Original subtitles

Johnny!

Oh my god!

Oh shit! Oh my god! Every time I walk in a room, that's what you're doing. Do you

do anything besides jerk off?

Um, yeah.

Yeah? Like what? It's not like you have a job. Why don't you get a job where

your father works at Boomer Investments? They got a 1% return last year, and only

men that get 1% returns get women that look like this.

Oh.

Oh, okay.

Yeah, I want to be a winner, right? I don't want to be a loser.

Call your father.

Ask him for an internship.

Move out of my house.

You're right. I should ask him for an internship.

Yeah, I'm going to go do that. I'm not a loser.

Thank you. I'm not a loser.

Maybe put some clothes on first.

Okay, let's check this out.

Let's do complete idiot

guide to investing.

Okay.

Okay.

Let's download this app called Robinwood.

Looks interesting. I'm gonna download it Okay, so I got it downloaded

step one complete yes, I'm not a complete failure Okay, let's see here

Huh What

are all these graphs

Call

Put option what is all that stuff, huh?

Let me see some stocks I can buy

Oh

What what an interesting stock I thought that company went out of business

years ago, huh?

Okay, I guess here goes nothing last $50

Call

late All right thinking

now what

Okay,

I'm in the green I'm in the green hell yeah

I need to keep buying more stocks.

Think, Johnny, think.

My dad has an easy job. What the fuck?

I've never seen so much money in my life.

Maybe some more before the market closes.

Holy shit.

Whoa.

I've never seen so many commas in my life.

Mom! Come here!

Yeah, what?

Oh my god.

Who's the loser now?

Let me get a closer look.

Winner Oh Go

all the way deep I get better returns of my dad you better go all the

way

Worship it. Worship it.

Yeah.

Yeah.

Tell me I get better returns than my dad.

Oh, God. You get so much better returns than your daddy. Yeah. Tell me.

I'm the man of the house now, right?

Yes Yes,

look on them for good luck maybe you can get better returns on your investments

I want to see that pussy.

Yeah, let me give you a hug.

Oh,

yeah.

Oh, fuck yeah.

Oh, yeah.

Come on, look at you.

It's all mine, right?

That's all yours, sweetie.

Aw, you got that 1% from me, didn't you? Oh, I did.

What do you want me to do?

I want you to shove your cock in there.

Tell me.

Give me that cock.

I want that 1% dick.

Give me.

Please. Please fuck me.

Take this off.

Let me see.

Fuck you.

Time intake.

taking it to the moon.

Oh, fuck yes.

Oh, God.

Oh, God.

Oh, God. Oh, God.

Yeah, you gotta take me to the moon

Yeah, you don't want that

Spread that out.

I'm gonna take you to the moon for real now.

Because he sucks at it.

bang bros

Let me teach those kids to see.

Oh, it tastes like citrusy.

Let me fuck you like a street seller.

Let me fuck you like a street seller.

You ready?

You ready for all that cum?

Sorry, Dad.

I guess your wife has a new boyfriend.

Oh, oh, oh my God.

Oh my God.

You know what? I'm a little hungry after fucking you.

Can you go make me some tendies?

Okay.

Yeah.

Let me check on my portfolio.

Fuck I'm in the red four hundred and fifty three thousand dollars