Original subtitles

That's everything, Mr. Bates. Nice house! You must have a big family.

No, just me.

Mm-hm.

[grunts]

[moving truck engine starts]

[sighs] Strange.

There's a well here. Why, it's a wishing well.

[chuckles] Maybe I should wish for a wife.

[eerie music playing]

Yes, my love.

I will be yours.

[gasps]

And you will be mine!

[screams]

[theme music playing]

♪ If there's something strange In your neighborhood ♪

♪ Who you gonna call? ♪

♪ If there's something weird And it don't look good ♪

♪ Who you gonna call? ♪

♪ That's right ♪

♪ I ain't 'fraid of no ghost ♪

♪ If you're seeing things Running through your head ♪

♪ Who you gonna call? ♪

♪ Ghostbusters ♪

♪ I ain't 'fraid of no ghost ♪

♪ You know busting Makes me feel good ♪

♪ I ain't 'fraid of no ghost ♪

♪ Whoo-ooh! ♪

-[ominous music playing] -[sirens wailing]

[cats meowing]

[whimsical music playing]

[both panting]

[stop watch ticking]

[cheering]

[wheels screeching]

[sighs]

Whoo!

Well?

One fifty-five.

Oh, yeah!

Garrett, you're amazing.

Uh, where's Eduardo?

[panting]

"Hey, Eddie, I'll give you a head start."

Oh, yeah, no problem.

[scoffs]

[ominous music playing]

[gasps]

What?

[cackling]

-[tires screech] -Oh!

[laughs]

[gasps] Huh?

[whistling]

[both gasp]

-[haunting music playing] -[gasps]

-[laughs] -[yells]

[tires screeching]

[gasps, then yells]

-[screeching] -[car horn honks]

Huh?

Hello! Open up! Hello!

Can we help you?

Uh, yeah, I'm Leonard Bates. I'm looking for the Ghostbusters.

Well, look no further, my friend. Ghostbusters, at your service.

-[Slimer] Hi, nice to meet you! -[yells]

-Huh? Hmph! -[whimsical music playing]

She said we'd be together forever.

And then she tried to kiss me.

Ugh, that face!

Hey, man, was she a babe?

She had no skin.

Ooh, just how you like them.

Kissing is a classic conjunctive ritual.

Ethereal subjugation of the corporeal. I see it regularly.

Well, I don't!

I'm just a tax accountant from Long Island.

Oh, great, a yuppie.

Leonard. Leonard, chill. It's gonna be okay.

I'm guessing you asked for something at this wishing well. A woman? A bride?

[Leonard sighs]

Look, I spent my entire life in the city,

working hard, making a good living at the firm.

But I'm turning 40 this year, and I don't have anyone.

You know, to share my life with.

And meat face isn't what you had in mind?

Garrett, be nice. I think it's romantic.

[chuckles] Thank you.

Don't mention it.

We'll investigate the well site tomorrow morning.

It's rare for this type of ghost to stray far from its originating source.

But she did. She chased me through the city.

She's still out there, somewhere.

But just to be safe, we'll spend the night here.

Aw, man!

Well, I can't fall asleep in a strange bed.

Aw, man!

[whimsical music playing]

Dibs on the couch!

Too slow, big guy.

I hear sleeping on a hard surface is good for your posture.

[Kylie] Roland!

[toilet flushes]

Roland, are you going to spend all night in there?

-[laughs]

Nice jammies.

What?

Where's the little matching bunny slippers?

Haven't you people ever seen men's pajamas before? Sheesh.

Uh, I thought men's pajamas was a t-shirt and underwear.

Hey, Ed, whatever happens tonight,

I do not want to see those covers coming off.

-[Slimer humming] -Is that thing real?

Realecto!

[laughing]

Ah!

Oh, well, just keep it away from me. Gives me the creeps.

Who, me?

[belches]

Hey, Leo.

-Something I can't figure with you. -Hm?

You make good money doing that number crunching thing, right?

Well, I did before I quit.

And you just sold your two bedroom on the Upper West Side?

Yes.

What's wrong with you?

Well, 'm... I'm always... Nothing's wrong.

Finally everything's right.

I'd forgotten about what's really important in life.

I'm getting out of the rat race before it's too late.

[Kylie] Takes guts to make a move like that.

There's more to life than just cash, Garrett.

Like what, credit?

[exhales] Hey, man, the guy doesn't wanna work. I can relate.

-Hm. I know what you mean. -[pensive music playing]

I ask myself, "What do I want out of life?"

Big bank account, big car?

Nah. I want kids. A whole bunch of them.

What about you, Garrett?

Huh.

A son would be cool. I could teach him all my tricks.

We could race together and get him his own little chair.

Garrett, you might have a son that can walk.

Well, I guess I could still love him.

Know what I want?

To travel the world with a handsome, intelligent man.

-A man! Hey, hear that, amigo? -[whimsical music playing]

You're almost her type. One out of three's not bad.

[laughs]

My big dream is to kick your...

Oh! Oh!

-Oh, yeah? Oh, yeah? Okay! -[Garrett] Yeah!

[Eduardo] Oh, yeah. Nice try.

[eerie music playing]

[snoring]

[PKE meter beeping]

Guys, show time!

-Leonard. Leonard! -[proton pack energizes]

Where's my gun?

Whoa, first things first, mister.

[suspenseful music playing]

Getting readings all over the place.

Whoa, did you see that? Leonard's girlfriend.

- Didn't see anything. -I saw her in the reflection.

-Ah! Did you see that? -How could she move so fast?

Careful, people.

-[ghost cackles] -[gasps]

[laughing]

-[laughing] -[screams]

Hello, darling.

Don't shoot! You'll hit Leonard.

Pry her off, we'll cover.

[dramatic music playing]

Don't you ever run away from me again!

[grunting]

-[teeth clench] -[screams]

[growling]

[whimpers, then screams]

-Want a kiss? -No!

[ghost] We'll never be apart again.

[Leonard groaning]

She's sucking him dry!

-Lowest setting. On three! -[all] Three!

[screams]

Eduardo, no!

[all yell]

[groans] Mirrors reflect proton streams!

Huh.

[music stops]

The ghost, I presume?

No, we thought we'd do a little redecorating.

[ominous music playing]

You okay?

No.

Update.

Class Five.

And I think she was trying to suck the life out of him or something.

I knew it.

[PKE meter beeping]

Getting a singular reading.

-[music turns dramatic] -[yells]

-[yells] -[ghost roars]

[proton pack energizes]

[yells]

[grunts]

-Come on out and fight like a ghost, you! -[music stops]

-Reflective surfaces! -Say what?

Reflective surfaces. She can hide inside reflections.

Okay, then how do we get her out?

Come on! Come on!

I got an idea.

[moans] You have the most amazing eyes.

[moans]

Hey, this is stupid, man.

Eduardo! Work with me here.

[ominous music playing]

Maybe you could help me with my taxes sometime.

My financial needs are so neglected.

Well, I think I could fit you into my schedule.

Oh, Leonard. [moans]

Hey!

[screams]

[both gasp]

-Hands off my man, witch! He's mine! -[dramatic music playing]

[Kylie grunting]

I can't get a clean shot!

-[yells] -[grunts]

-[proton pack energizes] -[screaming]

[screaming]

[music stops]

All right, Kylie!

Well done.

We did it!

Okay, okay, show's over.

Eduardo, that was brave of you.

[sighs] Well, you know, sometimes my instincts, they, uh, just take over.

[whimsical music playing]

Are you guys together?

Together? Are you kidding?

[laughs] Ha-ha-ha.

Uh, yo, man, that's a rich one.

So now what? Is it dead? Can it get out?

[chuckles] It was already dead.

Don't worry, the only place she's going is into our containment tank downstairs.

And nothing escapes the tank.

Well, I can't thank you enough.

Our pleasure.

You too, kid, thanks.

-You too, kid. -[grunts]

Yuck.

[yawns]

-Huh? -Dibs on the couch!

[Leonard] Uh-huh.

Oh, the farmer's coming when? Okay, great.

Uh, talk to you tomorrow.

[ominous music playing]

[ghost] We're going to be so happy here.

What did I tell you about leaving me alone, huh?

What did I say?

To not ever...

This will never happen again!

We must finish our kiss.

-[Leonard] No! -[dramatic music playing]

[ominous music playing]

-[snoring] -[telephone ringing]

Yelps]

[sighs]

[Leonard] I thought you said she couldn't get out!

Bates, is that you?

You bet it's me! You guys didn't do your job!

-She's back, like nothing ever... -[static crackles]

[automated voice] The mobile customer you're trying to reach

is away from the phone.

[alarm blaring]

[dramatic music playing]

[engine rumbles, then tires screech]

[siren blaring]

[Garrett] Egon, I don't get it.

Roland and I personally put that ghoul in the containment tank.

-How could she have gotten out? -She didn't. She's still here.

Whatever is attacking Bates is some kind of copy.

Copy? Oh, man. I love this job.

-Darling, where are you? [screams] -[haunting music playing]

I don't like this game!

[screams]

What are you doing in here?

-[dramatic music playing] -Uh-uh-uh.

No kissing until the third date.

[growls]

[screams]

[roars]

[shrieks]

-[laughs] -[whistles]

[shrieks]

[tense music playing]

Now what are we gonna do?

[gasping]

[cackles]

End of the line.

-Do it! -Do it!

[screaming]

-Yeah! -Okay.

-What happened? Where is she? -[beeping]

-She's still in there. -What?

In where?

[tense music playing]

In the mirror.

You telling me we just gave her 40 billion hiding places?

I think she owes us a thank you.

Uh, Egon, we got a problem.

-Mm-hm. I see. -[pensive music playing]

I've consulted my database on psycho-kinetic turbulence

in that area of the state.

We may be dealing with a Class Four psycho-reactive specter.

What?

A demon that lures in its victims with their heart's desire

and drains them of their life force.

You may have to destroy the wishing well itself anyway.

It may be the originating source of the copy.

Follow me, I'll take you to the well.

[dramatic music playing]

-[grunts] Huh? -You leave my well alone!

[grunts]

[both gasp]

You're doing great, guys. Keep her busy, I'm going for the well.

What?

[shrieks]

-[Kylie gasps] -[cackling]

[screaming]

-[music fades] -Um...

Good job.

Garrett, pod two, trapped.

Roger.

[dramatic music playing]

-[yells] -Don't even think about it.

[screams]

[screaming]

[roaring]

[yells]

[roaring]

[all sigh]

-[yells] -[gasping]

[yelling]

[sighing]

[sighs, then groans]

Anyone wanna buy a house?

Don't forget the cheesy post cards. Okay, you too. Later.

Leonard sends his regards. He's doing Europe for three weeks.

Lucky dog.

Oh, yeah, rude French waiters,

inedible British cooking, kamikaze Italian drivers.

-[whimsical music playing] -Yo, yo, check it out, wishbone.

Oh, make a wish, make a wish!

Maybe not. Coleslaw?

[theme music playing]

♪ When the things that slither In the shadows ♪

♪ Keep you up late at night ♪

♪ When there's something lurking In your closet ♪

♪ Who can make you feel all right? ♪

♪ Whoo-ooh! ♪