All language subtitles for Sunnyside (2019) 1x03 - Dr. Potato (English)

All right, listen up, you little punks.

Sorry, came out of the
gate way too strong there.

But listen up. It's been over a week

since ICE detained our
good friend Drazen,

and we still don't have any leads.

This is the best picture I could find.

That's from when we went
to the M&M Store together.

America is the best.

A whole store dedicated to
its least remarkable candy.

Look, if we don't do anything,

we could lose him forever.

He could get transferred.
He could get deported.

He's probably sitting
in a cell somewhere,

and I'm his only hope.

Anybody have any ideas?

Uh, we could bake a file
into a birthday cake,

and then Drazen could use that

to bust his little ass out of there.

Like in a Daffy Duck cartoon.

Well, that's actually more
like a Bugs character type.

I mean, not that I would even know that,

'cause, like, I only watch
sports and R-rated movies.

Please, call on someone else.

Uh, our dad might be able to help.

He and El Chapo broke
out of prison together.

Wait, Dad and Uncle Chapo met in prison?

- Mm-hmm.
- All right, hey,

uh, we need to find legal ways to help.

- Boo.
- Oh, come on.

Hey, Mallory.

Any hot goss from the operating room?

Broken bones, nasty infections?

Back when I was a surgeon,

I used to love a good
fungus every now and then.

- No, there is no fungus.
- Maybe next time, huh?

Fingers crossed for fungus.

Are you guys almost done here?

I actually have some of my
own friends coming over.

Well, the Postmates guy
is not your friend.

Uh, he knows me. We have banter.

Listen, Mal, this is
actually very important.

I'm trying to figure out how to
free Drazen from ICE custody.

I don't think I've tried
this hard at anything

since my first political
campaign 15 years ago.

That's not true.

The other night I watched
you try to pick up a fork

with your toes for 45 minutes.

Well, Drazen is a fork
that I won't give up on

no matter how much Alfredo
sauce I have on my toes.

I'm doing this, okay?
We're gonna free him.

Now, who's got something

besides Brady's Bugs Bunny cake idea?

Okay, that was on while
I was at the gym, okay?

Just blasting my pecs and
shredding my glutes.

Why am I the only one
talking today? Come on.

Hi, everyone.

Sorry I'm late, but I
made a very special cake

with a very special filling.

No, nope. We are not doing this.

It was butter cream,

and it was for Mallory's birthday.

Mallory's birthday's today?

Yesterday.

? Ha... ?

- Synced & corrected by MementMori -
-- www.addic7ed.com --

All right, what do we have
to do to find Drazen?

Hack into the mainframe?
Crack the database?

A virus? The microchip?

I was just gonna let you keep going.

Mm-mm, nope. Those are all
the computer terms I know.

ICE has an online directory

where you can search for
anyone who's been detained.

All we need is Drazen's
personal information.

I'm guessing you don't
know his A-Number?

His Alien Registration Number?

What about an address?

- Birthday?
- He's old?

Okay, no, but, uh, look.

Here's what we do know
about Drazen, all right?

Uh...

Really fun guy.

Uh, loves tracksuits.

- About adult height.
- Yes.

Probably had, uh, like,
a beard, I think.

Notice you're not writing
any of this down.

Do you at least know his last name?

I thought Drazen only had one name,

like Madonna or Pikachu or Garrett.

I have a last name, Jun Ho.

- Jun Ho's my name, too.
- No, no, I... Wow.

Okay, yeah, we literally know
nothing about our friend.

It's okay. It's a minor roadblock.

New plan.

Got it. ICE isn't gonna listen to me,

but Diana here is an
influential City Councilor,

so you go down to the
nearest detention facility,

Drazen's probably there.

You tell them who you are, and
they have to help you locate him.

I mean, I'll give it a shot,
but that place is pretty grim.

It's like the DMV's racist uncle.

Well, I'll go with you.
I used to work at the DMV...

until they fired me for
smiling at customers.

Great. In the meantime,

I will try to track
down Drazen's family,

see what information I can come up with.

There's this Moldovan
bodega he took me to once.

Maybe they know him there.

There's these amazing
Eastern European sodas

that taste just like wet potatoes.

Brady, why don't you come with us?

Might be helpful to have
someone who speaks Moldovan.

Oh, I don't speak Moldovan.

How do you speak to your
Moldovan relatives?

I don't. Up top.

- Why would I high-five that?
- Hi, we just discussed it,

and we decided that we
don't want to do anything.

I think it's what really
makes the most sense for us.

Uh-uh, not on my watch.
Drazen is our friend,

and we're gonna help him.
You're coming with us.

Can we at least go
home and change first?

We can't wear the same
outfit to a third location.

Yeah, like, what's the vibe at ICE?

- Is it, like, '90s boho?
- Kickball casual?

- White girls at brunch?
- Glenn Close but far away?

- Slutty Hello Kitty?
- Harry Potter, but he's dead?

Synchronized swimmers in outer space?

- K-pop serial killer?
- Mandy Moore but Chinese?

We'll bring options.

Hey, how's it going?

I'm, uh... I'm looking
for my friend Drazen.

He used to come here
a lot... really fun guy,

size of a full-grown
adult, possible beard,

very forgettable last name.

What are you, police? Repo man?

Bounty hunter?

No, no, no, I'm not a bounty hunter.

Although I did have a blonde
mullet in high school.

Drazen was taken by ICE last week.

He mentioned he was married.

Do you happen to know
where his wife lives?

Bojan?

- Is that little Bojan?
- Oh, God!

No, stop!

No. Okay. Oh, God!

- Okay.
- Little Bojan used to play here

when his mother'd go to work.

Hey, Bojan, you still like Bugs Bunny?

Wha... okay, that is not
my only discernible trait.

I'm strong. I manscape.

Anyone jump in!

I'd be happy to help
any friend of Bojan's.

But first you must help
me with my business.

You understand.

Yeah, in Moldovia, you have
to bribe people all the time.

- Oh, Ethiopia is the same!
- Yep, America, too.

Yay! The world is
disgusting and corrupt!

Okay.

- Next!
- Hello, there.

- Back of the line.
- You don't understand.

I need to locate a detainee.

My name is Diana Barea.
I'm with the City Council.

- Oh, you're with the City Council.
- Yes.

- You should have said that.
- Great, we...

Because there's this big
old pothole on my street

that I keep calling your office to fix.

So, uh, why don't you fix that?

And when you're done,

you can go to the back of the line.

Okay. I'm just trying to...

Back of the line.

- Are we next?
- This is unacceptable!

I'm an important elected official.

I mean, I gave Al Roker a
plaque on his birthday.

Yes, I know. Don't tell me.

- Tell them.
- Griselda, I'm hungry.

Do you have any beef tartare, Griselda?

- Beef tartare?
- Oh, you know what?

I'd be fine with, like,
a quail-egg omelet.

Griselda, quail-egg omelet?

Ooh.

It's an apple. Eat it.

Okay, yeah.

Um, apples are round, and mine's broken.

Also, there's, like,
no cell service here.

Wi-Fi is a human right.

People should protest these guys.

They are, but for...

Never mind.

Here, I have "Angry Birds" on my phone.

- Play that.
- OMG!

This is amaze.

We should totally buy this.

You don't have to. It's free.

No, I meant an exploding bird.

I want one.

Okay, here.

Now will you tell me
where Drazen's wife is?

Okay, wait here.

Throw in one sixer of Dr. Potato.

They were out of the chunky,
so I went with garlic.

This is her, Lyudmila Barbu.

You made him buy all that stuff

and she was here the whole time?

Damn, that's Moldovan as hell.

Hi, Lyudmila. My name is Garrett.

We're Drazen's friends, and
we really want to get him out.

- So we need your help.
- I'm sorry, I can't.

What? Why not?

Please just leave me alone.

Oh!

It wasn't a total loss.

I just won a trip to the
1984 Winter Olympics.

I don't understand.

Why won't you help us find Drazen?

- Don't you love him?
- Unless... an affair!

Stanislav, how could you?

Of course I love Drazen,

ever since the day we met
on that boat that exploded.

Wow, we really don't know
anything about this guy.

If they picked him up for nothing,

why wouldn't they do the same to me?

No, I'll stay here as long as I have to.

You're sleeping in a bodega?

That's insane.

Oh, so what's the rent, though?
Are you looking for roommates?

This is just another minor roadblock.

I think I can help with this, too.

I know somebody who would
be happy to host you.

Who the hell is this lady?

Excuse me. Excuse me.

Sorry. Hi, hi, hi, hi, hi.

Okay, great news.

Garrett actually came through,
and we have Drazen's last name.

- Does anybody have a pen?
- Yeah.

I've got Sean Penn, Penn Badgley,

Penn from Penn & Teller,

although he did block my number.

- Next.
- Go, come on...

Hello, again. We are
looking for Drazen Barbu.

- Wrong line.
- What?

This is the visitors line for
people visiting the facility.

What you want is the "visiting" line

to visit a person within the facility.

Over there.

You are just loving this, aren't you?

Yeah, a little bit.

Another line?

Well, obviously Drazen
wouldn't want us waiting

in two lines. No.

Let's go to Bali.

Hey, we're here to help a friend.

Now suck it up and get in that line.

- One...
- One what?

Two...

Why is she counting? What's happening?

I don't know what happens
if she gets to three?

- I don't want to know!
- Then move!

- Okay! Okay!
- Move!

Act like you've done this before!

Come on, Mal. Lyudmila is scared.

She's been sleeping in a bodega.

Yeah, and dibs have already
been called on her room there,

so back off.

Garrett, please don't put
me in the awkward position

of telling an immigrant to go
back to where she came from.

It's probably just gonna
be for a little while,

until we figure out what's going on.

Seriously?

This is my one day to clean up,
and it's mostly your mess.

Yesterday I found a
sock in the microwave.

That's not my fault.
I dropped it in your toilet.

Excuse me? Hello, there.

Can you please not touch my things?

I'm your guest. Please
let me make your home

less filthy and sad.

Um, I'm gonna go ahead
and see if Diana needs

any of my help. Hakim,

you want to just stay here

and make sure everybody gets along?

You got it, G-String.

I'm working on a nickname for you.

- That's not it.
- No, it's not.

Thank you so much.

I promise I'll make it up to you,

not financially, because
I still have no money,

and probably not in terms of
favors, because I'm very lazy,

but in some way that I'll
figure out, unless I forget to.

Okay. See you.

I, uh, don't really know
the American etiquette

for things like this, but...

can I poop in your bathroom?

We didn't even have to wait
this long to visit space.

I know, and space, by the way,

very overrated.

When can we leave?

I hate it here!

Okay, that's enough! No more whining!

If we're actually gonna be helpful,

you two are gonna have to grow up

and deal with the fact
that we have to wait.

What?

You're, like, speaking loud at us

and, like, frowning
with your whole face.

It's making me feel like
there are consequences

to my behavior, and I don't like it.

Have you never been yelled at before?

I mean, one time at a brothel in Prague,

but we had to pay way extra.

How did your parents deal with you?

Oh, that's easy. They didn't.

We were mostly raised by an
A.I.-powered robot nanny.

Jun Ho, Carlotta was not a robot.

Well, then why did she let me
feed her all those batteries?

Okay, this is just, like, way too much

to unpack at this moment.

In the meantime,
you two need discipline.

No whining. That's rule number one.

When I tell you to do something,

you will reply with, "Yes, ma'am."

Yes, ma'am.

This is so scary.

Griselda is like a dom queen icon,

and it's kind of hot.

Listen, I expect you to be on
your best behavior from now on.

We are all adults here,
so let's act like it.

- _
- No. No, no, no, no!

What the hell?

I've been freakin' waiting
in that freakin' line

for two freakin' hours,
and it's not fair!

Um, Diana,

I don't know if this has
trickled down to you yet,

but rule number one is no whining.

Shut up, Jun Ho!

Hello?

You have one job!

I think it's this way.

Um...

Uh, wait. Wait, uh, Garrett.

Garrett, I don't think
I should be here, man.

What are you talking about?

It's... it's too risky. I'm a Dreamer.

Yeah, man. That's what I love about you.

You've got big ideas, and that's great.

No, like the DREAM Act. Like, I'm DACA.

I was brought here as a kid,
so I have this status now

where I'm not, like, undocumented,

but I'm not... not, like, documented.

I don't know what I am,
but I don't feel safe here,

and one slip-up, that
could be it for me.

I understand. That must be pretty scary.

But listen, man, you've
got me on your side.

I've been killing it today.
Plus, we've got Diana.

She doesn't get pushed
around by anybody.

- Stop pushing me!
- Oh, boy.

Fine, throw me out.
I hate it here anyway.

I'm happy this is happening.
I'm actually laughing!

Hey, everybody.

Hey, Brady just bailed,

and I saw Diana get kicked out of here.

- What's going on?
- Griselda yelled at us.

And Carlotta wasn't a robot.

Not at all what I was asking about,

but please remind me

to come back to this because
I'm very interested.

We still don't know where Drazen is,

and we tried to ask that guy over there,

but he's not helping anybody,

and now with Diana gone,

- we're screwed.
- Okay, I got this.

Now, have I ever told you about
the time I weaseled my way

into Adam Levine's poker night?

- Oh, my God.
- Yes.

Okay, well, it's relevant here

because I can weasel
my way into anything,

except this time I won't lose
600 bucks to Carson Daly.

Hey, there, ICE man.
You looking for a maverick?

"Top Gun." Kidding.

- Back of the line.
- Love that.

You run a tight ship, you know that?

You're not gonna be working at this desk

for long. I can feel it.

Before you know it, you'll
be running this whole place.

You think so?

Never been more sure of
anything in my life.

Oh, New York Knicks, huh?

- New York Knicks.
- Yep.

If I were the Knicks,

I would have signed all the best players

instead of signing all
the worst players.

That's what I said when
I called into WFAN.

- They laughed in my face.
- No, man.

- That team's in trouble.
- Yeah.

Hey, you know who else is in trouble,

is, um, my friend Drazen Barbu.

B-A-R-bu.

You think you can tell me if he's here?

- Yep, he's here.
- Does it say what he did?

I feel like it's got to be a mistake.

He got picked up for a felony.

He, uh, pirated a movie.

That's it? That's not so bad.

It was "Spice World."

Oh, Drazen, no.

Looks like he's got his
bond hearing today.

Better head down there if you want
to make an opening statement.

Oh, I'm not his lawyer.

Yeesh. No lawyer?

Well, you better say
good-bye to your friend

because, uh, he gone.

Doesn't he get, like, a lawyer or, like,

a public defender or something?

You think we give him a lawyer?

We don't even give him a translator.

- Man, that's messed up.
- Yeah, yeah.

Yeah, they tell us not to
think too hard about it,

or else it'll give us nightmares.

Okay, I'll do it.

I'll represent him.

Well, you're not a lawyer,
so that's also a felony.

But I guess he does need
character witnesses.

Then that's what I'll be.

I'll be a character witness.

Doesn't sound as cool.

I know.

It feels so good to just sit
down and relax for a change.

Ah, sitting is great,

but have you ever tried doggy style?

What?

You know, when you curl up
on the couch like a dog.

- Doggy style.
- That's not what that is,

and I don't think that I'm the
one to explain it to you.

- Eat.
- Oh!

- Eat.
- Oh, wow!

Lyudmila, you have outdone yourself.

I thought I smelled some
meat cooking before,

but I thought maybe it was a candle.

Why would I have a meat candle?

I don't know. America is incredible.

You actively seek out sandwiches

that don't even fit in your mouth.

Anything is possible!

Mm, these aren't even my plates.

I bought new ones. Yours
were IKEA garbage.

They were.

This is gonna be easy.
I'm gonna walk up there,

charm the robe off that judge,

bring Drazen out of jail,
and then zip home,

pop some nuggets in the microwave,

throw on some jammies, and...

Huh. My night sounds way less
cool when I say it out loud.

Well, I'm just glad you're on our side.

And this hearing decides whether
or not Drazen gets out,

and it all depends on you.

His entire life is in your hands.

Can you imagine how his wife feels?

She must be so nervous.

Yeah, I hadn't really
thought of it like that.

I have.

But, you know, giving speeches
like this is your thing.

You must have done this a million times

back in your City Council days.

Uh, I didn't speak in the
City Council sessions

as much as I slept in the back row

with sunglasses on so no one could tell.

- Look.
- Garrett!

- You came!
- Drazen, how are you doing?

Oh, I'm okay.

- It's not so bad.
- Really?

No, I'm in prison.

It's very, very, very, very bad.

- Oh.
- But now I'm happy.

My life is in your hands.

Why are you so sweating?

Uh, no, no. I-I got this.

Mr. Barbu, since you are
without representation,

would you like to state your case

or present any character witnesses?

Oh, uh, yes. Hello, Your Honor.

- Uh...
- Go, go, go!

How about those Knicks?

I mean, those guys just
cannot get it together, huh?

My brother's in their front office.

- He's doing the best he can.
- Eesh.

Hmm.

Well, um, Drazen here is my good friend.

He, uh...

I guess he does have a
beard, it turns out.

Called it. He, uh...

he's a full grown-sized adult.

Uh...

Gosh, I'm really choking up here, huh?

I feel like I should be playing
for the Knicks. Eee, no!

Ay, Your Honor, can we have, like,

a one-minute recess or something?

- What the hell, man?
- It's too much.

It's too much pressure.
I-I need to take a nap.

- Do you have any sunglasses?
- Get it together, man.

- Drazen's counting on you.
- Brady!

I thought you were too
scared to be in here.

I was, and I still am,

but then I thought
about big, dumb Drazen

and how scared he must be.

I don't know what's gonna happen to me,

but I-I know that we
have to do something,

and you're our best hope.

But what if I'm not?

I mean, I've been
coasting my whole life,

which is fine if you never
do anything that matters,

but if I fail here, there
are real consequences.

Drazen will get deported,
and it'll be my fault.

But you can't just give up now.

I mean, think of it as
just another roadblock.

Look how far you brought us.
Come on, you got this.

- I do?
- Yeah, dude!

You got this!

I have not been paying attention.

- Oh.
- You're up, you're up.

Okay, all right. Um...

Sorry, Your Honor.

Sort of got started off
on the wrong foot there,

but, um, look, I'm an American,

and that means that I
get to make mistakes.

In my case, really, really big mistakes.

But I never had to worry about
whether I would get sent

thousands of miles away with
no hope of ever coming back.

Mr. Barbu here has been
living in this country

for over 10 years.

Pays his taxes.

He's an upstanding citizen.

He's a wonderful husband,

a boat explosion survivor, I guess,

and he spent the last week
in an overcrowded cell.

Why? Who does that help?

He's a good person, and he
deserves to be in this country.

Your Honor, if you let Drazen go,

I promise I will give
you 100,000 dollars...

- 500,000...
- No, no, no, no, no, no.

Stop talking now.

Uh, look, your honor.

Drazen came to this country with nothing

so that he could make
this place his home

and contribute to making
it a better place.

This is exactly the kind of
person who deserves to be here.

- No.
- Wait, what?

Bond denied.

Next!

You did the best you could,
Garrett. I'm proud of you.

Yeah, well, my best wasn't good enough.

No, it wasn't. I mean, I was
just trying to be polite.

- It was a very sad outcome.
- Yes, thank you, Griselda.

You know, I've been humiliated
on national television.

I've been forced out of office.

I've had dried Alfredo sauce

stuck to my toes for three days,

and yet somehow this feels worse.

Well, that's 'cause you care, man.

Caring sucks.

Also, take a shower.
What's wrong with you?

Oh, that reminds me,
thanks for caring about us.

Uh, this is $500.

We wanted to pay you back for the apple.

Oh, my God. Is that not enough?

We tried to look up how much

you're supposed to tip an apple cutter,

but there's no information
about it online.

Hold on. I-I have more, though, so...

Okay, next we're gonna work
on your budgeting skills.

But, you know, 50 is what
you would pay a babysitter,

so, you know, I'll just take that.

Guys, guys, guys! Guess what.

I followed up about Drazen,
and I've got some good news.

They're going to hold him indefinitely.

Huh? How is that good news?

It means it's not over.

I just spoke to an immigration attorney

who overheard what you
said in the courtroom.

She's gonna represent him pro bono.

What you did in there mattered.

Oh, this is a good thing, Garrett.

It would have been nice if
Drazen could come home today,

but we're going up against
a system that's designed

to make progress nearly impossible.

It's not a win, no, but
it's certainly not a loss.

Yeah, you're right.

It's, uh... it's just another roadblock.

Oh, and I made sure to check
if Drazen's wife's papers

are all in order, and they are,

so she doesn't have to keep hiding.

Lyudmila, please, you don't have to go!

I'll kick Garrett out instead.

Please let me kick Garrett out instead.

I-I was planning on doing it anyway.

Thank you for helping me, but I must go.

Promise me you'll dust more.

Your apartment is disgusting.

Okay, well, I do work
full-time, so it's...

Good-bye.

Tell Garrett I said thank you.

No.

So should we see what's on TV?

What are you still doing here, Hakim?

Doggy style.