15:23,040 I wanna take him out tonight. 235 00:15:24,240 --> 00:15:26,420 No, I need him to help me with my song tonight. 236 00:15:28,840 --> 00:15:31,620 Bobo can't hang out with either of you tonight. He's performing a concert on 237 00:15:31,620 --> 00:15:32,720 the roof for all of his fans. 238 00:15:33,040 --> 00:15:34,040 I am? 239 00:15:35,320 --> 00:15:36,320 You're performing here? 240 00:15:36,620 --> 00:15:40,060 I've got to go get the best seats. Not if I get it first, PP. 241 00:15:41,500 --> 00:15:43,220 That's not how you shorten Piper. 242 00:15:43,660 --> 00:15:44,660 I know. 243 00:15:49,580 --> 00:15:53,180 I guess you'll have to admit Beauty Queen is not your song. There's no way 244 00:15:53,180 --> 00:15:54,180 you can perform it live. 245 00:15:54,980 --> 00:15:55,980 Sure I can. 246 00:15:56,000 --> 00:15:57,040 I'll just lip sync. 247 00:15:57,500 --> 00:15:59,960 The hard part will be learning your goofy dance moves. 248 00:16:04,000 --> 00:16:05,560 Nope, not goofy enough. 249 00:16:16,900 --> 00:16:17,900 Hello, 250 00:16:22,240 --> 00:16:26,340 Nick-Nack! I've come all the way from my desk downstairs to be here tonight. 251 00:16:27,100 --> 00:16:33,760 This is a little song called Beauty Queen, which I totally wrote and I'm 252 00:16:33,760 --> 00:16:35,040 totally going to sing live. 253 00:16:35,300 --> 00:16:36,620 Hit it, DJ Bubstep! 254 00:16:47,200 --> 00:16:54,060 Perfection, that's what you are Center of attention, deep 255 00:16:54,060 --> 00:16:55,480 down in my heart 256 00:16:56,420 --> 00:16:58,780 You can go home, Mrs. Bubkiss. Bowie didn't show up. 257 00:16:59,280 --> 00:17:01,820 But I didn't show up without Bowie on stage. 258 00:17:04,599 --> 00:17:05,839 Oopsie. Bubkiss wrong. 259 00:17:12,200 --> 00:17:16,880 Now let's really see how well Bowie can lip sync. 260 00:17:27,800 --> 00:17:29,340 That's my boyfriend! 261 00:17:33,440 --> 00:17:34,440 Sorry, 262 00:17:39,140 --> 00:17:43,300 everyone. I knew I'd blow your minds. I didn't know I'd also blow the circuits. 263 00:17:44,020 --> 00:17:47,060 I guess that means we'll have to cancel the concert and leave here with my 264 00:17:47,060 --> 00:17:48,780 musical genius intact. 265 00:17:50,740 --> 00:17:52,340 We don't have to cancel the concert. 266 00:17:52,540 --> 00:17:56,380 Surely a talented musician like you can do a live acoustic version. 267 00:17:56,830 --> 00:17:57,850 Just you and a piano. 268 00:17:58,230 --> 00:18:00,090 I would, but we don't have a piano. 269 00:18:00,430 --> 00:18:01,570 You're standing next to one. 270 00:18:03,950 --> 00:18:04,970 That's a piano! 271 00:18:07,370 --> 00:18:08,950 Bully! Bully! 272 00:18:09,310 --> 00:18:10,690 Bully! Bully! 273 00:18:22,670 --> 00:18:25,390 Perfection, what would you want? 274 00:18:26,570 --> 00:18:27,650 Center of attention. 275 00:18:29,430 --> 00:18:31,670 Deep down in my heart. 276 00:18:32,190 --> 00:18:36,350 Girl, as I mentioned, you're like a work of art. 277 00:18:36,870 --> 00:18:39,190 You don't need no Photoshop. 278 00:18:39,730 --> 00:18:41,970 Beautiful the way you are. 279 00:18:45,910 --> 00:18:47,970 Knox, you can't kill this unicorn. 280 00:18:48,170 --> 00:18:48,729 Why not? 281 00:18:48,730 --> 00:18:49,790 You want to do it? 282 00:18:53,160 --> 00:18:56,340 This magnificent creature could be the only unicorn on Earth. 283 00:18:56,940 --> 00:19:00,220 Well, we can't keep it. Where are we going to put a unicorn? 284 00:19:01,040 --> 00:19:02,320 Right here, in this room. 285 00:19:02,520 --> 00:19:04,020 This room isn't big enough. 286 00:19:04,280 --> 00:19:05,580 Sure it is. I'll measure it. 287 00:19:06,620 --> 00:19:07,620 Good idea. 288 00:19:07,980 --> 00:19:09,000 You do that. 289 00:19:09,720 --> 00:19:14,860 And really, to find the best place for our unicorn, maybe you should measure 290 00:19:14,860 --> 00:19:16,160 every room in the building. 291 00:19:16,720 --> 00:19:17,800 I will do that. 292 00:19:20,920 --> 00:19:21,920 You drop this. 293 00:19:23,530 --> 00:19:24,530 Thank you. 294 00:19:47,090 --> 00:19:48,490 Bubba, you are amazing! 295 00:19:48,870 --> 00:19:50,730 I love being your beauty queen. 296 00:19:51,110 --> 00:19:52,110 About that. 297 00:19:52,410 --> 00:19:53,510 I can't see you anymore. 298 00:19:53,750 --> 00:19:54,750 Why not? 299 00:19:54,870 --> 00:19:56,830 Did you get poked in the eyes by a unicorn? 300 00:19:57,570 --> 00:19:59,870 Word around the office is that happens a lot. 301 00:20:01,270 --> 00:20:02,950 I mean, we can't date anymore. 302 00:20:03,390 --> 00:20:07,630 Sorry, Gigi, but I'm a superstar now, and I'm not willing to be with one 303 00:20:07,630 --> 00:20:10,550 woman. Especially when I can be with half a woman. 304 00:20:20,630 --> 00:20:21,750 Great performance, huh? 305 00:20:22,040 --> 00:20:23,640 Yeah, Bowie did a great job. 306 00:20:23,920 --> 00:20:24,799 He sure did. 307 00:20:24,800 --> 00:20:26,200 At performing your song. 308 00:20:26,920 --> 00:20:28,440 I know you wrote Beauty Queen. 309 00:20:28,680 --> 00:20:29,399 You do? 310 00:20:29,400 --> 00:20:31,620 Yeah, I should have realized it earlier. 311 00:20:32,200 --> 00:20:36,100 Only you could write something so... passionate. 312 00:20:37,840 --> 00:20:39,680 Plus, Bowie didn't know what a piano was. 313 00:20:41,560 --> 00:20:43,440 Okay, I did write it. 314 00:20:43,640 --> 00:20:44,640 And I know why. 315 00:20:45,140 --> 00:20:46,360 Because you're in love. 316 00:20:47,000 --> 00:20:48,000 Deeply in love. 317 00:20:49,200 --> 00:20:50,200 With Geneva. 318 00:20:51,620 --> 00:20:53,700 She's your beauty queen. No, she's not. 319 00:20:53,920 --> 00:20:55,960 I get it. You're afraid of being rejected. 320 00:20:56,440 --> 00:20:57,440 No, I'm not. 321 00:20:59,440 --> 00:21:00,440 Well, yes, I am. 322 00:21:02,240 --> 00:21:04,900 What do you do if you love someone, but you're afraid they won't love you back? 323 00:21:05,700 --> 00:21:11,280 Fear of rejection is a tough thing. But if you really love that person, you have 324 00:21:11,280 --> 00:21:14,500 to just... never tell them. 325 00:21:15,640 --> 00:21:19,340 What? If you're worried about being rejected, it's probably for a reason. 326 00:21:19,800 --> 00:21:21,640 Trust me, I've been through this. 327 00:21:22,940 --> 00:21:23,940 Maybe you're right, Piper. 328 00:21:25,000 --> 00:21:29,660 I can't risk losing... that person as a friend. 329 00:21:31,160 --> 00:21:32,360 She means too much to me. 330 00:21:35,100 --> 00:21:36,340 Then this is for the best. 331 00:21:41,760 --> 00:21:42,760 Phew. 332 00:21:42,900 --> 00:21:44,480 I almost told Piper I'm in love with her. 333 00:21:44,940 --> 00:21:46,320 That would have ruined everything. 334 00:21:47,080 --> 00:21:49,700 Phew. He almost told Janine that he was in love with her. 335 00:21:49,960 --> 00:21:51,240 That would have ruined everything. 336 00:21:59,680 --> 00:22:01,060 Bowie Sherman had it all. 337 00:22:01,360 --> 00:22:06,600 A hit song, fabulous wealth, which he framed instead of cashing, and a 338 00:22:06,600 --> 00:22:08,020 beautiful half-girlfriend. 339 00:22:08,260 --> 00:22:13,020 But the only thing faster than Bowie's rise to fame was his fall from grace. 340 00:22:14,260 --> 00:22:16,540 I don't know why Bowie thought he could write a second hit song. 341 00:22:16,760 --> 00:22:17,760 He didn't write the first one. 342 00:22:19,970 --> 00:22:22,450 You're the fishiest girl I ever seen. 343 00:22:24,230 --> 00:22:26,890 Straight from the waters of the marine. 344 00:22:27,110 --> 00:22:29,710 Reverse Mermaid was a commercial and critical disaster. 345 00:22:30,050 --> 00:22:31,050 He lost everything. 346 00:22:31,430 --> 00:22:34,190 Even the people who'd been there from the beginning wouldn't talk to him. 347 00:22:36,270 --> 00:22:37,870 Creative differences. 348 00:22:38,230 --> 00:22:39,810 The Bowie Sherman story. 349 00:22:40,350 --> 00:22:45,350 Monday at 630. I'm P. Everett Knickknack. The P stands for pathetic. 350 00:22:45,730 --> 00:22:46,850 Just pathetic. 351 00:22:47,570 --> 00:22:49,890 The way that you rock, the way that you talk. 352 00:22:50,130 --> 00:22:51,390 You got me singing. 353 00:22:53,730 --> 00:22:56,150 You're the prettiest girl that I've ever seen. 354 00:22:57,950 --> 00:23:00,190 Straight from the cover of a magazine. 355 00:23:00,550 --> 00:23:03,890 So what's it gonna take ya? What I gotta do? Tell me how to make ya. 356 00:23:06,790 --> 00:23:09,030 My beauty queen. 357 00:23:11,020 --> 00:23:12,100 My beauty queen 25774

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