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Who are they?

It's the D.

Sorry.

♪

You'll give yourself indigestion.

I don't want to be late.

No one turns up to rehearsals on time.

The costumes arrived yesterday.

They are so beautiful.

I don't know where Harold finds the money.

Well, the economy is booming, no doubt

Harold's exports and imports are booming too.

And there are dark rumors of a change of venue.

Apparently, the corn exchange is no longer good enough for him.

Was it ever.

You haven't finished your supper, Harold.

Dinner, woman, dinner.

How many times do you have to be told?

I'm sorry, Harold. I'm sorry.

Did you get all the Amadeus publicity out?

Oh, yes, Harold, yes.

That is, I haven't done the Ferndale Center.

It's just a long way, and there's no direct bus route.

I was wondering, would you mind taking?

When you see Peter Hall running around sticking up posters, let me know.

I should be happy to join him.

♪

♪

Hello, Deirdre.

I'm running late.

I couldn't settle Daddy for ages.

Oh.

Bad again, is he?

You could say that.

What can I do?

Shall I...

Shall I set up for you?

Oh, thank you, David.

I need that little pie-crust table with the cakes on and Salieri's wing chair.

Right.

Does that look Viennese, that?

Very blue Danube.

Every time I get roped into this, I tell myself it'll be the last time.

Don't we all.

Carly coming down with this one, is she?

Oh, yes.

Never misses if her mother's in it.

She, um, she brought any boys home yet?

Who, Joyce?

Yeah, one or two.

I wish David would.

He's not getting any younger.

I'd love to see him, if not settled, at least going out with someone.

Well, he will.

Just hasn't met her yet.

Yeah.

Three copies of Notes from a Small Island.

Two.

I knew that girl with the Mickey Mouse rucksack was up to no good.

A passionata, two.

Four.

Now they're bringing them back.

You just don't mark the stuff off.

Well, I still think we should have done this on Sunday.

Ah, but then Harold wouldn't be running round

incandescent with rage because he missed rehearsal.

There's no fun if you can't see it.

Nicholas can act it out when he gets back.

He'll enjoy that.

I believe he's got a secret passion now, Nicko.

But it's not for dusting.

I think he's having an affair.

Hello, Rosa.

Ah, Nicole.

Costumes, come.

Shall I hear your lines?

No, I'm all right, I think.

-Careful. -There's doors here.

Green room.

Oh, let's have a look.

Nico, don't start pulling them about.

Wow, is this one mine?

No, it's the Emperor Joseph's.

Careful, mind that wig.

I'd give anything to play with Cusio.

You should get Amadeus out of your system first.

Salieri, kapelmeister, tutor, patron saint

of mediocrities, murderer.

Don't be silly.

He killed Mozart.

It never proved.

A life for a life.

It's only a play.

♪

♪

Where is everyone?

Deidre?

Don't mind, Deidre.

Yes, Harold.

Where are my actors?

Well, I'm not, um...

Oh, Rosa... I know where Rosa is, you stupid girl.

What about lighting and design?

Oh, yes.

Tim and Avery are stock-taking, but they'll be here on Thursday.

I need them here now.

Today.

Not Thursday.

You should have told them.

It's not Deidre's fault.

Anyway, I...

I need her to help me with the interval tape.

All right.

Where is my star?

Here I am, Maestro.

I'm not in a humorous vein today, Nicholas.

Where is Esslyn?

God, what am I doing here?

Casting pearls before uncultured swine.

I, who directed a number one tour of Spider's Web with the

original West End cast, so renowned that one critic said he'd

never seen anything like it in the whole of his theatrical life.

How often Johnny G.

would turn to me for advice.

Harold Love, he would say, Dear boy, this speech of Prospero's...

Where the hell have you been?

You do realize that the first night is barely a week away?

Better get on with it then, hadn't we?

Hmm

♪

♪

♪

I'll go to England.

England loves music.

That's the answer.

We were yet again in the library

of the Baroness Val- Valstaten.

I know, I know.

Valstaten.

That room fated to be the scene of ghastly encounters between us.

Again to the compensating crema al mascarpone.

I was there when I was a boy.

They absolutely adored me.

I had more kisses than you've had cakes.

When I was young, everyone loved me.

He's doing it again.

Masking me at every turn.

-No, I'm not. -Yes, you are.

Horrid Nicholas.

I'll say whether he is or not, thank you.

Salieri is the lead in this play.

It is me the people come to see over and over again.

Only because they couldn't believe their eyes the first time.

-How dare you? -Oh, don't be so pompous.

Everyone knows you're only an accountant.

And everyone knows your chances of ever getting into the professional theater.

Kitty, could you just try this on?

Sorry.

Sorry.

I think Eslyn should be playing Leopold Mozart.

He's described as a jealous, dried-up old turd.

Leopold Mozart is not in the play.

Are you sure?

What?

Page 49.

Well, I can't see it.

Only in spirit.

You mustn't allow Esslyn to do as he likes.

He'll unbalance the whole play.

You must be firm with him.

You were firm with Sir John.

He was a joy to direct, a true professional.

Then he acknowledged my talent.

Takes one to know one, Harold.

Another few weeks and I won't be needing padding at all.

Ow!

Rosa? Darling, have you pricked your finger?

Maybe she'll go to sleep for a hundred years.

Give us all a break.

Rosa, leave me alone.

Would you like a plaster for that?

No!

20 years, we were married, and he'd never give me a child.

It was never the right time, you see.

We were too young.

We didn't have enough money.

The business wasn't established.

But then, when the business was thriving, he'd give me all that

moralistic claptrap about it being no sort of world to bring a child into.

And then to get Kitty pregnant!

Sometimes I don't know which of them I hate the most.

-Evening, sir. -That's right.

What do you got?

Middle-aged woman.

Doc Bullard reckoned she's been in the water some time.

-George. -Doc. -Straightforward, is it?

Hard to say at this stage.

Terrible bang on the side of the head.

Could have happened while she was in the water.

Do you know her, sir?

No.

I don't know who she is.

♪

Couldn't this have waited till the morning?

Cannot start a post-mortem without identification, sir.

♪

Yes, that's my cousin.

Agnes Grey.

I knew he had a case as soon as I saw that terrific crack on her head.

Oh, yeah?

No water in the lungs.

Debriny threw her in.

Stands to reason.

Sometimes I wonder why we bother going through all the usual procedures.

We could just come straight to you.

Tire lever, didn't they reckon on the report?

Yeah, or a crowbar.

I suppose you could almost say he done the poor woman a kindness.

Pardon?

She was suffering from cancer quite advanced and apparently never treated.

I didn't see that.

Nobody's perfect.

♪

This is Agnes' place here, sir.

♪

No, no, no.

Excuse me.

We are Causton CID.

Oh.

And you are?

Jenny Evers.

Something wrong?

I'm afraid Miss Gray has had an accident.

Oh.

Do you know her well?

Not very.

We chat about holidays sometimes.

She's always going away.

She went to Austria in the spring.

Actually, I thought she'd gone off again when I saw the car had disappeared.

And when was that?

About a week ago.

How come you know of Agnes Grey?

She used to come to the plays Joyce's drama group put on.

Eslyn belongs to the same group.

He's a cold devil.

He looked down at her as if she was a lump of meat.

Eslyn is not known for his affectionate nature.

Lunch?

Can't.

I'm supposed to be buying a book for my mum's birthday.

Well, hello.

Afternoon.

How can I help?

I'm looking for a book.

Books are what we do best.

For my mother.

Something light?

I've got a lovely new trollop.

Pardon?

Oh, Catherine Cookson.

She goes down well in the home counties.

Is that a fact?

I think it's the contrast to all these dark, satanic mills.

Actually, she's more into this heritage Edwardian lady stuff.

She's already got the tea towels, the chopping board, the oven mitt.

We're running out of ideas.

So you thought you'd get the diary.

Oh, I designed the set for that.

My partner did the lighting.

He has a way with a lamp you wouldn't believe.

Avery, I'm in a hurry.

Now, what do you call this?

The third finger of your right hand.

You are supposed to dust this place thoroughly

every morning in exchange for that room upstairs.

I'm sorry.

-I overslept. -I'll do it tomorrow.

Now, where are you going, anyway?

I'm meeting someone, all right?

If you're in a hurry, mate, I should try Smith's.

It took you long enough.

He only tried to sell me a diary in the middle of October.

In the end, I got her a nice little car vacuum set.

Your mother doesn't have a car.

No, I went to do for cushions and stuff.

Is that the forensic on Agnes Gray?

Yeah, it is.

Leaf mold and pine needles on her clothes.

Nothing under her nails, no skin flakes, no hair, no bits of cloth, no blood.

We know from the PM, no scratches.

She didn't put up much of a fight then.

Is this the key that was around her neck?

Yeah.

to a very large catalog.

♪

♪

Oh, your appointment, Mr. Carmichael.

Detective Chief Inspector Barnaby.

Right.

Would you like to come through?

What is it now, Tom?

Thank you.

Agnes Gray.

Is her body released for burial?

You could have told me that over the phone.

Your cousin was murdered, Eslyn.

Agnes?

Well, who would?

I mean, she's just not the sort.

Tell me about her.

Well, there's not much to tell.

She did the same job for 25 years, took early retirement.

What job was this, sir?

With the BBC World Service.

She spoke excellent French and Italian, although

her degree was in art history.

She always sent holiday postcards from the Uffizi,

or the Louvre, or some other dry as dust mausoleum.

What about men?

Was she ever engaged or married?

No.

Poor Agnes, plain little soul.

Friends, then?

She preferred animals, even as a child.

Drove her parents mad.

She was a kind person, then, was she?

Yeah.

Agnes always identified with the weak and

wounded, quite a morbid degree.

But I suppose she was rather a loser herself.

Blimey! Fancy having that as your only living relative.

No wonder she preferred to save the whales.

♪

♪

♪

What are we looking for, sir?

I don't know, Troy, but I'm missing something.

I'll check out the bedroom.

♪

♪

♪

♪

The bastard even ripped her clothes.

Well, he certainly meant a town on this place, didn't he?

No handbag.

I assume he took that when he killed her.

Probably.

A little bit of jewelry.

Pearl brooch, little gold ring, one of those crosses on a bead necklace.

Rosary.

I don't get this place.

What do you mean?

Agnes Grey really appreciated beautiful things.

Yet there's nothing here but a few books to reflect that.

Dreary furniture, dull clothes.

Perhaps she thought she didn't deserve beautiful things.

Doesn't sound as if she had much confidence.

Anything interesting?

Not really.

Many bills.

A letter with a donkey on.

Oh, good.

Dear Miss Gray, thank you from the bottom of our hearts for another

wonderful contribution towards the five-acre meadow and new stabling block.

The 150th.

150,000 pounds.

Let me see that.

Right. I want every bit of paper in this place bagged.

And find out the name of a bank while you're at it.

Oh, God!

First, may I offer my condolences on your sad loss.

Thank you, Mr. Matepiece.

I'm not sure if Miss Gray made you privy to the dispensation of her will.

Well, as I only have two legs and no tail, I don't expect a benefit.

Quite.

It's quite straightforward.

All monies at the time of her death and the

proceeds from the sale of her house go to various charities.

They're carefully listed in some detail.

I don't think you'll find your duties as executor too onerous.

Good.

There is one more thing.

♪

♪

♪

You can have the afternoon off, Mrs. Maddox.

But I've got all these...

-Oh. -Oh.

♪

♪

♪

♪

Kitty, I'm going to have to work late, so

you'd better go to rehearsals without me.

No, no, I won't overdo things.

I'm really very strong.

Ha ha ha ha...

Oh no...

Who's a sick?

Love you.

Love you too, baby.

♪

♪

Beep, beep, beep,

♪

♪

♪

Unbelievable!

Sixty what was it?

Eight hundred and sixty thousand pounds over seven years.

Maybe she won the lottery.

Not in 1991 she didn't.

And then to give it all to animals.

Everyone needs something to love Troy and at least animals love you back.

Not the same though is it?

I wouldn't fancy cuddling up at night to a cocker spaniel.

Oh don't you knock it before you try it.

And so far, over 700 people have signed the petition

protesting against the reduction in library opening hours.

Causton CID, who are investigating the murder of Agnes Grey

from the Midsomer area, would like to talk to anyone who knew her.

They are also anxious to trace her car, a Ford van, registration number

B920B00.

I don't want money.

You know what I want.

Not such an ugly word as murder.

Oh, yes, I have proof, all right.

Monday night.

I'll give you till Monday.

Hello, Dad.

Cully, Cully.

-Hello. -Cully, it's so good to see you.

I thought you were coming home tomorrow.

I caught a late train.

You must be starving.

Oh no, don't fuss.

Sit down and talk to me.

-Kitty! -Up here, darling!

In the box!

Hello?

Rosa, what the hell do you want?

♪

♪

Bum, bum, bum, la

♪

la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la

la la la la la la la la la la la la la la

Madame Marie, N'arabie

dame dit

♪

♪

jamais connu de loi Si

♪

je t'aime

♪

prends garde à toi.

I think it's only fair to tell you.

Fair?

You call this fair?

As soon as tonight's out of the way, I shall start divorce proceedings.

The child will be provided for.

You can provide for yourself.

Judging by the alacrity with which you jumped

into my bed, you shouldn't find that difficult.

Miss Lynn, baby, this is just a stupid misunderstanding.

I love you.

10 hours to go.

I wish first nights didn't make me so nervous.

Oh, at least you can't forget your lines.

I can forget my moves.

Pardon me.

Did she seem genuine, this Peggy Marshall?

I'd say so.

Can bring out a lot of wackos, public appeals.

Miss Marshall?

Yes?

I'm Detective Chief Inspector Barnaby.

This is, um, Detective Sergeant Troy.

I hope you don't mind our meeting here.

No, no. Of course not. It's very good of you to get in touch.

So, uh, how did you know Agnes Gray?

I was assigned to take her under my wing when she first

accepted instruction in the faith, around six months ago.

That would be the, uh, Catholic Church, wouldn't it?

There is only one faith, young man.

I discovered almost at once that Agnes was greatly troubled.

Did you know she had cancer?

Yes.

She had already decided not to have any form of treatment.

I felt a great loneliness in her, Inspector.

She didn't seem to have a single friend.

Did she ever tell you exactly what was troubling her?

No.

Just that she had done something very wrong

and wanted to put matters right before she died.

Did she indicate how?

It wasn't straightforward.

Apparently, another person was involved.

♪

Bitch.

I see you've been got at.

Avery's right.

I have been slacking.

I have things on my mind.

Interesting things?

Secret things.

Well, you shouldn't mention it then.

Teasing people is ill-mannered.

Suffice it to say that any day now, my

life may well be miraculously transformed.

You really are the most irritating boy.

Is that our lunch?

No, it's our lunch.

I just saw Eslyn in the BMW.

Bit early for cheap thrills, isn't it?

Jumped a red light.

♪

♪

So, how do you feel?

Now, you've run like a dream.

You're a brilliant stage manager.

I've got some brilliant help.

Is your...

Is your dad coming?

No.

No, I've persuaded him to wait until the last night.

With a bit of luck, by then he'll have forgotten all about it.

Oh, personal props.

-Oh, I'll... -I'll do those.

Oh, you're very kind, David.

Thank you.

Ah, darling, how lovely to see you.

Completely sold out, as usual.

Sit where you like.

The press seats are reserved.

Ah, good evening, sir.

Sir John is devastated not to be here,

but the journey was just too much for him.

This is going to be the greatest disaster

since my Aunt Letitia fell off the Matterhorn.

Uh-huh.

On the other hand, a bad dress rehearsal does make a good first night.

I wonder what fatuous idiot first thought of that one.

I believe it was Abraham Lincoln.

It's actually filling up.

You'd think they'd know better by now.

So, there she was, snivelling in a prompt corner.

What's the matter, Deidre?

I said.

Apparently, her senile old fool of a father had forgotten to

take his tablets and gone out directing traffic at Badger's Drift.

LAUGHTER How terrible, says I.

Yes, says Deidre.

He doesn't know that area at all.

LAUGHTER

Very funny.

You know your problem, Eslyn?

What might that be, Nicholas?

Too full of the milk of human kindness.

What?

You've quoted from the Scottish play.

What, Macbeth?

You have to go outside the dressing

room, turn round three times and come back in.

That would be ridiculous.

Is that clockwise or anticlockwise?

♪

Daddy!

I just came to wish you good luck.

You're not supposed to be out by yourself.

I just came to wish you good luck.

Oh, thank you very much.

Come on, darling.

Let's go and find you a seat.

Bold effects are, as you know, my forte.

You can never have too much verismo.

What is verismo?

Hello, Doris.

Nice to see you again.

Would you like a present?

If it's wishy-washy naturalism you're

after, we'll stay at home and watch television.

Troy, you've made it, then.

Troy, this is my daughter, Cully.

Cully, Gavin, Troy.

-Hi, Gavin. -Pleased to meet you.

The finest castles in Spider's Web, and the merriest world.

There's a full house out there, and the atmosphere's electric.

Neck and leg break, man.

Good luck, everyone.

Especially you.

Sorry.

You're going to be OK. You're in her bed.

Stayed behind a gloat, have you?

I beg your pardon?

Do you think I don't know who's responsible for this and for doing over my car?

You don't think that breaking us up is going to bring him back, do you?

I'm sure I don't know what you mean.

Want to know how we described your sex life?

I said it was like humping a tranquilised cart horse.

-mi-moooo!

This is it, lover.

No turning back.

No turning back?

mad in your eye.

That's my set.

Shazam! Shazam!

Shazam!

Shazam!

Shazam!

Shazam!

-Shazam! -Shazam! Shazam!

Shazam! Shazam!

-Shazam! Shazam! -Shazam! Shazam!

Shazam! Shazam! Shazam!

Shazam! Shazam! Shazam! Shazam! Shazam! Shazam!

Shazam! Shazam! Shazam! Shazam! Shazam! Shazam! Shazam! Shazam! Shazam Shazam!

I know who started the tale.

I know who started the tale.

The old man's valet.

The old man's cook.

Squeak, squeak, squeak.

Meow.

-Squeak. -Meow, meow, meow.

I'm going to pounce, bounce.

I'm going to scrunch, munch.

I'm going to choo-poo my little mouse, wouse.

I'm going to tear her to bits with my paws, claws.

Paws, claws.

Paws, claws.

♪

♪

♪

♪

♪

♪

♪

These cakes are absolutely vile!

Hello, Mr Tibbs.

How are you enjoying it?

I just came to wish you good luck.

Do you want a cup of coffee?

No, no, no, don't get up.

I'll bring you one down.

I'm not going to see you again.

Oh, so am I.

Thank you, sir.

I can't afford to see you again.

I'm trying to.

I'm not going to see you again.

It's a beautiful picture.

I might have to go. Excuse me one second.

Very good, isn't it?

I reckon they're on a par with that lot in EastEnders.

You're the one playing Mozart, is you?

Yeah.

Oh, it's good, this.

I've never been to the theater before.

This isn't a theater, Gavin.

Well, I must say, our little ensemble's excelling itself tonight.

Half the cast were making us up as they went along, and the

Emperor Joe's is walking as if he's got to duck up his knickers.

But the lighting was, as always, magnificent.

Now, I can offer anchovy and

provolone on olive bread,

or walnut and banana on fruit loaf with brown sugar...

Where are you going?

A spot went on stage.

I've got to fix it.

I didn't notice that.

Keep going, keep going, keep going, keep going.

Yeah.

Trouble?

Flickered a bit, then went out.

I didn't notice that happened.

Don't you start.

You OK, Tim?

I'll be perfectly OK as soon as people stop coming

up to me every five minutes, wanting to know if I'm OK.

OK?

Sorry, I'm a bit edgy.

I'll be glad when tonight's over.

Where's the three-minute buzzer?

It's only just started.

How dare you answer me back?

You're a brainless moronic cretin.

What are you?

Let's go get some food.

Hey, what happened to you?

Oh, walked into an accountant.

It's not my poor love.

Kiss it better.

I have been listening to the cats in the courtyard.

They are all singing Rossini.

Where do we go then?

What?

Do we do it here?

Why not?

Well, let's get on with it.

There are your manuscripts.

Please take them and go.

Now!

At once!

You shit!

-Via! -Don't return!

You run of shit!

Bloody hell, what's going on down there?

If he lays another finger on me, I'll freaking kill him!

Shh!

Bastard!

I dare say he can't do much harm.

Bastard!

To be frank, no one can do much harm musically to the Princess Elizabeth.

Nico, you're on!

Mozart certainly did not suspect me.

The Emperor made his announcement in his usual way.

Well, there it is.

And I commiserated with the loser.

♪

I think we should bring the curtain down.

Not before my death, senior don't.

Harold would only take it up again.

Well, that's true.

We don't know what Eskild will do next.

I'm all right.

Forewarned is forearmed.

Wolfie?

Stansy.

Oh, Wolfie, my love.

Little husband of my heart.

Oh.

Oh, my dear one.

Come with me.

Come on, now.

There, there.

Salieri.

Salieri has killed me.

Yes, my dear.

He has?

He told me so.

Yes.

Yes, I'm sure.

Now, I will go to become a ghost myself.

I will stand in the shadows when you come

here to this earth in your turn.

And when you feel the dreadful bite of your failures and

hear the taunting of an unachievable,

uncaring god, I will

whisper my name to you, Salieri,

patron saint of mediocrities.

Truth will out.

And in the depths of your downcastness,

you can pray for me, and I will forgive you.

Vi saluto!

Yeah

Oh my God.

Get the curtain down.

Get it down!

washed in the blood of the Lamb.

Uh, ladies and gentlemen, grab your attention, please.

There's been an accident.

Would you all please stay in your seats for the next few minutes?

Thank you.

I'm absolutely certain, Tom, the tape was

on the blade when Deirdre checked the razor.

I was here.

And when was that?

A few minutes before cutting up.

So it just sits there until the end of the play?

Yes.

And anyone could have tampered with it.

A bit risky.

People are using the props at the table all the time.

Yeah, but why, Stim?

Actors milling about.

We can't just whip it off.

You'd need a knife.

And even then, you'd have to be careful.

That thing was bloody sharp.

I can't believe it.

Who would do such a dreadful thing?

Everyone liked Teslin.

Well, obviously, not quite everyone, darling.

Perhaps it was an accident.

Well, of course it was an accident.

The tape got torn or something.

It's outrageous keeping us shut in here like naughty children.

Well, that's show business.

Start the evening with Mozart, end up with Goethe-Dimmerung.

How can you be so heartless?

It's all that stupid girl's fault, if she'd checked the thing properly.

Deidre is not stupid.

And I doubt very much whether any of this will prove to be her fault.

Then why has she disappeared?

Her father ran off straight after it happened.

I heard Tom talking to David Smy about it.

David Smy?

She's an assistant stage manager, the lowest of the low.

As director, I should be seen first.

I am in charge here!

The police are in charge here, sir.

Now, if you'll please just...

Excuse me!

How is she?

Not good.

The paramedics gave her some stuff, but it's made her pretty sleepy.

Is there anything I can do?

I don't think so, but thanks all the same.

Cully, I'm sorry.

I should have got these to you before.

Joyce?

Tom.

Look, darling, Cully's going to drive you home,

and I'll be with you as soon as possible, all right?

Why don't I drive, if that's all right?

That's very good of you, Nicholas.

But we do need to talk.

Can you come into the police station, please?

Tomorrow, 2 o'clock.

At last.

I'm sorry you've been kept hanging about.

It is getting rather late.

And if anyone wants to go.

Now he tells us.

My sergeant will be in touch tomorrow and arrange interview time.

I elect to be seen now.

What are you doing, Kitty?

Rosette, you can't go back to Whitewinds by yourself tonight.

You come and have some supper with us.

We'll be cooking, won't we, Tim?

Oh, dear.

Kitty, Anna.

Don't worry about me.

I'll book into the nearest Hilton.

I can tell you now, Tom, that I felt a faintly

sinister frisson to this production from the very beginning.

What is the matter with you?

All I did was ask the richer girl back for a bit of supper.

When I sit down with someone, I like to be sure I'm going to get up again.

Come on, you don't mean Kitty?

Yes.

Oh, God forgive me.

Yes, I do.

Thanks.

Dad.

You're coming.

-There she is. -Yeah, I see her.

Are you Deirdre Tibbs?

Yes.

You're looking for your father?

I'm sure he's making for the day center.

Don't worry. He's two minutes in the car.

You feel safe there?

That's right. Come on, we'll get you there, love.

He wasn't a very nice man, sometimes mean.

But we were young together.

We were very happy for a while.

Can you think of anyone who would want to kill him?

Kitty, of course.

Well, he only married her because she was pregnant.

Now, chances are it wasn't even his.

What makes you say that?

She was having an affair.

Estelyn was going to change his will and start divorce proceedings.

Do you have any idea who her lover was?

Or how Eslyn found out.

Tom.

How was I to know what she'd do?

Oh, God, I'd do anything, anything to take it back.

I don't know what you think you're playing at, Tom.

Constantly passing me over like the boot boy.

How am I supposed to retain the respect of my actors?

If there's one thing I cannot stand, it's high handedness.

Harold, it's getting very late.

Whose fault is that?

And I'm on the verge of losing my temper.

Now, earlier on tonight when you were

backstage, did you see anything out of the ordinary?

Anyone there who shouldn't have been there?

Someone handling the props who doesn't normally?

I was hardly backstage at all.

People expect to see me in front of house.

It's the only chance they get to mingle.

I went to wish the actors good luck, of course.

You followed me down there, I believe, Tom.

The buzzer was late at the end of the interval, so I popped

round just for a second to chivvy that utterly clueless stage manager.

I thought the second part was much improved, didn't you?

Except for the utter shambles at the end.

Are you sure you know what's going on here, sir?

Certainly.

Someone has sabotaged Amadeus.

Did you have any reason to wish Esslyn dead?

Me?

He was my leading man, my star.

Now I've got to start all over again, training Nicholas.

Uh, Neil, you take Mrs. Winstanley home.

It's Marta Warren.

I didn't mean to be any trouble.

Oh, he's really lost it, hasn't he, that bloke?

Long time ago.

Just the type we're looking for.

Yeah, perfect. But he couldn't possibly have done it.

He wasn't in the wings for more than three minutes altogether.

I don't understand why he was done this way.

It's so risky, so complicated.

Yeah, all he had to do was wait for the

next dark night and bash the bloke's head in.

What if he couldn't wait?

What if tonight was his last chance?

I reckon that puts his wife in the frame.

She kills him at home straight off at a domestic.

This way, could have been anybody.

Good point.

♪

♪

There he is!

You can never be quicker, love, honestly.

Yes, but he's a stranger.

Daddy will be frightened.

It's all right, Daddy.

Mr. Tibbs?

Come along now.

Time to go home.

Daughter's waiting.

Washed in the blood of the lamb.

Streaming.

Streaming everywhere.

It's all over now.

Can we help you down?

♪

♪

I suppose there's no way he could be in the frame, old Mr. Tibbs.

Oh, for God's sake, Troy.

He was backstage.

If that's all it took, so was I.

Yeah, but you're not one sandwich short of a picnic.

Sir.

Oh, Tom, this is kind of you.

How is he?

Fractured ribs, broken leg.

He'll get better, but it'll take a long time.

I'm really sorry.

He was so frightened.

Yeah, it was a bad business.

Detective Sergeant Troy.

We were hoping you might be able to help us.

Anything.

Anything I could do.

I believe you checked the razor just minutes before the curtain went up.

That's right.

And the tape wasn't snagged or torn, as Harold has been suggesting.

It was in place.

No one is blaming you.

But it remains a fact that sometime during the

play, someone removed the razor and took the tape off.

What about this chap who played the valet?

David?

Oh, he handled the tray.

Would he have had time?

David?

Was there any point during the play when the wings were completely empty?

I went to the loo once.

It was at the end of the interval.

It took all of two minutes.

When I got back, Harold was yelling at me about the buzzer being late.

Could you drop me off at home, please, Troy?

I want to see how Joyce is.

Well, I don't, sir.

And while you're on the spot, there's a

couple of outstanding interviews at the bookshop.

Couldn't somebody else do those?

Well, you'll be all right.

Just hang on to your credentials.

Well, I know it irritates Tim, but I can't help it.

Every time he goes to the post or shopping or the

library, I keep thinking, is that what he's really doing?

Or is he seeing someone?

I'm sure he's got more than enough on his plate coping with you.

But I don't understand what he sees in me, Nick.

I mean, he's so elegant

and handsome and

austere, you know, sort of spiritually opulent.

So what's brought all this on?

I think it's partly because he hasn't always been gay.

Me, I was making sequined jockstraps for Paddington when I was three, but Tim.

Only, he veered hither and yon all the way through adolescence.

Even got engaged at one point.

I'm sure he's turned his back on all that now.

I suppose you think that's funny.

Ha.

Ha, ha, ha.

Yeah, I do, actually.

You're a cruel, heartless boy.

You wait till you fall in love.

I think I'm just about to.

So, when did you get this audition at Central?

The other week.

But don't tell anyone.

It's secret.

I should get the results any day now.

I've had a few theater jobs since I came down from Cambridge.

You're kidding.

Third, witching Macbeth and a Polish tour of Much Ado.

Brilliant.

How did it go?

I got mumps.

Our tents were washed away in a

thunderstorm and Claudia was head up for soliciting.

I can't wait to start.

So what are you doing now?

Trudging around the agents.

I'm up for a voiceover next week, Bea.

So, um, will you get a grant?

I'll have to come and see you then.

Steak you to a veggie burger.

David!

I, um...

I just thought I'd come and see how things were going.

Thank you.

Oh!

I must put them in water straight away.

Oh, they're not for your father, Deidre.

They're for you.

Really?

How are you, love?

I'm still a bit groggy.

I keep seeing him, over and over again.

-I'm sorry. -I'm sorry.

Tully!

Nicholas.

Tom, I came to see how Joyce was.

Well, you won't see how she is from here.

Try the sitting room.

Right.

Second door on the left.

Second on left.

Don't forget your interview.

2 o'clock sharp.

Oh, crikey.

Well, why don't you stay and have some soup?

Then you can go back with Dad.

Yes, that's right, the Corn Exchange, Causton, at 3 o'clock.

Photographers will also be welcome to photograph the

director, Mr Winstanley, in person at the scene of the crime.

The crime that was on the news this morning.

Oh, yes, and our drama group production of Amadeus was in full flight.

Hello?

financial time.

hello is that the Daily Telegraph?

oh yes and could you put me through to the theater department please?

yes yes I will.

thank you.

are they all coming?

they sounded very interested Harold.

who you want to know?

the Daily Telegraph.

they asked me to hold.

hold?

at daytime rates?

Why don't people put things back properly?

Look at this, a room of one's own under interior decoration.

Not sharp.

Lovely.

Hello again.

Afternoon.

Put the catch down on the door and turn the notice round to closed.

We're having our lunch.

Detective Sergeant Troy, Causton CID.

It's regarding Mr. Carmichael's death last night.

God, was it only last night?

I understand you were both there.

We were in the lighting box, yes.

At what point did you go backstage?

I didn't go backstage to laugh at the final curtain, but Tim?

Once.

In the interval to change a light.

Colin Smy was with me all the time.

Did you see anything out of the ordinary when you were back there, sir?

In the wings, maybe?

No.

Glass for you, Sergeant.

No, thank you.

Can either of you think of anyone who might have wanted to harm Mr. Carmichael?

Well, you've got a wide field.

The man was a heartless shit.

Had personal experience of that, have you, sir?

Bottoms up!

Oh

Zilch at the bookshop.

The little fat one wasn't backstage at all.

The thin sarky one, briefly.

But he was with Colin Smy all the time.

I got nothing out of Nicholas, either.

Though he did say that Esslyn had attacked him.

Crushed his hand, he showed me.

Hell of a mess.

Why was that?

He says he has no idea.

Bollocks.

I bet he found out he was Kitty's fancy man.

Better not be.

Let's call in Smiley.

Okay.

What the hell do you think you're playing at?

You were due at the station at 3.

I did it, Tom.

I killed him.

Are you confessing to the murder of Eslyn Carmichael?

Why did you do it?

Why? It's not an unreasonable question in the circumstances.

He was an awful man, sneering, laughing at everyone, cruel.

I decided he should be taught a lesson.

Bit of a savage home, wasn't it?

I didn't think he'd die.

Colin, what do you expect a man to do if

you drag an open razor across his throat?

How did you get the tape off?

With my Stanley knife.

And where's that now?

Still in the scene, doc.

When did you do it?

I don't remember exactly.

It was on impulse.

What did you do with the tape?

Flushed it down the toilet.

No, you didn't. We tried. And it floats.

Where was David while all this was going on?

He was in the men's dressing room.

Anyone can vouch for him.

Be able to vouch for himself from the look of things?

I don't know.

What are you doing here?

Picking up the van.

I'm collecting a friend after work.

What's happening?

Your father has just confessed to the murder of Eslyn.

Don't be daft.

He thinks you did it.

Me?

Why would I...?

You saw me, didn't you?

What did he see, Mr Smythe?

Estlin was being particularly vicious about Deirdre's father.

I was so angry.

I shook them, all of those little cakes he eats on stage.

-I'm sorry. -I'm sorry.

You silly old soul.

Fancy a cup of tea, Tom?

No, I do not fancy a cup of tea.

You're lucky I don't charge you with wasting police time.

Thanks.

Don't do it again, all right?

I've asked Deidre for supper tonight.

Really?

I didn't know you fancied her.

I don't fancy her.

I love her.

♪

Mr. Winstanley?

Yes.

Who are you?

Vicki Smith, Causton Echo.

Come to take a picky, do a little interview.

Where are the others?

Oh, they're covering the good stuff.

Beer festivals, horse shows, new Mel Gibson.

Always get the short straw.

♪

Could come back another day.

♪

Are you sure you're feeling up to this, Kitty?

I'll do my best.

It is for Eslyn, after all.

Quite.

Can you think of anyone, anyone, who might want to kill him?

Oh, well,

Rosa is so full of bitterness.

She led him a terrible life.

So you didn't take the tape off the razor yourself?

Tom.

It had a serious quarrel.

He was violent towards you.

He'd knocked you about on stage.

That was just part of the play.

And when you came off, you were heard to say

that if he touched you again, you'd kill him.

People say wild things when they're angry.

Sometimes they do them.

Mm.

Can you imagine me doing anything like that?

He discovered that you were having an affair.

That's a lie.

He was planning to change his will, sue for divorce.

No.

Leaving you without the proverbial.

And what about the baby?

Poor fatherless mite.

Is it his?

Of course it's his, you cheeky bugger.

A jury would be very sympathetic, Kitty.

Violent man, well off, yet still prepared

to consign his wife and child to poverty.

I didn't touch the razor.

What an utterly useless waste of a day.

I don't know, sir.

We've cleared quite a few people out the way.

We've cleared so many people out the way, Troy, we've got no suspects left.

DCI Barnaby.

Oh.

♪

Where's this place again?

It's over there.

There you go, Captain Rosie Lee.

A little bit of sugar?

That's a pound, thank you.

Cheers.

-How's that bacon coming? -Almost done.

Good.

Yes, gentlemen.

Great. Yeah? Detective Chief Inspector Barnaby.

This is DS Troy.

It's good of you to get in touch about the van.

Yeah, well, I recognized it as soon as I saw it on television.

You see that alleyway over there?

I saw it several times, going in, coming out.

And always that poor lady driving.

Agnes Crane.

Yeah.

Right, Troy.

I'd start at that end.

Yep.

What are you going to do?

I'm going to sample Mr. Green's bacon sandwiches.

Hello sir.

Trying to spot a break in an entering are we?

I think we should discuss this down at station don't you?

Sorry, Sergeant.

Well, now you're here, you'll make yourself useful.

All the rest of these garages need checking, starting with this one.

It's it

♪

♪

♪

♪

I'm sorry I had nothing ready Harold, it's not like you to be home at midday.

The life of the mind is what nourishes Doris.

The creative tumult in which the genuine artiste must sink or swim.

This is coarse clay by comparison.

Is there any pudding?

Oh, yes, um, rhubarb cobbler left over from Sunday.

I was wondering, Harold, will you be going to the funeral?

What funeral?

Es, Es?

Oh, Eslin.

No, certainly not.

Casting Vanya is taking up all my spare time.

In fact, that's what I'm going to do right now.

Pardon?

I'm going to pay a call on Nicholas.

I have to get him into training.

One cannot start too soon.

He has an antique disposition, but we'll soon stamp that out.

Yes, Charlie, yes, right.

Press conference, 6 o'clock tomorrow.

The arson antique mob from the yard should have got in touch by then.

Pictures, yes, pictures.

No, an arrest is not imminent.

So you reckon this is a work of art, then?

Good God, man, of course it's a work of art.

I thought it might have had something to do with religion.

Maybe it was once.

Once?

Well, churches have been robbed for years.

Stuff like this ends up in museums or with private collectors.

17th century St. Jerome was found in a

lake on a plinth, transformed into a fountain.

Nice one.

Yeah, but Agnes Ray was a Catholic.

Any likeness of the Madonna would be sacred.

Now, I don't know how she came by it, but I can't see her selling it on.

So that's soap, unscented, wholemeal loaf, tomatoes, a lemon, and marmalade.

Chunky.

OK, chunky.

You sure you're going to be all right?

What?

Uh, I'll be fine, Nell.

I'll be fine.

It'll do you good to get out into the fresh air.

OK, if you're sure.

I won't be long.

Thought I might pop in at the Blackbird.

Oh, yes?

I'll see you soon.

♪

Oh!

Congratulations, dear boy.

Nicholas.

Mmmm. Mmmm. Mmmm.

And remember, it was us that believed in you first.

No, thanks for all the support and encouragement, and the room, and everything.

Hey, it was our pleasure.

I'll never forget you.

We shall expect front circle seats for all your opening nights.

Did your disappearances have anything to do with this audition?

Yes.

Coaching.

Voice lessons.

Blackbird Bookshop.

Sorry, wrong number.

We thought you were having an affair.

What?

With Kitty?

I couldn't make love to Kitty.

She can't act.

Is there any more champagne?

No.

We've spoilt you quite enough already.

And it's time we reopened the shop.

I feel, I don't know, as if I'm on the verge of something wonderful.

Oh God, it's Dracula's mother.

Are you not letting him in?

He won't go away until we do.

Thank you.

I have the most thrilling news.

Oh, you've heard already.

Nicko's won a place at drama school.

Tomorrow morning, I sign a 10-year lease on a real theater.

And I'm sure they'll be very proud to know,

Nicholas, that I have chosen you to be my new leading man.

But Tim's just told me.

Lear looms, dear boy.

Oedipus, Hamlet, there is no reason why you

shouldn't play all the major roles under my expert guidance.

You don't listen, do you, Harold?

This is a realization of a dream for me.

Oh, there were times when I thought it would never come to pass.

Oh, I had my dark nights of the soul,

and my enemies, as great men always do.

And they are vanquished, as the enemies of great men always are.

Well, Avery, I look forward to your designs on Uncle Vanya.

And your ideas on lighting, Tim.

Nothing fancy.

It is Russia, you know.

Let's get on.

Dust is around the sink, Nicker.

Nicholas?

What?

Oh, yes.

I will.

Promise.

I have to go now, but when I get back, OK?

Do you think he will remember us?

Of course not.

He's on the verge of something wonderful.

♪

It's from Agnes Gray's bank.

A weird-sounding lot paid into her account.

Alec Barr, George Yardies, Count Godfrey Von Chetthoff.

Wouldn't like the job of tracking this little lot, Dan.

Should they prove to exist?

Sorry?

Probably false names, maybe covering a syndicate.

Iffy money, too.

Offshore accounts, Jersey.

DCI Barnaby.

Oh, good afternoon, sir.

-Yes. -Yeah, I thought it would be.

Yeah, I'd appreciate that.

Yes, thank you, sir.

Bye.

Do they know what it is?

A 16th century religious figure stolen from a

country church near Innsbrook, 11th of March this year.

So she's got this nice little number going.

Why share it?

Because she needed help.

I'd say she needed somebody in haulage.

I'd say that looks like pretty heavy freight.

Import, export.

How could I have been so blind?

Harold.

♪

♪

But you said that Harold would definitely not have had the time.

That was before I realized there were two razors.

Two razors?

Two razors. The first one was already in the tray.

The second one, he took in with him.

Just listen, listen, and I'll tell you

exactly why and how he swapped them around.

We know that Harold went backstage twice during the

evening, just before the show began and at the end of the interval.

So he must have made the first switch moments before

catting up, swapping the original razor with his substitute one.

This way, a casual glance at the props tray would reveal nothing wrong.

Excuse me.

Thank you.

He must have known it was going to be a fiddly job,

but the interval gave him the perfect opportunity

and ample time to remove the tape from the actual razor.

Trouble?

Flickered a bit, then went out.

I didn't notice that happening.

Don't you start.

And then, just minutes before act two, taking advantage

of Deirdre's absence from the wings, he swapped them back.

Where's the three-minute buzzer?

It's only just.

How dare you answer me back?

Poor old Eslyn.

Never had a chance.

So we bring Harold in?

Yes, we do.

♪

♪

Good luck with the bookshop!

You mustn't ring here.

I shall do more than bloody ring there.

If you don't come and meet me right now, I shall be

round to tell that puffy little tub of lard just

what the great love of his life does on his afternoons off.

Why are you being so spiteful?

Please.

You'll set me off on a bed-dive, won't you?

Look, I don't love her.

You know what?

I love you.

I wonder how they first got together, Harold and Agnes.

I doubt we'll ever know the exact circumstances.

But I think we know how it ended.

♪

♪

♪

♪

♪

♪

I

♪

♪

♪

♪

♪

♪

♪

Vi saluto!

Doris!

♪

Torres?

♪

-Matawara. -Yes, that's it.

I won't say anything.

Go away.

Yes, I think that would be for the best, Doris.

I'm changing my life quite considerably.

There'd be no place for you here.

Oh, yes. All right.

I'll go.

I'll go.

I wish I could go back, back, back there.

My dear, I don't think that will be necessary.

♪

♪

No!

Get an ambulance.

Tom, I didn't know you were here.

Harold.

Well, what a kerfuffle.

Still, it couldn't be helped.

They would try to stop me, you see.

Agnes Gray, Doris, Eslyn, two stupid

women, and a man with delusions of grandeur.

Well, all back to normal now.

Who's this?

Well, that's a friend.

And we'd like you to come along with us.

What, now?

Yes.

Oh, no, it's impossible.

I'm casting Vanya tonight.

Schofield will be along in a minute.

I've offered him Zed Abraikov.

But Harold, the press are waiting.

Huh, that moron on the Causton Echo.

No, no, no, no, the real press, the Times, Guardian, Michael Billington.

Michael?

Tom, is this true?

Oh, yes.

I must have my hat.

Thank you.

I knew this would happen, Tom.

I knew they'd remember me.

That was delicious, Joyce.

Cully helped.

I'm sure I could have helped you a bit more, Tom, with this awful business.

Nicko.

What?

Oh, Joyce, I'm sorry, I didn't think.

No, it's all right, really.

I'm fine.

In what way, Nicholas?

Well, Eslyn was always boasting that he'd make a

great director, but Harold never gave him a chance.

If you'd known, he would've saved Eslyn's life.

Was that the blackmail deal, then?

Yes, complete control of the new theater and the

company, or exposure of the business with Agnes Gray.

Do you actually have proof of that, Dad?

Yeah.

Kitty found Eslyn's disk.

It had details of all the transactions on it.

And Harold confessed in the last of his lucid moments.

Last of?

Well, he'd never come to trial.

Poor Harold.

Can you believe that anyone would commit murder

for the sake of a theater?

Dad!

Oh!

Right, a theater it is.

That's better.

♪

♪

♪

♪

♪

♪

♪

♪

♪