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1
00:00:15,950 --> 00:00:18,185
Dear Lord...
2
00:00:18,386 --> 00:00:23,324
...I know we haven't talked to you
since the 4th of July blowout sale...
3
00:00:24,525 --> 00:00:28,429
...but with three more shopping days
until Christmas...
4
00:00:28,829 --> 00:00:31,198
...we ask you to protect us...
5
00:00:31,365 --> 00:00:35,836
...as we stare into the valley
of the shadow of thighs.
6
00:00:39,306 --> 00:00:41,275
-Amen.
-Amen.
7
00:00:45,946 --> 00:00:48,949
Can let go of my hand now, Griff.
8
00:00:49,250 --> 00:00:50,951
Do I have to?
9
00:00:52,153 --> 00:00:53,487
Sorry.
10
00:00:53,654 --> 00:00:55,289
All right.
11
00:00:56,290 --> 00:00:58,959
Let's unlock and load.
12
00:01:02,730 --> 00:01:06,767
Help me. Easy. Easy. Easy.
13
00:01:08,736 --> 00:01:12,206
Don't take it. No--
14
00:01:58,352 --> 00:02:01,489
I love Christmas.
Keep them coming, kids.
15
00:02:01,655 --> 00:02:03,691
Oh, could you pass down
some butter?
16
00:02:03,858 --> 00:02:05,593
-Mom.
-You're not supposed to eat it.
17
00:02:06,861 --> 00:02:08,562
Oh, honey.
18
00:02:13,100 --> 00:02:15,436
-How was work?
-Oh, swell, Peg.
19
00:02:15,603 --> 00:02:17,838
You wanna give me
a little hand here?
20
00:02:23,978 --> 00:02:26,647
Say, looks like my size.
21
00:02:26,814 --> 00:02:28,649
Where's the other one?
22
00:02:28,883 --> 00:02:30,851
You don't want to know.
23
00:02:32,386 --> 00:02:34,455
God, I hate Christmas.
24
00:02:34,622 --> 00:02:38,259
Then I guess this wouldn't be
the best time to ask about a tree.
25
00:02:38,425 --> 00:02:41,495
Now, why would I want something
that just sits in the living room...
26
00:02:41,662 --> 00:02:44,331
...and takes up electricity?
I have you for that.
27
00:02:44,498 --> 00:02:46,834
Come on, Daddy.
We want a Christmas tree.
28
00:02:47,001 --> 00:02:49,503
Yeah. Yeah, and I'm not letting you
hang ornaments...
29
00:02:49,670 --> 00:02:51,438
...on me again this year either.
30
00:02:52,339 --> 00:02:55,042
Do Bundy traditions mean nothing
to you people?
31
00:02:55,342 --> 00:02:57,344
So you got a little rash
from the tinsel.
32
00:02:57,511 --> 00:02:59,513
You were beautiful, son.
33
00:03:06,320 --> 00:03:08,088
Oh, no.
34
00:03:11,959 --> 00:03:14,628
Merry Christmas, all.
I just made some Christmas cookies.
35
00:03:14,795 --> 00:03:17,364
Hey, now, give me those.
36
00:03:22,503 --> 00:03:24,605
You ate my sleeve.
37
00:03:30,711 --> 00:03:32,079
Button.
38
00:03:34,515 --> 00:03:37,084
Well, I just came by to tell you...
39
00:03:37,384 --> 00:03:39,853
...that this year,
I am finally going to win...
40
00:03:40,020 --> 00:03:42,323
...the neighborhood
decorating contest.
41
00:03:42,489 --> 00:03:45,693
What, are you gonna stand out front
and be the Little Drummer Boy?
42
00:03:48,963 --> 00:03:52,433
No, Stench Who Stole Christmas.
43
00:03:53,067 --> 00:03:56,770
I have imported a hand-carved
nativity scene from Bavaria.
44
00:03:56,937 --> 00:03:58,872
Cost me 5 grand.
45
00:03:59,039 --> 00:04:02,142
Don't you think that money would be
better spent on a needy family?
46
00:04:02,443 --> 00:04:04,011
You know, like us?
47
00:04:05,079 --> 00:04:07,815
Just 25 cents a day would make
a world of difference...
48
00:04:07,982 --> 00:04:10,484
...in this little boy's life.
49
00:04:11,352 --> 00:04:16,523
Forget it. My holy family is going to
kick every Yuletide ass on the block.
50
00:04:18,425 --> 00:04:20,728
Now, that's some Christmas spirit.
51
00:04:20,894 --> 00:04:23,831
You know, maybe we ought to have
some traditions around here.
52
00:04:23,998 --> 00:04:27,534
-What, Peg, like Christmas dinner?
-Oh, no.
53
00:04:27,701 --> 00:04:30,070
That's been done to death.
54
00:04:30,638 --> 00:04:33,874
You know, I saw a gingerbread house
on Oprah today.
55
00:04:34,041 --> 00:04:36,377
Maybe I ought to make one of those.
56
00:04:36,543 --> 00:04:39,179
Does she know
that would require baking?
57
00:04:39,713 --> 00:04:41,949
Not to mention standing up.
58
00:04:42,116 --> 00:04:43,984
I'll show you guys.
59
00:04:44,151 --> 00:04:48,689
I'm going in this kitchen right now
and I'm gonna start baking.
60
00:04:49,990 --> 00:04:54,628
All right. Now, just tell me which one
of these things is the oven?
61
00:04:55,896 --> 00:04:57,965
Tough day, huh, Griff?
62
00:05:01,268 --> 00:05:04,905
-Griff?
-Well, it's a shame the toes don't fit.
63
00:05:06,940 --> 00:05:10,444
Merry Christmas, jingle boobs.
64
00:05:10,778 --> 00:05:12,379
To stop your whining...
65
00:05:12,546 --> 00:05:14,181
...I've got you some holiday help.
66
00:05:14,481 --> 00:05:18,986
Boys. Al, Griff, meet Hal, Biff.
67
00:05:22,122 --> 00:05:24,525
Do they remind you of anyone?
68
00:05:25,726 --> 00:05:28,195
Hootie and One Blowfish?
69
00:05:31,865 --> 00:05:35,035
Okay, teach them
everything you know.
70
00:05:35,202 --> 00:05:38,972
And when those five minutes are up,
get this place straightened up.
71
00:05:40,441 --> 00:05:42,076
Let's huddle.
72
00:05:44,044 --> 00:05:47,181
Hey, I said huddle, not cuddle.
73
00:05:49,083 --> 00:05:53,020
I'm sorry.
Holidays are a lonely time for me.
74
00:05:53,187 --> 00:05:57,725
All right. Listen, we've got two young,
eager boys hanging around us.
75
00:05:57,891 --> 00:06:01,028
-You know what that makes us?
-Michael Jackson?
76
00:06:08,502 --> 00:06:11,905
No! Management.
77
00:06:12,072 --> 00:06:13,807
And you know
what management does?
78
00:06:13,974 --> 00:06:15,909
Takes long lunches
and leaves early?
79
00:06:16,076 --> 00:06:17,911
Exactly.
80
00:06:18,078 --> 00:06:20,080
We've trained our whole lives
for this.
81
00:06:23,884 --> 00:06:27,521
-Smells good in here.
-Oh, a gingerbread house.
82
00:06:27,688 --> 00:06:29,790
Oh, no, no. That's not for eating.
83
00:06:29,957 --> 00:06:32,826
This is what you call decorative.
84
00:06:34,962 --> 00:06:36,130
Oh, that's great.
85
00:06:36,296 --> 00:06:39,500
The first time you cook something,
and you won't let us eat it.
86
00:06:39,666 --> 00:06:42,035
Hey, Mom, there's a big crack in it.
87
00:06:42,202 --> 00:06:45,572
Well, yeah. That's because
it's our house.
88
00:06:46,039 --> 00:06:47,808
You see that cotton candy?
89
00:06:47,975 --> 00:06:50,177
That's asbestos.
90
00:06:50,911 --> 00:06:53,213
Hey, that's cool. Can I help?
91
00:06:53,514 --> 00:06:56,984
Well, sure. Why don't you separate
these eggs.
92
00:07:07,127 --> 00:07:10,230
Peggy, oh, my God.
Something horrible has happened.
93
00:07:10,564 --> 00:07:13,267
Mary and Joseph
have been kidnapped...
94
00:07:13,567 --> 00:07:15,736
...from our nativity scene.
95
00:07:16,637 --> 00:07:18,071
Have you guys seen anything?
96
00:07:18,238 --> 00:07:20,774
-No, nothing.
-No, I haven't seen anything.
97
00:07:20,941 --> 00:07:24,845
Well, they pinned this note
on the donkey.
98
00:07:26,847 --> 00:07:31,285
Pay us $500,
or it's drapes for the holy family.
99
00:07:31,952 --> 00:07:33,921
It's curtains.
100
00:07:36,123 --> 00:07:38,625
That's what they meant. Curtains.
101
00:07:44,932 --> 00:07:47,935
Well, it sounds like
they mean business.
102
00:07:48,101 --> 00:07:51,572
-Are you gonna pay?
-Well, of course we're gonna pay.
103
00:07:51,738 --> 00:07:55,342
-But first we're gonna call the cops.
-No. No cops!
104
00:07:57,611 --> 00:07:59,079
I mean, you don't wanna risk it.
105
00:07:59,246 --> 00:08:01,682
Kidnappers don't like it
when you call the cops.
106
00:08:01,849 --> 00:08:04,685
I'm sure they forgot to put that
in the note.
107
00:08:07,120 --> 00:08:08,121
Bud, Kelly.
108
00:08:08,288 --> 00:08:10,958
-Yeah?
-What?
109
00:08:11,124 --> 00:08:13,694
Will you help us put these up
around the neighborhood?
110
00:08:18,298 --> 00:08:20,601
Here are your burgers, sir.
111
00:08:21,201 --> 00:08:22,769
They're still warm.
112
00:08:22,936 --> 00:08:24,738
-Well done.
-Thank you, sir.
113
00:08:24,905 --> 00:08:27,674
I said I wanted them well done.
114
00:08:28,909 --> 00:08:31,378
Damn public school system.
115
00:08:31,678 --> 00:08:34,381
You see, this is exactly why
I don't pay taxes.
116
00:08:37,417 --> 00:08:40,354
So, Bundy,
how are your protégés doing?
117
00:08:40,654 --> 00:08:42,990
Well, they're still slightly inflamed...
118
00:08:43,156 --> 00:08:45,993
...but the new employees
are doing well.
119
00:08:48,962 --> 00:08:52,366
Good. You two are fired.
120
00:08:52,666 --> 00:08:55,269
What? What did we do?
121
00:08:55,435 --> 00:08:58,171
It's what you didn't do.
Will you look at this?
122
00:08:58,338 --> 00:09:01,208
These two kids have done more work
in the last three days...
123
00:09:01,375 --> 00:09:03,810
...than you've done in 25 years.
124
00:09:04,745 --> 00:09:07,381
Well, I pace myself.
125
00:09:08,181 --> 00:09:10,217
-Hal, Biff, you're in charge now.
-Oh, okay.
126
00:09:10,384 --> 00:09:12,953
Fine. You want us out of here?
Fine. Let's go, Griff.
127
00:09:13,120 --> 00:09:16,256
There's gotta be other jobs out there
that pay a lot more than this.
128
00:09:32,439 --> 00:09:35,309
Okay, now, remember,
we don't want them to recognize you.
129
00:09:35,475 --> 00:09:39,212
What, do you think I'm an idiot,
Bud? God.
130
00:09:48,488 --> 00:09:50,057
Hello?
131
00:09:50,490 --> 00:09:54,962
If you ever want to see
Mary and Joseph alive again...
132
00:09:55,829 --> 00:09:57,898
...drop $500...
133
00:09:59,299 --> 00:10:01,969
...outside the ooz at 9:00.
134
00:10:03,270 --> 00:10:06,039
That's the zoo at 6:00, you moron.
135
00:10:06,206 --> 00:10:10,310
That's the zoo at 6:00, you moron.
136
00:10:11,345 --> 00:10:15,282
Okay. We'll do it, but how do we know
you haven't hurt them?
137
00:10:15,449 --> 00:10:17,351
Tell them to put the statues
on the phone.
138
00:10:17,517 --> 00:10:21,021
Good idea. Put the statues on the--
You idiot.
139
00:10:23,256 --> 00:10:25,192
-We're rich, Bud. We're rich!
-What?
140
00:10:25,359 --> 00:10:28,595
This is gonna be
the best Christmas ever.
141
00:10:29,029 --> 00:10:32,332
Oh, I knew you kids
would get the Christmas spirit.
142
00:10:32,499 --> 00:10:35,202
Hi, Mom. I thought you finished
our gingerbread house.
143
00:10:35,369 --> 00:10:36,636
Well, I did.
144
00:10:36,937 --> 00:10:42,209
But I had so much fun that I decided
to bake the whole neighborhood.
145
00:10:48,015 --> 00:10:49,950
That-- This is incredible.
146
00:10:50,117 --> 00:10:52,853
Hey, look. There's old man
Maginty's house.
147
00:10:53,020 --> 00:10:56,590
You even got the telescope he uses
to watch me shower.
148
00:10:58,158 --> 00:10:59,960
Mom, what are those two
marshmallows...
149
00:11:00,127 --> 00:11:01,962
...in your bedroom window?
150
00:11:02,129 --> 00:11:05,298
Oh, well, that's Daddy mooning
the D'Arcys.
151
00:11:18,078 --> 00:11:19,513
Bless you.
152
00:11:21,948 --> 00:11:24,084
You know, I'm tired of looking out
for the cops.
153
00:11:24,251 --> 00:11:26,987
I wanna get down to that mall
employment office. Wanna come?
154
00:11:27,154 --> 00:11:29,156
No, I'm fine.
I've got some money put away.
155
00:11:29,322 --> 00:11:31,491
What kind of job you gonna find
on Christmas Eve?
156
00:11:31,658 --> 00:11:35,695
Whatever kind of job it is, it can't be
any more humiliating than this.
157
00:11:46,706 --> 00:11:49,276
Hey, mister, are you Santa?
158
00:11:50,644 --> 00:11:53,180
Do I look like Santa?
159
00:11:53,346 --> 00:11:55,315
Well, you're fat.
160
00:11:57,084 --> 00:11:59,486
Well, you're walking.
161
00:12:07,060 --> 00:12:09,329
Al, is that you?
162
00:12:09,496 --> 00:12:12,732
Man, you make one ugly hobbit.
163
00:12:13,033 --> 00:12:16,236
I happen to be the elfineer.
164
00:12:17,137 --> 00:12:20,006
-At least I got a job.
-Well, I got a job.
165
00:12:20,173 --> 00:12:21,975
I thought
you had money put away.
166
00:12:22,142 --> 00:12:25,245
Well, I did, but then I got a corn dog
and a kiddie coke...
167
00:12:25,412 --> 00:12:27,280
...and there went my nest egg.
168
00:12:29,049 --> 00:12:30,517
Well, what kind of job you doing?
169
00:12:30,684 --> 00:12:34,488
I got an executive position
in the overnight-delivery business.
170
00:12:34,654 --> 00:12:39,326
Hey, Blitzen, get your tail back over
to the sled.
171
00:12:40,127 --> 00:12:42,295
Hi, I'm Prancer.
172
00:12:47,734 --> 00:12:49,569
No kidding.
173
00:12:50,170 --> 00:12:54,007
Come on, Blitzen.
It's time to get into our harness.
174
00:12:57,444 --> 00:13:02,082
What kind of reindeer games
you playing over there, Griff?
175
00:13:02,716 --> 00:13:07,120
One more crack out of you
and I'll kick your curly-toed butt.
176
00:13:07,287 --> 00:13:10,724
Well, now, Griff, don't be bitter just
because my job's better than yours.
177
00:13:12,692 --> 00:13:14,161
Mister...
178
00:13:14,327 --> 00:13:17,130
...I don't feel so good.
179
00:13:17,297 --> 00:13:21,468
Son, son, I'm an elf, not a doctor.
180
00:13:25,505 --> 00:13:26,973
This is all your fault.
181
00:13:27,140 --> 00:13:30,143
What were you doing sticking
the statues out the car window?
182
00:13:31,311 --> 00:13:34,548
Well, what were you doing
driving through a tunnel?
183
00:13:35,515 --> 00:13:37,417
I don't know what
the big deal is, Bud.
184
00:13:37,584 --> 00:13:39,286
You don't know what the big deal is?
185
00:13:39,452 --> 00:13:42,222
We beheaded Mary and Joseph.
186
00:13:42,689 --> 00:13:45,592
We're going to jail.
We're going to hell.
187
00:13:48,328 --> 00:13:50,830
Now, this is what
we're gonna do, see?
188
00:13:52,499 --> 00:13:55,268
Now, we're sticking
to our story, see?
189
00:13:55,635 --> 00:13:59,039
We don't know nothing
about no holy family, see?
190
00:14:00,140 --> 00:14:02,409
Well, we'll do time.
191
00:14:02,576 --> 00:14:05,745
No one's sending me up the river
on no nativity rap.
192
00:14:06,112 --> 00:14:07,781
See?
193
00:14:08,281 --> 00:14:10,483
Oh, my God.
194
00:14:11,551 --> 00:14:13,253
Now, keep your yapper shut.
195
00:14:15,088 --> 00:14:17,390
We waited for over an hour
in the snow...
196
00:14:17,557 --> 00:14:19,426
...and those creeps didn't show.
197
00:14:19,593 --> 00:14:22,596
It's-- It's just a contest.
You still have Christmas.
198
00:14:22,762 --> 00:14:25,799
To hell with Christmas. I wanna win.
199
00:14:26,433 --> 00:14:27,567
You see this money?
200
00:14:27,734 --> 00:14:30,470
This is the closest those kidnappers
are gonna to get to it.
201
00:14:30,637 --> 00:14:35,242
I'm gonna hunt that scum down
if it takes every last cent she has.
202
00:14:36,509 --> 00:14:39,145
I'm sure they're very, very sorry.
203
00:14:39,312 --> 00:14:41,147
No.
204
00:14:42,682 --> 00:14:45,218
They'll be sorry, all right.
205
00:14:45,385 --> 00:14:50,423
Because when we find them,
I'll tear out their fingernails.
206
00:14:51,124 --> 00:14:53,627
Rip their guts out.
207
00:14:54,294 --> 00:14:56,796
And skin them alive.
208
00:14:58,131 --> 00:15:00,433
We did it.
209
00:15:01,401 --> 00:15:03,069
It was us.
210
00:15:03,236 --> 00:15:05,171
It was her!
211
00:15:05,538 --> 00:15:08,475
You're not pinning this one
on me, rat boy.
212
00:15:09,509 --> 00:15:12,512
You stole our statues?
213
00:15:12,679 --> 00:15:15,615
Hey, now, now, now,
calm down, sister.
214
00:15:15,782 --> 00:15:19,419
-We still got your lousy statues.
-Good.
215
00:15:19,586 --> 00:15:23,123
Because if so much as one hair
is missing from their heads--
216
00:15:23,890 --> 00:15:26,593
They don't have any heads.
217
00:15:28,461 --> 00:15:30,930
I can't believe these don't come
in a lower heel.
218
00:15:31,231 --> 00:15:34,467
Oh, they will. Just stand up on them.
219
00:15:45,312 --> 00:15:50,483
Hey, look. It's Santa's village idiot.
What are you doing here?
220
00:15:50,750 --> 00:15:53,953
I have to use the bathroom, punk.
221
00:15:54,254 --> 00:15:57,590
Don't they have one on the train?
222
00:15:58,391 --> 00:16:00,760
Oh, sure. You guys think you're funny,
don't you?
223
00:16:00,927 --> 00:16:03,897
Well, let me tell you something.
You're looking at your futures.
224
00:16:04,197 --> 00:16:06,333
I don't think so, elf boy.
225
00:16:06,499 --> 00:16:09,369
-This is just a--
-Temporary job.
226
00:16:09,536 --> 00:16:13,540
-Yeah, because we're gonna go to--
-College.
227
00:16:13,740 --> 00:16:16,876
You got a girlfriend?
I'll bet it's a redhead.
228
00:16:17,177 --> 00:16:19,279
How did you know that?
229
00:16:20,180 --> 00:16:21,948
Lucky guess.
230
00:16:22,248 --> 00:16:24,718
Congratulations, boys,
you've peaked.
231
00:16:24,884 --> 00:16:29,622
You're gonna slave away here
day in, day out, year in, year out.
232
00:16:29,789 --> 00:16:32,692
Until one day you'll be close to 50...
233
00:16:32,859 --> 00:16:36,730
...and you'll be an elf
driving a choo-choo.
234
00:16:43,737 --> 00:16:45,472
Oh, my God. What if he's right?
235
00:16:45,638 --> 00:16:47,974
-We gotta get out of here.
-Come on.
236
00:16:48,541 --> 00:16:49,743
What?
237
00:16:49,909 --> 00:16:50,944
-We quit, lady.
-We quit, lady.
238
00:16:51,244 --> 00:16:53,313
What? Wait!
239
00:16:53,480 --> 00:16:55,882
Ladies, please, please.
240
00:16:56,416 --> 00:16:58,952
-Bundy, I gotta talk to you.
-What? You want to rub it in?
241
00:16:59,252 --> 00:17:02,555
Well, that's fine, because firing me
was the best thing you could've done.
242
00:17:02,722 --> 00:17:07,894
Because I have a better job now, with
more responsibility and a big hat too.
243
00:17:08,495 --> 00:17:10,864
So you can take your shoe-store job
and shove it...
244
00:17:11,030 --> 00:17:14,234
...because I have something
that's even more important:
245
00:17:14,401 --> 00:17:16,903
My self-respect.
246
00:17:21,641 --> 00:17:24,811
-You can have your job back.
-Thank you.
247
00:17:26,646 --> 00:17:29,949
Excuse me.
We've all been waiting forever.
248
00:17:30,250 --> 00:17:34,454
-But first, a few demands.
-Anything. Just get back to work.
249
00:17:34,621 --> 00:17:36,856
All right. I want you to give
Griff his job back.
250
00:17:37,023 --> 00:17:39,759
Although he's a proud man,
he may not take it.
251
00:17:39,926 --> 00:17:42,262
I'll take it.
252
00:17:51,638 --> 00:17:54,974
-What else, more money?
-Hey, I'm making the demands here.
253
00:17:55,975 --> 00:17:58,011
I also want...
254
00:17:58,344 --> 00:17:59,913
...more money.
255
00:18:00,547 --> 00:18:02,782
And that tree.
256
00:18:04,751 --> 00:18:06,019
No more money.
257
00:18:06,319 --> 00:18:08,254
You can have the tree
after Christmas.
258
00:18:08,421 --> 00:18:09,889
No, no!
259
00:18:10,056 --> 00:18:12,392
Before Christmas.
260
00:18:12,559 --> 00:18:15,395
I'm going to put my foot down.
261
00:18:18,798 --> 00:18:22,602
You drive a hard bargain for a Smurf.
262
00:18:23,403 --> 00:18:25,505
He's an elf.
263
00:18:25,672 --> 00:18:28,508
That's ex-elf.
264
00:18:33,880 --> 00:18:35,915
Damn, it's cold.
265
00:18:41,054 --> 00:18:44,390
I'm freezing my frankincense off.
266
00:18:44,557 --> 00:18:47,494
This is all your fault, "mistletoad."
267
00:18:47,660 --> 00:18:51,364
-Mom, please make her let us go.
-No.
268
00:18:51,531 --> 00:18:53,433
What you did was wrong.
269
00:18:53,600 --> 00:18:58,037
You had no intention of sharing
that ransom money with me.
270
00:18:59,138 --> 00:19:02,475
-Here come the judges.
-Merry Christmas, D'Arcys.
271
00:19:02,642 --> 00:19:05,778
I see you've outspent yourselves
as usual.
272
00:19:05,945 --> 00:19:08,915
It is a beautiful display, though.
273
00:19:09,082 --> 00:19:11,551
So lifelike.
274
00:19:12,519 --> 00:19:17,724
Yes, but Mary looks a bit trampy.
275
00:19:19,926 --> 00:19:23,696
Well, I hate to say it,
but I think we may have a winner.
276
00:19:23,863 --> 00:19:26,466
Yes, I won. I won!
277
00:19:26,633 --> 00:19:29,903
Oh, I bought the spirit of Christmas.
278
00:19:30,103 --> 00:19:32,705
I think she means she brought
the spirit of Christmas.
279
00:19:32,872 --> 00:19:35,008
Oh, yes, to you lovely people.
280
00:19:35,174 --> 00:19:36,709
Wait a minute.
281
00:19:36,876 --> 00:19:39,479
Look at the Bundys' window.
282
00:19:39,646 --> 00:19:42,148
Is that our neighborhood?
283
00:19:42,448 --> 00:19:45,852
I made it myself out of gingerbread.
284
00:19:46,019 --> 00:19:50,757
Look, Marge, isn't that your father
with his telescope?
285
00:19:53,826 --> 00:19:57,463
Congratulations, Mrs. Bundy.
Here's your trophy.
286
00:19:57,630 --> 00:20:00,633
And a hundred dollars.
287
00:20:04,504 --> 00:20:05,872
Well, thanks.
288
00:20:06,039 --> 00:20:11,411
You know, I haven't won anything
since I was Miss Teenage Wanker.
289
00:20:12,679 --> 00:20:16,983
And you get second prize,
a fruitcake.
290
00:20:20,219 --> 00:20:23,056
Shove the fruitcake, you bitch.
291
00:20:26,426 --> 00:20:28,428
We'll take it.
292
00:20:29,729 --> 00:20:32,699
Yeah, we love fruitcake.
293
00:20:44,644 --> 00:20:46,446
This special report just in.
294
00:20:46,613 --> 00:20:49,148
Hundreds of people are flocking
to the Dan Ryan tunnel...
295
00:20:49,449 --> 00:20:50,783
...to see a Christmas miracle.
296
00:20:50,950 --> 00:20:54,020
Witnesses are saying that the heads
of Joseph and the Virgin Mary...
297
00:20:54,187 --> 00:20:57,490
...appear to be embedded
in the tunnel wall.
298
00:21:01,694 --> 00:21:04,230
Merry Christmas.
299
00:21:07,166 --> 00:21:10,870
Oh, Al, you got a tree.
300
00:21:11,037 --> 00:21:14,040
Oh, Daddy, and before Christmas.
301
00:21:14,207 --> 00:21:17,010
-Oh, honey, how was your day?
-Oh, same old thing, Peg.
302
00:21:17,176 --> 00:21:20,747
Started out in the shoe store,
you know, ended up in the shoe store.
303
00:21:20,913 --> 00:21:22,915
You know, this is the best
Christmas ever.
304
00:21:23,082 --> 00:21:27,286
We got a tree and I won
the neighborhood decorating contest.
305
00:21:27,587 --> 00:21:30,590
And I-- I still have nine toes.
306
00:21:30,757 --> 00:21:32,258
Eight.
307
00:21:33,559 --> 00:21:35,962
Merry Christmas.
23401
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