Original subtitles

Murphy, I need you to clean out that office, and fast.

Consider it done, Mr. O'Malley.

The club wants the restoration finished by Monday.

They got some kind of party planned.

Of course they do. It's St. Patty's Day.

[mysterious music playing]

Huh. What have we got here?

[gasps]

Huh?

-[gasps] -[laughter nearby]

Top of the morning. Murphy, is it, now?

Now, Murphy, I'm not an unreasonable sort.

So we'll give you a chance to make good.

Where is it?

Where is what?

Ah, now, its games we're playing, is it?

-[Murphy] No! -[growling]

Now, I'll ask you one last time. Where is it?

I don't know what you're talking about.

So this is how it's going to be, is it?

[yelling]

Take a man's gold, there's the devil to pay.

[leprechaun laughing]

[theme music playing]

♪ If there's something strange In your neighborhood ♪

♪ Who you gonna call? ♪

♪ If there's something weird And it don't look good ♪

♪ Who you gonna call? ♪

♪ That's right ♪

♪ I ain't afraid of no ghost ♪

♪ If you're seeing things Running through your head ♪

♪ Who you gonna call? ♪

♪ Ghostbusters ♪

♪ I ain't afraid of no ghost ♪

♪ You know Busting makes me feel good ♪

♪ I ain't afraid of no ghost ♪

♪ Whoo-oh! ♪

[in Irish accent] The mail, sir.

[gasps] Burnt toast!

Heaven help you, Mr. O'Toole.

Hmm?

-Hmm. -That pattern of stones...

I've seen it before in one of my books on Celtic folklore.

It's called a mystic circle.

It was traditionally used to imprison supernatural creatures,

who would remain entrapped unless the circle was broken.

When I heard the commotion, I came running.

And then I thought I saw somebody, a real little guy.

Can you describe him?

Uh, not really.

It was like he was here and then he wasn't.

Sounds like a leprechaun.

If you look away or blink, they're gone.

What book did you read that in?

Actually, it was the back of a cereal box.

Hmm.

Based upon its density, hue and structure,

I'd say this stone is not indigenous to North America.

In fact, I believe it's a fragment of the Blarney Stone.

I know all about that.

You touch it, and it gives you the gift of gab

and a whole mess of good luck.

[chuckles] I read cereal boxes too.

Give me a break. There is no such thing as luck.

[Janine over radio] Boys and girls, we've got an emergency call.

[officer over bullhorn] Easy, Mr. O'Toole, easy.

Whatever the problem is,

jumping is not the answer.

He's not trying to jump, officer. He's trying to get away from something.

-[O'Toole] Get it away! -[Roland] On three.

[all] Three!

[maid shouts indistinctly]

[screams] Get it away from me.

I ain't afraid of no--

-[roaring] -[screams]

Shoot it!

Great, it's nasty, it's green, and it eats proton.

It's a class-four emanation, not ecto-based but ecto-animated.

Animated, huh? I'm taking this ecto cartoon down.

[Roland] Look out!

And that is that.

You don't understand. It's the little green guy.

[laughs]

[O'Toole yells]

[leprechaun laughs]

-[Celtic folk music playing] -[laughs]

♪ Up the airy mountains Down the rushy glen ♪

♪ We daren't go a-huntin' For fear of little men ♪

[laughs]

-It's a leprechaun! -What tipped you off?

Who are you? What do you want?

I'm himself, of course.

And I'm only after getting back what's mine.

And I'll grant you the favor of a warning.

Stay out of me way,

or I'll curse you with enough bad luck for a dozen lifetimes.

Ooh.

Bad luck. I'm shaking in my chair.

Go on, short stuff. Hit me with your best shot.

All right, me bucko.

Since you asked.

-Where'd he go? -We looked away.

-Garrett, you all right? -Didn't feel a thing.

[Celtic folk music playing]

So, uh, you feel anything yet?

Hey, Edwina, there's no such thing as bad luck.

[gasps] Look out!

Hey, man, just keep your distance from me, okay?

Come on, guys, we gotta get this burnt toast to Egon for analysis.

[Egon] Hmm, hmm.

These charred fragments are definitely... whole wheat.

Whole wheat? Mm, mm.

According to Irish legend,

burnt bread or mistletoe were often given to sacrificial victims.

You get anywhere with your analysis of the Blarney Stone?

Yes. And I think I may have isolated a quantifiable component to its makeup

that can counteract the leprechaun's paranormal abilities.

That gift of gab must be starting to kick in.

I just don't know what language he's talking.

He's talking about using the Blarney Stone

to create synthetic luck.

Huh?

I wouldn't go so far as to call it luck.

Let's just say that this stone seems to possess psychokinetic properties

that can affect causalities specific to the leprechaun.

Give a dose to Garrett.

Maybe it'll take the leprechaun's bad-luck jinx off of him.

Give it a rest.

Ooh. Mm!

Well, good luck to Slimeball, anyhow.

[burps]

We know the leprechaun's victims have all been Irish.

But why these particular people?

And more importantly, who's next?

[foreboding music playing]

[thumping on door]

-Come in. -[thumping continues]

I said, come in. Are you deaf?

Ah, what is this?

Hey, is this some kind of dumb joke?

What are you talking about, Patty?

Ah, you bunch of punch-struck bums.

[mutters indistinctly]

[leprechaun laughing nearby]

-[gasps] -[laughter continues]

[gasps]

Ah, 'tis a sad day when a Son of Erin forgets his own heritage.

For 'tis said, when there's three raps at the door,

but no one's there, it's a sign that your time has come.

[laughing]

We've got another call, guys.

Sounds like our little green friend again.

Where is it, then?

[grunting]

-Where is what? -Oh, don't go simple on me, laddie.

Save your spindly neck while I'm still in a charitable mood.

I tell you, I don't know what you're talking about.

Then you're a scoundrel

and deserving of the fate that's about to befall you.

You really shouldn't go with them, Egon.

You know how stiff your joints have been lately.

I'm not going with them.

I'm going back to the Sons of Erin building.

-Could you use some help? -Sure, he could.

Why don't you take Garrett with you? He's a jinx.

I'll jinx you, Goat Boy.

There's no scientific basis for luck. It doesn't exist.

Like the lady said.

-[Celtic folk music playing] -Uh...

[screams]

[ominous music playing]

[screams]

[laughs]

Nice and cozy, are we?

[Celtic folk music playing]

Okay, you evil imp. Put that pot down.

Now, what's the pretty colleen hiding?

This.

Ah, oh. Oh, silly girl.

You'll have to catch me before the old Blarney has any effect.

And what you can't see, you can't catch.

I'm not looking away. I'm not even gonna blink.

Now hand that thing over.

Sure, sure. Here you are. Let's not do anything rash, now.

[dramatic music playing]

[yells]

Oh, what was all that preening and boasting about not blinking, then?

Anyone know the effects of proton beams on jinxed teammates?

Hey, guys, it was an accident.

Roland, man, you don't buy into this bad-luck garbage, do you?

I... didn't.

Hmm. Murphy, O'Toole, McTavish...

You believe these people? Never throw out nothing.

Wait a second.

You guys, you're totally overreacting.

Face it, dude, you're bad news.

A double whammy. Not approved for public use.

All we're saying is maybe you should take a little time off.

Ah. So that's how it is, huh? Okay, fine.

There's only one thing to do

when your own teammates stab you in the back.

Eat.

[sighs]

I found some background data on our leprechaun.

The files indicate that he was inadvertently brought over from Ireland

at the turn of the century.

Unlike most leprechauns, who were at worst mischievous,

this one was pure evil.

He terrorized much of the city's Irish population,

bringing about hardship and a spate of what some would call...

Bad luck.

[sighs] It says here that the officers of the Sons of Erin Club

were the ones who trapped him inside the mystic circle,

sealed with a fragment of the Blarney Stone.

The leprechaun is going after the descendants

of the people that imprisoned him.

But it seems like he's after something more than just revenge.

He is.

After the Sons of Erin captured the leprechaun,

they used his gold to feed hungry immigrant children.

Now he wants it back.

But his descendants wouldn't know anything about the gold.

We're not dealing with a rational creature here.

These surnames match the victims.

And there's only one left.

[Kylie] McShane.

You don't think... The mayor?

[Egon] Hmm.

Janine, can you do a computer search on--

[Janine] I'm way ahead of you, Egon.

And apparently, Mayor McShane's great-great-grandfather

was a founding member of the Sons of Erin.

[Roland] You don't understand.

This leprechaun's got a personal vendetta against you.

The only danger around here is you people.

What? You got tired of inventing ghosts?

Now it's leprechauns?

You'd better keep a close eye on him, Jenson.

In about eight hours, all of New York will be able to keep an eye on him.

He's riding the main float in the St. Patrick's Day parade.

Good night.

Okay, now what?

We help him whether he wants it or not. Stakeout.

What happened to you?

Oh, let's see.

Nearly got run over, fell in mud, dropped half my pizza...

Here, I, uh, saved you a slice.

Mm... uh-uh.

Uh, any progress on that synthetic Blarney Stone gunk?

Yes. Earlier I isolated an ionic particle.

It should have a detrimental effect on the leprechaun.

Egon, you gotta help me. This bad luck is real.

Everything I do is a disaster.

[yelps, then gibbers]

Egon.

[sighs]

I see the problem. I'll work on it.

[dull music playing]

[both snoring]

Done. It should adversely affect the causality matrix of the leprechaun.

So the leprechaun will be a bad-luck magnet.

Huh. Just like me.

[Janine gasps]

[Egon] Oh, no.

There's barely enough to load one proton gun.

Oh, that's it.

I'm gonna lock myself up in the basement and never come out.

No, wait.

I prepared this earlier.

It's a derivative by-product of the formula.

It should reverse the negative causality effect

of the shillelagh emanation.

No more bad luck?

I didn't feel anything.

Toss the beaker into the air and catch it.

I'm back!

-Raspberry soda? -Grape.

[foreboding music playing]

[doorbell chimes]

Yes, yes, I'm coming.

What a great gimmick! What an entrance for the parade!

Uh, hang on, driver. I'm gonna change.

You won't be needing any finery where you're going.

Don't you know a death coach when you see one?

[whinnying]

[yells]

Help!

[Celtic folk music playing]

[laughs] Nice and cozy, are we?

Help! Help! Help!

[whinnies]

Help! Help! Help!

Hey, you guys, get up.

[engine revving]

-Nice going, Eduardo. -It's called a stakeout.

-You slept through your shift. -Only the last part of it.

[siren blares]

I demand you slow down.

You don't know who you're dealing with.

Oh! Don't I, now? Tell me, me boy-o.

-Where's me gold? -Gold? What gold?

Look, if it's money you want, we can work out a deal.

Oh, a deal, is it, now? [chuckles]

If ever a man deserved his cruel fate, 'tis yourself.

[engine revving & siren blaring from behind]

Ecto to Egon. I think he's headed for the parade.

[Garrett] Then you're gonna need my help.

I've got my luck back,

I'm packing anti-leprechaun heat, and I'm on my way.

[dramatic music playing]

[laughs] I love taking the bus.

Heading downtown. Meet us at the next stop.

-[Roland gasps] -[brakes squealing]

[crowd screaming]

-[McShane] Help! -[crowd cheering]

[McShane] Help!

[band playing lively march]

It's time to put the little darlings out of their misery.

[crowd screams]

[Kylie] Look out!

[snickers] Now, there's a sight to make a wee man humble.

[whinnies]

Steal me gold, will they?

Then a dear price shall they pay.

[ominous music playing]

[growls]

Big trouble, guys, and I stress the word "big."

[crowd screaming]

Don't leave the task half finished. Dance a jig on the rascals. [whoops]

We have met the enemy, and he is sludge.

I can see this requires me personal attention.

I demand to be let out of here!

I'm chief executive of the city!

Trying to ruin all me fun. Not a very sporting thing to do.

Neither is endangering innocent lives.

It delights me to say... you blinked.

[Kylie] Keep your eyes on him.

I'm trying.

[blows raspberry]

[leprechaun laughs] Blinked again.

[laughs] A poor excuse for brawlers you are.

First rule is, always watch your back.

'Tis an enjoyable game we're playing,

but it's time to end it.

[yells]

Oh, barely felt it, me boy-o.

Don't worry, boy-o, you will.

[truck approaching]

[yelling]

What was in that blaster?

Egon's synthetic bad-luck goop.

[leprechaun grunting cheerfully]

[laughs]

Hey, punk, time to ask yourself,

do you feel lucky?

No!

[leprechaun screaming]

I didn't think so.

[whinnies]

[mystical music playing]

[reporter] Hey, excuse me, over here. Can I get a statement?

Yes, can you give me a statement?

Yes, that's right.

It was all a St. Patrick's Day prank cooked up by a few of my aides.

[sniffs, then chuckles]

Uh, I'm afraid it got a little out of hand.

But fortunately,

I was able to put a stop to it before anyone got hurt.

You believe that?

Yeah, we save a guy I'd never even vote for,

and he comes out smelling like a rose.

-Of all the rotten... -[Eduardo] Luck?

You're lucky I don't pluck those little chinny hairs

out of your face, Goat Boy.

[theme music playing]