Original subtitles

[woman on TV] What makes you so sure this is an alien, Mully?

[Mully on TV] Look at him, Sculder. Antennae, green skin, bug eyes.

Do I have to write you a letter?

I'm sure there's a scientific explanation for this.

[ominous music playing]

[gasps]

Who's here? [clears throat] This area is off limits.

What the--?

-[electricity crackling] -Huh?

[clatter from above]

-[creature screeches] -[yells]

[creature screeching]

[theme music playing]

♪ If there's something strange In your neighborhood ♪

♪ Who you gonna call? ♪

♪ If there's something weird And it don't look good ♪

♪ Who you gonna call? ♪

♪ That's right ♪

♪ I ain't afraid of no ghost ♪

♪ If you're seeing things Running through your head ♪

♪ Who you gonna call? ♪

♪ Ghostbusters ♪

♪ I ain't afraid of no ghost ♪

♪ You know Busting makes me feel good ♪

♪ I ain't afraid of no ghost ♪

♪ Whoo-oh! ♪

[sighs] "Please re-enter password." Ugh!

For the tenth time.

All right, you want my password?

Here's my password.

Whoa. Easy, Garr. What's the problem here?

I'm trying to drum up some publicity for us

by creating a website.

It would be nice if I could get to the U.S. Online home page!

Let me help you.

[lighthearted music playing]

Hmm. Mm. Hmm.

Okay. Hmm.

[splutters] Come on, you...

You stupid...!

You don't wanna surf the net anyway.

The government uses it to keep tabs on everyone.

While you're looking at it, it's looking at you.

I'll tell you why you can't get the computer to work.

Probably because I haven't paid the bill.

Along with the phone bill, the gas bill, the electric bill and the water bill.

We haven't had a paying client in weeks.

Problem's not the computer. It's the online service.

Hey, you're a slacker, not a hacker.

Why don't you stick to your potato chips and leave the microchips to us?

An accident at the U.S. Online company

has disrupted service nationwide.

See, computers are overrated.

Watch some TV. You might learn something.

Ah!

[burps] Mm!

-Thanks for the dip. -You're welcome.

The damage appears to be extensive,

and authorities are investigating the incident.

That looks like ectoplasmic residue.

Looks more like monkey grease.

[reporter] The only witness had this to say:

Monster. Monster.

Monster!

Shall we?

[pensive music playing]

This has gotta be at least a class five.

With some serious claws.

Ugh. If only we could've gotten here sooner.

Don't blame yourself, Garrett.

There's no way we could have known this would happen.

I'm talking about the news crew.

They left five minutes ago.

All right, who's in charge here?

I am.

Wrong. I am.

Jack Stone and Harry Gannon, federal agents.

Bureau suspects sabotage,

which means you're now in our jurisdiction.

I want everybody off the premises and all evidence handed over to me,

and I want it done five minutes ago.

I'd say you got four, maybe five demons inhabiting this place.

Fortunately for you, we've got a special this week.

Sorry, guys, you're gonna have to leave. Official business.

Come on, Al. I'm trying to close a deal here.

Hey, you're making a big mistake, pal.

We're the only ones who know what's going on.

It's Ghostbusters. We're in the book.

-[door closes] -Who are those guys?

I don't know. Said this was the work of demons.

Offered to fumigate the place.

[Egon] This is definitely some kind of ectoplasmic residue.

But it has a similar chemical composition

to petroleum-based lubricant.

Told you it was monkey grease.

We're dealing with a gremlin.

Gremlin?

You mean like in that Twilight Zone episode with Captain Kirk?

How do you know this thing's a gremlin?

Because gremlins secrete an ectoplasmic lubricant

from their claws to loosen tight parts.

Monkey grease.

They dismantle anything mechanical.

All those airplanes in mid flight back in World War II.

Correct. And the bigger, the better.

Ever hear of the Titanic?

A gremlin sunk the Titanic?

They're small but capable of massive destruction.

A gremlin loose in Manhattan could be cataclysmic.

News flash:

There's a big problem at the main subway terminal.

[ominous music playing]

[passengers screaming]

Central control, this is Train 6.

Our speed has reached 120 miles per hour,

and our brakes have failed.

-[alarm blaring] -Train 6, we're doing everything we can.

Relax. Ghostbusters are in the house.

Can you take us to the central system?

We may know the source of the malfunction.

And you, get the network news here.

I'm about to give the public the feel-good story of the week.

[suspenseful music playing]

Keep it moving. We got a runaway train, folks.

Whoa!

Monkey grease.

We're getting warm.

[metal clanking]

[hisses]

[Roland] There he goes!

[metal clanking, then scraping]

I don't like that sound.

[chittering]

Oh, no!

Little elf must fry.

[gasps]

[suspenseful music playing]

The train!

[suspenseful music playing]

[alarm blaring]

No, it can't be.

We gotta disable Track 2?

Line up the rails.

-What? -Just do it.

I'm reading you.

[squealing fades]

[all cheering]

Gentlemen, I do believe we're back in the transportation business.

[all sigh]

We are gonna be on Letterman.

Oprah at least.

All right, Harry, what have you got for me?

The residue found at the crime scenes has the same chemical composition

as petroleum-based lubricant,

but there's a radioactive trace element we can't identify.

Whoa, sorry.

You guys wouldn't happen to be from the media, would you?

Jack Stone, federal agent.

Oh, man. The feds.

I'm thinking of applying to the Bureau after I graduate.

Garrett Miller, Ghostbuster.

You're just the guys we've been looking for.

And we would've caught the actual perp if we weren't so busy

rescuing a trainload of passengers from certain death.

Really? So who do you think the perpetrator is?

A gremlin.

Gremlin, huh?

You people must be very good at your line of work.

The best, the only... We're the Ghostbusters.

We'll be happy to capture the culprit for you.

Hmm.

All we want is credit for the bust

and presidential recognition.

You may be just the guys we've been looking for.

Don't you forget to call, now.

Oh, don't worry.

Hey, nice guys.

Egon, Garrett here.

You get any calls from the feds?

We don't wanna hear from the feds, man.

[Egon] I don't think we'll be hearing from anyone anytime soon.

The phones are dead.

Sound familiar?

Just like the online service company.

I think we know where to find our gremlin.

[Gannon] Kylie Griffin. Parents divorced,

close relationship with her grandmother, who died a year ago.

Owns a black cat named Pagan.

A brainiac with a scientific interest in the paranormal.

A loner without purpose.

[Gannon] Eduardo Rivera. Lives with his older brother, a cop.

They don't get along. Listens to punk music. Antisocial.

Hmm, a slacker with a knee-jerk hostility toward authority.

[Gannon] Roland Jackson. Oldest sibling in a large lower-middle-class family.

Involved in Little League, Food for the Homeless,

and other social activities.

Overburdened with responsibility and ready to explode.

[Gannon] Garrett Miller. Disabled since birth.

Keen interest in extreme sports. Loves the rush.

Studying to be a physical therapist.

Bitter about his disability and holds society personally responsible.

They're dangerous. Get me surveillance.

I want a full report of their exact whereabouts,

and I want it five minutes ago.

We're bringing them down.

[sober military music playing]

Everybody relax. The Ghostbusters are in the building.

Ghostbusters?

Wait a minute. That rings a bell.

Oh, yeah, your service was disconnected this morning.

Right. The gremlin.

No. Nonpayment of your bills.

You mean your systems aren't down?

I don't think you know who we are, gorgeous.

We're the ones who can save the city,

and we're expecting a very important phone call.

Uh-huh.

[siren blaring]

Bureaucrats.

Forget the phone company. We gotta find that gremlin.

[engine sputters, then dies]

Oh, for Pete's sake.

I'm getting traces.

If it was here, it's gone now.

You mean it hitched a ride with us?

Ew.

From the subway. It followed us from the subway.

We've gotta retrace our steps.

Where could he have gotten off?

[both] The phone company.

They were here, they left, nothing happened.

Doesn't fit the profile.

Um, Jack?

Clever.

They know we're onto them, so they switched vehicles.

Looks like they're about to engage in a little breaking and entering.

No, wait, wait a minute. Let's give them five minutes.

Let's see what they have in mind.

[ominous music playing]

-The gremlin's still here. -Over there.

[screeching]

-[Kylie] Hey. What's happening? -[Garrett] Who turned off the lights?

Uh, so, what is this place, like 30 stories high?

Big building, little gremlin.

Could be like finding a needle in a haystack.

Okay, pair off. Roland and I will start down here.

Garrett, you and Eduardo take the elevator to the top

and work your way down.

[screeching]

What was that?

Booby trap. They're onto us.

[whirring]

Nice evening, isn't it?

-[gremlin screeching from above] -Oh, you gotta be kidding.

Here's where we get out.

Car's not stopping.

It must have chewed through the controller.

[cable groaning]

It's tearing up the cable. We're gonna die, man!

We're gonna die!

Shut up, get up there, and stop it.

Why don't you?

All right, all right.

[Garrett] Kylie, Roland, a little help? The gremlin's on top of the elevator.

And we're in it.

Well?

-[screeches] -[screams]

[gremlin chittering]

Don't hit the cable.

I can't even see the cable.

[Roland grunting]

[suspenseful music playing]

Two stops, one stop... Hurry, Roland.

[Kylie sighs]

What just happened?

Maybe it's dead.

But the important thing is, ground floor.

Housewares, lingerie.

[device beeping]

It's here.

Boy, you think this stuff stains? Eugh.

[Stone & Gannon yell]

Garrett, what are you doing?

We got the gremlin.

Then what was I just shooting at?

In case you sociopaths weren't aware,

terrorism, sabotage, conspiracy, breaking and entering,

and assaulting federal officers are felonies.

You're under arrest.

[sober military music playing]

I'm telling you, we stopped the threat. It's gone, over.

It's a gremlin, and we trapped it.

You can tell it to Bureau Headquarters in D.C. Eh, Harry?

Harry?

And, Egon, hurry!

What are you doing?

Well, he's entitled to one phone call, isn't he?

Slimer, it's up to you.

All right.

Hey!

Whoa!

Look, we're obviously not going anywhere.

At least take a look at the ghost trap.

That's where the gremlin is.

If I do, will you shut up?

Hello?

Hello?

Yoo-hoo!

Government?

Ah!

[chomps]

[Kylie] That's it.

-It's a bomb. -[trap clanks]

You savages. This thing could go off any second.

We'll have to defuse it.

-No! -It's not a bomb.

Now, if I remember my training...

[Gannon & Stone coughing]

We're alive!

[Stone] Must have been a dud.

[chortling]

-Hello? -There it is!

The gremlin!

Agent Stone, is it? I don't know how to make you believe me,

but thanks to you, there's a gremlin loose on this plane,

and if we don't stop it, it will dismantle us right out of the sky.

Hey, kind of like that Twilight Zone with Captain Kirk.

If you're hoping for an insanity plea, I'm not buying it.

Take these off, and I'll sign a full confession.

Ah, I'm not falling for that.

[Garrett huffs] Look at me.

What am I gonna do?

Run away?

My legs are useless.

[sobbing]

All right.

All right, but, uh, no funny stuff.

[Garrett laughs]

Never underestimate the abilities of the physically challenged.

-[Roland] All right! -[Kylie] Hurry, Garrett.

[dramatic music playing]

[sighs] Come on, Garrett. We're running out of time.

Come out, come out, wherever you are.

-[metal squeaking] -Hey!

[gremlin laughs]

[Garrett grunting]

That maniac! He's sabotaging the plane.

Gotcha.

[screeching]

Ow, ow, ow!

[dramatic music playing]

[screams]

[both scream]

-Gremlin! -Gremlin!

Huh.

[Gannon] Okay, okay, we believe you.

[Stone] You guys are in charge now.

Where is it?

Hi.

That's no gremlin.

[grunting, yelping]

Stop! [yelps]

That's a gremlin.

Ex-gremlin.

No! The cabin's pressurized. The plane'll blow.

Stop!

[Garrett yells]

Not pressurized anymore.

[grunting, yelling]

What have we learned here today?

Never open a gremlin-filled ghost trap.

Okay, here it comes.

Top story, "Dramatic landing:

Ghostbusters emerge with trapped gremlin,

federal agents with egg on their faces."

Federal authorities have linked the mechanical breakdown

of this cargo plane

to the citywide mechanical failures in Manhattan.

That's right, that's right.

[reporter] The cause, microwaves, emitted by a surveillance satellite.

What? But the-- The gremlin.

Our publicity! [splutters] What happened?

[sober music playing]

[Stone] No one would ever believe it.

[theme music playing]